Salt & Caramel

What to do in Wurzburg on a Cruise

Lynn — Mon, 16 Dec 2019 15:43:56 +0000

While many cruise ship tourists who visit my city go on a guided tour, a few intrepid adventurers decide to go it alone. For these folk, I’ve put together a list of the best things to do in Wurzburg on a cruise. This post aims to give you a walking tour that you can do in a day easily, taking in the main tourist attractions, while giving you some insider tips of what to see in Wurzburg. You probably won’t have time to visit all the attractions on this list, so choose the ones that you want to see and wander past the others. Cruise Ports in Wurzburg Let’s set off! You’ll most likely be at the new Wurzburg Cruise Port right underneath the Löwensbrücke (officially called the Ludwigsbrücke but because of the stone lion statues, known in Wurzburg as the lion’s bridge). It’s about a 10-minute walk from here into town. When you get off the boat, turn to your left and walk along the promenade, right under the Festung Marienburg (the Fortress on the hill). If you are at the Neuer Hafen Cruise Port in Wurzburg, then you are just about the same distance from town, just further downstream. There is a footpath along the river, or you can walk along the main road till you get to the Congress Centrum then walk along the river past the Alter Kranen (the old crane) till you get to the Alte Mainbrücke. At the Alte Mainbrücke, we will begin our tour. Self-Guided Walking Tour of Wurzburg You can download audio files that give information about the main tourist attractions, download the Wurzburg city app, or download guides and maps on the city website. If you prefer a guided tour, the city offers tours in English during the summer months, currently Thursday through Saturday at 11 am, starting at the Falkenhaus (Tourist Information). The tour takes 1 1/2 hours. From the River Main to the Dom and Falkenhaus Now, you’ll want to save the Alte Mainbrücke, the bridge with the statues, till later. We’ll come back to it. For now, head into the city. Anglophiles should stop at Eton Place to stock up on shortbread and whisky. A couple of doors down is the shop Formschön. Here you’ll find pretty accessories, silk scarves, herbs and spices and a whole lot more. And now you are at the Rathaus. Take a moment to pop into the memorial for the 16th March 1945, and the model showing Wurzburg after the terrible night of bombing. There isn’t an official tour of the Rathaus, but you can take a look inside. The department store Woehrl behind the fountain has a gorgeous rooftop cafe with a view over the river. When you come back out of the Rathaus, face away from the bridge, looking up the street towards the large building with two bell towers. The shop, Schlier, on your left as you walk up is good for little gifts such as tea-towels or fancy tablecloths (straight through the underwear section and up the stairs). Opposite Schlier, you’ll find the WVV, the public transport company in Wurzburg. You can buy a daily ticket here if you want to take a tram or a bus, but most of the city centre tram stops also have a machine where you can buy tickets. A daily ticket costs at present €5.40 for one person, €10.90 for a family. The WVV offers a Culture Route bus trip that takes you around the city, starting at the Residenz. In the Dom (Cathedral), tours are only in German, but if you are here between Easter and end of October, try and time your visit so that you are at the Dom around midday. At 12.05pm, there is a short organ concert for 15 minutes. There are an astounding 60 churches in Würzburg, and you could hop from one to another in the city centre. If that’s your cup of tea, pop into Neumuenster next to the Dom, and the Marienkappelle (Church of Our Lady). From the Dom, you can take a ride in a horseless carriage for €10 per person for a 15-minute ride or €19.50 per person for a 45-minute ride. Walk further along the main street to the Marktplatz (Market Square) and the Falkenhaus which houses the city library and the tourist information. If you are in need of a coffee, Cafe Michel is the place to go. They have a whole range of different strudels to try, including savoury ones. Squirrel Street to the Bishop’s Palace The Marktplatz is split into two squares, the Obere Markt (where the Falkenhaus) and the Untere Markt where you’ll find the farmer’s market and the best Bratwurst in the city. Right in front of the Marienkappelle (Chapel of Our Lady), the glass pavillion houses little shops that mainly sell specialities from the region. The first Bratwurst stall, Knüpfing – or as they are locally known – Geknickte. To ‘knick’ something is to bend or break in half. These long sausages are broken in half in order to fit them into the bread roll. Order ‘eine mit’ – with mustard or ‘eine ohne’ – without mustard and you’ll sound just like a local! Go back to the Obere Marktplatz, passing the Falkenhaus again, and go up the street called Eichhornstrasse (with the clothing shop Zara on your right). This street name translates to Squirrel Street. See how many squirrels you can spot on the ground as you walk up this street. Talking of looking at the ground, when you are out and about in Würzburg, and indeed in other cities in Germany, look out for the Stolpersteine. These miniature memorials commemorate the victims of the Third Reich regime. The small brass plaques with the name of the residents who were deported or murdered by the Nazis are an effective reminder of those who are missing. Pop down the side street Martinstrasse on your right (Rösner bakery on the corner) to take a quick look at the Lusamgarten, where the Middle Ages minstrel Walter von der Vogelweide is buried. On the other side of the street, is Wilhelmstrasse, where you’ll find Cafe Fred, and on Herzogenstrasse, the Italian bistro Casa del Gusto, both great for a quick lunch, and Amon – a wonderful store for keen bakers. Back on Squirrel Street, walk up to the giant QR code on the ground. At the corners of the QR code, you’ll find mini codes, exact replicas of the huge one on the ground. Take a photo of it to see which website opens up. The road splits here, but you want to keep the right which will lead you up to the theatre. From the theatre, turn to your right again and you’ll discover the Residenz. The Residence Palace offers daily tours in English, which take just under an hour. Afterwards, you can take a stroll through the gardens or, if you prefer less manicured gardens, go through the wrought iron gate at the left side of the Residenz, walk up to the end of the road and take a stroll through the Ring Park. This green oasis circles the city where the city walls used to be. If you wish to visit the Festung Marienburg, you can catch the Culture Route bus from the Residenz. Purchase a day ticket and use this as a hop-on-hop-off experience, or a return if you want to go straight to the Marienburg and back. The City Train also departs from the Residenz. To help you decide which of these options is best, I’ve compared them for you. If you wish to take a detour, it’s about a 15-minute walk to Shalom Europa, the Jewish Museum, which is open Monday to Thursdays. You can take the bus (Route 9) from opposite the theatre. Wurzburg’s Wineries When you are standing with your back to the Residenz, look to your right. The large building, in the same architectural style, is the Staatliche Hofkeller Winery. Their wine cellars run under the Residenz. There are tours, but not in English but do pop into the lovely wee shop and have a look around. When we walk back towards town, passing the theatre and going straight down the road, we come to the next of Würzburg’s three wineries, Bürgerspital. This winery was founded in 1316 to finance a Spital – a hospital. Even today, the sale of wine supports the retirement homes run by the company in Würzburg. The glossy new winebar is a great place to have a snack. They do ‘Franconian Tapas’, where you can try mini portions of traditional meals, such as Gerupfter (Camembert cheese with paprika spice) and Mini Bratwurst. If you are here in the summer, then go around the side of the building to the Weingarten. Do peek into the old Weinstube though, where locals regularly have a Schoppen (a 0.25l glass of wine). When they renovated a few years ago, I was really glad to see that they left this old part of the building intact. At 11 am, 1 pm, 3 pm and 5 pm you can catch the Glockenspiel at the Bürgerspital. The merry chimes of 13 bells play as the figures of pilgrims Kilian, Colonan and Totnan are shown, then winemakers dance and toast those watching. Keep walking down the Theaterstrasse to Barbarossaplatz and the top of the impressive Juliuspromenade. The building to your left as you walk down is the Juliusspital, the third of the famous Wineries in Würzburg. Like the Bürgerspital, it was founded as a way to finance a hospital. The main building along the street is still a hospital. About halfway down the street, you’ll find a large gateway to the inner courtyard. The Rokoko Apotheke (rococo pharmacy) is open from 3 pm to 4 pm from Monday to Friday. Go through the next archway to the gardens of the Juliusspital. There are daily tours of the wine cellars in German. Check the website for details of English tours as they change from season to season. If you don’t have time to take a tour, walk through the garden. To your left is the Garten Pavillon, originally used as a ceremonial hall for festivities. It was used a lecture hall by the Institute of Anatomy for over 100 years before being used for the newly-founded Institute for Pathology from 1845. The sculptures show two anatomists, one holding a heart and the other holding a skull. The Garten Pavillon has been returned from its rather grisly usage back to the original function as a hall for celebrations. Turn to your right and walk out of the garden to find a miniature Weinberg (vineyard). Take a good look at the stones under the vines. Notice the different colours. These are stones from the wine-growing area of Franconia: Sandstone, Shell Limestone, and Keuper. As you sail on the Cruise Ship down the River Main, look at the colours of the buildings. Between Frankfurt and Wurzburg, around the area of Miltenberg and Wertheim, you’ll notice the houses are built of red sandstone. That’s the Bunte Sandstein on the right. The middle stone is yellow, like the Residenz in Wurzburg and the buildings in the area around Volkach. And finally, the grey Keuper is the same colour as the buildings you’ll see as you continue your trip down the Main. You can see that the geology of the region is reflected both in the architecture and in the taste of the wine. The same grape variety, grown on each of these areas, results in very different tasting wine. Along the River and the Brückenshoppen Come back through the gardens to the Juliuspromenade and walk down to the river. You can walk under the Alter Kranen (Old Crane). This crane was used from 1773 to 1846 to transfer goods on and off riverboats. The buildings are now home to several restaurants, from a simple Biergarten to an Italian pizzeria and a Steak House. The pizzas at Locanda are as big as a coffee table...

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Tour Scotland in Two Weeks

Lynn — Mon, 04 Mar 2019 15:08:25 +0000

My German friends, family and colleagues often get in touch when they are planning a trip to Scotland. “Where should I go?”, they ask. And since I’ve answered this question many times before, I thought it would be good to write down my ultimate Tour Scotland in Two Weeks Itinerary. There’s no way you can see in Scotland in two weeks, so pick what most interests you from the links I provide. I’m tailoring this to the places and activities that I think will most appeal to my overseas readers and that you’ll not find in every tourist guide. This is based on personal experience and so totally subjective! I’ll also add in any tips I get from friends, online and offline. There are amazing places not on my list, because they are slightly off my chosen route, or they involve longer drives and/or ferry trips (i.e. much of the far north, Shetland and Orkney etc). That doesn’t mean they aren’t worth visiting but if you go there, you’ll have to cross some of the other places off the list. Generally, my advice is to save more remote areas for the next trip. I mean, you don’t think you can go to Scotland just once? If you decide you want to go further north on this trip, do ensure that you schedule enough time. The further north, the smaller the roads and what seems like a short 100km drive turns out to take several hours! We don’t have autobahns up here, folks. A word to motorways. We don’t have many in Scotland, and none that go further north than Perth. You’ll find some main routes are Dual Carriageways, with two lanes of traffic on each side. The main difference between these and motorways is that in many cases, there are no bridges or underpasses to cross traffic. It’s a bit scary sometimes because you are stuck in the middle of the dual carriageway, waiting for a gap in traffic so that you can drive off. The road up to Aberdeen is notorious for nasty accidents, as is the A9 between Perth and Inverness. For this reason, there are very strict restrictions on speed and many speed cameras, including ones that measure your average speed. Stick to the limit and watch out for crossing traffic on these roads. Are you planning on camping? If you wish to stay at several of the Caravan Club sites, it might be worth becoming a member. It costs £52 for the year, and gives discounted rates for some of the nicest and best-maintained campsites in the UK. You don’t have to stay at a campsite – wild camping is allowed in most areas, but familiarise yourself with the laws first. This is a really excellent post, which explains some of the issues, including that ‘wild camping’ doesn’t include parking your motorhome anywhere you please, and the importance of being sensitive to the environment, livestock and the people who live in the area. If I were you, I’d plan a couple of days in specific areas and do day trips in that area, rather than packing up and searching for a B&B every evening. In the summer, you may want to book accommodation in advance, particularly if you are travelling with kids or a dog and in really popular areas such as Skye or Edinburgh during the Festival. Other times of the year, you are probably ok with looking for a hotel or B&B on the day of travel. Throughout the spring and summer months, Scotland has Highland Games in towns around the country. Just check the Events Calendar of the Scottish Highland Games Association to find out which one is on when you are there. Some of them are quite small events, so go for the slightly larger towns, such as the Atholl Gathering in May and the Strathmore Highland Games in June, the Luss Highland Games in July, and the Crieff Highland Games in August if you want to see the full range of events. With all that said, let’s start the car and hit the road. Getting There I’m going to assume that if you are driving from Europe to Scotland, you’ll probably take the DFDS Amsterdam to Newcastle ferry. That’s the one I would recommend, not least because we recently discovered that you can book a dog-friendly cabin. I always hated leaving our dog in the kennel overnight, so this is a huge advantage. This ferry also gets you into the UK about an hour or so south of the England/Scotland border, so worth booking to save driving through England. The short crossing via Dover-Calais or the Channel Tunnel is a lot cheaper, but once you factor in petrol costs and an extra overnight stop, I reckon the longer ferry is worth the money. An alternative is the P&O Ferry to Hull, which means a couple of hours more driving but you could combine with a visit to York. If you fly to Scotland, then you’ll likely be starting at either Glasgow or Edinburgh. This choice will depend on which city your closest home airport flies to, but if there isn’t much difference in price then I’d go for Edinburgh because it’s smaller. We always try to get to Ijmuiden early. If we have time, we have a walk on the beach. Otherwise, we have Kibberling before getting on the ferry at the restaurant nearby. Recommended Route This is just a suggestion, and you can, of course, do things in a different order. I’ve tried to fit as much in as I can in a timeframe that won’t leave you rushing to see too much. For those who have more than two weeks to tour Scotland, I’ve added some extra suggestions for little detours. I’d suggest the east coast first for two reasons. First, it leaves the more dramatic areas of Scotland till later in the trip, so you’ll feel like you are building up to them. And also because getting used to driving on the wrong side of the road takes a bit of adjustment, and you can do that before you get to the really far north, with the narrow roads and passing places. Heading North via Jedburgh and the Borders When you arrive in Newcastle, you get a crash course in roundabout driving. It’s fairly easy to find the right road. Just look for the signs for NORTH or SCOTLAND. The coastal road A1 via Berwick upon Tweed is slightly faster but my favourite is the A74 via Jedburgh and Melrose. If you want to feel like you are really properly in Scotland, then this is the route for you. Stop at the Abbey Bridge Tollhouse Cafe at Jedburgh Abbey car park for a cup of tea and a bacon roll or drive on to Melrose to stretch your legs and check out the lovely little shops and cafes such as Apples for Jam and the impressive Melrose Abbey. Close by, you will find the Leaderfoot Viaduct. The home of Scotland’s most famous novelist Sir Walter Scott, Abbotsford House is close to Melrose. A ‘flibbertigibbet of a house‘, he called and it really is worth a visit, even if just for the library. Scott’s View is said to be one of the places where Sir Walter Scott liked to sit and reflect. Fans of Harry Potter should consider taking the coast road to Berwick and visiting Alnwick Castle, which was used for the outdoor scenes of Hogwarts (see the end of this post for more details). Map of Route The Capital City Edinburgh I’d suggest at least one night in Edinburgh, depending on whether you want to head straight there or spend some time in the border region. Edinburgh is only a couple of hours from the ferry so, in theory, you could be there by early afternoon and then head off the next day. You’ll probably want to spend more than a few hours in our capital city. The best (but most crowded) time of the year is August when the Royal Edinburgh Military Tattoo and the Edinburgh Fringe bring visitors from around the world. You’ll have to book early to get tickets for the Tattoo but you can decide fairly spontaneously which of the hundreds of shows you’d like to watch at the Fringe. Parking in Edinburgh is expensive, so you may want to use the Park and Ride at Straiton and avoid the hassle. A really lovely area of Edinburgh to stay is the rather hipster Bruntsfield, which is about half an hour on foot from the old town, through a large park called The Meadows. There is a fantastic German bakery in Bruntsfield called Falko for Germans who want to stock up on rye bread and brezels! Once you are in town, head down the alleyway behind the Apple Store to find Snax. It’s nothing fancy but you’ll get the best-cooked breakfast made to order for well under £5. The Kingdom of Fife Heading north out of Edinburgh, take a quick stop in South Queensferry to admire the Forth Bridges before crossing the river estuary to the Kingdom of Fife. Drive along the coastal route via Burntisland and then take the road to Elie at Upper Largo. Elie is one of many little fishing villages along this stretch of coastline that is called the East Neuk. The Scots word ‘neuk’ is the same as the English word ‘nook’, a small corner. I’ve written a post about this area which is designed for a full day trip or even several days but you might need to choose just one village to visit, depending on how much time you have. If you want a walk along the beach, I’d head to Elie. For a cute little fishing village with wonderful little cafes such as the Cocoa Bean Cafe and Chocolatier (go here in autumn and winter for real hot chocolate!) and Crail Harbour Tearoom (with a stunning view), then Crail is your destination. Pittenweem has the feeling of an old-fashioned holiday village and is a good mix of the above. The Fisheries Museum in Anstruther is great with kids. You can get them excited about it by downloading the Minecraft version of the museum! Travelling with kids? Then don’t miss Cairnie Fruit Farm. It’s an adventure park for kids with a wonderful cafe, and lots of wholesome fun to be had. They have a holiday home on the premises too. A good place to stay in the evening is St Andrews, the home of golf and the first university in Scotland. There is a great selection of pubs and restaurants, and you mustn’t miss ice cream at Jannetta’s. Map of Route Dundee, City of Discovery Ok, so I obviously have to include this because I’m from Dundee but it really is a fantastic place. Not only for the recently opened V&A Design Museum. Set right on the Tay estuary, Dundee is really quite spectacular and getting better every year. The best scones in Dundee (well, in Fife really but we’ll claim them as ours) is Kitschnbake in Newport. Or head out to the Ship Inn in Broughty Ferry for a pint in a proper pub. With carpets! The food in the restaurant upstairs is pretty good, as is the nearby Fisherman’s Tavern. If you decide to stay a couple of days in this area and do some day trips from here, the Ship Inn has a lovely holiday home right next to the pub. If you stay an extra day in Dundee, then do drive up to Glamis Castle. Or take a drive through the Angus Glens – and have a walk in the hills. Loch Brandy at Glen Clova is not too strenuous and is a wonderful way to spend an afternoon. There are a number of shorter walks in the area for families with younger kids. Afterwards, have a drink by the fire in the Glen Clova Hotel. Day Trip to Highland Perthshire When...

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10 Tips on How to Love Expat Life

Lynn — Tue, 14 Nov 2017 16:38:42 +0000

When I was 19 years old, I left my homeland to live in a foreign country. For a year, I said, to work as an au-pair. Then I met my husband… on my very first day in Germany, but that’s a whole other story! 25 years later, I’m now back in the place where my adventure began, in a small town in Bavaria. In the intervening years, we’ve moved home 8 times, with four international moves and we’ve gathered a whole lot of experience. Here are my top tips on how to love expat life. 1 Set a Time Limit Give it at least a year, if possible longer. You cannot say within six months of moving, “Right, that is IT. I am off home”. This is particularly important if one of the family members is not keen to move. Before you make the decision to move, set a time limit of not less than a year not more than 3 years. If one member of the family is still not settled and happy within that time frame, give a firm promise that you will review the situation at the end of that time and consider a move home. No matter how much you love the place, if your partner or child is seriously unhappy then the whole family will suffer. In return, the person who is reluctant to move has to promise to give it their best shot. 2 Don’t Go Home Too Soon …or too often. I have noticed that the expats who are really miserable here are the ones who fly home the minute school breaks up and stay there for the entire summer holidays. It is tempting, you want to go home and see family but if your life here is all drudgery and no holiday, then you will never learn the sweet side of life as an expat. When we moved to Geneva, we were advised not to go home within the first 6 months, better a year, of arrival in Switzerland. Particularly the children suffer if they go back to their old home town, as the wrench of leaving again is worse than the first time. When you move they are going somewhere exciting and new. Six months down the line they are heading into Phase 2 of the Expat Adjustment Curve. A trip home now will unsettle them, so if you can stay and explore your new country, that would be better. I know it is difficult if Christmas falls into the first six months, but consider taking a trip to somewhere special in your host country over the festive season, eg. if you are in Europe, then a chalet in the Alps or Christmas trip to Disneyland. 3 Expect the Unexpected Try and go into your new life with the expectation of things being different. Sounds obvious but many come to Germany and are surprised at the short opening hours of the shops, or the strange laws on keeping quiet at certain times of the day and night. And that’s NOTHING like the shock you’ll get at the state of Germany the weekend before Ash Wednesday when Fasching or Karneval takes over the country. Be prepared for many surprises over the years and embrace them! 4 Don’t Be Negative A lot of expats (or even tourists) constantly compare the way things are done with their homeland. This is totally normal but try not to fall into the habit of comparing negatively. “In UK we do… that would not happen in UK… “. Just because it is different, doesn’t mean it is worse, and it gets really annoying for your co-workers or local friends. If you do want to point out differences, do it in a positive way. “In UK our schools don’t finish till at least 3 pm so it is great that the kids finish just after lunch” is much better than “OMG, how do you cope with having the kids home at lunchtime already!” 5 Accept the Local Customs They may be strange to you, but they are completely normal to the locals. While we found it amusing/annoying that Swiss neighbours would call the police if someone were to use a leaf blower at the wrong time of the day, that is how things work there. If you accept this instead of ranting about it for days, then you will have a better life. And lower your blood pressure. 6 Learn to Cook Local Food Depending on where you are, sourcing the ingredients for your favourite recipes can be difficult. This is the time to discover the local cuisine. Search online for recipes from the local area, look on the supermarket websites for recipes, ask neighbours and friends. Don’t spend all your time driving around specialty stores, save those recipes for occasional use if you need some home comfort food. In Germany, I rarely baked because I could not find self-raising flour and my cakes never rose with just baking powder, which I have since discovered is due to the difference between German/Swiss baking powder and the US/UK one. Now I know to import baking powder or use German cake recipes. 7 Learn the Language Easier said than done, but even if you speak a few words of the language you will feel more comfortable in your host country, and the locals do appreciate when you attempt to speak their language. If you simply do not have the time/ability/wish to learn the language at least learn how to ask “Do you speak English?” and don’t go into a shop and launch into a long explanation in English. It is rude. If you do speak English with local people, try to tone down your accent but don’t speak LOUDER and S L O W E R. They are not deaf or stupid, they don’t understand English. At the same time, don’t bitch about the locals in English – you may be surprised that they do understand more than they let on! 8 Accept Homesickness … but try not to dwell on it. Have a day every so often where you moan about missing home, eat food from home, have a weep. Then get on with daily life. Allow yourself to feel sad and unhappy and to miss home but then list the good things about the country that you are living in. There ARE good things, even if the nitty-gritty of daily life has convinced you otherwise. Think back to the first day in the country. What did you like? Was there something you did, or a place you visited that you loved? Go back there, and remind yourself of the things that you enjoyed when you first arrived. 9 Get a Dog Ok, perhaps not for everyone, but having a dog to walk gets you out of the house several times a day, and gets you chatting to some of the locals. You will be amazed at how many previously surly and unhelpful people suddenly open up when you have a pooch with you. The dog is also great for families with kids, as they have someone to talk to and cuddle, who doesn’t mind if their fur gets wet from too many tears. 10 Explore and Enjoy Don’t sit at home and mope at the weekend, get out there and explore your host country. There is so much to discover, so many things to do. Get out there and do them. You only live once and since you have the opportunity to see a different country, use it well! Featured Image by Ged Ryan

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What You Need to Know Before Moving Overseas

Lynn — Tue, 09 May 2017 19:00:47 +0000

‘Steve and Mary from Nuneaton are following their dream, of buying and renovating a period property in rural France. The cottage we are showing them needs a bit of work, but we think that with a bit of updating, it could be stunning. Neither of them speak the language, but they came to this area on holiday last year, and fell in love with the natural beauty and the carefree lifestyle. Mary is an artist, and Steve is a graphic designer, and both hope to set up thriving home businesses in France.’ I quite like watching property shows, particularly A Place in the Sun, but usually spend the episode shouting, ‘NO! Don’t do it!’ at the screen. In part, this is due to watching the series on catchup, and knowing that the adorable finca that the couple are buying in 2007 is going to plummet in value within a year of the show being filmed. Having lived abroad, and moved many times, I know a bit about the process, and the pitfalls. So, this is my ultimate post on what you need to know before moving overseas! Learn the Language Yes, it’s a pain, and I must admit that I didn’t do too great with this one when we were in Switzerland, but it is much easier if you speak at least a little before you go. There are a thousand situations that will leave you feeling helpless, if you can’t communicate with the locals. If you are planning on staying long-term, then you will find the acceptance in the community much greater, if you can speak to them in their language (even if not perfectly!) Job seeking is very difficult when you only speak English, and dealing with bureaucracy and various government offices can be almost impossible in some countries. Particularly if you want to set up your own business, the rules and regulations can be incomprehensible even to native speakers. If you intend freelancing, then it is worth speaking to a local accountant, to ensure you don’t have any difficulties with the tax authorities. Understand the Mentality of Locals There are huge differences in the way people approach life in other countries. You wouldn’t think Swiss and Germans would have many clashes of mentality, but they do. The Swiss are all about personal responsibility, and communal thinking – when you live in an apartment block, you aren’t allowed to flush the loo at night, in case you disturb others. While Germans pretty much accept that mowing the lawn at lunchtime, or on Sunday afternoon is inconsiderate of the neighbours, few of them would threaten to call the police, as would happen in Geneva! This doesn’t mean everyone fits in to the ‘mentality’ of the country, but there are general traits that can be recognised. I’m not talking about stereotypes, like Germans loving beer (they mostly do) or all wearing Lederhosen and Dirndls (they don’t, even in Munich). Mentality is a way of thinking, and you can see examples of it everywhere. The Germans’ love for organisation and their attention to detail is the reason they sell so many cars, and have so many good engineers – although some of that is due to their training and education of course! Watching the English is a great book about the way British people interact with each other, their behaviour and habits. Consider Renting for a Year Instead of buying a house immediately, consider renting for a year. This will give you the opportunity to see if you enjoy living abroad, and to engage with the local community. You’ll get a better idea of the normal house prices, and recognise if the sellers have bumped their price up because they think you are rich expats. It will also protect you from financial disaster. We know people who moved to another country, bought a house, which then fell in value due to economic situation, and couldn’t sell or move home. This could still happen later, but at least you will know that you actually like living in the country, and want to stay, in which case you’ll be happy to wait till house prices rise again. Don’t Buy a Ruin – Even One With a View! Starry-eyed couple with dreams of La Dolce Vita, buy a ramshackle old barn from a delighted farmer, who can’t believe that the English paid so much money for a heap of stones. If you are going to start from scratch with a build (see the next section for reasons not to do this!), then buy a plot of land, and don’t overspend on the romantic idea of the history of the building. It was probably a pig stye . I can never quite understand the idea of buying a house that is not (and possibly never was) a home. No roof, or walls tumbling, moss growing in the fireplace. You could build a house in a traditional style, and not have the hassle of clearing the land first! Don’t even do this because of the view from the property. If you are buying in an area where the scenery is spectacular, then the view will be the same from another spot nearby. Renovating or Building a House Housebuilding differs greatly in other countries. My husband can’t believe the ‘papier-mâché’ houses in UK, with timber-frame, being used to more substantially build brick houses in Germany. Windows in Germany are often sold with integrated shutters, like the above photo, to protect from the heat, and to ensure that it is completely dark at night. We also noticed major differences in mentality when renovating our house in UK. ‘Oh, no. You don’t want to spend that much money on an oak floor, just put down laminate’, we were told. The builders thought we were daft to put in such high quality products in an ex-council house. We paid much more for windows, than local firms quoted, as my husband insisted on top quality Austrian windows with shutters . (Internorm, from Energy Source, if you are wondering. I can highly recommend them!) Germans build, or renovate, their houses to the highest standard they can afford, and we’ve found this isn’t compatible with the British ‘that’ll do’ mentality of buying cheap fittings. We were fine, because we understand both mentalities and languages, and were able to insist on what we wanted. If you move to a country where you don’t speak the language, how will you communicate with the builders? It’s not enough to mime where you want the window sill, you need to be able to discuss details. We had a few misunderstandings on our renovation project, and that was all of us speaking the same language! Know the Legal Situation If you are making substantial changes to the house, which will require planning permission, make sure you know exactly what this will involve BEFORE you start. Get expert advice from local architects, and don’t trust just one opinion. We looked at a house here which would have needed an extension, which everyone said, “Oh, I’m sure that will be fine”. I made an appointment with a planning officer of the local council and checked first! Another thing to consider if the ramifications back home. How will your pension be affected by your move? Think of the effect on your credit rating back home, in case you move back. When we moved to UK after years of living abroad, we had no credit history, and found it incredibly difficult to get a mortgage or even a mobile phone contract! How are you intending to pay for the property, and have you considered the effect of a dramatic change in the exchange rate? We have friends who lost a lot of money because their mortgage was in the home country, for the property abroad. When the home currency dropped in value, they were left in negative equity. You should always be in a position that if you had to move back home for any reason, you could do so. My advice would be to accept slightly higher monthly payments if need be, in return for stability of the house price. It Isn’t a Holiday If you are moving abroad, because you love the way of life, that you’ve experienced on holiday, you may be in for a shock. Living in the country is very different. My husband has been coming to Scotland with me for 20 years, but he still experienced culture shock when he moved here. The little things that you don’t mind when you are on holiday (or barely notice) suddenly grow in importance, and in level of annoyance. Maybe it’s the bureaucracy that will annoy you, or the way that people can’t give a straight answer to a simple question. I remember my husband phoning to ask what a customer meant when he said, “Just pop in early afternoon”. In Germany, they arrange appointments at a set time, and then everyone can plan their day accordingly. The British seem to feel that it would be rude to pin someone down to a specific time. One of the best examples of what to do (and perhaps what not to do!) was this Grand Designs episode, of the couple who created an artists retreat in Puglia, Italy. They already spoke the language as they’d been living in Italy for some years, albeit in a different area. They did buy a ruin, but they did most of the work themselves. It is seriously inspiring, but also a great warning for anyone planning to move overseas! https://youtu.be/3imM9c5rASI Featured Image by Santi via Flickr

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The Bombing of Würzburg

Lynn — Mon, 13 Mar 2017 21:39:59 +0000

In my life I have lived in many cities and villages, but the cities I consider “home” are the twin towns of Dundee and Würzburg. I was born and brought up in Dundee, and have recently returned to bring up my children here. I moved to Würzburg in Germany when I was 19 years old, to work as an au-pair for a year. On the day of my arrival, I met the man who I would later marry, but that is a story for another day. Today, I am thinking of the upcoming 70th anniversary of an event that almost destroyed the city, but instead led to its re-birth. While the destruction of Dresden is common knowledge, many people don’t know that other German cities were targeted for destruction in the closing months of the war. One of these cities was Würzburg. When I think of Würzburg on 16th March 1945, I think of women. By this point in the soon-to-be-ended war, most of the men were at the front. The women whose stories I tell today stood on opposite sides of that terrible conflict. The 1943 Casablanca Directive set out a series of priorities for the strategic bombing of Germany by UK and US airforces. The aim was clearly defined: This should have meant a reprieve for Würzburg as the city didn’t fall into any of the criteria for attack Würzburg had no heavy industries, or ammunition factories. The transportation links had been badly damaged in earlier attacks on the railway station and tracks. The city was known as a “Lazarettestadt”, a city of hospitals, and was temporary home to many refugees from other areas of the country. Despite this, in the bomber command of High Wycombe, England, Würzburg was chosen as a “filler target”, for carpet bombing. It was seen as a desirable target, due to the narrow streets, and the timber-framed houses, which would enable fire to spread rapidly. No.5 Bomber Group had experience with this tactic, in Dresden just weeks before. The German Woman – Brigitte Photo of the city walls of Fladungen Brigitte was the grandmother of my husband, and Uroma to my children. She lived for most of her life in a village called Fladungen. My father-in-law would correct me at this point, to remind me that Fladungen is actually a town, as it has ‘Stadtrechte’. Whatever we call it, the place is around 100km from my husband’s hometown of Würzburg, right on the border of what would later become East Germany. Before she met her husband, Brigitte had lived in Würzburg, and worked as a maid for a Jewish family, so she had ties to the city. I never asked why she left the city, and moved further south to work on the border to Austria, but this is where she met her husband. He was Austrian, and after they married, they returned to her hometown of Fladungen to bring up their children. Hans was called up late in the war. He wouldn’t return until many years after the war ended, having walked home from a camp in Russia, where he had been a prisoner. His children did not recognise him when he returned, a skeleton of his former self. He never spoke of his time in Russia. Brigitte rarely spoke of the war. She mentioned the shoe-maker in the village, who was shunned after the Americans came, when the local folk realised that he did indeed still have stocks of leather in his cellar. They’d never forget that their children went to school barefoot, when he complained of having run out of supplies. With Hans still in Russia, Brigitte lived with her four children, in a crooked timber-framed house, close to the mill where my father in law later learned his trade. They survived on the produce that she grew in the garden outside the medieval city walls. Her eldest son was left to care for the younger children when she worked the fields. She told us once about the 16th March 1945, when from her rural home, she watched Würzburg burn. Back then there was no rolling news coverage on TV, no Twitter, no breaking news, but the townsfolk knew that the orange glow in the sky could only mean one thing. The city of Würzburg had been attacked by allied bombers. The English Woman – Phoebe Photo of Aldwych Tube Station, being used as a bomb shelter during the Blitz. In a conversation on Mumsnet many years ago, I mentioned my links to Würzburg, and the night the bombers came. A Mumsnet user told me about her great-aunt Phoebe. Phoebe lived in Henley during the Blitz. This period of heavy bombardment of a number of English cities from September 1940 to May 1941, was designed to break the British spirit, in the same way that the later attacks on German cities were. At times the bombers would overshoot London, and drop their load on Henley. The Blitzkrieg was not as destructive as the later bombings of Dresden, Pforzheim, Hamburg, Kassel and other German cities. Phoebe was an active member of the WRENS, and received an OBE for her services to her country. Despite her patriotism, one of Phoebes worst memories of the war was watching the massed allied bombers fly over, near the end of the war. Alongside the worry and fear for the allied pilots and crew, there was a knowledge and a sorrow of the death and destruction that they would bring to women and children in Germany. Phoebe later told her great-niece, that the women would weep as they watched the planes fly south, thinking of the lives that would soon be changed forever. The German Child – Herta At 5pm on 16th March, 500 bombers took off from Reading, near London. It was a sunny and mild day in Würzburg that day, as the then 8 year old Herta Cleve remembered, “It was a beautiful day, sunshine, wonderful. We hadn’t been to school for a long time, or only just a few times” Herta lived in Semmelstrasse, and was due to take her first communion in the coming month. The first warning was given in Würzburg at 7pm, and a more urgent alarm sounded at 9pm. When the alarm sounded, her mother ushered her down into the cellar of their apartment. “I was wearing knee-length socks, but I didn’t forget my white fur coat and muff, or the little suitcase with the things for communion: a little crown, material for a dress, the nice underwear, the book of prayers, and the silver case with the rosary”. At 21.28 flares fell on the grass of the playing fields of the leafy suburb of Heidingsfeld. Each bomber would fly over these fields, then follow a predetermined course, to drop their load on a different area of the city. 256 high explosive bombs were dropped, to destroy the roofs, windows and doors of the buildings. This was necessary, so that the following 300,000 fire bombs would be most effective. The cellar of the house, in Semmelstrasse, where Herta and her mother were sheltering, was in chaos. “We had beds set up in the cellar for the children, for us to sleep on. But suddenly we were all lying in the corner, on top of each other. Dust, noise, roaring, then it was quiet again. We didn’t know what was happening. There were openings from one cellar to the next, and we heard them break through from the neighbouring house, no. 50. A fire had broken out, and the people were almost suffocating on the smoke. My mother dipped sheets and blankets in water-filled bathtubs, and hung them in front of the opening, but it didn’t help for long. We almost suffocated”. After some time, Herta and her mother attempted to leave the cellar. She looked up at her house, “The curtain fluttered out of the destroyed window, and in that moment caught fire. We couldn’t leave the street. It was a sea of flames. We went back to the cellar”. The firestorm raged at temperatures up to 2000°C, and destroyed 90% of the city centre. 21,062 homes, 35 churches and countless buildings of historical importance were destroyed. It is estimated that in the 25 minutes of the attack, around 5,000 lives were lost. Many of them suffocated in the provisory air-raid shelters of their cellars. It wasn’t until the next morning that Herta and her mother were able to leave the cellar. “My mother had toiled without pause until then, and she comforted me, draped a wet blanket over my head, and said, ‘We will go to Aunt Dora in Mainviertel, where we can sleep and rest'”. The area where her aunt lived, Mainviertel, was still in flames. Herta and her mother were evacuated from Würzburg that day. She didn’t let go of her little suitcase, and in April she celebrated her first communion in a neighbouring village. The Trümmerfrauen Just a few weeks after the bombing of the city, American troops arrived in Würzburg. On 1st April 1945, tanks arrived on the Nikolausberg and the next day the troops were on the river banks, underneath the Festung. The city centre was on the opposite side of the river Main, but the bridges had all been destroyed. The resistance of the Germans was short-lived and by 6th April, the US troops had taken the city, and installed an interim Bürgermeister (Mayor), who declared, “Würzburg ist nicht tot, Würzburg muss leben, Würzburg muss neu erstehen!” “Würzburg is not dead, Würzburg must live, Würzburg must rise again!” While the swift intervention by US Monument Officer John D. Skilton saved the famous frescos of the Residenz, it was down to the inhabitants of the city to clear the rubble and rebuild. With so many men still not returned from the front, the women of Würzburg were recruited to assist with this work. In July 1945, 36,845 people were still registered in the city of Würzburg: 22,407 women und 14,438 men. The German word for ‘rubble’ is ‘Trümmer’, and this was the name given to the men and women who helped to clear the rubble and start the rebuilding process. At first this was done on a voluntary basis, later it became compulsory, as only those who assisted were given food rations. In time, the Trümmerfrauen would return to their traditional roles, as private companies took over the huge task. It wasn’t until 1964 that the last of the 2.5 million cubic meters of rubble was cleared. It would take until the 1990s until the last ruin was replaced. Würzburg Today Photo Credits: Würzburg, before 1945, after 16th March, now When strolling the streets of the city, there are very few signs of the devastation of the 16th March 1945. Occasionally, one might come across a tumbledown wall, but most of the buildings were rebuilt, albeit not always historically reconstructed. In the same way, lives were rebuilt, but they were never the same as before the war. My husband told me recently, that many felt that the night that turned Würzburg into the ‘Grab am Main’, the Grave on the River Main, was a just punishment for the sins of their country. Whether we can honestly say that the killing of innocents is ever truly justified, the guilt and shame of the Germans was, and is, deeply felt. The church bells will sound in Würzburg, on the 16th March this year, as they always do, between 9.20 to 9.40pm, the duration of the air raid. This blog post does not attempt to justify, or lessen the horrific crimes that went before. Sadly, there exists a minority of right-wing activists, who attempt to use the deaths of innocents to rewrite history, both within and outwith Germany, but these must be firmly rebutted. There can be no drawing up of a balance sheet, with the lives of the victims of the Nazis on one side, and the lives of the victims of the strategic bombings on the other. There is no room for blame or pointing of fingers. This year, on the 70th anniversary of the Dresden bombings, a delegation from the city of Coventry travelled to Germany. These two cities are twinned, and...

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The Ultimate Expat Family To-Do List

Lynn — Tue, 02 Aug 2016 12:32:48 +0000

Moving house is said to be one of the most stressful times of life. Moving overseas is even more stressful. Moving overseas with a family … let’s just say there will be tears, recriminations, doubts, regrets and the mother of all to-do lists. With the experience I’ve gained over the years, I’ve put together the ultimate expat family to-do list. For the purpose of this list, I’m going to assume that you’ve made the decision to move, you (or your company) have organised working visas, and that you are not working with a relocation specialist. It’s definitely worth asking if your employer would consider paying for this service, as it helps employees settle into their new life quicker, and means they are less distracted by niggling bureaucracy. The more that you arrange and research before you leave, the easier the first weeks will be. When you arrive, you will have to navigate a new neighbourhood, settle into your new home and get the kids used to their new school. Spend the evenings before you move googling for information, make a list and keep it somewhere safe. It’s not a bad idea to store your list on your phone so that you can always access it. Arrange a House-Hunting Trip Depending on the age of your children, you may prefer to do this without them. Older kids may want more of a say in the choice of new home, but dragging little ones around an unfamiliar city isn’t fun, and will slow you down. A great way to involve kids back home is to arrange a video call (via FaceTime or Skype) as you view a house. Or video the tour, and send it to them using hotel wifi. If you can, speak to some local expats, and ask for opinions on city districts. Try websites such as Mumsnet or ExpatChild (Facebook group here), or search for expat parenting Facebook groups in the country/city you are moving to. Consider commuting distances when looking for a home, particularly in cities that are known for traffic gridlock. You may need to compromise here, with regards to decent living area vs good school vs reasonable commute. In my experience, the most important of these three is the school, followed by the city district. We had cross-cultural training before our move to Geneva, and the trainer told us that the main reason for early repatriation from an overseas assignment was when the ‘Trailing Spouse’ and / or the kids were unhappy. (Yes, that really is a term that is used for the non-working spouse!) It really is worth ensuring that the person who will be spending most time at home is happy with the location of the house. Some people move into temporary accommodation for a couple of months when they arrive in the country, to give themselves more time to search for a home. From my experience, this simply prolongs the unsettled period and makes it more difficult to settle in. The question of buying or renting is one that comes up often. The UK has a high percentage of homeowners, and often Brits want to buy a home when they go abroad. In many EU countries, renting a house is more common, and this may be a better option, particularly for a temporary assignment. Even if you plan to stay longer, consider the implications and costs involved in purchasing an overseas property. If you don’t like living abroad, will you be able to sell the property? A drop in the exchange rate can be devastating if the property costs (mortgage, utilities etc) are in a currency different to your salary. Schools and Childcare Perhaps more important for the happiness of the family is the choice of school and/or childcare. Again, expat groups on Facebook or other websites can be amazingly helpful here. Some employers will pay for international school, or for a school in the language of your home country. For shorter assignments, this makes it easier for the kids to re-integrate when you move back home. If you intend to stay for a longer period of time, you may prefer to send the children to a local school. Before you arrange the house-hunting trip, phone or email a couple of schools and ask if you can visit when you are there. Make a list of things that are important to you, so that you can ask about them, e.g. school times, pastoral care, qualifications, transport, special needs provisions. Also ensure that your preferred school is currently accepting new pupils, as some of the better schools may be over-subscribed. If your child has additional needs, try and speak to some locals or expats to find out about provisions, both with regard to schooling and health care. An assessment from your home country may not be considered valid in the new country, so you might have to organise a new one. If both parents intend to work, start to research childcare options. Is there state childcare provision, and will you be eligible? A childminder, with a small group of cohorts, may be preferable for a young child, but the opportunities for learning a new language might be better in a nursery / kindergarten setting. Ask the school for an interim report, if you are moving in the middle of a school year. And find out about school uniform, and where to buy it. Wifi and Mobile Phones When you head off on the house-hunting trip, ensure that your mobile phone contract doesn’t have extortionate roaming charges for calling home. It might be cheaper to take an unlocked phone with you and buy a local SIM card. After you have signed the rental contract, go into the local telecommunications shop and inquire about signing up for phone/mobile/wifi services. Depending on the country, this may be possible before you move. Often it can take a couple of weeks before the wifi is connected, so if you can do this in advance of your arrival, it is a great advantage. This also means that when you arrive with the kids, you won’t spend weeks hearing ‘but WHY don’t we have internet yet?!!’, and you can unpack in peace as they watch YouTube videos or chat with friends back home on Snapchat. New regulation within the EU has cracked down on roaming charges, making it less expensive to use your mobile phone in other EU countries. Check that your new contract enables you to use your minutes/data when you visit home or other countries. Some contracts include cheap calls to specific countries – in times of internet calling, this is no longer quite as important but can be handy to have. Various apps enable you to stay in touch with friends and family back home, using your mobile data allowance or wifi to message or even call home. Apple gadget users can use FaceTime and iMessage; to chat or phone with those on Android, the app Whatsapp is incredibly useful – or even Facebook messenger. Apps and social media services such as Instagram and Snapchat are a great way for kids to keep in touch with friends back home. Set them up before they leave, so they have time to exchange details with friends. Ensure they know not to use normal text messaging, otherwise they and their friends could run up a hefty phone bill! Healthcare Ensure that you have health insurance set up – either via your employer or private insurance. Most employers will advise on this. Do you need any vaccinations before you go? Take vaccination records for the kids with you, as some schools won’t accept kids without proof that they are vaccinated. If you take regular medication, can you import this into the country, and purchase it (or an equivalent) when you move? Don’t forget birth control. This is a good time to have last check-ups, so schedule general health check-up, dental/orthodontist, gynae, dermatologist etc. If one of the family has specific health issues, ask for copies of their notes. If your child wears dental braces, check if the spare parts are available in the new country (we were advised to wait till we moved to have orthodontics fitted for this reason). Not strictly ‘health’ but go to the hairdresser and get a good cut before you leave, as it might take a while before you find one in the new place. Take photos of the cut and colour now, so that you can show your new hairdresser, particularly if there may be a language barrier. There is only one thing worse than having an ill child in a foreign country, and that is having an ill child in a foreign country and having no idea where to go for help. You don’t want to be holding an ice pack to a bumped head with one hand, while frantically googling to find the closest ER with the other hand. Once you know where you will be living, find out the location of a hospital with emergency pediatric care. In some places, this may be different from the regular ER. Ask around to find medical practitioners who speak your language – doctor, dentist, optician, pediatrician… or any other specialist you or your family require. Pets Check if there are any quarantine restrictions or any health checks required before importing your pet. Ensure that your pet has the required vaccinations, e.g. rabies shots. Ask around to find a vet who speaks your language and research where to buy food, bedding, and any other requirements. Take enough food for the first weeks, so that you don’t have to rush around on arrival to find similar food. Depending on where you are moving to, you might find that the food you give your pet at home isn’t available there. If not, consider switching to the new food in the weeks before you leave home, especially if you have a fussy eater. Banking and Bureaucracy You may want to keep your bank account open in your home country. Be aware that if you don’t use your accounts at home, you may find that on your return, your credit history has been badly affected. You may want to open a local bank account (assuming this is possible) for local costs. In some countries, acceptance of credit cards is limited, so having a local debit card will be much easier. Particularly Americans have to get used to paying for everything in cash in some European countries, where it’s less common to pay by card. Cancel direct debits and standing orders, and any subscriptions e.g. print and online media, shopping, utilities, rental payments, house insurance, car tax and insurance… Some subscriptions have a longer cancellation period, so do this as soon as you can. Change your address – banks, pension/national insurance/health insurance, tax office. If you will rent out your home while you are away, decide if you wish to appoint a rental agent. Consider if there will be any tax implications in the host country if you have income from rental property. It may be advantageous to contact a tax advisor with experience of expat tax affairs. Ensure you inform your bank and insurance company that you will be renting your home as failure to do this may break the terms of your contract. Make a will, if you haven’t already. Get legal advice if you have property and assets in more than one country. Appoint legal guardians for your kids. Make copies of all important documents – the best option for this is to scan them and save them on an external hard-drive or cloud-based drive. Check renewal dates for passports – it might be better to renew a year early than have the hassle while abroad. Some countries allow passport renewal by post, others require a visit to the embassy or consulate. Find out about family allowance payments, and whether you can claim this locally (as is the case when moving within the EU). Check with...

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Dress Rules for Women over 40

Lynn — Mon, 01 Aug 2016 11:30:41 +0000

Another summer, another list of rules for women on what they should and shouldn’t wear. From the ‘how to get a bikini body’ articles (top tip – buy a bikini, put it on your body, done!) to this incredibly stupid list of rules for women over 40 years. Here are my dress rules for women over 40. 1. Problem Zones I try to hide my problem zones. This is generally done by throwing a dish towel over the un-washed dinner dishes or shoving the ironing basket into a cupboard when visitors are due. If you have bits of your body that you don’t particularly like (and let’s be honest, most of us do) treat them the same way. Hide them if you want to and don’t if you don’t. Don’t feel obliged to shield innocent children from the sight of your wobbly arms, but if it makes you feel more confident to cover them up, go for it. 2. Colours Ok, this is actual proper tip, and not a snarky jab at the article that annoyed me. If you can afford it, go to a colour expert person. If you can’t, then have a look online, and get a friend to help work out which colours suit you best. I always hated purple so it was a revelation when a colour consultant told me that it was my best colour. I took the leap and tried out some lilac and purple-blue shades, and found that I actually loved them. It doesn’t mean that I only wear these colours, but if I’m looking for something special for an event, I bear it in mind. At the same time, ignore anyone who tells you that women over 40 can’t wear black or white, or that a certain shade of hair colour is ageing. If you like a colour, wear it. If you like ALL THE COLOURS, wear them. 3. Shoes You can’t beat a comfy pair of sneakers with a decent foot support and room for your toes to move. Unless of course, you adore wearing high heels and strappy sandals, in which case wear them instead. I can’t see any reason why anyone should change their choice of shoes because they’ve passed an arbitrary age milestone. I do tend to pay a bit more for shoes now than I used to, because I like comfort but that’s personal preference, not a rule to be followed. Ok, I might make an exception for jellies, which are probably best left to toddlers and teenagers, but they are basically just uncomfortable Crocs, and what’s the point in that?! 4. Make-Up If you are over 40, you’ve spent the last 20 years being scared witless about getting OLD and having WRINKLES by cosmetic companies desperate to sell their products. It’s time to face the truth – no cream or potion can stop the passage of time. It comes down to genetics and too much exposure to sunlight but who the hell wants to live in the shadows? Pick a day-cream that you like and that has a SPF, smother it on in the morning and forget it. There are women who love make-up and those who hate it, and a whole lot of us in the middle who sometimes make an effort and sometimes don’t bother. A lot is made about Barbara Cartland’s fake eyelashes and heavy make-up, but did you know that she was also an aviation pioneer? What we smear on our face has nothing to do with what is in our heads. We are not one-dimensional! 5. Hair When I was in my twenties, a friend said that when she reached 30 years, she’d cut her hair short. Where did this idea come from that women over a certain age aren’t allowed to have long hair? Who makes these rules?! And since awesome women like Julianne Moore and Mary Beard are happy to ignore them, I’m going to follow their lead. I could go on, but frankly I’m bored already, and I’m sure you are too. The bottom line is that for everyone who might sniff at inappropriate attire worn by an 40+ woman, there are plenty more who applaud her confidence and give-no-fucks attitude. From the time we are teenagers, women’s bodies and what they put on them are policed. First our skirts are too short and distracting to school pupils and creepy teachers, then they are too long and unflattering. Our hair should be natural until we start to go grey, then we should dye it, but only accepted colours not red or GOD FORBID purple. We are wearing too much make-up, except when we are ‘caked’ or have ‘put it on with a trowel’, but don’t go out without make-up as that would be ‘unkempt’. I’m calling bullshit on all lists of rules, including this one. These are my thoughts on the topic, and everyone has their own opinion. Treat these lists like a tin of Quality Street that your auntie gave you for Christmas. Take the ones you like out of the tin before passing it on to someone else. Perhaps the best rule to have is this one, which a friend shared this morning on Twitter. Featured Image by Alisa Anton/Unsplash

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Inspiring Women – Dum Spiro Spero

Lynn — Sat, 16 Jul 2016 19:55:37 +0000

“While I breathe, I hope” This morning Rebecca from Artemis Mindset asked a question on her Facebook Group. Which women inspire you? Inspirational … it’s a word that gets thrown around a lot when it comes to women. To inspire someone is to ‘ exert an animating, enlivening, or exalting influence on‘ them. Millie Slavidou breaks down the word inspire: in = Latin prefix meaning ‘in’. spire = from Latin spirare meaning ‘breathe’. And suggests that we ‘think of it as a breathing in of ideas, or atmosphere, a filling with the air of imagination’. This was a hard list to write because I was conscious of the women who would not be included. What criteria do I use when compiling such a list? The women who offer love, support and advice in my daily life are too many to mention and deserve my thanks and appreciation. I struggled for hours, before realising that there are a couple of types of women who inspire me. The Women Who Break the Mould Women who go beyond their background and upbringing, ignoring the dictates of their society, refusing to be silenced, going their own way. We will never hear the stories of many of these women, but they are all around us. Women like my husband’s grandmother Brigitte, who left her remote village to work in a city, where she recalled seeing Kaiser Wilhelm parade through the streets. She travelled further afield, to the Alpen town of Kitzbuhel, on the border to Austria, where she met her husband. Returning to her home village, she raised her children during a dark period in Germany’s history. In the late 1950s, her two middle children announced they wished to visit America. Brigitte shocked her neighbours by selling a pig to raise the money for this youthful folly. By the time I met her, she was a widow who refused to abandon her rickety old house, without central heating or even an electric boiler. Defying her children, she would climb the wooden ladder to the loft in the barn to fetch wood for the stove. A decade later, she admitted that she could no longer live alone, and moved in with my in-laws for her final years. She died just days after meeting my newborn son for the first time. As he was gently laid into her arms, she sighed, ‘At last, he’s here’. Other women who broke the mould include Sophia Duleep Singh, whose life I’ve been reading about in Anita Anand’s excellent biography. The Bugatti Queen, Helle Nice is another woman, who forged her own path. Bessie Coleman grew up without any of the advantages of Sophia but went on to become the first African-American female aviator. Some women are less well known, such as Victoria Drummond or Florence Mills, both of whom feature in the Jump! Books #12Women series. The Women who Move the Debate Politicians are tricky women to find inspiring, because while we may admire their achievements, we might not admire or share their politics and their policy focus. . Angela Merkel’s quiet determination and humanity is a shining light in the current refugee crisis. If you get the chance, watch The Making of Merkel by Andrew Marr. The following scene from the Andrew Marr documentary is pivotal to understanding Merkel. Her fellow minister Norbert Blüm pushes and patronises the woman they called ‘Kohl’s Mädchen’ (Chancellor Kohl’s girl), trying to make her sit down. She smiles and tries to escape, then sits before immediately jumping up again. The steel beneath the polite smiles and deference shows for a moment. Nobody puts Baby in a corner – and she doesn’t rely on anyone else to defend her. Female politicians are harshly judged, regardless of their place on the political spectrum, as are all women who put themselves in the public eye. I don’t share Nicola Sturgeon‘s aims for our country, but I greatly admire her as a woman and role model for girls. Sheryl Sandberg implores us to lean in, Brene Brown dares us to be vulnerable and courageous, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie encourages us to look beyond our cultural borders, and says we should all be feminists, while Beyonce uses Adichie’s words to bring feminism to young girls. [pullquote align=”full” cite=”Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=”12″]We teach girls to shrink themselves to make themselves smaller. We say to girls, ‘You can have ambition but not too much. You should aim to be successful but not too successful otherwise you will threaten the man.’ Because I am female I am expected to aspire to marriage. I am expected to make my life choices always keeping in mind that marriage is the most important. A marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support, but why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage and we don’t teach boys the same? We raise girls to see each other as competitors, not for jobs or for accomplishments, which I think can be a good thing, but for the attention of men. We teach girls that they can not be sexual beings in the way that boys are. Feminist: A person who believes in the social, political and economic equality of the sexes.[/pullquote] The Women Who Quietly Change the World In Caitlin Moran’s column How to Start and Win an Argument Online, she talks about the ‘whataboutery’ of internet discussions. You know the type of person. The one when you post about doing x, will ask ‘but what about…’. She quite rightly points out that everyone specialises in their own area of interest and expertise. We didn’t ask Ghandi to tackle sex-trafficking, FGM, climate control and the World Cup while he was decolonising India. [pullquote align=”full” cite=”Caitlin Moran” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]The future is a communal effort, like a patchwork quilt. Everyone interested in forming our society takes a square each – a square they have chosen according to their interests, knowledge and ability – and sews it, then we join them together to make a fabulous quilt. That’s how things get done.[/pullquote] There are women out there changing the world, tiny baby steps at a time. They aren’t as visible as Angela Merkel or Beyonce, but their small contribution is just as worthy, and just as inspiring as the women who get all the press coverage. My aunt’s name isn’t really Gabby but this is how she’s known to all her friends. I assume it was one of her elder brothers who gave her the nickname on account of her ‘gift of the gab’. My family has always been a matriarchal one, with strong women at the helm. Gabby is one of them. She’s a wonderfully supportive mother and grandmother. Over the years, Gabby supported many women, particularly those from immigration backgrounds, working for a charity as a business support advisor to help women set up their own businesses. Gabby is a take-no-nonsense person, but not a no-compromise one. She balances her directness with a kindness that comes from the heart and a willingness to listen to the cultural experiences of others. A glance through my Twitter feed shows the work of countless women, sewing their own square of the quilt, some of them quite literally, such as the Woolly Hugs gang, who make blankets for terminally ill children and bereaved families. The LetToysBeToys campaign takes retailers to task for selling gendered products to children. Jo Costello and Louise Pennington, created the Everyday Victim Blaming campaign, to highlight instances of victim-blaming, and to support abused women. Karen Ingala Smith has taken on the terribly distressing cause of putting a name and a story to the women killed in the UK as a result of male violence with her Counting Dead Women campaign. Samantha Asumadu created the Media Diversified campaign, which aims to promote the work of people of colour, who are incredibly underrepresented in the press and literature. Amber Kirk-Ford is a young writer and blogger, who draws attention to YA books and writers on her MileLongBookshelf, and has spoken honestly and openly about her struggles with anxiety. Leyla Hussein, Nimco Ali and Sainab Abdi have faced abuse for demanding an end to FGM, with their campaign Daughters of Eve. The teams of ScienceGrrl and Stemettes work to further women and girls in STEM careers. All of these women work tirelessly for their cause, often for little or no financial compensation, in addition to working and/or bringing up their children. In Amber’s case, while studying for her GCSE and A-level exams. Talk about inspiring! Who inspires you?

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Letting Go

Lynn — Tue, 24 May 2016 12:09:31 +0000

You roll your eyes and I bite my tongue. It’s normal, I tell myself. She’s a teenager. She needs to detach. Still, it hurts my heart. ‘You may give them your love but not your thoughts’ I was the centre of your world. Your rock. Your oracle. You looked to me for answers. And now your gaze has turned outward. Others inform you. YouTubers and Instagrammers, school friends and even teachers are your mentors. You search google and YouTube for advice, instead of asking me. It’s a part of growing up. She has to find her own way. I’m almost convinced. ‘You may house their bodies but not their souls’ I’ve set the foundations, given you the basic skills to build your life and now I must trust you to use these tools well and create your own masterpiece. Opening my arms, I watch you soar. If you’d look behind, you’d see me still standing with arms outstretched. Ready to catch you, should you fall. You don’t. You aim for the stars. Fly safe, I whisper. I love you. (Quotes from Kahlil Gibran) If you have a teenager who makes you feel this way, do read this piece by Samantha Gouldson on the neuroscience of the teenage brain. It really helped me to accept that my daughter’s moods are normal, and just part of growing up.

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The Problem with “As a Mother…”

Lynn — Sun, 10 Jan 2016 11:18:19 +0000

When a sentence begins with ‘As a mother…’, it’s generally a bad sign. This rarely heralds an insightful observation, as Andrea Leadsom demonstrated. The discussion will continue around the political wrangling, but I wanted to pause for a moment and consider the idea that motherhood grants a woman anything other than the ability to cook meals one-handed while holding a wailing baby. As a Mother… I’ve changed. It would be impossible not to. The focus of my life has shifted, and the opinions and feelings of others need to be taken into consideration. I’m sure this is true for most parents, not just mothers. As a mother, I became aware of different aspects of life that I hadn’t considered. When my kids were babies, I noticed that dropped kerbs and accessible buses meant that I could get around the town easier. It made me pause and consider that the inconvenience of using a pram or buggy was a temporary one, unlike those in wheelchairs, who are often prevented from using a bus because the buggy space is full. As my children grew, their needs changed. From searching for restaurants with bottle-warming and baby-change facilities to ones with a play area or colouring books, to ones with free wifi as the kids reached their teens. I noticed the differences in pre-school child-care between UK and Germany where we lived when the kids were little, and became aware of the high costs that were a burden to many families in UK. They started school and I became more interested in the education systems in the countries in which we lived. The way in which the world treated my daughter in comparison to my son affected me and encouraged me to become more feminist, more politically active. In the coming years, I’ll take more of an interest in further education, colleges, apprenticeships. We are already starting to think about paying for the college years, how to enable our kids to buy property, giving them a good start in life. Parenting is not a science. Sure, there are studies about breastfeeding, attachment parenting, education systems and more, but there is no ‘right’ way to parent children because every child has different needs. My experiences have given me insights into many aspects of life. Maternity provisions, child-friendly products and services, child-care and education, housing requirements for families, feminism… but this is all from my perspective, as a educated white woman with a comfortable home life and loving family. Other parents will have taken a very different view on life, based on their experiences. And others base their world-view on experiences in other walks of life. I can’t speak with authority on what it is like to work as an academic or a researcher. I don’t know what it feels like to be so poor that you don’t know how to get through the week. As much as I can empathise with the struggles and support the rights of people of colour, I can’t walk in their shoes. Why should my life experiences be any more valuable just because I am a mother? The insights gained as a mother shaped my opinions; they don’t make my opinions any more valid than those of the next person. And they certainly don’t make me more suited for political office than a childless person. Featured Image by Priscilla Westra/Unsplash

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