Sara Duggan | Squidoo | Writer | Christian | Mom Blogger | Homeschool

Love of My Life

2013-04-17T23:58:00.001-07:00

Love of My Life
19 years ago today I was barefoot on the grass
My crochet wedding dress on
Youth and naivety

You were my hippie
I was your sunshine
Together we were going to Love the world

Obstacles were placed on our path
Sadness, Grief, and Regret

Optimistic you told me not to worry
Live today to the fullest you said

You make me better
You keep me sane
You keep me alive

You are the rainbow I need
Love of My Life

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Squidoo Updates: Valentine's Week

2013-02-18T17:05:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know it's the 18th and not the 14th or the week of Valentine's but this Squidoo update is specific to Valentine's so that is what I titled it.

I'm joining Marsha's Spot for the New Lens and Hop linky. Each Thursday she picks a topic and we share a new Squidoo lens (article) about the topic. This week doesn't really have a theme it just happens to fall on Valentine's day.

Marsha talks about her latest lens, a Music Review, which was put in holding. For those not familiar with Squidoo, it is an article directory where you can write articles for free. Kind of like building a website for free but with one single page.

Anyway, she wrote a music review and her lens (article) got tagged for duplicate content. This means that something in her article was found somewhere else online. For this particular review she had to use content provided by someone else.

David Castillo via http://freedigitalphotos.net

I started to do reviews for blog communities at the end of last year but decided against it because much of what they wanted me to add to the blog was duplicate content. They had everyone post the same article about the product or service. Google doesn't like this.

I really don't know what do. Most companies make a generic post for all blogger partners to share - Writing 50 to 100 different and unique articles is just ridiculous. Instead of giving a blanket article or post I think it would be best if they gave you a topic to write about. This would solve the unique content dilemma. (Squidoo's thoughts on duplicate content)

How to Check for Duplicate Content

You can check for duplicate content by copying a sentence or two, adding quotes, and search on Google. Copyscape.com is another place to check. (got this from GreekGeek's article about Google Panda Updates and how they affect Squidoo and Hubpage authors)

My Squidoo Lens to Share

My latest lens (article) talks about why I love writing for Squidoo.

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Crocheting my Life Back Update 1

2013-02-18T16:20:00.001-08:00

Wow, Talk about a week of ill planning - as far as this new project is concerned I flopped. I had it in my head to do this. To really concentrate on being mindful about my body's signals for eating but the little girl in me just kicked it to the curb. (stats on the bottom of the post)

I did it 'my way'. I purposefully overate. I ignored my body's sign for hunger and ate anyway. Oh how I want to conquer this but wanting something and doing it are two different things right?

I need a plan. I know that when writing I have a plan of action I work through it and check off things that need to be done. This helps me complete a project.

I guess the good thing is I didn't gain weight. I'm still the same on the scale. It doesn't help because I know the truth - my heart is still 'sick'.

Plan For Next Week:

I will print out the Spirit Calendar which comes with the program I'm doing
Schedule time for watching the video for the program
Study/Pray First thing in the morning. Lately I've been starting the day out with work not God.

I'll report to you again next week to see if I followed through with my intentions.

Want to join Cris in this project? You can cater it to what you want in your life - it doesn't have to be weight loss - that is just my particular 'demon'. Read Cris's latest post.

CMLB Update 1:

I'll post each week and link up with Cris's blog
I'll share how many pounds lost as well as how many hearts made
Was I successful in listening to my stomach's call for hunger
What I will do next week to listen better

Statistics:

Beginning Weight: 327 lbs
Weekly Weight Loss/Weight Gain: 0/0
Total Weight Loss/Weight Gain: 0/0
Hearts Allowed: 0/0
Hearts Made: 0/0

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{Writing Prompt} If Time Stopped

2013-02-11T04:44:00.001-08:00

Today I'm linking up with Ellen Stumbo for the Writing Prompt. Won't you join us?

If time stopped right now I would be rather sad. I'm up late, thinking way too much and my boys, growing ever so fast are asleep along with the dad.

Not sure what we'd do - would I go wake them - they'd probably tell me to get some sleep and say that I'm crazy.

anekoho via http://freedigitalphotos.net

Crazy is the word that everyone likes to use when they describe me. It's no wonder that they are not quick to believe me when I tell them that time stopped.

My youngest, my sweet little boy - not so little - is challenging everything his dad and I ever taught him. I understand his need to separate from us to form his own ideas but this process is hard. It's painful. It's sad.

I would hope that once things settled down that they would realize that time stopped and that we had time to talk, to enjoy each others company. No more errands, no more school (I'm sure they will be thrilled) and no more doctor's appointments.

If time stood still would it heal? Could it heal? Would I be able to love on my boys enough for them to remember what it was like before the job loss, the home loss, the struggling to make even the minutest ends meet? Would they remember they used to laugh and not worry?

Right now it's quiet. It's easy to get carried away with selfish thoughts and what ifs.

I'd rather choose when time stopped. I'd want it to be a perfect joyous family moment. One where we were all in a nice comfortable home, spending time just hanging out together, laughing, talking, and not worrying.

The eldest son wouldn't worry about getting into college and fears of the unknowns of adulthood would vanish.

The youngest wouldn't worry about talking to girls or about the existence of God.

My husband wouldn't worry about finding a job or providing for his family.

I wouldn't worry about all of them.

Maybe if time stood still we could just BE. Be in the now. Be in the moment of here.

A couple of moments I would love to freeze:

The moment I held my boys for the first time
The moment I said I Do to my husband
The moment I hiked up to Vernal Falls for the first time by myself
The moment both boys said Mama and I love you
The moment I first held my husbands hand
The first step
My first kiss
When I knew I was in love
When Eldest son held Youngest son in his arms for the first time
When both boys thought they could do anything - no limits, no fears,
Hearing my husband play his guitar
Staring into my husbands eyes
Singing "Silent Night" to my boys
Holding a sleeping baby close to my heart

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Crocheting My Life Back Introduction

2013-02-11T03:54:00.001-08:00

Crochet with Cris started a crochet project where she is crocheting a granny square for each pound she loses.

I decided to join her this year in this. Instead of a granny square afghan I'll be crocheting hearts for each pound down.

My weight loss history is an insane nightmare. I don't try anymore because frankly if my heart isn't changed - meaning if I still use food to cope with stress and chaos in my life - I will never permanently lose weight.

I chose hearts because in my process I will be changing my heart attitude about weight. Crocheting helped me heal or fix my mind so I'm hoping it can be the means to heal my body.

My goal in this project is to retrain myself to listen to my stomach. I want to be able to listen to when my stomach is calling for food and when it is full.

Right now I do not care and eat whenever I feel like it - even when I'm sick. I eat out of hate for myself. If I am feeling particularly loathsome, I'll stuff food down until the pain goes away. It is usually carbohydrates but it really doesn't matter what it is - if I can eat it, I will.

To find out more about Cris's journey read her introduction post.

How this will work for me:

I'll post each week and link up with Cris's blog
I'll share how many pounds lost as well as how many hearts made
Was I successful in listening to my stomach's call for hunger
What I will do next week to listen better

Statistics:

Beginning Weight: 327 lbs
Weekly Weight Loss/Weight Gain: 0
Total Weight Loss/Weight Gain: 0
Hearts Allowed: 0
Hearts Made: 0

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{Movie Review} The Guardian, a Coast Guard Movie

2013-02-01T11:29:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I got my hook and yarn out to work on a project. Usually I turn the boob tube aka television on for background noise. I was browsing the stations and didn't find anything that seemed interesting. A movie called The Guardian came on Spike so thought I'd settle on that as it starred Kevin Costner.

I was not really into it as it was a training type of movie. You know the type, you follow students as they train for this job or that job. This was for the coast guard.

There I was sitting on the couch minding my own business, crocheting my scarf when out of the corner of my eye Kevin starts berating this guy for not being able to stay firm under pressure. That's when things started getting a little interesting for me. I was now actively watching this movie.

When you are in the coast guard you have to expect that people will panic and you certainly can't be panicking along with them right?

Ashton Kutcher takes the guy out for a beer where they 'of course' end up in a bar fight. It was this experience that 'toughened' the guy who panicked in the water.

I'm babbling.

Before I knew it I was crying. Ashton Kutcher finally graduated from the school and was a full fledged coast guard rescue swimmer. Totally disliked the scene where his girlfriend said 'we knew this was casual' - what? You can see that he loves her. How can it just end like that?

Eventually a job comes where Kevin's character ends up freezing on the job so wasn't able to save a guy - Ashton picks up the slack but it was this incident that makes Kevin quit being a rescue swimmer after years on the job.

Not going to tell you the end - but I was balling my eyes out. My husband walked into the room and the movie caught his eye too. He's not a television watcher. (not a big one anyway) He found a few tears in his eyes too. He told me he was taken off guard.

Here's the song they played at the end of the movie - by this time I had soaked many tissues and well, my crochet project was no longer the center of my attention.

p.s. You gotta watch the movie to find out what happened to Ashton and his girl and did Kevin really quit?

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{Bloggy Moms} I Got A Little Carried Away

2013-01-30T04:58:00.000-08:00

Completed Mr. Biki the Buffalo

Writing today with Bloggy Moms - Join in the Blog Dare Writing Prompt fun.

Over the weekend I found a little craft to do on Pinterest - you know how that is. As I was making the cute little animal cards by WeeSociety.com, I envisioned all sorts of animals. I could see a cat, a dog, a sock monkey and even a little fox.

I tried to get the boys involved but at 12 and 17 they weren't too thrilled at helping me.

I took out my construction paper, scissors, glue stick and the templates. (you can download them at the site above)

Getting Ready to Trace onto Construction Paper

Already to be put together - Let's breathe some life into him

The same process had to be repeated for each little character - Kate the Koala, Riley the Raccoon, and Yolanda the Yeti. The heart pictured above was glued to the inside of each card and I added a little silly valentine note.

I Love You (that brown thing is his tongue)

Back of the Card

I glued the name of each character to the back of the card just so I would remember them.

Riley the Raccoon

Inside reads: 1 Rockin' Raccoon

Kate the Koala

Inside Reads: I've Koala'n for You

Yolanda the Yeti

Inside Reads: I Love you Yeti Much

Finally my little Guy - the Fox. Not so sure what to name him so I thought I'd ask you. What should Mr. Foxes name be? Does he look like a dog to you?

Mr. Fox without a name

Inside Reads: Foxy Mama

I did get a wee carried away with these cards. Now, who will I give them too? My boys are way too sophisticated (old) for valentine's although they don't mind the candy so much. I might just keep them for myself.

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{Writing Promp} Walking In His Shoes

2013-01-28T12:29:00.001-08:00

image: chrissroll http://freedigitalphotos.net

The following is a post writing with the writing prompt "Walking in his shoes" via Ellen Stumbo's linky.

My life is filled with stumbling blocks, some I put in my way, others were put there by strangers or family members. The one thing I keep in mind is that nothing matters except for love.

I want to live my life following Jesus. Jesus is Love for me. He walked in love. He cared for everyone even those who spat in his face.

Walking in his shoes would mean that I take my time to live in the moment - to breath in the smiles of every person I pass on the street.

Walking in his shoes means that I will give up selfish gain in order to meet your needs.

Holding on to children and telling the adults who think 'they are in the way' and should be 'quiet' would be me, walking in his shoes.

Touching the untouchables, loving them, caring for them despite my fear and despite my natural tendency to turn away would be walking in his shoes.

I tend to think way too much on ME. I feel like I suffer when in fact I suffer very little if at all.

Walking in Jesus' shoes means being beat up, being lied about, being kicked, teased, disrespected, accused of being a devil and a cheat. It means wearing a crown of thorns and being accused of blasphemy yet loving anyway.

Walking in his shoes means that I will know who I am. I am a child of the living God. Someone who knows her weaknesses, admits to them, and spends the necessary time in prayer seeking the strength to make it through the next moment.

Walking in his shoes means that even though what I have to do is painful and goes against everything I think 'should be' I do it anyway because it is right.

Walking in his shoes means

Doing what it takes

speaking up for those who need it most

loving when I don't feel like it

keeping my tongue when I want to yell and scream

being patient with my son after telling him for the 100th time that it is okay to go
outside that talking with other people isn't as bad as he might think

not thinking negative thoughts about my ability as a parent of a son with Aspergers

not letting exhaustion over separating things so they don't touch because it really stresses him out with a kind and willing heart instead of hidden animosity

not hating myself because I wish he was born differently, 'normal'

not wishing I was dead but rather living each moment with the intention to love each person, each moment, even the imperfect ones

Walking in his shoes means less of me and more of HIM.

Want to just write? Join up with Ellen Stumbo each week as she shares a writing prompt.

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{Crochet} Working My New Scarf

2013-01-28T09:31:00.000-08:00

Pattern: Team Spirit Throw

I finally finished my San Francisco Giant's blanket and the sweet gal finally has possession of it. I love finished objects.

Now, what to do next?

Instead of designing patterns I decided to concentrate on working up other crocheters' patterns. I have tons of patterns that I've purchased over the years but never made. No more. 2013 is the year of the completed projects for me.

Soon after the Giants blanket was done and washed I took out my large 'K' hook and the rest of the white Red Heart super saver yarn. I decided to work on a new pattern I bought for my kindle.

The pattern is by Sedruola Maruska and is called the Chains Crochet Scarf Pattern. It is a beginner pattern and uses the extended single crochet stitch.

What I Like About This Pattern

I like the simplicity of it. I know that when my crochet students ask to move past the simple double crochet scarf I have them make - I will suggest this one. I also like that the chain stitches work as a noose stitch. (see picture above - I simply slipped one end of the scarf into the chain stitches)

This pattern is very adaptable. You could easily make the scarf thinner by using less stitches in the foundation row. You can also make it into a cowl if you wanted - adding a couple of buttons to the front.

What Can Be Improved

First off, this is a great pattern but I do wish there was a reference to how to make the extended single crochet stitch. Before this pattern I did not know this stitch. I did a Google search and found a tutorial for it by CrochetnCrafts on Youtube. Second, I think that it could have been written with a little bit more detail. (Sedie has her own tutorial for the extended crochet stitch - you can check that out here.)

For Example:

It says to repeat row 11 for pattern but I''m thinking she meant to write repeat row 11 and 12 for pattern. It states to repeat rows 14 - 18 until you have desired length but I think she meant to write 'repeat row 13 - 18' because if you didn't make row 13 you would have 4 rows of extended singles instead of 5 which is what you start out with.

Knowing how to read patterns and fill in the missing parts is how I was able to complete this scarf but if you are new to reading patterns (note - it does say it is an advanced beginner pattern) you might get a little lost.

Who This Pattern is For

If you know how to read patterns - meaning, you know what the designer means even though it isn't specifically written - then this pattern is for you.

Who This Pattern is NOT For

This pattern is not for someone new to reading patterns. If you are a beginner crocheter who knows how to make a chain and single crochet stitch you might be able to make this pattern with assistance. i.e. get a little help from a friend

One more thing to note, Sedruola offers pattern assistance. If you buy the pattern just contact her via her website or the email given in the pattern.

Disclosure: The opinions are my own. I bought this pattern and was not paid or compensated for this review. The link to the pattern is an affiliate link to the Amazon pattern.

Linking up with It's Maybe Monday hosted by ZaMarah of Designs by Hebrew Hands.

What's on your hook? Share below and be sure to share your ideas with ZaMarah in the linky above.

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{Just Write} Free Writing Stinks

2013-01-22T00:00:00.000-08:00

Today I'm joining Extraordinary Life writer Heather in her weekly linky 'Just Write'. The purpose of this linky is to Just Write. No rules, just write about what is happening, right now in this moment.

Phaitoon - http://freedigitalphotos.net

Tuesday Linky - Just Write - Timer 15 minutes --- Start ------

Sitting at the dining table, typing on my laptop, trying to 'free write'. I've been writing all day with a purpose - to get things done. Now I sit with a half empty Pepsi, an nearly empty coffee mug and a bowl of buttered popcorn.

My mind doesn't really know what to write about. I have a mess to clean up. My table is filled with notes, a journal I write in each morning before starting work. My kindle is on its side on top of my journal beckoning me to relax on the couch and just read - for the sake of enjoyment - not for the latest writing tips, not for the latest blogging tips and certainly not for the latest ways to make money freelancing.

This morning I had to backup my computer. Funny thing backups. For the longest time I was a stickler about them. Whenever my auto backup would remind me to insert disk here, I would do it. Last year I got tired of doing it and stopped. My computer crashed twice last year. Lost everything. If it wasn't for those 'tedious' backups that I got tired of, I might not have the laptop that I am writing this post on.

Yellow, red, purple and green. The colors of my sales funnel. {smiles} I am determined to double my freelance income this year and thought it would be a nice focusing tactic to make a large poster. I will put it on the wall behind my desk as a way to keep my mind from wondering - which is does often.

An old mason jar is right behind the laptop - filled with all sorts of colorful crayola markers. They look pretty in the jar. How come no matter what you add to a mason jar it looks pretty? You can even add a tea light to the inside and light it and it brings an almost romantic feel to a room that otherwise would feel glum on this cold winter day.

I feel like I'm forcing myself to write. To write with descriptions that I don't normally write. I am sitting here thinking - what should I write about now? Is this the point of this exercise? When will the 15 minutes be up?

Pretty soon, I'll be done with this and get into the car and drive my eldest son to Carl's Jr. He has a craving for those .99 cent spicy chicken sandwiches. Ugh.

Just looked up at the ceiling - dust webs - must clean that up after I write this post. Need the broom to wipe them off. How do they get there? How long has it been since I cleaned the ceiling? Wait - should I have written that? Oh, well, too late.

Taking a sip of my Pepsi, a couple of kernels of popped corn - now I'm sure that timer should be going off any time now. This is harder than when I write with a purpose - I guess I need to do this more often because it is quite unsettling - not knowing what to write about, to describe a moment that is quite boring if you really think about it.

Gosh, just looked at the time and I still have over a minute left. Good grief.

Husband, walking outside, catching the sun rays. he loves to walk, to stare at the bright blue sky, to smell the flowers and take in each breath as though it is his first. How did I get so blessed?

30 more seconds and this little experiment will come to a close - there now, did that make me feel better? Not sure, will try free writing again next Tuesday - Hope I didn't bore you too much.

~~timer end ~~

Interested in giving free writing a try? Extraordinary Ordinary hosts the linky each Tuesday. Join in.

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{Writing Prompt} Speak Up Will You

2013-01-21T13:53:00.001-08:00

Simon Howden - http://freedigitalphotos.net

Today I'm linking up with Ellen Stumbo with the writing prompt ~ Speak Up. I also challenge myself to 'Just Write' for 15 minutes straight. No correcting, no holding back.

Timer Start ~~ 15 minutes ~~

Speaking up has always been a tough one for me. It's only because I am a mom that I speak up at all. My children have really taught me that I need to speak up not only for myself but for those who need someone to defend them.

Take gay teens for instance. No matter how you feel about the topic of homosexuality the fact is that gay teens have a rough time. Some may not show it because they've built up defensive walls around themselves so that you won't see that they are hurting.

Think about all the defamatory statements that get spoken in conversations daily about being gay. It is so common place that I had to really stop and listen.

The Listen Challenge

This experiment was a challenge to me from my son because I am under the impression that he see's the world in a much dimmer light that I do. "I am always giving people way more credit than they deserve" - at least that is what my son says. The reason I may come off that way is because I know how screwed up I am.

I give grace to others and believe the best about them because I know how deep inside I am better than what I appear to be on the outside.

Last weekend I took to listening to conversations, television shows, radio shows and even writing I read online and in books. It is appalling how much stuff is negatively said about someone based solely on their sexuality. The crazy thing is most of the worst culprits are those who claim Christianity or Love as their religion.

I'm the first to admit that I have a hard time with understanding that homosexuality is not a choice. It is the way I grew up - it was taught that way especially in my Christian home. I also noticed during this challenge that those close to me often use derogatory terms toward those who are gay and they see no problem with it - almost as though they are less than human so don't deserve respect. (~~Sounds just like racism doesn't it?~~)

My son told me not to include the reference to racism because it's not the same. Gay people can choose to 'hide' it whereas people with a different tone than white can't just 'hide' it. It shouldn't matter whether you can hide it or not - it is still wrong and we need to speak up and let people know that this is unacceptable.

Last week I wrote about judgment and how easily it crept up on me - someone who claims not to be judgmental. This challenge showed me another creepy side of me too - a part that cringes at someone just because they say they are gay. Not sure if it is the word or if it is the idea but I do notice a 'turning away' when it is on television.

My Christian faith would have me believe it is because it is a sin - but so is gambling, so is over indulging in anything - drugs, alcohol, sex, food - the list goes on. Do I cringe at these "sins"? Nope.

What is it about homosexuality that turns me?

I will have to dig deeper into myself with God's grace to show me because even though I can say with my mouth, I don't care if you are gay, my body, my physical reactions tell a completely different story.

My son, my wise 17 year old son, is always teaching me things. Children raise us almost as much as we raise them. He definitely challenges my belief system.

How about you? What are your thoughts on homosexuality Do you say one thing and do another? You don't really have to comment on that, just take that question into yourself, meditate on it.

Speak Up

Speak up for those who are being mistreated. Love. Love at all times and no matter what. This has always been something I stand for. God help me if it is only words.

~~ timer ends ~~~

If your son or daughter came to you today and said "Mom, I'm Gay" What would you do? Would you get angry? Would you be disgusted? Would you feel like you are a failure?

Why?

Interested in joining in on the Writing Prompt linky? It happens each Monday - visit EllenStumbo.com for more details.

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Green With Envy and Judgment

2013-01-18T05:25:00.001-08:00

Ambro-http://freedigitalphotos.net

Are you a Judgmental Person?

At first I would say no, I'm not judgmental but after Tuesday night's get-together I have to rethink that. I went to a meetup with other local bloggers. As always I'm nervous and self conscious thinking that I have nothing to offer anyone. (being "just a mom" and all)

I walk into the room filled with what looks to me very professional people. People who obviously are not struggling or unemployed. Sure I have writing gigs but hey, I still live with my folks. Did I happen to mention I'm 40, married and have 2 children? Not the picture of success I envisioned as a bright eyed high school student with big dreams.

Funny thing about judgement - the more you think other people are being judgmental the less you have to face your own judgmental ways. Tweet This

Judgement defined:

Having or displaying an excessively critical point of view (dictionary.com) OUCH!

Hello My Name is Sara and I'm Judgmental

The whole time I'm in this little room with these great people sharing stories about our little blogs I'm thinking they 'hate me'. They probably think I'm this poor white trash chick who has no business being here. Okay where did that come from? If someone were thinking that - what's it to me?

Here I am observing these innocent people and accusing them (at least in my mind) of judging me all the while I'm the one judging them. I put thoughts into their minds. I assume that they think less of me. If they did think less of me they certainly did not show it.

Facing Your Judgmental Attitude

Enter each situation with an open heart and mind
Give others the freedom to form their own thoughts about you (negative or positive)
No matter what - LOVE (you can't go wrong with love)

Victor Habbick - http://freedigitalphotos.net

Next time I enter a room filled with people and my ugly insecure monster creeps it's little head out from behind my tough exterior I will shove it back and accept people at face value. There is no way I can "MAKE" people like me. I can only present myself as I am.

What Does the Bible Says:

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. ²For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. ~ Matthew 7:1,2 (BibleGateWay)

How do you feel when people judge you? When you walk into a room does your mind automatically classify people into groups? Why?

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{Writing Prompt} At the End of the Day

2013-01-13T23:30:00.000-08:00

I'm joining Ellen Stumbo's weekly writing prompt - At the End of the Day. Today I'll set my timer for 15 minutes, write, and share my thoughts with you. If you'd like to join in, please visit today's linked up post.

~~ Timer 15 minutes start ~~~

Kane Gledhill via http://freedigitalphotos.net

Days are long here. I wake up to prepare lessons for my son. He's in sixth grade now so I don't have to be totally 'there' with him but I do have to teach new concepts, especially in math. After I have him all settled, I'll get a load of laundry and/or dishes started or put away.

In between all of this I might write down some article ideas as well as fill in some more information on outlines I've already made. I usually go back and forth to my son, helping and answering questions he might have.

By noon I get lunch ready and start to clear things up from the dining table where my son does his lessons. I know my second son will be home soon so I start in on a bit of an after school snack.

If we have errands to run or activities to do I'll drive them to those. I also volunteer and have classes to attend so those are pushed into my schedule here and there.

After the boys are in bed this is the time I work. I write the articles that need to be written. I edit others and I blog on the various blogs that I maintain. I've started doing videos and podcasts so I might do a bit of this while everyone is asleep so I'm not so self-conscious.

But, At the end of the day, what I like to do is sit on the couch with my Kindle and read. After a few chapters I'm pretty relaxed and ready for bed. I always end my day with a few scribbles in my journal, a prayer and then a bit of podcast catch up.

I like to listen to Gwen Shamblin, Sandi Krakowski and Joyce Meyer. All three of these gals lift my spirit and help me believe what God has wanted me to believe for so long - I'm worth it, I have a purpose and I am okay just the way I am.

Most nights I'll fall asleep to one of their teachings so even when I sleep I'm learning to love my self the way God wants me to.

At the end of the day I know that all the busyness of the day boils down to this.

How have I bettered the lives of those closest to me?
Did I say I love you?
Did I make them feel they are loved, important, the best person in my whole world?
Did I offer encouragement and strength?

If I say yes to these questions then my day was worth it. If I can't say yes to these things I know that change needs to happen. No matter what I do in this 'business' of writing and blogging if I neglect the most important relationships in my life - it is worth nothing.

Finding balance between work and family - and crafting for that matter - is tough. I need to know that at the end of the day I am living my best life in humble worship to God, my family and my self.

What do you think about at the end of your day? What would you like to accomplish? What do you consider to be a good day?

~~~ timer stop ~~~

O.K. I cheated a bit, my son came in while I was writing so I stopped and talked with him. This is probably not a full 15 minutes of writing but it goes well with what I'm trying to get across. Stop what you are doing and listen. Listen to the people in your life - your real life - not the screen life.

Listen when they talk to you, the gadgets of this century will still be here - at the end of the day - only Love remains and gadgets can't love you back.

P.S. I'm linking up with Ellen Stumbo on Writing Prompt. Won't you join us?

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{Blog Dare} Instead of Making Things Easy

2013-01-12T20:48:00.000-08:00

Today I'm participating in the writing prompt from Blog Dare. "Instead of making things easy .."

~~Start Timer~~ Writing for 15 minutes ~~~

Dundee Photographics-http://freedigitalphotos.net

Are You a Freedom Writer or an Imprisoned Writer

In life there are people who take the road that brings the least resistance and then there are people like me. When it comes to making things more complicated than they have to be I am the queen.

Take for instance - writing. I blog for a living. I write for a living. It should be quite easy for me to just write for 15 minutes, check for spelling errors, grammar errors, and then hit publish. No, not me. I have to re-read and re-read and then re-read it again.

I also check it in preview mode a couple of times to see what it looks like to others. I then go on a debate to see if I could have said something different or if I should not say something. After, I'll put myself in my readers shoes and try to think about all the thoughts that could possibly cross her mind.

Instead of making things easy on myself I process what I write for hours. This is one of the reasons I'm always in front of my computer screen. Blogging really shouldn't take hours. You write your post, you correct it, and you publish it. Bada bing bada boom.

Enter a New Writing Technique

Lately though I've taken some advice from writers who have been at it for a long time. Writers who have been published and are even self-publishing their work. They just write and let it go. I've done this in the past and then look back on my work and can't believe I wrote it.

This post however is an example of me practicing to let it go. I set a timer for 15 minutes, write, correct grammar and then just publish it. I let the readers give their feedback and I release the writing into the great space called the internet. I will try (really hard) not to let this post invade my thoughts for the next hours.

Since starting this little exercise I find that I can write with more focus. Sometimes the stuff I write is just plain rubbish but other times I can glean a paragraph of two and use it in another piece I'm working on.

Just because I write it doesn't mean I have to publish it. Tweet This

I find the process freeing and it really relives my 'worry wort' mind. I have a tendency to think way too much. I over think. I over process. It is painstaking how much I'll ruminate over something. It is paralyzing. So, I created a 12 steps to a blog post list for me to follow. Hopefully it will help eliminate the over thinker in me.

12 Steps to Writing a Quick Blog post

Choose a topic to write about (you don't have to publish it right away)
Set your timer to 15 minutes
Write. Just type whatever you are thinking and let the thoughts roll onto your screen.
Don't correct your spelling and grammar just yet
Grab a photo from a free to use source like http://freedigitalphotos.net or http://morguefile.com
Add the photo to your post
Add a call to action - sign up for RSS via email or sign up for your newsletter
Ask a question to engage your reader into your writing
Check spelling and grammar
Preview your post
Hit the publish button
Share your posts with your friends, online communities

~~~Timer Ended ~~~

What about you? Do you make a seemingly easy task hard?

Want to join the Blog Dare? The challenge is to write freely. You can use the prompt provided or use your own. There are no rules, only write.

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{Squidoo Update} Destination Writing

2013-01-10T10:20:00.001-08:00

This week at Marsha's Spot we're blog hopping destination articles on Squidoo. Like Marsha, viewing articles, videos and photos are the means in which I travel the world. I like the internet because of that. I can write and chat to people all around the world and see what life is like in their part of the world.

My Traveling and/or Destination Articles:

Jiggoja via http://freedigitalphotos.net

Fair Oaks, California is one of the first articles I wrote highlighting various events in what used to be my hometown. I love Fair Oaks because it a little suburban gem among all the chaos of city life.

Each year we have a Renaissance Fair and a Chicken Festival. Fair Oaks is known for free range chickens walking the streets of old town.

Tom Curtis via http://freedigitalphotos.net

Another destination article I wrote featured a vacation I went on in 2009. It was a girls vacation and we visited Sequoia Kings Canyon. What I remember from that trip is no noise (I have a home filled with boys) and I got a lot of crocheting done. In fact, I went through the entire book "Hip Hats and Cool Caps by Afya Ibomu".

Do you write on Squidoo? Share your traveling articles by linking up with Marsha's Spot?

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{Squidoo} What Makes a Top Tier Lens?

2013-01-07T08:20:00.000-08:00

I'm been on Squidoo since 2007 and although I have a couple of articles in the top tiers I still don't understand why. I'm guessing because of the type of article it is - crochet pattern directory - that it might have to do with click outs as many people who visit these lenses will click out to the recommended pattern.

Here are my Top 5 Squidoo Articles

125 Crochet Appliques - A directory of crochet appliques patterns.
Crochet Hats - A directory of crochet hat patterns
Crochet is Cool - another crochet pattern directory
Mustache Beard Hat Costumer - a free crochet pattern of my version of the bearded beanie
Prayer Journal Organizer - a how to article on making a home management and prayer journal

I'll show you the Stats on the Crochet Hats lens because that lens always gets to the top during the months of December and January. Sales (Royalties) for this lens for 2012 is at $233.59. In addition to the cash I donated $69.23 to both KIVA.org and ProjectBread.org.

Now because these are pattern directories it is quite easy to list additional patterns or books that will help someone learn a stitch or a new pattern. I also suggest yarn, hooks and other supplies. Sales via Squidoo has always been through Amazon and more often than not it has been a crochet book.

Remember: Squidoo pay is actually a couple of months behind so some of these totals are for 2011 even though I received payment in 2012. This lens was created 2/17/2008 and has earned lifetime $825.37.

This might seem impressive to some but comparing this lens to someone who makes a rockin' sales lens and sees 5 - 10 sales a week on their lens it's not so awesome. I totally thank God for anything I make from my writing on Squidoo. I love how Squidoo makes it easy for me to donate to charity as well.

Promotion of this article is done through Twitter, Google+ and Facebook. I do have a crochet community to share with so am thinking that might benefit the article to some extent.

So, the question to you is What Makes a Top Tier Lens? Please share your tips or theories below.

Linking up with Marsha's Spot - Squidoo Lens and a Hop.

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Why I Write

2013-01-06T00:00:00.000-08:00

image: anankkml via http://freedigitalphotos.net

I'm joining Ellen Stumbo in her Writing Prompt linky. Each week she sends a writing prompt to her subscribers. This week the prompt is "Why I Write". If you'd like to participate or read what the other participants are writing visit Ellen Stumbo's Post on "Why I Write". (live 1/7/2013)

I'm also taking on the idea of another blogger about just writing, not worrying about the grammar but just writing for the sake of writing. You'll see me start a 15 minute writing session and then end it. {smiles}

~~Start Timer 15 Minutes ~~

I remember writing something very similar to this topic last year. (Why I Blog) I write because it is an expression of who I am. It is a way for me to get everything out. I'm the type of person who thinks way too much. It can get annoying at times. I'm forever taking notes on everything. Yes, I'm the one who takes copious notes while on the phone.

Why I write online?

I started writing online in 2005 as a way to drive traffic to my wahm businesses. (I did a lot of direct sales back then.) Eventually I found Squidoo and my writing muse was released. Once I started writing about my other passion - crochet - I couldn't stop.

I have a growing collection of articles on Squidoo but I also write on Hubpages, Wizzley, and Ezine Articles and more. My all time favorite place to write though is Squidoo. Sure it's just another article directory but it is unique in that they offer a way to donate some of the shared ad revenue. The first year I was on Squidoo (2007) I didn't make enough so I think I donated it by default to the Squidoo Fund.

After I started making a little bit more I chose to donate 10% to KIVA.org. This past year (2012) I let my readers choose which organization to donate my 10% to and they chose Project Bread. I'm glad they did because I was introduced to a great non-profit and was able to donate almost $110 to their cause.

This year I'm not sure how I'll decide which charity to give to but I do know I will be boosting my 10% to 15% this year. My hope is to be able to one day give 100% to charity. Right now it is what funds my online presence - (e-junkie, domains, etc.)

Back to the topic of Why I Write -

I write because I can't help it. My heart feels deeply and although most of the real 'deep stuff' doesn't go live online, it is what feeds my soul.

I write to make decisions. If I have a problem I write down the facts, possible solutions and then try and work it out.

I write to express my heart to God. I keep a prayer journal because actually sitting down and praying is hard. My mind wanders a lot. Writing my prayers gets them out and it also provides tangible proof that God does answer prayer.

I write to provide an income for my family. As a ghost writer, I write articles that will never have my name on them. No credit, No fame, just cash in exchange for an article. I don't mind not having my name attached to something so it's probably why this is a good way for me to earn a living.

I write to be silly. Sometimes I'll sit and try out new things. I'm not a poet by any means but when my son had to learn Haiku in school, I took it upon myself to create a few little poems of my own.

I write for my children. Many letters they don't see. I'm hoping that once they pass this thing called 'adolescence' that they will be more open to reading my letters to them. In my letters I express my hopes and dreams for them. I also express my heart to certain problems they are facing. They may not be able to accept these words now in the midst of their problems but I hope that one day when they read my letters they will see that I was listening and that I truly care about every aspect of their life.

~~ Timer End ~~

So, how did I do? Did I portray the topic clearly? Do you understand why I write?

P.S. Want to Join in and write a post about why you write?

How about you? Why do you write?

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Welcome 2013 (Mary's Song - long post)

2013-01-01T02:24:00.000-08:00

Wishing you a very lovely 2013. I'll be busy this month hosting a blog challenge over on my crochet blog so I'll be scarcer than usual over here. Join me at Crochet Business Blog.

Take a quick listen to this song by JJ Heller - Mary's Song. I was listening to a playlist with her songs while working today and this song came on and I broke down in tears.

God showed me in that moment that all the worry and tears I have for my boys is carried by HIM.

"Forgive me if I can't stand to watch you suffering ..." This line killed me. I'm getting tearful just writing this.

God gave his only son, Jesus. His mama watched as they tortured him. She couldn't do anything for him, yet she also knew that this son of hers was her savior.

God knows the tears I've cried over my boys. I feel like such a failure when it comes to them. I hate that I can't protect them from everything the world throws at them. I hate it when they get hurt and I can't help them.

Mary was a mom just like me. She held her baby in her arms, nursed him, loved him, watched him take his first steps. She cleaned his scraped knees. Cleaned his muddied feet. Held him when he was sad. Celebrated with him when he was happy.

"I never wanted to say goodbye"

As moms, sometimes we have to stand back and watch our children take roads that we know will cause them pain. We can't do anything to stop it. We can't shield them. They must travel the road they are destined to take. They are the only ones who can choose to not go that way.

As moms we have to accept that we don't know the plans he has for our boys but have to trust that even if we can't see it - God wants their best. He loves them way more than we ever can.

Sometimes I just want to scream!!! It hurts so much. I remember giving birth to my boys. I remember the hours just holding them in my arms. I remember when they wanted to spend every moment with their mama. I remember when they thought I knew what I was talking about.

Parenthood is a tough job. I've yelled at God for giving me children. In my head I think, if he knew what a poor job I would do why in the world did he bless me with these precious souls.

I have learned so much about life and about myself through my boys. Ugh, I've grown so much - I've fallen so much. I see my complete and utter need for a savior to help me raise them.

I've had to let go of many things - ideas I thought I was firm in - I've had to look at things differently - to accept that I don't know it all - that I may be (and probably am) WRONG.

In another of JJ Heller's songs she talks about how she has no fight left - That she's given up trying that she's given it all to God. This is me in this moment. (I need you God.)

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Merry Christmas 2012

2012-12-23T22:57:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve is tomorrow and I wanted to wish all of you a Merry Christmas. I know I am mainly writing for myself on this blog but just in case fate has you cross my path - I am blessed to have you for a visit.

Are you a movie watcher?

Today I watched "The Letter Writer" and was in tears throughout the entire movie. It was a movie that speaks to the heart of every outsider.

You are first introduced to Maggy, a rebellious teenager who is angry at the world, especially her father who abandoned her mother to start a new family.

She receives a letter from Sam Worthington. She doesn't know who he is so she searches him out.

She finds him in a nursing home and develops a relationship with him. It is through him that the world opens up to her.

Sam teaches her that she has a choice. She can either choose to give love or hate. She can choose to be with people that bring her down or choose to serve others in love.

Watch the trailer and you'll get a glimpse into the letter that a complete stranger sent to a girl in need of acknowledgement.

You are somebody. You are worthy. You are loved. The world is a much better place with you in it. Share your talents and shine.

Merry Christmas,

Originally posted by Sara Duggan 12/23/2012

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National Blogging Day of Remembrance

2012-12-16T23:59:00.000-08:00

Please donate to United Way of Western Connecticut

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{WAHM} Top 3 Ways to Earn Money with Zero Investment

2012-12-14T04:25:00.000-08:00

Image:Tom Clare/http://freedigitalphotos.net

You're a mom who stays at home with her little ones. Nothing shouts "I need more money" than the holidays right?

Some families are so tight financially that they can't even invest in a small direct sales company. Sure you can sell Avon for a $5.00 (last I checked) investment but what about inventory and parties and well, the list can go on.

What can you do to earn extra money that doesn't cost you money?

Write
Use Saving Programs
Blog with ads, sponsored posts or affiliates

Writing:

Writing is simple and there are plenty of sites online where you can submit your posts and share in ad revenue. Some sites include, Squidoo, Seekyt, Wizzley, and Hub Pages.

Squidoo is my favorite because you don't have to sign up for each ad company. All you do is sign up and Squidoo pays you. With the other sites you need to have your own Google Adsense account, eBay account, Zazzle account etc.

Learn how to write on Squidoo

Savings Programs:

This way really isn't earning money perse but in saving money you are adding to your bottom line. In some cases you do earn "money" by earning gift cards to various shops. Some of the programs I've had success in are My Points, Inbox Dollars* and Swagbucks.

My Points - use their site to shop stores you would already go to and earn points. Turn these points in for gift cards. A great way to save for birthdays and Holidays.

InBox - this site is a read email for money site. Now, I did earn $30 with them but and this is a big BUT - it took me over a year to earn this. I no longer use this site but I'm mentioning it because for some families this might work.

Again, the way you earn more money is by shopping using their links in the stores you would normally shop. Some of the emails have you signing up for accounts which I refused to do which is why it took me so long to earn what I did.

Swag Bucks - my favorite program for earning Amazon gift cards. Again, this is a shop and earn site but you don't have to shop to make swag-bucks work for you. You can simply use their search engine and do little tasks like watching videos and participating in the little games they have from time to time. It is by far the most social of the programs which is a plus.

Monetize Blogging:

This last one will earn you some cash but it can take up to a year or longer to really see any fruit from your labor. You need to be consistent and develop a following or 'tribe' of people. You can set up a free blog on blogspot (wordpress won't allow ads) and incorporate Google Ads, Google Affiliate ads, and in text ads (ex. chitika) into the content of your blog.

The important thing to note about this method is that the demand on time can be long if you don't plan well. If you are a great writer and time manager it can be very rewarding.

A resource you might want to check out is Business Among Moms. They have a Mompreneur 30 Day Challenge email list that goes into developing a business from a Mom's point of view. I'm reviewing the course right now so will have more details later but so far I really like it.

Conclusion:

It is possible to start earning extra money with no investment. Here are three things to take away from this this article.

First, no matter which option you choose remember to just do it. Seth Godin the founder of Squidoo said "Pick Something and Do It." It is the fear of starting or launching that keeps people from succeeding.

Second, don't get sucked into spending because it does get tempting when you are subjecting yourself to all the marketing online.

Third, always, always, always read the terms of any program or service you use.

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{Prayer Journal} My Tab

2012-12-12T00:00:00.000-08:00

photo: David Castillo Dominici/http://freedigitalphotos.net

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ has forgive you." Ephesians 4:31-32

My personal tab is for areas I need prayer on. I'm a real mess at times. I like to think I hold it together pretty good but my prayer journal shows my true self. The self that is in need of a savior - Jesus - the only begotten son of God. Love. Forgiveness. Acceptance.

Back when I was recovering from postpartum depression and had a real distaste for all things Bible, God and Church ~ I was blessed to receive a little life motto ~ "Love at all times". I started living my life around this very simple sentence. Which I vainly thought came from me.

It was only 3 years later that God showed me that those words were actually part of a verse in Proverbs 17:17 which states that "A Friend Loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity or hardship". It's just like God to give me something like that. Here I thought I was stepping away from him and religion and at the heart of my "life motto" was love which is the heart of God.

I have a 31 days of prayer for my "need" which is addiction or gluttony for food and for the approval of people. I insert my name into the little spaces which are little prayers with verses. I printed these off a site which had these for all sorts of needs - a topical prayer list - back before I knew to add the site for reference. (did a google search and found it PrayerClosetMinistries Prayer Guides)

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{Prayer Journal} The Children Tab

2012-12-10T00:00:00.000-08:00

photo:Ambro/http://freedigitalphotos.net

Each of my boys has their own tab in my prayer journal. This is because each challenges me in different ways. :)

I have need of prayer in my dealings with both but in different areas. I need a bit more patience when dealing with one over the other. I also need a bit more faith in God's ability to control things for the good when dealing with one son. (Yes, I'm vague for a reason. My son's deserve privacy.)

My Children

In each section for my boys I've included Brooke McGlothlin's 21 Days of Prayers for boys. I also have a fill in the blank type of prayers for each boy. Each prayer for 31 days highlights a topical section which is custom for each of my sons in the areas I'm struggling with or I see them struggling with. Each is personalized with their name along with the verse that corresponds with the prayer.

I also printed this off 31 Prayers for Your Kids from Bob Hostetler's site back when it was published. You can buy the card from NavPress. (https://bobhostetler.squarespace.com/31-ways-prayer-cards/)

In their sections I also have a prayer poem by Shirley Pope Waite, Stand in the Gap, and a song by Mark Shultz, He's My Son.

As with all of my other sections I include lined paper for written prayers. I'm a writer so I'm always taking notes, doodling and writing little sayings and quotes that help me focus in my prayer time.

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{Prayer Journal} The Husband Tab

2012-12-07T00:00:00.000-08:00

Image by photostock/http://freedigitalphotos.net

My tab for my husband is very simple. It includes a couple of letters he wrote to me that mean a lot, the praying for your spouse eBook by Ashley Pachea, and the Praying for your Husband prayers by Nancy De LeMoss. (not sure if she is the original source)

On a good week I spend every day in prayer for him. Lately, this has been lacking. I do pray short little prayers for him on and off but I'd like to spend more time in concentrated prayers like I did when I was first married and even before we were married.

I also keep lined paper inside to journal my prayers for him specifically. These might include prayers for certain blessings on his life as well as prayers about clearing my negativity and bad habits in order to love on him more.

I've gotten away from concentrating on the whole "Proverbs 31" wife thing. For me it was more of an attainment of trying to check off things on my list of things to do rather than out of a heart response to my husband.

I love my husband and I didn't even know about the whole Proverbs 31 thing before I married him so I'm not going to make it more complicated than it needs to be. To love my husband is to honor him and respect him - to serve him with love at all times.

I remember back before we were married I could tell by the ring of the phone whether it was him or not. I was so happy, giddy in fact, whenever I got to talk on the phone with him.

Just because we are older doesn't mean we have to get rid of that giddiness when we get to hang out or talk with our lovers. In fact, it should be more so.

Ann Voskamp has a site AHolyExperience.com where she writes about being grateful for all the little things in life. I'd love to take this idea but gear it toward my husband.

I want to make a list of things that I am thankful for with regards to my husband. Things like his smile, his servant heart, his music, his love for our boys, his consistency, his love for me, his patience and believe me the list can go on and on.

I guess I just started.

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{Prayer Journal} The God Tab

2012-12-05T00:00:00.000-08:00

Image: Angelslight.org/http://www.christiansunite.com/

Revamping my Prayer Journal

I featured the 31 Days of Home management Printables series from Organizinghomelife in my free Christmas craft ideas series in November. This inspired me to update my own prayer journal which, sad to say, has been collecting dust on the bottom shelf.

Today I dusted it off and am starting on my God tab. Although I've been reading the Bible and trying to get myself to attend church on a regular basis I find my closeness to be lacking.

December is the perfect time to prepare this prayer journal as I am preparing my heart for the rebirth or resurrection of my Savior. Now, of course I don't know when he'll come back again but I want my heart to be completely focused on Him when he does return.

This is how this section looks now:

Bible Section

My God section is actually three sections right now. The first is a Bible section in which I have lined notepaper and the S.O.A.P. acrostic I learned from MomsToolBox the host blog for the Bible in 90 Days.

I don't use it much now but when I do I take the reading for the day and use this acrostic to write about what God shared with me. S. the scripture he placed on my heart, O. an observation I noticed, A. an application or something I will do or learn and practice in my life today and then P. which is my prayer for the day.

Prayer Section

In my Prayer section I have an article from Joyfulheart.com "How to Spend an Hour in Prayer" by Dr. Ralph F. Wilson. He breaks down an hour of prayer in little sections - Preparation, Praise and Thanksgiving, Petition, and Intercession.

I also have a prayer by Alice Joyce Davidson:

"Take my heart
and make it
Your dwelling place
so that everyone I touch
will be touched also by You."

Music Section

This section was inspired by my husband who keeps a collection of songs in his prayer book. I have songs by John Michael Talbot, Phil Keaggy, Michael Card, Laura Story, Keith Green, Ginny Owens, Don francisco, J.J. Heller, Casting Crowns, and some Hymns in there as well.

"But Seek First HIS Kingdom and HIS righteousness, and all these things (things concerning life on earth) will be give to you as well..."

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