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<channel>
	<title>Schwilm</title>
	
	<link>http://www.schwilm.com</link>
	<description>Just another poor bastard</description>
	<pubDate>Fri, 05 Dec 2008 01:57:18 +0000</pubDate>
	<generator>http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7</generator>
	<language>en</language>
	<sy:updatePeriod>hourly</sy:updatePeriod>
	<sy:updateFrequency>1</sy:updateFrequency>
			<atom10:link xmlns:atom10="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" rel="self" href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/Schwilm" type="application/rss+xml" /><feedburner:emailServiceId>Schwilm</feedburner:emailServiceId><feedburner:feedburnerHostname>http://feedburner.google.com</feedburner:feedburnerHostname><item>
		<title>December 4, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/hCtOPjd4k9k/december-4-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/december-4-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Dec 2008 01:57:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[cat]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[king]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[toothbrush]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=246</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/schwilm-18.jpg" alt="" title="Schwilm - December 4, 2008" width="400" height="1265" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-252" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see SCHWILM coming home from work)<br />
SCHWILM: Oooof! What a crappy day! All I want to do is sit down in my chair and relax.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
(SCHWILM is standing over his chair.)<br />
SCHWILM: Hey - beat it, cat! Get out of my chair. The king is home and wants his throne!</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
(SCHWILM is standing, watching THE CAT leave)<br />
SCHWILM: Don't crab at me! Who pays the bills around here anyway?!<br />
(We see THE CAT's tail as he exits, meowing loudly)</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
(SCHWILM is sitting, head thrown back)<br />
SCHWILM: Whew! Finally the king can relax!<br />
KELLY: The cat's sitting on your toothbrush.</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<feedburner:origLink>http://www.schwilm.com/december-4-2008</feedburner:origLink></item>
		<item>
		<title>November 28, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/9HSe8JA9Ou8/november-28-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/november-28-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 Nov 2008 22:18:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Barack Obama]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Conan O'Brien]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[George Bush]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Jay Leno]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Thanksgiving]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=240</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/schwilm-17.jpg" alt="Schwilm - November 28, 2008" title="Schwilm - November 28, 2008" width="400" height="1265" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-243" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(Wee see SCHWILM in front of his congregation with Thanksgiving decorations around him. An overhead banner reads "Thanksgiving service at the Marvelous Institute of Togetherness")<br />
SCHWILM: How about we celebrate Thanksgiving by each saying what it is we're thankful for this year?</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
SCHWILM: Right, so, who would like to get us started?<br />
SYD (raising hand): Oooh, ooh, me me me!</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
SCHWILM: Great! Go ahead, Syd.<br />
SYD: I'm thankful that this country is going to have a peaceful transfer of power in 2009.</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
SCHWILM: Yes, we're all glad for the peaceful transfer from President Bush to Obama...<br />
SYD: I was talking about the transfer from Leno to Conan. What are you talking about?</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<feedburner:origLink>http://www.schwilm.com/november-28-2008</feedburner:origLink></item>
		<item>
		<title>November 20, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/bf6ydwuxA04/november-20-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/november-20-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 21 Nov 2008 01:33:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[California]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[election]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Ellen]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[gay marriage]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[maverick]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Proposition 8]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[socialism]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=232</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/schwilm-16.jpg" alt="Schwilm - November 20, 2008" title="Schwilm - November 20, 2008" width="400" height="1265" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-237" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see SCHWILM and his FATHER-IN-LAW sitting in the living room, with drinks).<br />
DADDY: Well, the voters have spoken and apparently they prefer a socialist for a president over a true American hero and maverick.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
DADDY: But at least the good people of California had the good sense to ban gay marriage, thank God!</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
DADDY: You agree with me, of course.<br />
SCHWILM (drinking): Mmmmpf.</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
DADDY: I'll assume for your sake that was a yes.<br />
SCHWILM: Is it getting hot in here?<br />
KELLY (sticking her head in the room): Honey, can i delete some of your Ellen episodes from the DVR?</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<feedburner:origLink>http://www.schwilm.com/november-20-2008</feedburner:origLink></item>
		<item>
		<title>November 13, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/8eScW3QYs3U/november-13-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/november-13-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Nov 2008 20:39:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Barack Obama]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[election]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Sarah Palin]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=226</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/schwilm-15.jpg" alt="Schwilm - November 13, 2008" title="Schwilm - November 13, 2008" width="400" height="1265" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-229" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see the SCHWILM sprawled on the couch, holding the remote; KELLY is standing over him holding his wallet.)<br />
KELLY: Um, honey?<br />
SCHWILM: Mmmm?</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
KELLY: The election is over, right?<br />
SCHWILM: Yep.</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
KELLY: And you're glad Obama won, right?<br />
SCHWILM: Of course.</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
KELLY (looking mad): Then why do you have a picture of Sarah Palin in your wallet?<br />
SCHWILM: What? Your picture comes first!</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<feedburner:origLink>http://www.schwilm.com/november-13-2008</feedburner:origLink></item>
		<item>
		<title>November 6, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/B8ibcP4EVEI/november-6-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/november-6-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Nov 2008 03:02:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[American]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Democrat]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Elisabeth Hasselbeck]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Republican]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=215</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/schwilm-14.jpg" alt="Schwilm - November 6, 2008" title="Schwilm - November 6, 2008" width="400" height="1265" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-223" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see the EXTERIOR of the Marvelous Institute of Togetherness (MIT).)<br />
SCHWILM: (VO) Well, the election is finally over.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
(INTERIOR of MIT; SCHWILM is standing in front a crowd)<br />
SCHWILM: Now, after two years of heated debates, negative campaigning and rancor, it's time for the country to come together again.</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
SCHWILM: Because, whether you're a Democrat, a Republican or an independent, now is the time to remember that we're ALL Americans.</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
SCHWILM: So, I suggest starting by reaching out to somebody with different views from you...<br />
SYD (standing up): Right, I'll start stalking Elisabeth Hasslebeck again!</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>October 31, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/dh4dl0xsxM8/october-31-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/october-31-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 01 Nov 2008 00:51:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Barack Obama]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[election]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Joe the Plumber]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[socialist]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[tax plan]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=205</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/schwilm-13.jpg" alt="Schwilm - October 31, 2008" title="Schwilm - October 31, 2008" width="400" height="1265" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-212" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see SCHWILM on stage, holding a piece of paper. SYD is next to him holding a piece of paper and a plunger.)<br />
SCHWILM: With the election coming up, we're going to reenact the famous meeting between Barack Obama and Joe the Plumber. I'll be Obama, Syd here will be Joe.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
SCHWILM (reading from paper): Hi, I'm Barack Obama. What's on your mind?<br />
SYD (reading from paper, waving plunger in the air): Hi, I'm Joe the Plumber. Senator, how will your proposed tax plan affect my business that makes more than $250,000 a year?</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
SCHWILM (reading paper): Well, Joe, to ne honest, you will pay more taxes under my plan, but spreading the wealth is good -<br />
SYD (pointing plunger at SCHWILM): SOCIALIST! YOU'RE A SOCIALIST!</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
SCHWILM (readin paper): Wait, see, now that's not in the transcript...<br />
SYD (still point plunger): EWW, YOU'RE A SOCIALIST WITH BAD BREATH!</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<feedburner:origLink>http://www.schwilm.com/october-31-2008</feedburner:origLink></item>
		<item>
		<title>October 23, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/gzBCtyCq5hk/october-23-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/october-23-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 24 Oct 2008 00:10:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[conditioner]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[economy]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[satellite radio]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[satellite TV]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[shampoo]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=190</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/schwilm-12.jpg" alt="Schwilm - October 23, 2008" title="Schwilm - October 23, 2008" width="400" height="1257" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-201" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see SCHWILM and KELLY sitting at the kitchen table.)<br />
KELLY: OK, we need to really tighten our belts. What we can cut back on?<br />
SCHWILM: Right, hmmm.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
KELLY: How about no more satellite radio?<br />
SCHWILM: No way! I need that in the car. Keeps me sane.</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
KELLY: Oh, ok, well how about no more satellite TV?<br />
SCHWILM: And give up access to every football game on Sunday? No way!</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
KELLY: Honey, come on. We need to cut back on luxuries...<br />
SCWILM (holding two bottles): Do you really need both shampoo AND conditioner?</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<feedburner:origLink>http://www.schwilm.com/october-23-2008</feedburner:origLink></item>
		<item>
		<title>October 16, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/qi8IGJ2Pxso/october-16-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/october-16-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 Oct 2008 00:19:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[cash]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[economy]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=188</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/schwilm-11.jpg" alt="Schwilm - October 16, 2008" title="Schwilm - October 16, 2008" width="400" height="1262" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-195" /></p>
<div id="hidden"><!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see SCHWILM outside digging in the dirt. KELLY is standing over him)<br />
KELLY: Honey, this economy is starting to scare me.<br />
SCHWILM: Mmmm.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
KELLY: We need to talk about our finances.<br />
SCHWILM: Mmmm Hmmm.</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
KELLY: We need to tighten our belts.<br />
SCHWILM: Right, betls.</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
KELLY: Will you stop gardening while I'm talking?!<br />
SCWILM: Who's gardening? I'm burying what's left of our money!</p>
<p>--></p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>October 7, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/2WHy2FZUbkk/october-7-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/october-7-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 Oct 2008 00:52:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[bailout]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[banking]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[choking]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[liberals]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=179</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[



]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/schwilm-10.jpg" alt="Schwilm - October 7, 2008" title="Schwilm - October 7, 2008" width="400" height="1263" class="size-full wp-image-183" /></p>
<div id="hidden">
<!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see SCHWILM and DADDY, his father-in-law, sitting at a table in a restaurant. There is an empty seat between them. SCHWILM is lifting a forkfull of meat towards his mouth.)<br />
DADDY: So you libs must happy that the government has nationalized the banking system.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
SCHWILM (starting to choke, grabbing throat): What... (gack, cough, wheeze)<br />
DADDY: What? You're choking? I suppose you want me to bail you out of this too.</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
SCHWILM (hands around throat): (gack, gurgle, hack)<br />
DADDY (rolling eyes; slaps SCHWILM on back): Fine. You got yourself into this mess, but once again I'll save you.</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
SCHWILM (spitting out chunk of food): Thanks, sir.<br />
KELLY (standing over her chair): I'm back. What're you boys talking about?<br />
DADDY (smiling): Sports. Cars. Guy stuff.</p>
<p>-->
</p></div>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>September 30, 2008</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Schwilm/~3/7B4XH8J-rCY/september-30-2008</link>
		<comments>http://www.schwilm.com/september-30-2008#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Oct 2008 00:20:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Phil Johnson</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[debate]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Ike]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[JFK]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Joe Biden]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Sarah Palin]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[swimsuit]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[vice president]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.schwilm.com/?p=166</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[



]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.schwilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/schwilm-9.jpg" alt="Schwilm - September 30, 2008" title="Schwilm - September 30, 2008" width="400" height="1261" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-176" /></p>
<div id="hidden">
<!--</p>
<p>FRAME 1<br />
(We see a banner overhead that reads Mock Vice Presidential Debate; AMY is sitting on stage wearing a sign that says BIDEN; WAYNE is sitting next to her wearing a sign that says PALIN)<br />
SCHWILM (reading from a card): Senator Biden, the next question is for you.</p>
<p>FRAME 2<br />
SCHWILM (reading from a card): You recently said you thought Hillary Clinton was more qualified to be vice president than you. Do you still believe that?</p>
<p>FRAME 3<br />
(WAYNE has left the stage)<br />
AMY: Did I really say that? Good lord, what was I thinking? I know this: I'm more qualified than this broad. (points to where WAYNE was sitting).</p>
<p>FRAME 4<br />
SCHWILM: OK, I think we'll end this here...<br />
AMY: As JFK said to Ike when they debated...<br />
WAYNE (wearing a swimsuit): When's the swimsuit portion of the competition?</p>
<p>-->
</p></div>
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