Sciencewomen

Sadness, Peace and Joy

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 10:02:43 -0500

When I began to blog almost 5 years ago, I wanted to share stories of my graduate school experience with other women scientists in the hopes that we could form a virtual support network for each other. Back then it took me weeks to find even one other woman doing the same thing with a blog. Today, there is a whole community of women blogging about their experiences in science and engineering, from undergraduates to tenured faculty. A google search of "woman science blog" or similar will point to some prominent blogs and from there a newbie blog reader can use blog rolls and comment threads to find the panopoly of bloggers having more intimate conversations about life, work, and the precarious juggling act of "having it all."

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Hanging up my blogging shoes

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 10:01:31 -0500

You might have guessed this was coming. My blogging frequency has dropped off dramatically this year, particularly this semester. I keep writing "yep, I haven't died yet - I'll tell you all about what I'm doing sometime, really" posts, and not ever following up.

Other signs have included....

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Two books and a blog for your future perusal

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 14:47:11 -0500

One of my colleagues Amy Slaton (a historian of engineering and engineering education at Drexel) has started a new blog in conjunction with the completion of her new book, Race, Rigor and Selectivity in U.S. Engineering: The History of an Occupational Color Line. Her work is brilliant -- thoughtful, grounded, clear, and with an appalling message about the raced character of engineering education.

Anyway, her new blog is STEM Equity, and you should also totally read her first book, Reinforced Concrete and the Modernization of the American Building which is similarly brilliant even though it has rather the most boring title ever (sorry, Amy). You should go read all of them.

My year of travel

Sun, 06 Dec 2009 17:24:56 -0500

Okay. It's been another month since I blogged. But since I last wrote, my dad wrote the family holiday letter and asked me how many places I've traveled to. Here's the list.

January
To Detroit to look at the SWE Archives

To RTP for ScienceOnline2009

February
To Arizona, invited to a workshop on engineering and ethics education

To Washington DC for a panel on research in engineering education

March
To Kentucky, to do some intense PEER mentoring in engineering education

April
I think nowhere

May
To Madison for my dad's retirement

To a room at Purdue for a week's development of a overhauled course

June
To Washington DC for JAM

To Amsterdam and Delft for a workshop on gender and engineering

July
To Detroit again to work in the SWE archives

To Grafton, New York for a workshop on engineering and identity

To British Columbia via Colorado and 5 national parks by car for our vacation

August
Back to Indiana from BC via Minnesota and the Minnesota Science Museum

September
Nowhere

October
To Long Beach for the SWE National Conference

To San Antonio for the Frontiers of Education Conference

November
To Atlanta for the National Women's Studies Association conference

December
Nowhere, thank god.

No wonder I'm tired. I think doing this much travel is not normal (or is it, for assistant professors?) After sending this list to my dad, I promised myself that I would not travel so much next year. For realz. And I have a whole bunch of carbon offsets to buy.

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20th anniversary of Montreal Massacre: We remember

Sun, 06 Dec 2009 17:22:18 -0500

On December 6, 1989, an armed gunman named Marc Lepine entered an engineering classroom at Ecole Polytechnique in Montreal, Quebec. He demanded all 48 men in the class leave the room, lined up all 9 women against a wall, and, shouting "You are all a bunch of [expletive] feminists!", proceeded to shoot them. He went into the hall and shot 18 more people, mostly at random. He finally shot himself.

He had killed 14 women all together, and injured 9 more women and 4 men.

The women who died could have been anyone. They could have been your friends, your mothers, your sisters, your lovers, your daughters, your neighbors, your students, your teachers, maybe even you.

They were killed because they were women.

Remember those who died in the Montreal Massacre:

Genevieve Bergeron, 21, was a 2nd year scholarship student in civil engineering.
Helene Colgan, 23, was in her final year of mechanical engineering and planned to take her master's degree.
Nathalie Croteau, 23, was in her final year of mechanical engineering.
Barbara Daigneault, 22, was in her final year of mechanical engineering and held a teaching assistantship.
Anne-Marie Edward, 21, was a first year student in chemical engineering.
Maud Haviernick, 29, was a 2nd year student in engineering materials, and a graduate in environmental design.
Barbara Maria Klucznik, 31, was a 2nd year engineering student specializing in engineering materials.
Maryse Laganiere, 25, worked in the budget department of the Polytechnique.
Maryse Leclair, 23, was a 4th year student in engineering materials.
Anne-Marie Lemay, 27, was a 4th year student in mechanical engineering.
Sonia Pelletier, 28, was to graduate the next day in mechanical engineering. She was awarded a degree posthumously.
Michele Richard, 21, was a 2nd year student in engineering materials.
Annie St-Arneault, 23, was a mechanical engineering student.
Annie Turcotte, 21, was a first year student in engineering materials.

Please honour the white ribbon as a symbol of the fight against violence against women.

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SciWo's Storytime: Bear Scouts

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 06:14:44 -0500

Gosh it's a difficult time of year, when the desire to frolic outdoors in the late fall/early winter chill is tempered by the mountains of papers to grade, endless meetings to be held, and the lurking danger of syllabi for next semester. It's the time of year, when you have every intention of taking dog and kid for a walk after work, but that by the time you reach daycare, it is pitch black, and even though you haven't gotten there any later than you did a few months ago, you feel terrible about leaving your kid in the care of strangers so late into the night.

Minnow and I have been trying to find ways to counter these daylight confines by squeezing in fun adventures on weekends (trips to living history farms, nature centers, and local playgrounds) and by using our long winter evenings to read about the adventures and misadventures of other outdoor enthusiasts. With that as an intro, I present the current favorite book in the Science household, Stan and Jan Berenstain's The Bear Scouts.

(Isn't it amazing how Minnow is picking up on the rhyming and able to supply her own words to end some of the lines of text? In another take she did far more of it than displayed here.)

After we're done reading about the Bear Scouts' adventures, we can retreat to the cozy four-season tent...

pitched inside my home office. Do you think my students will believe me if I tell them their papers aren't graded because I've been camping every night this week? (As I write this, Princess Pup has made herself comfortable in the tent, as she patiently waits for me to finish and play with her.)

To all the students and faculty out there, good luck with the end of the semester crazies and may you find time to escape to nature when it is all over.

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Inadwrimo is over, but the work never ends.

Mon, 30 Nov 2009 16:04:36 -0500

I did a not-so-stellar job of meeting my not-so-stellar goals for writing and research in November, but I did get some stuff done.

Done! Accepted!!!!! ~~Finish revisions on the paper-that-won't-die (goal: November 13)~~

Done! ~~Internal release time application (due November 18)~~

Read some, but not nearly enough. Read around proposed grad student topics enough to ensure we're not reinventing the wheel/pursuing proven dead ends (amorphous, I know)

Made progress, not enough to strike-through. Finish GIS work left-over from 2008 AGU poster.

Done! ~~Draft abstract that is due in early December,~~ so that I can get my co-authors' approval.

Done! ~~Write the letters of recommendation that have piled up because of graduate fellowship season.<~~/li>

And, I did get some reflective clarity on what my research (and consequent writing) goals are for next semester.

Get 4 grads to the proposal defense stage, get one grad to thesis writing stage, get one grad's first paper out

Do a good job writing my first PI NSF proposal and submit in June

Write my side-project paper (or at least finish the analyses for realz)

Continuing laying groundwork towards a collabortive proposal pushing edges of PhD work

Women-in-geo paper and/or diversity grant coalition forming

More than an ambitious list given my teaching load and home-life responsibilities, but, hey it's good to have ambitious goals, right? And having them as an ordered list should help me cross some of them out, rather than having all of them turn out to be half-finished in May.

SciWo's Storytime: Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days

Fri, 27 Nov 2009 06:43:53 -0500

This week we are reading Judith Viorst's Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. This video was produced with a dedication to Kate, who explained to me why kids like this book so much even before they understand everything that's happening in it. She wisely told me that it's because kids rarely get to hear a story about a kid getting really mad, expressing their feelings, and without a neat fairy-tale or moralistic ending. Alexander just has a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day, and he's not afraid to tell us about it.

I'd also like to dedicate this post to all of my friends who've had terrible, horrible no good, very bad days in the past few weeks.

To A, who made a hard, but right decision,
To A, who had hir Thanksgiving plans turned topsy-turvy,
To B, who needs hir advisor just to help hir for once for crying-out-loud,
To C, who just needs some stinkin' data,
To C, who is facing yet another round of surgery and recovery,
To J, who needs in-laws that appreciate hir wonderful cookery,
To K, who put hirself in a tight spot by fighting for the thing zie knew was right,
To K, who is trying to figure out how to help a friend, while taking care of hirself,
To L, who fears for hir job and hir career,
To M and S, who were too sick to enjoy the day of feasting
To P, who is facing so much loss right now,
To S, who deserves more thanks for the wonderful job zie does caring for hir family, and
To everyone who's family dinner was less than idyllic yesterday.

Hopefully by talking about our big and small troubles, supporting each other through them, and offering the respite of compassionate friendship, we can help make things a little bit easier and kinder for everyone. As for Minnow and I, we're having very good days, thanks in no small part to knowing we have a network of supportive friends and family. Thanks to all of you for being part of that.

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SciWo's Storytime: Little Squirt the Fire Truck

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 06:23:28 -0500

I am not in charge of SciWo's Storytime. Sure, it might look like I'm the one reading the books and operating the video camera, but Minnow exerts the ultimate executive authority as editor-in-chief. Some weeks no videos whatsoever are allowed to be made, some weeks she's content to let me pick the book, and some weeks she is quite happy to make a whole string of videos, so long as she chooses the content.

With that proviso, Minnow presents this week's edition of SciWo's Storytime featuring the book Little Squire the Fire Engine by Catherine Kenworthy and illustrated by Nina Barbaresi.

Now there's nothing wrong with reading about fire trucks, I just don't think that this particular book rises to the level of other classics of the genre, like Richard Scarry's Cars and Trucks and Things that Go or Wong Herbert Yee's Fireman Small books.

Anyways, I was in the process of contemplating Minnow's enthusiasm for fire truck books and wondering how I was going to get her to see a real-life fire truck when one came to us. Literally. Here's a photo of a fire truck parked at our house a few days after this video was made. No one had a fire, but an elderly neighbor fell and hurt himself and the firefighters/first responders were dispatched to help him up and to the hospital.

Minnow was very impressed, and also very relieved that the fire truck did not sound its siren on our tiny quiet street. When she was 1, the firefighters had come to her daycare for a demo and had sounded the siren for the kids. Minnow still talks about how scared she was.

We've got a wonderful book about pillbugs that I really want to make a video about, and we're still trying to track down some of the other great books requested by our DonorsChoose friends, so check back next week for another edition of SciWo's (and Minnow's) Storytime.

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Tips from the top: Mentoring is really, super important to help people succeed.

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:19:15 -0500

Recently I had the opportunity to attend a talk by Gail Cassell, a member of the National Academies' Institute of Medicine, and one of the authors of the NAS report Rising Above the Gathering Storm. Dr. Cassell is currently Vice President of Infectious Diseases for Eli Lilly. She was previously the chair of the Department of Microbiology at the University of Alabama Schools of Medicine and Dentistry at Birmingham.

Dr. Cassell has also done a great deal of thinking about the importance of mentoring, networking, and professional development opportunities in academia and industry. Here are some snippets of what she had to say in the opening part of her remarks, advice for navigating the new environment faced by junior scientists:

• There is no substitute for tenaciousness and perseverance.
• Always be open to new opportunities.
• Treat your colleagues well.
• Establish integrity of institutions. What you do is important, but how you do it is more important.

Dr. Cassell also talked about the characteristics of a good mentor, qualities that included accessibility, empathy, honesty, savvy, humility (most important), consistency, open-mindedness, and understanding of the current/new research/academic/professional environment. Mentors should be providing networking opportunities, offering moral support, and encouraging creative thinking. In turn, good mentees are proactive, probing, gracious, and humble in accepting critical feedback.

Of course, you are not going to meet all of your mentoring needs in a single relationship, so Cassell suggests to never let go of old mentors, establish both official and informal mentors and also find a set of confidants. She urges mentees to keep meetings professional.

Cassell also spoke about the differences in the way mentoring and professional development occurs in industry versus academia. She thinks they used to be quite different, but maybe not so much anymore. In her view, strengths in industry include: constant feedback and peer review; objective [and clearly defined?] performance measures; yearly development plans, treating human capital as the greatest asset; considering the sum of team and individual performance in evaluating success; and doing good succession planning. She talked about specific programs aimed at supporting scientists at Eli Lilly, including a women's network, on-site childcare, generous maternity leave, job sharing, flex time, remote sites of work, and a VP of Diversity. By the time she was done, I was almost ready to ask for a job application.

Dr. Cassell suggested that to make mentoring meaningful is to make it part of the institution's culture. To do that, it needs to be factored into performance evaluations, because the organization needs to put its money where its mouth is. She told us that bad mentors at Lilly get sent to "charm school." In my mind, this making mentoring part of the institutional culture, by rewarding good mentoring, is one of the biggest challenges to mentoring programs aimed at young faculty at universities. Most universities already place low value on service, and if mentoring is just one tiny component of a low value activity, then there's little way to provide incentives and rewards to good mentors. Of course, some would argue that seeing junior faculty succeed is its own reward. But over the course of busy work days, weeks, semesters, years... is that enough of a reward to actually motivate senior faculty to devote significant time and energy to mentoring those climbing the tenure ladder? Or will it only be enough to provide a twinge of regret when some young faculty are denied tenure?

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Hi. I'm boring. (But there's a beautiful necklace at the end.)

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 18:23:48 -0500

I even stole the title from Lady Scientist, because I am just that original these days.

I spent the week teaching, advising, mothering, and making some progress on my InaDWriMo goals for the month. As of last week the goals stood like this:

Done! ~~Finish revisions on the paper-that-won't-die (goal: November 13)~~

Done! ~~Internal release time application (due November 18)~~

Read around proposed grad student topics enough to ensure we're not reinventing the wheel/pursuing proven dead ends (amorphous, I know)

Finish GIS work left-over from 2008 AGU poster.

The paper got re-submitted on Wednesday! May that be the last time I ever see that paper except in proof or preprint. The release time application is fully written, with a colleague for possible critique, and will be submitted tomorrow or Tuesday after a final read-through. It is absolutely at the page limit, so I will have to resist the temptation to add anything. These accomplishments sound more impressive than they really are, however, when you consider that the paper was *so* close to being done before the week and the release application was not long and not technical. I didn't really do anything related to the last two goals, but I did talk with a distinguished person in my field who thought my students' work was interesting and novel, so that was nice and validating.

I did, however, get reminded of two more important and urgent tasks, which I am appending to my list of InaDWriMo goals:

Draft abstract that is due in early December, so that I can get my co-authors' approval.

Write the letters of recommendation that have piled up because of graduate fellowship season.

At least I can perk up an otherwise dull post (and week), with a fantastic piece of jewelry one of my readers brought to my attention.

Now, you can have one more way to proudly proclaim your passion for SCIENCE, by wearing this wonderful creation from underoakstudios on Etsy. You gotta love an artisan who make necklaces proudly proclaiming dirty words and who describes her aesthetic as "We make jewelry that showcases beautiful organic shapes and materials. Earrings, necklaces, and bracelets made of wood, shells, glass, stone, bone and seeds send us over the moon!"

That's it. I'm out. Back to my regularly scheduled routine. I've gotta make some fishsticks for Minnow's dinner.

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SciWo's Storytime: Knuffle Bunny!

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 06:39:24 -0500

Three weeks ago, I had no idea who Knuffle Bunny was. Then one of our loyal readers and DonorsChoose philanthropists, requested the Mo Willems' book "Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus." Minnow seemed enthusiastic about the pigeon book, but when I opened up its Amazon page, she got really excited about another book by the same author.

One trip to the public library later, we came home with a book that we'd read 5 times before making it out of the library building. I think she must have read the book at her former daycare, but no matter where the source of her knowledge, Minnow was more than happy to help me record a video of "Knuffle Bunny: A Cautionary Tale" by Mo Willems.

(Not in the habit of watching the videos? This one features Minnow's adorable interpretation of baby talk.)

While we were at the library, we also discovered a book that made Minnow shout with glee. It turns out that Knuffle Bunny has a sequel, "Knuffle Bunny Too: A Case of Mistaken Identity." And Minnow was only too happy to help me make a video of this one too.

I don't know how he does it but Willems managed to create two books that appeal to kids while capturing the very real emotions and antics of their parents. The scene where Trixie's daddy tries to explain what 2:30 am means is priceless.

After reading the books ~20 times in the first day, Minnow decided that she and I both needed our own Knuffle Bunnies. Fortunately, we had two plus rabbits already in our household, so they got lots of love and attention for the next two days.

But the real Knuffle in our house isn't a bunny at all. Rather the Knuffle Bunny of Minnow's heart is a plush dog by the name of Bobbie. Bobbie is the lovey that Minnow's parents decided she should adopt, and it worked like a charm. The name comes from a daycare teacher's corruption of 1-year-old Minnow saying "puppy" in reference to her toy.

There's another little secret about Bobbie - she's got an identical twin. Wise souls had warned us to procure a duplicate lovey and make sure that both twins got equal love, so that if one went missing, we'd have an identical replacement ready. We followed their advice and for months we fastidiously made sure that the Bobbies were never in each other's presence for fear of a similarity collapse. In a two-story house this was usually accomplished by having one Bobbie upstairs and the other downstairs, and the occasional tossing of a Bobbie over the stair railing.

But the inevitable happened, much like in the Knuffle Bunny. One day, at age 2.5, Minnow discovered that her unique, one-of-a-kind Bobbie was not so unique and one-of-a-kind. I experienced a Moment. Of. Terror.

And then Minnow announced happily, "Another Bobbie," set the two dogs together on her beanbag and continued playing. Since then, there have been occasional instances of two Bobbies, but much like the Large Hadron Collider, their simultaneous operation has not caused the world to end.

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Ask sciencewomen: If I'm happy with an MS, should I get a PhD?

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 16:30:27 -0500

From the mailbag:

I have a Masters in Biology (from a 5 year BS/MS program) and for the past 4 years I've been working as a lab manager/technician. I have my own research project(s) in addition to keeping track of ordering/equipment maintenance/mouse breeding/etc. All-in-all it's a sweet gig and I could see myself doing this or something similar for most of my career. The problem is that there seems to be this culture in biology that one has to get a PhD, and my competitive side kind of feels the need to get one mostly just to show that I can. My practical side can't figure out why it would be worth taking a pay cut for 5+ years of extra stress just to continue doing what I'm already doing. I have no desire to run my own lab, and have little desire to teach.
So on to the concrete questions:

What doors does a PhD open up aside from running a lab and teaching?

What can I do without a PhD?

How does one generally go about choosing a PhD project (assuming I do decide to get one)? The answer I generally get for this last one is to read about the research that other labs are doing and that I will "know it when I see it." But given the large number of labs at even a modest sized university, this is a very daunting task.

Dear _____,

Wow. Great questions. I think the first paragraph really contains the meat of the matter: if you are happy where you are, should you get a PhD just to prove you can?

No.

You sound happy. I have friends with MS degrees with jobs like the one you describe, and they are happy 8+ years on. As you say, you've found a sweet gig where you can see yourself staying. Why put yourself through the economic and academic hardship of a PhD, just to prove to a nebulous someone that you can do it? The scientific culture is also about macho masochism and no matter what you do, there will always be someone who is doing more...better...faster than you. So if you are happy, stay put.

But.

You are asking. Which means you are thinking about it. Maybe you are happy where you are...but you are the one who really wants something more than your current sweet gig for the next 30 years. We are conditioned through school to always be climbing upward and I think it can be disconcerting to find yourself in a job where there aren't obvious opportunities for advancement.

So.

I'd spend some real time reflecting on what you really want from your life and career and exploring the various options you have with an MS if you decide to move on from your current position. I'm a geoscientist, not a bio-med type, so I really can't help you with specifics. (That's my duck around your question on "What can I do without a PhD?")

If...

you do decide to pursue a PhD, make sure that you and your advisor are clear about your non-academic career plans and that he or she is supportive of you. One place to start with searching out alternative careers is with books like "A PhD Is Not Enough" and with "The Alternative Scientist" blog and those of its contributors. Katie at Minor Revisions writes a wonderful candid and metaphor-filled look at life in a bio-related industry job.

Yes.

Your friends are right. Read, ask around, attend conferences until you find the specific field that really, really excites you. You are going to need that excitement to get through ~5 years of the most frustrating and thrilling work you've ever done. But, maybe your friends didn't tell you this....you need to find an advisor whose mentoring style works for you. Is she hands-on or hard to track down? Does she expect 80 hour weeks 52 weeks per year? Are her students happy? Are her graduates successful in getting the sort of jobs you want to get when you are done?

Readers, what say you?

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What I'm working on

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 15:59:37 -0500

I'm not going to apologize about lack of posting over the last month or so, and I'm not going to make any promises for the future. That said, here's what I'm up to for InaDWriMo this month.

Here's what I wrote at ring-leader Dr. Brazen-Hussy's kickoff post:

Finish revisions on the paper-that-won't-die (goal: November 6)

Internal release time application (due November 15)

NSF proposal (due ~December 1)

After one week, I haven't finished the revisions, but I'm 90% done. No question as to me getting it done this week. I've got 3 pages of first draft of the 5 page release time application. This also will be finished this week, because it has to be finished. And...I've given up on the NSF proposal.

A combination of things (less free-time this month than anticipated, re-reading one of last year's InaDWriMo posts, assessing what I could ask of collaborators) made me realize that the NSF proposal was simply an unreasonable goal for the month. At best, I'd throw together a piece of shit application, give my new collaborators inadequate time to improve it, and get terrible reviews in my first PI NSF application. So, while a 6-month delay in getting this exciting new research plan submitted is a bitter pill to swallow, there's no question that it is a good decision.

Instead, I'd like to take my reasonably available science time this month to actually make sure I am setting my new grad students down reasonable courses for their theses. Any science time left over from that, I'll devote to finishing analyses from my 2008 AGU poster (subject of a InaDWriMo goal last year). This should give me everything I need to start really writing that manuscript next time I have a chance (say, next June).

So, at the end of week one, the score stands like this:

Finish revisions on the paper-that-won't-die (goal: November 6 13)

Internal release time application (due November 15)

~~NSF proposal (due ~December 1)~~

Read around proposed grad student topics enough to ensure we're not reinventing the wheel/pursuing proven dead ends (amorphous, I know)

Finish GIS work left-over from 2008 AGU poster.

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What would you do?

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 10:26:51 -0500

A few days ago I arrived at my office in the morning and was greeted with an unpleasant surprise...someone had scratched a cross into the bulletin board just outside my office door.

(Apologies for the terrible cell-phone picture.)

While I'm able to cover the image with a strategically placed advising schedule, I'm haunted by a terribly icky feeling in the pit of my stomach. Was someone trying to send me a message? Why a cross? Why my board and not the boards of my male colleagues along the corridor?

I'm not offended by images of crosses in general, but it is not something that I want outside my office door. I don't think it's appropriate for a faculty member at a state-sponsored institution to appear to endorse a particular region on state property. I am even more troubled because we've already had anti-semitic and anti-African-American incidents on campus.

But I am afraid that if I raise the issue with my chair or others in the administration, that this will be dismissed as trivial. Maybe it should be? But would the reaction be different if a student had vandalized "Fuck you" or some other swear word? Should I ask for a new bulletin board or just cover up the cross for the next 30 years?

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