Do you remember The Bangles hit 80′s song Manic Monday?  I love changing the lyrics to Magic Monday and let me tell you why.  I used to work at a swank LA restaurant and, like most LA restaurants, its employees were a talented group of individuals with big aspirations.  Each of us dreamed of living our ideal careers and wished we didn’t have to serve food to earn our income. (Ever feel like this?)

One Monday night we decided to press “pause” on our serving frustrations and “Fast Forward” to the ideal lives that we each yearned to live. We huddled at the hostess stand as I invited everyone to join me in a fun little exercise I call…

LIVING WITH THE END IN MIND

I chirped, “Imagine that we are two years into the future and tonight we are each coming back from our successful lives and careers to catch up with each other and to share how far each of us has come since our serving days. At this special reunion, the owner of the restaurant has agreed to let us wait tables and (because we are all extremely prosperous) we have chosen to give our tips to charity.”  A few people laughed, but everyone agreed to play along. 

As we prepared to open the restaurant, each of us imagined our lives two years into the future.  I then encouraged everyone to share out loud.  James confided that he was putting the final touches on the solo music album that he just recorded.  Shelley had written an inspiring children’s book and Hugh was acting as a series regular on a network TV show produced by his favorite playwrite. I disclosed that I had flown in from my mountain home where I coach my clients and write books when I’m not traveling and speaking to audiences around the world.  Everyone shared, with great detail, how beautifully their life had unfolded.

GAIN CONTROL OF YOUR MIND

That night at the restaurant, we were each Living With The End In Mind. When you live with the end in mind, you are actually programming your mind for success and setting in motion a powerful chain of events. Everything we see in our lives starts in our minds.

“You see, things are always created twice: first in the workshop of the mind and then, and only then, in reality. I call this process ‘blueprinting’ because anything you create in your outer world began as a simple blueprint in your inner world.” ~ Robin Sharma

By living with the end in mind, you are strengthening your belief in the successful outcome of your goal.  The more you focus on the successful outcome, the more you believe it.  The more you believe it the more you feel it, and the more you feel it the faster it unfolds.  This is also known as the law of attraction. 

Shakespeare said, “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” In other words, it is our thinking that makes something so.  And that is what we were doing at the restaurant.  We were imagining our successful futures and blueprinting that into our conscious and subconscious minds.  

“Formulate and stamp indelibly on your mind a mental picture of yourself as succeeding. Hold this picture tenaciously and never permit it to fade. Your mind will seek to develop this picture!” ~ Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

FEELING GOOD, NOW

Another powerful side effect of using your imagination to see yourself achieving a goal, as if it is happening right now, is that you summon forth the qualities and feelings that you secretly wish to experience by attaining that goal.  So, without having to actually reach the goal, you get to feel as though you have!

Research has proven that the mind and central nervous system cannot tell the difference between a real event and one that has been imagined. When you picture an event vividly in your imagination it is recorded as if it is a real experience in your mind and body.

The result? You feel great! You bring all those great feelings of Joy, Vitality and Confidence forward into the present moment. Plus, in this good-feeling state, you often receive flashes of insight and inspired ideas that support the successful manifestation of your vision or goal.

SHIFTING FROM “GETTING” TO “TAPPING IN” – A GIFT WE GIVE OURSELVES

Of course, manifesting something that we want does not guarantee our happiness.  In fact, the “getting” of the goal has little to do with our sense of fulfillment.  That’s right, you heard me!

You see, most of us spend our energy frantically attempting to reach goals in the hopes of experiencing certain qualities such as love, joy, peace, harmony, etc…  However, the reality is that no circumstance, person or place holds those qualities that we yearn to feel. These qualities are inside each of us (in abundance) and they are eagerly seeking to express through us. 

However, we often don’t allow ourselves to experience those qualities unless or until we reach our goal.  Why withhold that from yourself?  That’s like walking to the end of your driveway to get your your mail and refusing to breathe until you reach the mailbox.  What would you do if you didn’t get to the end of the driveway quickly?  You would collapse, because you were withholding (from yourself) the necessary oxygen you needed to actually achieve your goal.

Unfortunately, this is how many of us operate when it comes to our deepest desires.  We withhold our loving, peace and joy from ourselves until we achieve our goal.  This is why many people give up on their dreams or experience burn-out: They hold back (from themselves) the natural life force that’s trying to emerge from within them! Living With the End in Mind breaks this cycle and supports us in tapping back into our Power Source and experiencing the love, peace and joy that resides within us. 

BACK AT THE RESTAURANT… 

Within minutes of opening the restaurant, the phone lines flooded with reservations. People were walking inside and commenting, “It looked so inviting that we had to come in…” What started as 12 reservations, skyrocketed to over 60 within a few hours.

Each of us tried to hold back our excitement as we continued acting as though we were already living our ideal lives.  We joked with tables and shared about the prosperous happenings in our careers and personal lives (after all, we were living as if we had already achieved it!)

Can I tell you how much fun I had?  Never before was I so confident and sure of myself.  I was comfortable and relaxed and I had no concerns about what the guests thought about me.  I was so sure that they were enjoying themselves that I could feel their gratitude for having me as their server.  In fact, many of them expressed that gratitude to the management saying, “We don’t remember when we have had more fun than tonight.  The service and atmosphere was incredible!”

The aura of the restaurant was electric and the Joy each of us experienced was greater than any other night at the restaurant.  It was palpable–and our tips reflected it. This Monday night was more prosperous than any other night of the week!

As we ended our shift, we vowed to make every Monday night, “Magic Monday” and we joyfully looked forward to supporting each other in Living with the End in Mind. It was a truly magical time and the restaurant’s popularity grew rapidly.  Mondays became one of the busiest nights at the restaurant–and working at the restaurtant become one of my favorite things to do.  Imagine that, I went from resenting my job to looking forward to coming to work because I loved how good I felt on “Magic Mondays.”

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

If you are wondering if this process had any long-term effects on me and my fellow staff members at the restaurant, you may find it interesting to know: Hugh is now acting as a series regular on the popular network TV show, The Unit which was created by his favorite playwrite, David Mamet.  Amazingly enough, Hugh is now working closely with David on several other projects.

James (jameswhelan.net), who has completed another amazing solo album, has also scored several Hollywood films with his original music. Shelly has written a beautiful children’s book and her artwork is being sought after by galleries across the country. And in this moment, as I write this blog, I am looking out the bay window of my beautiful home that stands above a river in the Rocky Mountains where I coach my clients and write the speeches that I share with audiences around the world.

START YOUR OWN MAGIC MONDAY

What could you create in your life if you began to practice Living With The End In Mind? Imagine if you took a little time each week to see the successful fulfillment of your vision or goals.

Each week I have my own “Magic Monday” and I follow the exercise of Living with the End in Mind that we practiced at the restaurant.  How would your life change if you regularly imagined and felt your ideal life as if it were happening now? How might your beliefs shift to support you? Come on, let’s have a little fun.  I’ve typed the process of Living with the End in Mind below.  It will only take 5 minutes. Let’s do it together. 

TRY IT!

All you need is 5 minutes to enjoy this little exercise.

1. Find a quiet space to sit comfortably and be present with yourself without interruption.
2. Close your eyes and breathe deeply as you quiet your mind.
3. Imagine yourself, as if you are in the future, experiencing the fulfillment of your ideal goal or situation.
   • See yourself doing it. Watch your hands beneath you.. Feel yourself breathe… smell the smells… notice the feelings you are feeling. Breath in those feelings.. let them fill you… Experience how great if feels to be doing what you love. Notice how nice it feels to know that your journey has indeed led you to this joyful moment of experiencing what you love so much. You’re doing it. Feel it. Breathe it in and soak up all the good feelings that are present.
   • If any distracting thoughts come up, gently take yourself back to your vision of success and continue playing there. Do this for 5 minutes.

 Great job!  How was that for you?  I’d love to hear your experience of that exercise. 

WANT TO JOIN ME?

Feeling a little resisant to trying this on your own? Then join my “Magic Monday Manifesting Circle” and be powerfully supported in experiencing the reality of your ideal life–now.  (Like taking a yoga class, you’ll experience deeper and faster benefits with the added energy and focus of the group). Each group is limited to 8 participants as I provide group coaching designed to get you feeling the reality of your ideal life… and seeing it unfold right in front of you.  To register for an upcoming 4 week Manifesting Circle, Click here!

Watering The Seeds…of our Intentions

Let’s face it. We all have fears! No matter how successful we become, many of us are still visited by the pesky little voice of fear. I’ve found that trying to get rid of fear is a tiring (and hopeless) endeavor. It seems to me that success is not determined by our level of fear, but rather by what we do in response to it.

My step dad used to coach me in wrestling and would say, “If you want to move somebody to the right, move their head to the right. Wherever their head goes, their body will follow.” It’s so true. Try it. Have someone take your head in their hands and then (carefully) focus it in a direction. Now move forward. You’ll notice that your body naturally wants to move in the direction that you are pointed.

My step dad was right. People’s bodies do follow their heads. Mine did. My family laughs to this day about my short-lived wrestling career that began when I was 6. My Grandma loves to remind the whole family every holiday: “You were so cute… there you’d be on the mat in your little red wrestling outfit. And you’d be wrestling with another little guy and you’d be doing pretty good and, then, all of the sudden you’d see all of us in the stands. You’d turn your head, look up and wave… And just then, that little opponent would grab you and flip you over on your back and pin you, just like that…”

Thank you Grandma.

I’m not sure which is more embarrassing. Getting pinned so easily or the fact that I wore an outfit that closely resembled a 1940′s women’s bathing suit. I share this story not because of how cool I looked in that candy-apple speedo, but rather to illustrate how my focus led to the circumstance that followed. “I mean he flopped you over like a ragdoll.” Grandma, we get the idea. “You were like a wet noodle.” Grandma, that’s enough! “I’ve never seen anything like it. It  was like you weren’t even trying. Just this red, limp flash of spandex flying through the…” GRANDMA!!!

You don’t have to be humiliated in front of a crowd of people like I did to learn the power of your focus. But if you are experiencing challenges in moving forward on important life goals, you might ask yourself: Where is your head pointing? Where is your focus?

Often times we have exciting aspirations and inspiring goals, yet our attention is focused on distractions like our worries or fear of failure. Jerry and Esther Hicks speak of the power of our focus in this way, “Where we place our attention, energy flows. . . what we place our attention on expands.” (Ask and It is Given, Jerry and Esther Hicks.)

As you know, it’s not my style to articulate a challenge without offering an effective tool help you avoid or transcend that challenge. So here goes! This technique is called “Watering The Seed.” In a garden, the seeds that get watered grow. The ones that don’t… well, don’t. It’s that simple. Even though there may be weeds of fear growing in the soil near our desires, we must only water our desires if we are to be successful.

I want to offer you a simple little game designed to support you in Watering The Seed of your desire so that it can grow:

STEP 1: Relax your body and close your eyes.

STEP 2: Get clear on the intended outcome you desire.

STEP 3: See yourself experiencing that successful outcome as if you were living it right now.

 You want to place yourself firmly in the center of this vision and see the scene through your eyes as it is happening. Allow yourself to feel all the good feelings that surface as you successfully realize your desire. Breathe that sensation in…. Now, while your eyes are closed, describe out loud the experience you are having, as it is happening. Use the words “I am” as you describe yourself in this scene. You can do this with a supportive friend as an exercise or just alone. You can also do this exercise by writing the experience down as you are envisioning it.

What science tells us is that our subconscious minds cannot differentiate between reality and imagination. So if you imagine that you are winning a race, your brain releases the same chemicals and, physiologically, reacts in the same way as if you are actually winning that race. In fact, this is how many Olympic athletes train for their success.

I want to show you how simple doing this exercise can be. I encourage my clients to participate in this fun little exercise. Below is an excerpt from one of my coaching sessions, which demonstrates how the tool of “Watering your Seed” can support YOU in focusing on what you want rather than on what you don’t.  

——START OF COACHING SEGMENT——

CLIENT - I’m frustrated with my business. I want more clients. I’m worried about the economy and I’m struggling to change my circumstances. I feel frustrated and I don’t know where to start.

COACH - So what is it, exactly, that you want?

CLIENT - I want more clients and I want to increase my bottom line.

COACH - Okay, great! Exactly how many clients do you want and what, specifically, do you mean when you say, “increase my bottom line?”

CLIENT – I want 10 clients who pay me in full and in advance for my services.

COACH - Great specificity. Now, would you be willing to play a little game with me?

CLIENT - Sure. ..

COACH - This game is called, “Watering the Seed.” It’s intended to support you in focusing your attention on what it is that you desire. So what I’d like to invite you to do is describe to me, in detail, what you want and the experience you’d like to have as your 10 clients come to you gracefully and easily. I’m also going to invite you to describe this to me as if it were actually occurring right now. So, rather than telling me “I want this and I want to experience that,” I want you to express your desire as if you were living it, in this very moment, starting with the words, “I AM.”

CLIENT - Okay, I can do that. . . (closes eyes). . . I am in my home office and I’m looking out of the window at the beautiful jacaranda tree with its purple blossoms. I’m feeling so inspired as I prepare for my third phone client of the day. I’ve just finished my 30 minute daily meditation and I feel so peaceful and clear. I’m powerfully connected to my Inner Knowing  and excited to work with my client today. I’m experiencing a lightness in my chest as I think of how my clients came to me so effortlessly. I’m looking at my list of 10 active clients and I’m filled with such gratitude! I feel so much love and joy as I think of how much I enjoy working with each one. Oh! My next client is ringing in! She sounds so happy and excited. A smile crosses my face as we connect and she tells me of a recent win she experienced as a result of our last session together. She is acknowledging me and telling me how much she loves her appointments with me. “I’m getting even better results than I imagined,” she says. I’m listening to her as she shares with me that her relationship with her husband has also blossomed from all of the work she has done with me. Her husband is so excited about the changes he sees in her and their relationship that he wants to work with me too! Clients are coming to me so easily and I have more than I ever imagined I would. I am joyfully recommending clients to friends who are practitioners and it feels so good to share in this way. And what’s funny is the more that I share, the more clients come to me. I love it! I feel so abundant and prosperous. Oh! There is my next client! I love my job!

COACH - Great, how was that for you?

CLIENT - That was fun and I feel awesome! I actually feel as if I already have those clients. I’m not feeling any of the anxiety that I was feeling before that exercise. I feel good, but what do I do now

COACH - That’s a powerful question. When you were imaginging yourself in that scene, having clients and looking out your office window at the jacarandas, did any inspiration come forward  around how you might attract clients?  

CLIENT – Actually, I felt like my clients found me because of my speaking.  I felt like they heard me speak and wanted to work with me because something I said resonated with them.

COACH - Would you like to explore this idea of speaking to attract clients?

CLIENT  - Yes, I love speaking and would enjoy that very much. Hey, I can do the “Watering the Seed” exercise with speaking, too!

COACH - That’s a great idea. I love your enthusiasm and willingness to focus on what you desire. Excellent work! 

——-END OF COACHING SEGMENT——-

O.K., I’m back. That was a powerful session don’t you think? And you can see why I love working with my clients! I want to acknowledge and thank my client for allowing me to share this portion of our session to inspire all of us who are reading this.

You see, often times we unknowingly thwart our intentions by placing our attention on our fears, rather than on our dreams. By “Watering The Seed” of your intentions, you will allow your dreams to prosper, while the weeds of fear will fall away from lack of nourishment. What we focus on expands and by giving our desires our attention and focus, we begin to experience the uplifting feelings that we also desire.

In fact, as you witnessed in the above coaching session, my client experienced the very feelings that she thought would experience when she successfully reached her goal. She experienced them while she was envisioning her dream, in that very moment. For all her brain knew, she was actually on the phone with her client and had a full practice. She was living the full desired outcome– right then and there.

We are no exception. The qualities we want to experience through achieving our desires are available to each of us in every moment, no matter what the circumstance may be–even if you are wearing a red spandex wrestling uniform! And we can summon them by connecting with the vision of what we want for our lives. However, it’s not necessary that we reach our goals to experience those qualities and feelings… but that’s the subject of our next conversation.

Where are you placing your focus and attention? What qualities do you want to bring forward in your life? How can you begin to experience those qualities right now, in this moment, and not at some distant point in the future? Comment here and share your thoughts!