Alternating Reality

Levelling Up.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sun, 12 May 2013 20:40:00 +0000

I woke up on this (unsurprisingly) chilly morning with a Sudden Clarity Clarence look on my face (something like this, except I wasn't high on life). I was surprised that I didn't wake up with a headache or any grogginess considering last night's events. I thought to myself, "What if we are all a part of a gigantic video game like the Sims or GTA, or any other game that has the option of displaying a character's statistics based on its "life" in the game. Like in the Sims, in which we can customize the characters by giving each one of them hobbies, personalities, unique abilities, etc., what if someone (umm... God?) did the same for us, humans." Each one of us reacts to a certain thing differently, based on our customization. Lets take alcohol as an example for the sake of the argument. After a night of heavy consumption, some of us wake up with a mind shattering, brain ripping, brain pounding headache which forces us to take necessary measures to combat the hangover, while others wake up normally and go about their daily routine. It all depends on the characteristics that are given to us from the ones available in a long drop down menu somewhere.

What if we are just characters in the game of life being played by the gods and we're just experiencing the game in the best way possible. What if life, the universe and everything is just a massive, multiple server, PvP game between the gods, with each God and His specialized ability controlling the various aspects of life, like wisdom (including sudden clarity moments), beauty, personality (based on experiences in life), death, etc.,. If that is the case, shouldn't we have our own stats bar on record somewhere, indicating our XP/HP in our various skills? This reminds of something I read on reddit some time ago about working out at the gym. I can't find the post and the comment right now though. Search on reddit is a pain in the gluteus maximus. From what I can recollect, a redditor said that working out is like levelling up. You gain all that muscle and power and like in a game, you level up in real life (there's an app to track your progress). I found that really cool and deep. What if there actually is a stats bar that fills up automatically based on our actions but the aliens stole it?

Some more food for thought - Mother's day and Father's day should be spent in celebrating the life of the first born and that mother's days and father's days should be on the birthdays of their children.
Not hungry? okay.

Revenge of the sixth.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Mon, 06 May 2013 18:41:00 +0000

Hi, again.
First of all thanks for clicking the link. I know you may racked your brains for the last time you saw a link to this blog and I know that you've forgotten that you've liked the blog's Facebook page. It receded into the list of the millions of Facebook pages that you once liked and didn't give a damn about the second after the "Like" turned to "Liked".You aren't the only one. I've never once visited the blog's Facebook page or this website. Okay, I lied. I visited this webpage once... OKAY FINE, MULTIPLE TIMES JUST TO GIVE THE PAGE HITS! I was honestly surprised to see the page views cross 10,000. I even had a mini party in my head for it.

An update on me. Contrary to popular belief, I'm alive. I'm approximately 11384 km (7074 miles, for my fellow Americans). I have survived a year of college in ~~America~~, oops, pardon me, 'MURICA! THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD! It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Other than the winter, which lasted for an insanely long time, I seem to like it here, so far. The winter is ridiculous here. I could rant on and on about the sub zero temperatures and how stupid and confusing the Farhenheit scale is compared to the Celsius scale, which I've used my entire life, but it is not this day. Today is a nice day. The birds are chirping about their freedom, the sun is shining with it's rays of freedom, the leaves are rustling about in the wind speaking of their freedom, there's freedom everywhere. Typical 'Murican Day. I shall post about my experiences in college and time here, in the US, in the later posts.

I see that my last post speaks of Manchester United's major screw up last year. Ha, perfect timing for this post then. Number 20 on the way! Haven't been able to keep track of the IPL as closely as I would have liked to. My IPL fantasy team is screwed over because all the players I choose secretly have a meeting and decide not to play well in that particular match.

Here's to more rants and complaints about my life at that point in time, no more clicking of the Forgot Password? button on blogger.com and no more rubbing your eyes and pinching yourself and doubting whether the link to this blog is a spam which would take you to webpage asking you to shoot the rubber duck or download a silent ringtone. I'm hungry now, WHERE THE HELL IS MY EXTRA LARGE, DEEP FRIED, QUARTER POUND FREEDOM BURGER?!

Hmm....DaedalusMinion here. I am making an entry here to remind Akshith I exist too. Fuck yeah India.

Opinionated Thoughts.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Mon, 14 May 2012 11:02:00 +0000

So Manchester City won the Premier League title after 44 years. Some say that they truly deserved it. It'll be a crime to disagree. Some say that they managed to win it because of their filthy rich owners and thus good quality players. I wouldn't disagree. Their never say die attitude even after United were leading by 8 precious points and even after they were trailing QPR till injury time in their final match of the season make them deserving champions. United did fuck up their chances of winning EPL title #20. They have themselves to blame. WHO GIVES AWAY AN 8 POINT LEAD?! For now, until the beginning of the next season, Manchester is Blue. The Reds should use this as inspiration to kick City's wealthy ass.

And now, it's time for emo Akshith to be emo.
"She" here is fictional. "He" could be fictional.
She said something that he had not heard for quite sometime. "How could she?", he pondered, "Why would she?". His thoughts wandered from acceptance, to denial, to hatred and finally to insensitivity, the most common state of mind in which he functioned. He felt that he really needed to hear it, a reality check of sorts. Everyone has their opinions, he shouldn't be bothered, instead use opinions to get better. Why is he making it a big deal, he pondered. He shouldn't.
Chetan Bhagat's tweet is so true. Most suited for the current state of affair in his life.

He was awake 15 minutes past his bedtime because of it. 15 precious minutes spent in thinking.

House is my new obsession for now. Not watching Game of Thrones until I finish reading the books. Haven't started reading the books. The character of Dr House is so perfectly scripted that he instantly becomes a role model. Love the fact that he hides his "misery" and boredom in jokes and sarcasm.

Sister Mary Eucharist - You hide behind your intelligence
Dr House - Yeah that's pretty stupid.
Sister Mary Eucharist - And you make jokes because you're afraid to take anything seriously. Because if you take things seriously, they matter. And when they matter ....
Dr House - When things go wrong, I get hurt. I'm not tough, I'm vulnerable.

‎"Even with the most calculated plans, unpredictable things happen. But no matter what, we keep going".

Football-ing the Internet.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 16:04:00 +0000

It's the middle of the night, the cat is wailing, you're not interested though, instead there is a bright screen of a tablet in front of you which has your attention. On that screen are, approximately, 10 people and a ball frozen in motion, like as if Kronos had arisen and was testing out powers. You stare at the screen, in anticipation of being able to watch the men and ball move. Nothing happens. You start tapping the screen, urging the men to do something interesting. They rebel. Then panic strikes. You curse. You start to sweat. The cat wails louder. You still ignore it. Then you pray to The Almighty, begging Him to stop the torture and penalize you for your misdeeds in some other way. Then you start to rape the modem, abusing it and the internet service provider in the process, calling them cheats, among other eargasmic words which if spoken in front of your mom would cause a seizure of her heart. After the modem has restarted, you coax the tab to function well so that you can reap the benefits that come with a good internet connection and a device that supports Flash. Finally, after 10 minutes of intense struggle, that would have made the Mahatma proud, Real Madrid vs Bayern Munich live stream plays on the tab. But by then, you're too sleepy to bother about extra time and the result. But deep inside, you're fighting to stay awake, deep down you know you need to watch the match, 'cuz you need a good Facebook status and you need likes on it, to increase your mana. The urge to sleep over powers your worthless thoughts and you sleep, missing the penalties and the expressions on the faces of Real Madrid's staff and team when Ronaldo didn't score.

I know. It hurts.

You curse life.

I just watched this video. Seems apt.

UEFA needs to pick up tricks from the IPL. Having cheerleaders is going to draw the attention of more men, especially those who are tired of the ones in the IPL. If there was an award for fair play, John Terry would have thought twice before kicking the opponents buttock, he would have had the chance to play in the final. Goalkeepers would put that extra bit of effort to save a goal if there was an equivalent of Karbonn Kamaal Catch like Karbonn Kamaal Save. Replacing the mind blowing expression of GOOOOOAAAAAAALLLL when there is a goal, with one equivalent to DLF Maximum, maybe something like "Mastercard Priceless Shot" will help in re-branding scoring goals. Players will be inspired to create Priceless moments. There should also be good looking women to interview those on the benches even if their job is to make bland jokes and asking stupid questions. It would keep the TV audience interested when the crowd chants become unbearable and the ball is just being passed around.

Barcelona vs Chelsea was a good match. Don't think I've ever been excited more while watching a football match. And I don't watch football often.

Times Have Been Better

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sun, 22 Apr 2012 09:53:00 +0000

You may have wondered if this blog had been packed up in a banana leaf and left on a busy Indian street for the cows to devour and then excrete out and then used by the farmer for variety of purposes. You may have even been right, if it wasn't for those meddling kids and their dog. You may have been right if I hadn't known of what goes on in your mind. You may have been right if I had been utilizing my ample free time in doing something productive. Fortunately, you're wrong. For now...

Once upon a time, I had a certain job. A job that could have fetched me a good amount of the green notes, which help run the universe (I'm talking of money, not drugs), if I had the will power to work. Then one fine day, which coincidentally was the second day of the job, the will power to remain employed was thrown to the dogs. Asking people about their eating habits didn't suit me. I may have even scared off one of the to-be-respondent. That's how life is... Women just don't want to give me their phone numbers. Insert a sigh, if you please. It was the universe speaking to me in God-tongue, which I have nearly mastered, that the job wasn't for me.

Cooking 101 - The secret to make a good chapati, or anything circular from a ball of dough, is to caress the ball with a stick in all the right places, else it'll turn into a butterfly.
You may also enjoy this -

Uneventful Events.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 12:22:00 +0000

The past few days have passed without much shizzle.
Prom doesn't seem to excite me. Haven't even bothered much about the attire. Maybe because I'm a guy. Clothing has a lot to do with the gender. I might as well tweet from the ballroom. If you do follow me on twitter and if I do start tweeting from the ballroom, mainly due to the fact that I have no date, #Prom2012 will be the hashtag for the event.
Being the manager of a cricket team, which includes players I play with, is hard work. Almost no work at all. After a disaster with the class football team, resulting in my resignation after the first match, I gave up all hopes of becoming a manager again. Destiny had other plans. Here I am now with a 100% win record as manager of a cricket team.
I have absolutely no idea what I am supposed to be doing. The Google search shall help me. Google search never fails. Worthy companion.

Another tsunami warning for India. No. I'm not ready for another candle light vigil. May Poseidon be with the ones in danger of losing homes and lives. May the Force be with them. Stay safe.

Suzanne Collins is epic. I love that she has managed to add a twist or a suspense at the end of every chapter of Catching Fire. It gives me the goosebumps and I stare at the final sentence of each chapter in awe for about five minutes on average. May the odds be ever in your favor.

Yeh IPL Hai, Boss

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Thu, 05 Apr 2012 09:49:00 +0000

This is IPL, boss.

So the new season of the Indian Premier League started yesterday. It officially begun on 3rd April but the opening ceremony was lame, so it doesn't count. Filled with the glamour of Bollywood, one wondered whether it was the IPL opening ceremony night or just another Bollywood award show. Continuous re-runs of the TV ad will help erase the memories of the opening ceremony, but after a while, I'll have to burn the TV as the ad will become a torture. But for now, the TV is safe. The opening ceremony was bland, just like the food I'm being made to cook. Food, which I have no intention to eat later on in life. How is cooking such food going to help me? I don't know.

The first match between the Chennai Super Kings and the Mumbai Indians wasn't an epic one. Maybe the expectations were too high. The commentators blamed the pitch, saying that the pitch wasn't T20 friendly. The pitch curator must have been cursed in Tamil and fired by now by the CSK owners. Bloody traitor.
Hats off to the curator, though. Such a troll he is. It takes a lot of courage to introduce an alien wicket in the first match of one of the world's most glamorous tournament.
I will blame the opening ceremony for boring the crap out of the CSK team who were called on stage and made to shake their hips for their dismal performance.
Hopefully the pitch at Eden Gardens today will be a predictable one, according to whatever SRK and Gautam Gambhir have hoped for.

Sailing. Running. Rocking.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 16:38:00 +0000

There is just something divine that oozes out from the sea, or whatever one calls the water body I went sailing in the day before yesterday, that has a calming effect on the body. The aesthetic quality of the sea has this ability to absorb the residue exam stress and demolish it. Real good fun. And thank god for "I'm On A Boat" by The Lonely Island.

Temple Run is like life. At some moments, it is life.
There are monkeys or dementor like thingys behind you. You trip and they magically catch up, just like failure and fear. A single wrong move, and failure is right there to greet you with open arms like an old acquaintance, but we keep on running and manage to shake the monkeys off our back.
Sometimes life rewards you with power-ups to make the going easy. We thank the Lord and move on with greater concentration since the Force is with us, and eventually accomplish what we have set out to achieve with great ease.
There will always be obstacles in our path. Life ain't no exponential growth curve. That is what makes life all the more worthwhile. Without challenges and objectives, are we truly living? We don't even know where we're heading to in Temple Run, even the game producers don't know, they're mere mortals like most of us. It's left to the program to decide where to take us, giving us choices of the path to take on the way, just like what we experience in life. We are bound to fail at some point of time, the running may get too fast, or we may be distracted by external/internal factors and fall down.. But then there is always the Run Again option and we get back wiser and with wounds that chicks dig.

Yes, the gloomy asshole is back.

JUST IN! FAKING NEWS.

Caretakers of the Sree Padmanabhaswamy Temple in Trivandrum, India, where gold, jewels and statues worth an estimated $22 billion have been found, have decided to lodge a complaint Imangi Studios, producers of the popular game Temple Run for giving ideas to the people visiting the temple on how to steal the jewels and run. The authorities have had to spend some of the gold to hire mastiffs to chase the the robbers.

"This is very unfortunate, we condemn such games that spoil the mind of the young children and make them experts at avoiding evil monkeys. We have decided to hire wild dogs, since dogs aren't monkeys. The robbers won't get very far" says the head caretaker, while sipping on the tender coconut water. Hearing the comments of the head caretaker, many visitors were heard shouting "Challenge Accepted".

More and more people have started buying track pants and shorts to ensure an easy run, the lungi shops have started to shut down. "Lungis are very uncomfortable and they tend to fall off after a while, spoiling the fun" says an avid Temple Run supporter. The next few days are bound to be eventful. As the roads are getting cleaned up, and pot holes being covered for a smooth run, it will be interesting to see what new defenses the temple authorities set up.

Sometimes I cease being a rock and try being a mortal. Bad idea.

My day revolves around the electronic gadgets lying around my house. From the gravitation field of one, I am miraculously placed in the field of another. Fun time.

Oh and this - http://randomintensified.tumblr.com/
The blog linked is a complete contrast to the URL you see. Enjoy.

This Time, I Know, It's Gone..

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sat, 24 Mar 2012 10:57:00 +0000

So it's overThis time, I know, it's gone

So the board exams have ended. Now the wait for the results.
The cocoon has been built. Took 14 years to do so. 2 more months for the results, will it be a butterfly emerging from the cocoon or a moth? Who knows...
But for now, it's time to enjoy life in the interstice between exams and results.
It is time for me to read the Hunger Games series and watch the movie, and read the Game of Thrones series and watch season 2. It is time to listen to my hair grow.

Why butterflies? Because Unicorns don't exist.

Up in flames

Rahul Legen... wait for it.. Dravid.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Fri, 09 Mar 2012 09:18:00 +0000

Rahul Legen-Dravid.

I know I wasn't supposed to post till 24th March. I know I'll be sent to hell for posting. But it had to be done. I'm sure Hades would understand.

The Wall retired today. No more of Rahul Dravid to save India from humiliation in test matches.

Won't type much. I'm dissolving in chemistry formulas.
But I will leave you with this .gif which I so painfully made. I think .gif's are immortal mainly because they keep playing over and over again. I like .gifs.

"I leave with sadness but also with pride" Dravid.

I could watch you forever.

"No tribute can be enough for Rahul Dravid", Sachin Tendulkar.

Gone Fishing.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Mon, 20 Feb 2012 19:19:00 +0000

This wouldn't come as a shock to you but this will be my last post for a loooong time (extra Os added for emphasis).

Board exams are only 10 sunrises away. I need to ligate myself to a vector with suitable amount of Concentration Ligase and insert the vector to my books. Don't think that even makes sense.
I just had an urge to type vector and ligase.

I keep holding onto youBut I can't bring you back to lifeSing the anthem of the angelsAnd say the last goodbye

May the Force be with us all.

Post Graduation.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 19:40:00 +0000

Graduating feels good. I love the attention. I love the robes. I love looking like a semi-wizard. I hate the hats, they don't fit my head. I like the speeches. I like the post graduation status updates. I like the photos. I like the "I'll miss you", I kinda even like the tear shedding part, even though my tear glands refused to function yesterday. I think I'm turning into a rock, slowly, but surely.
Even though the chief guest's speech had explicit content, it was really good. Good thoughts he has. With him is the force.
The feeling after the tassels were turned is just phenomenal. All the work put in, in surviving school right from nursery to Gr 12 was worth it. A part of me wanted to shout out "I'M A GRADUATE, BITCH", but most of me said, "wait you asshole, boards exams in about 15 days".
Graduating high school is just part 1 of accomplishing life's academic goal. Lots of graduating left to do.

Near death experiences are fun only after they are survived.

Of Hearts and Stuff.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 20:00:00 +0000

14th February, a day dreaded by most. The day brings expectations to those in love and a hopes for a Post Valentine's Day Year with a partner for those who decide to score on 14th Feb.
Personally, I feel Valentine's Day is over hyped. To me, it's just another day. And just like an otherday, it isn't important to me, unless the Indian Cricket Team wins a match, or Sachin Tendulkar scores a century, or I fulfill one of my many dark fantasies.

#foreveralone

One of the many reasons I do not consider 14th February as an important day is because I spend it alone, without a lover to call mine. Its not like I do not have lovers. My lovers love others too. Sometimes more than me. It hurts.

So it seems Valentine's Day is pretty much an epic fail each year. Or is it?

There are many reactions to Valentine's Day as I have observed. I've had to stalk my Facebook and Twitter News Feed for the results.

Some are overjoyed with the fact that they have a Valentine. Even though the person shares the Valentine with numerous other people. These people are just overly enthusiastic about having a Valentine on 14th Feb so that they do not break the unspoken rule of having a partner for a day on 14th Feb. These people, I feel, need a life and a better view of life. Wannabes.
Other people have a perfect, cheesy, lovely, romantic, picture perfect, lovey-dovey Valentine's Day. They do stuff like what we see in a Hollywood movie, causing many a single persons to go green with envy. These couples are the role models for the people described above, the people who need a life.

Other people just celebrate being single. Some of them take it to the extremes. They feel life isn't about being tied up because of the other person. These people, I think, have either broken up recently, or were dumped before anything could kick start. They lead disillusioned lives and end up hating V-Day. I am a hybrid between this type of person and the following person.
Other single guys and gals, live in the Valentine's Day spirit. Hoping for a better next year. Keeping a cheery face, even though the sight of watching their friends go on a mini-honeymoon makes them want to puke their hearts out. These people have an optimistic view of life. I like being optimistic. I count myself as one of them, even though I do not consider V-Day as important.
Another reason, I consider V-day as unimportant is because being a romantic creep, I believe people shouldn't wait for a particular day to express their "love", or whatever they call their affection towards the other person(s).

So a Valentine's day without a date... No big deal. I'm used to it. Imma chill wid ma bitches.. Boo Yeah.

Keeping Mum.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 09:55:00 +0000

Not your mom.

Words and actions have a way of transmitting themselves to unwanted places. Which is why I'll just sit on my couch and let time pass. I'll hibernate. Best.

The Game of Thrones theme song is on the right path to dislodge the Dexter theme song as the best theme song ever.
The Game of Thrones theme song has dislodged the Dexter theme song. It's a revolution.

Just over 24 hours left till I graduate.

"If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it."
Stephen Leacock

Funny name. ^

The Awkward Moment When...

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 14:33:00 +0000

Yesterday, I was awarded for spending most of Gr 12 with books. Being a "Supremo" makes me sound like a large pizza from pizza hut.
During the ceremony, shit happened.
My thoughts varied from wait, what? to WHAT THE FAAACK? to omg, what is happening?, to who? me? and finally to oh, this is gonna be fun.
The awkward moment when I stand next to the CEO of my school with his arm over me for the entire audience to laugh at.
This is what I thought the moment looked like -

After the ceremony, in which people apparently forgot how to clap, or had I gone deaf? Never mind, I'll find someone like you.
OKAY. So after the prize distribution ceremony, I almost had a cardiac arrest at one point of time. A nice feeling though. Beautiful is the word. Why did my heart almost stop beating? You may never know.................. (notice extra full stops and imagine a person looking out a misty window on a misty, winter's night and the screen fades)

Did I enjoy the moment when I was next to the CEO? Yes.
Would I like another "beautiful cardiac arrest" moment? Yes.
Did I like the food? No.

A Reflecting Surface.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 06:18:00 +0000

The person in the mirror is like the two sides of a coin. The person can either convert you into the Green Goblin or be your friend in times of despair. The person inside the mirror can tell you who the fairest of them all is. The mirror can bring back childhood memories, like what happened to Kancha. Kancha ended up breaking any mirror he saw.
The person inside the mirror, or rather the mirror itself can also be the source of a really good song.

Why are we talking to each other again?

I need to be inked.

Path of Fire.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 18:36:00 +0000

I haven't posted for a while now. I had nothing exciting happening in life. Not that anything exciting has taken place today, I just missed the New Post window.

I watched Agneepath today with my family. It had enough bloodshed to gave my mom a headache and Dexter Moran a smile on his face. The movie is a really good one. Hrithik Roshan is boss. Sanjay Dutt could have replaced Ralph Fiennes as Voldemort, all 'Kancha' needed was a wand instead of the cigar.
The movie magically jumps 15 years from one scene to the other, and a young boy playing 'Vijay, transforms into Hrithink Roshan and somehow even changes the colour of his eye from a deep black, like his mother's to a mystical green. No contact lenses, mind you, Just pure magic.
Logic tells us that a person should die if he has his back bone stabbed couple of times and then have his chest slashed with a sickle and then have a blade sticking out of his abdomen for atleast 30 seconds, but if logic had its way, Indian cinema would have missed out on jewels like this -

Overall, Agneepath is is pretty nice movie, there is energy in every scene and the movie keeps you hooked. Wouldn't be surprised if Hrithik Roshan walks away with the various awards up for grabs and if toy companies started making Kancha bobble heads.

The poem, Agneepath is a classic and it makes sense if you can understand the gibberish (Hindi)...

वृक्ष हों भले खड़े

हों घने, हों बड़े

एक पत्र छाँह भी

मांग मत! मांग मत! मांग मत!

अग्निपथ! अग्निपथ! अग्निपथ!

तू न थकेगा कभी

तू न थमेगा कभी

तू न मुड़ेगा कभी

कर शपथ! कर शपथ! कर शपथ!

अग्निपथ! अग्निपथ! अग्निपथ!

यह महान दृश्य है

चल रहा मनुष्य है

अश्रु-स्वेद-रक्त से

लथ-पथ! लथ-पथ! लथ-पथ!

अग्निपथ! अग्निपथ! अग्निपथ!

This is what my horoscope had to say - "Lost in despair and wallowing in self-pity, you may not have noticed that you’ve been creating immense interest in all the right places." Just saying, not drawing any conclusions because who reads the horoscope anyway. I do now. But yea, just saying.....

And -

I would like to call this, my life in words. The girl is there for viewing pleasure.

If you think otherwise,

Drilling open the Vita.

noreply@blogger.com (Daedalus) — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 14:19:00 +0000

As some of you may know, I attended the PS-Vita press launch in Dubai. Yeah, I'm rolling with the big guns now. I was going to update you with the awesomeness that I came across but I was stopped from doing that by my extremely stupid practical exams. We had to dissect flowers in Biology. Do I get an 'Oooooooooh, that's so awesome'? No, I get 'LOL, get a life science dude.' Yes, it's pretty hard to feel good when you've got shit like that going on. Nonetheless, I'm posting a new post (yes, sounds grammatically incorrect, but actually isn't.)

Now, let's explore the Vita shall we?
First off, the technical specs which are more than enough to induce orgasms in the tech loving such as myself.

CPU-ARM^® Cortex™- A9 core (4 core)

GPU-SGX543MP4+

External Dimensions

Approx. 182.0 x 18.6 x 83.5mm (width x height x depth)
(tentative, excludes largest projection)

Screen (Touch Screen)

5 inches (16:9), 960 x 544, Approx. 16 million colors, OLED
Multi touch screen (capacitive type)

Rear Touch Pad

Multi touch pad (capacitive type)

Cameras

Front camera, Rear camera

Sound

Built-in stereo speakers
Built-in microphone

Sensors

Six-axis motion sensing system (three-axis gyroscope,
three-axis accelerometer), Three-axis electronic compass

Location

Built-in GPS
Wi-Fi location service support

Keys / Switches

PS button
Power button
Directional buttons (Up/Down/Right/Left)
Action buttons (Triangle, Circle, Cross, Square)
Shoulder buttons (Right/Left)
Right stick, Left stick
START button, SELECT button
Volume buttons (+/-)

Wireless Communications

Mobile network connectivity (3G)
IEEE 802.11b/g/n (n = 1x1)(Wi-Fi)(Infrastructure mode/Ad-hoc mode)
Bluetooth^® 2.1+EDR (A2DP/AVRCP/HSP)

Yup, you're absolutely right. I copied it from Wikipedia, well who doesn't?

Now, the human part of the specifications.

PS Vita comes in a glossy black guise and it feels just perfect in your hands. As you switch it on, you notice that the familiar XMB is gone. Wait what?
Yup, they've replaced it with a bunch of blobs that at first don't look quite appealing, but then as you delve into it, you notice that it's perfect for your tiny 600 cc brain.

The games, social media and everything else are neatly arranged in the whole place and yes, it includes multi-tasking due to the fact that it has 512 MB of RAM which was a missing feature in it's predecessor the PSP.

The games are crispy with occasional frame-rate drops which will be fixed when the developers come to grips with the SDK of the Vita. The SDK refers to Software Development Kit for the un-initiated over here.

We can play Full HD videos on the Vita without a hitch, thanks to it's quad core processor. What does that mean for you? Well, for one, no FUCKING video converters needed.

Yes, now moving on, the Social Network aspect. Yes, everyone wants to update on the go, yes? Well, Sony's got you covered. It's got both Twitter and Facebook right there in-built. The Twitter app shares striking similarity to the iPad client of Twitter. I expect apps from 3rd-Party developers to come into existence soon.

There's a rear camera and a front camera. We all know that the front camera is for video calling, but what else? Well, it tracks your ugly/handsome face while playing games which require interaction like that.

Plus, an awesome tidbit for those who game online, the PSN versions of games will be cheaper. Yup.

I'll be more detailed next time, really busy. :)

Next post will a video of me, detailing the features. :)

When Dreams Come True.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 11:48:00 +0000

Let me tell you of the time when I played God. Not the entire story, don't want my effigy burning on the streets.
I had a dream. It wasn't an ordinary dream like the one in Biology class. This one was an upgraded version, good graphics, not-so-imaginary sound quality. A dream that came true. (I can hear people saying "what a ba****d". And now, hopefully they have a sly grin on their face, if not, this may be my last post, I'm getting killed.)
Since my vision, as I would like to call it, has come true, I feel powerful. It's a feeling like the one I might get, nay will get when Sachin Tendulkar reaches his 100th ton (which is when a dark skinned Homo sapien will show off his literary skills here), it's like the feeling that I know I'll feel when I get my Hogwarts acceptance letter, it's like being drunk without consuming alcohol.
Unfortunately I wasn't at the right place to witness my vision take place, but I'm sure it would have been like déjà vu.
Another dream came true for me. This one took almost 3 years. I finally managed to score above 75/100 in English. I know you're all thinking- heh, what an arsehole. WHATEVER LOSER! It has not been easy, I had to overcome the shock of a B1 in my Gr 10 boards while some people around me who probably can neither comprehend this post nor can can compose a complex sentence had a shiny A2 or A1 in their report cards. Oh, the humanity. I finally overcame the 75/100 curse, and I felt the same way as described above.

I should dream more often. I should probably expand the list of topics I dream on.

The Indian Cricket Team should win more. Or they would have to face memes like this one -

Courtesy of a boy who found a meme generating site.

And songs like this one -

This should be the team's anthem for now.

I graduate on Valentine's Day. Oh the humanity? Oh awesome, I can save my ForeverAlone T-shirt for the prom? NOOOOOOOO? Vote on the poll.

Adieu Chuck

noreply@blogger.com (Daedalus) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 21:00:00 +0000

Today marks the final episode of Chuck.

I cannot believe that the ride is over. From the lovable Chuck to the comical genius Morgan, it has been amazing to finally find a show that fit my nerdy, geeky and gaming appetite. It has been in a way, a reflection of what we do every single day.

It's the season finale of Season 5 today and it will bring tears. It's like losing a loved one.
And yes, this blog post was short.
It had to be.

To cheer/tear you up, here's an amazing song.

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 17:22:00 +0000

I took my love down to Violet Hill,

There we sat in the snow,

All that time she was silent still,

Said if you love me, won't you let me know?

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.3

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 16:44:00 +0000

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.3

Nobody said it was easy...

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 14:13:00 +0000

The last theory exam is over. High School Graduation Day is approaching fast. So are more exams. More on that later.

Surprisingly, there is nothing for me to do, which is probably why I'm here. (Read : There are loads of things I could be doing right now, but instead I'm not)

I have put on weight because of these exams. Exam weight. Its just like putting on holiday weight, but I have fun putting on holiday weight. On the other hand, I feel like a complete arsehole putting on exam weight. Hvae to burn the extra cals. Till then -

Chris can do no wrong.

I don't even need your love, but you treat me like a stranger...

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 14:15:00 +0000

You're in the Biology class, physically while your mind wanders off to wonderland. You look out of the window with those dreamy eyes and wonder why birds fly, then you wonder how birds fly, then you no longer give a f*ck about birds. Suddenly a good looking girl falls into your class. Just falls in. You don't care why or how. She steadies herself, makes up her hair and shows off her curves. You ask her out at that very instance, no longer caring about the consequences of leaving a class right when the interesting topic of why birds fly is being discussed. You don't care. You like watching classmates with their mouths wide open in shock. One classmate was just yawning, you give him the look and he keeps his mouth wide open in shock and disbelief. The next thing you know, you're half way around the world making sweet love to your new girlfriend. Then suddenly you here a scream, your hips stop. Fear creeps in. You're shaken and you wake up. The sunlight stares right into your pupils, blinding you. You here voices, a woman shouting your name, you feel like you're slipping back to love making, instead you're struck right between your eyes by what you see as a missile. You're back in class. You try to slip back into the dream. The girl never returns. You hope she does when you sleep during the next class. You do sleep, she isn't there. You cut your hand. You didn't even know her name. She's just somebody you used to know.

I wish I was the sun.
I wouldn't let you live.

Ben 10 is illogical. I still watch it though. Pokemon rules!!!!!!

My last theory exam in school is coming up. What have I been doing all this while? Thinking about why birds fly and creating fantasy worlds during class? Pathetic.

#SOPASTRIKE

noreply@blogger.com (Akshith Dass) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 14:26:00 +0000

I'm on a strike. I am not going shout slogans, not going to come up with rhymes to diss the cause I'm opposing, not going to carry placards, not going to get beaten up by sticks. I'll just blackout.

If SOPA is passed, I may use the computer only to beat my own high score on pinball. The internet will be like my brain... Useless.

An online strike is the shizz. w00t!