Having to ask for professional help does not mean you have failed as a caregiver.  It means you are attuned to the needs of your loved one and yourself.  It is important to recognize your limitations and take into consideration your own health and the well-being of others in your family.  A good caregiver will consider all options.

Most communities have a number of different services available for caregivers and seniors.  The cost is often based on ability to pay and can be covered by insurance.  Different services that should be considered are adult day care, home health aides, respite care/ visits, transportation services, errand services, and skilled nursing care.

Professional help is not a sign of failure, it is a conduit to helping preserve the caregiving relationship allowing your personal relationship with your aging loved one thrive.

Here is a list of resources to consider:

National Adult Day Services Association: http://www.nadsa.org/

National Alzheimer’s Organization: http://www.alz.org/index.asp

Family Caregiver Alliance: http://www.caregiver.org/caregiver/jsp/home.jsp

Online Resources at Caring.com: http://www.caring.com/articles/family-caregiver-respite

If you would like to discuss additional professional services, please feel free to contact us at Sarahcare at (800) 472-5544.  We can help you find either an adult day services program that might work for you and your loved one, or we can provide you with local resources in your area.

Here are 10 tips for how to ask for the help you need when caring for an aging loved one.

1. Call them directly on the phone or sit down together and talk about what is going on.
2. Think about all the things you do around the house such as laundry, bill paying, doctor visits, medication pickups, etc. Most of these things can be delegated to a neighbor or friend once a week.
3. Be specific: Discuss the specific needs such as a grocery run once a week.
4. Ask a family member how they think they can best help:  If they live far away, they could perhaps help with online bills?  There may be an area where they want to jump in.
5. Take the time to explain how things should be done:  Be detailed about what is needed.  Do not assume that your new helper knows.
6. Be patient:  You may feel that it is easier to do it yourself, but try to be patient with the helper and know they will figure it out sooner if you do not just step in and take over.
7. Talk to them about the person you are caring for:  What do they like or dislike.  Do loud noises bother them? Do they enjoy music or books?
8. Be thankful: Show them how grateful you are for their help.  Simply sending a little note that says how much you really appreciate them stepping in and helping out will go a long way.
9. Practice in front of a mirror:  Just like giving a speech, it can be very useful to sit in front of the mirror and practice how you want to approach your friend or neighbor when asking for help.
10. Be honest about your feelings:  Most people appreciate honesty.  If you are feeling overwhelmed and need someone to help, just tell them exactly that. Everyone wants to help avoid crisis, so it is important to just be honest about your workload and share your feelings.

For more information about either caregiver burnout or asking for help, feel free to follow us on twitter or become a fan at Facebook.

Unfortunately we also see the cost associated with this kind of devotion.  Caregivers suffer from depression and anxiety.  They often neglect their own personal needs.  Many caregivers experience caregiver burn-out… a serious physical and emotional condition that affects both the caregiver and the senior loved one.

Have Coffee with a Friend

But, did you know there is a secret to being a great caregiver?  You may be surprised to hear that the secret involves caring for yourself first.  It sounds almost too good to be true.  But studies have shown that caregivers who spend some time each day caring for themselves are actually better able to provide care and support to the one in need.  Of course, this may be easier said than done.  So, as the New Year approaches, we want to help you get started.

In our series this month, we will be focusing on what Caregivers can do to take care of themselves.  Here is a list of THREE New Year Resolutions which you can do that will make you a great caregiver.  We will go into more depth on each of these resolutions over the next few weeks.

ASK FOR HELP

Just do it… ask your friends, family and neighbors for a little help.  You can do it.  Just walk next door, knock on the door and ask that friendly neighbor if she could help you.  It can be something simple like… provide a meal once a month.  Or perhaps stay at your house for a few hours while you run personal errands.  You will be surprised how people really do want to help, but don’t know how. All you have to do is ask.

SEEK HELP FROM A PROFESSIONAL

No, this does not mean you have failed as a caregiver.  This means you are human and need to get a little perspective.  One out of 5 people in the US are family caregivers.  It is one of the most stressful jobs on the planet.  It is OK to seek professional help from a family counselor, social worker or even your doctor.  Tell them what is going on.  Having someone just listen to you and provide you with a little professional advice will go a long way.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

It is vitally important that caregivers spend a little time taking care of themselves.  This can be as simple as taking a quiet bath alone, sneaking off to read a magazine, or making plans to grab a coffee with a friend.  This goes back to the first resolution… ask for help.  Just ask a family member, friend or neighbor to come over for a few hours so that you can spend a little time each week taking care of yourself.  Better yet, look into other solutions such as adult day care.

Sarahcare adult day care is committed to helping family caregivers be GREAT caregivers.   Feel free to contact us at anytime and we would be happy to just listen, provide support to you and help you with all your caregiving needs.

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS FOR CAREGIVERS

Being a family caregiver is a tough job.  Especially during the holidays when we are expected to not only care for our aging loved one who may have dementia or Alzheimer’s disease, but also to care for the rest of the family.  There is extra shopping, cleaning, cooking and entertaining to do throughout the season.  Caregivers rarely get a chance to look at their own needs.  For January though, we want all family caregivers to slow down and take a deep breath and think about their own needs for a change.   This month Sarahcare adult day care will be offering a support series called RESOLUTIONS FOR FAMILY CAREGIVERS.  In this series we will focus on providing simple and realistic encouragement to caregivers to help them find the support they need to avoid caregiver burnout and better manage their own needs.  Tune in each week in January as we provide you with the best solutions to help you have a very Happy New Year.

Family caregivers who are responsible for caring for a person with dementia or Alzheimer’s disease face an ongoing struggle of how to best provide care and support.  It is challenging to find appropriate and stimulating activities for their loved one. Often the television is used as a babysitting option, however, not only is this a mind-numbing activity, it also prevents the senior from gaining any feelings of self-worth or meaning. Many caregivers do everything for the elderly person (cooking, cleaning and other chores), thereby creating a situation of over- dependency. It is important for the caregiver to encourage the person with dementia to do as much for him/herself as long as possible in order to maintain dignity and personal self-worth.

Activities which Provide Meaning to our Lives

• Intellectual Activities–activities which stimulate the mind

• Creative Activities–such as music or art which can enhance memory

• Personal Care Activities–such as dressing, brushing one’s teeth, or brushing one’s hair

• Functional Activities–such as setting the table, folding wash, sweeping the floor, washing windows

• Physical Activities–such as walking, chair exercise

• Social Activities–having refreshments, or caring about others in similar situations

• Spiritual Activities-singing hymns or listening to music of the 1940’s

Benefits of Activities for Seniors with Dementia

The purpose of activities for a person with dementia are not just to help fill the time and keep our loved one busy, but include a number of different benefits as follows:

• Encourage expression of feelings

• Maintain connections with outside world

• Encourage independence and promote self-esteem

• Enhance the quality of life • Maintain physical well-being

• Encourage socialization • Bring some fun into the day

• Encourage use of remaining abilities

• Provide intellectual stimulation

Choice is Important for Seniors with Dementia

It is important to help your loved one to feel empowered by allowing them choice and control. This is not always easy with someone who has more severe dementia, but providing as much choice as possible will help your loved one feel valued. The choices can be simple such as what type of flowers to choose for a flower arrangement. What color napkins to use when setting the table, etc.

Activities Caregivers can do at Home with a Senior with Dementia

FOLDING CLOTHES TOGETHER

Functional Activities around the house:

• Help with sorting laundry

• Folding clothes

• Collecting the mail

• Planning the meals

• Choosing breakfast cereal

• Watering plants

• Making beds

• Vacuuming the house

• Sweeping the porch

Creative activities:

• Making table decorations

• Flower arranging (choosing the flowers)

• Making and decorating greeting cards

• Creating holiday decorations

• Baking (choosing the type of cookies to bake)

• Gardening (choosing the type of plants to plant)

• Singing (choosing a CD they like)

• Arranging photos in an album

Intellectual activities:

• Playing dice or card games

• Word games from the newspaper

• Reading the newspaper

• TV game shows like Wheel of Fortune together

• Board games with the family

• Online memory games

• Simple math problems (how much to spend on groceries, etc)

Physical activities:

• Walking in the garden or park

• Arm chair stretching

• Lightly tossing a balloon back and forth (stretches arms, and improves eye hand coordination)

• Walking at the grocery store together

The job of a family caregiver is never-ending. To help ease some of the caregiver stress, be sure to include your loved one in as much of your day as possible. You might be surprised by how much they can do to help out around the house. Things might not be done perfectly, but you are not only getting some additional help, you are also providing your loved one with meaningful and purposeful activity to help them feel valued and in control. These are great feelings to have for someone whose world is slowly slipping out of their control.

This relatively new cultural phenomenon is rather sad because when generations are able to be together, both young and old benefit.  A great deal of research has conclusively demonstrated the clear positive outcomes when the generations have the opportunity to interact on a regular basis.   Children are able to experience connections that impact them for a lifetime.  Seniors are able to interact in a way that keeps my both physically and mentally stimulated thereby improving their health and wellbeing.

Some more specific benefits of Intergenerational interactions include:

Benefits for Seniors:

-          Enhanced socialization

-          Increased emotional support

-          Improved physical well being

-          Stimulated learning and improved cognitive functioning

Benefits for Youth:

-          Improved academic performance

-          Enhanced social skills

-          Improved positive behavior

-          Increased emotional stability

Intergenerational activities with Seniors with dementia

Researchers Shannon Jarrott, PhD, and Kelly Bruno, MSW, found that older adults with dementia maintain their ability to interact appropriately with children.  Dr. Merle Griff, author of Linkages, is a long time advocate and educator on the importance and value of intergenerational activities.  She stated in her 1996 research that it is important to find meaningful activities that are engaging for both generational groups.   Many families depend on outside support services, such as adult day care, to help their aging loved one.  These programs, such as Sarahcare, offer structured intergenerational activities several times a week to help their participants experience meaningful and purposeful activity.  Various intergenerational activities can include:

-          Cooking

-          Reading

-          Gardening

-          Story sharing

-          Art

-          Games

-          Music

Recently, radio show, Wriggling in the Middle, interviewed Kari Berit, author of An Unexpected Caregiver, suggested a broad range of activities that can help the generations reconnect in positive ways: scrapbooking, travel, mentoring, even writing a book.

As our society ages, it becomes even more relevant that we think about how to include our generations together in creative and meaningful ways.  Intergenerational activities bring together individuals of different ages to explore, study, and work towards a shared goal with meaningful purpose. Finding the time to share activities together fosters cooperation and promotes interaction among the generations.  For more information on Intergenerational programs, contact Sarahcare Adult Day Care.

Do not despair… there are some easy activity options that will benefit your loved one without stressing out the caregiver.

Music Therapy Benefits for Seniors with Dementia:

Music for Seniors

We have mentioned it before in our series on Activities and Seniors, but is worth mentioning again.  Music therapy has a profound effect on seniors with dementia by helping to improve their concentration and awareness, reducing stress and tension, improving coordination, lowering blood pressure and improving memory and recall.  Here are a few music activities you can do with your aging loved one.

-          Sing along while making meals or driving in the car

-          Reminiscent music: playing old time songs that help raise the spirits

-          Name that tune game: ask your loved one to name the artist or song title

-          Rhythm games: Use musical instruments like shakers, bells, or tambourines.

-          Exercise, stretch or creative movement to rhythmic music

Art Therapy Benefits for Seniors with Dementia:

Studies show that seniors who participate in art can improve their symptoms associated with dementia.  Art can help a person with dementia express their feelings and frustrations, while the creative process improves self-esteem.  Here are a few art ideas you do at home.

-          Coloring

-          Make geometric patterns using shapes

-          Floral arranging

-          Clay formation

-          Water coloring/ painting

-          Pottery painting

-          Baking

-          Photography

Memory Games for Seniors with Dementia:

Today there are plenty of computer based memory games available to seniors with dementia.  Most of these games are designed to help stimulate the brain in different ways, sort of like exercise for the body, but instead you are exercising your brain.  Not all brain games are computerized though.  There are a number of games you can do together with your aging loved one.

-          Memory Jogging Puzzles: Based on old Saturday Evening Post covers

-          Dice games: Farkel is a great dice game

-          Board games: Bingo is a classic

-          Word games: crossword puzzles and word jumbles

-          Trivia games: so many themes to choose from including art trivia, geography, political, celebrity, food, music, etc.

Resources for Activities for Seniors with Dementia:

Here is a great list of resources to help you get started.

Music therapy resources:

-          Music for Memory Improvement

-          Music for exercise and physical fitness

-          Music for relaxing and calming

-          For Old Time Music Sing a longs (Golden Oldies)

-          Fun rhythm musical instruments (Variety pack)

Art Therapy Resources:

-          Senior Ark: Links and resources for all sorts of crafts

-          Craft Bits: Craft ideas that are simple

Memory Games Resources:

-         Senior Boutique: Tons of games for seniors

-         AARP Online Games: The AARP has a lot of brain fitness games online

In addition to the resources above, adult day care is an excellent option that provides daily art, music and cognitive activities to seniors who have dementia and Alzheimers.  Be sure to check out Sarahcare for more resource ideas.

Art for Seniors

As the holiday season approaches, family caregivers who are responsible for managing the care of an aging loved one, often find themselves under additional pressure to create a family atmosphere of holiday peace and joy. At Sarahcare, we know that keeping peace and joy in the house during family gatherings with an aging loved one who may have dementia or Alzheimer’s disease can be near impossible.  One of the biggest challenges is finding family activities that are appealing to different generations with varying interests and integrating extended family who may not understand the unique care giving issues or the special needs of your aging loved one.   However, with just a little pre-planning, a great deal of stress can be avoided and family time together can be times that are long treasured.

Activities for Seniors with Dementia

The holidays can become very disruptive to a senior with dementia.  Little things like moving furniture around to accommodate special gatherings, hanging holiday decorations throughout the house, and having friends and neighbors visit can add stress to someone who is already working hard to navigate the world as they know it.  However, it is inevitable that you will have family gatherings during the holidays, so it is important to be sensitive to your loved one’s special needs and try not to overwhelm them with too much change.  With that in mind, the holidays do provide opportunities to create memories together for the whole family.  Here is a great list of family fun activities geared to support someone with dementia:

1. Art for Seniors: Seniors participating in art programs visit the doctor less often and take fewer medications and for some reason, have stronger immune systems.  The holidays are a great time to make holiday decorations together.  Simple things like cutting paper snowflakes can be fun for young and old alike.  Make holiday cards together cutting out pictures from old cards.  Create gift tags, by cutting out images from wrapping paper. String popcorn together.  Make a holiday floral arrangement together.  Be sure to include younger family members to help with these activities, so that the primary caregiver can focus on other holiday responsibilities.  Take advantage of the extra help.

2. Music Therapy: Music has been used for years to help seniors with dementia improve their memory and sense of self.  Nostalgic music such as war time or holiday music helps evoke positive feelings and memories and taps into emotions.   Seniors that participate in music programs and activities have improved moods, better memory recall, and greater word fluency.  Find opportunities during the holidays to sing together in the car or while making dinner or entertaining.  Include grandkids in holiday singing as well.

3. Memory Games: The holidays are a great time to share past memories together.  Talk with your loved one about their childhood holiday traditions or memories.  Encourages others in the family to work on a crossword puzzle together with your senior loved one.  Read stories from a magazine and then talk together about the story.

Creative Activities for Seniors and the Family

Seniors who have an opportunity to be creative on a regular basis have reduced stress, improved concentration, better moods, and lower blood pressure.  For seniors who have age related physical challenges or who may have had a stroke and have speech difficulties and restricted mobility can find creative activities offer a new means of communicating.  There are a plethora of creative outlets to explore with your aging loved one including writing life stories together, making memory books, creative gift giving during the holidays, planning a garden, bird watching, water coloring, gift wrapping, baking holiday treats, or small woodworking projects.  Encouraging your elder to make choices is key to improved self-esteem and empowerment.  Simple choices like what kind of cookies to make, or what flowers should be included in the flower arrangement can have a great impact.

Inter-generational Activities

The generational gap becomes pretty obvious during the holidays when younger grandkids are visiting.  Bridge the generational gap by doing family activities together, such as playing cards, taking a car ride, going through an album, listening to music or drawing together.  Inter-generational activities can have profound effects on both the younger and the older generations.  Family caregivers, who are in the “sandwich generation” and find themselves caring for an aging loved one while also caring for children at home, treasure the days when everyone in the house finds activities they enjoy doing together.   The benefits include improved sense of community and sense of self worth, as well as more social opportunities and deeper personal connections.   A great resource is Kari Berit, author of the Unexpected Caregiver, who talks about creative family activities.  She recently appeared on the radio show, “Wriggling in the Middle”.  She has a ton of ideas in this “Wriggling in the Middle Radio Show interview”. 

Family Activity Outings with a Senior with Dementia

There are many family outings you can do together with a senior who may have dementia or Alzheimer’s, however, it is important to be aware of your aging loved ones unique needs and limitations… some outings can be overwhelming to a senior with Alzheimer’s disease, but might be just the ticket for a senior who feels isolated and lonely at home.  Many religious centers such as churches and synagogues have special family activities during the holidays including music programs, or charity programs the entire family can enjoy.  Call your library, they often have reading programs for young children and would welcome grandparents to come along.  They also have lecture programs on travel and nature geared for the family.  Senior centers offer holiday lunch programs, daily card games and family movie nights.  We know it can be challenging going out with an aging loved one who has dementia because of the extra stimulus and possibility of outbursts, so one tip that could help is when you do go out to dinner, ask to be seated in a quieter part of the restaurant where you can quickly exit or find a restroom if needed.  Avoid being seated in the center of a noisy restaurant.   When attending a performance, sit next to the aisle so you can easily leave if needed.  Think ahead about your loved one’s special needs and make sure you are not taking them to a place that will be too overwhelming.

Focus on the Family not the To Do List

As the holidays approach, we often find ourselves bogged down in the day to day details of the season.  However as we start to focus on our “to do list” we actually lose our focus on what is important…family.  So family caregivers, when you take a moment to breath, think about what simple activities you could integrate into your family’s lifestyle that would benefit your aging loved one’s health and well-being.  You may be surprised that the senior in your life is not the only one who reaps the benefits.

At Sarahcare Adult Day Care, we care for seniors with many different chronic conditions and we understand the special needs of seniors with dementia.  If you are struggling during the holidays, please feel free to contact a center near you.

The holiday season can be the best of times and the worst of times. With family gathered together, you are reminded again why it’s all worthwhile. But, as a family caregiver, the additional work of cooking, organizing & entertaining can make it incredibly stressful. If you are caring for an aging parent or loved one, it can be particularly challenging. How can everyone come together as they always have with your loved one’s special needs? How can you still accommodate your family’s holiday traditions and routines? How will you plan and fill the additional time you will spend together? The season can be both potentially wonderful and overwhelming. That is why we will be writing about family and senior activities from Thanksgiving to the New Year.

In our caregiver’s blog we will talk about intergenerational activities that involve grandparents and grandchildren as well as creative activities including music and art therapy that can inspire and reduce stress. Our series will include helpful tips for going out including restaurants, religious services, movies, & cultural events because the whole family gets cabin fever. In our Chronic Care Reconsidered blog, for healthcare professionals, we will look at activities for dementia as well as special ways to accommodate chronic illnesses such as stroke in activities & family interactions.

Being together is the heart of family. You shouldn’t have to resign your family to the passivity of the television because of the demands of aging. Caregiver stress can peak at this time to put it gently. We will talk frankly about caregiving: the practical issues, the emotional despair and burden you may feel, and real world tips we use with our own families at Sarahcare, Adult Day Care. Even find a little humor in it for you —-and joy for your family. Of course we want to hear from you. Comment on our blog, join the conversation on twitter at #senioractivity, or share on Facebook. At Sarahcare, we want family caregivers to know you are not alone… we are all in this together.

Seniors with Diabetes can Enjoy Healthy Snacks

As a family caregiver, helping your aging loved one manage their diabetes is a daily effort.  If your aging loved one is stubborn or perhaps experiencing dementia, the effort can become a battle.  During the holidays it is more complicated with the deluge of candy and sweets that seem to surround the house.   All your well-meaning friends and neighbors love to drop off plates of cookies and candies during the holidays as a way of showing they care; exasperating the battle and creating a full on sugar war.

Tips for Managing Senior Diabetic Diets

During the holidays family caregivers must be prepared and armed in order to win the holiday sugar war.    Here are a few tips to help you manage your aging loved one’s diabetic diet.

1.       Plan ahead and avoid crisis:  If you know your aging loved one adores pie and it will be served that evening, plan ahead with the medications and meals so that your loved one can have a piece of pie.

2.       Encourage others to drop off healthy treats:  Nut trays and veggie platters are great!

3.       Have healthy snack available around the kitchen and house:  Make sure you have healthy snacks available and on hand all the time.  (See below for ideas)

4.       Keep a few treats out in a dish:  Don’t deny all sweets, but manage the temptation by keeping 3 or 4 chocolates on a plate rather than keeping a whole bowlful of chocolates out on the table.

5.       Portion Control:  Help manage the portions during the holidays.  Over-indulging during the holidays can be a problem, but you can help your aging loved one to enjoy holiday treats by managing the portions.

6.       Deliver Healthy Snacks: If your aging loved one attends a senior center or an adult day care center, deliver a diabetic friendly healthy holiday snack to the center.  Make sure to talk to care providers about your loved one’s diet during the holidays.

Alternative Food Ideas for Seniors with Diabetes

Feeling uninspired?  Here are a few alternative food options that you may want to try.

-     Frozen grapes: Toss them into a zipper bag and freeze them, they make a refreshing and sweet treat

-     Almonds: Low in fat and high in protein

-     Low fat string cheese: Portable and rich in protein

-    Frozen fudge pops: Sweet and chocolate tasting, but low in calories

-    Black bean salsa with baked veggie chips: Crunchy alternative to high fat tortilla chips and salsa

-    Veggie plate with low fat yogurt dip: Stick with low starch veggies like broccoli and snap peas

-    Popcorn: Watch a favorite holiday flick with the family while snacking on popcorn

-    Single serving sugar free Jell-O: This is always a fun treat for young and old

-    Sugar free hot coco: Perfect for those chilly evenings

-    Veggies and hummus: Another high protein and tasty snack

-    Strawberries and dark chocolate:  Drizzle fresh berries with a little dark chocolate (lowest in sugar) for a special holiday treat

Do you have any holiday food ideas or recipes you would like to share with us?  Please tell us so we can share them before the holiday season kicks into full swing.