tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4097821556553556002024-08-28T11:27:55.968+01:00hedonist masochist feminist muses on power, desire, violence, conflict, battle of wills, and struggles both internal and externaloverpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-50832541971458572882008-12-06T11:20:00.012+00:002008-12-06T14:30:14.869+00:00

We're heavy breathing and hot fumbling on the bed and he's hard against me and I know we could fuck again and I would come and he would come and it would be so good, such intense pleasure, everything working like it should and suffusing us both with wonderful sensation and then lying there in warm drifting loving bliss.So why do I want to make him angry? Why do I push him off me, sit up, casually

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-81904548431037842542008-10-23T18:19:00.007+01:002009-01-31T11:21:20.605+00:00

What is it that makes one fantasy (scenario/category of images/set of words) work one day, and not another? What is it about the real-life context that determines which particular thing it is that's going to send you over the edge this time?Because it is, precisely, determined: in the sense of involuntary, unconscious, produced and constrained by factors that are outside your control. Except

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-61862859655373325062008-10-23T17:51:00.003+01:002008-10-23T17:58:11.744+01:00

He said I understand for the first time why it's called 'making love'. Such a cheesy phrase, and yet...He said when I feel those ripples, all those tiny tremors and squeezes, I understand what it means to be loved by your cunt.He said, when we're fucking, and you hold my arm, or grab me, when you bite or kiss any bit of my skin that comes near your mouth, it's like being wrapped up in love.He

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-86084105639902988422007-09-26T11:33:00.000+01:002007-09-26T13:22:37.287+01:00

I'm not at all sure about labelling myself 'a sub'. Calling myself a masochist seems straightforward, because I enjoy being hurt, but submissive? I dunno.There's the old question of 'who's really in charge?'. And I think I may well be 'a reaction top' in the sense that I like to provoke and control the man who's supposedly dominating me, by torturing him with his own desire to hurt/fuck me.Of

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-65925452514061389182007-09-22T18:24:00.002+01:002008-10-23T19:01:59.493+01:00

[17:45] you've got an interesting twist on sub dom[17:45] you're very into causing reactions[17:45] yeah[17:46] bloody laughter woman was talking about being a reaction top [17:47] I think i'm more into being made to react, as i'm a bit reserved normally[17:47] a reaction top, hmm interesting[17:47] (or unable to react)[17:47] yeah i definitely want to MAKE them do stuff to me . to provoke [17:47

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-29082494992230877822007-09-21T16:35:00.001+01:002007-09-21T20:01:58.953+01:00

Growing up in London, there were certain places we went to regularly - London Zoo, the National Gallery, the Science Museum, etc. One of my favourites was Madame Tussauds. From an adult perspective, it's a cheesy, overpriced, overcrowded tourist trap, and when I was 16 and obnoxious I used to take great pleasure in strolling down Baker Street past the queues of American and Japanese tourists and

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-35718582932234750582007-09-17T14:16:00.000+01:002007-09-17T22:27:06.723+01:00

R and I drive a long way to visit D. It's been nearly a year since we saw him. B is coming too, from a different city. I don't allow myself to believe that he'll turn up: I don't want to be disappointed. But there he is, looking strangely smart and unlikely in his work clothes.When B and I first reunite on Friday we are polite and keep our distance, physically and emotionally. He kisses me

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-50989533631545760532007-09-14T16:31:00.000+01:002007-09-17T14:18:10.405+01:00

When I was little, around the ages of 7-10, I was slightly obsessed with car crashes, injury, comas, and paralysis. As far as I can remember, this fascination started when I watched a crap TV movie in which a young girl was hit by a car and left paralysed. It must be twenty years since I saw it (blimey) but I can still remember the scene in which she was hit. She's crossing the road, carelessly,

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-59048016699143006472007-09-08T01:47:00.000+01:002007-09-17T14:18:29.113+01:00

In feminist writings, I've often encountered the argument that the emphasis on cumshots in porn is purely for male gratification: that it provides confirmation of his potency and his orgasm and disregards the woman's pleasure.I can understand this view to a certain extent. Generally speaking, it's not that exciting to have someone ejaculate on you. [Notwithstanding my occasional bukkake-style

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-28318384677170847852007-09-01T15:12:00.000+01:002007-09-05T19:09:45.689+01:00

It's a cliche that sex is better when it's wrong. But I understand it. Because, if you shouldn't do something, but you still end up doing it, you must really really want to.It's come into play a lot recently with B. For him, every aspect of his desire for me is wrong. It makes him feel bad and guilty. And that turns me on. A lot. Not so much the real-life badness when it starts to fuck up our

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-28494021892460982932007-08-31T22:50:00.000+01:002007-09-01T15:10:57.981+01:00

02:40:33 yeah 02:41:05 think it's a possibly misogynistic control thing. Just want to hold you down and keep you down and please myself 02:41:26 shut me up 02:41:31 and use me 02:41:56 yeah, stop you...talking back. Or something. Just take what I want from you. 02:42:32 i have a very distinct memory of my face pushed against brick.. a wall maybe.. damp from the rain 02:42:48 and

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-46263588276763608262007-08-25T23:22:00.000+01:002007-09-08T02:04:30.407+01:00

B seduces me with words. There is, as he said, a 'powerful mutual physical attraction', but that isn't what does it. When my mind wanders, when I'm struck by a memory that makes my stomach go suddenly hollow, it's verbal. I remember stuff he's said: jokes, compliments, statements about what he'd like to do to me, how I make him feel, replaying real encounters we've had. We meet up and we start to

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-409782155655355600.post-30652744063375775462007-08-25T22:26:00.000+01:002007-08-31T15:48:31.190+01:00

Inspired by the incomparable Bitchy Jones, I've decided to try to write about sex. Well, not sex exactly; I'm not intending to give lots of gory details. More to try to thrash out (ho ho) the stuff that goes on in my head and why some things turn me on so much.I found myself on a train the other day, coming back from a work-type thing. Beautiful countryside outside, water and bridges and hills. I

overpoweredhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09955220523453412599noreply@blogger.com0