What is My Quitting Point?

• Have I decided my addiction is too strong?
• Am I tired of putting forth the energy, time, money and focus?
• Have I settled that I’m as good as I care to get?
• Am I hopeless that I will ever live without this battle?
• Do I give up because my timelines aren’t met?

Reasons Not To Quit

• I will have to start over again some day
• This is how I grow trust in myself to reach my goals
• Feeling weak is not an excuse to quit
• My deficits show me where I need more, and perhaps different support
• A break-through may be just around the corner
• When I push through, I will see different views and direction

 How to Keep Going

• Relinquish my agenda and timeline for what is
• Surrender what I think is right
• Accept that there are no shortcuts
• Detach from my fears of failure
• Acknowledge my successes
• Look at the big picture; this challenge does not define me
• Find enjoyment in the journey

1. I accept who you are
2. You have accomplished a lot
3. I adore you
4. You are so adventurous
5. I love your affection
6. I anticipate being with you
7. I accept you
8. You are authentic
9. You are approachable
10. You are self-assured
11. You are so well balanced
12. I see your inner beauty
13. You are doing your best
14. I believe in you
15. You will always belong to me
16. You were so brave
17. That took courage
18. You have an inner calm
19. There’s no one more capable
20. Your cheerfulness in contagious
21. You are charming
22. I love your closeness
23. It’s easy to talk to you
24. You bring me comfort
25. That was compassionate
26. You have great follow through
27. You keep your commitments
28. I love your clarity on this issue
29. You are a compassionate person
30. You keep your composure
31. You are considerate
32. You live by your convictions
33. Your contribution really helped
34. You are so creative
35. Your curiosity opens up new ideas
36. You are brilliant
37. I trust your decisions
38. You are delightful
39. I love your determination
40. I value you
41. I care about your feelings
42. That takes devotion
43. You energize me
44. I am inspired by you
45. You are really effective
46. You encouraged me
47. I enjoy your company
48. You are really expressive
49. You are faithful
50. I’m fascinated by you
51. You are fearless
52. You are physically fit
53. You have great focus
54. You are fun
55. You are generous
56. I see your goodness
57. You are growing
58. I am happy being with you
59. I can see your heart
60. I appreciate your help
61. That was helpful
62. I love your sense of humor
63. You are honest
64. I hear you
65. You really made in impact
66. You seem motivated
67. You made a difference
68. You are a loyal friend
69. You are a mindful person
70. Your are genuine
71. You are great
72. I love your openness
73. You see the glass half full
74. You live passionately
75. You know how to persevere
76. You are playful
77. It’s a pleasure to know you
78. You have great poise
79. You use tact
80. You stand in your power
81. I have a sense of peace with you
82. Your prepared
83. You are proactive
84. You are reasonable
85. Your are fair
86. I can count on your reliability
87. You are resilient
88. That took great restraint
89. You have wonderful self-control
90. That was a selfless thing to do
91. You have a bright spirit
92. That was thoughtful
93. I trust you
94. You are truthful
95. You are understanding
96. You are unique
97. I’m intrigued by you
98. You are a virtuous person
99. You are warm
100. I love your willingness

Love is a combination of feelings towards someone or something.

Feelings are driven by emotions and are not always a reflection of reality. We control our feelings by our perception of reality.  Because of this, we have the power to produce the loving feelings we desire.

Since love is a FEELING, you can learn to BUMP UP YOUR LOVE LEVEL IN MERE MINUTES  

Here are a few ways to take in the love around you.

1. EXPECTATIONS: Catch expectations of other people loving you, into a cue to start loving yourself
2. FORGIVENESS: Identify hurt feelings you may have from a person, and actively forgive them by seeing their innocence.  Believe they have your best in mind. Forgive people for their actions towards you and for the hurt it caused you.  Forgive yourself too.
3. VICTIM: Release feeling like a victim.  Reclaim your power by taking responsibility for filling your own cup with loving yourself.
4. GRATITUDE:  Consciously make a list of gratitude’s for those in your life who love you. Identify their actions that made you feel loved.  Give gratitude for strangers and nature.  Even strangers who smile at you and the beautiful morning sky are sending you love.
5. DISTRACTION:  Getting out of the spiraling feelings of disappointment can require distraction to ‘Reset” the situation.  Find a way to get out of your heart and back into your head.  Read, take a walk, enjoy a different conversation, or call a friend, move the furniture or turn on the TV.

 Motivation is an internal job.  It has to do with your desire and willingness to do something. 

 Do you feel resistance to doing something you’ve set out to do?  Then, it’s time for a fresh infusion of motivation!

1. Why?  get back to the “why?”.  Why do you want this in the first place? What will you have once you reach this goal?
2. Simplify.  Cut out the complex strategies, and get back to basics.
3. Forgive yourself.  You’re not perfect, and your progress will be at a human pace.
4. Give up shortcuts.  If there was a shortcut, you would have found it by now.  Settle in that this journey may take some time.
5. Let Go. Throw out unrealistic expectations that tell you that you’re not good enough, inspired enough or capable enough to accomplish your goal.
6. Stop it.  If you hate what you’re doing, stop.  Find another way that is inspiring and enjoyable.
7. Watch your words.  Your words reflect your beliefs.  Re-frame “I cant’s” into ways “I can”.
8. Make time.  How much time each day do you focus on reaching your goal?  If it’s one hour, stretch it by 15 minutes.  You will become what you focus on.
9. Get honest.  Get real with yourself and your efforts.  Self- sabotage happens when you excuse your small actions that deviate from the plan.
10. Don’t go it alone. You can never have enough support!  Surround yourself with experts, mentors, books, inspirational quotes, vision boards, YouTube videos, friends, support groups, accountability partners and whatever inspires you.

Forgiving MYSELF heals me more than forgiving THOSE who hurt me

• I forgive myself for divulging in negative emotions
• I forgive myself for forgetting I have power over my destiny and dreams
• I forgive myself for not seeing my goodness
• I forgive myself for valuing another’s opinion of me over my own
• I forgive myself for time spent building evidence  and blame against another
• I forgive myself for losing focus
• I forgive myself for my expectations that I need to be right and perfect

1. I speak my mind rather than going along with others
2. I am clear about what I  know and thinking comes easily for me
3. I am surrounded with people who are good for me
4. I make decisions easily
5. I am not oversensitive to criticism
6. I don’t easily get involved in others problems
7. I feel satisfied and a sense of fulfillment in life
8. I prefer to do what I believe and not what others tell me to do
9. I am not afraid of change and can navigate it successfully
10. I experience disappointment and sadness but get over it rather quickly
11. I spend my time on things I like rather than over-helping in others situations
12. I can ask for what I need

1. A Goal Without A Plan Is Just A Wish- Larry Elder
2. If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things. –  Albert Einstein
3. The ability to convert ideas to things is the secret to outward success. – Henry Ward Beecher
4.  Obstacles are things a person sees when he takes his eyes off his goals. – Joseph Crossman
5. My philosophy of life is that if we make up our mind what we are going to make of our lives, then work hard toward that goal, we never lose- somehow we win out. – Ronald Regan
6. Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal. – F. Nietzsche
7. A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at. – Bruce Lee
8. A goal properly set is halfway reached. – Zig Ziglar
9. A goal is a dream with a deadline. – Napoleon Hill
10. Success is a consequence and must not be a goal. – Gustave Flaubert

1. You focus more on your old patterns than you do on the new actions you want to develop
2. You find good reasons to avoid the activities you recently made a commitment to
3. You trick yourself into believing there is a better time than now
4. You resist asking for, paying for, or making time for the support you need
5. You wish the results were better than they are
6. You compare your journey to someone else
7. You feel disappointed with yourself
8. You find it hard to celebrate your progress

It’s human nature to examine your priorities at this time of year. 

Lots of people set new goals, and if you’re one that doesn’t believe in committing to resolutions, that is a declaration in itself.  It is common for people who set goals, and even those who don’t, to fear failure that they won’t be able to follow through.

What’s the difference between those reach their goals and those that don’t?  Motivation.  Motivation is the enthusiasm and force that drives a person to push past their real or perceived limits to accomplish something challenging.

Motivation lives in your heart.  It is carried out in your thinking and actions but it is birthed in your heart by way of conviction.

If you find that your motivation is wavering, it’s time to settle down and find your conviction again.  Why are you doing this?  What will this give you?  How much do you want this again?  What costs are you willing to pay for this?

Reconnecting to your values and the importance of your goals will flood you with fresh energy and inspiration to continue changing your old patterns.   When you get a new surge of motivation, be sure you put support measures in place to help you change your thinking and your actions to line up with the passion of your heart.

Are you contemplating setting a New Year’s resolution of losing 15 pounds by Valentines Day, changing a bad habit, or becoming the best person you can be in 2012?

While these are worthwhile goals, I’ve seen it time and time again.  By March, the motivation begins to waiver, focus gets interrupted and once again, failure seems inevitable.

Why not try a fresh approach in 2012?  While having a healthier lifestyle, a more fulfilling career and investing to achieve deeper relationships are noble goals,

What would happen if your New Year’s resolution

benefited more than just you?

FOR INSTANCE:

Do you want to lose weight?  The most successful people in losing weight get really clear about their values, role models and identify their avenues of support. They have  something more to think about then themselves.

Exercise and making healthy meals include vulnerability with people around you.  Activities become focused on achieving something together with a friend.  Personal milestones become victory parties for everyone who contributed to your success.

You WILL drop weight, but you will celebrate more than just weight loss;  The intangibles of allowing a shared experience, honest conversations, and trusting others enough to help keep you motivated will deepen relationships, increase your trust in yourself, inspire others…and the circle of benefit continues to grow deeper and longer.

Here’s to a New Year!  Whatever your goals, may your resolutions take on new roots, and may you experience richer benefits extending beyond yourself!