Apparently Kurozuka doesn’t care about maintaining chronological continuity absolutely perfectly, but it doesn’t mean you can hate on it for doing so.

Episode 02 - 「因縁塚」 The Tomb of Karma

So at the end of the previous episode we had Kuro dying of his injuries suffered in his attempt to protect Kuromitsu from a sneak attack team of baddies that were tipped off by the traitorous manservant monk Benkei. Instead of seeing what Kuro’s response would be to Kuromitsu’s offer of immortality via vampirism, and yeah, as if we really needed to know what his answer was (duh), we get to see some poor Tosa samurai scmuck get his butt handed to him by a rather unsavory looking swordsman (who looks pretty familiar).

If you give him a monk's robe and...

Even though the guy fights with only his sword arm (too badass to use both), he apparently doesn’t have trouble taking care of business. Judging from the remarks made over whether the capital should be called Edo or Tokyo, Kurozuka’s fast forwarded some seven centuries to the 1860s: the Bakumatsu is in full swing and the Tokugawa shogunate is on its last legs.

Looking like he doesn't care? Blood on his face? Yep, total badass.

Yeah, that's right, he spat a blood loogie into that dude's eye.

After he gets done pilfering the corpses for some coin, the swordsman notices a couple walking towards him across a nearby bridge. Both of them are taken aback at the massacre before them and recoil once they see the killer before them, blood still fresh on his clothes. Being true to his psycho killer mentality, the swordsman chases the couple down the bridge from whence they came. In no time he manages to take the head of the young man and then proceeds to hack up the young woman as well. Yet before he can so much as kneel down to rob the bodies blind, the swordsman is driven away by the presence of several Shinsengumi, shogunate police forces.

Happy days.

Party's over.

Our charming killer buddy’s made it out to the woods and finds himself ducking into an apparently abandoned house in the woods (lol, pretty familiar). Suddenly he jumps to a woman’s voice that suddenly calls out to him from behind; it’s Kuromitsu.

Here we go again.

Seeing her as just a normal woman, the swordsman introduces himself as Izou Okada and then proceeds to crassly order Kuromitsu to serve him food. A historical note of importance here is that Izou Okada was a real swordsman famous for being one of the greatest assassins in this period of Japanese history. If you’ve seen other shows based around the events of the Bakumatsu you’ve probably seen other adaptations of this guy: Jin-E Udou in Rurouni Kenshin and Nizo Okada in Gintama.

Kuromitsu plays along and complies with Izou’s demands, but her nonchalant acceptance of the situation rouses the assassin’s suspicions. However since she seems to be nothing more than just a mere woman, Izou goes ahead and silently plans to just kill her and take the goods. And it’s at this point that Kuromitsu kindly asks him not to go around peeking in her bedchamber in a manner very much like how she showed to Kuro and Benkei all those centuries ago.

Just as keikaku.

Yet for some reason Izou can’t focus on what Kuromitsu’s saying; it appears as if he’s been slipped a nighty-night drug in his stew. He wakes up in the middle of the night on the floor with the cooking fire doused and in near total darkness. Amazingly Izou finds his sword and proceeds to scout out Kuromitsu’s house, and as luck would have it he finds himself just outside her bed chamber.

Anything's better than watching blood drain from a dude hanging upside-down, right?

This time Kuromitsu doesn’t have one of her boyfriends hanging from the cieling though. Instead she’s running a blade in front of a whetstone… IN FRONT OF A TALKING SEVERED HEAD.

DAMN IT.

So yeah, Kuro’s seen better days and Izou’s quite understandably freaked the hell out. To top it all off, he overhears the couple talk plan his demise in retribution for the attack on the bridge. Then, again with impeccable dramatic timing, Kuromitsu tosses Izou the stink eye through the slit in the doorway. Game over.

Kuromitsu's that RPG story boss you can't defeat because of plot armor.

The episode then shifts to another location with the masked Onmyouji from last episode suddenly speaking to Izou… who is hanging from the cieling in what appears to be some kind of ornate hallway. The masked man questions Izou about his true identity and surprisingly the assassin comes to the realization that he’s actually Benkei! But before we can get more details, he’s willed by the Onmyouji to another area of the strange dimension, perhaps the eponymous Tomb of Karma, to reveal that… he’s also Kuro? Wait, what?

lol, it's the Tomb of Karma.

It's the Tomb of Karma, lol.

The Onmyouji then confronts Kuro about the nature of his relationship with Kuromitsu. Kuro shows little of the reserved stoicism that characterized his appearance in the first episode and a huge amount of pure fanboyism for his new vampiric mistress. With that, the Onmyouji asks Kuro if he knows who he truly is; naturally he answers that he’s Kuro, but the masked man objects. Kuro/Benkei reverts back to the first area of the dimension and under the Benkei persona once more, though this time thoroughly confused and quite uncomfortable. The Onmyouji begins to give him/them his/their true name, but Kuro/Benkei decides that screaming out his frustrations is a better use of his time than shutting up and actually listening to the answer. The Benkei persona arrives to the area in which the Kuro persona was being questioned, but this time is greeted by the Onmyouji and two other associates as their leader…

Wait, aren't you supposed to be already dead/set to die in the past/future!?

We then return to the far past, back in the forest where Kuro sits up against a tree dying of his wounds. He’s accepted Kuromitsu’s proposal and has his blood sucked; he aptly describes the experience as pure euphoria.

That's hot.

Here, Kuromitsu recounts the time when she herself was vampirized by a rather lean blonde youth on a beach. Apparently in order to complete the process of turning into a vampire in Kurozuka requires the victim to partake in the blood of the vampire who sired him/her. Freaky, but whatever.

Blonde Kuro clone sires Kuromitsu who then sires his pseudo-reincarnation... right?

Anyway, after whispering sweet nothings to each other under the tree (man that dusty old thing’s been seeing a ton of action), Kuro’s head starts to drum out migraines like no other. It certainly would’ve helped if Kuromitsu put in a “BTW, if you suck blood, your head will hurt. Badly. For an hour straight.” because as Kuro’s writhing in pain, because a Kamakura hit squad’s on their way to wipe the both of them out. Sadly for Kuro he gets diced by an incoming overhead slice (man, I feel bad for this guy) and Kuromitsu’s stuck to the tree right through her gut. In their defense, the guy who did the dicing and stabbing seemed pretty inhuman himself.

"NOT AGAIN!"

"NOT AGAIN!"

Creepy Onmyouji man reveals their intentions to use her as their vehicle to immortality and proceeds to show her why he always wears a scary mask.

What's the point of wearing the mask then?

Not too happy at seeing his sweetheart having a sword moved around in her gut by a guy whose face looks like sloppy meatloaf, Kuro gets back up with his awesome power/steam aura and blank-yet-stone-cold killer eyes. Amazed at Kuro’s revival, the troop commander confirms my suspicions that Kuro’s actually Minamoto no Yoshitsune. Unfortunately for them, Kuro’s pretty freakin’ keen on his undying RAGE powers right from the get-go.

You wouldn't like him when he's angry...

Towering behemoth dude? Shoulder rammed to death. Another masked, ninja man? Throat crushed (lol, again). Goofy headband samurai-type? Torn in half at the waist. Nifty knife tossing fox mask guy? Head turned into a dartboard. Silly troop commander? Shat his pants; also sliced and diced.

...seriously, you REALLY wouldn't.

Having Kuromitsu’s blood running in your veins is a very good thing to have if you want to be a huge badass. And it’s on that thought that the creep-faced Onmyouji decides to jump in the bodily fluid hype, literally. However, the top of his head flies clear off its lower half thanks to a well-timed stroke from Benkei’s sword. Kuro’s understandably pleasantly surprised that his subordinate’s returned in a timely fashion and is told that the delay was caused by the monk having had to take an unscheduled detour to Hiraizumi on his errands (not sure how far away that is, since we don’t know where Kuromitsu’s been living at this time).

Just in the nick of time---

Anyway Benkei suggests to Kuro that the two of them get the hell out of the area. Kuromitsu agrees to help spirit them out of the forest when she notices a strange marking on Benkei’s hand. Her warning is too late as Benkei’s already figured his cover’s blown and promptly lops off off Kuro’s head. As the light fades from his upside-down vision, Kuro’s left to ponder why Benkei betrayed him… and if he’ll ever see Kuromitsu ever again… (lol we know that he does, but that’s beside the point).

---to get in the cheap shot that establishes him as a big villain.

Anyway, Kuro mysteriously awakens in the middle of the forest (head still attached) but with no sign of either Kuromitsu or Benkei. Somehow he’s picked up a new set of threads in the time he’s been passed out, but he pays it no mind as he attempts to get his bearings at the cliffside. However, he’s shocked to see that the vast expanse of woodland’s been replaced by the ocean flooded remains of a ruined modern age city…

The writing team must've had a nice big circle-jerk after storyboarding this one.

So this week’s episode was a giant bloodfest (surprise, surprise it’s a VAMPIRE show) and even managed to toss in some nice karmic bonds that’ll shape the relationship between Kuro, Kuromitsu, and Benkei across many more years to come. To me, Kuro’s still a giant ditz that really went on to confirm that he’s got nothing but a rocket in his pocket for Kuromitsu and nothing more (at the moment, anyway). I don’t really see why he’s going to spend the rest of his undying existence looking for the woman he’s lusting for just yet; that true love connection’s still gone unnoticed from my perspective. Kuromitsu is just as wily as ever, but it seems as if she can’t just quite make up her mind whether or not to be a frail damsel-in-distress that needs to be saved by immortality-hungry goons or a several-hundred year-old vampiress badass that can twist mere mortals into balloon animals. So far, it’s weak and tender 2, awesome blood-sucking witch 1.

Lastly there’s Benkei… he apparently doesn’t have the means to stay alive for as long as a vampire and looks to be reincarnating to keep run into Kuro and Kuromitsu. Still, if he’s going to be the main bad here, I wonder how the hell the Onmyouji and his lackeys managed to reach into the future to the mid-1800s and contact Izou/Benkei when they’ve been dead since the late 1100s… The Tomb of Karma, if that is the pocket dimension’s name, warrants further exploration since it’s really the clearest-cut case of magic at work here… but I wonder if we’ll ever see it again…

TO BE CONTINUED!

So now I’m back revisiting the series that helped give this site it’s name; it’s Nodame Cantabile: Paris Chapter!

They're back. God help us all.

Sadly, this French connection will not feature any awesome car chases.

Thankfully the show doesn’t waste time getting Nodame and Chiaki out of Japan; most viewers that pick up this show will have already been familiarized with how the two got the opportunity to land in their new European environs. And if you’re not one of these people? Well, really it’s not hard to pick up the pieces of backstory you’ve missed. A quick read at the wiki entry for the series should be more than enough to fill in any blanks if you really want to dive into this series without taking a look at either the manga,  first anime, or the live-action drama adaptation.

Leçon 1

So after some brief sight-seeing on the taxi cab ride over, Nodame and Chiaki get themselves settled into their apartments. Nodame, being a complete spaz, falls head over heels with her room (with the exception of the out-of-tune piano).

Nodame gets pumped over a lot of things. A LOT.

She also gets bummed by a lot of things. A LOT.

However her joy is unceremoniously cutoff when they take a look at Chiaki’s much more upscale abode; since he’s a relative of the landlord it’s expected he gets a better room. Nodame saunters over to Chiaki’s finely-tuned grand piano and plays her rendition of Ravel’s “Mirrors” which in turn gets the attention of the other tenants in the complex. Two of these tenants, Frank and Tanya, meet up in the stairwell to try and get a glimpse at the piano player(s).

They both spy Nodame jamming away on the keys when Frank comes to recognize Nodame. The two of them are friends, having both been baptized in the fires of a listening examination they both took a couple of months ago at the Conservatoire.

Clumsy Nodame and---

---chatty Nodame.

Amusingly, the two immediately start to speak each other in their native tongues (Japanese and French) but the conversation goes nowhere fast as they’re unable to comprehend one another.

Later, Sebastiano Vieira, Chiaki’s mentor and idol in conducting, is busy holding a show which Nodame and Chiaki happen to be attending together. As per usual, the performance is stirring and rouses much applause, but Chiaki refuses to make himself known to his old teacher. Even though Chiaki’s reputation is enough to get him backstage to Vieira’s dressing room, he decides to validate doing so by first entering the conductor’s concour to test his ability. The concour is a kind of contest between various capable junior conductors that gives a great boost to the winner’s prestige.

The master at work.

The couple then heads off to dinner at a French restaurant where Chiaki dazzles Nodame with his command of the language. But when he heads off to the restroom and leaves her to fend for herself with the waiter, Nodame inadvertantly orders some snails!

=| Nodame, you slay me.

Nodame immediately saves face and works through the snails; as Chiaki expected, Nodame had skirted her French studies and has been trying to get by with a mere phrase book. Chiaki chides Nodame for her barely understanding any French and gets fairly pompous in his condescending words. This earns him some spite from a tipsy Nodame who then throws a fit on the walk back to the apartments. She’s a bit homesick, and the stress of having to move overseas for the first time’s been getting to her, Chiaki soon realizes. He lets up and tucks her into bed for the night.

As annoying drunken Nodame can be...

...airplane-riding Chiaki is MUCH worse.

The next morning, Frank wrestles with his feelings of inviting Nodame over and hiding his otaku lifestyle from her when Tanya barges in just as he’s watching Purigorota (Remember? It’s Nodame’s favorite show too!).

Can't knock the figure collection there, Frank.

You can literally SEE the sexual tension in the air.

The two get on each other’s case for their lack of a love life like cats and dogs when Nodame enters the fray. She’s here to try and get Frank to help her learn some conversational French, but before she gets an answer Tanya’s quick to point out that Frank’s watching some kind of anime. However, Tanya doesn’t know that Nodame is religiously in love with Purigorota and pointing out that it’s on in the room prompts our favorite piano player to plop down in front of the TV set.

★Here comes trouble.★

★ GLORIOUS ANIME. ★

Tanya rushes up to Chiaki’s room to try her luck on the conducting student. Flaunting her feminine charms unabashedly, Tanya eventually learns that Chiaki and Nodame aren’t exactly an official item and goes on to put on a sob story about never having gotten to take a nice vacation to get Chiaki to sympathize with her. Chiaki, curious at her story of being a lonely Russian exchange student, decides to give her a chance to show him her piano playing.

Tanya's gotta work hard for that suge.

Meanwhile Frank comes to the realization that Nodame’s rapidly learning French by listening to the dub of Purigorota; her fantastic hearing ability’s apparently for more than just merely quickly picking up a piece of music!

WHY WON'T SHE LEAVE?

WHY ISN'T SHE BETTER?

So it looks like Tanya, with her poor piano skills, and Frank, with his inability to get Nodame to leave his TV, have gotten more than their fair fill of the two Japanese students for the day. Tanya realizes that Japan is such an economic powerhouse because they tons of people like Chiaki who don’t take vacations and Frank realizes that calling himself an otaku is a sham when there are real heavyweights like Nodame running around.

Heh, it's going to be an INTERESTING stay in Paris for everyone!

Jeez, this is my THIRD time going through this part of Nodame Cantabile, thanks to having been exposed to both the manga and drama renditions of the Paris arc. And well… the thing is the gags are still pretty funny even though by all indications the material should be getting stale. I don’t know, I’m not even that hardcore a fan of the story since I haven’t really picked up the manga past the point where the drama specials ended, but something about Ninomiya’s writing has this certain charm to it that just remains novel even after repeated exposure to it. Nodame’s a complete quackball of a character, but at the same time it’s this quality that makes her timeless; sorta like Osaka from Azumanga Daioh!. Okay, Nodame’s actually got some talent and Osaka’s can at least take care of her own hygiene, but you know what I mean.

TO BE CONTINUED!

Well at the very least you can say that Kurozuka is the one show this season that decided to spice things up in the prologue/OP segue with both Noh chanting and garbled metal growling.

Episode 01 - 「安達原」 The Plain of Adachi-ga-hara

Madhouse and Maximum the Hormone STRIKE BACK! (Actually majority of the props for the OP, “Systematic People,” should go to WAGDUG FUTURISTIC SOCIETY, but honestly all I heard was Maximum the Hormone)

Random Noh player also agrees with the superiority of Maximum the Hormone.

We now enter out story courtesy of yet another bleak post-apocalyptic cityscape…

Prime pencilboard material. Oh wait, the ladies won't buy it without more crotch bulge.

WAIT. WAT. WHERE’D ALL THESE TREES COME FROM? Unannounced time warp to the past was incredibly unannounced.

I was seriously thought the continuity checker gave up for a second or two there.

Seriously, whoever decided to sic generic zombie samurai baddies on a main hero-esque character has seriously got to step up their action cliche game. The ensuing one-sided skirmish is certainly pretty enough, but comes off a bit uninspired as our good guy monk character only really only comes under trouble when…

OH DEAR GOD.

WHAT IS IT? WHATEVER, IT'S ALREADY CREEPY.

WAIT. WAT. Random paralyzing flashbacks of creepy silhouettes can really ruin your day. Especially when you’re locked in mortal combat with an undead bag of rotting flesh and expensive looking red lacquered armor. Lucklily for our messy-haired celibate (hmm, actually given how he’s a badass hero, I highly doubt he hasn’t adhered to that part of a monk’s calling), his trusty manservant shows up to save the day.

Got kinda hard distinguishing between the two early on when they were all monk'd out.

Apparently our story’s protagonist, Kuro, not only has to deal with exploding cadaver soldiers from the hostile province of Kamakura, but also with a brother that seems to want him dead. The manservant continues to expand upon how many groups/folks want Kuro’s head on a pike (why? he seems like a nice enough killer monk) when Kuro gives us our first real inkling as to what the current time period is. It isn’t the post-apocalyptic future that we first saw Kuro monkeying around in; it’s actually not too long after the Taira clan’s been usurped by the Minamoto, which would make it around the 1180s or so.

Historians often forget the T-Virus outbreak that struck 12th c. Japan.

The manservant’s name is revealed to be Benkei, which given the time period, would suggest that he is the legendary warrior monk Saito Musashibou Benkei. This in turn, combined with the fact that people want Kuro dead (his brother, and troops from Kamakura), would make Kuro none other than Minamoto no Yoshitsune. This would make sense because that would make Kuro’s brother Minamoto no Yoritomo, the man who would go on to establish the Kamakura shogunate. /history speculation action

Eventually the two happen to spot a light in the mountain forest and decidde to check it out in the hope that if they’re people there, they’ll be friendly to let them stay the night. The light happens to be a small house, dimly lit by a few candles here and there.

Nice place.

Eventually a woman dressed in a bright orange-red kimono comes out to meet them. As Benkei introduces the two of them to the woman, Kuro meets her eyes in a long gaze which culminates in Kuro nearly passing out. The woman eventually agrees to let the monks stay on the condition that they do not peek into her private sleeping chamber no matter the circumstance. Her name is Kuromitsu and she obviously does not enjoy giving free shows.

Smokin' hot, surprisingly vulnerable vampiress-type.

Jeez, Kuro DOES WANT and he DOES WANT hard.

Unfortunately, not enough blood was left to run his BRAIN.

Anyway, the next morning Benkei has Kuromitsu look after Kuro while he buys some medicine at the bottom of the mountain. On his way down the trail Benkei spots a statue at a grave that has been ominously beheaded; cue the rolling thunder and creepy-as-hell “Tubular Bells”-esque tune and you know Kuromitsu’s going to be up to no good.

Wouldn't be as creepy without the BLOODSTAIN-like marks.

Next, Benkei runs into an enormous clearing filled with dozens upon dozens of spider lilies; known as higan-bana in Japan, they’re a well known omen of death.

PROTIP: The bulbs are poisonous.

Kuromitsu decides to put the moves on Kuro as he lays in bed and moves in to seal the deal with a kiss…

Yeah, I'm pretty sure he resisted the hell out of that.

Later in the day, Kuro wakes up to Kuromitsu asking him how he feels now. The two go out for a walk and Kuromitsu reveals taht she’s been oh so lonely in the mountain forest… Taking advantage of her loneliness Kuro’s hormones take over and he attempts to force himself upon her for a fleeting moment before the two snap out of their horny funk and settle down.

DOWN BOY! (lol, I love the look on their faces)

Awkward escapades aside, the hours pass and an impending attack on Kuromitsu’s house is revealed to the audience. Luckily for our hero, he now shows off some kind of extrasensory perception that effectively gives him some kind of mystical threat radar as he passes through Kuromitsu’s house.

Either that or Kuromitsu tongue-slipped him a tab of E.

He isn’t able to hone in on where the intruders are exactly, but something else is calling out to him. In a daze, he eventually finds himself in front of Kuromitsu’s bed chamber where he spies her—

CODDLING AND LICKING AN UPSIDE-DOWN, BLOOD-SOAKED MAN.

Poor wandering villager, we hardly knew ye.

Kuro bursts into her room and confronts Kuromitsu, yet… even though she’s been found out as a vampire she doesn’t launch herself at Kuro to silence him forever. In fact she’s actually shamed at having been found out, yet also slightly relieved that it was Kuro who discovered her secret. However, before the two can make reconciliary whoopie, a GIANT ASS masked stranger appears behind Kuromitsu and chops off her right arm!

Unnecessarily tall man humbly declares "raeptiem."

A second infiltrator sticks a huge knife in Kuro’s back as more raiders with flaming arrows light Kuromitsu’s house on fire. The strangers are from Kamakura, and apparently they’ve been after Kuromitsu since a huge group look on as a soldier tries to deliver her deathblow—

GA-REI -zero- and Kurozuka = autumnal gorefest '08

—yet fails catastrophically as Kuro dives in and relieves him of his forearms and weapon. Kuro manages to off a couple of the baddies with some impressive swordplay, but he’s eventually brought into submission by a stray arrow and the masked main baddie that knocked Kuromitsu out.

LOL

Apparently he knows Kuro from somewhere, but before he can elaborate Kuromitsu returns the favor by blindsiding him with a helluva choke grip. Poor sap couldn’t say anything else besides a bloody gurgle as she crushed his throat like a cardboard tube.

LOL

Meanwhile, an Onmyouji and troop commander reveal that Kuromitsu’s been hunted since the Heian period (that’s been for about 200 years by this time). They’ve been looking for her in order to understand the secrets of immortality—

—and they wouldn’t have been able to find her if it hadn’t been for Benkei’s tipoff.

"buying medicine" = BRINGING THE NOISE

Meanwhile, Kuro and Kuromitsu retreat into the forest back to the ancient tree where their feelings for one another surfaced. Kuro’s wounds are too grave and he doesn’t have much time to live…

I swear, couldn't she have sired him in a less cliched way?

And it’s then that Kuromitsu bids him to join her on a journey. To eternity.

God, that came off so GOTH.

So yeah, that was Kurozuka’s premiere; not really all that special in terms of what it had to offer as a vampire story. Kuromitsu’s lair gets outed by an errant discovery and Benkei decides to call in the fireworks to purge the land of evil. There were only two things that really stood out for me here: First is that Benkei decided to ally himself with the boys from Kamakura even though he seemed to have been honestly devoted to Kuro and if they really are Saito Musashibou Benkei and Minamoto no Yoshitsune respectively, this doesn’t really make any historical sense.

Then again, this show does have zombie soldiers and vampires.

Secondly, I was honestly expecting Kuromitsu to be more in tune with her immortal nature; I guess being alive for so long can really depress you especially if you see everyone you hold emotions for wither away over time.  So, she’s either very new at being a vampire (well at least 200 years old anyway) and hasn’t had time to become callous to the world, or she’s been alive so long that’s she’s gotten a bit desperate at “living.” Either way, her soft spot for Kuro doesn’t deflect me from her personally and is a rather attractive character trait (her coming to grips with what’s left of her humanity is in ways similar to Seras Victoria’s from Hellsing).

As for the main character? Kuro’s pretty bland himself right now, but hell we’ll be seeing more and more of him (obviously) as the series goes on. I’ll really only be able to pass judgment on him after I’m able to see how deep his love for Kuromitsu goes across the centuries he spends chasing her. As of right now, it’s just a physical infatuation that doesn’t really impress me all that much, but this could very well become quite epic quickly.

So after getting the whole cast wasted in the first episode, where exactly does GA-REI -zero- head off to now?

Episode 02 - 「憎発露-にくしみのはつろ-」 "Manifestation of Hatred"

"Sarge! Will we ever be important in this show again?"

"No, not unless we learn to shoot magic out of our asses Private."

Well we’re given the impression right off the bat that Tohru’s crew wasn’t exactly the last line of defense for the nation against supernatural threats. Instead, more reinforcements show up this time around wielding even crazier gadgets and powers. Instead of the familiar orange-clad Ministry of Defense regulars, the government’s very own Ministry of the Environment’s sent in their own disposal team to finish mopping up the mess.

"Oh, c'mon Sarge! That guy's using briefcase mallets!"

Of particular note are Nori, another motorcycle rider keen on using weasel-like familiars that zap hostile spirits and—

Some kind of raijuu, perhaps? Either way, doesn't exactly spell out badass.

—Kagura, a slick blade-wielding schoolgirl (as if there are any other kinds of schoolgirls in action shows), who deftly hands the big bad Category B spirit its doom courtesy of her quick-draw skills.

Ready...

...steady...

...GO!

Thereafter the very same government committee that we saw convene with Kiriya in the first episode quickly recounts the events of the incident, including the complete annihilation of the Ministry of Defense’s elite squad. Apparently the council felt strongly about the Ministry of Defense’s project and are now taken aback at the prospects of having the Ministry of the Environment take over in supernatural disaster situations. Two members of the succeeding authority, Ayame Jinguji and her secretary Kiri Nikaido introduce themselves to the committee and take advantage of the situation by asserting themselves before the old men. Being the bureaucrats that they are, the old men adhere to the compartmentalized nature of the government by refusing to turn over intelligence on the recently concluded operation.

All Ministry of Defense reports point to "we're screwed." =|

As a show of good faith, the Environmental agents decide to show off what they know and the news isn’t very pleasant. According to them, there are MULTIPLE category A’s operating all around the nation and given the Ministry of Defense’s hard-fought battle against the mere Category B just a few hours ago… The tables are turned, and the two ministries uneasily join forces.

All Ministry of the Environment reports point to "you're screwed." =)

Anyway back at the scene of the Category B’s defeat, Kagura shares a tender moment with Nori just as the bodies of the dead soldiers inside the ambulances decide to come back to life and munch on the medical crew. These zombies, or Mouryou, seem to be mere cannon fodder though as they’re relgated to Category D status before the two sides lock into combat.

"Cleanup sucks, we don't get paid enough to scrape up (un)dead folks..."

"SERIOUSLY, I QUIT!"

Sure enough, the Environmental agents go to town mopping the streets of the Mouryou… yet they’re unaware of a GIANT pillar of light that descends elsewhere on the town that happens to awaken a midboss-type baddie…

Drill arms? BAD NEWS for whoever gets in his way.

Meanwhile, Ayame and Kiri take a look back at the footage that was rolling as Tohru’s team was massacred (in the last episode) and make a token breathtaking/startling discovery. And just on cue, the mysterious Category A spirit that wiped them out has returned to continue the job against random Environmental agents. Again the results are just as decisive and… gory.

The Category A spirit appears before Kagura and the rest of the agents and is immediately identified as Yomi Isayama. Apparently Yomi and Kagura have some history as they appear to recognize one another (and who seriously didn’t see that happening? sailor fuku and swords has to be an exclusive club). According to Ayame, Yomi’s apparently a former Environmental agent herself that went missing/rogue some time ago.

Yoooooo~~~!

The order comes down from Kiri to eliminate Yomi, just as the latter summoons a Ranguren, an imposing mouthbeam-shooting beastie. Yomi makes a hasty withdrawal just as Mouryou stampede in. Nori and Kagura head off after Yomi as the rest of the team stays back to hold off the zombie advance.

Seriously, what is it with villains and mouth beams?.

Nori and Kagura eventually split off in the public underground system to cover more ground, with Kagura taking one of Nori’s familiars so that they can stay in contact. But it’s not long before Kagura’s little companion loses its head when the two run into Yomi herself. Apparently Yomi was Nori’s fiancee in the past, which would’ve made for an interesting wedding to say the least. Like the other main baddie seen in the previous episode, the messy-haired boy on the bridge, Yomi arrives in a cascade of blue butterflies before leaping in to cleave Kagura apart.

Eh, at least it's better than generic power aura #512.

The two appear to be close in skill, though  Kagura refuses to draw against her old friend. But in one deft move, Kagura eventually draws her own blade and captures Yomi’s sword in the empty sheath.

As per the usual go-around, Yomi gives Kagura the talk that all villains give heroes about their naivety and weakness which draws them in to a moment of vulnerability. The battle is rejoined with Yomi assuring Kagura that Nori won’t interfere given his history of cowardice.

PROCEED.

The have a twenty-second standoff (yes, I counted) before the two leap at each other; Yomi misses, and Kagura decides to gash open a nearby gas pipe before escaping the tunnel. Nearby sparks from a freshly severed power line ignites the gas, engulfing Yomi in a fiery blast.

They must've used up too much of the frame count in the first half of the episode.

Kagura barely manages to arrive back at the surface before collapsing when Yomi walks up to her prostrate body. The Ranguren then shows up and roughs Kagura up pretty badly… Kagura’s on the ropes and tries to plead with Yomi, her sister…

Yomi flies into a rage at being addressed as such and lets her sword fly just as the staff roll ends in the episode.

I'm actually rooting for the baddies to win in this series.

Okay, so GA-REI -zero- decided to opt for a new main cast to crash the show instead of reviving Tohru and the gang or pulling a flashback arc… but I still haven’t really found anyone worth investing any emotion with besides Yomi, who ironically appears to be void of any emotion until the very last scene. Ugh, Nori’s really hadn’t had any exposition built into his character just yet even though it looks like he’ll be succeeding Tohru as the lead hero and Kagura’s well… an insecure schoolgirl prone to fits of short-lived badassery and long-winded attachment issues. Neither of them have my vote of confidence just yet, in fact, of all the “good guys” on the Ministry of the Environment’s crack field team I’d have to say I’m the biggest fan of the unnamed cocky team member that goes around bashing people’s skulls in with briefcase mallets/guns. That’s right. My favorite character (aside from Yomi) in this show is a guy who goes around serving people with luggage and comes off a bit douchey in the process. The Batou-ripoff with the mohawk and the drillarms? A distant second (only because of the DRILLARMS). How about the twins with the generic big guns? Off the radar.

Ministry of Defense mobile team = 1

Ministry of the Environment agency = 0

Oh wait, THEY KILLED THEM OFF ALREADY.

Ministry of Defense mobile team = 0

Ministry of the Environment agency = 0

Category A spirit bad guy force of evil disaster making = 1

Either way, this show is off the Captions! treatment and on a regular blogging format because of the potential RAGE I’m forecasting in this series.

Okay, but how many of them have ANTLERS?

Note: Need a refresher?

Source: Byonavi

I have full confidence in cosplay AV studios banking in on the new OVA.

Source: Neta

You know those shows that look bad from the previews, but are actually really good?

Yeah, this isn’t one of them. In fact, this is a clear-cut case of actually not awesome.

Episode 01 - 「サクラサク」 "Cherry Blossom Blooming"

The series opens up with a general backstory blurb on how the world and it’s particulars (in this case, the existence of Youkai) have come to pass. Ancient trees, known as Nanagou, acted as the sole conduit between the human and Youkai worlds. Since humans resented the presence of Youkai, apparently a spat erupted between the two that resulted in the latter founding their own safe haven in the human world. This town, Sakurashin, is a new kind of settlement in which both kinds of beings can live together.

BEFORE

AFTER

Now this is all cool beans until the inevitable troublemakers show up and decide to muck everything up. Wayward Youkai who’ve decided to lash out at the humans are subjected to “Tuning,” an ability that puts them in their place which can only be used by the successor of the human Hiizumi clan.

This screenshot is a lie.

And with that, we’re introduced to the eponymous quartet, who all work for the town’s amazingly small Youkai affairs office:

Hime – Typical stuffy rich girl with a ninja/vigilante complex. Given her superhuman reflexes (lol dragon blood), she most definitely aced physical education at her school.

Scarves = overused visual highlighter for "LOOK AT MAH FLUID MOVES."

Powers: All-around general badass, makes everyone around her look kinda cool.

Ao – Loli-shota (eventually confirmed to be female) with cat ears hidden under a skullcap. One of those characters that looks young, but acts more mature than others. Described as a kind of mind reader.

Is she making you uncomfortable already? Don't worry, she will. Eventually.

Powers: Overfires her brain's neurons to achieve questionable (lol) precognitive state.

Kotoha – Office secretary type whose glasses and fascination with gunpla evokes a fujoshi sensibility of sorts. Also her voice is annoyingly lackadaisical (the seiyuu’s responsible for Di Gi Charat’s Puchiko), but her chara design is relevant to my interests (long skirt + boots + twin ponytail = moar). Also, a mage of some kind.

A woman that puts care into plamos? Quite relevant to my interests.

Powers: Utters freaky magic words to crackle her tongue and...

...summon clouds of WTF H4X! Seriously not fair, but still awesome.

Akina – The everyman Hiizumi successor. Seems to have a problem with bed hair and flat affect; the latter of which could be a result of penis envy toward the others given how they have practically useful superpowers. Apparently when he uses the “Tuning,” his hair grows out.

See? Even he questions what the hell he's doing in this show.

Powers: Broken ONE HIT KO beam that grows his hair out. Yes, that last part is TRUE.

Anyway, as for the actual episode itself… the team’s been sent out onto the trail of a Youkai that’s been going around mugging the hell out humans all around Sakurashin (it’s not like baddies can do much of else anyway). When they eventually do find and confront him (and his horribly unstealthy attire; protip = if you sneak around at night, you shouldn’t wear a HUGE WHITE COAT), they’re treated to a surprise as the town’s newest loli-Youkai rushes to his aid.

Thank goodness the production staff put him out of his own misery early.

On the other hand, we'll be seeing more of this poor schtick in future episodes...

We’re treated to a short sob story about how humans can be the villains sometimes before Akina finally bizzaps our friendly neighborhood mugger with a dose of the “Tuning.”

As I said, BZZZZAAPPPPPPED.

Oh, and before the staff roll shows up an ominous pipe organ fires up with a ridiculous villain (same Youkai type as Ao?) mumbling generic “these weaklings are interesting” statements amidst the backdrop of a hugeass full moon. Obviously he’s some kind of endboss-type, so I have no doubt we’ll be seeing him again soon. By then, I can only hope he loses the ridiculous fur coat; it doesn’t make him fabulous so much as ridiculous.

Ugh. Go back to Gintama, please.

The bottom line for the first episode of Yozakura Quartet? Yeck. I’m pretty jaded on the superpower team-up shows that offer nothing special or novel to the table. To me, the genre reached an apex with R.O.D the TV back in 2003 and has yet to return to those  lofty heights (most probably because shows like this NEED great music to elevate them to greatness, and so far Akio Dobashi is nowhere near Taku Iwasaki). However, I do have have to concede that even though the villains could be brought in on crimes to fashion, the clean and plain aesthetic that the heroes show up in is refreshing… for this first episode anyway. Given that animation studios like to give characters one set costume design (for ease of drawing), I’m kinda bummed that it’s very likely we won’t be seeing the good guys in new threads.

Toss on another merit point on the rating scale for the OP and ED, probably my favorites so far this season. And… toss on another for the fact that studio Nomad is only making this insofar generic muck only 12 episodes. I’ll get around to watching the second episode eventually to see if this is worth continuing, but so far it’s got a yellow light.

What’s this? Yet another series covered for the new season?

Our new writer Marc would probably say it’s safe to note that this show has 100% more tree deities than you’ve ever seen before in an anime.

Scratch that.

Make it tree deities with idol spunk.

The OP for Kannagi is probably one of the most amusing to watch in a long while for a lot of reasons. The song is catchy and cute, the dance Nagi uses is adorable, and there are no static scenes used so it simply feels a lot more energetic. For every scene they use in the opening, every character is doing something aside from waiting for their moment in the camera.

Playing behind the local temple one day, a young Mikuriya Jin happens to capture a large spider. Caught from behind by a shrine maiden, Jin is distracted only for a few moments before a gust of wind blows and seems to take both the girl and the spider from the boy.

Ever have a beautiful girl come to life from a carving? Aside from your dreams I mean. Well that’s how the series starts out for Jin as he’s about to bring in his carving of a shrine maiden to be graded for school. Nagi’s actions and demeanor are hilarious in the aftermath as both try to make sense of the situation as to ‘why’ Nagi has manifested.

After going to the shrine to find out the Guardian Spirit Tree, aka: Nagi, had been cut down to clear some space to expand the temple, the pair discover that the impurities that the Tree had been purifying are coming to life. Nagi gets accosted by the little bugger which would normally taint any human that touches it, only to have Jin pull it off her and toss it with no ill effects, greatly annoying her in the process.

Once they go home and watch some TV, Nagi gets her ideas for a purification wand to help her exorcise the impurities before they start building up. Watching Nagi use her own Magic Girl choreography to try and purify the spiders was one of many funny parts of the episode. Finding the means to purify them with Jin’s help, the pair head home for something to eat.

Luckily for both of them Jin lives alone At home Jin begins to see all the difficulties in sharing a house with a girl, never mind that she also happens to be a goddess. After dinner and everything else is taken care of; including going to the store to buy Nagi a new set of clothing, panicking when she answers his phone, and giving her a taste of technology, the pair say their good nights and get ready for bed. In the middle of the night Jin is woken up by the sounds of Nagi making her way through the house, eventually showing that even goddesses use the bathroom.

Thoughts:

Wow. Considering I’d never even heard of this series before I watched the first episode, I was completely blown away by everything the show threw at me. Nagi’s childish behavior being the large driver of the humor as she reacts to what’s happening around her in varying ways. I gotta say I’m glad I checked this show out as if the first episode is an indication of what to expect, then it’s a given already that the show won’t disappoint in the laughs department.

As to who I am, I’m a friend of Gerald’s who’s taking a stab at the anime blogosphere. Nice to meet ya.

So apparently the escalator disaster that happened at this past summer’s Wonder Festival was worrisome enough for the event’s executive committee to warrant a cancellation of the next one. Wonfes 2009, which was planned for next February, was apparently sunk by ramifications stemming from an ongoing police investigation as to who should be held responsible for a freak escalator accident that had otaku going one direction four floors-high one moment, then the other the next.

According to insiders like Danny Choo, apparently NONE of the authority figures behind the event at the Tokyo Big Sight will step forward and take responsibility. Therefore, the investigation has to had to pull teeth in getting some justice for the 10 people that were injured by the faulty escalator.

Sigh, it’s terrible that we won’t be able to enjoy what the figure industry has to offer on hand as well as on the horizon come this winter… But I suppose other events such as Hobby Expo (and possibly Comiket) will become even more important as publicity venues for these companies…

Here’s to whenever Summer Wonfes 2009 goes official!

Source: Anime News Network

Just today, Comic Book Legal Defense Fund (lol, I never even knew such an organization existed) announced that they’d be taking up the case of one Chris Handley, a fanboy from Iowa who managed to land himself in a whole bunch of trouble importing naughty manga from the land of the rising sun. The stakes? Handley’s massive otaku library of over 1,200 manga volumes, several hundred DVDs, tapes, and LDs (now you HAVE to know he’s hardcore), as well as multiple computers and hard drives worth of other material. Oh, and a prison sentence of up to TWENTY years in a federal pound-me-in-the ass prison (that or some white-collar resort, lol)

Defending your right to step your 2D fap game up since 1986.

So apparently the whole thing started when the US federal government’s postal inspection service happened to open one of Handley’s self-care packages and found that there were seven manga which contained “objectionable images.” Given the sheer volume of freaky cartoon porn in just this one box, the feds then obtained a search warrant from a local judge and proceeded to raid Handley’s otaku lair which was found to be quite… lol, yeah. Anyway, Anime News Network points out that Handley was charged under a certain provision of the PROTECT Act that read:

“a visual depiction of any kind, including a drawing, cartoon, sculpture, or painting,” that —

• ‘(1)(A) depicts a minor engaging in sexually explicit conduct; and• ’(B) is obscene; or

• ‘(2)(A) depicts an image that is, or appears to be, of a minor engaging in graphic bestiality, sadistic or masochistic abuse, or sexual intercourse, including genital-genital, oral-genital, anal-genital, or oral-anal, whether between persons of the same or opposite sex; and

• ‘(B) lacks serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value;

ought to be grounds for one’s arrest should they be discovered in one’s possession (or something to that effect). So clearly, either Handley was into watching lolis get their freak on OR he simply had the worst literary, artistic, political, or scientific taste EVER in his manga.

Good luck to the CBLDF and to Handley; as long as this sad man doesn’t extended his tentacles to real children (which is why I’m curious as to what’s on his computers’ hard drives; if there is real child porn this is a totally different story) I say, let him blow enormous amounts of cash on his fantasy.

Source: Anime News Network

wwwwwwwww

Source: Neta

My preorder is now confirmed.

I already liked what I saw from when I tried out the arcade version at San Jose State University’s student union, but I had a few extremely minor qualms about the game (does the game really need focus attacks? I really miss parrying).

However, that’s all just after the fact—Sakura just got confirmed as a console character at Capcom’s booth for this year’s Tokyo Game Show!

I imagine she probably hasn’t changed all that much from when I last played her in Street Fighter Alpha 3, but that’s just fine by me so long as they’ve decided to keep her awesome victory poses (need me some of that groove shuffle).

Source: Siliconera

So... what's the contingency for a terror-summoning doomshota? Any ideas, Tōru?

Ah crap, he's having one of those freaky flashbacks again.

Hot.

So it looks like the plan is to put the new monster in a magic bubble...

...then have it chase Natsuki across town...

...to an underground anti-flood system that Mami's highlighted in crayon...

...so that Tōru can AWP the thing...

...after this unassuming glowstick...

...turns the floodwaters into a giant holy soup of some kind. Hope Tōru doesn't...

SONOFA!

lol, whoops.

Still, Natsuki's a-okay after Tōru's little mishap and the big bad spirit took a dirt nap.

Obviously this victory calls for some awesome victory coffee.

Moe.

BUT WAIT.

OH SHI---

lol

lol

lol

lol

lol

lol

So from killing all his friends to participating in some freaky dream time?

Apparently doomshota got in on possessing Tōru's main squeeze.

DO IT ALREADY.

Ah crap, he really did it.

Parallelism at its finest. Good night sweet princess.

Friend? Foe? Doesn't matter, she killed the entire cast for some reason.

Sorta-kinda-pretty-really-totally dead.

WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED IN THIS EPISODE!?

Hopefully we get some pretty good answers in the next episode; if we do, I just might decide to pull GA-REI -zero- off the Captions! treatment. There’s obviously a lot for the writers to cover, but I sure as hell hope they don’t make this series off to be the type to open up with the final episode (that almost never works and ends up making shows pretty hammy at the “end”).

TO BE CONTINUED?

Yeah... so what was this show about again?

Yeah… There wasn’t a ton of setup here to go through and in many ways GA-REI -zero- started off with what seemed to be a transitory episode (structurally speaking). Again, like Toradora! this wasn’t a show I was wanting to cover from the beginning of the Fall season, but a few people I knew seemed interested in it. I’ll probably do the next episode or two in this Captions! format, and if I like what I see I’ll go ahead and change back to a more standard-looking post per week.

Tōru Kanze, the token stoic main character hero-type.

Japanese folklore 101: Colorful butterflies invokes a sense of a loved one's passing.

Natsuki Kasuga, the token very capable yet vulnerable heroine-type.

Incoming supernatural defense aerial battle fortress.

Are those...

...yeah, they're scouters.

I'M FREAKIN' OUT MAN!

I really should've taken the night off sick.

lol

lol

lol

lol

Face it, the main character's guns are ALWAYS more powerful.

Hate to be the poor sap that had to spent hours inscribing these damn things.

On the tires?! Why don't they just inscribe these things on uniforms then?

This show also has characters that practice bike-fu...

...and aerial tankers that drop payloads of holy water.

Complementary character types (Kudō Kusuno, Masaki Shindō) are complementary.

This season, only GA-REI can...

...pull something as...

...ridiculous as that.

Even the government experts agree.

Hell, even Gendo (Kiriya Konparu) here agrees.

He even has a bubbly Rei/loli-esque helper (Mami Izumi) at his side!

Kinda surprised a top-secret agency doesn't have specialized clean-up grunts.

Oh shi--- incoming ominous imagery.

And an ominous shota to boot!

TO BE CONTINUED!

The most expensive bidet ever.

What the hell is going on here? Not too sure if this happened in Japan per se, as the architecture hints at a European styling.

However, hit the jump to see some (not so work safe) clips of another crazed naked foreigner in Japan and read more at Japan Probe and Sankaku Complex.

Contrary to what he may have claimed, they did take him alive. Eventually.

Source: Neta