It’s been awhile. A long, loooong while. Much longer than I’d originally intended to be “away”.

I miss blogging, and I miss blogging here. But I’m still not happy with what “here” is. I thought I’d figure that out while I was taking some time away, but honestly, I haven’t given it a whole lot of thought. All I know is that I want to start blogging again. Sometime soon. Not right this instant, but soon. I’m really going to sit back and figure this whole thing out.

I’d like to apologise to you all, my lovely readers, for dragging you through my spaztastic identity crisis. I’m sorry, and if you’re still with me after this hoopla, I hope you’ll forgive me one last time for saying “I’ll be back soon”.

x K

I originally wrote this post last Thursday, but was too nervous to post it. Urged on by Brandi and Liz, here it is…

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Guys, can I be honest for a minute? I’m spent. Creatively, emotionally, I’m run dry. I feel like I’ve been phoning it in around here for the last month or so. I’m not sure what happened, but between the stresses and panic of so many life changes and an absorbent amount of work on my shoulders over the last few months, I’ve been struggling. Not just with the blog, but with everything I have on my plate. And I think I reached my breaking point earlier tonight.

I’m a perfectionist. Always have been, always will. That familiar saying, “don’t sweat the small stuff”? I can’t do that. It’s against every bone in my body, every fiber of my being. I’m simply not wired that way. I obsess about the details to the point that it drives me crazy. I will lay in bed for hours wide awake drilling myself on how to fix/improve/perfect the tiniest and seemingly insignificant thing. I like to tell myself this is why I will be a good designer – I am meticulous, observant, and extremely detail oriented. Other times, I think it will be my demise. I always want to be/do/create/etc. my very best, and I settle for nothing less. I have a hard time letting things go when I know I can do better.

I suppose my point is this: I’m not happy with this blog right now. I haven’t been for a long time. I want to be. But for right now, it gives me obsessive panicky thoughts. I have changed a lot over the last few years of blogging, and with all of these changes, I’ve never quite re-figured out what I want for SLG. I used to know, but I’ve drifted so far from where I started, that I have no idea now.

This is not goodbye. Not even close. And you know what, who knows, I might be back to posting regularly again tomorrow. All I’m saying is don’t worry about me. I’m still plugging away, I’m happy, I’m healthy. I’m just taking a breather. I have other important things on my plate right now that need my full perfectionist attention. ;) I need to temporarily let go of something.

Sometimes all you need to recharge is an evening to yourself, a weekend away, a huge bowl of the good ice cream. Too long I’ve been going on that assumption, and that assumption is wrong. This drain I’m feeling, it runs deeper than that. And I think in order for me to be happy with and unashamed of what I’m putting out into the world again, I need distance. Too often I feel like I’m not doing enough, and I need to do more. To do more – and to do quality more – right now, I need to do less. That probably sounds very backwards. But right now, to me, it makes perfect sense. I need to refuel hardcore. I’m like those re-chargeable batteries; in theory, you can plug them into the wall and charge them over and over again, but that’s never quite the case. The little green “fully charged” light might turn on at the end of each cycle, but each time, their life grows shorter and shorter and shorter and each time, they perform just a little bit less than their original potential. They always, eventually, wear thin. That’s where I am right now.

It’s not that I see the blog as a burden, because it’s not. I love blogging and I love SLG. But in my current frame of mind, that one that’s slowly crumbling under pressure, stress, learning to be a “grown-up”… in that frame of mind, blogging has temporarily been feeling like something I have to do, something I need to do, must do. I haven’t published an entry is near two weeks, and you know what? It makes me panic. I don’t know why. It just does. The end of last week came, I hadn’t posted since Monday, and I honestly panicked. It’s ridiculous, I know. But I think that panic ran deeper than just the act of not blogging for more than 4 days. It’s the principle of it. It was like, to me, not sticking to my (already incredibly loose) schedule, I had somehow failed. I had let people down, I had let me down. It’s funny, I posted this quotation over on k. at the beginning of the month: “An essential aspect of creativity is not being afraid to fail.” It’s been something on my mind quite often recently. I am afraid of failure. I’m constantly afraid of it. I’ve been afraid of it my whole life. And it’s exhausting. I need to find myself again, and I need to rebuild. I need to get to a place where I can, not necessarily, not sweat the small stuff, but to a place where I can panic and stress out and obsess in my own totally neurotic but totally natural to me way, but be able to step back and then let it go.

This all really means very little to you guys. In all likelihood, I probably didn’t need to say all of this. But I also really, really did. Letting this out already feels like a small weight has been lifted. If I’m blogging again tomorrow, that’s cool, I jumped the gun and posted this is a moment of weakness. But if I’m not, and a few weeks go by, I hope you all will understand and know that this is something I needed to do to regain a small piece of my sanity.

Until then, I’ll be around twitter & instagram, as always. Don’t be strangers, guys. :)

Happy Monday and stay inspired. xo.

Image sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20

Really, really digging every last little bit of Humanoid’s autumn/winter lookbook. It’s gorgeous. The patterns, the textures, the page layout, the styling, and of course the clothes… me = lusting. Consider this another one of my “can I please live in this?” moments, because truer words have ne’er been spoken. Simplicity, texture, subtlety, muted colours… A+, Humanoid. A+.

Images via Humanoid

This is one of my favourite mixes. It’s short, but it’s made up of some of my all-time favourite soft/chill-out sort of tunes. I’ll often go through phases of obsessive mixtape listening, then eventually tire of them. I’ve had this one in my iTunes for near 2 years now*, and it’s one I constantly re-visit and listen to over and over again. I love it just as much now as I did the day I created it. I hope you’ll all enjoy it as much as I do. :)

01. Trespassers William – Weakening
02. Lotte Kestner – Leif Erikson
03. Mariee Sioux – Buried In Teeth
04. Fever Ray – When I Grow Up
05. Bang Gang - Inside
06. Fauxliage – Let It Go
07. Sia - I’m In Here
08. Trespassers William – Different Stars
09. Julia Stone – With The Light

*For funsies and to switch things up a little bit, I added in one new favourite song – the final Julia Stone track – as she’s a recent musical find that I’m loooving to death and whose music perfectly fits this existing mix.

Listen to the mix on 8tracks ♪

Image via Juh Ore Duh Anne

Two things you should know about me: 1. I am obsessed with interior design, and 2. Give me a TV-on-DVD box set and plunk me down on a comfy sofa and I’m content for hours. Basically, I love interior and TV probably more than is healthy. Combine the two and holy bananas, I’m one haaaappy camper.

(Random aside: I, at one point, did consider going into set/stage design. But my program stopped offering the courses, so that didn’t happen.)

ANYWAY. TV + interior design in one place makes me happy. So naturally, these hand rendered floor plans of the apartments of popular TV characters makes me positively giddy. The artist, Iñaki Aliste Lizarralde, has put so much detail into each one. I’m just in awe of his attention to the smallest of details and his skill for drafting and rendering such beautiful floor plans. Wowzers. And the given: still lusting after miss Carrie Bradshaw’s apartment after all these years. Someone promptly built me her studio so I can live in it! (Hey, a girl’s gotta dream, right?)

Images via Iñaki Aliste Lizarralde, found via A Diary of Lovely

I’ve mentioned in the past that I have a strange fascination with photographs of water and pools, despite a mildly irrational fear of them in actuality. I don’t know what it is about them, but I’m drawn to them like a moth to a flame. I wonder if it’s that same type of feeling that possesses those storm/tornado chasers? In any case, this is a simple demonstration of “beautiful but terrifying” for me. But mostly beautiful because how can you not fall for the crystal clear waters captured in Massimo Vitali’s photos? The colours are so pure, so saturated, so delightfully summery! (And we in the northern hemisphere are clinging to the last couple weeks of summer.) I think what makes these photos to a whole new realm of amazing for me is that they’re filled with people. People everywhere. People are taking over each scene! I kind of love that. Static beach scenes are so cliched. These have so much life! I dig the realism and that he didn’t cater to the need to make the scenes so seemingly “perfect” by avoiding reality.

Images by Massimo Vitali via Yatzer

I stumbled upon this incredible book store+cafe. I don’t know much about it, but I know I love it. I cannot read the language of the blog I found it on, which is terribly depressing as I so desperately wish I knew more! I need to know more. From the images alone though, I feel pretty confident in saying this is my kinda space. It appears to be a converted church/cathedral and so is blessed with absolutely stunning inherent architectural features. Beautiful vaulted ceilings and archways, intricate paned glass windows, and the elegance and grandeur that such an historic building commands. Throw in a hint of modern architecture, a sea of books and a quaint little cafe, and I’m sold. Wherever you are in the world, amaaaazing cathedral-turned-book store+cafe, would you please reveal yourself to me, and oh, maybe let me camp out among the book stacks for a few hours/days?

Update: Thanks to Jessica for pointing out the store, Selexyz Dominicanen, located in Maastricht, Netherlands. It’s official: they have the best stuff in the Netherlands.

Images via Журнал Натали Шаталовой

A little lazy holiday weekend inspiration… Loving this photography/illustration collab from 3petitspoints Magazine. As always, mixed media is one of my favourites, and I especially love the combination of illustration and photography, so these are right up my alley.

Images via 3petitspoints Magazine

Chalk this up as another “wish I was a residential architect and/or landscape architect”. Someday, guys. Someday. Until then, totally smitten with the architecture and landscaping for this property. It’s pretty incredible. I love the integration of interior and exterior spaces (remind me why I don’t live in Chile so I can live the life?). Truly inspired. Of course, what initially drew me to this home, the extensive use of white, the materials, and the architectural simplicity of its strong, geometric lines. Plus that pool! Want.

Images from 57STUDIO via The Contemporist