Short Funny Jokes : collection of very funny jokes,pictures and funny videosnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Thu, 1 May 2025 13:24:28 +0700Blogger http://www.blogger.com395125http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/en-usnoShort Funny Jokes : collection of very funny jokes,pictures and funny videosnoreply@blogger.comhttp://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2021/10/lobster-story.htmlanimalsholiday jokesnice jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Thu, 28 Oct 2021 21:28:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-1865906661036447315In a small fishing village, a Newfoundlander was walking Up the wharf carrying two at-least-three-pound live lobsters, one in each hand.It was three weeks after the season closed! Whom should he meet at the end of the wharf but the Federal Fisheries Officer who, upon viewing the live and wiggling lobsters, says: "Well me Laddie I got you this time - with two live lobsters three weeks after the 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2021/10/are-computers-male-or-female.htmlComputerEducationShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Thu, 28 Oct 2021 21:19:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-4584214921641146452A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine.Things like 'chalk' or 'pencil,' she described, would have a gender association although in English these words were neutral. Puzzled, one student raised his hand and asked, "What gender is a computer?"The teacher wasn't certain which it was0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2021/10/kids-are-quick.htmlChildrenClean JokesHumornoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Thu, 28 Oct 2021 21:07:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8195201934747279576Kids Are Quick____________________________________TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.MARIA: Here it is.TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?CLASS: Maria.____________________________________TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.__________________________________________TEACHER: Glenn, 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/06/abcdefghijklmnopqrstvwxyz.htmlquotesrelationshipsnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Mon, 5 Jun 2017 21:54:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8222932669495304161Abcdefghijklmnopqrstvwxyz Did i miss something? of course I missed u.0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/divorced-barbie.htmlrelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Fri, 26 May 2017 22:23:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-295888078988527175Ralph is driving home one evening, when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present. He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store, and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?" In a condescending manner, she says, "Which Barbie?" She continues, "We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/am-i-pretty-or-ugly.htmlrelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Fri, 26 May 2017 22:13:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-7952054727482952734Girlfriend: "Am I pretty or ugly?"Boyfriend: "You're both."Girlfriend: "What do you mean?"Boyfriend: "You're pretty ugly." 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/is-google-male-or-female.htmlrelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Fri, 26 May 2017 22:07:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-4814131689964884856Q: Is Google male or female?A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion. 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/how-were-people-born.htmlrelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Fri, 26 May 2017 22:06:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-2315971180786411723A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/abcdefghijk.htmlrelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Fri, 26 May 2017 22:03:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8722397358617825099Wife: "How would you describe me?"Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."Wife: "What does that mean?"Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"Husband: "I'm just kidding!" 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/little-johny.htmlLittle JohnnyShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 23 May 2017 15:56:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-4295091686598411672 Little Johnny once bought his Grandma a very nice, luxurious toilet brush for her birthday. But when he went to visit her a couple of weeks later, it wasn't in the bathroom.Little Johnny asked his Grandma, “Gran, what happened to the toilet brush I gave you?”“Darling, I'm sorry but I just didn’t like it. It was too scratchy. After all those years, I’ve gotten used to the toilet paper.”0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/crown.htmlone line jokesShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 23 May 2017 15:49:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-5501381626041024234 Dentist: "You need a crown." Patient: "Finally someone who understands me" 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/cross-breed.htmlanimalsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 23 May 2017 15:44:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-6518615579797496117What do you get when you cross-breed a cow and a shark?  I don’t know, but I wouldn't enjoy milking it.0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/snow-woman.htmlChristmas JokesFunny PicturesShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 23 May 2017 15:39:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-7968503044270366504 What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs. 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/life-with-blonde-teenager.htmlblonderelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 23 May 2017 15:21:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8482549538238529074 SCENE: My teenage daughter and me in the car.Lauren: Dad, do you know what the most commonly used letter in a girl’s name is?Me: Hmm, is it a consonant or a vowel? (Silence.) Please tell me you know what consonants and vowels are.Lauren: You’re no fun, Dad. Forget it.Me: What is a vowel?Lauren: OK, OK. A vowel is … ahh … eh … well, oh … uh …Me: Close enough.0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/a-really-bad-day.htmlDrinking JokesHumornoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 16 May 2017 23:09:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-6992844251325089220 There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry.""No, it's not that. This 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/big-fight.htmlrelationshipsShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 16 May 2017 22:59:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8569078394235642928 A man walks into a bar and tells the bartender he just had a fight with his wife.Too bad, says the bartender.How it end?Well,replies the guy,when it was over, the old lady came to me on her hands and knees.What she say?asks the bartender.She said,Come out from under that bed, you little chicken shit. 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/big-trouble.htmlHumorShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Tue, 16 May 2017 22:53:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-2813165246652197343The population of this country is 300 million.160 million are retired.That leaves 140 million to do the work.There are 85 million in school.Which leaves 55 million to do the work.Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal government.Leaving 15 million to do the work.2.8 million are in the armed forces.Which leaves 12.2 million to do the work.Take from that total the 10.8 million people 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/10-missed-calls-from-wife.htmlHumorrelationshipsnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Wed, 10 May 2017 20:43:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-9131462982904853375 All men are brave,Horrors movies don't scare them...But.....10 missed calls from wife-----surely does!0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/apple.htmlHumorrelationshipsnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Wed, 10 May 2017 20:29:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-3224722430708057311 Through Apple - Vitamin Through Vitamin - Power Through Power - Work Through work - Money Through Money - Love Through Love - Marriage Through Marriage - Wife Through Wife - Tension Through Tension - Illness Through Illness- APPLE0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/in-marriage.htmlHumorrelationshipsnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Wed, 10 May 2017 20:24:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8950958117805425918 In marriage, daughter runs and goes back to her room.. Mother stops her on the way and says: please do not go back, just go with your hubby. Daughter: Please leave me, I am just going back to take my phone charger, it is gonna die! 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/dogs-credit.htmlanimalsHumornoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Wed, 10 May 2017 20:21:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-3909297467147390144On the wall there was a note - Dogs are peeing.But a man still did it.Another man asked: why you are doing so?He replied: See I am doing and it goes to dog's credit. 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2017/05/empty-stomach.htmlHumorShort Funny Jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Wed, 10 May 2017 20:08:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-928279992243423018How many Pear you can eat when your stomach is empty? Girl: 7 Pears. No, you are wrong, you can eat only one. Girl: How can you say that. Because when you eat 2nd Pear, your stomach will not empty! 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2015/08/consumer-labels.htmlAdvertisingone line jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Mon, 3 Aug 2015 17:08:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-2083732980238908149In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed by stupidity, here are some actual label instructions found on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special.) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. On a Swann frozen dinners: Serving 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2015/08/real-water-bed.htmlAdvertisingFunny Videosnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Mon, 3 Aug 2015 16:59:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-8133207813919618708Real Water Bed Video ads   Wanna try this real Water Bed ? :D 0http://shortfunny-jokes.blogspot.com/2015/08/short-funny-dirty-jokes.htmladult jokesDirty jokesone line jokesnoreply@blogger.com (Andre)Mon, 3 Aug 2015 16:45:00 +0700tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8996038589852187685.post-7888220150747621675Funny Dirty Joke 1 What has one hundred balls and screws old ladies? Bingo Funny Dirty Joke 2 What is a lesbian’s favorite thing to eat? A Klondike Bar Funny Dirty Joke 3 What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an “A” bra. Funny Dirty Joke 4 What is better than a cold Bud? A warm bush. Funny Dirty Joke 5 What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman? Sexual harassment. Funny Dirty Joke 6 What is it 0