Have in mind that I’m talking about my mother’s mother and her husband. He is not my biological grandfather, but I’ve seem him as a grandfather figure for most of my life. Like I’ve mentioned before, he is my grandmother’s sixth husband. WTF, SIXTH?! Yes, sixth. And even scarier is the fact that the first five husbands died being married to her. I’m totally not implying she murders them! :P

Grandma, CDs and scaring people away

So the other day my grandma asked if I had “cassettes for recording CDs”. What? I asked her to clarify what she meant. “You know, the thing that you use to record a CD”. I told her my computer could be used for that. She gave me a long, cold, blank stare. “No, I meant the blank cassette where you record the music to when you record a CD”. So I figured she wanted a blank CD and gave her some, and I still have no idea what she wanted them for. Maybe to create rainbow-like reflections in her room? To eat them? No idea.

Did I mention she slaps and yells to broomsticks, and then places the behind the bathroom door to get rid of unwanted visitors? That’s how I know if she likes or not the friends I bring home. When I have a friend over, I wait a while and then check the back of the bathroom door to see if she has put a broomstick there. I’ve found a couple so far, especially when I had that boyfriend that she hated.

She used other direct methods to push him away too, like saying “you are too short and skinny for her, how are you going to lift her when you get married? she needs a real man”. My boy and I were upset by then, but now we are friends and look back and laugh. What else can we do?

Grandpa and technology

My cousin gave my grandfather an archaic form of a “portable” CD player. You should have seen how excited he was. He asked how he could watch Tom & Jerry or the Carebears on his CD Player like I watched videos on my “little machine” (my iPod). I wanted to squeeze the life out of him with a hug. I mean, how cute is that? I didn’t know how to tell him that his CD player could only play music from CDs. Specially because he doesn’t have any CDs, and his music collection consists solely on tapes. So he only uses it to listen to the Don Omar CD that was in the CD Player when he got it. And he has to watch Tom & Jerry and the Carebears on the television, for now.

I know I’ll probably be a grandma someday, and my grandchildren will laugh of my ideas and behavior. But that’s the circle of life, right?

So, share your grandparent stories! :)

For every thing that I love, there is its opposite, which I hate. So it’s a pretty nice balance. When my hate for something comes to light, then I realize how much I actually love the opposite feeling.

An hour ago, I inserted a dollar in a juice vending machine. I pressed the button for grape juice and nothing came out. I pressed it again, and nothing. So I pressed the button for apple juice, and nothing happened. I ended up pressing every single button, and the stupid machine didn’t give me my juice. I pressed the money-return button and it didn’t give my dollar back either.

I wouldn’t have been so angry if:

• I hadn’t been so thirsty,
• I hadn’t been so hungry,
• I wasn’t late for work and
• That wasn’t my last dollar

But yeah, I was hungry, thirsty, late for work and that was my last dollar. So I just walked away from the vending machine (that was secretly laughing at me, I know) and went to work.

I was (and still am) very angry and thinking of how much I hated that machine and the situation. So I realized how much I love when I press the buttons of vending machines and my juice actually comes out. I also love when the money comes out after pressing the money-returning button.

So even though I’m full of hatred, it’s not a terrible thing, because I am equally full of love. Cheesy, but balanced. Now I just have to learn to love the small things.

Now, who hates those stupid vending machines? :P

So, I fed the chickens, the fishes, the cockatiels, the parrot, the dog, the cat and decided that I don’t want to have that many pets, ever. Not only do they stink up your place, they are also very noisy. Specially parrots.

The only special thing about this experience was that… *drum roll* …I got bored a couple of times. I’m the anti-boredom queen. I was so convinced that I could never ever experience the so called feeling of boredom. I always have things to do. Books to read. Papers to write. Pictures to take. Art to draw. Ideas to think. Goals to achieve. But during a four-day break from school, away from home and my things and my computer, I found myself helpless. Nothing to do. At all.

Since I hadn’t been that bored in years and years, this experience helped me find out what I do in boring situations: I talk. Boy, I talk a lot. I remember lying on the bed, talking to myself in different accents. I stopped talking when my sister came into the room, and then started talking to her about the endosymbiotic theory. Without her asking or anything, but it was really the first thing that came to my mind. I kept talking and talking until 2am, when she fell asleep.

Next time I’ll bring a book, just in case. I can’t tolerate being bored again, ever. There’s no time to waste being bored. So many things to do, so little time. Also, when you find something to do after being bored, please don’t attribute it to boredom. How about crediting inspiration for once? :D

We got to the house with our sofa and started to get it down.

That’s when I noticed the guy from the house across the street, who was standing in front of his house, looking at us. We were pulling the heavy sofa out of the SUV when the asshole starts laughing at us.

It wasn’t a smile, or a mild giggle - he was laughing out loud (lol’ing :P) at us. We stared at him in disbelief, his laugh turned into a big smile, and we decided to ignore him.

So we moved the sofa into the house, being observed all the time by the ‘humorous’ guy from the across the street. And there, we the helpless princesses moved that huge sofa by ourselves, without breaking a nail or messing up our hairs.

My sister is already plotting revenge. She wants to sit on a beach chair, with her dark sunglasses on, eating spicy Doritos, and lol’ing at him every time he came out of his house.

First, the heat is horrible, I hate the heat. Second, it’s that class I’m taking that is sucking out all my life energy. Robmarie was right when she predicted my death this summer. Third, this house is a battlefield - my mom hates my grandma and vice versa, and that leads to the fourth, we’re moving out of this house soon, and it’s not fun to move furniture around. I always had a big strong man around to do that for me. Now we have to do the dirty work ourselves. And fifth, a family friend is going on vacation, and my mom decided that we should go do house-sitting until she comes back from vacation. I think the idea of living in someone else’s house for a week as if it were a resort is really creepy, but hey, I’m leaving today.

I might not be around this week, unless I decide that using our friend’s computer while she’s in another country is not creepy.

Crappy summer - I guess I’m almost in “the real world” now :P

Needing a bigger wallet.
Who carries so much shit around all the time that a normal-sized wallet becomes useless? Well, me. Apparently. Lately, my old wallet looked all fat and overstuffed - even after taking out everything that wasn’t really necessary. So, I got a new wallet too. It’s huge. It’s bigger than my mom’s and my grandma’s. It even has a room for a checkbook, and I’m not even old enough to have checks.

Needing a bigger umbrella
For many years, I thought umbrellas were embarrassing. My dad got me an umbrella when I was in middle school and I never even took it with me, because the sole thought of umbrellas was so embarrassing. I know, silly. When I started college I saw myself “forced” to use one, and bought the smallest possible umbrella. I’ve learned that those don’t really work. So the size of my umbrellas have been increasing over the past two years (I’ve had many because I break them all the time, somehow). The same day I got the mug and the wallet, I got a bigger umbrella. I love it, and I’m so not embarrassed by it. What was I thinking before? (Oh yeah, that umbrellas are for old people)

Needing a bigger bag
My stuff doesn’t fit in my tiny bag anymore. That’s a consequence of getting what I’ve mentioned before (except the mug, of course). So last night I changed all my things to the only large bag I have, and it looks like it’s about to go kaboom. I never thought I had to resort to oversized bags, you know, those that look like the girl carrying it fits inside the bag. But it looks like I have some more shopping to do. I’m not complaining though ;)

Feeling like your parents (and grandparents)
All of the above makes me feel like my mom and my grandmother. My mom with her big coffee mug and large wallet and my grandma with her humongous bags and gigantic umbrellas. Thinking about it, maybe I’ll just keep “needing” bigger things as I grow older and older.

What makes you feel like you are growing old?

This is probably the second time that I manage to keep a website for this long. The first one was a sailor moon fan site. So… this is my first blog to make it this long. My other blogs have all died miserably (and prematurely).

I hope to stay around for a while, preferably for years to come. I think I will, because I have amazing visitors that inspire me to!

On a different subject, I recently joined Plurk, and I can’t stop using it! I never fell for Twitter, but this one got me. It’s addictive, and I’m inviting you to join! If you already have an account, feel free to add me as a friend :)

Dad: I want you to be honest.
Me: Ok…
Dad: Did you come here (to his house) today?
Me: No, why?
Dad: Did your sisters come here today?
Me: No, they have been home all day.
Dad: Don’t lie to me!
Me: What happened? Don’t tell me that you found…
Dad: A huge turd in my toilet!
Me: *lolololol* Again? It wasn’t us, dad.
Dad: Well, you are the only one who has a key tho my house!
Me: Grandma has a key too.
Dad: My mom wouldn’t come downstairs to shit in my toilet!
Me: Well, she’s upstairs and I certainly didn’t drive 15 minutes to shit in your toilet. Maybe it was you this morning.
Dad: Me! Impossible! That turd was 2 feet long! I’d go to the doctor the day that something that huge comes out of my ass!
Me: *roflmaoooo*
Dad: I spent 15 minutes trying to flush it!
Me: I don’t know dad… it wasn’t me or my sisters.
Dad: I’m changing the lock and I’m not giving you a key.
Me: Fine…

Ewwness and lolness aside, I really wonder who shits in his toilet when he’s not home. Maybe he has a poopy ghost. Or maybe he does it himself and then doesn’t remember!

1. Nothing

I’ve been a complete bed potato for the last three weeks. I rarely make it out of my room. But the food is out there, and the bathroom too, so I sometimes go out. But that’s me when there’s no school or work.

Where I don’t go is out out. Well, that’s a lie - I just went out, and that’s why I’m writing this. But before that, I hadn’t gone out in a long time. To go out I need to put clothes on, because fruity pajamas just don’t do it when you have 250 neighbors and live in a corner where 1024314 cars drive by every day.

Anyway, today I had to change and go outside to move my car, because our neighbor Abraham was trimming the grass near my usual parking spot in front of my house. Why was he trimming our grass? I don’t know, but I rather not do it myself, so I just move the car and let him do grass.

When I stepped outside Abraham started to talk to me:

Abraham: Hey! What’s that you study at college about food?
Me: Er… nutrition? culinary arts? I don’t know what you are talking about!
Abraham: What you study at college!
Me: I don’t study food…
Abraham: You don’t eat meat!
Me: Right, I don’t.
Abraham: The food that God sends us is clean! Meat is edible! And if you chose to be a vegetarian for the health of your body, that’s nonsense! What you have to clean and keep healthy is your soul for God!
Me: Ok… *Opens car door*
Abraham: It’s in the Bible! Clean your soul and not your body! Not the body! God takes care of that!
Me: Ok, I’m moving my car now *gets in the car*
Abraham: You… *shuts up when he sees that I’m not listening*

So, what the hell!? I was going to tell him that I don’t believe in God either, but that would have gotten me nailed right there. Definitely, he is now the reason why I won’t go out. I wonder who told him I didn’t eat meat. I have an insane neighbor! I should have known better, since the time he organized a fricking cult in front of my house at 11pm! With microphones, loudspeakers and lots of hideous singing. I know he is my neighbor, so it’s his street to, but this can’t be right:

He does it all the time during the day, but damn, where’s the consideration for other people - 11pm? At that time, even thieves are sleeping. Well, at least my grandparents were (not that they are thieves). They woke up angry and called the police. Have I ever mentioned here that my grandparents are very mean? I’ll leave them for another blog entry. I’m too disturbed by Abraham right now.

I started my final exams about two and a half weeks ago, and I’m done with that now. I studied really hard for every single exam I had, because I care about school. I care a lot.

Apparently, some of my classmates from my biology class decided that studying was for chumps, and that they’d be better off stealing the final exam, so they could plan their answers beforehand using the book as a source, of course. The next day I got an email from the biology exam coordinator saying that they knew about the leak and the exam had been nullified for everyone, because they couldn’t identify who was involved. Everyone who was depending on that exam to pull up their grade, well, that didn’t happen.

I still got an A in that class, but it really angers me to think that a lot of people got their tests unfairly nullified. It angers me even more that the students who cheated didn’t get caught, and that they’ll probably graduate with a higher GPA than honest hard-working students. And they’ll probably be in all my classes these years to come.

I know I shouldn’t hate the cheating students, or wish them bad things. So the next diagram has nothing to do with them. At all. It’s completely unrelated to the situation.