I didn’t have the benefit of being a “cool” kid. I went to prep school, and by 13 I was already a gangly, moustached maths whizz and tournament chess player, whose musical tastes had barely moved on from Boney M.

As a gay teenager, my musical preferences moved on to Bronski Beat, Frankie, and the magisterial Pet Shop Boys. I knew nothing of the androgyny and supposed bisexuality of David Bowie, I knew him as the guy who sang Heroes at Live Aid, and who then recorded a godawful cover version of a great Motown hit, with Mick Jagger.

It wasn’t my childhood that Bowie lit up, it was my adulthood. Not for his image, his constant reinvention, his cultural daring. But simply for the astonishing brilliance of his music.

But this is not a blog about how brilliant David Bowie was. That would be pointless, as so many others with greater knowledge and understanding will say it so much better. This is a blog saying….it’s ok to mourn. It is ok to mourn people that you have never met. There is a new sport in this social media age, the sneering pose. “Look at those losers, losing their shit over someone they have never known. I bet they wouldn’t mourn their own family and friends with a fraction of the passion.”

Along with the sneer is the accompanying belief that any sadness expressed on social media is a cynical, bandwagon-jumping affectation which has more to do with self-promotion than any genuine sense of loss. This ignores the fact that any social media outpouring is a form of self-promotion. That is the whole point of social media. The challenge is to find a balance. But we are all flawed, imperfect people who make mistakes. That doesn’t mean our motives are always insincere.

I was upset yesterday. I was not devastated in the same way as when I learnt about the deaths of snooker player Paul Hunter, or cricketer Ben Holllioake, two hugely talented sportsmen whose lives were stolen in horrific, untimely fashion. I was not as devastated as many of my friends, for whom Bowie was much, much more than simply a creator of great music. And it is, of course, entirely ok to be utterly unmoved by the news. But to wear your apathy as a badge of honour, to take pride in the fact that unlike the plebs, you don’t care, says more about you than it does about those you consider to be emotionally incontinent.

I’d rather be emotionally incontinent than spend my life trying to cling on to the stiff upper lip. It’s a sign that you are living a life, not suppressing it. Every car journey I undertake starts with me listening to Absolute Beginners. Why? It is alphabetically first on my iPod. It is nobody’s favourite Bowie song, and yet it is still majestic. Such is the measure of the man. If you can’t mourn the passing of the greatest rock star of your life, then who can you mourn?

1. Whatever you see on telly was recorded months ago. We don’t really remember very much about it. So when you tweet “You should be ashamed”, the reality is that we were temporarily embarrassed many months ago, got on with our lives, and are now long over it.
2. In a world of ISIS, Donald Trump, and the Tesco ads, a player taking a negative lower offer to try and help their team is not the worst thing in your lives. It really isnt, and it can be a vital tactic.
3. I don’t know much about Harry Potter, westerns, motor cars and current soaps. But I’m not stupid. I played county level chess, represented my school at maths, have recorded Radio 4 programmes about history, am a published author,sort of understood Donnie Darko,  and finished in the top 10 at the 2015 European Quizzing Championships. Yes I have made extraordinarily stupid life decisions and will continue to do so. But tweet me to tell me I am stupid, and you reveal far more about your own prejudices than you do about me.
4. Overweight people are allowed to take part in quiz shows without having to put up with abuse. They had the courage to appear on telly, Mr Probably Overweight Armchair Warrior did not.
5. If you honestly think we have thrown questions, you literally have no idea about the mindset of a quizzer. We are bigheaded and insecure in equal measure. That is why we do the job. All we want to do is answer as many questions correctly as possible, as fast as possible, and to as big an audience as possible. Furthermore, there is no reason to throw a quiz. Quite often, the team of four in front of us is just too good for us.
6. Our characters are panto. The reason I am nice to contestants is not because I am nice. It is because by the time I joined the show, all the nasty roles had gone. Shaun is actually one of the most upbeat and warm human beings you will ever meet, and just pretends to like football.

The show, imo, successfully blends general knowledge and entertainment. It is great fun to record, and regardless of result is always played in an absolutely sporting way by contestants and Chaser alike. If we didn’t lose big from time to time, if we didn’t have a shocking day at the office occasionally, or indeed sometimes play way better than average, then people would stop watching soon enough. Enjoy the new episodes, rather than get angry. There are plenty more thrills, spills, triumph and heartache to come.

I have a show, one that I took to the Edinburgh Festival in 2015. Casting modesty aside, the show did well with a string of four and five star reviews, and audiences often heard laughing. It is called “Postcards from the Z List”, and it is a scabrous look at the last five years of my life, juggling family, love and extremely minor celebrity. It is not for the easily offended, the instinctively homophobic, or Phil Tufnell fans. It has lots of jokes.

In 2016, I am taking the show on tour after hugely enjoyable gigs last autumn in Sheffield, Southport and Huddersfield. Apart from at the Soho Theatre, and at Glasgow, there will be a support act, a Q + A session post gig, and book signing. My book, that is.

The 2016 tour dates will be on my website soon. But I need to sell tickets now. So here they are. Hope to see you soon x

Friday 22nd January.

Starting the ball rolling, it is South Street arts centre in Reading.

http://readingarts.com/southstreet/event.asp?id=SXDF-A78273F2

Friday 29th January

Welcome to Norden Farm Arts in Maidenhead.

https://norden.farm/events/paul-sinha-postcards-from-the-z-list

Monday 15th to Saturday 20th February

I start a six night run at the Soho Theatre.

http://www.sohotheatre.com/whats-on/paul-sinha-postcards-from-the-z-list/

Saturday 5th March

The delightful Artrix in Bromsgrove.

http://www.artrix.co.uk/whats-on/comedy/paul-sinha-postcards-from-the-z-list/

Tuesday 8th March

The Unity Theatre in the magnificent drinking city of Liverpool.

https://www.unitytheatreliverpool.co.uk/whats-on/paul-sinha.html

Thursday 17th March

Colchester Arts Centre

http://www.colchesterartscentre.com/events/comedy/paul-sinha-postcards-from-the-z-list/

Saturday 19th March

Stand Comedy club, Glasgow. Great club, great city, great festival.

http://www.thestand.co.uk/show/27129/paul_sinha_%E2%80%93_postcards_from_the_z-list

Sunday 20th March

Tobacco Factory, Bristol

https://www.tobaccofactorytheatres.com/shows/paul-sinha-postcards-from-the-z-list/

Thursday 7th April

My stage debut in Melton Mowbray.

https://meltontheatre.cloudvenue.co.uk/paulsinhapostcardsfromthezlist

Saturday 16th April

Theatr Colwyn, Colwyn Bay

http://www.theatrcolwyn.co.uk/shows/P24/

Saturday May 14th

Key Theatre, Peterborough

http://www.vivacity-peterborough.com/event/paul-sinha

Tuesday May 31st

And finally…………….RUNCORN

http://www.thebrindley.org.uk/

Great win, by the way, one that I didn’t see coming. It was a terrible fight, and one that Wladimir Klitschko rather forgot  to turn up to. But Fury, to his credit, executed his plan perfectly. He never lacked an iota of self belief that his unorthodox tactics would flummox the veteran champion, that his relatively unfashionable and unrefined coterie could arrive in Germany and gatecrash a smug, corrupt boxing party.

Leaving the dullness of the actual boxing aside, this was an upset that should have viscerally thrilled me, a fighter quintessentially British in his stylings causing a great upset and taking down an iconic Klitschko. But self respect is an important thing. How can I support a man, who quite defiantly would never bring himself to support me?

Fury’s comments on the subject of homosexuality are now well documented. Like so many before him, and no doubt after him, he has skimmed the Bible and deliberately ignored the bits about love, the admonishments about the worship of wealth, the calls to reject acts of violence and turn the other cheek – incidentally a tactic which did Klitschko no good at all. Like so many who seek find solace and inspiration in applying ancient texts to a modern context, he has simply read and interpreted what he wants to. There is nothing new in that at all. But in a world where sports stars are increasingly media trained to be inclusive in their outlook, there is something new about a world champion ignorantly comparing homosexuality to paedophilia. And he won’t back down now. He knows that he has an army of knuckle dragging fans who would rather parrot his words than question them. He knows that his image depends on him not backing down, of maintaining a “man’s man” reputation. Twitter is already now awash with many Fury fans bandying the words “libtard”, “PC” “offendatrons”, because to actually analyse why his words are so stupid would hurt their tiny brains.

So what is an inclusive, metropolitan, sophisticated organisation like the BBC to do? Should they listen to the increasing clamour to remove Tyson Fury from their SPOTY list?

Despite being a relentless and tedious haranguer on the subject of gay rights, the answer in my opinion is no. Tyson Fury is on that list on merit. For all that SPOTY may claim to be rewarding personality, it is, first and foremost, rewarding achievement. To try and take away Fury’s sense of achievement would be entirely counterproductive. Sad to accept, but Fury is likely to be far from alone in his views, he is just unusual in expressing them so vociferously. And he is certainly not alone in being a sports icon with morally questionable attitudes.

I cannot see any benefit whatsoever in Fury becoming a martyr for free speech and thinking, giving his entrenched beliefs the glamorous veneer of illegitimacy. I have no interest in silencing homophobes, I have an interest in exposing them to scrutiny. The “PC gay lefty brigade” (of whom I am proud to be a part) should not, in my opinion, be about denying Fury a place in the pantheon of sporting greats. He has earnt that place though his hard work, skill and dedication. They should be explaining that this sporting superstar is, for all his success, a colossal bellend.

It is not that Tyson Fury will ever care. He has a dedicated coterie of friends and family, a devoted fanbase, a Batman outfit, and an immense belief both in himself and the idea that Jesus was a boxing fan. Try and silence him, and the only person who will benefit is Tyson Fury himself. It would be nice if more people in sport had the guts to be critical rather than unconditionally fawning over Fury. But I have long realised that being openly critical of homophobia is something very few sports stars can be bothered with. As for the rest of us,  when SPOTY comes around, get off your backsides vote for your favourite sports star. Because that is exactly what Fury fans will be doing.

“Dreams are like children. Follow them for too long and people start getting suspicious.”

The brilliant comedian Markus Birdman. @birdmanwatching 

Talking of dreams, on Saturday afternoon I was enjoying an average quality lunch  buffet in a remote business hotel in Rotterdam. I was tired, hungover after three days of heavy drinking. As I stood at the buffet, pondering how much smoked salmon on my plate would be considered greedy, I was approached by Jane Allen, who helps run the British Quiz Association with a charming bear of a man called Chris Jones.

“Paul, have you heard the scores?”

I metaphorically shat my pants. “Nope”

“You’re in the final 10. You finished joint 8th”

At which point I metaphorically lost all my physiological faculties and descended into an embarrassing, weepy mess. Somehow, and extremely unexpectedly, I had achieved one of my life dreams.

I say “life”. This one started in November 2010, when I attended the European Quiz Championships both as a first time contestant, and as part of a Radio 4 documentary about high level quizzing that I was making. I don’t know whether it was the addictive air of intellectualism, or the romantic beauty of the Derby Conference Centre, arguably the most stunning of the buildings in the “Venice of the East Midlands”, but i was transfixed. The individual championships consisted of a 100 question written paper, at the end of which the top 10 scorers would take part in a twenty question shootout. In front of assorted spectators. I watched those twenty questions with fascination. I knew three of the answers, Jack Kerouac, Helen Frankenthaler and Gym Class Heroes. I barely understood the other 17 answers.

And I thought to myself, “Wouldnt it be good to one day be part of that assembled final 10?”

I knew in my heart of hearts that it would be impossible. The quality of the players who trekked in the following years to Bruges, Tartu, Liverpool and Bucharest was just insanely good. I knew my dream was a forlorn one. I knew that eventually I would have to accept that it would join the dreams dustbin along with chess grandmaster, world figure skating champion, Have I got News for You guest, and Mrs Joe Root. So I sat down on Saturday morning in Rotterdam, for the European Quizzing Championships individuals, with no higher ambition as to not make any silly mistakes.

Within two rounds that ambition was in tatters. I skilfully crossed out the correct answer twice in Round 1, and in Round 2, I am sure that i was the only person in the room not to identify “sanskrit” as a correct answer. Sanskrit ffs. At this point all I could visualise was my parents’ disappointed faces.

You need a lot of luck in quizzing. When I woke up I did one piece of revision. I looked at nine questions I had written about this years Grammy awards. The very last fact that I wrote was that St Vincent had won the award for Best Alternative Album. I had literally no idea whether it was a man, a band or a woman. But i wrote it down for a question and got it right.

Before Round 8, the final round, they announced the current top 10. In joint 9th place was…………..Paul Sinha. What the serious fuck.Why didnt I get Sanskrit ???? Sixteen questions to go. Get good guesses in, keep calm. Then there was my dream question. Something about the African country with the lowest human development index.  I had read it on the toilet, literally five days ago. I had made an effort to make a mental note. Thank you the increasingly slow bowels of middle age. It is bloody Niger. I know this one. It’s bloody Niger.

There were 45 minutes between the end of the quiz and Jane Allen telling me I had done enough. 45 torturous minutes. The rest was a blur. Those final 20 questions flew by, as I became increasingly aware that i was the weakest quizzer in the final ten by a country mile. I had no idea who Super Mario’s sworn enemy was, about palm mangroves in Elche, or the most famous battle of 1212. I did know which Wagner opera was set in Rome, which pleased me. I slipped from 8th to 10th as I knew I would. It didnt matter. I know I am not as good as these other 9. It was fun to be part of their gang.

There I am. With Tom, Thomas, Igor, Tero, Kevin, Ronny, Didier, Pat and the eventual winner the all conquering Olav Bjortomt. Missing is one of the world’s best quizzers, Nico Pattyn. He couldn’t make it. i have no idea why he couldn’t make it, but I am grateful for his absence.

I don’t care that my dreams have changed from changing the world, to doing quite well in a quiz tournament. Scale down your dreams, and you may just achieve them.What can never be taken away is that for thirty extremely hungover minutes in Rotterdam, I was one of the ten best quizzers in Europe.

Joe Root. You are next.

I wish that my life was  packed with colourful incidents to the degree that this blog was a must read. But it isnt. Yesterday, I went on a road trip to a gig in Glastonbury. The driver and passengers were impeccable human beings, the club itself was a delight, nothing weird happened, nobody called me a poof, nothing happened that I could exaggerate and use as a metaphor for the human condition. I am in Bedford tonight, I hope this changes.

I have been quizzing a lot, both onscreen and offscreen. It’s been emotional. I always love it when people on social media/ digital spy accuse us of occasionally throwing questions or indeed games. I love their absolute confidence in their delusion. So confident, that they will happily libel hardworking, proud/smugly arrogant people. So I shall say it once more. None of us have ever thrown a question let alone a game. Sometimes, incredibly, we are just shit.

I love that Daily Mail “journalist” Amanda Platell, and many goggle-eyed slavering idiots genuinely believe that the BBC are trying to mould society in their own image, by fixing it for a Muslim woman to win a baking contest. Anyone au fait with my work, will know that I do not believe we are a racist nation, far from it. But it still saddens me that there are people out there who will judge you for your ethnicity/sexuality first, and assume that any success you may have achieved is purely because of that. In this sub Andrew Lawrence/James Delingpole world, white heterosexuals are constantly being oppressed, and any success achieved by anyone who falls outside of these demographics is to be viewed with suspicion. I think it was Voltaire who said “Fuck off”.

We live in increasingly violent times, with the threat of war looming ever closer. The thing that worries me most, is ticket sales. To that end, I have three shows to plug.

SHEFFIELD http://www.sheffieldtheatres.co.uk/event/paul-sinha-postcards-from-the-z-list-15/

SOUTHPORT http://www.southportcomedyfestival.com/showpages/adult/showpagepaulsinha.html

HUDDERSFIELD http://www.thelbt.org/Paul-Sinha-Postcards-Z-List

Oh, I am still single. I shall be going on a pub crawl in Wallasey tomorrow night, followed by a Saturday quiz event in Liverpool. http://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/quiz-in-the-north-4-tickets-17816521696

If you are hot and even vaguely bi curious, say hello.

1. Which of these events do you remember from your childhood ?

a) The Battle of Britain

b) The death of Michael Jackson

c) Gazza’s tears at Italia 90

2.   What is your greatest achievement ?

a) Literacy

b) Working out how Argos works.

c) Two centuries against the Aussies in the 2015 Ashes.

3.     Your favourite food is ?

a) Whiskey

b) Vegetarian

c) Home cooked lamb curry at the in laws.

4.        The perfect double bill is ?

a) Snakebite

b) Pretty Woman and Dirty Dancing

c) University Challenge and Only Connect

5.          Who did you vote in 2015 ?

a) UKIP

B) Voting will never change anything. Russell Brand is amazing

c) All the parties were an anathema to my longstanding lefty liberal beliefs, and I would rather not discuss it.

6.            Happiness

a) Is a cigar called Hamlet

b) Is a naive unachievable fantasy

c) Sounds a bit like “a penis”. Which is worth a giggle

7. Which of these celebrities is the hottest ?

a) Zac Efron

b) Nick Grimshaw

c) AR Rahman

8.     Who do you most look like ?

a) AR Rahman

b) Nick Grimshaw

c) Zac Efron

9.         The greatest stand up comedian of his generation is….

a) Roy Chubby Brown

b) Lee Nelson

c)   Daniel Kitson.

10.             Complete the saying. “If you really love someone you must……..”

a) Tell everyone on facebook

b) Marry him

c) Put up with his snoring.

11.                   What portmanteau word best describes you?

a) Shopaholic

b) What is a portmanteau?

c) Gaytheist

12.                       Being a gay man automatically means that I love…………

a) Made in Chelsea

b) Rihanna

c) Blokes.

13.                     I spend hours on youtube watching

a) Cats

b) Dapper Laughs

c) Dai Greene winning gold at the 2011 World Athletics Championships.

14.                 My ideal day out is….

a) Harry Potter World

b) Something vaguely outdoorsy

c)   A well organised buzzer quiz.

15.                   I simply cannot…….

a) tolerate silence

b) eat foreign food.

c) hum anything by Ed Sheeran

It goes without saying that it is “mostly c” that I am after here. 

I came up here with a few ambitions. To remind people that I can still craft an Edinburgh show, to sell more tickets, to enjoy the performance experience. Job done.

This Fringe is just vast. It always frustrates me when people try and reduce it to ten funny jokes, or some sort of leftwing v rightwing imagined battle. It has long been a far more complex, gloriously rich, dazzling and diverse artistic showcase. The Free Fringe, for all its internal political problems, has evolved into a behemoth, bringing comedy to a far wider audience and , I believe, making paid acts up their game. Reading the reviews, there seem to be considerably more 4 star than 2 star reviews. The nominations for the Fosters Comedy Award are notable not just for the intense creative ambition of the nominated shows, but also for the brilliance of various shows which narrowly missed out. No wonder they, yet again, took their time.

There are some on the club circuit who believe that the Fringe is an entirely pointless exercise. Try telling that to Seymour Mace, a much admired Fringe veteran whose perseverance has been richly rewarded with a nomination, or to George Egg, a circuit stalwart whom I first saw in 1995, and whose debut show this year was so original he has been selling out night after night. The Fringe is not just about discovering  telegenic youth.

Apart from my usual gripe, that there are some journalists who would not cross the North Bridge too see a show with no PR, if their lives depended on it, I am finding it hard to find negatives. I love it here. I love being associated with the Stand, an organisation run with friendly professionalism, and respect for the customer. This has been much my favourite room of my Edinburgh career. And indeed, it has been my favourite month. Right now, I have literally no idea what direction my standup is going to take in the next two years, as I feel I may have reached the natural end of the autobiography. but I will be back X