Soulgardeners

A dispatch from the lenten wilderness

2010-03-16T12:00:43+02:00

As you’ve probably noticed I haven’t blogged regularly.

The main reason for this is that I’m fasting technology during Lent after 5pm.

It is not the only reason.

The other is that I’m going through a very intense wilderness in person and also with the community I’m part of.

This wilderness is an experience brought on by God, so no need to panic.

Yet, this wilderness is showing me a lot of “new things” about God, myself and the calling he has called me with.

That phrase, “new thing” has popped up in the last week in different places. Yesterday I prayed through Isaiah 43 … the part where God talks to another group of wilderness dwellers/exiles. God speaks through Isaiah and admonishes,

¹⁸ Do not remember the former things,

or consider the things of old.

¹⁹ I am about to do a new thing;

now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?

I will make a way in the wilderness

and rivers in the desert.

I have this intense inner stirring that something new is coming. Last week one of my good friends spoke at Claypot’s gathering on her journey into God’s calling over the last year. She said at one point that it saddens her when people use the “newness and excitement” of what God is doing in her life as a substitute for not living their own story. She then encouraged everyone to find their own story and not just “use” her story.

This reminded me of mother Teresa who always encouraged people to “find their own Calcutta”.

Another place where this newness struck me was when I listened to Peter Block’s amazing book “Community: the structure of belonging”. In it he makes two statements that grabbed my attention. In the first one he talks about the danger of always listening to stories about other communities’ success. He goes on to say that,

“… that narratives of success give us hope and places to visit, but do not build our communities (emphasis mine). Social fabric and successful communities elsewhere cannot be imported. What works somewhere else ends up as simply another program here, which might be useful but does not shift the fundamentals we are after.”

Later on he warns against a methodology that “… becomes technique” and a “practice that becomes imitation”.

I sometimes wonder how much of networking really changes our communities. Is it birthing something true, authentic and more importantly - transformational in our community (community in this sense includes church but involves the actual cities around these churches)?

The last corollary to this “newness” came in the form of a quote sent by the people of Inward/Outward and I will quote it in full … Gordon Cosby notes that,

The majority of people are settlers. They like to settle a land pioneered by others. There are fewer paradigm shifters and paradigm pioneers, those who are ready, and sometimes even eager, to enter the new. The biblical understanding is that the new is always beckoning us. God, by definition, is "One who does a new thing." And our desperate need is for the new. A new neighborhood. A new city. A new world which respects and honors and cares for all of its people. The paradigm shifters and the pioneers are the ones who lead us into that newness.

Source: Sermon (September 7 1989)

The weight of every person

2010-02-23T15:15:40+02:00

“The church is a whore but she’s my mother” was the phrase that connected me with an American couple (Augustine said that). When Phil and Meg Williams introduced themselves we clicked and we started a conversation that has continued for the last two years.

Phil is an NFL agent and he has a plan. In the words on his website, “Our mission is to show athletes a better way, a path that leads to fulfilment and a hope that will not be empty.” He dreams of helping his multi-million dollar-player-clients to discover what Paul once termed, “the life that is truly life”. I think it is a wonderful calling and vocation (take some time to browse his site).

So for the past week friends and clients of Phil visited some care-points in Swaziland and then spent the last few days with our community. It was very interesting. I love to see how people of different countries experience Africa.

Three of the guys who visited play in the NFL and one of them was just on the winning Saints team. Let me tell you, these guys are huge (two of them weigh 150kg each). When they arrived I had to borrow my parent’s 4X4 because my car just didn’t have the firepower to carry these guys.

While they were here I experienced something that caught me by surprise. I thought that I would be excited to introduce my local friends to these NFL starts. What I experienced instead was my excitement to introduce the NFL stars to my friends.

On Sunday evening the tour group got the opportunity to sit in on our Sunday evening meeting where we are building friendships across race and socio-economic boundaries and on Monday we visited together in Zandspruit; the squatter community in the Northwest part of Johannesburg.

Today I’m thinking about the “weight” of every person.

In a celebrity culture it is so easy to only see the “weight” of superstars. The actors and actresses, the rich, the famous and the sporting heroes.

What I experienced yesterday was the weight of ordinary people. People like the mother of one of my friends.

While we were in Zandspruit he introduced me to his mother. She was busy cleaning their house. We made small talk about her son, my friend.

As we walked out he looked at me and said, “my mother is my hero”. There we were, a hundred metres from some of the icons of American stardom and my friend lifts up his mother as a hero.

In his eyes she is a 150kg giant – a person of weight.

In speaking to the American group it is obvious to me that my friends made a huge impact on them. This is the gift of my friends – they teach people about humanity.

They are my 150kg giants.

Some of them work long hours to support mothers, brother and sisters. One of them studies hard so that he can reach his dream …. to become a social worker who could help the community.

These people make me glad that I came back to South Africa. They are my tutors, teaching me what really matters. It is a privilege to be with these saints. I will leave you with one of my favourite CS Lewis quotes. It is from his essay, “The weight of glory”.

“It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities… that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations — these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit—immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.”

Ash Wednesday

2010-02-18T11:52:06+02:00

Every year, when Ash Wednesday comes around I experience the same tension. Should I sport a massive ashen cross on my forehead or not? For the past ten years that tension has been relieved through an act of committing to my community. Yesterday was no different.

As Gerald administered the ashes, he left me marked with a massive cross on my forehead. At six in the morning I was branded with the cross; commissioned to take it up on this day. The cross would be with me throughout the day and would attract curiosity, ridicule, questions and also a few nods of appreciation from fellow cross-bearers. It forces me to think how I am embodying Jesus' command to take up the cross daily.

Every year, on Ash Wednesday, the cross looses its shape throughout the day. I am a compulsive head scratcher and therefore I invariably touch the cross smudging it. At the end of the day the cross becomes a black blob. A circle.

As I reflect on this deformation on my forehead, I think of how I deform the cross. How we as followers of Jesus turn the cross into a blob. One way in which we deform the message is by changing the wonderful invitational message of the cross into a message of exclusion. When the blood of Jesus that flowed freely for everyone, becomes a pooled-up blob circling only in my life the deforming has happened.

Who’ll re-envisage the world?

2010-02-09T13:39:41+02:00

A dear friend led me to David Ford’s book “The shape of living”. It is an excellent explorations of how our lives are shaped. It is a book on the, extremely popular, topic of spiritual formation. Ford’s UK voice brings a freshness to the conversation and I’m learning a lot.

In one of the chapters entitled, “Faces and Voices – shaping a heart” Ford describes the people who comprise “the community of the heart”, those people who are allowed into the deepest parts of the heart. He comments that our “Our heart forms habits of welcoming and rejecting”.

In a poignant passage, which I’m quoting in full he talks about “The intrusion of the faceless”. He writes,

“We constantly meet with faces and voices which appeal to us to help, to have compassion, or to take some special responsibility that goes beyond what our commitments or obligations oblige us to do. These appeals cut across our friendships, marriages and in-groups. They pose one of the biggest questions to us and to our groups: how do we cope with the suffering poor, the hungry, the impaired, the marginalized, the victim? These may be the test of the right shaping of our hearts even more than friends, spouses or fellow group members. O’Siadhail’s poem ‘Intrusion’ graphically describes how the relationship of mutual love can be broken open by ‘the stricken’.

The gaze of loved and lover,

our amorous self-containment,

concentric and utterly present

to the other. Sweetest hour.

But what if between our gazes

shadows of the stricken fall,

the stares we seem to veil

keep on commanding us?

Our two-ness is never alone.

Whose is that intrusive face

that looms unseen between us

condemning all we haven’t done?

The eclipsed. The destitute.

O sly worm of dominance

Coiling its own discountenance,

our masks and blottings out.

Is love a threadbare blindfold?

‘Yes,’ say our shadows, ‘unless

you turn to face the faceless.’

Who’ll re-envisage the world?

As I read this passage and the poem it ripped me to pieces and reminded me deeply of our current South African context. Just think about how easily our lives revolve around people-like-us wherein we build relationships that become a cul-de-sac, blessing the already blessed. In the poem the line about the “Sweetest hour” reminds me of the high regard people place on gathering for a Sunday service so that they can consume a religious product after which they evaluate it with a “that was good” or a “that wasn’t so hot today”.

Then comes an interruption, the “shadows of the stricken”.

I think of the beggars at the robots, the squatter camps around our cities and the occasional person who gathers all their courage to actually walk up to us and make a claim with their presence. Also the lonely, the depressed, the successful without community and the poor without hope – shadows of the stricken.

The poem then challenges to face the faceless and asks the inviting question,

“Who’ll re-envisage the world?”

… Jesus still calls people into communities that face the faceless and re-envisage the world in the announcement of a kingdom that has come and will come – on earth as it is in heaven.

Walking with different gaits

2010-02-03T01:03:00+02:00

Every year I lead a bunch of people into the wilderness areas of our country. At some points the paths disappear and we walk in single file. In previous years we have spent up to ten hours on our feet walking through some of the most amazing terrain.

As we walk in single file, it is easy to look at the different styles people use to hike. The rhythmic sloughing usually reveals that when people are walking they find themselves in a rut. By changing the smallest of details in a specific gait, one can make a huge difference.

The same is true when we are on a journey with God. Every person has a specific walking style, that could either be life giving or energy sapping. Most Christians I know have been taught the walking style of “the quiet time”. It is the default style and there is nothing wrong with this walking style, it is just that there are so many variations on this style. The classic quiet time consists of Bible reading and prayer.

Those two styles are excellent for walking, but there are other gaits that could be incorporated in a journey with God. Gary Thomas in his excellent book, “Sacred Pathways” comments that,

“All too often, Christians who desire to be fed spiritually are given the same, generic, hopefully all-inclusive methods – usually some variation on a standarized quiet time. Why? Because it’s simple, it’s generic, and it is easy to keep people accountable to. But, for many Christians, it’s just not enough.” p.14

When we walk with God, it is good to change the way we walk. The companion stays the same, the style used for keeping up changes.

Was the 2nd of February 1990 a victory for the gospel?

2010-02-02T19:28:54+02:00

Today, twenty years ago FW de Klerk unbanned the ANC in a well-documented speech. I can’t remember it that well. I was too young and as a fifteen year old was just interested in one thing, rugby. What I do remember was that I was quite excited that the sport sanctions could finally be lifted and that “our” rugby and cricket teams could compete internationally.

I also remember the total fear amongst white people after the unbanning. I distinctly remember how white people became prophets of doom. People were saying that de Klerk gave our country away – that he was a traitor.

Earlier this morning I opened the leading Afrikaans newspaper’s website and saw a poll question. The question stated,

“Was FW de Klerk right in making his historic announcement on the 2^nd of February 1990?”

The results (which is definitely not a scientific poll) showed the polarization amongst the readers of the newspaper. 9400 People took part in the poll. A whopping 4999 (53%) voted NO. 3321 (35%) voted YES and 1080 (11%) were unsure.

I voted YES, and not just for rugby reasons. Since my life in High School I have come to appreciate the heart of God for those who are oppressed, what is called “God’s preferential option for the poor”.

As a follower of Jesus these statistics point me to the immense challenges facing Afrikaans churches in helping people to cross boundaries and immigrate into the New South Africa (I suspect a large proportion of the people who voted would describe themselves as Christians).

Today, another South African website published two letters to FW de Klerk; the first from Nelson Mandela and the second from Desmond Tutu. In Desmond Tutu’s letter (the second one) he describes the 2^nd of February 1990 as a day that he would call “Ubuntu Day”. He also says that the speech symbolized “an African dawn for the Afrikaner”.

In South Africa there are different versions of Afrikaners. To the far left are those who celebrate Ubuntu and would like to become Africans as Afrikaners. On the far right are those who recently voiced that they would like to start a separate Afrikaner state within South Africa. In between are different shapes, sizes and hues.

I am interested in how the good news of Jesus would interact with the 2^nd of February 1990. I propose that it was a very positive step in the direction of a grace-filled gospel movement for our nation.

Now, more than ever the church has a responsibility to help South Africans become human again. Thank you FW de Klerk for taking a bold step and freeing us all from, what Desmond Tutu described as, “a cruel and inhumane system”. Now it is our turn to be bold as followers of Jesus!

Getting a new rhythm with God

2010-02-02T12:41:11+02:00

God loves us. God loves you. When we engage with God, through Jesus, we respond to the God who is already in love with us. God can be described in different ways. In a recent book God has been described as “The good and beautiful God”.

When we journey with God then it is wise to consider our travel companion. AW Tozer once said that, “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us”.[1] I am discovering that for many Christians, the picture of their travelling companion is not that positive.

How would you describe your travelling companion?

Consider with me the invitation of Jesus in Matthew 11,

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

[1] The knowledge of the holy, p.1

Thesis moving to the next phase - do you want to help?

2010-01-28T11:44:02+02:00

I am done with the literature study for the thesis. In the literature part I examined the current discources on the teachings concerning wealth and faith of Clement of Alexandria, Basil the Great, John Chrysostom and Augustine. These fathers had specific instructions for the wealthy of their congregations and this moved them into a life of sharing with the poor.

In the second phase of the study I will be conducting interviews with four churches in the Johannesburg area. Today I am working on some of the questions I will be asking. The answers to these questions will be compared with the teachings of the fathers surveyed in the literature study.

The last part of the study will propose some ways to bring our churches in dialogue with the early church's teachings. It is my hope that this could contribute to creative interactions between the rich and the poor in South Africa. So here is the list of proposed interview questions (I will explore them in detail on the blog over the next few weeks):

How do you interpret the story of the Rich Young Ruler in Mark 10?
Do you have a friendship with a poor person? Describe the relationship.
What are the reasons why we don’t share more with the poor?
Do you think receiving an inheritance is just or unjust and what should a Christian do with an inheritance?
How often are the poor mentioned in your church’s liturgy?
Are Christians called to give charity or administer justice, what do you think is the difference between the two?
How do you determine between needs and wants?
How much should a follower of Jesus give and what percentage of your income do you give now?

In addition to these questions the following questions will be asked of the leaders of the congregations:

How often do you preach about the rich’s responsibility towards the poor?
What percentage of the church’s budget goes towards the poor?
How do you see your role as a leader in engaging with the poor?

How do these questions strike you? What would you add? Which ones are the hardest to answer?

Luxuries and necessities ... exploring the tension

2010-01-22T07:15:41+02:00

Today a good friend asked in a Tweet what luxury is he asks, “define luxury?$2 a day? $4?” He responded to a Clement of Alexandra quote I posted, “It is monstrous for one to live in luxury, while many are in want”.

This is obviously an immensely complicated question and I believe the reason why it is so difficult is because there are so many factors that determine a truthful answer. So without trying to be prescriptive, let me describe some of the elements I feel are needed to answer that question.

1. If we want to define luxury it is really helpful to explore that question with other people. I (and I think you) have an amazing ability to rationalize our luxuries into necessities. In the last few years I’ve kept an informal “rationalization journal” in which I write my rationalizations down. To give you an example, I am about to upgrade my phone and I’m seriously considering an Iphone. My reasons are …. So I write those reasons down and discuss it with people who know me. Having other people speak into our lives help a lot.
2. BUT. When you have people of more-or-less the same socio-economic level in a church/group you will find that the rationalizations are the same. Our creative ways of moving luxuries into necessities are not that many. So I recommend having the luxury chat with people who are not in your socio-economic subculture. This is tough, I know. Sometimes by just having people who are poor(er) in your house, the rationalizations get challenged. So in order to truthfully answer the luxury question become friends with poor people.
3. Have a yearly chat as a family about a standard of living that you feel comfortable about. Pray over it and study the Bible with your budget in mind. Become so comfortable about this ‘holy cow’ that you won’t mind sharing the details of your budget with trusted friends.
4. Go through your house and look at items that are taking up closet space. Those luxury items that have become such a luxurious item that you never use it (like that beautiful china set or the golf clubs signed by). Give it away or sell it and then give the money away. By walking through our house and noting the excess, we engage with the luxuries of your life.
5. Another way to determine if something is a real necessity is by abstaining from it and seeing if you can still function.

Defining luxuries in our lives are definitely not clear-cut or easy … but well worth to explore. The idea is to take the extra resources spent on luxuries …. and give it away.

A life of earning or yearning?

2010-01-21T17:05:57+02:00

God loves you. Really, He does. Faith is a response to God’s love. When our response attempts to earn or achieve God’s love it stand at risk to become distorted. As Claypot reconsiders membership for 2010 we are starting the year by memorizing 1 John 4.19,

We love (God), because He first loved us.

We are asking whether our disciplines are done in order to earn God’s love or to put ourselves in a place to receive God’s love. So, when I read Bible, pray, fast, do solitude is it a way of earning or yearning?