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	<title>SpiderFarmer</title>
	
	<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com</link>
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		<title>Matilda Klein dances at 94</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/04/16/matilda-klein-dances-at-94/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/04/16/matilda-klein-dances-at-94/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Apr 2012 14:22:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Life is for living]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2706</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is the most wonderful thing.  May we all spend our lives dancing. 

Via Metafilter
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This is the most wonderful thing.  May we all spend our lives dancing. </p>
<p><iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/8LOdmka4_90" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
<p>Via <a href="http://www.metafilter.com/114923/Just-Keep-Dancing">Metafilter</a></p>
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		<title>Caine’s Arcade</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/04/11/caines-arcade/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/04/11/caines-arcade/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Apr 2012 13:28:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kids]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sweet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[youtube]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2702</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is the sweetest thing, and has restored my faith in humanity.

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This is the sweetest thing, and has restored my faith in humanity.</p>
<p><iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/faIFNkdq96U" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></p>
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		<title>Don’t let Congress kill the internet</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/01/18/dont-let-congress-kill-the-internet/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/01/18/dont-let-congress-kill-the-internet/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 18 Jan 2012 17:17:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2694</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

Millions of Americans oppose SOPA and PIPA  because these bills would censor the               Internet and slow  economic growth in the U.S.
Two bills before Congress, known as  the Protect IP Act (PIPA) in the Senate and the   [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div>
<div id="stage">
<h1>Millions of Americans oppose SOPA and PIPA  because these bills would censor the               Internet and slow  economic growth in the U.S.</h1>
<p>Two bills before Congress, known as  the Protect IP Act (PIPA) in the Senate and the               Stop  Online Piracy Act (SOPA) in the House, would censor the Web and impose  harmful               regulations on American business. Millions of  Internet users and entrepreneurs               already oppose SOPA and  PIPA.</p>
<p>The Senate will begin voting on January 24th. Please let them know how you feel. <a href="https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/">Sign               this petition</a> urging Congress to vote NO on PIPA and SOPA before it is too late.</p>
<div><a href="https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/takeaction.pdf"><img src="https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/takeaction.png" alt="Chart: “Congress, Can You Hear Us?”" /></a>[<a href="https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/takeaction.pdf">PDF, 1.9                 MB</a>]</div>
</div>
</div>
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		<title>Texas Judge Forced Off Capital Case After Declaring State Death Penalty Law Unconstitutional</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/01/06/texas-judge-forced-off-capital-case-after-declaring-state-death-penalty-law-unconstitutional/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2012/01/06/texas-judge-forced-off-capital-case-after-declaring-state-death-penalty-law-unconstitutional/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Jan 2012 16:52:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Newsfilter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[death penalty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[justice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Texas]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2692</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Ian Millhiser on Jan 4, 2012 at 1:00 pm
Late  last month, Texas trial judge Teresa Hawthorne held that Texas’ death  penalty statue violates the Constitution because it grants too much arbitrary discretion to prosecutors. As a result of this decision, Hawthorne has now been deemed unfit to hear a capital case:
Teresa Hawthorne, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>By <a href="http://thinkprogress.org/author/ian-m/">Ian Millhiser</a> on Jan 4, 2012 at 1:00 pm</p>
<p>Late  last month, Texas trial judge Teresa Hawthorne held that Texas’ death  penalty statue violates the Constitution because it grants <a href="http://www.texasmoratorium.org/archives/1672">too much arbitrary discretion to prosecutors</a>. As a result of this decision, Hawthorne has now been deemed <a href="http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/unfairpark/2012/01/judge_who_declared_death_penal.php">unfit to hear a capital case</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>Teresa Hawthorne, <strong>the Dallas County judge who  ruled that the state’s death penalty statute was unconstitutional, must  recuse herself from a capital murder case, a judge ruled today</strong>. [...]</p>
<p>In his closing arguments, Doug Parks, another of Harris’s  attorneys, argued that the state simply didn’t like Hawthorne’s ruling  in the defense’s favor on some of the pre-trial motions. If she had  ruled in the state’s favor, he argued, “Her personal beliefs about the  death penalty wouldn’t matter one iota. … <strong>She made rulings the state didn’t like, and now they’re attacking the trial judge based on her personal beliefs and feelings</strong>.”</p>
<p>Ultimately, though, [Judge John] Ovard still ruled that a “reasonable  person” would have to conclude that Judge Hawthorne is too biased to  preside over the case.</p></blockquote>
<p>This is not law. Indeed, this is barely a mockery of law. If the  state disagrees with Hawthorne’s decision, then it is free to appeal it.  But when judges can be disqualified from hearing cases if they reach an  unpopular decision than the justice system truly is rigged.</p>
<p>And this isn’t even the first time Texas’ court system used the  threat of forced recusal against a judge who disagreed with the state’s  execution policies. In 2010, Judge Kevin Fine declared the state’s death  penalty statute unconstitutional because it was too likely to execute  an innocent person. Fine eventually withdrew the opinion, however, after  he was threatened with a <a href="http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/unfairpark/2012/01/judge_who_declared_death_penal.php">forced recusal hearing of his own</a>.</p>
<p>Lest there be any doubt, Texas accords far different treatment to  judges who demonstrate potential bias in favor of killing criminal  defendants. In 2007, Judge Sharon Keller, presiding judge on the highest  criminal court in Texas, likely <a href="http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2009/08/18/176675/texas-execution/">manipulated her court’s procedures</a> to prevent a death row inmate from receiving a stay of execution from  the United States Supreme Court. Although a state ethics panel initially  gave Keller a “public warning” for her actions, an appeals panel later <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sharon_Keller">wiped away even this slap on the wrist</a>.</p>
<p>Likewise, in 1994 Texas elected an unqualified attorney named Stephen  Mansfield to its highest criminal court. Judge Mansfield had been  disciplined for practicing law without a license in Florida and he was  arrested for <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/04/us/when-r-on-the-texas-ballot-may-not-be-enough.html">scalping tickets</a> to the Texas-Texas A&amp;M game on university property. He also was elected on a platform of <a href="http://www.law.northwestern.edu/journals/NJLSP/v3/n1/2/">promising harsher decisions in death penalty cases</a>.  Mansfield left the court after he decided not to run for re-election,  but he never faced one sanction for his macabre election strategy.</p>
<p>But if one little trial judge dares to suggest that the state’s death  penalty procedures are unconstitutional, she will be forced off capital  trials because this view could only stem from unreasonable bias.</p>
<p>Via <a href="http://www.thinkprogress.org/">ThinkProgress.Org</a></p>
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		<title>EA’s new business plan…selling user’s data to the highest bidder</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2011/08/24/eas-new-business-plan-selling-users-data-to-the-highest-bidder/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2011/08/24/eas-new-business-plan-selling-users-data-to-the-highest-bidder/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Aug 2011 15:51:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Babble]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2688</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;m one of those weird people that read EULAs, and have refused to install some software based on the rights asserted in them. EA has been on my &#8220;Egregious Violators&#8221; list since the whole Spore Debacle, but their newly launched downloader, Origins, takes privacy concerns to a whole new level. Origins is required to play [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m one of those weird people that read EULAs, and have refused to install some software based on the rights asserted in them. EA has been on my &#8220;Egregious Violators&#8221; list since the whole Spore Debacle, but their newly launched downloader, <strong><em>Origins</em></strong>, takes privacy concerns to a whole new level. Origins is required to play many of EAs games, since EA has severed relationships with other vendors like Steam.</p>
<p>If you have an old version of an EA downloader; you will be constantly prompted to switch to Origins. But installing Origins gives EA the right to have a service that:</p>
<ul>
<li>Is always on (not just when you&#8217;re playing an EA game)</li>
<li>Scans your ENTIRE system and reports back everything you have installed</li>
<li>Monitors internet usage and tracks browsing history</li>
<li>Sells that information to 3rd party advertisers</li>
</ul>
<p>It further goes on to reference the EA Privacy Policy which says: &#8220;<em>Information collected will vary depending upon the activity and may include your name, email address, phone number, home address, birth date, mobile phone number and credit card information.</em>&#8221; Further down, it reads: &#8220;<em>When you use EA online and mobile products and services or you play our games on your PC or console, we may collect certain non-personal demographic information including gender, zip code, information about your computer, hardware, software, platform, media, mobile device, mobile device ID, console ID, incident data, Internet Protocol (IP) address, network Media Access Control (MAC) address and connection. We also collect other non-personal information such as feature usage, game play statistics and scores, user rankings and click paths as well as other data that you may provide in surveys, via your account preferences and online profiles or through purchases, for instance.</em>&#8221;</p>
<p>Additionally, EA has plans to launch <a href="http://www.droidgamers.com/index.php/game-news/android-game-news/1726-ea-re-launches-origin-website-focus-also-coming-to-mobile-gamers-including-android">Origins on mobile devices, and have social network hooks</a>, so not only can they sell the data they can gather from your hard drive, they can also sell the data from your phone and your friend&#8217;s list. Nice.</p>
<p>Users who have installed Origins report that no icon for the service appears in the Windows Tray, but that multiple processes associated with it are running in the background constantly. I have read no reports of uninstall issues, so I don&#8217;t know if this app, like their rootkits did, will leave hooks in the system that make it almost impossible to remove.</p>
<p>See, here&#8217;s the thing that bugs me: I don&#8217;t want how I go about my daily life to be a cash point vector in someone else&#8217;s business plan. When I buy a product from a company; a fair exchange of currency for product has occurred.  That should be the end of the transaction. I should not, by virtue of purchasing a good or service, then be assigning to that company the right to continuously make money on me by selling the contents of my hard drive, or browsing history, or anything else.</p>
<p>It appears that EA doesn&#8217;t think it can make enough money by just selling, distributing or producing games.  That it has put in place a business plan whereby they continuously make money by selling their user&#8217;s data to the highest bidder. And while I want to support games, game developers, and the game universe as a whole, I unilaterally refuse to sign up to give my data away for free so some EA executive can have a new Bugatti.</p>
<p>Further reading:</p>
<p>‘<a href="http://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=998565">I’ve Got Nothing to Hide’ and Other Misunderstandings of Privacy </a>” by Daniel J. Solove.</p>
<p>RockPaperShotgun writes: <a href="http://www.rockpapershotgun.com/2011/08/24/eas-origin-eula-proves-even-more-sinister/">EA’s Origin EULA Proves Even More Sinister.</a></p>
<p>Escapist Forum Member <em>The_root_of_all_evil </em><a href="http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/9.308724-EAs-Origin-is-creepy-and-watches-you-sleep#12457649">goes through the EULA</a> with a fine tooth comb.</p>
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		<title>Flash Fiction Challenge: Strangers in the Gloam</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2011/04/21/flash-fiction-challenge-strangers-in-the-gloam/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2011/04/21/flash-fiction-challenge-strangers-in-the-gloam/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Apr 2011 00:42:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Writing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chuck wendig]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flash fiction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[practice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[silly]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[writing exercises]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2667</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Chuck Wendig over at http://www.terribleminds.com issues Flash Fiction Challenges, where the goal is to take a series of words or phrases and create a short story under 1000 words using the words and/or the ideas expressed by the words. This week the words were: Figure, Dusk, Flirt, Mobile Phone, and Wig. Given those parameters, I [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Chuck Wendig over at <a rel="me nofollow" href="http://www.terribleminds.com/" target="_blank">http://www.terribleminds.com</a> issues Flash Fiction Challenges, where the goal is to take a series of words or phrases and create a short story under 1000 words using the words and/or the ideas expressed by the words. This week the words were: Figure, Dusk, Flirt, Mobile Phone, and Wig. Given those parameters, I present:</p>
<h2>Strangers in the Gloam</h2>
<p>“Hey handsome,” the voice floated out of the gloaming from behind him, “got a light?”  He turned, the voluptuous curves of her figure almost hidden by the chiaroscuro.</p>
<p>Bryce patted his pockets, then shrugged. “Sorry,” he said “I quit.”</p>
<p>“It&#8217;s a disgusting habit.” the woman said, throwing her unlit cigarette in the gutter as she prowled toward him. Primal and predatory, she moved through the checkerboard of light and shadow. Her hair was long and red, and her dress clung to her as she moved.</p>
<p>“It was just an excuse to say hello, really.” the woman said as she stepped close to him. “What was?” Bryce muttered as the woman reached up to stroke his face, her crimson talons flashing like a school of piranha in his peripheral vision. “It doesn&#8217;t matter, ” she said, running her fingernails down his chest. “follow me.”</p>
<p>Bryce followed her down the block to a discrete pair of doors.  She waved at the desk clerk in passing as she led Bryce down the dim corridors of a once stately hotel.  Like the woman herself, the hotel was past her prime, but it was obvious that she had once been a queen. The art deco embellishments gleamed in the flickering electric candlelight and the burnished wooden doors shone with centuries of secrets.</p>
<p>The woman hesitated before a door, glancing almost nervously back at Bryce, before ushering him in. The room they entered was darkening quickly as dusk turned to night. She motioned for him to sit in an overstuffed chair overlooking the city.  She stood in front of him, and slowly slid her dress from her shoulders, the silky material whispering down, catching on her nipples briefly before swirling around her feet, an onyx seashell for an olive skinned Venus.</p>
<p>She knelt down at Bryce&#8217;s feet, reaching for his belt buckle as her long red hair swept across his thighs. He closed his eyes as warmth engulfed him, riding waves of pleasure cresting into a crescendo&#8230;when the journey was interrupted by a soft, but insistent buzzing. He opened his eyes to see Venus glancing at the screen of her phone.</p>
<p>She released him with a sound like a champagne cork moving at high velocity as she rolled her eyes and answered the phone. “Hello. What? But you weren&#8217;t due here until tomorrow. No, no, of course we miss the children&#8230;absolutely&#8230;.can&#8217;t wait to see you!”</p>
<p>“Goddammit!” Venus exclaimed as she stood up and pulled the long red wig off. “Put your pants on, Bryce,&#8221; she sighed, &#8220;the kids will be home in 10 minutes.”</p>
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		<title>An open letter to the city council of Rowlett</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2011/04/21/an-open-letter-to-the-city-council-of-rowlett/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2011/04/21/an-open-letter-to-the-city-council-of-rowlett/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Apr 2011 14:58:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Babble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[john harper]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[local politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rowlett]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tea party politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teahadists]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2651</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[So, the Mayor of Rowlett, John Harper, just resigned under fire from damn near everybody.  He resigned because he said the citizens were just too stupid to let him &#8220;govern&#8221; them.  It&#8217;s just a final example of the level of arrogance and &#8220;action before thought&#8221;  Mr. Harper brought to city council meetings.
But, Ol&#8217; John wasn&#8217;t [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>So, the Mayor of Rowlett, John Harper, just resigned under fire from damn near everybody.  He resigned because he said the citizens were just too stupid to let him &#8220;govern&#8221; them.  It&#8217;s just a final example of the level of arrogance and &#8220;action before thought&#8221;  Mr. Harper brought to city council meetings.</p>
<p>But, Ol&#8217; John wasn&#8217;t alone in driving Rowlett to ruin. The city council has been implicitly responsible for the position in which the town now finds itself.  And if the city council and management follow the path that has been tread for the last 10 years, it&#8217;s only going to get worse.</p>
<p>Back when Rowlett was going through a boom, the city chose to give tax abatement to builders and retailers. Tax abatements with contracts that are STILL in effect in many cases. At the same time that the city was refusing to collect taxes from builders, Walmart, and Target, it raised the property taxes of homeowners. Raised it to the point where, when measured by square foot, Rowlett had the 3rd highest tax rate in the state.</p>
<p>And what did we get for all those property tax increases?</p>
<ul>
<li>Budget cuts.</li>
<li>Fired Librarians.</li>
<li>Layoffs.</li>
<li>Infrastructure cuts.</li>
</ul>
<p>All so Walmart could avoid paying taxes, a previous mayor could become the vice president of the builder with the largest tax abatement, and a previous city manager who cut and run as soon as his tea party birds came home to roost.</p>
<p>So, while I agree with many citizens that Mayor Harper thought of himself in the Royal “We”, and tended to believe that Mayors are supposed to “govern”, (an idea contrary to both law and common sense), what really got us into this mess was a more than decade long campaign to cut the taxes of massive corporations at the expense of the citizens in our community.</p>
<p>This is Tea Party Politics in action.  When you give tax breaks to the wealthiest people and corporations, the citizens get the burden of the infrastructure. And if they can&#8217;t bear the cost of the infrastructure, the infrastructure starts falling down.</p>
<p>Taxes are the price of democratic republic.  All members of the republic should pay their fair share. Even the really rich members. The burden of democracy cannot be placed solely on the backs of those who work for a living.</p>
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		<title>Packing up is hard to do…</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2010/09/22/packing-up-is-hard-to-do/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2010/09/22/packing-up-is-hard-to-do/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 22 Sep 2010 15:11:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Babble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[moving]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[packing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2646</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s easy, when one stays in one place for a long time, to not notice how much one accumulates.  In other words, I have way too much shit.  I&#8217;m finding things I didn&#8217;t even know I had, things I&#8217;d forgotten about, things that defy description, and some things that I just have to marvel at, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It&#8217;s easy, when one stays in one place for a long time, to not notice how much one accumulates.  In other words, I have way too much shit.  I&#8217;m finding things I didn&#8217;t even know I had, things I&#8217;d forgotten about, things that defy description, and some things that I just have to marvel at, because it&#8217;s like finding toys from a lost civilization.</p>
<p>Also, I think there is the great possibility that I was really, really, REALLY high for a long time. It&#8217;s the only thing that can explain the Jay and Silent Bob dolls&#8230;er, action figures.  Complete with bong, dog, beer, and various other accoutrement. Also, ren faire costumes, fairy wings, bat tiaras, coffins and skulls and more goth crap than I should admit to in public. 12-hole, steel toe doc martins, a cutting of long blue hair, stick-on bindis, a shirt held together by safety pins and signed by one of my favorite naked bands, and a hospital bill from a mosh pit gone terribly, terribly wrong. Concert posters taken from walls all over the world.  Giant sheets of newsprint that I put on on walls for other people to decorate and write on.  Pounds and pounds of art supplies, with an equal amount of started and never completed art projects. And comic books. Dear god, I have comic books. So many comic books. And games.  Steve Jackson paper games, D&amp;D 1st edition books, 3 ring binders full of campaigns and characters and worlds and storylines. Boxes and boxes and boxes of software&#8230;and subsequently systems that will run some of this ancient code. Apple Plus, anyone?</p>
<p>Apparently, not only was I high&#8230;I am now, and have always been, a geek.</p>
<p>And as I face this mountain of collected effluvia, I&#8217;m just not sure what to do with any of it.  Part of me just can&#8217;t bear the thought of throwing any of it away, or selling it, or burning it in a sacrifice to the gods and guardians that kept me alive during some of the more stupid periods, but I realize that I&#8217;m not likely to ever frame and put up the band flyers from 25 years ago, or break out the goth gear for anything but halloween costumes, and what in the name of all that is right in the world, am I going to do with a collection of tattooed brothel-house Barbies?</p>
<p>Packing the books and the china and the media collections was the easy part.  Now I&#8217;m down to the stuff I haven&#8217;t seen since I looked at it the last time I moved, a decade ago.  Some of this stuff has been moved 5 or 6 times, and has never come out of the original box from 20+ years ago.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s like I&#8217;m afraid that if I get rid of the Thing that reminds of of the Memory, that somehow I will also lose the Memory.  Having watched what Alzheimer&#8217;s can do, I&#8217;m terrified of somehow losing connection to the fragile thread that ties me to my past and my memories.</p>
<p>I know that&#8217;s just completely illogical. And really, when I&#8217;m trying to remember my ill begotten, misspent youth, the odds are I&#8217;m not going to need a club-date poster from Sham 69 to do it.  I&#8217;m pretty sure that&#8217;s what flashbacks are for.</p>
<p>Wish me luck, I go bravely forth to battle the demons of my past, the fears of my future, and the shame of the unfortunate wardrobe choices I&#8217;ve made through the years.</p>
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		<title>The unbearable lightness of forgiving</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2010/09/15/the-unbearable-lightness-of-forgiving/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2010/09/15/the-unbearable-lightness-of-forgiving/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 Sep 2010 19:03:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Babble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[moving]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2641</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;m packing to move.  This means that I finally have to deal with some of the stuff that up to this point I&#8217;ve been able to put aside to &#8220;deal with tomorrow&#8221;.  It&#8217;s a Scarlett O&#8217;Hara thing I do.
But, there comes a point where you just can&#8217;t keep toting around boxes for decades, refusing to [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m packing to move.  This means that I finally have to deal with some of the stuff that up to this point I&#8217;ve been able to put aside to &#8220;deal with tomorrow&#8221;.  It&#8217;s a Scarlett O&#8217;Hara thing I do.</p>
<p>But, there comes a point where you just can&#8217;t keep toting around boxes for decades, refusing to open them in case you find something icky from your past.  So, today, I put on the big-girl pants and started going through the landmine boxes.</p>
<p>And while I did find stuff that made me cry&#8230;letters from friends who have died, announcements from friends I&#8217;ve lost touch with, pictures of people who I can no longer name, I also think I found redemption, and peace, and forgiveness. None of which are things one generally finds in a box.</p>
<p>I think today was the day when I could finally put the past behind me.  I found a picture that reminded me why I was once in love with him. And a picture that reminds me why I still miss her, almost 20 years later.  And pictures of us all on the beach, and in the jungles, and atop the ruins. And I could read the love letters and realize that broken hearts heal, that not all love is eternal, and that we can choose to remember the happy times, and forgive the bad ones.</p>
<p>I saw Montana through the eyes of a woman who loved it. I saw Scotland through the eyes of a friend who chose to end his life there. I saw myself through the eyes of a man who loved me then.  I saw him though the lens of the girl I once was. I found old friends, and forgave old enemies. I cried. I laughed. I saved a memento of each. And  then I lightened my load by getting rid of the rest.</p>
<p>As I fed each thing into the shredder, I lived the moment that created it.  And then I let it go.</p>
<p>I feel disconnected, as though I&#8217;ve untied a huge part of my reality, but I also feel better. I&#8217;ve had my bonfire, and I feel lighter.  I can look back now, not in anger, but in wonderment. I don&#8217;t know that I can be forgiven for some of the things I&#8217;ve done in my life&#8230;but I feel like I took a day to forgive anyone that I&#8217;d assigned as a shadow in my heart, and I feel good about it.</p>
<p>Disconnected. Discombobulated. But relieved, and happy, and moving forward.</p>
<p>All that said; I still think it&#8217;s a bit insane that I&#8217;ve got a giant box full of rocks, which I&#8217;ve apparently moved more than once.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ll think about that tomorrow.</p>
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		<title>I’d a gotten away with it too…</title>
		<link>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2010/08/24/id-a-gotten-away-with-it-too/</link>
		<comments>http://www.spiderfarmer.com/2010/08/24/id-a-gotten-away-with-it-too/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Aug 2010 03:06:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>SpiderFarmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.spiderfarmer.com/?p=2636</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[So, the husband captured the funniest thing leaving our neighborhood and getting on I30 this morning.  Rumor has it that there was a scooby snax heist at the local grocers.  Suspects are considered stoned and shaggy.



]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>So, the husband captured the funniest thing leaving our neighborhood and getting on I30 this morning.  Rumor has it that there was a scooby snax heist at the local grocers.  Suspects are considered stoned and shaggy.</p>
<p><a title="scooby1 by SpiderFarmer, on Flickr" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/spiderfarmer/4924907625/"><img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4099/4924907625_0c37215e17.jpg" alt="scooby1" width="500" height="299" /></a></p>
<p><a title="scooby2 by SpiderFarmer, on Flickr" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/spiderfarmer/4924908379/"><img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4135/4924908379_9aa8a14b0b.jpg" alt="scooby2" width="500" height="299" /></a></p>
<p><a title="scooby3 by SpiderFarmer, on Flickr" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/spiderfarmer/4924909005/"><img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4115/4924909005_87140885cc.jpg" alt="scooby3" width="500" height="299" /></a></p>
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