Feedback on our strengths is an even greater enabler.  It helps us leverage and maximize our strengths for even greater results.

“One key to successful leadership is continuous personal change. Personal change is a reflection of our inner growth and empowerment.”
- Robert E. Quinn

Joseph Folkman addresses 35 principles for turning feedback into personal and professional change in his very easy to read and highly recommended book “The power of feedback.” 

Here is a random list of 12 from his 35 principles:

1) If you receive feedback but do not change for the better, you will be perceived more negatively than if you had not received the feedback.
2) Balancing your normal but counterproductive reactions to feedback is essential in effectively dealing with feedback.
3) The process of change begins with accepting the feedback given.
4) To change the impression another person has of you, you must change your behavior.
5) The most critical skill in making change based on feedback is deciding what specific issue to work on first.
6) We tend to perceive the reasons for our failure as having to do with the situation, but we see failure in others as having to do with their effort, ability, knowledge or character.
7) One way of improving a skill is to improve your performance in companion skills.
8) Doing something well has a dramatic impact on perceived effectiveness.
9) A critical step in personal change is to change the strategies, structures and systems that support or reinforce the behavior you desire to change.
10) Close observation of others who have demonstrated skills will help you develop the same skills.
11) Rewarding successive approximations of a desired new behavior increases the likelihood of acquiring the new behavior.
12) You can only make significant life changes if you have the necessary desire, strength, and motivation to cause those changes to happen.

3 questions for your reflection:

As you look ahead at your leadership development this year:

1) What skill (or two), if you performed with a high level of expertise, would have the biggest impact in your leadership journey?

2) What skill (or two), if you performed with a high level of expertise, would have the biggest impact in your current role?

3) What skill or quality  if you demonstrated with a high level of expertise and care, would have the biggest impact on your family life?

Companion skills

Keep in mind the following eight companion skills that the author and his colleague Jack Zenger found in their research on people who were most effective at making change:

 Passion and willingness to make a difference
 Accepts feedback
Trust
Shows concern and consideration for others
Innovation
Develops others
Optimism
Establishes clear goals and priorities

Which of these companion skills could you embrace further?

“Change is hard because people overestimate the value of what they have—and underestimate the value of what they may gain by giving that up.”
- James Belasco and Ralph Stayer 

Jasbindar Singh is a coaching psychologist working with business leaders to be even more effective. Clients value her sensitive and confidential approach to eliciting qualitative 180 and 360 degree feedback which has helped them change for the better!

reflection

Taking time to reflect helps give perspective and make greater sense of events and experiences.  The reflective process inquires, poses questions, gets insights, sees things anew and it builds.  It helps us get to know ourselves and others in a deeper way and is  a healthy and necessary activity for executives and non-executives alike.  As a business leader, if  you are too entrenched in the detail, it is likely that you are not making time for reflection and therefore missing out on the bigger picture of your business and life. 

Taking a reflective stance in your leadership can include questions like: 

• What is really going on here or what just happened?
• What are we trying to create or build here?
• What are the outcomes we are after?
• What is going well?
•  What can we do differently?
• What is the best way of proceeding given our vision?
• How am I really feeling about what just happened?
• What is the unspoken here?
• How can I deal with this differently next time?

Reflection is also a key part in the learning process.  We learn more when we reflect on what we have just experienced.  It deepens our understanding and wisdom and it helps inform the future. 

In relationships be it our loved ones or work peers and or direct reports, it’s easy to miss out vital cues of what the other person maybe communicating when we become too immersed in the transactional “doing” mode only. 

 The process of reflection helps calibrate our experiences as it separates the chaff from the wheat.  

It helps give space, perspective and directional clarity. 

The upcoming holiday period is a perfect time for reflection as our normal routines are broken.   You may naturally find yourself reflecting while gardening or enjoying the beach.  However you do it, don’t leave the precious nuggets of your life ignored and untapped.  Reflective activity is your potent gift. Utilize it to be an even wiser person, leader and family member. 

 Happy holidays!

Jasbindar Singh is a leadership coach and business psychologist helping leaders sharpen their edge – www.sqconsulting.co.nz.

Here are three questions you may wish to ponder for both your personal and professional life.

1)       What have been some key achievements this year?

2)      What has been a surprise or opportunity that came unexpectedly and how did you embrace it or what deal with it?

3)      What are you intending to grow, build and develop next year?

Whatever your focus, as Gandhi so aptly put it, be the change you wish to see!  We experience a greater sense of fulfillment and joy when we have energy and engagement for whatever we take on. 

I wish you and your loved ones a safe and happy festive season and a brilliant New Year!

(P.S.  Here are some further exploratory questions).

So how do we get the best out of people during the RWC – when they are likely to be distracted, fatigued, and some would rather be watching the games than be at work?

Whether you are a business owner, employee or manager and leader be mindful of the following over the next five weeks.  These issues were discussed at a recent HRINZ (Human Resources Institute New Zealand) leadership SIG meeting in Auckland, attended by over 40 managers and Human Resources professionals from a diverse range of industries and where Coca Cola Amatil – a major RWC sponsor – shared strategies for encouraging employee engagement at work.

Business as Unusal – the workplace is likely to be and feel different and adjustments will have to be made so manage your expectations accordingly.  Managing people’s leaves, sick days and or extra staff may be needed.

Logistics – Notice what’s working and what’s not and make adjustments accordingly. Is your workforce and business planning requirements accurate as the weeks pan out?  Do you need specialist resources?  Has the work dipped and can you afford to allow more people to take annual leave?

Flexibility – Plan for all the things you can anticipate and be proactive with. However, what often gets us is the unexpected.  By having mental and emotional agility you will be able to deal with whatever comes your way.

Fairness – Whatever actions you take – ensure that it is not only fair but it’s perceived as being fair.  There is life beyond the RWC and what you do now helps building the emotional bank account.

Communication – Consistent and regular communication is necessary to keep people engaged and focused on the right things.
Whatever else you do, have a game plan and play off the mantra of communication, flexibility, and fairness and you will score well with your customers and people alike.

Social Media – How can you use social media to good end – for example, the latest information on crowd build and traffic congestion.  What is your policy on social media? Does this change during the RWC and do people know about this?

Teamwork – The RWC offers a very practical and motivational opportunity for building a sense of team camaraderie and fostering greater team work, attitude and behaviors.  You could initiate a regular discussion on how your team compares and or contrasts with the key team behaviors that the All Blacks and other winning teams will be demonstrating. For example, some key questions to discuss with your team could focus on the following:

Game plan – what is our game plan and how are we tracking?
Strategy – Is our strategy still working or do we need to change something?
Strengths based – are we drawing on everyone’s strengths and is everyone playing to it? Are we conscious of other peoples’ strengths and weaknesses as well as our own? 
Collaboration – How well are we collaborating with other team members for the overall success and win?
Team roles – have we go the right people in the team doing the things they do best and are they able to rely on others to do the same?
Team Captain – Are we respectful of our team leader and show them support?
Listening and acknowledging - Are we good at listening to each other, receiving as well as giving feedback and acknowledging others?  Are we able to have those courageous conversations? 
Values – How do I live the stated values of this team?  If someone was observing me, would they be able to tell fairly quickly whether I was living the values and or “walking the talk?”
Fun and passion – How are we creating a sense of passion, fun and commitment on an ongoing basis?
Responsibility and accountability – Do I play above the line and take responsibility for my actions including mistakes? Do I take ownership and deliver on what I am accountable for?  Am I able to hold others to account?
Post match analysis – As a team, how well are we able to monitor and review our performance? Do we engage in regular dialogue and conversations that help the team become more match-fit and grow on all levels – physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually?
Underutilized strengths – in your day to day role, you may have some strength that you have a talent for or are motivated by. For example, you may be good at organizing events and creating a spirit of celebration. This could be an ideal time to demonstrate those skills and open up opportunities in the future.

Diversity – be mindful that everyone is not into Rugby and while they may join in the spirit of things or be so over it – let that be an okay part of your culture as well. Model tolerance with the message that differences are okay as after all, diversity creates enrichment and “one size fits all” is not what leads to creativity and innovation.

When healthy rivalry crosses the line – healthy rivalry can be fun and energizing but sometimes things can turn serious.  If this happens do acknowledge it and remind people what is acceptable and what the rules and consequences are.

There may well be a temporary dip in energy and engagement after the games.  Get input and feedback from team members and continue to build on some of the more successful initiatives beyond the games.    In the meantime, let’s cheer for the All Blacks and let’s hope that on October 23, New Zealand is awash with a buzz and there is a proud Kiwi in every corner of the globe. 

An edited version of this article is also in the NZ Herald. 
Photo source – The RWC site

Jasbindar works with organisations and coaches senior leadership teams to increase leadership effectiveness  and team engagement.

But what happens when the brand does something the consumers don’t like – as has been the case of the All Black Jersey and their Corporate Supporter – Adidas. 

All Blacks are part of the Kiwi cultural DNA and therefore our core identity. And fans have been hugely upset by the fact that the All Blacks rugby jersey cost almost twice as much in NZ when much cheaper jerseys can be purchased off shore.  And then to add salt to the wound, NZ got removed from some of the sites so Kiwi fans couldn’t even do this! 

When fans start to feel taken for granted, “ripped off”, forgotten or disadvantaged in some way, then brand integrity is at stake big time and brand reputation comes under challenge.

With the Rugby World Cup just a few weeks away  – it‘s a real shame that a time when Adidas could have harnessed all the energy, positivity and good will of the people of New Zealand, they have gotten  themselves so much on the wrong side of the pitch.

But it still isn’t too late – ultimately brands are driven by people and as human beings we do “stuff up” from time to time.  The point is how quickly we are able to put things right.

The situation can still be recovered and turned around from being a permanent blight for Adidas or a bad aftertaste for the fans.  It can also be saved then from the  embarrassing history annuls of how not to do PR including   alienating  your fans and consumer base  at such a crtical time.

 The Adidas executives need to address the critical missing piece they seem to have consciously or unconsciously been blindsided by.These are the skills and competencies of emotional intelligence (EQ or EI).

You see no matter how logical, rational and cost effective – plausible or implausible – their arguments are, they are still operating at the level of the head.  For fans on the other hand, this has become an emotional issue.   Adidas executives need to draw on Einstein’s wisdom here – “The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.”

So dear Adidas executives, listen up.   Firstly, it’s never too late to say sorry, change your strategy and say okay – we stuffed up this time BUT here is what we are going to do to put it right with the fans.    Simply fronting up on TV to argue your entrenched case is not going to do it.  

On the other hand, putting it right for the Kiwi fans and showing some nobility of heart and spirit will see you right.  Yes – you may lose some money as will some of the retailers but what you will gain will far outweigh this in the annuls of time.  And Kiwis – you will find are forgiving and generous of heart and spirit when they have been heard and the right action has been honoured.

Jasbindar Singh is a leadership coach and an EQ /SQ specialist – www.sqconsulting.co.nz. You can also find her article on this topic in  Management magazine  ( March, 2011) which also has other fantastic coverage on leadership.

Photo source: Natasha Martin, Timaru Herald (thumbnail only)

So what made this such a great experience?   Here are 7 things that we valued:

1. Meet,  greet and welcome

Soon after we walked in, we were met by a friendly young man who acknowledged us and inquired what we were looking for.   We were then guided to the specialist in the area.  Basic as this “meet and greet” is, I hate to recall the number of times I have walked into a retail shop and despite being the only customer have not been acknowledged.

2. Asked open questions, listened and then guided

The specialist salesperson then inquired further as to my exact needs and what I was looking for in a car.  He then not only showed me what I had wanted but proceeded to make a further recommendation about what could possibly serve me even better.  As it turned out, his recommendation was on the mark.

3. Enabling not obstructing

The entire interaction felt straight and informative – our questions were heard and answered.  We did not feel like we were being talked into a sales pitch, or that there was hedging or any sense of “gilding the lily.”  Quite apart from the fact that the product probably sells itself to some degree.   Regardless,   every step of the way, the exchange inspired confidence and felt comfortable.

4.  The surprise and delight factors

It was lunch time and all the car shopping had left us hungry.  Before we went off to grab a bite, we had taken a red car for a test drive.  I had remarked – in passing – that I liked the colour black.  Well – upon our return there was this stunning black machine with silver streaks, mag wheels and all which had been organized while we were at lunch.     And there were others to follow.

5. Relationship not a transaction

The entire exchange had a feeling of a developing relationship rather than one sales transaction.  There was a pathway forward.  As a new customer, I felt my car needs such as regular servicing and maintenance were taken care of and given the great service, why would I choose not to do business with them again?

6. Consistency of service

The service provided was consistent each time, every time.  Too often with other big purchases, things have started off well but after the initial sale; there is a distinct change in attitude and service.  Every encounter and exchange here was of the same high standard.

7. Professionalism

Finally, the word underlying the entire process was professionalism and yet fun.  Thank you, Paul and Cam – you more than exceeded my customer expectations and I am thoroughly enjoying the new baby.

Jasbindar Singh is a business psychologist, leadership coach, author and speaker who loves helping her clients acheive their leadership goals.  www.sqconsulting.co.nz

 The thing to not do is  “blow up” or wish that the issue will just go away because problems rarely  “just disappear.”  They typically fester and get bigger with time.

Here are a few tips that could help:

• Get to know yourself better. How do you typically react to relationship challenges? We all have our default way of being and reacting.  People can also be either too passive or aggressive neither of which helps.  Learn to be assertive and appropriate. 

• Who do you need to have a courageous conversation with?  Think through and plan your approach. Choosing your words and timing is important.  For example, if you boss is already under pressure with an upcoming Board meeting, you may want to leave you chat with him till after.  As a very good manager used to say, “Come to me with solutions, not problems.”

• You may ask for some coaching support – internally if you company has a coaching culture or get an external coach. If the company isn’t able to offer this, you may look into your own network and find out who could me an informal mentor to you.

• Having an objective “other” to sound out can ease the stress of the burden of “carrying it all on your shoulders” as well as provide perspective, some new  insight and clarity.

• Do you know the reputation you have in your company?  Every day you are reinforcing your brand and reputation through how you conduct yourself.   Build a positive reputation based on your strengths and resourcefulness.

• Emotional intelligence (EQ or EI) skills also help navigate the soft side of business relationships. Skills such as self awareness and self-management, awareness of others and managing these relationships well. Research shows that this is even more important that IQ in one’s effectiveness in life. What is an EQ competency that could benefit you?

• Be gentle with yourself and cut yourself some slack – things may already be challenging enough without you beating yourself up further.  Save that energy and channel towards looking for solutions and or best outcomes.

Jasbindar Singh is a business psychologist, leadership coach, author and speaker who loves creating shifts in awareness for her clients.  www.sqconsulting.co.nz

Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow. Robert Kiyosaki

1) Take a pro-active stance in being your own career manager.  If you are waiting for someone else to spot your talents and capabilities, you could be waiting forever. Become your own career manager and take action.

2) Do a realistic talent audit.  Identify your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats. Get feedback from those close to you at work and home about your strengths and weaknesses.  A 360-degree feedback exercise can be very helpful here. Building on your strengths,  especially ones you enjoy,  is vital but take in  areas for development as well. If 5 out of 6 people are stating that you need to pay attention to your listening skills, they can’t all be wrong and this clearly points to the need for developmental action on your part.

3) Have your own vision and goals of what you want out of this job.  Have a few goals that will happen as part of the job rather than having to do something extra. For example, “ I want to increase my network of people who may be good mentors for me in the future. I will do this by …..(action) …..developing and maintaining good relations with my manager, workmates and customers.”

4)Identify roles that appeal to you and talk to the people in these jobs to see how they match with your ‘take’ and what they really do on a day to day basis.

5) Talk to your manager and communicate your goals and desires.  Get feedback as to what skills and competencies you need to develop in your current role and which will help you towards aiming for the next role.

6) Be aware there is a fine line between communicating your career aspirations in a positive and empowering way and being ‘visible’ versus being overly pushy and aggressive.  Ginny (not real name), a Gen Y-er, had to learn this distinction.  Whilst she felt she was being underpaid, her continuing discussions with her immediate manager about pay did not help her case.  She was labelled as being unreasonable and too focused on money. 

7) Sound out your thinking and approach with trusted colleagues, friends or mentors when you have to take up a matter with your manager. It can be hard to see issues objectively when you have a lot invested in it.

Keep a perspective on your career track.  It takes time to build up experience, credibility and respect and these things do not happen overnight.  As a CEO said about his GM who I was coaching,  “He has now proved himself to get the recognition that he has been wanting so much.”

9) Be strategic in the jobs that you aim for.  Applying for jobs like spaghetti shows a lack of consideration and planning on your part.  The jobs you are likely to succeed in are those that match your knowledge, skills, interest, abilities and values.

10)  The SQ view is that an alignment of values between who you are and what really matters to you is critical in having job satisfaction and fulfilment.  If there is a values clash, no matter how many perks the job has, ultimately it will not be sustainable.

11) If you do end up applying for your ideal job and are unsuccessful the first time, try not getting dispirited for too long.  Use it as a learning opportunity and get feedback you can use next time around.

Jasbindar Singh is a coaching psychologist and author of “Get your groove back.”

If you are doing business with people from a different culture, how do you minimize misunderstanding and faux pas and maximize good will,  co-operation and success?  How do you not only survive but thrive in a culture vastly different from yours?  In such a potentially challenging context, skills involving a keen sense of observation, attunement, genuine interest and emotional intelligence (EQ) become more poignant.  Cultural intelligence is just as important as any other technical skills relevant to your job. The good news is that this  need not be a minefield of unknowns but a journey of learning, discovery and success. 

A few years ago, I worked with senior executives from a company doing business with India (and other Asian countries).  Unraveling  some of the assumptions, approaches and thinking of our executives frequently led to gales of  laughter as differences were uncovered but also some sage learning and humility that often comes from  respect and  consideration of the other.   The executives left the session feeling more resourced, able and willing to take on the challenge.

If you are an executive doing business with countries where people think, act and process things in a way which feel foreign to you, here are seven   insights, attributes  and mindset to be mindful of.

1) Be mindful of your assumptions – how you have done things back home isn’t necessarily “correct” and or indeed the only way to do things.  Different cultures have different approaches to doing business. Get to know and understand what the obvious and not so obvious rules and patterns are.

2) Don’t be judgemental – yes – this is easier said than done. However, even if you find yourself judging and evaluating  along the lines of ‘just how wrong things are the  way the host culture is approaching certain things’  keep these to yourself!  As Daniel Goleman puts it – both cultural and emotional intelligence require, “a propensity to suspend judgement – to think before acting.”   Remember your objective – you are there to build bridges and do successful business.

3) Stay flexible – research has shown that executives who remain flexible when living abroad do a whole lot better than those who stay rigid in how they approach things. Be nimble in your thinking as your mental models get stretched and sometimes stressed!  If you are living in another country, don’t just mingle with the expats. Get to know the locals too. Cognitive flexibility is a strong suit for any leader.

4) Have an orientation of openness and learning – see this phase of your business and leadership development as one that is going to put you on a path way possibly beyond your wildest vision of yourself.   The growth and rich experience including the unexpected learning and humility that executives experience can be like nothing else they may have experienced before.

5) Take responsibility and make an effort – people from the culture that you are doing business with really appreciate it when they see you making an effort.  Get to know their cultural etiquette, norms, habits and practices, dress code, communication patterns, business do’s and don’ts  and any religious  sensitivities.  The fact that you make an effort even if you get it wrong a bit still goes a long way in the emotional and business bank account.

6) Go beyond language – just because the people you are doing business with people can speak English, doesn’t mean that you therefore understand their culture. Go beyond the language to really notice, understand and get to know the values, beliefs,  the core drivers, stories and cultural practices that really matter to your new business partners.  Focus on the non-verbal as much as or more than just words.  A lot of what makes up a culture is like the iceberg – massively present but not immediately visible!

7) Manage your frustrations – there will be times when things will not be moving at the speed you wish them to or you experience a mis-match of expectations and even culture shock. This is normal.  The point is to accept, embrace and find a way through these feelings rather than fight, get angry or give in to it for long.  In the long term, you will come out all the richer for having had the life and business enhancing experiences.

Jasbindar Singh is a business psychologist of Indian descent who loves working with executives to bolster their cross-cultural leadership effectiveness.

The good news is that once we awaken to our blindspots, it can be our greatest opportunity for learning, growth and development. The awakening happens typically when we get given some feedback or feedforward from a colleague, manager, team member or a loved one.  However, the transformative opportunities latent in the blindspots can only be realised if we acknowledge, take responsibility, and own the feedback and take appropriate action. 

In my leadership coaching some of the greatest breakthroughs have happened when the “penny finally drops” and the lights go on.  As one GM said, “Knowing what I do now, makes what I was doing totally redundant and ineffective. It’s not rocket science, what I have to do to become a better leader.” 

So here’s the SQ perspective (wisdom) on how to become more aware of  your blindspots.  

1) Build your levels of self-awareness.  The more self-awareness you have, the faster you will be able to respond in making adjustments and changes regarding your leadership effectiveness.  Start noticing what you tend to do automatically e.g. do you find that you are always doing the talking in a meeting (not listening or facilitating) or do people go quiet around you?

2) Note and catch yourself the next time you are given feedback and you find yourself being defensive, arguing or explaining away why you think the feedback isn’t true. Notice especially any visceral reactions that you are having.  Your body doesn’t lie and these reactions can point to some level of recognition you may not currently be conscious of.

3) STOP.  Instead of closing off imagine (and try on) that this feedback, is in fact, true. Ask yourself, “so then what?”

4) Continue to stay open to this new perspective and respond accordingly. Assuming that it’s true how is this going to change your current reality?  So what are you going to do differently?

5) As you try on a new or different behaviour, action, belief, monitor how those around you are responding.  You may also wish to share the above with a trusted colleague and get their feedback as to your progress.

6) Reward yourself for having stepped up in your leadership path.

Jasbindar Singh is a business psychologist, leadership coach, author and speaker who loves creating shifts in awareness for her clients.  www.sqconsulting.co.nz