Baby boy was cranky, crying at my legs and demanding my attention. I thought about locking myself in the bathroom and never coming out. He is so very two sometimes and it makes me a little crazy. The mess of the move isn’t helping.

But I came up with an alternative. We donned our jackets, just the two of us, and I told him we were taking a walk. Then I let him lead me through the neighborhood. As soon as we stepped out the front door, he was calm and happy. I asked him where he wanted to go and his chubby little hand grasped my finger as he pointed the direction he wished to go.

We discussed airplanes “up high” and sniffed flowers. We stepped on all the manhole covers and splashed in puddles. I watched the delight on my boys face when he saw a dog and we discussed the fact that ducks could fly and say “quack”. He shoved his face in every flower, no matter how low to the ground and declared, “Mmmmmm.” I giggled when he stooped so low and smashed his face into those wet flowers that were merely ground cover.

We walked a while through the neighborhood and I asked, “Are you ready to go home?” which was met with a vehement, “NO!” We forged on. We talked about holding hands to cross the street and how there were “more cars” everywhere. We counted birds in the sky and chased a few before they took flight. My boy would alternately hold on tight to my finger, then run free when something delighted him. When we finally approached our house again, he told me “NO! No go home!” But it was getting dark and I was getting cold.

In that moment I looked at my little man and saw my oldest son who now towers above me, remembering similar walks he and I once shared. I thanked heaven for the amazing discovery walk I just shared with my little man and I squeezed his hand a little harder.

He looked at me and again declared, “No go home” so I bribed him with his favorite show and his favorite Pj’s. We went inside hand-in-hand a little calmer and a lot happier.

I’ve been a touch absent lately. I haven’t been reading blogs or commenting. I have been absent-minded and forgetful. I have had a lot on my mind.

You see, we are moving.

My brain has been filled with all things moving and there has been no space for much of anything else. I hate neglecting my blog and my writing projects so much. I miss my blog friends, but there is only so much one person can do. And if I have learned anything from all my time online it is that the great World Wide Web will still be there waiting for me when I return.

But for now, I must pack. And sort. And clean out. And go dumpster diving for boxes because I REFUSE to pay for a box. And I must transfer school records and find homes for our kitties. I must say good-bye to the neighborhood that we have lived in for the past 7 1/2 years. I must continue to convince myself and my children that we are NOT moving to Africa and will still see our friends from time to time.

But I know that it will be less. We will lose touch with people not in our daily lives. And life will go on.

Oh, and just in case you haven’t heard me yelling this from the rooftop, I HATE moving.

But I do love cleaning out. It’s refreshing to rid my life of unnecessary items. It is freeing to discard things simply because I don’t want to move them to a new house.

I haven’t participated in the lovely Stasha’s Listicles in quite some time as a result of having the move on my brain. And even today, I List off-topic. Please forgive me and my absence. I shall return heart and soul in a few weeks when I have managed to pack up and unpack my life.

Today, I give you 10 4ish Moving Tips:

1. Pack all non-essentials several weeks before moving. It is truly amazing how many things you don’t use daily.

2. Stop fretting over the mess your house becomes as you clean out and move. The second best excuse for not cleaning is, “We are moving.” First best excuse? “I just had a baby.”

3. Free yourself from stuff. Seriously. It’s amazing how much crap we accumulate Just In Case.

4. Pare down the kid’s keepsakes. If you can, take pictures. They are easier to keep and easier to organize.

5. Don’t do it.

Oops. Did I say that? Yeah. I did. And see, this is where my brain power ends. I came up with 4 legitimate tips. That’s pretty good considering all of the things I have been forgetting lately! Happy Monday! And if you don’t see me around, at least you’ll know I am not a neglectful blogger!

Mother’s Day is upon us. Whether you dread it, or look forward to it, it is almost here.

According to the Mother’s Day Index for 2013, a mother’s value has declined again for the third straight year. The question was posed, “What is a Mother worth?”

“Priceless”, many declare.

“All I need in payment is love from my children,” another says.

Yet, we live in a society in which many of these same women will feel less valued because they do not draw an income for their hard work. Despite seeing the value in being home or spending time with their children, their monetary value makes them feel less.

I, in all honesty, am sometimes one of those women.

And then there’s the matter of job title. Which jobs do you include when calculating the monetary worth of a mother? The list on the site includes such jobs as cooking, driving, helping with homework, family finances and shopping for the family, to name a few. And, if you really want to break it down, you have to calculate how much time is spent in each of those jobs, thus calculating an hourly rate.

We Moms are currently worth $59,862.30.

The purpose for calculating this mathematically is to plan for the unfortunate event of the death of a mother and provide the family with enough life insurance to cover all of the jobs The Mom does. A price. A hard, logical price. In dollars and cents.

I haven’t seen whether or not you should multiply this price per child. If that were the case, which I suspect it’s not, I would be worth $419,036.10 per year. Nearly half a million dollars per year at the going rate.

I would be a freakin’ millionaire in short order. Only I’m not. And according to many, parenting is a privilege, one we shouldn’t put a price on at all. Ever.

But we also love to calculate how much it costs to raise a child, putting monetary value on our children. Shouldn’t that be priceless as well?

So what is the worth of a mother? I sit staring at my cursor trying to determine the worth of something that is all encompassing. I could trivialize my job and list all of the things I do in a day. I could tell you about when I was sick last year and my family declared that it took three of them to do a job I do on my own daily. I could tell you that Motherhood is priceless, which is merely a way of saying that there is no possible way to pin down a price.

But I would like to put it to you this way:

According to Dictionary.com, the word Great has 16 definitions if used as an adjective, 3 definitions if used as a noun, 2 when used as an interjection and 1 when used as an idiom.

My favorite definitions include; important, highly significant, consequential, of noble or lofty character, and my favorite, of extraordinary powers.

The Worth of a Mom IS GREAT. It is so great that society tries to minimize our importance, saying it is a job anyone could do. It is so great that no one could really ever replace us no matter how hard they tried. The worth of a Mom is so great that despite the enormity of it, women take on the challenge again and again.

As the monetary value decreases again this year, the true Worth of Mothers remains the same and always will. The Worth of a Mom is great.

Dear Baby Boy,

Two years ago today, your chubby little face slid into this world a mere 30 minutes after our arrival at the hospital. You came out screaming and haven’t really stopped since.

Last night as I tucked you in, we sang songs, situated blankets and blew each other kisses. We bid farewell to all things one-year-old and I kissed my last one-year-old face. You proved today that you are more than ready to be two as you refused to eat dinner even in the face of cake and presents.

But the cake eventually won and so we celebrated.

Today we celebrate growing up and becoming independent. I love it when you wrap your baby arms around me and kiss me. I love it when you tell me you love me. I love to watch your chubby legs try to keep up with where you so desperately want to go.

I love that you still need me sometimes, however it would be nice if you could coordinate those times opposite dinner and any cleaning I might need to do.

I love your total and complete boy-ness. After three little girls in a row, your growling dinosaur noises and car sounds are welcome. Your desire to tackle your sister and wrestle, well, we are working on that.

Today, little man, you go from baby to toddler in one fell-swoop. You have been working on that transition for quite some time and although I saw it coming, it has still taken me by surprise. I will still call you my baby man, probably forever, so you may as well get used to it.

Each day, your words come more clearly, your expressive nature finding a voice. Your torso lengthens and your baby chub is slipping away. I watch you grow with joy and sorrow all at once, knowing this is the beginning of the end.

The end of infants. The end of cribs and late night wakings. The end of hauling around a baby. The end of being needed for everything all the time.

But it is also the beginning. The beginning of adventures and experience. The beginning of life. The beginning of discovery.

With that, I wish you the very best Happy Birthday a Mom knows how to wish.

Happy birthday Baby Man. Mama loves you.

Love,
Mom

I will be the first to admit that I am a mean Mom. I am. I expect certain things and my children will have consequences for their actions.

I am the Mom who, upon discovery of a mouthy child to a Sunday School teacher, required him to call and apologize to that teacher.

I am the Mom who refuses to give my kid’s friends access to the wifi.

I am the Mom who will kick teenage boys bigger than me out of my van and tell them they will walk home if they aren’t nice to another boy.

I am the Mom who will make my kids sit on the couch for half an hour with their arms folded when they have been particularly naughty during church.

I am the Mom who makes my kids do daily chores and if they whine, they merely get more chores.

I am the Mom whose children don’t have a cell phone because they can always borrow someone else’s.

I am the Mom who will…wait for it…spank my children if the situation dictates. And don’t you dare tell me there is never a situation that warrants a spanking.

I am the Mom who will lock my toddler in his bedroom because he is so desperate for a nap, he hurts. And if he sleeps, he will feel so much better.

I am the Mom who will make my daughter stand with a bar of soap in her mouth for two minutes for lying because when you are grown, the cops/spouse/everyoneelse won’t be so kind.

I am the Mom who will make a child wear holy pants to school because they decided not to take care of them.

I am the Mom who will pull the car over to the side of the road and make a kid sit in time out for screaming in the car.

I am my children’s biggest ally, but my job is not to be their friend. My job is not to coddle and give in to their demands simply because it is easier. My job is to teach them to become productive citizens who contribute in a positive way to the world.

And if that makes me a mean Mom, well, so be it.

If I’m being honest, sometimes I wish there were more mean Moms out there.

I decided to split this week’s list up into two parts. 30 minutes is either a very long time, or about two seconds. I will let you decide which list falls into which of those categories.

5 ways I usually spend 30 minutes
1. Wiping noses, changing diapers and drying tears

2. Making children go play

3. Telling Baby Boy to stop tackling his sisters

4. Insisting the children pick up their crap

5. Trying to do something a midst the chaos such as laundry, dishes or general cleaning

Since all mothers know that 30 minutes without their lovelies is a myth, I will share with you the things I can only dream of doing alone.

5 ways I would spend 30 minutes without kids
1. I would read my book uninterrupted

2. I would eat yummy things without sharing

3. I would pee alone

4. I would take a bath without fear of reprisal

5. I would probably waste time online or spend time writing

I discovered in the writing of this post a tragic lack of pictures recently taken. I seriously haven’t taken pictures much since Christmas. The main reason for that being that somebody moved/lost my battery charger for my camera. Awesome. But, I will prevail. My new goal is to locate the charger so that I may include awesome pictures of my lovely children in future posts. (I can almost hear you chanting, “Don’t do it.”)

Anybody want a toddler?

This week, my sister and I decided to step out of our usual banter and attempt to dispense some awesome tips on packing school lunches for your kiddos. So today, we are going to show you how to make sandwich sushi for lunch.

If you are interested in more of my lunch packing tips, you can find those here and here.

Today’s vlog was inspired by Mama Kat! Check out her pretty much world famous prompts and other awesome videos!

This week’s list is intriguing…10 Chapters in a book about me. My first thought is that it just might be a snooze-fest, but my second thought resides in how our lives go through definite phases.

The ebb and flow of life is a fascinating thing. I find myself moving rapidly into a new chapter, a chapter without newborns and diapers, a chapter full of teenagers and homework. A new chapter for sure.

Without further ado, I give to you 10 Chapters in a book about me:

Chapter 1: The early years: Roaming the prairies and death to a Barbie

Chapter 2: Teenage angst and all the boyfriends

Chapter 3: The college years: How to date a hot Hawaiian boy and all the other boys

Chapter 4: Falling in love in 11 days

Chapter 5: Newlyweds: Adventures in marriage and how not to kill the one you love

Chapter 6: All the babies

Chapter 7: Survival of the fittest or how NOT to permanently lock yourself in the bathroom

Chapter 8: Self discovery: How to be a Mom AND anything else

Chapter 9: Natural childbirth or all the things I said I would never do

Chapter 10: Moving on and how to cope with no more babies

There you have it, the quick and dirty information on me and how I managed to survive until the ripe old age of…let’s just say my children think I’m 100. Maybe it’s not a snooze-fest, but there are definitely a lot of diaper changes in those chapters for sure!

Sometimes life is overwhelming and just hard. My solution to that particular problem has always been laughter. I need it like I need sunshine–like I need caffeine–like I need to run. Today, I am over at Just.Be.Enough talking all about laughter.

And since I need to laugh as much as I need air, it seemed only appropriate to leave you with some silliness. My sister and I…we are crazy silly and have invented The Fully Dressed News. You know, the opposite of the naked news.

And we don’t deliver actual news, just news made up because of too many years spent watching children’s programming.

So have a laugh on me and have a wonderful weekend!

This week, we decided to participate in Mama Kat’s vlogging prompts again as we just couldn’t pass up the Sister Tag. My sister and I have been partners in crime for a very long time and we have a tendency to giggle…a lot.

The original video consisted of a minute and a half of giggling before we could even answer the first question.

Lucky for you there is editing.

I present to you, my sister and I in all our silliness. Oh, and watch out for the squirrel!

You know, if you happened to like our video or you know, subscribe to our channel, you wouldn’t hear us complain one bit!