Steinbrecher Group

Leading Others: 5 Ways to Help Introverts Become Confident Contributors

Susan Steinbrecher — Tue, 25 Mar 2025 12:51:21 +0000

Introverts in the workplace are often misunderstood. They can be perceived as shy, withdrawn, or even lacking empathy. The fact is, they can become exceptional team members and contributors, if leaders take the time and make the effort to understand their mindset and provide requisite support.

So how do you, as a leader, encourage your more introverted colleagues to actively engage with others and feel more comfortable doing so, particularly in group settings?

Here are some suggestions:

5 Ways to Facilitate Stronger Presence and Contribution

1. Dig deep to understand their perspective.

In a friendly one-on-one, ask the individual outright, why it might be difficult for them to voice their opinions. It could be that it’s just their nature, or there may be number of underlying, ‘fixable’ root causes including a negative dynamic with another co-worker, a lack of confidence, previous experiences being shot down when contributing ideas, and not feeling their point of view is truly heard or valued. In such instances, your intervention and support can go a long way towards a lasting solution.

2. Share the downside of staying silent.

Introverts may not realize the deeper impacts of their shyness, both explicitly and implicitly. Most critically, when they fail to voice their point of view, the team/project/issue misses an important perspective and thus, the outcome is likely to be sub-optimized. More subliminally, their silence or lack of contribution may make them appear disengaged, or, taken a step farther, that they may not value their colleagues’ time and efforts.

3. Ask specifically for their input; encourage their participation.

When in a group meeting, remember to invite these folks to the party. A shy person may find it difficult to speak over those with louder voices, or to offer a dissenting point of view. Make a point of asking them for their input with phrases such as, “What do you think?” or “Tell me more about that …” Continually encourage them to voice their opinion.

4. Provide positive feedback.

It’s important to help the introverted individual to build/maintain/strengthen their confidence and self-esteem. Saying things like, “Thank you for sharing that” or “Excellent thought” will spur them to contribute to the conversation both at that juncture and in the future. If you are in a one-on-one setting, be sure to ask their thoughts and opinions on what’s been discussed. A little pro-active coaching will go a long way.

5. Provide training and tools for development.

Strong communication skills are vital not only for yourself as a leader, but also for your colleagues – and that’s even more paramount for introverts. Present opportunities for quieter individuals to participate in presence-building programs or other courses that provide practical experience in public speaking and communication skills – and be sure they are taught in a safe learning environment.

Whether intended or unintended, leaders have tremendous power to influence the emotional states of their people. The key to helping introverts shine begins with an appreciation of their mindset and continues by ensuring they consistently have the opportunity to raise their voices and be heard. Not only will the individuals shine, but your team and organization will benefit as well.

Photo Credit: Christopher Sanders Photography

About the Author

Susan Steinbrecher is Founder and CEO of Steinbrecher Group, an established, leadership development firm that delivers sustainable success through an innovative, proven partnership model that prioritizes conscious, authentic, EQ-driven leadership. Her expertise has positively impacted companies of all sizes, across a wide range of industries worldwide, including Bank of America, BNSF Railway, Capital One, Concentra, CVS Health, Delta Airlines, Hilton Worldwide, and Starbucks Coffee Co.

Prior to coaching, Susan was a rising star with one of the country’s best-known hotel chains for 14 years, going from entry level to the chain’s youngest general manager in history to leading the company’s strategic training and development initiatives.

Susan is the author/co-author of 5 books including Meaningful Alignment: Mastering Emotionally Intelligent Interactions at Work and In Life; Kensho-A Modern Awakening- Instigating Change in an Era of Global Renewal (Amazon best seller); and Heart-Centered Leadership: An Invitation to Lead from the Inside. She is also a professional speaker, most recently delivering the keynote address for a corporate conference of over 10,000 hospitality professionals on the topic of Heart-Centered Leadership.

Leadership Success: Top 3 Challenges Leaders Struggle With Every Day

Susan Steinbrecher — Thu, 13 Feb 2025 10:15:00 +0000

Leadership at its core, has always been about people connecting with people. The more authentic the connection, the better the communication, the more mutual trust established, and the better the alignment – the more successful the leader and thus, the organization.

Over the past 30 years of coaching and working with hundreds of leaders from executives to managers, I’ve found that while leadership styles are continually evolving, the day-to-day challenges for leaders have predominantly remained the same and are centered in 3 key areas:

Top 3 Leadership Challenges

1. Poor conflict management.

Conflict is a perfectly normal, often unavoidable, and can even be a healthy means to achieve an optimal outcome. Learning HOW to effectively handle conflict is a skill central to building and maintaining all healthy relationships, and often, needs conscious practice and reinforcement. Handling conflict with skill requires leaders to have a healthy dose of emotional intelligence (EQ). Leaders must remain objective, avoid assumptions and preconceived notions, be mindful of not blaming others, demonstrate patience, and engage in active listening. Leaders can take more control of their outcomes by building their EQ reserve and learning and practicing mindful communication skills, particularly when the stakes are high.

2. Lack of team unity.

Dysfunctional teams are counterproductive. Gossip, judgement, egos, and office politics plague many organizations, filtering directly to team dynamics. Positive groupthink endeavors can diminish team conflicts that arise from any of these root causes. A critical strategy and important first step is to bring teams together to share ideas and create a cohesive environment. Team-building initiatives grounded in collaboration might include drafting a vision or mission statement, conducting trust-building activities, and brainstorming/writing a team manifesto, i.e., team operating principles. These tasks will help build trust and confidence among team members. Team leaders should also consider building their “executive presence” (maturity or polish) via coaching or other means, so they are better prepared to form, manage, and motivate cohesive, high-performing teams.

3. Unhealthy goal and/or control focus.

Many leaders are high-achievement, performance-driven individuals who tend to exert control and use results-focused language to engage people in solving problems. So how does a leader know when this becomes unhealthy? Telltale signs include:

Difficulty trusting others
Perfectionism, i.e., “only I can get it done the right way”
Unrealistic expectations
A leadership style that’s more dictatorial
Interpretation of others as being less motivated when, in fact, they may only wish to be careful, thoughtful, consensus-driven, or methodical
The inclination to ‘fix’ or take control vs. enabling others

With an unhealthy goal or control focus by leadership, people often lose motivation and don’t collaborate effectively. When this occurs, projects are more likely to fall apart and ultimately, goals may take even longer to achieve or may be missed altogether.

To understand and begin letting go, leaders should:

Recognize how much their own attitudes about control affect their situation
Become more strategic in accomplishing objectives
Divest of the minutiae of daily issues
Invest time in practices that build emotional resilience
Be patient with both themselves and others
Choose words carefully to increase alignment among the team

With raised consciousness and commitment to improving key leadership skills, combined with the right training and development, leaders can become more successful in resolving conflicts, creating cohesive teams, and leading through empowerment – which collectively, translates to a more engaged, motivated, and inspired organization.

Additional Articles

Managing Emotions: 4 EQ Skills That Will Transform How You Handle Tense Interactions. Susan Steinbrecher, Oct. 28, 2024
Building Resilience: 10 Simple Questions to Help Overcome Obstacles and Build Emotional Resilience. Susan Steinbrecher, Nov. 11, 2024

About the Author

Susan is the author/co-author of 5 books including Meaningful Alignment: Mastering Emotionally Intelligent Interactions at Work and In Life;Kensho-A Modern Awakening- Instigating Change in an Era of Global Renewal (Amazon best seller); and Heart-Centered Leadership: An Invitation to Lead from the Inside. She is also a professional speaker, most recently delivering the keynote address for a corporate conference of over 10,000 hospitality professionals on the topic of Heart-Centered Leadership.

Building Resilience: 10 Simple Questions to Help Overcome Obstacles and Build Emotional Resilience

Susan Steinbrecher — Mon, 11 Nov 2024 21:51:24 +0000

Emotional composure and resilience are essential skills for strengthening communication, resolving conflict, and building and sustaining rewarding relationships.

Emotionally resilient leaders have a tremendous, positive influence on their teams and organizations that fuel increased employee engagement, higher productivity, and a more innovative and adaptive organizational culture. And amidst today’s climate of significant change, resilient leadership becomes a driving force for overcoming challenges and steering the organization toward success.

So How Does One Build Resilience?

Emotional resilience is the ability to respond to stressful or unexpected situations and crises with mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper. And while some portion of emotional resilience may be inherited, it is a soft skill largely formed though life experiences, training, and conscious practice.

By building a healthy reserve of emotional composure and resilience through skill development, leaders can more easily and more seamlessly tap into healthy behaviors when needed.

An Exercise in Building Emotional Resilience

Reflect on a challenging situation in your work or personal life. Use the following ten questions to help you move from a sense of being overwhelmed to a sense of possibility or neutrality. Revisit this exercise often to hone emotional resilience and shift unhealthy patterns of thinking that may be holding you back.

What is the situation?
What specifically about this situation do I find so challenging or overwhelming?
How are my thoughts in this moment a reflection of fear, self-limiting beliefs, or close-mindedness?
How do I feel when I think these thoughts, i.e., do my thoughts bring stress or peace into my life?
Am I absolutely sure that my thoughts about the situation are realistic and objective?
How would I feel without these thoughts, i.e., would I feel more peaceful? Can I let these thoughts go?
What is at least one thing about the situation that is possible?
What is one step that, if taken, would move me forward?
How do I feel when I imagine myself moving forward and taking that step?
Can I take that step? Would I take that step? If so, when?

The first step in building emotional resilience, is becoming consciously aware of your thoughts and reactions in those challenging situations. The doorway to mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper will then be open. And with that equanimity, comes the foundation for powerful, emotionally intelligent (EQ) leadership.

About the Author

Managing Emotions: 4 EQ Skills That Will Transform How You Handle Tense Interactions

Susan Steinbrecher — Mon, 28 Oct 2024 16:01:25 +0000

Recent and current events continue to put a spotlight on how we interact, both personally and professionally. In these times of division, tension, and stress, emotions can run high. As individuals and as leaders, we must build our emotional intelligence capabilities to ensure the best outcomes in our daily interactions.

The starting point? Be aware of and attend to your own emotional needs, as your emotions are directly transmissible to others.

Fight or Flight – Your Choice

When strong emotions arise, there is the event or conversation that triggered the strong emotions, the stimulus, and then there is the response that follows, such as anger, frustration, anxiousness, avoidance, and sadness. What dwells between stimulus and response is choice. Ultimately, you choose the way in which you will respond.

This window of choice is often quite narrow and many times, emotions may be way ahead of thinking. The human brain is designed to be reactive in nature and the fight or flight mechanism is very strong, leading you to experience a variety of physical sensations geared to prepare you for action. The problem is this default response cannot tell the difference between being chased by a lion versus getting involved in a heated political conversation. The same chemicals are being released in your body, which is why it is essential to have a set of self-regulation tools at your disposal.

4 Emotional Self-Regulation Skills

Use these critical skills when strong emotions begin to take over. With practice, you will build a reserve of emotional resilience that can be called upon when needed.

1. Pause

Avoid responding immediately; pause first. Whether in-person, virtual, email, or text, pausing is an excellent technique for building impulse control.

2. Take deep breaths

Pay attention to your breathing. Simply focusing on your breath and slowing down your inhaling and exhaling takes you out of your head and into the body. Take long, slow, deep breaths, before moving forward with the discussion.

3. Deflect attention

It is helpful to deflect attention or energy away from yourself and on to someone or something else. This also will buy you some time to calm down. Ask questions, take notes, or redirect your gaze from the person you are speaking to, onto an object or place in the room.

4. Delay if needed – reschedule, refresh, or reset

It is not always possible to adequately manage your feelings in the moment. If necessary, consider delaying the conversation altogether. The delay could be for several minutes, hours, or even a few days. If you are in a stressful business meeting, be sure to plan for frequent breaks. And if possible, take the problem outside of a stressful environment, which may contribute to a more creative and mutually amenable outcome.

Always remember that the way you manage your emotions and moods will have a direct and significant impact on the quality of your daily interactions and ultimately, your relationships. Although each individual differs in their level of resilience, every individual can improve their emotional resilience through focused and sustained effort.

About the Author