Wikipedia describes Empathy as the capability to share and understand another’s emotions and feelings, and is characterized as the ability to “put oneself into another’s shoes”.

This connection to others is both an honorable and natural feeling, but can also often drive us to do something that, is the completely wrong thing to do. Since joining the Fire Service I’ve seen many situations where peoples empathy for another has not only caused them to be unable to render help, but on occasions has actually put everyone in danger.

In a blog post the other day Seth Godin talked about empathy and asked marketers to not assume they know how people are feeling emotionally. His logic was that unless you had had the same experience, how could you know how a person was feeling and that it was therefore dangerous to pretend you do.

I agree with this, but in a stressful, high anxiety situation, peoples imagination and emotions can run away on them if the environment is not managed and if people do not control their own state. As we grow, we develop a strong natural empathetic response. It’s that feeling that makes us want to rush over and help someone we see struggling, or aid someone in pain.

The problem is, if we get caught up in that emotion – we actually lose the ability to help.

What I’ve discovered, partly through training and partly through observation is that there is a space (a period of time) between the stimulus (what happened) and your response to it. For some people that time doesn’t seem to exist and they react so quickly, so the challenge is to take a deep breath and take as long as needed to respond appropriately.

‘Feel’ but don’t get caught up

It’s important to have empathy and show compassion, but you can’t get caught up in the emotion of the situation. You help best when you are totally present and strong.

What’s your role

Be clear, “what’s my role in this situation”, and respond appropriately. At the scene of a car accident it would be a natural instinct to want to help a crying child first and remove them from the situation and give comfort. But to remain effective we must control those feelings, and do what is right. To solve an emotional situation effectively there should be a process that works best

The same situation we see on the Fire Ground exist in normal life.

To be effective in our jobs, our businesses, and our families, we need to learn to have empathy without over reaction, this allows us to assess and then act in the most effective manner. If not the situation becomes overwhelming and we lose both our clarity of thought and the creativity required to solve the problem at hand.

Empathy can become an addiction

It feels good to be connected emotionally to people, but it is not always best to be like that. Build a strong emotional muscle to help guide your response as It’s a lot easier to assess and react to a situation by looking in ‘at it’ rather than when you are ‘too close’.

In business we’re required to make big decisions in stressful environments, think strategically under pressure and set an example for our employees. Don’t go running into any burning building without taking a minute to control your frame of mind.

Cheers, Stephen.

I’m a believer in education, I really am, and my children’s eduction is very important to me. I’ve pursued high-level tertiary education myself, and I regularly attend business and personal development courses.

But I’m also a believer in determination, passion and experience. A huge believer in fact, and sitting next to a guy in the Wool business one evening  after speaking at an Icehouse event, I was reminded of why…

His story went something like this:

He was sacked from his first job packing shelves at K-Mart when he was young. I believe he left school early as he suffered with dyslexia and to add insult to injury, as he walked from his job that day, his boss told he would never amount to anything.

That comment ignited a fire in his belly. He so badly wanted to prove the world wrong.

He now owns and runs a company in the wool industry turning over tens of millions of dollars each year.

The key to his success wasn’t some fancy education – it was something thats hard to teach – it was pure determination, passion and drive to achieve his dreams.

I truely believe some people are born with it. Born with such determination and passion that it’d be hard for them to fail – like Gary van Ner Chuk. I blogged about him a couple of days ago and posted a video in which he explains how school wasn’t really for him. His constant ‘F’ grades told him that.

But get this. During the weekends he was down at the mall earning over $2k selling base ball cards each week, and dispite what the education system said about him, he’s gone on to become famous and build a company  turning well over $60m a year.

A lot of people fail in the ’system’, but one of the things I’ve learnt over my career in is that there’s no substitute for determination and passion. Someone who’s clear about their dreams and has the drive to achieve them, will almost always outsmart someone with only an education.

I’ve also learnt as a father that I’ll only influence my children if I have their attention and respect. More important than my children’s education is that they learn to focus, to be strong in themselves, to form their own opinions and believe they can do anything. Their self esteem is precious to me.

Unfortunately those values aren’t always treasured in the education system, but I am certain it will do a lot more for you over the long term than any single university degree.

Do you agree? What are your thoughts?

I love drawing and outlining at my white board or in my note book because I connect emotionally with my thoughts so much more powerfully and with more clarity than if I use my computer alone.

In this video Milton Glaser talks about drawing while he is drawing, and makes an observation of art schools where drawing has been removed from the curriculum to allow time to learn software. It seems increasingly that students now have the creative tools, but not the emotional connection with their craft.

MILTON GLASER DRAWS & LECTURES from C. Coy on Vimeo.

‘How did you become so wealthy?’ is a question I’ve asked plenty of people in my life. But the answer I got from a very successful colleague of mine when I worked at Xerox wasn’t about a product, or a service, or a sales  or marketing strategy. It was about a belief that underpinned everything he did.

His answer was this. “I got rich by making other people rich… I add value to peoples lives.”

He took it upon himself every day, to go out and add value to peoples lives – whether it was his clients’, or his customers’ or his friends’.

Now you’re not necessarily going make people rich simply by adding value to them, but by believing you can add value in a way specific to your industry, the wealth in whatever form it may be, will follow.

Let me use Queensberry as an example. We add value to our customers by doing three things:

1) Helping our clients make more money – by differentiation
2) Saving our clients time – by offering to do their post-production work or providing tools so they can do things more easily
3) Giving our clients with a better experience than anyone else

If our clients don’t feel like we deliver on at least one of those areas – we may as well not exist and we wouldn’t be flourishing if you didn’t add value to your customer’s lives in some way.

You need to express your care in a way people will value

I wrote a while ago about how I demonstrate my love for my wife Sonya by turning her light off for her each night. I do this because I know that she likes me doing it. The same principle applies in business. It’s our job to understand how our clients like to be loved and what makes them tick. Then we can go the extra mile and add value in a way they didn’t even know we could.

At Queensberry, we know it’s simply not enough to just add value to our clients’ (Photographers) lives as they are not the end user. Their Brides and Grooms are the ones turning the pages of our albums, cherishing the memories and emotionally connecting with the story they tell.

It’s our goal to add value to them also by providing a treasure that they can remember their day by and hand down through the generations.

If we do it right, we might even provide Brides and Groom’s with an experience better than they had on the day. Their album is a reflection of the detail, the emotion, the love, the family, the venue… most of which is often just a blur. We’re adding value to our clients, by also adding value to theirs.

Be clear how you add value to your clients

The challenge is to do it in an authentic, respectful and in way that honors people, and real value is only really provided when it’s perceived as of value from the other persons perspective.

When a Bride and Groom cries when they open their album for the first time, or when our product helps a photographer up-sell to their clients, or when we can help a photographer spend more time with their family by doing some of their work for them – we’ve added value to their life in a way that no marketing or sales strategy could ever achieve.

Cheers, Stephen.

An awesome presentation and Q and A with Gary Vay Ner Chuk. In this he talks very powerfully about “Working the Room”, His Strategy, And about how the internet is about getting eyeballs.

To use his term he is pretty Potty Mouth. But don’t get put off by that, he is authentic, deep and extremely passionate.

Awesome and thank you Gary.

Wow I can’t believe how this year has raced by. Earlier in the year I started a personal project and decided to write an ebook as an introduction to internet marketing. The basic idea being that I seem to always be discussing the topic and answering people’s questions about what to do and how to get started.

Anyway earlier this week I released it as a FREE ebook “TUI’s Net Profits – Easy Tips for Setting Your Business Up Online & Marketing it Profitably”

I guess I’ve condensed some of my 20 years of online marketing, entrepreneurial, business and social media experience in a hopefully simple, easy to follow guide to walk you through setting up your online business and marketing it profitably.

Download this FREE Introduction to Internet Marketing e-book here

The highlights are …

• 35 specific, targeted and implementable tips and tricks
• Tools and resources to help you get your venture underway and start promoting it
• An introduction to online marketing strategies including email, video, social media, article and ebook marketing
• A guide to developing content and look at the basics of Search Engine Optimisation (SEO)
• An introduction to affiliate marketing as the basis of an online business or as a way to compliment your existing one.
• Top 10 mistakes beginner Internet Marketers make

And finally, I “out” my 10 Internet Marketing Gods. These are people I have learned alot from and you should want to follow too.

You can get a full introduction to this Internet Marketing Guide here or you can download it free here

It’s been alot of fun, but the title of the book contains a hint to its progress v1.01b. That’s how I see it, as a beta release looking for feedback. It’s a good start but something the team and I will build on over time. It need’s even more tips and tricks, to be made more visually stimulating and of course as people get more involved they will be looking for more advanced information. Finally I’ll hand it to Ian and Nigel someday and I am sure they will tighten up the writing.

Read, share with your friends, and please come back and let me know what you think.

Thanks. (ctbpyv3a8i)

So, you’ve taken the plunge and decided to outsource some of your Internet business to Elance.

Good for you! Elance has a tremendous marketplace of designers, writers and other professionals that can help you take your business to the next level. Still, if you’ve never done business on Elance, there can be some things worth thinking about. Here are seven things to keep in mind when handling providers on Elance:

1. Use Escrow.

The Elance Escrow service is free, and it’s essential. The escrow service allows you to place the funds for your project into an escrow account while the provider does their work. When the work is complete and you’ve reviewed and approved of it, you release the escrow funds to the provider. Escrow protects you in the event that the provider’s services aren’t up to par, or if the provider disappears.

2. Try to be clear about your expectations.

The more details you can give to a provider, the more likely it will be that the project turns out the way you’re hoping it will. If you’re hoping for an ebook that’s 100 pages in length, make sure to include that in the bid. If you only want a local provider, make sure to state that, as well.

3. Use the Elance feedback system.

You need to rely on the Elance feedback system the same way you rely on the feedback system on sites like Ebay. Check a provider’s feedback prior to hiring them. Don’t just look at the overall rating, either. Look for specific comments, and see what others have thought about the provider. Likewise, when your project is over, be sure to leave honest and accurate feedback about your experience with the provider.

4. Don’t be tempted by low prices.

The old axiom about getting what you pay for is as true on Elance as it is anywhere else. If you can’t afford to hire someone capable, wait until you can. Don’t throw your money down the drain by using a substandard provider just because they’re cheap.

5. Be wary of suggestions to work outside of Elance.

The Elance Terms of Service dictate that projects have to be done within the Elance system. There is no practical benefit to you of taking your business outside of Elance. Many people who have done so in the past have found themselves scammed, because they didn’t have the protection of the Elance system or the Escrow system.

6. Communicate clearly.

If you want regular status updates on your project, ask for them. Many providers won’t bother you during the course of the project unless they’ve got a question. Don’t be afraid to ask how things are going along the way if you want to know.

7. Remember that Elance is worldwide in scope.

This means a few things for you. First of all, it means you may be in different time zones from your provider. It also means that some providers may have a weak grasp of English, and so you may have difficulty communicating with them on the project. This doesn’t mean they won’t do a good job, it just means you should expect some bumps in the process as you try to overcome the language barrier.

Have a look at Elance now.

If you want more information on Internet Marketing I’ve written an ebook, you can find an introduction to this free Internet Marketing Guide here or you can download it free here

Outsource Your Web Writing on Elance

One of the best things you can do to free up time and devote yourself to new and profitable ways of running your business is to outsource. Let’s face it, there are many task in your web business that just seem to soak up huge amounts of your time. Outsourcing some of these tasks lets you focus on the things you do best, controls your capital costs, increases your efficiency, and lets you use real experts to do the things that need to be done.

An area that many Internet entrepreneurs choose to outsource is their web writing. While some people find writing for the web enjoyable, others find it tedious or difficult. On top of that there are some types of web writing – such as your site copy, sales pages and even blog posts – that can benefit from a degree of expertise that you don’t necessarily have.

There are several sites where you can find people willing to do these kinds of tasks for you. One of these sites, Elance, is ripe with talented and affordable providers. Still, there are some things to keep in mind when you outsource your web writing on Elance.

Know What You Want

Elance offers you several categories into which you can put your job request. A sales letter, for example, is a very different type of job than an ebook or a blog. Being able to correctly categorize the type of writing you want to outsource will increase the chances that the best providers will be able to find your project.

You should also be clean in your project listing what you are expecting. If you want clear, compelling writing, say so. If you want the web writing to be humorous or edgy, say that as well. The more specifically you can define your project, the more likely you will be to find someone who can really get the job done.

Check Portfolios

If you’re interested in a particular writer on Elance, spend some time going through their portfolio. They may have a separate web site portfolio, or they may use the Elance portfolio. In either case, make sure you look at the quality of their writing, as well as their writing voice, to make sure that you want to hire them.

It is generally not a good idea to ask for a sample piece. Most of the best providers on Elance don’t provide free samples of their writing, and will instead ask you to consider their portfolio.

You Get What You Pay For

You should also understand that the lowest bid on your project isn’t always the best to choose. There are providers on Elance who are willing to work for next to nothing. The problem with these providers is that the writing they do for you is, in many cases, completely unusable. There will be grammatical errors, spelling errors and, in some cases, complete gibberish.

Using Elance to find someone to do your web writing for you can be a wonderful experience or it can be a nightmare. These three overriding principles, however, will save you a tremendous amount of headache.

If you want more information on Internet Marketing I’ve written an ebook, you can find an introduction to this free Internet Marketing Guide here or you can download it free here

Affiliate marketing, in the most basic sense, is the process whereby you promote someone else’s product for a share in the profits. In many ways, affiliate marketing is a lot like traditional commissions-based sales. If you sell a product, you get paid. If you don’t sell anything, you don’t get paid. Affiliate marketing, then, offers you a nearly limitless opportunity for making money online.

One of the most important steps in getting started with affiliate marketing is choosing the right products or programs to sell. There are several factors that go into choosing a product, some of them personal and some of them based more on information you’re able to gather along the way.

Here are some of the most important things to consider when choosing products for your affiliate marketing venture:

1. Personal knowledge.

If you want to sell affiliate products successfully, you need to know something about the product and about the niche. One of the ways you’re going to sell your product is by convincing other people that you are an authority in your field, and that if you recommend a product it is, at the very least, worth looking at. If you know nothing about the product or its niche, you either need to choose another product or take the time to educate yourself.

2. Quality of the Product.

Let’s face it, there are a lot of affiliate programs out there that promote substandard products. You’re going to be putting your name and reputation on the line promoting your affiliate products, so you need to make sure they’re a good value. If it’s a product you wouldn’t recommend to a family member, it’s probably not a product you should recommend to anyone else. Your personal ethics play an important part in this decision, so don’t try to sell something your conscience doesn’t agree with or you’ll find you’re not making many sales.

3. The niche market.

Here’s where you need to do some serious research. There are some niche markets that are so saturated that it’s next to impossible to break into them. Entering these crowded marketplaces is extremely challenging, and you have only a small chance at success. On the other hand, choosing a niche market that’s too small has the same result. Remember: just because you’re the only one selling a product doesn’t mean it’s because you were first; often it means that there just isn’t enough interest.

4. Profits.

The potential profit of an affiliate product is something to consider, as well. If you make less than a dollar on each sale, you’re going to have to sell tens of thousands of products to make a living. On the other hand, if you make $100 or more on each sale, chances are you’re going to have to work much harder to get each and every sale. Find a product somewhere in the middle, one that you think you can do a good volume of sales with and that pays you a fair amount per sale.

If you want more information on Internet Marketing I’ve written an ebook, you can find an introduction to this free Internet Marketing Guide here or you can download it free here

Squidoo is one of the more interesting and useful marketing tools on the Internet. Founded by marketing guru Seth Godin, Squidoo combines the best features of article directories, blogs and social networking sites and rolls them together into one package. In addition, Squidoo is a great way to get to the top of the search engine rankings for some types of keywords.

Here are some things you can do to get the most from your Squidoo marketing efforts:

1. Do your research.

Before you set up a Squidoo lens, do a little bit of research. Figure out if the keywords you’re trying to rank in are competitive. Check out other lenses in your niche to see how well they are (or aren’t) doing.

2. When you create your Squidoo lens, make sure your keyword phrase is your title. This helps search engines to fine your lens.

3. The higher you can get your lens to rank in its category on Squidoo, the higher your rank will appear in Google. Make a lens that’s popular on Squidoo, and the search engines will love it.

4. Create backlinks to your Squidoo lens. Whether it’s from article directories like EzineArticles or whether it’s from your blogs, throw some link love to your Squidoo lens.

5. Don’t forget social bookmarking. Whatever social bookmarking tool seems to work best in your niche, use it. For some that will be Digg, for others that may be StumbleUpon or one of the many other bookmarking sites. Play around a bit to see which work best.

6. Make sure your content is well-written. If your lens is gibberish, no one is going to want to buy your products. Part of being able to market effectively is being able to establish yourself as an authority or an expert in your niche. Poor writing detracts from your lens and it diminishes your authority.

7. Make sure your content is relevant. If you’re trying to promote an ebook on a particular approach to nutrition, don’t include things in your Squidoo lens about gardening. Stay focused on your niche area, and you won’t give your readers a reason to get bored or uninterested.

8. Study the Squidoo help pages and FAQs. They give you specific information about how to increase your lens ranking, how to increase your lensmaster reputation and, ultimately, how to increase the revenue from your lens. The marketing articles on Squidoo are also extremely helpful, not only with Squidoo marketing but with other types of online marketing efforts, as well.

9. Use Groups. Join Squidoo groups that are busy and that are relevant to your niche. Get friendly with the other lensmasters, and you can grow together.

10. Study the Lens of the Day Group.

This group will give you all sorts of inspiration, as well as practical advice about how to improve your lenses. If your lens is complete and ready for prime time, enter it into the Lens of the Day contest, as well.

If you want more information on Internet Marketing I’ve written an ebook, you can find an introduction to this free Internet Marketing Guide here or you can download it free here