Luckily, we snuck right in there due to having VIP tickets. OK, well, I had to wait right behind FOX news. But I guess I’ll live with that. Thanks a lot, Shecky’s!!

The vendors were selling mostly accessories and beauty products or services. My compatriot was looking for a dress but the selection of dresses was fairly limited. It was fun to see a few girls go to a little striped tent and try some things on. There were LOTS of big, sparkly bangles and necklaces, and it was very exciting to see some “green” accessory folks there. Using reclaimed potato chip bags to make purses makes for a definite conversation piece, but there were also bangles made out of bamboo and other renewables that caught my eye, as well as a couple of fair trade vendors.

I did find a top that I liked – it was a corset top made from several different strips of differing fabrics. It would have been fab for going out or pairing with a pair of suit pants, but unfortunately it broke my bank at $580. It looked like a lot of work went into it (which is why I liked it), so I didn’t want to insult the artist by bargaining down to where I was more comfortable. But it was stunning!

And maybe today I’m a bit upset at myself for not trying to bargain. Maybe.

Even though Shecky’s has moved on, you can check out d’marie for their frozen wine. I already own a bag or two for parties so I didn’t buy any, but I love their food and would have bought it if it didn’t already live in my pantry. I’ve seen them at other shows like the One of A Kind Show at the Merchandise Mart in December. Love, love, love.

I did buy some bath fizzies at Bath By Riley. Yay, Etsy! If you are not familiar with Etsy, sort of an eBay for homemade items, definitely wander over there. (Pretty much anything you can think of, and some things you couldn’t, someone’s made it.)

The only downside seemed to be that the vendors lacked energy. This lethargy was also commented on by my companion, so I know I wasn’t imagining it. They didn’t seem happy to be there – not even the bartenders. Come on…unhappy bartenders? I can get that at the corner pub when their nicotine level is low.

I don’t know if the economy has the vendors down, in which case I feel terrible for them, or there was something else going on. I’ve sold in booths before. Usually you start off with some energy on day one, and then rapidly become cynical by the last day, and start hating puppies and kittens and fantasize about tripping people when they walk by and pretend you don’t exist.

So I expected, going on the first day, that there would be some enthusiasm. The only real enthusiasm came from a woman telling me that perhaps I was too fat for my own good and that this product helped her lose 25 pounds. OK, she was selling a weight loss product. But still. Accosting people and implying they need to lose weight…not a good strategy.

I guess I shouldn’t feel too bad because my coworker got accosted by the laser surgery lady. So being “fat", I suppose, is better than feeling like perhaps you need a layer of your skin fried off to look better.

Otherwise it was worth the trip and fun. Having worked retail, I feel kind of bad saying this, but if you are looking for interesting and unique jewelry and/or purses, this is your place – they’ll most likely bargain and you’ll get a good deal.

New toy to geek out with! Yay!

I know that I keep trying to improve my photography, and so I was happy to stumble on this tutorial series by Kodak – some basics for improving your already mad skillz.

I suppose I have to give it to Whole Foods’ slick marketing gurus – it’s a genius of an idea. Practically force someone to donate to the charity of the week by manipulating the controls of a psychological Playstation.

Whole Foods Market has a reusable bag refund. It’s like nothing. 10 cents per bag. Bring three bags, it’s still only 30 cents. But hey, you are getting some kind of reward for being green, no matter how small, right?

You’re checking out, and the cashier looks at you meaningfully, and says, “would you like to donate your reusable bag credit to X Children’s Hospital?

You’re now standing there, being looked at expectantly by people in line and by the cashier. And it’s only 30 cents. And it’s not even like you have to dig in that pocket for your 30 cents. You don’t technically HAVE that 30 cents – it’s a bonus.

You pause.

In that pause you already feel the people in line staring.

Irritated, but feeling pressured, you say, in a small, squeeky, and 100% insincere voice, “sure.”

You are irritated because you know that this children’s hospital is part of an extremely WELL FUNDED, MAGNET HOSPITAL SYSTEM THAT CONSTANTLY GETS IN TROUBLE FOR NOT PROVIDING ENOUGH CHARITY CARE AND PROVIDES PISS POOR CARE TO UNINSURED AND UNDERINSURED FOLKS.

*ahem*

Then you think, “well, I’m sure the extortion is temporary. I’m sure next time I come it’ll be a different charity, or this one will be over.”

And yet, go back two weeks later and you’re asked the same question, in exactly the same circumstances. People staring at you expectantly again, meaning no matter how you phrase it, people will hear your refusal in this way:

NO. I don’t want to help sick children. I don’t give a crap about sick children, and I WANT MY GOD—N THIRTY CENTS. I’M SO FUGGING CHEAP I WANT MY MEASLY THIRTY CENTS OVER HELPING SICK CHILDREN.

How much of an ogre do you look like if you do say no?

Hospital system, you don’t need my freaking 30 cents. You know it, and I know it.

Genius. And pure evil.

I’m impressed, in a really, really annoyed way.

P.S. Dear Citizens, if you are looking for a charity you can trust to spend your dollars wisely, check out Charity Navigator. They rate charities by how they spend your dollars.

SAMPLE cool cocktails, beauty treats, games, and more from Shecky’s partners.

SCORE up to $100 in beauty products and fun freebies in Shecky’s Famous Goodie Bag.

SHOP hundreds of hot, one-of-a-kind items from indie designers and boutiques across the U.S.—all at up to 75 percent off!

Aside from their events, Shecky’s synthesizes the hot trends and lets you know where to find them, with links to the online retailers. I really enjoy this feature, as who has time to comb through all online sites to find the best options? For instance, their feature on lace tights included the best of the best and what to wear them with. It reminds me a bit of The Lucky Shopping Manual that I have previously recommended, only the writing style is more friendly and the links make it easier to find what you want.

Sign up to be a Shecky’s Insider on the website to get emails and watch Stylefool for a sponsored giveaway!

Shecky’s Girls Night Out Chicago

Date: Wed.-Fri., Mar. 18th-20th, 2009
Time: 5pm-10pm
Place: The Great Hall at Chicago Union Station
210 S. Canal St. (entrance on Jackson Blvd.)
Price: $25 in advance, and $15 if purchased before February 25th!

At the risk of sounding like your old Uncle Fred, who complains about the “youth of today” and how he walked to school uphill, both ways, in the snow, with no shoes – I have to say that I was using eBay back when there were very, very few things listed in 1997. I was so excited to find the site – I think it was through Geocities, actually – and knew it was going to be big. (Your Czarina is a bit of a geek. In college I was using Telnet and Usenet. And Gopher. If you don’t know what any of that means, you don’t have the girl geek disease.)

I was a devotee for a long time. I purchased a good amount of our wedding supplies from eBay, and quite a few old books and antiques. Unfortunately, in the last couple of years, your Czarina has been hoping and wishing that someone would start a competing service.

Ebay is simply unfair 1) to sellers, because the fees are absolutely outrageous, 2) to buyers, because the site has become so cluttered with counterfeiters and rip-off artists, and 3) they force everyone to use PayPal, and PayPal sucks. I have experienced all three of these categories and it was deeply unpleasant.

First, I have tried to sell things, and, while I have managed to sell one or two things, eBay’s sale percentage fees came to a substantial amount of the purchase. They continually raise these fees. Then, if you throw in PayPal fees, and shipping fees, it rapidly becomes not worth it to sell. I can pass some of the cost on to the buyer, but do that too much and you won’t be selling anything.

Second, as a buyer, I would love to be able to purchase handbags without having to go through an elaborate authentication process. An entire subforum on The Purse Forum is dedicated to the vagaries of buying on eBay, and the site has detailed information as to whether a bag on eBay is authentic or a nasty copy. I’m not going to get into the ethics of counterfeit bags here (at least today) but your Czarina is against them. I also got ripped off once. I bought a Tod’s bag that was supposed to be authentic, and the seller had lots of positive feedback, but instead it was lousy copy. I wasn’t sophisticated enough at that time to know exactly to what extent bags are faked. Today they are faked down to the zippers. When I brought it into the Tod’s store on Oak Street to be fixed, I read it in their faces: it was fake. I was very embarrassed and that was the last time I bought anything of any value on eBay.

I also like to collect pretty but mismatched teacups. Last year, the last teacup I bought was hideous and not at all as described. And that was the last time I bought anything on eBay. It just isn’t worth the risk, trouble, or money.

Third, PayPal sucks and good luck ever getting decent customer service if something goes wrong. You can find the stories and mine isn’t that much different.

BUT – insert angels singing here – someone heard me and started a new online auction service that’s growing by the day. Meet Bonanzle. It is much easier to use, much easier to find things, and as of now, fees are very, very low or nonexistent. You can even import your feedback from eBay so you aren’t starting all over in the reputation arena. Bonanzle has a little more of a social media aspect to it; you can IM your seller and everyone has a “booth,” including yours truly.

I’m sure some people will disagree with me and say that eBay is still worth it. But for what I need it for, it isn’t. Since customer service and technology that serves YOU instead of enslaving you is what I’m all about here, I’m all about Bonanzle instead. Check it out.

Another year, another birthday that isn’t your Czarina’s. I haven’t had a birthday since my 29th.

What?

Not having birthdays doesn’t stop me from asking for birthday presents, though…usually in the form of something from Mulberry. But we’re not talking about my contorted and highly rule-intensive birthday construct for myself. We’re talking about the Czar’s birthday, and the distinct WTFery that danced on the periphery. It’s going to be a weird year.

As your Czarina has said in the last post, life hasn’t stopped because she stopped blogging. No! In fact, she has been accumulating an entire eight months’ worth of customer service sucktitude that she is excited to share with you over the next couple of weeks, in the form of her 2009 Crud List.

The people, organizations or companies on the Crud List have committed real or imagined affronts to customer service, in the Czarina’s opinion (which is the only opinion that really counts.)

Without further ado, the first company to make the 2009 Crud List:

Neiman Marcus: Theoretically I could give NM a break, because all of retail is suffering. I used to work retail to put myself through grad school, and I can tell you it is brutal. I once had a woman scream at me for not holding a $40 skirt for her – she had not asked me or any other salesgirl to do so. She left it in the dressing room and wandered off after something shiny during a crazy markdown sale with lines to use the dressing room a mile long. So, of course, someone used that dressing room after the woman had left it and decided to buy that particular skirt. Rabid Skirt Woman was foaming at the mouth when she found it missing out of the dressing room. C’mon, lady. If you want it that badly, then keep it with you.

As a result of these experiences, the Czarina does not abuse retail help and takes a dim view of anyone who does. But I just can’t give NM any more leeway. I feel like I’ve been generous enough. Their downslide started way back here, with NM Online. Over the past year or so the bad customer service has leaked over into the Michigan Avenue store. I’ve walked in there, browsing their lovely purse department, and I have been alteratively ignored, assaulted by fragrance people (although this isn’t their fault, they’re like wandering minstrels over there), given the once over and assessed to be wanting in…oh, I don’t know, class?

This is a riot, because: hey, NM? Your sales are down. By like, a lot. Women’s Wear Daily says you are in pain along with Saks. I’m not going to dress up to go there when it’s 80 below. I’m going to look like a North Face wearing, frostbitten, Malemute wrestling, arctic explorer with Canadian Ugg ripoffs. At least Saks NYC had the courtesy to have a 70% off handbags sale, which resulted in practically a stampede. You have done no such thing.

In addition, NM is now also Bergdorf Goodman online. At first I thought this was great because I could use my NM charge and have things sent to me without paying the INSANE 10.25% SALES TAX THANKS TODD STROGER. WAY TO GO KILLING CHICAGO INDEPENDENT RETAIL. (As an aside, when I was shopping in LA this summer, I think the guy at YSL was about ready to pop out of his skin when I told him about our sales tax.)

I guess unsurprisingly, the customer service at BG Online was just as bad. They didn’t give me credit for something I had returned for the longest time because they had a shortened version of my name on the shipping label and my full name on the credit information. Because a nickname TOTALLY means a different person! It took me almost a month to get that resolved and I called every single day for about a week. And you know I have nothing better to do.

So to sum up: in person, NM’s customer service is crud. Online, it’s also crud. Guess what? I can get 99% of stuff I would ever get at NM elsewhere and probably for less. Some luxury companies understand that the days of the 5k handbag are over…at least for anyone who isn’t using bejeweled Charmin.

I really hope they learn their lesson. In a way it’s very sad that a place that was supposed to be all about the service now seems to be all about nothing.

For that, NM folks, you have the honor of being the Czarina’s first “C List” installment. Enjoy! Don’t forget your Ugg ripoffs when you’re out in the cold.