{ middle of the road }

NZ: There and Back Again

2012-01-22T20:17:00.002-05:00

This is what 30+ hours of travel time looks like in my world.


Super cool guy (forgot name) I set with from ATL to LA - A Christian Rapper

Very Modern Nuns

Block Party - LA Airport

Melbourne, Australia Airport

My first (AMAZING) glimpse, flying over the West Coast of New Zealand:

Christchurch Airport, heading north

Melbourne Airport, return trip

The sprawl of LA

Breakfast + A Movie

[Farm to] Table Manners

2012-01-22T18:16:00.000-05:00

Considering how little interest I had in cooking, and being in the kitchen in general, while I was growing up, it may be surprising that I've become so interested and involved in food, its preparation, where it comes from, how it's grown or raised, and how it's processed/stored/transported. Then again, most of my childhood was spent playing in the dirt or wandering around the farm/ranch and even helping pick veggies out of the garden. When you think about it, that is where our food comes from and those experiences set me up for an adulthood where I want to stay connected to the good things associated with them. I'm still no true expert at cooking, growing a garden, or raising animals for food, but I do know that quality over quantity makes all the difference when it comes to taste and nutrition and the health benefits of what that means when food enters our bodies. How we raise animals for food, how far we transport our veggies, the greatly diminished time families spend together in the kitchen, and the abundance of over-processed, low-nutrition food products have become the norm and people are taking notice and demanding change.

Yesterday I attended a viewing party and potluck for a TEDx event called Changing the Way we Eat. It was a series of day-long talks from various folks about the state of America's Food System. There was obviously a lot of bad news presented including animal welfare, the overuse of antibiotics in overpopulated animal containment areas, genetically modified products, unnecessary chemicals put on crops, processed and preserved food and its lack of nutrition and effect on our health, monocrops, the loss of good soil, and the astronomically low amount farmers are compensated vs. the profit of the companies that "own" them. So many things feel upside down in this process. But there were many good ideas to talk about, too. I wanted to briefly mention some ideas that were highlighted and I thought would be worth sharing. I apologize since these aren't all referenced properly.

Favorite quote: "You can either pay the farmer or pay the doctor."

Favorite website: www.RealTimeFarms.com - lets you find local farmers and see where your food comes from. Some intensive research went into this and I'm so grateful and excited to be able to take advantage of all their hard work.

Food practices that need label adjustments: USDA requires companies to put "uncured" on labels of meat products that use natural instead of synthetic nitrates to cure meat; "cold pasteurized" often means irradiated; carbon monoxide is added to meat to preserve its red color, so the meat can spoil but still look nice; GMOs need to plainly be stated on their packages.

Easiest way to make an immediate difference: Meatless Mondays (and maybe Thursdays, too?) I probably eat meat only 2-4 days a week and that never feels like a sacrifice to me.

Favorite product: Fresh paper by Fenugreen - claims to keep produce fresh 2-4 times longer using natural herbs

Coolest urban food-based art project: Green Bronx Machine which plants wall and roof gardens everywhere. They call it "green graffiti."

Movie I'm inspired to see: Temple Grandin about an autistic woman (and PhD-earner) who helped change the way livestock was treated. [I'm also linking her TED talk, which I haven't watched yet.]

Favorite outreach: Organic Therapy Program in Milwaukee, WI which uses gardening to help treat war veterans [Center for Veterans Issues]

Favorite project in the works: Building greenhouses at grocery stores so the produce is as fresh as possible.

Biggest hope: We will reconnect to each other by conscientiously growing, cooking, and eating real food, starting a revolution in the process, and slow down to enjoy the simplest pleasures in life again.

I hope this helps lead you to your own path of choosing fresher, better food for you and your families. If you're in the neighborhood, please stop by for a meal. I'll be happy to whip something up for us. Take note that at some point you will eat something that has been dropped on the floor either before or after cooking. Don't worry, I'll make sure to wipe/wash it off. The health inspector doesn't make house calls and besides, we need a few germs to boost the immune system.

New Zealand: Pano-tastic

2012-01-16T14:03:00.000-05:00

I present the first installment of my 12 day New Zealand experience in photos. All of the images below are landscape panoramas from various regions of the South Island. I know it's taken me, oh, 10 months to post these, but that really isn't the important part. [As always, click to view larger image.]

View from the top of Mt Isobel

Along the drive into Akaroa

Christchurch

Ranch land outside Fiordland Nat'l Park

Lake where we car camped

Milford Sound - this photo dwarfs the actual size of these protruding giants

Lake Hawea

Fox Glacier riverbed - view of both directions

Deception Valley

Road to Otira Valley

Otira Valley - probably the most beautiful place I saw (not a pano)

Waimakariri Valley - Arthur's Pass Nat'l Park

Truman Beach - Paparoa Nat'l Park; North of Punakaiki

South of Charleston

Tauranga Bay, South of Westport

On the road to Denniston, an old coal mining town, looking out over the Karamea Bight

Buller Gorge; Ohikanui River flowing into the Buller River

As soon as I find my maps, I'll label the other places. So many more photos left to show you...aren't you excited?!?

2011 Retrospectacle

2012-01-07T18:28:00.002-05:00

First and foremost, a big Goodbye and Thank You to the year 2011. Yet again, I am amazed and grateful that I've made it through another year healthy, fully intact, and on the high side of some imaginary line of mediocrity that I have in my head. And whew I've been busy! My blog posts have been fewer and farther between the last part of the year....I've been distracted. Let's just quickly recount some highlights, since I'll probably want to remember this: 12 beginning Spanish lessons, 11 live music shows (actually way more, but I'm sticking it here), 10 days in New Zealand, 9 lovely new friends, 8 trips to visit family and friends, 7 new pairs of shoes, give or take (bloody consumer), 6 or more climbs to the top of the mountain, 5 times as much homemade cooking than normal (gonna hate to clean that oven when I move out), 4 new pieces of upgraded camera equipment, 3 times as many books read, 2 races I volunteered to photograph (among other volunteer work that I thoroughly enjoyed), 1 fun trail race under my belt, and the bonus: winner in an art contest. Of course, it hasn't been all chocolate-caramel lattes and cheesecake. I've lost my faith in humanity and (barely) gained it back at least twice a day, longed for a four-legged running partner and furry, night-time foot warmer, cursed at random traffic and my car repair bills, eaten dinner alone more times than not, have unchecked items from last year's to do list, and have yet to save the world. But complaining doesn't get you anywhere, so if I start to, remind me to shut the flap up and either change the situation or mentally move on.

If I believed in luck, I would say I'm damn lucky. If I believed in God, I would say I'm blessed. If I believed in fate, I would say I'm on the right course. Mostly, I think I have a wonderful, supportive clan of family and friends and I try to invite only the good stuff into my life. The bad is not always avoidable, but the determination to keep rolling, to keep improving, and live like tomorrow is just a dream is always there. I find home on the tops of mountains, in the rolling green hills of East Tennessee, eating breakfast in a sunny window, cleaning muddy dog prints off the floor, cooking and enjoying a meal together, laughing at the wrong answer, the best song on my iPod, deep breaths and long stretches, sand or grass between my toes, making something useful, and holding hands.

But I know what you're all really here for...it is kind of a photo blog, after all. So, without further rambling, here are some of my faves from the last year:


Raccoon Mountain


Tennessee River - Nickajack Lake

Machines are People Too - Nightfall Concert

4 Deep in a Honda Tour - Boone, NC

Chickamauga Battlefield Marathon

Winter

Field of Gnats

Chickamauga Battlefield Marathon

Music at The Crash Pad Hostel

Sculpture Burn - MainX24


Art Installation - MainX24

Snowy Trail Run - Raccoon Mtn

Hello 2012.

Welcome to your place in time.

I have a feeling you're going to be eye-opening.

The Feel of Fall

2011-10-28T23:40:00.001-04:00

Here it is: autumn. And with it, the usual shift in mindset and winter preparation. My clothing layers have increased dramatically, I'm wearing close-toed shoes, and the craving for all things pumpkin and warm are blowing in with the cooler wind. I want to feel comfortable and cozy and nestled in when I'm home. I'm cooking more, but that's mostly due to a change in lifestyle and the practicing-what-I-want-to-preach philosophy; and because I need to save more money. I don't know if I'm saving money, but I'm really enjoying the meal prep. I'm not much of a baker, but I threw in a pumpkin pie with the weekly quiche tonight. Hey, the oven was already on, so why not? I'm not one to follow recipes too closely, so I hodge-podged a few together that I found on the internet to suit the ingredients list I had on hand. Preliminary results were good (taste-testing from the oven), but it took longer to bake than expected (note for next time: decrease liquid). I'm not exactly sure where this inability to follow a recipe came from, but it probably started my sophomore year of college when my roommate and I decided we would cook together every night. We never truly used a recipe and 98% of what we made was edible, so I'm sure that contributed greatly to my experimental cooking efforts. When it did fail, we went to Hardee's and got biscuits (which sounds disgusting to me now). I'm sure my mom has wished I would've discovered that being less anal was a good thing a little earlier in life. Sorry, Ma, for my early interests in uber and unattainable delusions of perfectionism...I'm mostly over it. I do have one very important cooking flaw I should fess up to: I am terrible at cracking eggs. I've come to expect the occasional crunch of egg shell in my omelettes. I've also been juicing the past couple of weeks since I got a hand-me-down juicer. My fave is below: apple, carrot, ginger, and beet. It's oh-so-pretty before you stir it up.

I also did a little wandering through the fall-colored forest last weekend with my friends Dave and Matt (and his pup River). It was perfect hiking weather.

Matt + I self portrait

Laurel Falls

It's hard to photograph a moving puppy...

Dave photographing and Matt being tackled by River

River was scared to cross the bridge...aww.

Food [Movies] for Thought

2011-10-16T21:44:00.000-04:00

I am guilty. I watch, read, listen to, Facebook share, and blog about things I know and care about and attempt to limit the outpouring of info that my brain doesn't align with. Sometimes I have to switch over for the 10 minutes I can tolerate and hear the other side's viewpoint because sometimes we actually agree or "they" make a good point. I also try to see both sides of an issue because, even if I disagree, I don't want to make narrow-mindedness a personality flaw. It comes down to priorities, what is important to "you" and what are you going to do about it? What seems to get lost are the Why's to someone's thinking (use your deductive reasoning and common sense....don't be a sheep), the long-term outcomes, and when we are going to start/get there. Many seem so paralyzed by the How's, pent-up anger, and inability to listen and cooperate that little gets accomplished except finger-pointing and backdoor politics. We can't afford to continue to be indecisive and keep putting band-aids on gushing wounds. But there are folks who are doing the work, whether it be for the good of the planet (these are my people) or to line their pockets, they are in the background and making things happen. I watched three documentaries this week produced by people who are Paying Attention and Making Good Things Happen. Although I already knew quite a bit about the issues outlined in all of them, I liked the perspectives of each film. One was called Dive!, and it highlighted the food waste in America (half of all produced) and people who save some of this still-edible food from landfills. [Sidenote: Here I would like to ask you to reconsider and question the often ridiculous "safety" practices we have in effect.] The second movie was called Dirt! and I teared up no less than 6 times during the 80 minute version; it weighs heavy on my conscious how disconnected and distracted most of us are from what is truly important in this world. Dirt! is essentially about how such a seemingly inert substance is so important to the survival of all of us. Although quite different, the connections between these two movies is obvious. Neither are a snooze-fest and you don't have to be a tree-hugging hippie to know that something is terribly wrong with the way food is grown, produced, and distributed and how we are misusing and rapidly destroying the environment. When we lose what feeds us, we lose. Literally. Lights out. No more life-sustaining planet, no more humans. I am the last person to use fear to promote any effort, but this truly scares, this keeps me awake at night, and we need to start making changes now. Which brings me to the third documentary: An Inconvenient Truth. Yes, I know I'm several years late watching this one, but, like I mentioned, I already know quite a bit on this topic and didn't think it was truly necessary to see it immediately. I'm really glad I finally watched it, though. The thing is, you don't need to support Global Warming or Climate Change to realize that how we get (and waste) our energy is completely bass ackwards and there are MUCH better alternatives that we can use right now.

Please, check your local library or university and see if these films are available. They are well worth your time and who needs to watch another episode of a "reality show" tonight? These are as real as it gets. Watch something you may not normally watch and ask what can you do for you. (I'll even consider watching your suggested documentaries.) If you don't know, ask me, I will help you. Millions of people making little changes makes a huge difference. You have power in your actions; you get to create the happy ending. You get to put your money where you want it to be spent...fewer purchases on more local, higher quality items and food, or continue to overburden our space with, mostly unnecessary, cheap junk from elsewhere that far more negatively impacts our health and environment than the pricetag shows. When it comes to the planet, I am definitely pro-life. Are you?

The Summer Plan

2011-08-31T20:16:00.000-04:00

Although it has blazed by, this has been my funnest summer since 2006. It's hard to compare to that, though, considering I was wandering around western Montana with a bunch of other fantastic photographers, taking classes about something I truly love, and not working. And even though a large majority of my day life is spent in an office, it's also been one of my most physically active summers. If I could have changed one thing, my summer would have involved more out-of-town travel, but I can't really complain. I had a goal to make up for some of my lack of activity last summer when I was still getting to know Chatt. Since visiting family in Florida, my weekends have gone like this: mountain biking, stand-up paddleboarding, 10 mile trail runs (my longest to date), river floating, rock climbing, free live music every weekend under the stars, art strolls, day-long hikes, trail running in "barefoot" shoes, skirts + sandals, cold beer, laughter in all the spaces in between, multiple clothing changes in a day to let the sweat dry, and a trip to Atlanta to remind me how much I appreciate Chatt's much-reduced traffic and population size and its close proximity to most any outdoor activity I can think of. There are things getting checked off the bucket list. My body is feeling a bit bruised, blistered, and banged up, but it has been well worth it. I've developed poison ivy rashes, blackened toenails, an assortment of new chin scars from sticks and briars, a taste for spiderwebs, and stamina that my 20 year-old self would have been envious of. The intense, humid heat has limited me a bit, but I'm still feeling strong and fit. I'm not quite where I want to be for my October trail race, but I'm getting there. I've joined some outdoor groups and have made some great new connections here with more outdoor-loving people. I've spent at least one morning every week, sometimes more, in the early coolness of the woods (the only coolness that could be found outside of a local blue hole..aka swimming hole), surrounded by trees, squirrels, bugs, and birds and the closest feeling to "home" that I know. I've photographed a triathlon and mud run and have more races on the list for the fall season. In short, life has been good.

Holiday looks good with SUP fins

Machines Are People Too @ Nightfall ~ Yay! Bubbles!

Art Stroll randomness

skirt+legs=my lower half

rock climbing

a 13 mile hike always needs a view

Foster Falls

swinging bridge

Castles in the Sand

2011-07-10T22:03:00.005-04:00

Vacation is a little work, a lot of play, a little escape, a little finding oneself, and always welcome in my world. Here are a few choice photos from my recent trip to visit many, many members of my extended maternal family. I won't bore you with too many family shots, not wanting to approach the realm of old school slide show projectors.

Two boys, entertaining themselves, who asked me to critique their style.
I gave them a few pointers and took a photo so they could see for themselves. They loved it.

I ♥ hammocks.

Nothing says July 4th like kids 'n sparklers.


Say hello to the Clampetts.


One of our best family portraits to date!

Watching fireworks on the beach.

15 second exposure + fireworks

Playing with light, photo courtesy of Mom.

Any fish called Wahoo has to taste good!

My official beverage of vacation.

I didn't build this one, maybe next time.

Thank you, family, for another great summer reunion.

The Smell of a Memory

2011-06-28T22:27:00.005-04:00

I mentioned to my friend, while we were watching a Pink Floyd cover band last week, how I could often smell my old college boyfriend's apartment when I heard one of their songs. He said he'd never had that experience before. What?!?!? Smelling things and having them take my mind to another time, or experiencing something, such as a song, that invokes the "smell" of a memory is huge for me. At the end of the week, I was listening to an NPR story about a woman who worked in the military division that identifies dead soldiers...the whole time I listened I could smell the morgue I used to work in and a body once the life has gone. Not a great memory, but an important one. I love the fact that I have this ability and thought it was one everybody possessed. I guess not. Maybe I'm just more in touch with my senses...lol.

On a totally different subject, while I was running on the Riverwalk today, a young Latino boy riding a bike ran smack dab into the back of my right calf. I knew what had happened and that I wasn't hurt aside from a little rubber burn, so it really didn't phase me. I stopped, turned around, and mustered up all the inner strength I had not to bust out laughing when I saw the little kiddo splayed out on the pavement. He looked up and I knew it was coming....the tears. The shock of what just happened (what DID happen? How was he completely oblivous to me being right in front of him? ...one more reason I prefer trail running) and that he was scared by some strange lady looking down at him appeared on his face as the tell-tale puckering lip. I don't think it makes me a bad person to want to laugh at children when they fall down, it just means I can find humor in any situation and that's a highly valuable life quality. And that's what I'm going to keep telling myself... Besides, he learned a valuable lesson today: sometimes in the battle of man vs machine, (wo)man wins.

And the last bit of inconsequential information for the day: Holiday, my (usually) trusty steed, is all shined up and ready for her road trip. She's welcome to flirt all she wants with the Jeeps on the beach...as long as they're carrying kayaks or stand-up paddleboards.

Reading Between the Signs

2011-06-26T22:24:00.006-04:00

What a strange week. Highlights: petting a red panda while on a photo shoot at the zoo. So awesome. Also, a peaceful trail run splashing through puddles in the rain. Low point: driving over some sort of metal piping (a bed rail?) on the interstate and spending hours trying to get a new tire to replace the one that was irreparably damaged. In the end, and against Subaru's recommendations, I ended up finding a used tire at a questionable tire center, with great customer service, that is definitely on the wrong side of the tracks. After tire #2 from their shop, I'm hoping it gets me to Florida and back because I am sooooo ready for vacation and family time. Actually, considering I haven't been out of Chatt in almost 2 1/2 months, I'm about a month and a half overdue for some out-of-town adventuring. Windows down, radio up...here I come.

Lots of thoughts going on in my head and feeling like something big may be making it's way to me (or I'm attracting it, rather). In one attempt to clear some space, I had a big Facebook "friend" ~~dump~~ release party. More will be liberated soon. As a personal site, not a business connection, I don't feel the need to be "friends" with every acquaintance I've made and I'm certainly not in some number competition. For me, it's always been about the quality, not quantity of friendships I maintain. So, adios to the folks who don't participate in sharing any meaningful information about their lives (I'm glad you enjoyed your mani/pedi, but don't care to read about it); sayonara to all those I have about a 2% chance of ever meeting up with again and best wishes in the future; kwaherini to the uninspiring; a sweet adieu to the ones I will be acquainted with again in a more personal email, postcard, or warm embrace but who don't use FB as a means of communication (loving sister, just delete your account). Hurt feelings are never the intention in these matters. The people I love and admire know it, regardless of our FB friend status. The feeds have become more of a learning tool for websites I track and finding out what's going on around town and in the world rather than a friend connector (although that does still happen) and I'm almost ready to move onto the next thing. And we all know there will be a Next Thing. For those who care to keep up with me outside the confines of FB, I'm using this blog to post more content that matters in my life, random thoughts, and, of course, photos. I feel the blog is a slightly more permanent fixture, at least for me, considering I've been journaling since 6th grade.

In a tribute to my upcoming road trip (WAH-HOOOO), I'm posting a link to a video by Greensky Bluegrass doing a cover of the Talking Heads' song "Road to Nowhere," which I just saw them perform at RiverBend. Pretty sweet cover and one of the best road trip songs of all time, in my opinion.

It's also time for photos. Here are some items that have caught my attention recently...


Anybody see a need for sidewalks?

I'm not even going to go here....

Bacterium Taste Buds

2011-06-21T20:51:00.001-04:00

The back of my apartment faces a hill covered with lovely trees and shrubbery. As I chucked the leftover stem of a jalapeno pepper out the backdoor, which is what I often do with food scraps (let's not get carried away thinking about how this isn't really composting and all the animals it attracts), the thought crossed my mind: do the microbes that break down all this yummy organic matter know when they're eating a jalapeno stem vs a banana peel? Do they have a "taste" preference? Does one microbe come in contact with a jalapeno and feel forced to move on because it can't take the burning sensation as it's processed (much like the weak members of my family; give me more Tobasco)? Having a degree in biology and a natural curiosity about the processes of life, I feel I should be able to answer this question without googling it, but I don't have one. So I'm going to do something totally out of character and just make it up. Okay, that's not quite true, I make things up quite often, but that's more imagination-related. I'm going to say....yes, they know the difference and have a preference. Someone who actually still remembers this sort of thing from class, or who loses their willpower and googles it, can prove me wrong. Thanks to my cousin's children and her facebook post, I was compelled to find images of what whale poop looked like the other day. I'm drawing the line.

Seven + Counting

2011-06-19T21:58:00.023-04:00

I had a stellar 7 mile road run last Sunday morning and a passable 7+ mile trial run yesterday morn. The sweetest words I'd ever heard while running floated through my thoughts at the first two mile turnaround yesterday....my brain said to me "I'm there already?" I'm loving that two miles feels like a jog down the block. Swimming, speed training, and some x-training/weights at the gym in between has worn me out; it was lovely not exercising today and my body thanks me. If I had gotten that nap in, I could've pegged this as a truly chill weekend day. Bluegrass + beer almost make up for it.

Crack Rock

2011-06-19T20:37:00.005-04:00

Who do I love listening to in my Pandora QuickMix right now? Ray LaMontagne, Mumford & Sons, and Lily Allen. Sad fact: I can't efficiently play Pandora on my quad core Windows (wanna be) computer and use Lightroom without killing it. (I think it's the craptastic video card.) At work, I'm all good; at home, I stream through my CrackBerry hooked up to an external speaker. Donations being accepted for the "Buy Jaimie a Mac Fund." I'll send my PayPal account info on request. Help me help me. Love you! :D

Ghetto Squirrel

2011-06-18T14:43:00.003-04:00

Sitting in my car at a Habitat for Humanity worksite, waiting for the contract photographer to arrive, I saw a rat run across the road in my driver's side mirror. Are rats the squirrels of the ghetto? I should know, I lived in these sorts of places a couple of times in my youth, but it's been so long now I can't remember. Perhaps the imagination of my childhood turned them into pumpkin-driving chauffeurs.

One Way Street

2011-06-16T00:13:00.009-04:00

I hopped down the stairs empty-handed, the items I'd come for left behind in the apartment on the right. I pushed the door leading to the clarity of the outside world a little harder than I'd intended, perhaps because I knew I was really leaving with what I'd needed from the beginning, my lost goal card and a full tank of mojo. I don't know if I've left an impression, but does it matter? When a two way street turns into a one way, all I care to do is keep driving.

Shower Power Stretch

2011-06-15T20:04:00.004-04:00

Note to self: no more post-run stretching in the shower. As I swung my right foot up for a hammy stretch, the outside edge slammed into the bottom of the faucet and left about 3/4 of an inch of skin there. Instead of uttering a string of profanities only used by sailors' prostitutes, I just held my breath and let the blood wash down the drain as the pain radiated out from the impact zone and I felt the beginnings of a spectacular bruise forming. Well played, Jaimie. Well played.

Trail Companions

2011-06-15T18:53:00.002-04:00

Three miles of speed work on a 1.5 mile trail loop brought me across two box turtles about 30 yards apart. Such a rare sight, then two in a row! Perhaps the splash-n-dash shower brought them out. Either way, I'm sure all three of us peed ourselves a little on initial contact as I zig-zagged around them. They were still there on my second loop and I'm sure they were glad the thundering behemoth that ripped past was finally gone so they could keep making the slow progression towards what I knew was going to be a night of sweet turtle lovin'.

I was also the entertainment for an extremely vigilant and rather large biting, yellow fly (?) during the eight minutes I sped through its territory. It probably thought that because I was breathing so absurdly loud and sweating like a dying wildebeest in August that I would keel over any second. I briefly thought it was right, but its dive bombs and fly-bys only hurried me along. Next time: bug spray.

Free to Roam

2011-06-11T17:52:00.006-04:00

As a follow-up to my last blog, I'm posting photos of the unveiling of my bus art...it is now free to roam.

Getting read for a par-tay!

Nice backside.

Seriously, that's enough cheesing and self-adoration.

How did I feel about seeing my photo on a bus? Well, I liken it to a musician hearing their song on the radio for the first time. And now I'm going to stop talking about it and posting info about it. I am immensely happy, but I'm done. Onto the next project! Sincere thanks to the sponsors + benefactors (River City Company, Public Art Chattanooga, Art in Motion, CARTA) and everyone who has complimented me on my work...lots of positive feedback and it is appreciated. I'm glad most people aren't brave enough to tell you when they think your work sucks, at least not to your face; I'll take your silence as a sign of approval. LOL.

We All Fall Down

2011-06-02T20:53:00.004-04:00

It finally happened. I took a fairly decent digger in the last mile of my trail run. Whether I was tired and not picking up my feet, was so hot I couldn't see because of the sweat dripping in my eyes (despite the visor), or a no-see-um got me doesn't matter. My ungraceful, arm-waving, giant foot-stepping tactic failed and I found myself on all fours. Fortunately, it wasn't an all out belly-to-the-ground, dirt-sandwich-eating, bloody palms kind of dive, but I know that one's coming. All I can hope for is to turn my head and keep all of my teeth when the moment arrives...and that if someone happens to witness my folly, they only have enough time to take a mental picture.

Highs + Lows

2011-05-14T07:53:00.020-04:00

Hello again, it's been a while. What have I been doing? Obviously not blogging. Traveling and work have taken up most of my time, and the travels have been amazing. I thought I'd have pics up from New Zealand by now, but my hard drive was filled up...I know you're asking why this is a problem, it's really a workflow thing and if it doesn't happen a certain way it screws me all up. The good news is a new drive arrived this week, so I should be able to get everything transferred and get those beotches edited and posted.

My posts are usually more photo-oriented, but I'm feeling the need to purge some personal things this go-round and writing helps clear my head, so try to bear with me. Don't worry, there will still be photos. =D

To sum up my personal photo career goals in recent months, I am, to a small degree, disappointed in myself. I did, however, accomplish one: I was one of five winners of a public art competition and it made me really proud that my work is going to be appreciated and seen. There is a laundry list of other tasks I want to accomplish but instead of trying to tackle all of them at once and getting frustrated, I'm checking off one at a time. But what good are lists if you forget to read them, right? Personal motivation is at the forefront and focus/priorities are clearer every day, so I know I'm progressing. I'm definitely a "big picture" type of person, but I can't let myself get overwhelmed with shoulda's, what if's, and I'm supposed to be... If I do, then life loses it's purpose and fun and I can't enjoy what's in my life already, knowing I'm going to make more good things happen. I don't believe our life is laid out for us or that we're on some predetermined path. I've experienced too much for me to believe otherwise. We make good choices and bad choices, and we don't always know which it is at the time. Learning through the process and making the most out of whatever comes my way, and whatever I invite into my life, is what has made it so great for me. My constant thought is this: the only thing I'll ever have is this one moment. What/who/where am I choosing to be/do right now? And the moment changes and we connect the dots and we create a life. Prepare for the future, live for today.

On a life-contemplating level, I think many people experience the same feeling I'm about to describe: I go through stages of intense growth and reach a plateau where I get comfortable and, eventually, bored, and feel the need to expand. I can only remember one really big time in my life where I've tumbled down quite a ways before starting the climb back up. There is not necessarily a predictable amount of time between these stages, but I know that I've been wandering across the same plateau for a little while now. As a photographer, it's probably been a little easier to recognize the growth and plateaus than it was before my life in photos. To illustrate it, I'll draw you a picture. (click to enlarge, life progress + happiness|fulfillment not to scale)

So, it's pretty obvious that my life has been getting progressively more amazing. What you can't see are all the other paths that I could've chosen; quite frankly, I'm not that good of an artist. The point, really, is that I can't go too long before craving more challenge and improving my life in one way or another, and right now I need to do that very strongly in three areas: career, fitness, and personal connections. In a general sense, it's really the question as to which direction my life is headed next. Sound familiar? Yeah, we all struggle with the same damn things.

I know this is kind of a lackluster post thus far, so I'm throwing in a photo to wake you up. One of the things that is pushing me off this plateau is my fitness level. The monotony of my workout routines has set in so I've been challenging myself more. I started this last summer, but didn't get as far as I wanted to. With decent weather, I've ramped up my schedule by getting out of the gym (bleh) and into the fresh air of Spring (yay!), finally burning off the winter pounds, and then some, over the past several weeks. Although I like to be diverse, one thing I'm really getting into is trail running. I started in North Carolina after I turned my life upside down in 2004, but didn't do it much in Montana. In the past year, after tiring of the normal road and paved-trail doldrums, I've gotten more into it and Chattanooga has some great trails; Raccoon Mountain seems to be my new best friend. After photographing it last year, I signed up for the 11 mile version of the Rock/Creek StumpJump that's happening in October; I don't think I'll be ready for the 50K for a while. Why trail running you ask? Well, because I've found I actually like running; it is my meditation, and sometimes my medication. In fact, unless I'm taking pictures or hiking with someone else, now I feel guilty or like I'm being a little lazy if I'm not running on a trail. Really, though, any exercise is my way to unplug and if I don't get it, I get cranky. Being healthy and fit is a huge motivation for me and spills over into the rest of my life. Running is also cheap; I have no funds to buy expensive cycling, boating, or rock climbing gear. By the way, if anybody has a spare stand-up paddle board or flat water kayak laying around that they want to sell, I'm definitely interested.

On a more emotional level...as anyone who knows me can tell you, I do exceptionally well going through life solo. It really doesn't slow me down much to go and do things on my own, experience new places. The thing is, when I find someone who makes sense and it feels even better when they're around, which is a rarity and highly valued, I get excited. That's what happened to me over the last few weeks. (And, much to the amazement of myself and others, I know I'm ready to share my adventures with someone, the highs and lows, and bring some extra happiness into theirs. People, don't freak out. It's still Jaimie talking and, no, I didn't fall down in the woods and bump my head; I'm not referring to marriage or kids.) Unfortunately, I got an unexpected wake-up call this week that figuratively bitch-slapped and drop-kicked me to the curb. It stung a little at first, then it felt like I had stirred up a hornets nest with a baseball bat, naked. I think the abruptness is the hardest to deal with. I'm very picky about who I let into my circle of trust and I believed everything I heard and experienced could be taken seriously. I can't say I didn't have reservations at the beginning about getting attached, but every stage felt natural and not forced and I started to forget about the risk of it lasting only a moment. I couldn't have guessed I'd be part of the spring cleaning process. Perhaps when I decide to go for something, sometimes I go too big. I don't mind taking a chance if I think the person is worthwhile, but if I'm betting on a race, it's good to know the horse is facing the wrong direction in the starting gate.

I'm sure there is probably more than one man reading this who is just ever-so-slightly satisfied to see me wiping the dirt off my ass. The Great Leaver has been left, at the start of one of the few times where the thought of me backing out hadn't even crossed my mind. Not that I feel I deserved it, but I suppose I was due. Besides, I can only respect someone for doing what they feel is the right thing for themselves in any situation because that's how I live my life and consistently do the same. I promised myself I would never settle for someone again and I never want anyone to be with me if they feel I'm not "enough." It was a short, intense, inspiring, and very happy time and I'm better for the experience. And, truth be told, he raised the bar. (Great. As if I didn't have a hard enough time finding a partner already.) I don't know how to counteract the feeling of leaving myself totally exposed and vulnerable and getting kicked in the stomach other than, after throwing up a bit, letting myself stay open and unguarded because I don't want to live behind a cold, lonely stone fort. I want to run through the grassy field with my hair blowing in the breeze, laughing, sweating, falling down, getting back up and laughing again. That's not to say I'm not going to be cautious about who I let get close to me, but if there is too much caution it's almost impossible to progress.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the whole thing. Sleeping has been restless and limited and I had to take a couple of days off of work. I feel sick. I gave myself a small ego boost by getting my hair trimmed (looks much better and the curl is back :D) and I turned to the two things that make me happiest: nature (and being active in it) and photography. I went into the mountains and I got high. Literally. I didn't smoke, snort, swallow, or drink anything. No, I jumped, bounced, spun around in circles, laid in the sun on a big rock, and acted like an 8 yr old to occupy my mind as much as possible; I photographed as much as I could. I kind of felt like I was in one of those Hanes commercials at one point. I wonder what the few people who drove/walked/cycled by thought about my antics. I'm sure at least one said to themselves, "That girl is kinda crazy." But there's good crazy and bad crazy, and, like I've said before, I'm pretty sure I'm crazy good. If anyone happens to see me in a YouTube video, let me know. With that in mind, I'm sharing the photos below. Since I got my first digital camera, I've been the queen of self-portraits, although mine aren't nearly as stylized as Athena, the only other person I know who takes as many as I do. I think self reflection is good to a point. The rest of the time you just have to live. So, this is me, nothing to hide and not much to defend myself except for the head on my shoulders. This is proudly, beautifully, imperfectly, strongly, vulnerably, amazingly, ridiculously, ME.

The problem with self portraits is that you can't always see where you're at, so my head missed the frame...does that mean I'm pretty much defenseless here or is my head just stuck in the clouds? I actually like this one and sometimes I feel like this would be the easiest way to turn my brain off. I've gotten much better at leading with my heart and letting my brain take care of the logistics, though.

Seriously, thanks for sticking it out all the way to the bottom. (And, yes, it's okay if you're only down here because you skipped the writing and went straight for the pics.) Sometimes I need to put things out into the world, and sometimes I just need to vent. So now I've done both. I may be strong and bounce back pretty fast, but when I let something in, it still feels empty when it's gone. I wish all my closest friends and family weren't so far away because I really need a hug. Most of the love and juicy goodness is still here, though, and more will be found.

Winter Update

2011-01-11T16:25:00.012-05:00

Winter holiday was a day at the beach this year. Literally. It was needed; CA Highway 1 w/ my mom + sis. Besides salt air, the best thing going for San Fran is the food. I eat as much ethnically diverse food as possible and it still never seems to be enough. Same goes w/ time spent at the beach...gimme more, gimme more. My car broke down on the way to the airport, but fortunately I found a ride in time to make my flight. New Years passed quietly w/o a ride to get me out of Chatt-town, and if I was going to go big, it was going to have to be somewhere else.

I've been enjoying an extended weekend due to snow in The South; I'm up to about a gallon a day of coffee or hot tea. It's actually come as much-needed time off for a little personal business + continuation of my attempt to play catch-up w/ other areas of my life. I started a couple of weeks ago over winter vacation...5 days home alone w/o a car causes epic motivation to prevent cabin fever. Almost two weeks later and still no car. Maybe tomorrow? The bike did enough to get me to work and groceries, but it's a long trip over these Tenn hills. Do you know that place the old timers talk about, uphill both ways? Yeah, that's where I live. Admittedly, though, it was a great way to get back into shape after the holidays...my thighs thank me. Well, they did until I bought a (small) box of triple chocolate cookies before the snowstorm hit and ate every last one in two days' time. Like I said, it was a small box and anyone who says you shouldn't reward yourself w/ food after a long week is a damn fool. Fortunately, I don't have those issues and I workout regularly.

Productivity has been my theme on all these extra days off. I unpacked boxes that have been sealed up for over five years. Yeah, cleaning out the closet, in all aspects, can feel really good. I put updated photos in old picture frames, reorganized, and even rested a minute or two. Experiencing old memories, making a giveaway box, recycling pounds and pounds of paper that is now useless to me. I finished burning every CD I've ever owned to a hard drive - a project that started 4 years ago - and have them ready to sell. Oh, man, do those old '90s tunes take me back.... All this time alone, (thankfully) w/o a TV or other brain-draining distractions, also leads to a lot of self refection and the kind of "where am I at, where am I going" conversations between me, myself, + whatever inspiration I stumble upon on the internet any given day. It's so easy to get into pointless comparisons between where I am in life vs. where others are and/or what they've accomplished by such-and-such age. Whenever I start to go there, I have to remind myself that it's a waste of time. Are there things I haven't done that I kick myself in the ass over? Absolutely. Is there still time? You betcha, if death doesn't find me first. Do I have regrets? Very few (and even after the passing of a 10 year anniversary, hopefully you ~CB~ know who you are and I'm sorry and I love you). Do I seem to be headed in the right direction? Pretty much. I do like to reevaluate every now and then, though, and think about what's working, what's not working, what gets me excited, who bums me out, where the web needs to attach next, what connections need to be untied.

It's funny, b/c I'm usually kind of in a creative lull mid winter, but this season has been the opposite. Maybe it's the pressure of the poverty I exist (persist) in, even with a full-time job, that makes me continuously think about new alleys to expand into. My lack of funds led to handmade crafts for the coworkers and is helping prepare me for an online

store featuring those functional baubles and, of course, my photos. There are so many things turning inside my head that I want to do, want to use my art + creative skills for; it's almost a hindrance. Where do I start? All those non-profits and world-saving orgs that I try to keep track of and want to help w/ my talents + passions are ready and waiting; the spinning in place can only go on for so long.

It's hard to look at my life and think about things I'm struggling w/ at any given moment. I know I've got it good. I could be a stupid kid in the middle of some foreign desert, fighting a war that doesn't make any sense. Or watching my life get washed away in some ridiculous flood. Or sleeping in a cardboard box (of which I'm not so far away...thank you family). Or getting shot in the head in a grocery store parking lot. The only advice I can offer is this quote from Churchill. I'm thankful to be sleeping comfortably and able to dream about what I can create and accomplish tomorrow, and about making out w/ John Mayer. I can't help it. This photo pops up on my last.fm station and it's just beautiful...and apparently lingers long enough to make it to the never-never lands in my head. He's spoiled, bored with himself, and fucked up in the kind of way I would never want to deal w/ in a relationship, but his talent is off the charts and he says exactly what's on his mind and I doubt you'd ever have to guess where you stand w/ him. I fully appreciate that in a person. So I can deal w/ him in a fantasy world. Unfortunately, and even though there was no work b/c of the snow, my alarm went off at 7am this morning in mid dream. Maybe I'll see ya later, Johnny.

*All photos are by me except for the John Mayer one, which I yanked off the web.

Main x 24

2010-12-07T21:02:00.002-05:00

Some photos from the recent Main Event on historic Main Street in Chattanooga. The area is a revitalization work-in-progress. Some great things happening down there...

Music + Coffee at the Camp House

Billy Weeks' photo gallery at The Harrington Bldg

In case you forgot..

Busking (Street Entertainment)

Man pretending to be a statue

Child's play at the chili cookoff

I'm only sad that I missed the pancake breakfast :(

Love Me Two Times

2010-11-10T18:32:00.000-05:00

So, I fell in love twice this week. Yesterday, whilst killing time and waiting to meet up with a friend after they finished work, I found the pair of KangaRoos that I've been internet stalking for about 4 months now, on sale for $9. (Everyone knows I shouldn't be left alone for too long in a shopping area b/c I'm bound to find a shoe store.) They only had two pairs left, one in my size and one in a size 11....couldn't have even begun to fake being able to fit into that. It wasn't the ocean blue I've been crooning for, but I'm kind of digging the persimmon color, and it's loudness. Helllooooo again 1980's! They even have the zippered/velcro pouch for stashing all my valuables. Who remembered the 80's had such stylish shoes? I mostly picture white spiked heels, Reebok high tops, and jellies.

*Odd that my shoe/sock combo matches my backdoor rug.

My second trip down lovers lane came while I was taking a left exit off the interstate and back into Chattanooga today. There he stood, directly in front of me, waiting to cross the road w/ something long and heavy balanced on one shoulder. I saw him, he saw me do a double-take, and we both smiled. For 10 more seconds the world was magical, until another car cut me off. Fortunately, I was still in drooly bliss-land and couldn't be bothered to honk or grumble. What is it about a man in dirty clothes, showing off his stellar physique from manual labor, that makes my heart pitter-patter? Oh, that's right, sex appeal and animal magnetism. Sometimes I forget. I wonder if he's working tomorroww.....

'Nooga Night Lights

2010-09-28T19:50:00.003-04:00

These are a collection of photos from around the downtown Chattanooga area that I've accumulated over the last several months.

Skyline

Opposite to the Skyline

Market Street Bridge

Glass Bridge to Hunter Museum

Riverbend Music Festival

Tennessee Aquarium; Tennessee River

Coolidge Park + Merry-Go-Round

There you go, that's my 'hood. In the dark.

Mini Vaca

2010-08-21T17:34:00.003-04:00

I just got back from a four day whirlwind tour of the deep south. I have to say that, besides the lack of sleep, it was just what the doctor ordered. Super fun. Here's a quick recap: restocking at Trader Joe's via Atlanta (yum!), visit with the family, Pensacola Beach, French Quarter, car camping, hike through Jean Lafitte swamp, car camping, snuck into the campsite pool after hours (I will deny this later if asked), transported about 2,045 ants illegally across state lines (how did so many sneak into my car overnight? - pool karma catching up with me), DeSota State Park in N Alabama, home again. Great travel mates, chocolate cat cookies from TJ's, and yet another adventure to add to the already awesome collection. How do I manage this fantastic voyage?

Pensacola beach - no oil, just a little seaweed.

New Orleans at night.

My New Zealand mate, and cover model.

Partied out already?

The bayou.

Golden silk orb-weaver. She's about the size of my hand and she eats her mate. Non-poisonous, but I'd freak if she was crawling up my leg.

Animal path through the swamp.

Six foot gator, safely below the bridge, waiting for us to drop some lunch down.