The Via Colony

Things That Are Saving My Life Right Now - Fall 2025

2025-10-20T13:59:00.006-04:00

***For a recap of where the idea of these posts originated

you can click HERE to get caught up***

1 - The Gift of Noticing - Instead of crafting a list of New Year's resolutions like I used to, or even coming up with a word for the year, over time I have begun having a word that is specifically for a season. I naturally think of life in seasons anyway, so having a word that grounds me in whatever season I am in has been so helpful. My word for the past few months has been, "notice". With my kids growing older and bigger and even sending one far away, I don't want to miss those little things. But in order not to miss them I first have to notice them! So I think this is where my current word originated. But it isn't just with my kids. I want to be present enough to notice the sunlight flickering in the dancing brown pine needles right before they are dry enough to fall off the tree. I want to notice a sound and stop long enough to at least ponder what is making it. To crunch the loudest leaves on the trail or stop to look at the massive bug on the sidewalk. I want to move slowly and deliberately to take in as much as I possibly can. This practice of noticing has a natural way of slowing me down. We live in such a beautiful world. There is no need to rush through it.

2 - Garmin Watch - A few months ago Josh snagged an amazing deal and gifted me a Garmin Watch so we could train together for a race we are doing in November. I had no idea how much of a game changer it would be. I have been able to train with my heart rate in mind and see certain patterns in things that drain me in my day-to-day that have helped make sense of some health issues. It's been fun to track the progress and learn the runner's math that goes along with different training methods.

3 - Magnesium - One of the HUGE things I noticed with my watch is that it was showing me how poorly I was sleeping. My body was not relaxing enough or releasing the stresses of the day (or years!) long enough for me to recharge for the next day. I was just getting more and more depleted. When I was sick a few years ago one of the things I took was Magnesium. I already put magnesium cream on the bottoms of my feet and on my spine to help with the restless legs and body, but felt like maybe a better, internal dose would help my body relax enough to get the deep sleep my body needed. Ya'll, it has been a night and day difference! I am sleeping all night. I am getting through all my sleep cycles. My body isn't nearly as tense. And I am finally giving my body what it needs to recharge for another day. I am SO stoked that it is working!

4 - Friend Time - Before Rainy moved out we would have "friend time". She'd come in late from work, start her bedtime routine, plop on our bed and say "Hey friends". Sometimes she would just be super chatty and silly. Other times she would need some direct questions to get her talking about something that was on her mind. Sometimes she would just lay there until she absolutely HAD to get up and go to bed as Josh and I drifted off to sleep ourselves. But then she moved...*sigh*. Friend time looks different now, but thanks to FaceTime we still get to have it. Those precious calls from Rain have been just what we need as we continue the daily release of our firstborn into the world.

5 - A Training Plan - Ya'll, I've been working out the same way for YEARS. But then Josh signed me up for this Spartan Beast and emailed me a 12 week plan and it has been so fun to do something different. I haven't felt this good and this motivated in a while and to train with my best friend is my absolute favorite!

6 - Yellow Blanket - I have this autumn-yellow knitted blanket that I bought last year (or maybe two years ago?) at TJMaxx. There is something about how it feels to the touch. And I know this list is heavy on activity/workout information, but after so much jumping and running my bare feet love being wrapped up in this soft blanket. Sometimes I can't wait to get home, get all cleaned up, and wiggle my toes around in the soft yarn. I guess this sixth thing could actually go under my "notice" category.

7 - The "We Do Not Care" Movement - I actually don't follow people I don't really know or have a direct connection with on Instagram. Ok, after looking back through who I follow there are about five. But I could not help myself with this one lady who began the "We Do Not Care" movement. It is HILARIOUS! I introduced Josh to it last night because one came up in my feed and even he thought it was funny (probably because I fit the category that the posts are aimed at and HE has seen this shift first-hand in me, lol). The older I get the less I care about the micro-management of most everything in life and this follow gives me a good laugh.

8 - Open Intersection - Last June, as in the June of 2024, the intersection up the road closed down. It was supposed to be a "quick" 6-8 week closure to get the work done that they needed to. Now, this is the road that makes heading to pretty much EVERYWHERE for us easier. The kid's school is straight up ahead, the grocery store is just around the corner, and the road leading to most of our lives is so much quicker when we can take a right out of our driveway instead of the left, which leads to 25 mph roads for eternity and zig-zagging through tiny neighborhoods, getting blocked in even MORE traffic from MORE construction in every direction we go. Well, two weeks ago, (1 year and 4 months after closing...but who's counting) it FINALLY reopened! And just like that my life just went from a 10 to a 12 overnight!

9- Reading - At the beginning of this summer I gave my girls the task of finding my summer reading. I was all out of my Christmas List books and was in a bit of a reading slump so I wanted something fun and different. Their first pick was Percy Jackson, obviously. And I tried. I really did. I read the first book but I'm just gonna be honest, I just couldn't get into it. So I asked to try something else. They gave me Six of Crows and I'm loving it. Now, I admit to carrying it around ALL SUMMER LONG in hopes of staring it but it wasn't until just a few weeks ago that I cracked it open and started slowly finding the cracks in my day to fill it with the book. It is nice to be reading again. Something light and interesting but not soul-deep which is what I typically go for. It's nice to be reading again.

10 - Sunsets - This also might fall into the "notice" category. The day after Josh and I got back from our yearly vacation with his family at the lake we were asking ourselves how we can bottle up that energy and bring it back home. How can we still live in the moment while still living our very full lives? So we asked ourselves what that would look like for us. We realized that sunsets are so beautiful on vacation at the lake that most every night we stop what we are doing and go bask in the brilliant colors and peaceful setting. But those same sunsets are here in Rolesville! I mean, we've got dozens of pictures over our 16 years in this home to prove it! But why don't we bask in it here like we do at the lake? At that moment we decided that we are going to stop whatever we are doing, whenever it is at all possible, head outside, and just take a few minutes to watch the sunset. It doesn't always happen, but I think it is one of my favorite new practices.

Things That Are Saving My Life Right Now - Spring 2025

2025-05-15T17:18:00.000-04:00

***I have done a couple of these posts,

so if you are new to this concept make sure you click HERE to

go back and see where the idea originated.***

Sometimes just the act of listing things that fill you up or bring life are just what a weary soul needs. And May can tend to make one weary as we crawl to the finish line of school and sports and crazy schedules. I thought it was time to share a few of the things saving my life right now on my quest to remain grounded in the crazy. These are by no means in any kind of order and some of them may seem trivial to you, but to me they are worth noting and acknowledging.

1 - Staying Home - I am acutely aware of the blessing and privilege that I have had to be able to stay home since becoming a mom over 20 years ago. I never imagined being a homeschool mom but here I am teaching Algebra, relearning how to diagram sentences, reading History and implementing life-skills on the daily. I can't say it's all been sunshine and roses (can next May get here already?!), but I am SO grateful for the opportunity. I have found how to hold space for gratitude while simultaneously being completely over it, lol! I think I've been thinking about it so much because my homeschooling season is coming to a close so soon with Jude tying a bow on this era next year after he completes eighth grade with me. I've caught myself daydreaming about what I want to dedicate my time to after all my kids are either graduated or in public school. Where do I want to work? What does God have next for me? These questions don't bring panic or overwhelm, but excitement about what lays ahead for me.

2 - Block Out Times - Speaking of homeschool...I found myself getting so frustrated at Jude on mornings that I felt like my attention was divided. Whether it was because I had an early morning appointment with a kid or just a ton of things piling up on my to-do-list. I would be scurrying around doing all the things while Jude, the student I was supposed to be teaching, was left with unanswered questions and an inattentive teacher with her mind elsewhere. As I evaluated the situation I decided first of all that I owed Jude an apology. It wasn't his fault that I had to take Alethia to the orthodontist, or Zeke to the DMV or scheduled too many things in my day. Yes, the orthodontist needed to be a priority, the DMV unfortunately has to happen (I think I will celebrate the last time I have to enter the nightmare called the NC DMV due to teen driving protocols), and the things on my to-do list still need to get done, but NOT during school. I decided that I am going to treat school time as an item on my calendar and I'm not allowed to overbook. That's it. Now, life sometimes doesn't work like that, but overall, for what I can control, I say no to all appointments and outside responsibilities until school is done for the day and it has made a world of difference on our school days.

3 - Off The Socials - I gave up social media for Lent this year and have hardly had a desire to go back. Besides the occasional need to look something or someone up or just to check in I haven't signed on. I find it so freeing not to have to know everything and respond to it all. I talk to my people and stay connected through word of mouth (or text) and that has been so great! No, I haven't deleted my accounts but don't get offended if I don't respond back to a message in any timely manner. If you know my number or address you know where to find me.

4 - Six Month Rule - I am a get-rid-of-stuff kind of girl. I periodically go through bins, drawers, cabinets, dressers and baskets throughout the year, which alone has ALWAYS been something that saves me life, but sometimes it's hard to know whether to get rid of something or not. Years ago I heard about this one hack that truly saves my life, with clothes (or smaller items) especially. If I'm going through my closet or a bin, I for sure have some obvious things for the "keep" pile or "get-rid-of-it" pile. But what about those things that you are on the fence about? What I do is grab a trash bag from the kitchen and unashamedly fill it with those questionable items and stick it in my attic for 6 months. During those six months, if I have wondered where the thing went or I actually wanted to wear or use it I'll take it back out and and keep it. And the rest of the stuff in the bag? It no longer gets to take up precious realty in my home and it finds a new home.

5 - Garden Door - All I asked for for Mother's Day was a door for my garden. Josh made me one several years about but it grew weary over time and needed to be replaced. So this year, he got me a new one! He went to the antique store up the road and found me an old door and sized it for the garden and it literally makes me smile EVERY time I look out at it. I love it so much!

6 - Tuesday Miles - Tuesdays have become one of my favorite days. We typically go to my parent's house for school and they live in a great neighborhood for walking/jogging. I don't put any expectations on myself except to just move. Some days I fill my head with the latest podcasts in my feed and other days I will walk or jog in silence, with only my own thoughts keeping me company. I will get anywhere from 3-5 miles in. Then Cai has soccer practice near the greenway in the evening. Instead of just dropping him off I'll stick around and walk or jog some more. Last week I tracked a half marathon between the two and I felt so accomplished. It has been slow going to working my way back up to distance since I was sick in 2020, so this has been a great way to stretch myself. Plus I sleep great on Tuesday nights!

7 - 1825 - Josh and I took over our college ministry a few months ago and I have really loved getting to know these young adults. They are eager to dig deep and not afraid to ask questions. I just remember those years in my own life and the people God placed in my life to help me navigate life as I began adulting and I am so honored to be able to fill that gap for these kids.

8 - Save For Later - A few years ago I started taking advantage of the "save for later" Amazon feature. Actually, I used to just have a paper titled "Want But Not Yet" before Amazon's save for later. Instead of just thinking I need something right when I hear about it I can find it and stick it in the "save for later" cart. Not only does it help me not spend so much money, it is an automatic, ongoing Christmas or birthday list. It specifically makes my "saving my life" list because once I find it and put it on the list I can mentally release it. I don't have to feel like I need to keep it in the front of my mind anymore, especially if it is something I need after we get paid again or budget for it. Once I've put it on that list I know it will just sit there waiting for me if and when the time is appropriate to get it.

Merry Christmas From The Via Colony

2024-12-19T17:49:00.001-05:00

What a year! We aren't doing a Christmas card this year so I decided I'd do a little recap of our year, our kids and a few highlights of this past year with links to some of the memories I actually posted about throughout the year.

Our oldest was in her element this year, flying high as an aerial instructor (among other things) at a circus arts studio downtown. She has since shifted her employment this past month but continues her connection with her relationships and classes at the studio. I have seen this girl mature and grow and go through some really tough things as a 19-year-old. I've learned a lot from her as I've watched her navigate her waltz into adulthood. She dove in head-first and isn't stopping. She has so many hopes and dreams for this next season of her life.

Our next kiddo is still plugging along in his pursuit of a career in cinematography and videography. He has had some really cool opportunities this year and I've really seen him take initiative as he tries to figure out how his own tip-toe into adulting. He is also an avid gym bro and takes his fitness seriously.

Our middle kid began public high school this year and is LOVING it! I know she was nervous but she is rocking life right now. She works hard in school, she works hard to foster healthy relationships and she is really maturing into such a fun girl to be around.

Next up is our other high schooler. He is always on the go with soccer, cross country, friends, practical jokes and whatever else he can find to keep himself busy. He does have a sensitive side, but man he's funny.

Last but not least is our youngest. He is still at home with me plugging away at middle school. He has a little side hustle around our small town helping mostly elderly people and widows with some small tasks they need assistance with. He has used his money to pursue his love of hockey. He just passed his learn to skate prerequisite and is signed up for his learn to play class. It is the next step of his dream of actually being able to play on some kind of rec hockey team soon.

Josh and I are hanging in there with (nearly) 5 teenagers. We are trying to adjust to the unpredictability of life with kids who have their own plans and vehicles and agendas. Life looks SO different, but when we get those glimpses of our kids, truly happy, embracing their relationships as their greatest wealth, those moments when they aren't too afraid to fail forward and try new things or go in different directions, we feel so full.

Wow, we did a lot this year.

Josh and Jude went to Guatemala

Josh and I got to help lead worship at United

Our church, Seven Marks Church, released a couple new songs this year The Greatest Victory and No Shadow of Turning

Josh ran a trail marathon and Cai CUT HIS HAIR!

Rainy competed in her first aerial competition

Twenty Two years of marriage celebrated

A trip to visit our Global Partners in Honduras

Spartan Super with my boo

Cai and all his sports

Alethia's Sweet 16

But the biggest memory of the year was our roadtrip to Colorado! You can follow this link and work your way through our trip. It was a BLAST!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From our family to yours, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I hope this season brings you closer to the peace and joy of our great God and the sacrifice of his son, Jesus Christ.

December - It's All About Christmas Festivities

2024-12-19T16:46:00.001-05:00

Well, we began December the way we always do around here in this part of Raleigh, NC with our small town Christmas Parade!

And then JINGLE JAM! I only took a picture of Rainy's hair because I was pretty proud of myself for how it turned out. She was performing on her silk as part of Jingle Jam so she needed to get that hair done up.

The rest of the month was full of friends in and out of our home for game nights, movie nights, sleepovers and eating up everything in our pantry. These are my favorite moments.

Josh has wanted a nativity scene in our front yard for YEARS. So this year I gave him one as an early Christmas present. You should have seen him getting the yard all decorated. He was actually frolicking around. I'm pretty sure one of the kids has a video;)

I caught a rare sighting of Cai...not moving, talking, joking around...but sleeping! He fell asleep on the way to my parents house after a long week.

Here is Cai's creativity at its best. He made a Christmas countdown for Jude. Every day when Cai walks in from school he and Jude collectively shout out what day Jude gets to open to get his daily prize. It's super cute.

We are closing out the year with some very important life lessons. Josh taught Zeke how to change his own oil!

Alethia's Sweet 16

2024-12-19T16:38:00.001-05:00

Our sweet Alethia turned 16 this year! She decided she wanted a fun party kind of like Rainy's. She created a beautiful invite, sent it to some of her favorite people and we had the best time dancing and celebrating. Of course I don't have many pictures, but I snapped a few of Josh and the grandmas sharing sweet words, Rainy's cake for Alethia, and a couple others.

November

2024-12-19T16:32:00.005-05:00

I wanted to get a couple of quick monthly recaps up before the end of the year!

The kids began their November with the student fall retreat. I love the sweet relationships they have been able to cultivate in our student ministry.

Josh officiated his cousin's wedding up near Richmond, VA so we got to spend a couple some quality time with his parents and mom's siblings which has NEVER happened! I wish I had more pictures. But these will have to do. It was a beautiful ceremony. COLD, but so beautiful.

Josh has officially been blessed with enough freebie tickets to take each of his kids to Cameron Stadium to watch a Duke Men's Basketball game. Jude has been waiting patiently and his time finally came!

Alethia had a fun birthday party for a friend and I'm so glad the mama shared this photo!

And we can't forget Thanksgiving! It was the Via's year so we drove up to Josh's parents house, with two extra little loves in tow. Evie LOVED helping Meme get ready for our Thanksgiving feast. And then the next day our kids got to help begin Christmas decorating, along with some other cousins.

October - Homecoming and Life

2024-11-05T18:26:00.001-05:00

Fall has been BEAUTIFUL this year! The colors, the coming and going (Josh was gone the majority of this month on retreats and a mission trip to Argentina), the fun happenings at school like HOMECOMING...it was a great, FULL month.

Alethia has really thrived at public high school. She's even gotten Cai to come out of his shell a little bit with football games and other fun activities. I started logging some hours behind the wheel with Cai, the Northern lights came through our region and Halloween is still a thing around here. And finally, Jude and I began a couch to 5k program for PE this year which has been really fun to do together.

A New Song In The Queue

2024-11-05T18:16:00.005-05:00

Josh, Krysteah and the team created yet another song that I CANNOT wait for you to hear. We took another trip to the music magician's studio, AKA Diamond Studios with our buddy Travis and laid down the vocals and violin tracks, then came back and gathered the troops for gang vocals. I'll let you know when it drops.

September - Vacation and The Long-Awaited Routine

2024-11-05T18:04:00.001-05:00

Via Vacation was a bit different this year. Instead of our Lake Anna house we have gone to for about a decade we made our way to the beach. Lake Anna had an outbreak of bacteria in the water, sending many people to the hospital, resulting in the lake being shut down. Even though it opened up shortly before vacation we played it safe and found another place to go. It was great to be together, of course, and the beach is also so relaxing to walk, sit, play or just watch as the waves roll in.

The rest of the month was spent getting into a welcomed rhythm of routine and life.

The student worship team began this semester

Jude worked hard and got all the necessary gear to begin ice skating lessons and open stick and puck.

Jude and Josh also began a small group called First Tribe with a group of preteens/young teens and dads as they walk through this next stage of life together. I love the bond they are creating during their monthly meetings.

Sports, Sports, Sports

2024-11-05T16:58:00.005-05:00

We spent our late summer on through to the fall watching Cai excel on the field, both for soccer and cross country.

He had a new soccer coach this year which we sure didn't mind. Over 80 boys tried out so we were super excited that he made the JV team. He started most games and played in every game. He even scored 2 goals! We are so proud of his perseverance and hard work.

The cross country coach approached Cai and asked if he'd come run for their team as well. He had already cleared it with the soccer coach, and as long as it didn't interfere with the soccer season he was free to join practices and meets with he cross country team. He found a community he loved and another sport he is really good at! He began the season PRing nearly every early meet. By the end of the season his time made hime eligible for regionals and he came in second on his team! His PR for the 5K is 20.0006 min.

When Poppee came in a few weeks ago he started showing Cai some wrestling moves and is trying to talk him into trying out for that team...we shall see, ha!

The Little Visitors

2024-11-05T16:39:00.002-05:00

Josh's sister and husband reached out to us to see if we could host their 4 littles for a week and of course we said yes! It was such a full week of activity! The boys literally didn't stop the entire week. I'm just gonna photo dump the week because I feel that adequately describes the vibe from the whole week.

The boys (Cai) created some elaborate game that occupied their time. Don't ask me how to play, just enjoy the pictures of them having a blast!

August - Saying Goodbye To Summer

2024-11-05T15:15:00.004-05:00

We celebrated Cai's 15th birthday. Birthday tradition gets them a breakfast with dad wherever they choose and often Krispy Kreme is the one.

This also meant Cai was able to get his permit. We now have our official

4th teenage driver in the colony house.

Alethia is starting to get practice in pumping gas.

Our beloved Fluffy died in August. Our 9 year old chicken! We even saw the culprit! It was a hawk. He actually took out a couple of chickens before we were able to fully close in the ladies. But since we covered them up they have stayed safe and sound.

Rainy had a gig down in Myrtle Beach and took Zeke with her to grab some footage.

I love that they love spending time together.

Jude, forever creating in the kitchen.

Zeke has really surprised us with his dedication to learning guitar. He now plays on the student worship team and practices for hours to perfect his parts. We love this creative outlet for him.

The kids finally started school the last week of August.

Cai headed back to Rolesville High and took Alethia with him this year!

Jude is home in 7th and Zeke is home finishing up his senior year.

The Rest Of July

2024-11-05T14:50:00.003-05:00

After our Colorado trip our summer did NOT slow down. Cai had a singular day at home before heading off to soccer camp with his school. The girls asked me to tag along with them to see Sam Hunt. It is so fun to watch the girls get so into their concerts, lol.

Zeke jumped on a mission trip to Brazil, and boy did those Brazilian girls like him and his cousins!

And Jude finally got his birthday outing with friends. He chose to go ice skating, since he is all into ice hockey right now. It was so cute. He had the whole day planned out with outdoor games and snacks and everything. He is turning into quite the host.

Speaking of hockey. It is an extremely expensive sport and there are a LOT of steps to even get to the team part. So Jude went and surveyed a couple of the nearby neighborhoods, created a flyer to hire himself out for any odd jobs that people may need him for, to raise money for this deep love he has acquired to play hockey. He got a couple of call backs from a couple widows that just need some young bones and strong muscles and he is working his way into the hockey scene.

Things That Are Saving My Life Right Now

2024-09-30T14:05:00.002-04:00

I did one of these posts back in May. A post dedicated to a select few things recently that have really stepped in to save my life! Here are my go-to's the last few months.

1-Sudoku - This summer was F.U.L.L. So full that I found it absolutely necessary to quiet as much noise around me as possible. Reading was hard. It's always been hard for me to read when people are around. Voices and movement can be super distracting and that can (not always) lead to frustration because I keep having to re-read things. I was also finding it hard for my brain to stay focused. After coming off of a busy season and stepping into summer, and all that comes with that, I decided I was going to give myself permission to just be. But I also like to be "doing" something and I found the PERFECT thing!

Solving things + Numbers = Life Giving

Sudoku has been SO fun! I can jump in a game and be interrupted without feeling like I have to spend 20 minutes to get back in the zone. It has nothing to do with technology. I can be present with my family while also keeping my brain active and sharp, and also giving my hands something to do while just hanging out.

2-White Out - We make plans, then the times change, they get cancelled, then rescheduled, then completely moved to another month... I could just write in my calendar with a pencil, but I don't trust that. I could also just cross things out, but when my the little daily white squares on my calendar begin to get cluttered with changed plans being crossed out everywhere my anxiety starts to rise. Enter in this little gem. I can't even count the amount of times I've used this little guy on my homeschool plans or my calendar and IT.MAKES.MY.HEART.SO.HAPPY. It's like a fresh start every times something changes instead of the potential chaotic mess it not only looks like, but actually becomes! Go get you one of these and I promise you won't be disappointed.

3-Juice and Toya - Working out has been sporadic the past few months in between travel and extra littles running around, but I can always count on Juice and Toya to give me a good HIT. Josh and I love to do these workouts together. I mean, we get to work out with another J and T, husband/wife team! Here's the workout I knocked out this morning! Go check them out on YouTube.

4-Puzzles - When we were keeping Josh's sister's kids for a week in August they came with a 300 piece puzzle that the boys would put together, take apart and put together again, over and over. We went to our puzzle arsenal after they left but only had a couple of 1000 piece puzzles, which can be a bit too much for a quick weekend puzzle, so I headed to amazon to pick out a couple 500 and 750 piece puzzles which seemed much more attainable. I love looking over and seeing which of the kids (or adults) gravitate toward the pieces throughout the days.

5-Sabbath Candle - I started using a taper candle on Sabbath. There's just something about finishing the prep of grocery lists, laundry and cleaning chores on Friday morning and then walking over to the table to light the candle to enter into sabbath that is so life-giving to me. As the day goes on I catch myself glancing over at the flickering light, remembering this day as set apart. It also reminds me that I can trust God to still be alive and active even when I am not.

That's it. The things that are saving my life right now. Nothing earth-shattering, just things that keep me centered.

Why Does Nobody Ever Talk About This?

2024-08-27T08:54:00.001-04:00

I'm going to share a pet peeve of mine. It really bothers me when I hear someone talk about something that they are beginning to experience for the first time and say, "why does nobody ever talk about this?"

We live in what I believe to be one of the most vocal eras of all time. There are SO many voices and words and resources that it is actually nearly impossible to honestly say "nobody ever talks about" ANYTHING.

I was listening to a women's hormone podcast, I know, riveting. The podcaster was recounting a conversation she had with a friend and they were discussing how "nobody ever talks about menopause." And I thought to myself, "I have literally heard the older generation talk about hot flashes and diminishing periods and raging emotions and hormones in older adulthood my entire life". Now, I never really thought too much about it, I just knew it was coming. But because it didn't really pertain to the season of life I was in it was just background noise. Something I recognized but didn't need to deeply take in at the time. But it was there.

I also heard someone say (actually lots of someones, as surprising as it may be) "why does nobody ever talk about how hard it is to raise teenagers?" This one really threw me off. Maybe it's because I was one of those "hard to raise teenagers" and have been waiting for my turn to parent kids like myself since I WAS that teen. Or maybe because I saw my emotionally exhausted mom quietly talking across the room to other teary moms as they waded through the trenches of parenting teenagers together.

But what about when I went through my ectopic pregnancy that could have taken my life, or the adoption holdups in another country? I had never HEARD of an ectopic pregnancy or some of the specifics of what we went through in our adoption. But that doesn't mean they were or are never talked about.

Here is what I have found to be true:

When something isn't on our radar because life experiences haven't taken us in that particular direction yet, it DOES seem new and unknown. But it's because we haven't NEEDED to know the specifics of them. They haven't even been on our radar yet.

You may not have ever paid attention to the older generation of women furiously waving their fans in church to cool themselves off from hot flashes or been in their friend circles as they discuss the woes of menopause, but they've been there. We just haven't needed to know it all yet. But you better believe I am listening intently now as a 45-year-old!

So often the fingers get pointed to the lack of guidance we received as we grew up because "nobody ever told me that". But we weren't meant to know everything yet. Our brains (and emotions) would have never been able to handle it all. Sometimes we need to learn as we go and that is what opens the door to what people who have gone before us have already been talking about.

Whenever I am tempted to fall into the, "why doesn't anybody ever talk about this" mentality I use it to remind myself to pause, take a step back and listen. Whether I am seeing something from far off and diving deeper or learning something for the very first time, I can take this pause. Oh there is talking alright. We just have to become good listeners and be gracious for the things we are just now learning.

Cereal Isn't A Bad Word

2024-08-24T16:14:00.002-04:00

I have a confession to make.

I don't make breakfast for my kids.

Nope.

I actually haven't since back in the day when I used to puree my own baby food for them.

But I do buy cereal.

Yup, the "c" word designated for us "lazy mom's" who don't have the capacity to think about adding one more meal to the daily queue. I mean, it's hard enough knowing these humans want to eat dinner EVERY NIGHT. The nerve. And I still ration the cereal to one bowl a day (because large family probs).

But I don't even feel guilty about it.

I've talked before about how we don't go out to eat hardly at all (because large family probs), so I designate my cooking efforts toward dinners. Plus, I know my capacity and it does not include getting up before the kids do just to get them breakfast. I get up for other reasons, but not to whip up a breakfast casserole or anything.

What I HAVE done is equip them with the skills to make their own breakfast. It could include breakfast burritos, omelets or scrambled eggs. They also have other options like yogurt parfaits, oatmeal, toast or protein smoothies. All of which have been added as they have gotten into their older elementary aged years. But almost always their breakfast includes a bowl of cereal.

And all of these options can be made all.by.themselves.

We've got our three staple cereals to ensure the majority can be consumed by our dairy free and gluten free kids too: Rice Crispies, Honey Nut Cheerios and Frosted Flakes. Nothing super fun so I at least eliminate most of the junk found in boxed cereal.

We keep it simple.

Their bellies get full.

And I don't have to worry about meal planning, prepping and cleaning another meal up before the day even gets started.

So here is my permission to you.

If you continually feel stressed over the breakfast-time rush and all that it entails, go buy a box of cereal, kiss your kids on the forehead and know that you are still a fantastic mama!

Day 15: NC - The Road To Home

2024-07-26T17:19:00.002-04:00

Today was the day we would arrive back home.

We had stayed the night in a sweet little log cabin in Tennessee. It had a downstairs with a small kitchen, living room and bathroom and a loft upstairs with 3 beds. Jude made a pad on the floor (he had the entire King size bed at the Ranch, he's ok.) and the rest of us took the beds. It was such a cute cabin and the hospitality spoke throughout the whole property.

We only had one stop on the itinerary for the day. The stop was one we had been looking forward to the entire trip and had gotten us through to this last day. Something really fun to look forward to, ya know?

But there were two specific things promised to the kids that hadn't happened yet.

We promised if we saw a Buc-ees we would stop. And if you read some of the kids in this photo closely you can see that a couple of them were literally R-U-N-N-I-N-G into the building as soon as we put the car in park. I mean...it's the place to be. Everybody talks about it!

A few observations from this bewildered mom:

1-Those are the nicest bathrooms this world has ever seen.

2-Those workers LOVE their job. Everyone was so cheery. Even for first-thing in the morning. It's a bit concerning.

3-Ya'll, it's a gas station. And I must admit to my skeptical attitude, believing they must really hike up the gas prices since this is such a big attraction. But ya'll, after close inspection (aka, meandering over to the pumps pretending like I belonged there) the gas prices were actually really good.

4-They have chefs ya'll. Actual chefs that sing songs while they chop up their BBQ and candy their walnuts.

5-I would absolutely go back.

"Is it worth the hype" you ask? I mean, it IS the amusement park of gas stations so I'll let you come to your own conclusion. But I will tell you, this stop was one of Alethia's highlights of the whole trip, lol!

It was lunchtime and we were in need of a quick "pit stop" if you know what I mean. Josh found a place to pull over, have a picnic (these would be our last sandwiches from the cooler for a while!), skip rocks and play in the water for a few minutes. The water was runoff from the Smoky Mountains and it was beautiful.

We were SO close to home!

NC here we come!

We finally made it back to North Carolina. This is where our last stop would be. And this is where we finally started seeing signs for Dairy Queen, the other promised stop of this big trip. When I was growing up and we were taking our yearly summer roadtrip to Colorado we could always bank on Dad saying the car was malfunctioning (or taking on a mind of its own) and predictably ending up at a Dairy Queen, as I remember it anyway. So naturally, this was going to have to be a stop our family made. A Butterfinger Blizzard is my childhood wrapped up in one, big, delicious memory. We found a DQ really close to Henry River Mill Village, a ghost town in Hickory, NC where District 12 from the Hunger games was filmed. This was our last stop and we were pumped! As we were nearing the exit for the site we were in the middle of a torrential downpour.

I have to stop and say right now, given the amount of time we were outside and on the road, we had the BEST weather. Even on stormy days, the Lord seemed to part the clouds, even if only for the few minutes we were walking around seeing something. Minus our near-death electrocution by lightning on Day 2 of course.

But since this last thing was outside we decided to take our DQ stop first.

We piled back into the car for our last stop. We arrived to a large metal closed gate with cameras all around, warning us of our impending doom if we were to disobey the rules (which meant we couldn't even sneak inside, boo). Apparently this place is an ACTUAL place with tickets and times and stuff. We got out and took a couple pictures of what we could and, with our tails between our wet legs, we climbed back into the car for the last few hours on the road before we got home.

We recovered from our disappointment quickly and I have put money aside to eventually make it back to this spot, but we couldn't hide that the day seemed a bit anticlimactic.

No major hikes or sites.

No near-death experiences.

(I know, I keep being dramatic.)

No more Airbnbs imagining what it would be like to "live here".

No more mountains and adventures.

Reality and responsibility were just a couple of hours away and we were all feeling it.

But that's how it is, right? You take adventures to experience new things. Things you don't get to experience every day. And how could you? There is so much beauty, so many avenues in life that you couldn't possibly posses it all.

When you live in the mountains you slowly begin to forget about them.

When you take care of cows on a farm they don't make you giddy nearly as much as when you first get to ride out to them and feed the babies.

When you have a Buc-ees in your hometown I bet you won't rush out of the car to go RUN inside.

When the St. Louis Arch is in your backyard I doubt you are just dreaming for a chance to make your way through a 4th of July crowd just to put your own hands on it.

These were special moments.

Memories I hope our kids will always remember.

Experiences we will most likely never call our every day.

But reality and responsibility aren't the other side of the coin.

They are our GET TO.

We GET TO live here, in this home, doing these things God has called us to.

We are in a quest for meaning and purpose and fulfillment the rest of our lives.

And that GETS TO start right here in our humble home, in our every day.

It's so good to be home.

(Last photo by Zeke Via)

Day 14: TN - Memphis - Nashville

2024-07-26T16:15:00.001-04:00

We made it to TENNESSEE!

We didn't have any specific destinations for this day except to walk Beale Street in Memphis and go downtown in Nashville. And we didn't want to feel rushed. The girls especially were excited for this day!

We arrived in Memphis around lunchtime so the streets were still really quiet. Josh decided the kids needed a taste of the world famous Central BBQ. During our year of traveling to help out a church in Memphis, we frequented different BBQ joints and this was one of Josh's favorites. He got some great photos he posted on his Instagram of this day. After eating, we headed to Beale Street to walk the strip.

After Memphis I took over driving and steered us in the direction of Nashville. Let it be known that I navigated the streets of downtown Nashville in our 15 passenger van. I don't even attempt this feat in my own downtown. My girlfriends were very proud, thank you very much.

The crowds were beginning to pick up as we weaved our way in and out of strangers. There were so many sounds! Cars, horns, people, and a different band in every single restaurant or bar. I wonder how you get a decent sound check with all the doors and windows are open and you are competing with every other local band on tap for the night. It was wild!

The Ryman Auditorium

It was getting late and we still had an hour and a half drive to our next Airbnb.

That's when we noticed we had a headlight out...and we needed to make one final stop at the Kroger (because gas points!) for the last day's lunches so we made a couple of stops before arriving at our legit log cabin for the night.

Day 14: The Farm

2024-07-26T15:44:00.003-04:00

This Airbnb on a 300+ acre farm in Arkansas deserved its own post. Mostly because I have too many cow pictures to post. Now, I am aware that not all people love farms and cows and beautiful scenes overlooking the Ozarks, but it's my blog and if you don't like cows you can skip on to the next post.

Since we arrived so late the night before, and this place was epic, we decided to give the kids slow morning to enjoy the atmosphere...and cows.

We got to the house late but the owners said they would wait on us to feed the baby cows. Um, excuse me...baby cows?! You should have seen the look on ~~my face~~ Rainy's face when we told her that! The owners showed up to greet us with an ATV and a 4-wheeler. We hadn't even unpacked the van before piling into these two vehicles and heading to the cow pasture on the property to find the hungry babies and give them dinner. These were two little orphan calves. There are several other babies on the properties that were being taken care of by their mamas.

After feeding the babies we hopped back on our rides and they took us to the crest of their property that overlooks the Ozarks to watch the sun set. Oh my gosh. It was beautiful! Then on to "the cave" which we had to make sure was clear of bats before entering. And then back up to another overlook before heading back to the van to unpack and get comfortable for the night.

This one by far one of Rainy's highlights of the entire trip.

Day 13: OK - AR

2024-07-26T15:27:00.000-04:00

This day started out just fine.

And then we almost died.

Ok, so here is when the truth comes out about the flesh eating bugs I wrote about in the Colorado trip intro. They were actually a type of fly. And they bit. And it hurt really bad. (Or so I'm told) But there weren't just one or two of them. They were everywhere and left the majority of us randomly yelping out and hitting ourselves while jumping and skipping in zigzags the entire hike through Palo Duro Canyon. It really is a stunning place that I remember going as a kid, but as soon as we picked our little 2-mile trail to hike we very quickly realized that it was going to be miserable and that we needed bug spray ASAP. We all ran, flailing our arms, back to the van, generously doused ourselves with bug spray and chose just the 2nd half portion to hike because there was a cave. And cave's are cool.

I actually laugh a little inside because I am the only one that didn't get any bites. NOT ONE. Here is the link to the lotion I lathered on after my shower that morning. I believe this is going to be our new bug deterrent. You're welcome. (And don't make fun of my boys when they walk past you in a hallway and you get a whiff of peony. This stuff literally saved my life.)

Here are a couple of my pictures from the less than enjoyable hike through the stunning rocks and caves of Palo Duro Canyon. Poor Jude has holes all in his crocs and those were his shoes of choice for the hike (life lessons) so he literally hiked the canyon, with actual rocks and cactus, barefoot!

After that unforgettable hike we gladly sealed ourselves safely into our car and headed to our first stop on the day's schedule. On the way I noticed this water tower that looked like it was about to fall over and Josh said he actually saw that on one of his maps and it has a name. Leaning Tower of Britten. Huh...I would like to know who decides which things make it on a map?

And then we arrived at Shamrock, TX.

This little town, with it's Conoco station and U-Drop Inn diner, inspired the little town of Radiator Springs on the movie CARS. It was SO cute! And the older ladies working in the shop were so proud!

You may start to see a theme. Route 66 stuff is EVERYWHERE! It is now Interstate 40 that reaches all across the US, but there are still portions of the old Hwy that run parallel to the Interstate. But just a word of warning, if you veer off to drive on it, getting back to the interstate going the direction you need to go will cost you some valuable time (and possibly add a few gray hairs in the process).

This is me on the old Route 66

Once we eventually got back on track on I-40 we arrived in Oklahoma!

There are multiple Rt. 66 museums but we decided to opt for this one since it was on our way.

We ended our day in the state of Arkansas, eating dinner at Whataburger because the kids HAD to experience this too of course and sleeping at the coolest farm! That is coming next.

Day 12: NM - TX - Cadillac Ranch - Childhood Home

2024-07-26T14:29:00.001-04:00

We said goodbye to Colorado and headed south to take a walk down memory lane to visit the town where I lived. We moved from Ohio (where I was born) when I was 3 years old and moved to Wisconsin after I completed 6th grade. But first we got to check another state off the list as the GPS routed us through New Mexico on our way to Amarillo. We decided that, in order to fully take advantage of this trip we needed two separate routes. We took the northern route to get to CO and the southern route to get back home.

We were schooled in New Mexico's Volcanos because we had no idea!

And then the much-anticipated entry into TEXAS!

Once a Texan always a Texan.

Right before the city limits of Amarillo is a now-famous site called Cadillac Ranch.

Another eccentric creation, but this one has some personal history. I have pictures of me as a kid standing under one of these cars before graffiti was a money-maker, and before the movie CARS (along with other nods to this epic site) put it on the map. I don't remember how old I was but I was invited to go to the home of the sponsor/owner of Cadillac Ranch to play music for an event he was hosting there. It was such an interesting home. When you drove through the gate onto his property he had exotic animals walking around and peacocks everywhere. Inside he had multiple wall maps that you could pull down, animal fur rugs in every room and stools made from actual elephant legs. It was bizarre! Anyway, I've told the kids about this Cadillac Ranch place for years and I was excited to watch them experience it for the first time. Now, it looks NOTHING like it used to when I was a kid (the spray paint acts as glue holding pieces of the old cars together in some places and looks like stalactites dripping off of other pieces), but it was nostalgic none-the-less.

Over the years I guess they said, "if you can't beat 'em, make money off of 'em". They now have a truck that sells spray paint and merchandise. Luckily I knew that so I bought paint before we went so we didn't have to buy the over-priced stuff for the amateurs, ha!

Then we got in the car and I showed my kids the home where I grew up.

Again, nothing like my memory tells me it was, but I kept getting these glimmers of memories when we'd turn down a street or drive past a familiar place.

After we got all unpacked and situated at the Airbnb Josh and I took a walk around the neighborhood as we watched the sun set.

Sites, smells and weather are such strange reminders of the past.

Day 11: Bishop's Castle - Penny Arcade

2024-07-26T14:22:00.000-04:00

After we checked out of our cabin we had two stops we wanted to take on the way back down to my Aunt and Uncle's where we would spend the night one more time.

Bishop's Castle was quite a site. An eccentric man dedicated much of his adult life building this castle by hand all by himself. I have no idea how it is able to be a public attraction where anyone can climb literally ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP! I made it to the first outer wrap-around wire walkway but I couldn't will myself to go any farther. It was terrifying! Zeke went much farther and captured some epic drone footage. Cai and Rainy made it to the top, the VERY TOP and lived to tell the story, which I am eternally grateful for. Parts of the castle were really beautiful though. A mix of medieval cathedral if you will. I do wonder what the builder's overall idea was in the making of this one-of-a-kind castle.

You can actually see Zeke in the middle of that upper bridge in this first pictures.

This is as far as I got!

There was a goat on-site that kept jumping up on picnic tables and eating people's food. It was hilarious!

After this we headed to the Penny Arcade in Manitou Springs.

Josh got some really cool pictures he shared on Instagram. I walked around in the very crowded, un-airconditioned arcade, made a note about how cool it was and swiftly made my way back out to sit on a bench and wait for the kids to have their fill of this vintage arcade. The boys really liked it!

We were pretty exhausted after the day and were once again glad to walk into my Aunt and Uncle's for some rest as we prepped for our trip home. I am SO sad I didn't get a single picture with them:(

Day 10: St. Princeton Hot Springs

2024-07-25T11:22:00.002-04:00

Our last full day at Deer Valley was spent at the Mt. Princeton Hot Springs.

I hardly took any pictures, because I was swimming and sunbathing in the pools heated by the natural hot springs from the mountain. Pretty cool. You could get passes to go down the slides. There were two of them and Jude especially had a blast going down them over and over.

We ended our day eating delicious mexican cuisine in Beuna Vista together with everybody.

And then back to the cabins to get in one more swim at the Ranch and begin getting our car ready for our trip home.

Day 9: Train Ride - St. Elmo

2024-07-25T11:20:00.000-04:00

Today's agenda started with a train ride. We drove to Leadville (I used to walk these streets as a kid) and boarded a restored train that preserved a portion of the old railroad system. Again, Zeke has some amazing footage from this trip. It was beautiful. One of the workers told stories and history the entire trip up. The trip back was for viewing pleasure only (hence the quick little nap Josh and I took before we stopped).

After the train ride we meandered downtown Leadville for a little bit before heading back to the cabin.

Some of the kids wanted to go swimming so we dropped off the swimmers at our cabin and Rainy, Josh and I headed to St. Elmo's, a ghost town, to walk around and feed the chipmunks.

Day 8: Horse Ride - Family - WWII

2024-07-25T11:19:00.001-04:00

I loved the cabin we stayed in. And the kids did too. It was literally right next to the pool where they were pretty much any other time they weren't out on our daily adventures. I promised I wouldn't post the picture I took of the boys in their workout headquarters. They seriously had the best room though. No, seriously. They got the master suite, ha! JUDE had the entire king size bed to himself while Cai and Zeke took the bunkbed in the same room. That allowed them to have their own bathroom which the rest of us sure didn't mind. They held daily workouts together with the weights we brought from home because muscles are important.

The other bathroom had the girls room on one side and me and Josh on the other. It was perfect (minus the oven that didn't work, but whatever).

I got up the next morning and did a solo hike around the property collecting wildflowers.

This was before heading out to Mt. Princeton Riding Stables for a ride through the terrain on horseback.

Shortly after we got back from riding, my Aunt and Uncle (who we stayed with in Colorado Springs) and their two kids (you'll recognize Danny from when we went through Denver) came bearing dinner and a sweet night hanging out. My cousin Becky is almost my age and Danny is almost my brother's age. We were the best of friends in the summers growing up!

We settled in after dinner for a presentation my dad has been tirelessly working on. Back when my mom was teaching fifth grade, her students would go through WWII in history. When I was a kid I remember the summer they asked my Papa to recount war stories triggered by a stack of pictures. They recorded the stories on cassette and put together in a slide show, correlating the photos on slides and the stories on casette tape to play for my mom's students. My dad recently converted it to one format (I believe that is the true technical word) into a video that we watched together. It was the first time some of the kids had ever heard their great grandpa, much less hear the war stories of him as a feisty, hilarious and not-afraid-to-get-into-trouble medic in WWII. It was really special to be able to view that altogether.