That Other Paper | Austin's ONLY Paper

Michael Bay's rejected 'Dark Knight' script

Christine Acker — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 12:43:06 -0500

photo / Yosi :) The night is darkest just before the dawn

Poor Michael Bay. The director of such blockbusters as Armageddon, Pearl Harbor, and Transformers apparently wrote a script for The Dark Knight that Warner Bros. rejected. There, there, Michael. It’s really for the best. Maybe you should stick to movies with less plot than The Dark Knight.

Read the rejected script here.

Overheard in Austin | Office Elevator

Christine Acker — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 10:03:39 -0500

Office Elevator

Well-dressed man on cell phone “That message made me so happy. It’s the best I’ve ever gotten. I’m saving it forever. Yeah, the message that they’re not coming with us on vacation.”

Video: Western Spaghetti

That Other Paper — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 15:59:07 -0500

Check out this deliciously awesome stop-motion video from director/animator PES.

via Geekologie

Zombie voters and fortune cookies

That Other Paper — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 13:31:35 -0500

The Loose Cannon Libertarian

Who are Barack Obama’s supporters?

Picture an old 1950s era black-and-white zombie movie. The undead rise from their graves, begin lurching forward, arms outstretched, eyes vacant, all murmuring eerily in unison, “Change, change, change…”

photo / roxannejomitchell “Change, change, change…”

Except Obama’s zombies don’t rise from graves. They emerge from high schools and colleges and Hollywood soundstages and media centers.

Much has been made of Obama’s appeal to American youth. His hook is emotion and vague idealism, which works well on people loaded with emotion and vague idealism but little in the way of experience and genuine knowledge. A generation that barely discerns between Bambi and actual rutting deer can’t be expected to distinguish charisma from substance.

Tonight at Cap City: Eddie Gossling w/ Jimmie Roulette

Kristin Hillery — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 09:23:11 -0500

Eddie Gossling

Comedian Eddie Gossling comes into town pretty frequently to do shows at Cap City Comedy Club. Not a surprise considering he has a good following here, typically playing to large crowds at the club and somehow getting up early enough to sit in on the morning show with Dudley and Bob on KLBJ 93.7. Though he’s a New York native, Eddie first got into stand-up comedy in San Antonio before becoming the house emcee at Cap City years ago.

Eddie is performing tonight at Cap City and will be doing shows through July 26, so check him out if you get a chance. Another local favorite, Jimmie Roulette, will be opening for him. UPDATE: Doug Mellard and 2008 Funniest Person in Austin winner Eric Krug will also be performing.

8pm (10:30pm shows on some days) | $9–$44.95 | Get tickets

Cap City Comedy Club
801 Red River St • Austin, TX

South 40 | Robots part 2

Kristin Hillery — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 09:18:47 -0500

TOP pick: July 23

That Other Paper — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 09:15:57 -0500

Wednesday | July 23

Carolyn Wonderland

KGSR Blues on the Green — Carolyn Wonderland

Every other Wednesday through August, KGSR hosts Blues on the Green, its free summer concert series. Past artists have been Los Lonely Boys, Marcia Ball, Asleep at the Wheel, and more, and playing tonight is guitar goddess Carolyn Wonderland, who has released six CDs and been featured on 20. The KGSR website says: “A bit of a renegade, she likes to incorporate elements of Blues, Country, Swing, Zydeco, Surf, Gospel, Soul, and some nights, maybe even a Cumbia into the musical mix.” Best of all, this event is free! (Remember, Zilker doesn’t let you have glass bottles or alcohol.)

7:30pm–9:30pm| FREE

Zilker Park
2100 Barton Springs Rd • Austin, TX

TOP pick: July 22

Kristin Hillery — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 15:45:45 -0500

Tuesday | July 22

Borromeo String Quartet

courtesy Boromeo String Quartet

The 2008 Austin Chamber Music Festival is happening through July 25, and tonight the festival features the famed Borromeo String Quartet. The Boston Globe says the quartet is “simply the best there is on this planet; every appearance they make is an event.” Tonight they will perform Beethoven’s “String Quartet No. 3,” Bartok’s “String Quartet No. 6,” and Schumann’s “String Quartet No. 1.” Get tickets here.

7:30pm | $29

Michael and Susan Dell Hall at the Long Center for the Performing Arts
701 W Riverside Dr • Austin, TX 78704

Overheard in Austin | Spider House

Bradley Jackson — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 12:17:02 -0500

Spider House

Woman “I have to smoke a joint when I wake up. Otherwise I have headaches.”

Her friend “Yeah, I definitely prefer drinking.”

Any and all plans of swimming at local apartment pool ruined

Kristin Hillery — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 14:51:27 -0500

Ahhh, summer. A time to “soak up the sun,” “catch some rays,” and “swim around in water.”

For residents of Las Palmas Apartments, any and all plans of swimming this summer are officially ruined because the pool is now officially haunted.

photo / GodsMoon

Residents in a Southeast Austin apartment complex discovered a man’s body floating in the apartment’s pool.

Police were called to the scene at 2409 Town Lake Circle shortly after 5pm Sunday afternoon.

Although he was found submerged in the water, police are waiting for autopsy reports to determine exactly what caused his death. However, they do not believe that this was a suspicious death.

Read the rest of the story from KVUE

Are you the Funniest Filmmaker in Austin?

Hansel McRobertsworth — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 14:01:38 -0500

You’re probably not. Sorry.

But in case you want to try for the title (and be rejected), here’s the info:

photo / Kristin Hillery Oh, hey, it’s those guys

It’s back! Austin Film Festival, Cap City Comedy Club and The Onion are proud to announce The Third Annual Funniest Filmmaker in Austin contest! Enter by August 11th, 2008 and on Monday August 18th, join host and former Funniest Person in Austin winner Matt Bearden to see who wins the contest.

Hit us with your best shot. It’s free to enter and the winner will play the Austin Film Festival this October. Not a professional? Don’t despair! Funny beats technical ability in this contest. Quick and dirty shorts are welcome!

read more

Bill and Erik | Grilled cheese robot

That Other Paper — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 09:40:08 -0500

Overheard in Austin | Rudy's

Kristin Hillery — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:44:40 -0500

Rudy’s

Woman “I just don’t understand why they’d advertise being ‘the worst bar-b-q in Texas.’ Why are people eating here?”

photo / cogdogblog

Larry Craig won't be jerked around by his gas nozzle

Hansel McRobertsworth — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:42:58 -0500

Idaho senator Larry Craig, who was busted last year for lewd conduct in a Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport restroom, really needs to be careful about what he says. Especially when he’s talking about being jerked around by your gas nozzle.

Punchline-up for tonight, July 18

Kristin Hillery — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:38:49 -0500

Punchline

Another Friday, another fabulous Punchline to look forward to. What’s that? Something about a dark night? Yes, tonight it will get dark outside, but ColdTowne Theater’s parking lot is well-lit and you will surely be able to find your way inside. No excuses, Dad!

Tonight’s Punchline will be hosted by Ramin Nazer, and here’s the line-up:

Mason Lerner
Dan French
Tully Minoski
Shane Hebert
Benjamin Johnson
Juan Salinas
Michael Stansbury
Alexy Ronaldo
Jose Fuentes
Lynette LaMonica
Carey Moore
Matt Bearden

10pm (arrive early) | $5 at the door

512-Go!» ColdTowne Theater | map
4803 Airport Blvd (same building as I Luv Video) • 524-2807

South 40 | Trainwreck

Kristin Hillery — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 15:23:57 -0500

The Happiest Hours: Gingerman

Kristin Hillery — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:31:17 -0500

Gingerman

Beer flows from over 80 taps covering the entire wall behind the long bar; it’s hard to find a better selection. They have darts and pool, and all the furniture is comfortable, arranged into conversation snugs throughout the bar. If you’re with a large group it might be difficult to find a place to sit all together. Your best bet would likely be in the spacious beer garden out back, but even then, it’s iffy.

Sunday: Happy hour prices for all service industry workers. Monday: Logo pint nights featuring a different beer each Monday. Buy the beer and keep the glass. Tuesday: All Texas beers are $3 after 5pm. Thursday: All pints are $3 from 6pm–6:30pm.

Gingerman
304 W 4th Street • 473-8801

Masters of the unintended

That Other Paper — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 15:57:53 -0500

The Loose Cannon Libertarian

Libertarians continually point out that the one thing mainstream politicians everywhere never seem to learn, no matter how many do-overs they get, is this: All actions have consequences; ill-conceived actions have unintended consequences.

This is because the politician’s response to every issue is the same: Governmental coercion solves all problems.

It’s a knee-jerk formula for jerks: See problem A, pass law B, get result C. Problem solved.

Penciltucky: Part 10

Pat Volz — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 09:49:21 -0500

An open letter to the jerks who vandalized my apartment complex

Christine Acker — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 17:08:36 -0500

Open Letters

photo / Lord Jim

Dear drunk assholes with the maturity of a 12-year-old:

Thank you so much for vandalizing the clubhouse and pool area of my apartment complex. I’m surprised you didn’t die when you pulled the lights out of the swimming pool. Didn’t you pay attention in sixth grade science? Electricity plus water equal electrocution. Oh, it was also great of you to drag that parking space bumper out of its spot and put it in the middle of the parking lot around the corner where no one turning the corner could see it. You’re lucky management found and moved it before someone ruined their car and sued your sorry little asses. And dumping garbage all over the clubhouse — genius! I can’t believe you came up with that yourselves. Your little prank did $2,000 worth of damage and resulted in no one being able to use the clubhouse, pool, or exercise room after office hours. So thanks! I hope you had a good time on your drunken spree, because you ruined the apartment amenities for the rest of us.

Poll: What's your favorite foot?

Todd Ross Nienkerk — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 16:19:40 -0500

Important Daily Poll

photo / A.A.

What’s your favorite foot?

Scenes from a 'ghetto mall'

Todd Ross Nienkerk — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 15:50:50 -0500

Girl on Top

If anyone in the whole world is pumped about appealing to a large audience — literally and figuratively — it is Marianne. Proudly advertising clothing in sizes that range from 4 to 24, Marianne boasts a boxy logo and wares that make the flimsy trendoid squares of fabric at Forever 21 look like delicately sewn couture. Indeed, Marianne is precisely the type of store that should flourish in what is commonly known as a “ghetto mall,” where cost is considered over quality; where glitter and elastic are deeply valued commodities. Austin’s Highland Mall is happy to have her.

And yet, Marianne is closing soon. Her big, yellow banners say so. She has gone the way of Ann Taylor. And Jessica McCormick. They’re quietly slipping out of Highland Mall like sorority girls at a dive bar. Through the cracks of its occasionally duct-taped brown tile floor, a powerful strain of retail Ebola seeps through. And judging by the slogging, swaying gait of the stroller-pushing patrons, the virus may be going cross-species. Witness the slow crumbling of yet another one of America’s altars to consumerism. O Gods of shopping, what sacrifice might we make to save it?

photo / 33mhz Poop-streaked sign outside of Austin’s Highland Mall

Summer fun: Hamilton Pool

Kristin Hillery — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 13:20:17 -0500

photo / Glamour Schatz Hamilton Pool

Ohmygod. There’s a 50-foot waterfall here. And that’s just one of many reasons why Hamilton Pool is worth the 30-minute drive (and the subsequent quarter-mile walk from the parking lot — bring decent shoes). This superlative swimming hole is gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, and the opposite of an eyesore.

9am to 6pm daily, weather permitting (call 512-264-2740 to see if they’re open)

No admittance after 5:30pm

Day permit: $8 (per vehicle)
Pedestrian/bicyclist: $3

Activities:

swimming (when allowed)
picnicking
hiking
nature study
guided tours
pretend you’re in the movie Teeth

Hamilton Pool
24300 Hamilton Pool Rd bull; Austin, TX 73301

Buck up, ladies: Oklahoma City on the verge of jacking the 'Outlaws'

Chris Trew — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 08:47:30 -0500

photo / Bethany L King Come on, ladies. We’re heading to Oklahoma City to crack some heads.

The NBA’s Supersonics are heading out of Seattle and into Oklahoma City (boooo). Since the team owners are sweet enough guys to leave the name “Supersonics” behind, Oklahoma City gets to have a naming contest for their team (yay!). The four finalists were recently revealed by ESPN and they are (drum roll, please): Barons, Thunder, Thunderbirds, and Outlaws.

Austin, I know, I thought the same exact thing. We’re the Outlaws. Sure, there are two Giants (San Francisco and New York), two Kings (Los Angeles and Sacramento), two Panthers (Carolina and Florida), as well as two Rangers (Texas and New York). But of those teams, only the Kings are anywhere near each other on a map (384 miles between LA and Sacramento) and we’re not going to count them because they’re in the same state. That officially makes the Outlaws the worst possible choice for Oklahoma City, as a mere 388 miles separate OKC and ATX.

Are you ready for the mind games to get even deeper? Hold on to something squishy with one hand and keep scrolling down with the other.

Overheard in Austin | Luby's

Christine Acker — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 17:05:45 -0500

Luby’s

Girl on cell phone “I always think it’s a good idea to date two guys at once with the same name so there are no possible accidents in bed.”

South 40 | Lazy eye

That Other Paper — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 17:00:28 -0500

Is the Obama 'New Yorker' cover tasteless?

Hansel McRobertsworth — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 14:07:46 -0500

The New Yorker’s latest cover, illustrated by The Politics of Fear artist Barry Blitt, has everyone pretty much flipping out today. Many, including both the Obama and McCain camps, say that the cover is just plain offensive and tasteless, but the New Yorker says it just “satirizes the use of scare tactics and misinformation in the presidential election to derail Barack Obama’s campaign.”

July 21, 2008, issue of the New Yorker

What do you think?

TOP picks: July 14 - 20

That Other Paper — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 11:03:17 -0500

Monday | July 14

Karaoke Underground

You won’t find your typical karaoke hits at The Parish tonight — LCD Soundsystem, Belle and Sebastian, and Joan Jett are more the style at Karaoke Underground. You can see their songlist here.

8pm | FREE

The Parish
214 E 6th St bull; Austin, TX

Tuesday | July 15

Psycho Beach Party

courtesy Alamo Drafthouse

This is the second Hey Homo! event the Drafthouse has done, and this time the movie is Psycho Beach Party, starring Six Feet Under’s Lauren Ambrose. From the Drafthouse:

This film is a perfect mix of 1960s surfer movies and 1980s slasher flicks, so dress accordingly or be called out by MC Rebecca Havemeyer! Now we can’t bring you a beach, but expect an Air Surfing Competition, Hawaiian Leis, special drinks, performances and a zillion awesome queer folk!

10pm | $10 | Get tickets

Alamo Drafthouse at the Ritz
320 E 6th St • Austin, TX

What you probably don't know about your credit card

Todd Ross Nienkerk — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 10:18:55 -0500

photo / Brett L. Painted credit card mural in San Francisco

Last week, the Consumerist published an excellent list of ten things you might not know about your credit card — a veritable Bill of Rights for those who pack plastic. Excerpted below are four of the most important points addressed in their piece, plus some clarification and discussion from yours truly. (Bolded text is quoted from the Consumerist.)

Unsigned cards are not valid, and merchants can and will refuse them.

Think you’re protecting yourself by writing “Check ID” in the signature space on the back of the card? You’re clever, but you’re wrong: Credit cards must be signed.

Bill and Erik | Yep, Abraham Lincoln

That Other Paper — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 10:04:14 -0500

A pretty tough interview with Master Pancake Theater

Michael Williams — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 11:15:05 -0500

Related links
Master Pancake on MySpace Master Pancake’s schedule at the Drafthouse

Bonnie and Clyde, Romeo and Juliet, Mork and Mindy, Ren and Stimpy — history has given us a fair share of powerful duos over the past few years. Some of them make us want to sing. Think Salt-n-Pepa. Some of them make us want to fight crime. Think Batman and Robin. Others make us want to eat. Again, think Salt-n-Pepa. What I’m getting at is that unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past eight years, or unless you just moved here from California, you have seen a Master Pancake Theater show at the Alamo Drafthouse. This also means that you have been exposed to a certain duo that masters the art of poking fun of cheesy movies. That Other Paper’s Michael Williams sat down with Master Pancake Theater’s John Erler and Joe Parsons to talk about many funny things, some of which will not be reproduced. Sorry.

courtesy Master Pancake The cast of Master Pancake’s Independence Day show: David Jara, Joe Parsons, John Erler, and Mac Blake

That Other Paper Master Pancake Theater. How did you come up with that name?

John Erler Oh man, that’s a tough one.

Joe Parsons Yeah, maybe we should come back to that.

TOP Okay, moving on. I polled some of our readers and asked them what questions they would like me to ask you. Here we go. What is your favorite color?

JP How old is this reader?

Andrew Gurland: comedy, realism, and moral ambiguity

Todd Ross Nienkerk — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 14:31:21 -0500

Related links
Video: Mail Order Wife trailer Video: Black People Hate Me and They Hate My Glasses Are those two fools back at it again? An article about the controversy surrounding Gurland and Todd Phillip’s film Frat House Andrew Gurland on IMDB.com

Andrew Gurland blends comedy, realism, and moral ambiguity reminiscent of film noir to create films that are funny, memorable, uncomfortable, and surprising. For Gurland, his films aren’t a direct expression of how he views people and their actions, but are often a fantasy that allow him to vicariously explore what he doesn’t have the opportunity to do in reality, such as commit acts of revenge and hang around pretty girls. In this Q-and-A, Gurland reveals some of his influences, what he strives for in his films, and hints at what’s to come.

That Other Paper In Fuck Gramaglia Up, the character you portray says, “I enjoy the human experience and seeing how people react in certain situations.” How does this quote relate to your own motivations for making films?

Andrew Gurland Well, I mean most of the film, performance-wise, is all improvised, so it’s not like I spent a great deal of time on that line. Even though I usually work with a script, I like to keep it pretty loose.

TOP What is your motivation for making films?

AG Well, it’s my job, firstly, and I guess I love the movies. I love all kinds of different movies, and I love being surprised. So, as a result, I’m always trying to surprise people.

Backspin: It's what DJs do

Michael Williams — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 12:44:21 -0500

Related links
Backspin Records on MySpace

It’s Saturday night and you’re going to unwind by going to your favorite club. Oh joy! Eventually you’re at that club. Hurray you! But then you hear “You’re not on the list.” Oops! You’ve been caught in a lie. Plus, those words can really hurt your self-esteem when you’re trying to get into a show for free. So you say, “I’m with the DJ.” Good move! Those words will surely allow you to move past that mean bouncer who’s trying to take your money and prevent your free entrance into Dance City. But then you hear “I don’t care.” Oh no! Some more words that can super-duper hurt your already fragile self-esteem. This is no good. Fortunately for you That Other Paper’s Michael Williams got access and was able to sit down with DJ and Backspin Records co-owner Eric Wallenstein (aka DJ Mijora y Minora). Hopefully you won’t break a sweat when reading this one.

courtesy Backspin’s MySpace page Backspin’s old location on Burnet Rd

That Other Paper You have a pretty massive collection of records. Do you remember your first record?

Eric Wallenstein My first record was by the Rock-afire Explosion Band, that animal band that played at Showbiz Pizza. I didn’t even have a record player at the time, but that was my first record. I got more involved with collecting records once I got to high school and started listening to punk and going to more shows.

Overheard in Austin | HEB Far West

Christine Acker — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 10:35:12 -0500

HEB Far West

Girl to her friend “At least I’m still attracted to him after seeing him in Spandex.”

Penciltucky: Part 9

Pat Volz — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 09:27:34 -0500

Not your mother's Austin poll

Christine Acker — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:50:44 -0500

photo / Christopher Althouse Cohen This statue at Spiderhouse is a douchebag

Over at the Austin LiveJournal community, user stupidis, a new Austinite, has posted a question that might tell us more about the landscape of our beloved city than any poll has before or ever will again. stupidis writes:

Dear austincommunity,

I’m new to this wonderful city and I’m really enjoying discovering the new sights, sounds and destinations offered therein. I was in an area to remain unnamed earlier this evening swarming with douchebaggery and it occurred to me: I really like most of the people here, dozens of warm, friendly, generous folks have made my transition great. But, well, there seem to be a lot of douchebags in certain areas.

So, I thought this might be a good conversation to have in the community. In your own opinion (and that’s why I’m being vague, because I think everyone’s definition of douchebag is different. Mine is obnoxious college kids playing pool volleyball and throwing half full beer cans): WHAT’S THE DOUCHIEST PLACE IN AUSTIN?

Bonus points if you, like me, are in fact a douchebag (yes, I know about my user icon) and can claim your own favorite hangout.

Regards,
stupidis

Ballpointing the pointy-headed head cases

Kristin Hillery — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 09:23:06 -0500

The Loose Cannon Libertarian

Admit it. You know you’ve done it. You’re loafing in your Laz-Z-Butt lounger in your living room, or compressed between passengers in the middle seat on the Crack O’ Dawn flight to East Piddlyborough, or sneaking an on-the-job mini-vacation in the stinky-stall of your workplace pottyroom, when your eyes land on a line of type in the local Balderdash Bulletin you’ve been drowsily browsing through.

Some subnormal moron did something stunningly stupid today, or said something incredibly enlightened, or offered an ignorant opinion and it was all prominently preserved in newsprint.

TOP picks: July 7-13

Christine Acker — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 09:12:26 -0500

Wednesday | July 9

Austin Farmer’s Market

If you party too hard on Friday nights to make Saturday’s 9am–1pm Farmer’s Market, don’t worry — it happens on Wednesdays, too. Support local (within 150 miles) farmers, ranchers, dairies, and nurseries while getting fresh food and listening to live music. The market is part of the Sustainable Food Center, and they certify that sellers grow 100% of what they sell. Check out the Austin Farmer’s Market website for more information.

4pm–8pm | FREE

Triangle Park
46th and Guadalupe • Austin, TX 78751

Bill and Erik | Aliens part 5

That Other Paper — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 08:39:29 -0500

Nine years of everything

Annalee Newitz — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 08:35:26 -0500

I’ve been writing this column for nine years. I was here with you through the dot-com boom and the crash. I made fun of the rise of Web 2.0 when that was called for, and screamed about digital surveillance under the USA-PATRIOT Act when that was required (actually, that’s still required). I’ve ranted about everything from obscenity law to genetic engineering, and I’ve managed to stretch this column’s techie mandate to include meditations on electronic music and sexology. Every week I gave you my latest brain dump, even when I was visiting family in Saskatchewan or taking a year off from regular journalism work to study at MIT.

Overheard in Austin | Genuine Joe

Christine Acker — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 21:15:35 -0500

Genuine Joe

Guy “Willie Nelson and Johnny Cash? That doesn’t make any sense!”

Andrew W.K.: Appreciating lipstick

Bradley Jackson — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0500

photo / fredcamino Andrew W.K. performing at the Knitting Factory in Hollywood

Related links
Andrew W.K.’s website Andrew W.K.’s MySpace

Before speaking with Andrew W.K. I knew one definitive fact about him: The guy likes to party. With such songs as “Party Hard,” “Party ‘Til You Puke,” and “We Want Fun,” Andrew has established himself as a unique voice in rock ’n’ roll. But in the past few years he’s extended what it means to be Andrew W.K. by going on tours and speaking on the beauty of partying and pure love. Most interviews only last 20 to 30 minutes, but Andrew talked with me for an hour and a half about everything from the meaning of life to the joys of wearing lipstick. He even gave me my very own personalized motivational speech. Don’t miss his show at Emo’s on July 4, and check out his production skills on Reggae legend Lee Scratch Perry’s new album, which hits stores August 19.

That Other Paper What is the worst question you’ve ever been asked in an interview?

Andrew W.K. I don’t know — I’ve probably blocked it out. Actually, the questions over the last couple of years have just been getting better and better. I always thought that interview questions were good no matter what the question was, and that it was really up to the interviewee to come up with novel answers. I always understood the idea of people getting a little angry at interview questions, but I thought it was a little perverse, because why would they be doing the interview then? And this whole idea that it’s all up to the interviewer to make a good interview didn’t gel with my vibe. So I really get into doing interviews and have grown to love it very, very much.

Theft and independence

Rachel Starnes — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:04:23 -0500

photo / danesparza

I’m trying to imagine the look on the face of whoever stole my credit card number as they roll up to the Selma, California, Wienerschnitzel this morning for what has become an almost daily pilgrimage. Their likely agenda, based on my husband Ross’s and my recent profanity-laced examination of the last three weeks of our online credit card statement:

11:30am: Roll out of bed and throw on some flip-flops for a hearty drive-through breakfast at Wienerschnitzel.

Noon: Hit up Wal-Mart for the day’s first $400 shopping spree. [Suspected purchases: stacks of bad top-40 CDs, XL yellow tube top, power tools, crate of Huggies for miscellaneous spawn, Natural Lite beer].

2:00pm: Stop by Valero to gas up the monster truck and buy cigs and Slim Jims.

Craigslist: Your Bigfoot sighting could be your ticket to Blogspot fame

Christine Acker — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 12:48:24 -0500

photo / CommandZed Nice rack

Have you seen Bigfoot around lately? If you have, Archer Cannon from Liberty Hill, Texas wants you to let him know. He’s starting a blog on the subject and wants to talk about your experiences with you.

From his Craigslist post:

Bigfoot in Texas?? (Liberty Hill Area)

Hello. I am a native Austinite and my family has been in Texas for years. I have seen a bigfoot, I have heard it screams, and so has my sister, my son, and my brother.. These were all seen at different times; however almost all on the same piece of heavily wooded land in Liberty Hill, Texas. I sent my stories to BFRO, and never heard from them. They do have one story that speaks of a Bigfoot encounter near Lake Travis sometime ago and that is it.
read more

Penciltucky: Part 8

Pat Volz — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 12:00:05 -0500

The Happiest Hours: The Jackalope

Kristin Hillery — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 11:57:23 -0500

The Jackalope

A kind of oasis on 6th Street, the Jackalope has a decadent lounge feel — dimly lit booths and velvet paintings line the walls around the padded horseshoe-shaped bar. Horror movies play on the various televisions. Out back there’s an outdoor bar, La Cucaracha, where you can smoke cigarettes and nod your head to the loud music or just gaze at the fire sculpture. The staff is hip, the clientele diverse, and you can always drink for cheap.

Tuesday is half-priced chicken wings, Wednesday is 2-for-1 burger night, and on Thursday all pints are $2 (amazing deal).

Warning: NSFW

512-Go!» The Jackalope
404 E 6th St • 469-5801

Texas A&M: Watermelons give you boners

Hansel McRobertsworth — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 17:26:01 -0500

photo / Krissi AKA Kiki HURRY

Scientists at Texas A&M have found that citrulline, an ingredient in watermelon, can trigger production of a compound that helps relax blood vessels in the body — which is effectively what Viagra does.

Found in the flesh and rind of watermelons, citrulline reacts with the body’s enzymes when consumed and is changed into arginine, an amino acid that benefits the heart, and the circulatory and immune systems.

“Arginine boosts nitric oxide, which relaxes blood vessels, the same basic effect that Viagra has, to treat erectile dysfunction and maybe even prevent it,” said Bhimu Patil, a researcher and director of Texas A&M’s Fruit and Vegetable Improvement Center. “Watermelon may not be as organ specific as Viagra, but it’s a great way to relax blood vessels without any drug side-effects.”

Too good to be true? Kinda. To boost the body’s arginine level, you’d have to eat about six cups of watermelon. And then you’d be on your way to Pee City (two exits past Urine Town). Plus, consuming all that sugar could cause cramping.

Of course, men have known for centuries that tasty melons give you boners.

Read the full story at the Houston Chronicle.

Inspiration: San Francisco's Victory Garden

Kristin Hillery — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 15:22:02 -0500

Slow Food Nation Victory Garden rendering

Urban gardens are sprouting up (zing!) in many cities all over the world, since food prices are on the rise, and, well, it’s just a damn good idea.

Yesterday in San Francisco, Slow Food Nation began working on a large victory garden in front of City Hall. This garden is being planted on the same site as the post-World War II gardens 60 years ago, when the nation’s food supplies were low and the economy was in rough shape. At the time, victory gardens across the country — planted on both public and private land — supplied 40 percent of the food surplus. Food grown in the Slow Food Nation Victory Garden in San Francisco will be donated to food banks and people in need.

Featuring a wide variety of heritage organic vegetables suited to the Bay Area microclimate, the garden displays the diversity of urban food production practices. It is a garden of communities: all food grown in the garden will be harvested and donated to those with limited access to healthy organic produce through our partnership with local food banks and meals programs.

Urban gardening is a great idea — and a nice way to get people involved in doing something for their community. You can get involved in Slow Food Nation right here in Austin: Visit SlowFoodAustin.org. No word yet on whether they’re planning to dig up the Capitol grounds to plant a Victory Garden, but that would be sweet.

Overheard in Austin | Congress and 7th

Christine Acker — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 14:28:55 -0500

Two girls in crosswalk

Girl #1 “You have really nice boobs.”

Girl #2 “Thanks! I think you have really nice boobs, too.”

Girl #1 “This would be a weird conversation for someone to overhear.”

Preemptive crime fighting

That Other Paper — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 10:16:55 -0500

The Loose Cannon Libertarian

Libertarians have long warned that interventionism in foreign affairs inexorably leads to interventionism in domestic policy.

photo / +lyn

The hallmark of worldwide liberal-blessed Neocon-beloved empire building is the quaint little idea of preemptive war. The mentality works like this:

“That nasty little backwater sandbox of Upyerwazooistan, whose military can’t fight its way out of a moldy goatskin, might have a weapon of mass destruction which they might give to a terrorist which they might smuggle across our dangerously wide-open southern border in a donkey cart which might be used to blow up the President’s vacation home so we have to bomb third-world peasants and kill off thousands of American soldiers in the process of imposing the ideal of corrupt American-style ‘democracy’ on everyone.”