::The Dim MoonLight::

I'm Not Like Other Girls.

2012-12-26T21:48:00.001+08:00

When people sees me, I'm just a plain girl. I'm not like the other girls.

I don't wear make ups.

I don't wear high heels.

I am not fashionable.

I am not gentle.

I am not graceful.

I am not afraid of frogs or snakes.

I don't act cute in front of guys.

But that doesn't mean I don't act like a girl. It just, I feel more comfortable being myself rather than deceive myself.

I'm normal and plain. But at the same time full of charm only people who'll understand me knows that. :)

It's Not Hard, But. . .

2012-12-14T19:48:00.000+08:00

What are the things in the world that you find hard? For me, it's like trying to lift the world. Seems hard right? But with correct mentality. I can lift the world. So do you. How? Here's the trick; try doing a handstand then ask a friend to take a picture. If you rotate the picture 180 degree, you'll see that you are in fact lifting the world. :)

What I'm trying to say is, we can do anything we want. We can be anything we want. With the mentality like that, we are unstoppable. So start thinking outside the box. We can make a different. We can change the world towards the better future.

Think different. Be different. Because our differences makes the world go round.

#Unintended To Happen

2012-12-12T15:44:00.002+08:00

I woke up, but it's three in the morning. Can't sleep, my heart beat is racing.

I started to call you. But you didn't answer the first call, then I'd redial it. You've picked it up, but your voice is slurred.

I told you a bad dream I had about you. About us.

I want to cry, but I don't want you to worry about me. Then I send you back to sleep with a lullaby.

It's nine in the morning. I went to see you.

Thank God.

We went to the cake shop you always loved. We went to a cinema to watch a love movie. We went shopping unnecessarily things. We spend time under the trees chatting unimportant stuff. But still I love it.

As the time pass, it's time to send you back home.

When we arrive at the front of your house, my heart just sank.

I don't want to be apart from you.

After you say "Goodbye, see you again!" with a smile and when in, I just stood there.

My feet won't move. I kept waiting for you to come out again.

Suddenly it started to rain. A couple minutes later, you came out to tell me to go home.

I did as you wish, I just wanted to see your face for a little longer.

After taking shower and changing clothes, I went to bed.

My eyes getting heavier . . .

*My phone rang*

"Hello. . ."

"Ery! Liya is gone! She just passed away! Ery? Can you hear me? Ery! . . ."

There was nothing left to say. This is what happened in my dream yesterday.

As I've feared. My dream come true. Why . . . :(

Socially Awkward

2012-11-27T00:21:00.000+08:00

::One day in UiTM ( a university I'm currently studying at)::

Person : Hi! May I seat next to you?
Me : Sure.
Person : What's your name? :)
Me : Nana.
Person : Okay then.
...Awkward Silent...

2nd Attempt (by the same person)
Person : So, what course are you in?
Me : Computer Science.
...Another Awkward Silent...

3rd Attempt
Person : Wow! Being in BPC (first aid program) really hard right? :D
Me : Yeah.
...End Of Conversation...

Did you see how'd it go? I'm not being arrogant or hypocrite. I'm just not good in socializing. I don't know how to be more responsive or start a new conversation. If you ever want to talk to me, please go easy with me. I'm not used to talk to somebody randomly. But my friend said if that ever happens again, I should just smiled! But (I hate to break this to you), I have the weirdest smile ever!!! Now, I'm still in training to be less awkward by talking to myself.

The Next Week
That person never sit beside me ever again and the new person are experiencing the same treatment. Sorry.

I AM AWKWARD!

Sometimes, I...

2012-11-23T23:38:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, I can be such an airhead.

Sometimes, I can be dense.

Sometimes, I can be clumsy.
Sometimes, I can be dorky.
Sometimes, I can be adorable.
Sometimes, I can be grumpy.
Sometimes, I can be cheerful.

Sometimes, I am forgetful.
Sometimes, I am quiet.
Sometimes, I am loud.

Sometimes, I am a crybaby.

Sometimes, I am whiny.

Sometimes, I am brave.

Sometimes, I am scared.
Sometimes, I am stubborn.
Sometimes, I am obedient.
Sometimes, I tell lies.
Sometimes, I don't.

Sometimes, I love you.

Sometimes, I hate you.

But, the most important thing is that you still want to be by my side even though I am like this.

My Boyfriend's Logic

2012-11-23T00:03:00.001+08:00

This just happen recently.

Him : "You're short, chubby, crybaby, grumpy, whiny. . . blah, blah, blah. . . "

Me : "Hump! Than why are you still with me!"
Him : "Because. . . I love you."

Me : "I really don't get you."

Him : "I love you because you're like a chicken! A chubby chicken! An angry chicken!"

The thing is, he never praised me like "you're cute, kind. . . " or something like this. He always resembles me to a chicken. A freaking chubby chicken! Why can't you be normal like just others?

Your Smile!

2012-11-22T22:55:00.000+08:00

I love that warm smile you've given to me.

The smile that comforts me.

I don't need lovely word from you.

Just smile for me, and I'll feel better.

I'm blind by your smile.

Your smile never seem to fade away in my mind.

It's like it has been nailed to my heart.

Even my head is little dizzy writing this,

I'm still longing to see your smile.

I miss your smile so much.

I wish I can see it everyday.

The smile that gives me strength.

The smile that never fades away.

To others, your smile is plain.

To others, it might not mean anything.

But to me, your smile is the most precious thing.

I want to protect your smile.

So you can smile like that always.

I'm sorry I can't smile as beautiful as yours.
But, my smile is honest.
Please believe me.

When can I see your smile again?

I feel like running~

The Sad Result...

2012-11-09T14:38:00.000+08:00

I wouldn't say it was bad, rather disappointing I guess. My result just came in, and the pointer was great! Seeing all the A's line down (except for java of course, C+ and totally worth it)! But, nothing is perfect, I got D+ in my calculus. The one subject I fear most. I guess my fear caught up to me. I'm frustrated because all the other subject I aced it! Why does it have to slack a bit? :( If it weren't for calculus, I think I might have dean award in my grasp. I guess that's just a dream I'll never get hold on. Ahh, stupid dream.

Now, since I've failed in calculus, I have to repeat it again. Yup! ME! I'M GONNA FREAKING REPEAT A FUUUUU PAPER!!! ARGHHHHH!!!! /floor

Ugh, I'm okay. Seriously. Nothing beats than crying in my mother's arm for comfort. I've just cry for freaking 3 hours non-stop because of this and my eye started to swell up now. :P It hurts so damn much. /sweat

Again with the repeating stuff, I don't know if there someone else gonna repeat with me, I guess I have to start taking care of myself and don't rely on other people so much. :D

I'm disappointed because all my effort didn't show a good result. It's like I didn't study at all. My mom said "It's ok, you can do it better next sem.". I know mom, it just that . . . a bit upsetting because, I know I'm stupid in numbers, but I've tried and yet I still failed. I don't know what went wrong, a lack of effort? Not enough stressing moment? But my mom taught me just let it go and do your best. Maybe God is testing me, I dunno. But one thing I know, I'm so getting my revenge on calculus. /wahaha

Congrats to all of you who have ace it and have a good result. As for me, I'm gonna work as twice as much and redeem myself. THIS IS TOTALLY GONNA HAUNT ME EVERY NIGHT!!! But I'm still grateful despite I have one fail, I still have an awesome pointer. /XD

I'm okay now (for whoever cared about me). See you again Mr. Calculus II~ /bye

Mental Game - Pet's Name

2012-10-31T12:49:00.001+08:00

Let's play simple Mental Game!

Okay, if you have a pet; cat, dog, sugar-glider, etc. What would you name it???

For example = Candy

-Subconsciously, you want people to call you that name.

So, what's your pet name? :)

************************************************************************

Haha, I named my cat, Poyo (uncool). So, that must meant that I want people to call me Uncool! /XD

And my brother call his cat, Chitang (black). Well, that suit him because his skin is darker than mine! :))

Then my dad call his cat Uwak (the sound our cat made). Well, no comment on that. :P

PyskoPaint!

2012-10-30T21:01:00.000+08:00

A few hours back I suddenly getting itches to draw again. Since I don't have a canvas, nor a paint, so I decided to draw in PsykoPaint. It's a online site where you can paint anything psychotically. Then you can put your painting in a gallery or save and share in social sites.

this is the painting I had draw

and this is the real painting that I've copied but failed. LOL

so, this is the site; the gallery where people post their painting all over the world

I know, I know. My painting is ugly, but I've tried my best. I didn't say I'm an expert right? /XD

I named the drawing 'The View I Wish For'. If you ever been to the site, please give my painting some love and rate and comment~ :D I'd really appreciated if you do it. /bye

Learning To Make GIF Image!

2012-10-28T17:59:00.002+08:00

Yayyy! My first ever GIF image! Sorry to Ara for making your video as my experiment! Very sorry! /XD

This wasn't completely a failure right? Even though the GIF is not smooth enough. Well, I'm satisfied with it and gonna try to make more! /wahaha

This is when our Family Day (a sport day where all the students of Computer Science Faculty gather and bonding). And Ara is singing and making joke there. :)

An Overly-Protective Boyfriend!

2012-10-27T01:13:00.000+08:00

I don't know if other couple experience this but I do; an over-protective boyfriend. I'm not saying he's too attach or anything, it just that he wouldn't let me do things I like. For example, I have a habit chewing on ice. I know it's not good for your health but, think of it as my teeth are hungry for crunchy thingy (???).

He found this habit when we went lunch together and suddenly he's swatting my hand as I was chewing the ice.

"Ouch! What's that for?!"

"Stop eating the ice!"

"Why! *picking up another ice*"

"Haish, *tap!* no!"

"Arghh! My ice!"

"Stop it or we'll break up!"

Yeah, I know he's not gonna do it but I stop eating ice now simply because I love him~ (seriously, I'm not scared of him. /no ).

Well, that's not the only thing he did. He knew I hate drinking plain water, so my body always dehydrated and feels hot. So whenever I eat ice-cream or simply drink cold water, I easily catch flu, and definitely he didn't like that. So, guess what, now he's forcing me to drink plain water often. I do drink it (some of the times). But nowadays I drink it with no forced-feeling (because my mum told me too, not because I'm afraid of him or anything /sweat ).

Another thing he doesn't like me doing is going out late night, whether going alone or with friends. He really hated it. I don't know why, whenever I said I'm going out at night, he'll become grumpy and moody and becoming like an old grandma nagging at me; questioning me why do I have to go at night. For example, this one night, me and my friend was kinda broke (seriously we had no money. I thought we couldn't survive tomorrow), decided to go to the ATM machine to draw out some money. At that time, I told him a bit late (we were already outside the girl's dormitory at 10 p.m).

"What the hell were you thinking going out so late?!"

"What? I'm going to the ATM machine!"

"Why couldn't you go there in the morning?!"

"I had a packed schedule today, this was the only time I had. Beside, I'm going with a friend."

"Don't you know it's dangerous for girls to be outside at this time?!"

To sum up, he was really mad at me. /sweat But! The next morning I don't know what had gotten to him, he was acting so, so normal, like nothing happened. So I decided not to bring that up. Now, I'm just too lazy to go out at night (still not afraid of him~ /wahaha )

OK, getting to the point! So, one day, I did something really stupid; I provoke all the thing he dislike; all in one day (amazing right? /XD ). He was really pissed! And we got into really huge fight! We were yelling at the top of our lung! (well, most of the time I'm the one who's yelling)

"I hate you! You always treat me like some nine year-old kid!"

". . ."

"You would think I'd do that intentionally to hurt you?! Do you think I'm stupid not knowing how to take care of myself?! I know you're trying to protect me for the better, I know okay! But his is ridiculous! This is so suffocating!!!"

"You know? What do you know? If you really know it, you wouldn't do it. I did all that because I love you, that simple. I have no other intention. If I didn't force you to do it, would you do it? Look at the result, you're not falling sick anymore, you're not injured anymore. What do you really know anyway. If you think me forcing you to do all that is suffocating you, then forget all about it. I don't wanna care anymore."

Waaaa~ /no I know I'm wrong. Forgive me. I have reflected! Finally, just like before, the next day he was acting like nothing happened. And soon started to nag me about my habits. /sweat But it was fine though, I'm glad he didn't hate me and leave me. I admire his patient and tolerance with me. No other guy can stand with my annoying attitude like he does. And I'm so grateful to that despite all the thing I did to him. :)

ok, this is my knight-in-shining-armor, his horse is behind him. LOL~

Sometime I feel, he's too good for me. :(

Kepada OrangeMoonBoy, Sila Baca!!!

2012-10-24T17:36:00.000+08:00

Saya tak tahu la whether awak akan stalk blog saya and jumpa kejadah ni atau tak.

But, if you do, please take few note. Saya tak sangka gila awak akan komen macam tu. Shocking, really. /shock

Listen, saya bukan nak drag benda ni jadi masalah besar. Saya betul-betul tak nak gaduh dengan awak dah.

Sebenarnyakan, you don't have to do that, I was ready to accept to forgive myself for the wrong thing I did to you. I was going to let it slide, I thought when we see each other again we can be friends again (or at least in the condition I'm not mad at you when I see you). Tapi perlu ke awak komen macam tu dekat blog saya! Now I have to be mean to you.

And ada masa-masa tertentu saya rasa macam nak pukul je awak!!! Seriously! Kenapa sekarang nak cakap macam tu bagai! /omg

Ughh. . . I hate myself to say that to you. Bencinye!!! Tak boleh ke awak duduk diam je selama ni? Marah saya pada awak da makin berkurang sepanjang awak tak ada. Tapi hari ni saya betul-betul sakit hati dengan awak! Saya sedih sangat tak dapat cakap perkara sebenar pada awak. I'm sorry for being mean to you. I really didn't mean it. It's just a way to defend myself. /omg

Oh ye, since awak cakap awak takkan ganggu saya, I really hope you change your mind. Memang betul saya pernah cakap tak nak kawan dengan awak da. Tapi. . . tah la. Since I have to face you one day, then why not berdamai je terus. Haaaaaaaaaaaaa. . . but, ikut awak la. Nak paksa pun tak boleh kan. /sweat

One day, saya berharap sangat kita berdamai, setelkan masalah ni. Saya malas gila nak benci awak da, tak berkat hidup saya tahu tak!

HOPEFULLY YOU READ THIS!!! So, mohon terasa sangat-sangat la ye! /bye

Tupperware - II

2012-10-23T23:39:00.000+08:00

Agagagaga. . . Today's sale didn't quite reach the expectation. Nobody has the time to stop by and listen me explain stuff. Huwaaaa. . . /floor

Since nobody was coming, I had too much time of my own; daydreaming, self-realization, planning and stuff. /hmm

Beside the boring day, I got to spend a little time; exactly about 20 minutes with him! I've asked him to accompanied me to go to the KFC at night. I didn't mind going alone, but he insisted to tag along, so I have no choice but to let him. Even though the time was short, I still have the greatest moment with him. /blush

me before going to work!

Tupperware!!

2012-10-23T11:16:00.000+08:00

Warghhh. . .! I'm working hard this semester break with Tupperware business! If I can earn enough money and new members to join this business, I'll get to go to Sydney next year! Yipeee! But it's not guaranteed yet whether I'll be going or not because the trip happens when I'm back to study. So no high hopes, just keeping it in my mind~ hehe. . .

self-drawing...ugly me~

When I'm bored at work, this is what I'd do. . .

more ugly drawing of me~

our Tupperware brand

This is our little stall. Actually there were many Tupperware we put on display, but some of it had been sold. *At first it was just for display, but since some of the customer really want it, we had to give it.*

"Stop asking me how much the ice-cream cost!"

Some people mistake me for Tunas Manja's employee. About four time the customer ask me how much the vanilla ice-cream is. . . *since our stall is close to the ice-cream place*

I'm Glad

2012-10-21T22:57:00.002+08:00

Just found out one of my besties was heartbroken & got dumped after his long-term relationship. I really didn't see it coming. They were serious in their love-life but it didn't turn as it planned. It's so upsetting because the four of us were like the strongest-long-lasting-couple ever. I'm just glad that my relationship is still holding up pretty well even though there were so many final-warning, break-ups and make-ups over the years. Well, I guess I've charm him. :) You're stuck with me forever. Deal with it. LOL.

i don't know what to do with his fashion nowadays...*burdensome*

Hanoi~

2012-10-20T22:56:00.000+08:00

"Aunty. . . i want to go to Hanoi too. . . TT^TT wuuuuuu"

"Go to Bentong first..."

"Why!"

"People who work under you are not making any progress in selling!"

"But i don't want to go to Bentong! I want to go to Hanoi!!"

"WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY!"

waaaaaaaaaaaaa... i want to go to Hanoi! this is like one-time life chance for me! i've never been overseas before... :(

to imagine this opportunity came and i didn't have the chances to go! arghh! so annoying!

The city of Hanoi in Vietnam...hish! so upsetting!! >.<

Worried About My State of Mind

2012-08-09T23:14:00.000+08:00

Lately, my brain isn't functioning well. I keep forgetting things and mix up words and even getting mood swings. This totally affect my presentation on study because my left brain doesn't do well in Calculus class. I'm so worried it might worsen everyday. I thought maybe it has things to do with not getting a healthy life style. As you can see, majoring in computer science doesn't really involving much movement. All you do is just sit in front of your laptop and do the magic.

Not that I wanna brag or something. Majoring in science computer is a lot of fun, getting a high prescriptive about modern technologies. But if you take science computer just because you think it is easy and just want to make video game, you're dead. It's not easy.

Oh well, nothing to lose, just my mind of course but that doesn't really concern me that much. I keep forgetting stuff, sooner or later I'm bound to forget this entry too. Hmm, seriously, I need help.

What was I talking again?

Fuck. Ok, here's some osiria rose.

Orange Moon Boy

2012-08-05T00:26:00.000+08:00

"If a girl really love someone, they'll never forget him even if that person is no longer with them right now."

Surprisingly, this quote really taken its affect on me. It's because it is true. I won't deny it, I still misses him.

FlashBack~

One evening. That particular evening, you asked me out just to tutor me. Well I accept it because at that time, it didn't seem wrong just to hangout.

It was getting to late and we decided to stop and continue next time. I've finished packing my stuff and about to head my way but you offer to accompany me. I thought it was so nice of you (considering no one have ever done that for me), so I let you walked with me.

On the way, you started to talk nonsense. I thought you just want to be polite or friendly but I never figure you're going to sneak into my heart. You say the most flattering thing a guy should said to a girl. The more we talked, the more I find you intriguing, and surprisingly I slipped something out of my lips.

"You know, you're a nice guy. Every girl would be lucky to have you."
"Why, do you want to be my girl?"
"W-what! I was just--"
"Haha, gotcha. Why are you stuttering? It's just a question, or do you really want to be my girl..."
"Ah, hey look! An orange moon! >.<"
"Nonsense, the moon is not orange. So answer me."
"No seriously! Look!"

He look up in the sky and saw the moon. The moon was orange, like never before.

"You're right, the moon is orange."
"It's so beautiful..."
"Just like you..."

And then the time just froze off. We were just standing there facing each other without uttering a single word. My cheeks are burning like crazy because of his word. But I decided to end it quickly and just say goodbye.

End of FlashBack~

Whenever the moon turns orange, I'll always remember that moment. The moon always look so pretty just like at that time. Remembering it hurts me. Because it made me misses you more. I'm wondering and keep asking myself do you remember me just like I do? Do you misses me like I do? Do you watch the moon that I've adored? Even though times have pass, I've still not forgotten you. But...know this, soon or likely to be I'll forget you. It makes me even sadder when the time comes I will not remember you!

Girls Have Ego Too

2012-08-02T19:22:00.001+08:00

I hate it when I have to admit I'm wrong but actually I'm right. If you think only boys can have egos than you're dead wrong. I have egos to. The worst thing is when you act like it is tough for you but you don't realize it's more tougher on me. You just don't get it until I'll spell it one by one for you.

Today is just the same, why on earth do I have to apologize on something that I didn't do? To comfort you? For you to feel better? That's just not me.

BUT, because of I.L.Y, I have to admit I'm wrong even though it's suffocating me to hurt my own pride. I've sent a text to you to say sorry. Just do your best in the trial-exam and everything is gonna be fine. I hope you'll stop sulking. I'm sorry for the inconvenience we had yesterday.

Best of luck from,

your number 1 stupid lover.

Nana, The Effect...

2012-07-09T15:09:00.001+08:00

Temerloh's Hanging Bridge (1/7/2012)

Urghh...so boring sitting in the dorm doing nothing at all. So I've planned to go to Temerloh with my roommates. Luckily my parents were willing to drive us there. There's only one purpose for going there; that was just to kill time and my boringness of the campus.

The real intetion was to buy our dorm supplies but it turn out to be a shopping-spree for my roommates! One of them can resist buying food for fasting season.

After all the shopping was done, my parent stop by at a food stall near a river. Me and my friends went there and saw a green hanging bridge. So we went there!

under the bridge was a river that was rumored to have a crocodile in it! so high and so fun! :D

Nana, The Effect...

2012-07-03T19:02:00.001+08:00

Crime Prevent Demonstration (30/6/2012)

Today, my university made a program about crime prevention. The police performance was so awesome it literally made me laugh non-stop! I was trying to get a picture with the police but all the police was on duty. I don't want to disturb them so I just take a picture with the banner~

Nana, The Effect...

2012-06-29T18:29:00.001+08:00

New Recipe : Lychee-Grape

Yesterday, two of my roommates were fasting. So we went to canteen to but our food. When we were about to buy water, my friend start trolling me.

"We want cincau tea!" They all shouted.

"I want cincau lychee!", said Ged.

"I want cincau grape!", said Ika.

"No! I want lychee-grape!", said Farah.

Suddenly the abang DM was willing to fulfill Farah's wish. So she get her lychee-grape! We were so shocked, and then one by one asked for the same drink.

The reason why I've said they were trolling me was because, the other day, went we went to buy lunch, I've ordered cincau tea. Surprisingly, they never heard of that drink. So they started trolling me when we went to the canteen!

Looks weird right? but it taste so awesome! When you take out the lychee, it turn into purple! :D

In the end, that's how the recipe of Lychee-Grape was created.

Nana, The Effect...

2012-06-26T17:33:00.000+08:00

Water Inccident

Today my roommates decided to do a little 'experiment' on a balloon. A couple of days earlier I blew a red balloon (don't ask where the balloon come from) because of boredom. Then Ged took the balloon and drew on it with our names, class, room number, and lots of ducks! After a few day the balloon started to shrink, so the drawing shrink too, so me and Ged decided to save the balloon by filling it with water!

We giggled so much knowing how funny the balloon when we shake and squeezed it! It even had a tiny hole! After making a mess, Farah, Albi, Ged and me decided to get more messy. We want to burst the balloon! So we took a pale (Ged's pale) and decided to throw the balloon in the pale! Farah got the first try but it didn't work. Then Ged step up. She throw the balloon like she was doing a shot put. The balloon exploded! And so did Ged's pale. The mouth of the pale was chipped off. And not to mention the mess in the hall. It was wet!!

Nana, The Effect...

2012-06-26T11:25:00.001+08:00

BEL311 Essay?

Yesterday my BEL lect asked us to write an essay. So he asked us to think one or two topics to write about. At first, we wrote about CATS. But then, when we think we did it wrong so we changed the topic to DRUG ABUSE. Suddenly he came by and said it to change it to the topic that are interested to us. So he ask us what topic that interested us. Me and Ged were like 'FOOD'! then he ask, 'oh! like what to cook?' And we said, 'nope, what to eattt!'

Seriously, we don't need to cook. hahaha. Lastly we ended with the topic SEXUAL HARASSMENT! Yup, this topic is interesting to us. Sexual Harassmer/Pengharass. haha!