The Absolute Peach

TAP Series 5 Episode 11: Jets & Crets

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 12:45:00 GMT

Ben must be kind of a big deal. Not only has he been jet-setting the length of the country, but he's even received an advance copy of brand new music by an up and coming artist. Joe meanwhile, almost ran over a dog on his bike.

TAP Series 5 Episode 10: Eye Tests & Cereal

Sat, 31 Oct 2009 00:44:00 GMT

Ben went and got his eyes tested recently, and it started him thinking. Meanwhile, Joe has been researching "interesting facts", there's listener submitted Chav Watch, and the return of a classic segment from the early days of TAP.

TAP Series 5 Episode 09: Nudity & Navigation

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 13:38:00 GMT

In this week's show we catch up on part of the mountain of listener feedback we've been getting recently. We jump into some news, talk about movies, Ben recounts getting lost in Bournemouth, and even touch on the latest developments in The X Factor.

TAP Series 5 Episode 08: Slap & Chop

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 14:32:00 GMT

This week, we talk about a brand new (to us) miracle kitchen device that could revolutionise the world of Joe Cuisine. We hear about Ben's recent mountaineering trip to Wales, talk briefly about movies and even find time for brand new Chav Watch.

TAP Series 5 Episode 07: Barbers & Babies

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 13:55:00 GMT

This week's varied show features a unique Chav Watch in which Ben is the star. We also talk about induced labour, there's new Squirrel News and your emails.

TAP Series 5 Episode 06: Meryl & The Beast

Fri, 25 Sep 2009 13:00:00 GMT

We're back with a vengeance after a week's break. Joe gets called out on his recent behaviour, and Ben comes clean with a brand new Map of Shame. There's more Joe Cuisine and Chav Watch, and we even find time to talk about movies and read out some of your emails.

TAP Series 5 Episode 05: Tooting & The Two Egg Special

Fri, 11 Sep 2009 13:50:00 GMT

On this show, Joe explains why at the ripe old age of 27, he still can’t drive a car. We hear an audio review of the show, discuss the diversity of our listenership, and round it all off with what might be the best (or worst) Joe Cuisine idea so far.

TAP Series 5 Episode 04: Dinner & Dancing

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 14:00:00 GMT

This show is packed to bursting with classic TAP moments. A caffeine-charged Ben defends the manliness of taking his wife to a musical, and comes under fire for his recent "dinner party" habits. Meanwhile, it's a bumper week for Chav Watch, and we are even treated to another helping of Bee News.

TAP Series 5 Episode 03: Hot Dates & Honey Bees

Fri, 28 Aug 2009 14:20:00 GMT

Three shows in and the Peach is firing on all cylinders! This show has personal stories, news, arguments and everything else you love about TAP. Joe shares a story of a late-night rendezvous and we learn about the magic of honey making.

TAP Series 5 Episode 02: Splashdowns & Aristocrats

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 15:50:00 GMT

Ben's been to a waterpark and has come back with an injury and a new catchphrase for the show. Meanwhile Lord Joe has discovered the joys of tea drinking, we hear an audio message from a fan and read out a bunch of your emails.

TAP Series 5 Episode 01: Snails & Stairwells

Sat, 15 Aug 2009 01:25:00 GMT

Ben and Joe reenter the studio for the hotly anticipated fifth series of The Absolute Peach. We kick things off with a show that's packed with personal stories and your emails so plug in, sit back and enjoy.

TAP Mini Shows Episode 06: Women

Fri, 17 Jul 2009 20:30:00 GMT

The subject of this, the final Mini Show before the start of Series 5, has been tackled plenty of times on The Absolute Peach. But never have we had the privilege of having an actual female on the show. This week, that all changes. Joining us in the studio for this very special Mini Show is none other than Ben's wife! New listeners: this is different from our normal shows. We recommend checking out Series 4 for an authentic taste of the Peach!

TAP Mini Shows Episode 05: Health

Wed, 15 Jul 2009 14:00:00 GMT

In this show we talk about the issue of health, and why it's important to watch what you eat and exercise regularly. Wow, that makes it sound boring! New listeners: this is different from our normal shows. We recommend checking out Series 4 for an authentic taste of the Peach!

TAP Mini Shows Episode 04: Childhood

Sat, 11 Jul 2009 00:51:00 GMT

In this show we take a trip back in time to our childhood, and Ben recounts an embarrassing experience from his school days. New listeners: this is different from our normal shows. We recommend checking out Series 4 for an authentic taste of the Peach!

TAP Mini Shows Episode 03: Food

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:20:00 GMT

It's a food themed show with a unique TAP spin. We kick off the show by delving into a big box of goodies sent in by a fan from overseas, and end up talking about mexican baby food. New listeners: this is different from our normal shows. We recommend checking out Series 4 for an authentic taste of the Peach!

TAP Mini Shows Episode 02: Technology

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 20:08:00 GMT

In our second mini show, we're talking about a topic of some debate amongst the TAP team: technology. It's 15 minutes of classic Joe versus Ben! New listeners: this is different from our normal shows. We recommend checking out Series 4 for an authentic taste of the Peach!

TAP Mini Shows Episode 01: Travel

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 00:19:00 GMT

In this, the first of six 15 minute shows to be released before the start of Series 5, Ben and Joe talk about travel. At least, Joe does. Ben's brain appears to have gone into meltdown and isn't making much sense. In that respect it's sort of a role reversal. Hiyo! New listeners: this episode is different from our normal shows. We recommend checking out Series 4 for an authentic taste of the Peach!

TAP Series 4 Episode 20: Salutes & Series Finales

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 13:30:00 GMT

For our last show in the series, we put the focus primarily on you, the fans. A lot of this episode is about hearing and responding to the great feedback we've received from listeners about this series, both long-term and brand new. Of course, it wouldn't be a proper finale without our original brand of TAP stories, rants and arguments, and we even bring back some classic segments from shows gone by. Enjoy this feature-length finale and get ready for what's coming to you - Series 5!

TAP Series 4 Episode 19: Steep Hills & Map Skills

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 18:00:00 GMT

A feature length, surprise roundup show where we bring you all the details of 'The Absolute Trek' bike trip, plus your emails and voicemails.

TAP Series 4 Episode 18: Fish & Twits

Fri, 05 Jun 2009 23:00:00 GMT

Ben and Joe have been fishing. How do you think that worked out? Well, in this show we let you know. We also hear about a man who literally ran into trouble, and talk about our upcoming cycling trip.

TAP Series 4 Episode 17: Chatrooms & Choices

Fri, 29 May 2009 16:00:00 GMT

Happy Friday! This week we delve a little further into Ben's dark past as he recounts his teenage years in internet chatrooms, and the mechanics of chat-based comedy. Luckily it's not all geek, since a listener email forces him to make some tricky decisions. There's also Chav Watch, and a warning about the dangers of listening to the show whilst exercising.

TAP Series 4 Episode 16: Fiddling & Furniture Stores

Fri, 22 May 2009 14:00:00 GMT

Ben's discovered he has a problem, and this week he shares it with you. We also talk about the games we played as kids, and critique what might be the strangest furniture store advert ever.

TAP Series 4 Episode 15: Characters & Trouser Birds

Fri, 15 May 2009 14:00:00 GMT

This show we get a little more personal and talk about our characters, and how we're percieved by our listeners. There's also Chav Watch, arguments about the wireless, and we hear about a man with birds in his trousers.

TAP Series 4 Episode 14: Clowns & Cretmeisters

Fri, 08 May 2009 14:10:00 GMT

We're back for our second show of the week! We hear about a woman who feeds her babies McDonald's, respond to some emails, and talk about some of the awesome fan art we've been sent recently. There's even a delicious new recipe from Joe Cuisine. And somewhere in there is some talk about clowns, and also some about Cretmeisters. Confused? Fire up the show!

TAP Series 4 Episode 13: Head Shapes & Skulking

Wed, 06 May 2009 12:50:00 GMT

Last week we took a week off, because Joe was skulking around theme parks with scant regard for the show. That's right, scant. But now we're back with this surprise Wednesday show to make your midweek special.

TAP Series 4 Episode 12: Flash & Burn

Fri, 24 Apr 2009 22:20:00 GMT

The reason for our out-of-sorts show intro is that Joe had taken it upon himself to get involved in the production of the show. It won't happen again. An actor, a flasher and a candlestick maker are just some of the treats we have lined up for you this week. OK, that last one was made up. Enjoy the show.

TAP Series 4 Episode 11: Captain Petard & The Grand National

Fri, 17 Apr 2009 14:00:00 GMT

In this varied show, we hear about Joe's recent street fighting experience, talk about movies and criminals, and end up struggling to comprehend the latest snivelling apology from the BBC.

TAP Series 4 Episode 10: Bad Jokes & Fast Foods

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 16:15:00 GMT

Ben's ill, and isn't quite himself. Despite this, we still bring you a show. This week, we talk about Joe's brain, hamburgers, and The Apprentice.

TAP Series 4 Episode 09: Bruce Willis & The Sciurine Invasion

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 15:35:00 GMT

Just from the title, you know this show is going to be good. Joe has possibly the most ludicrous squirrel news ever, we hear about a would-be shelf stacker action hero, and Ben reports on the results of last week's "normality challenge".

TAP Series 4 Episode 08: Pop Rocks & Orlando Jo

Fri, 27 Mar 2009 18:30:00 GMT

Crackly Pop Rocks are fun to eat on the mic, but we balance things out with some serious talk on pigs, and why our very own Jamie Oliver is coming under fire for not telling the world to become vegetarian. Also, Joe shares his dreams of farming, and how he has reinvented himself as 'Orlando Jo'.

TAP Series 4 Episode 07: Friendships & Squirrels

Fri, 20 Mar 2009 14:30:00 GMT

Sometimes you just have to sit down and talk it out. This show is all about getting some serious Ben and Joe time. Ok, it's also a bit about squirrels, but mainly it's about close friendships between two men, and if it can get "too close for comfort", as Ben sometimes says. You will love this show.

TAP Series 4 Episode 06: Lame Gifts & Grease Fests

Sat, 14 Mar 2009 13:00:00 GMT

It's always awkward when you're given a gift that's awesome, and you reciprocate with, well, crap. At least not everyone in the world knows about it. Oh wait. Speaking of crap, Ben reports back on a less than satisfactory dinner experience, and Joe shares a sob story from his visit to capital city.

TAP Series 4 Episode 05: Thai Brides & Child Prizes

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 13:00:00 GMT

This week we hear the latest in our romance scam saga, find out how to win ourselves a toddler, and there's brand new Joe Cuisine. Plus, Joe shares his history with Thai Brides.

TAP Series 4 Episode 04: Man Drinks & Wash Names

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 13:00:00 GMT

Happy Pancake Friday! This week Ben and Joe argue about drink choices, forbidden words, and an email to Ben reveals that Joe's not the only one the ladies love.

TAP Series 4 Episode 03: Morony & MicroCaves

Fri, 13 Feb 2009 14:00:00 GMT

Never mind Slumdog Millionnaire; Ben's got his own rags to riches story. There's also brand new Joe Cuisine and Chav Watch, and we even find time to start a brand new trend. 'Zorz.

TAP Series 4 Episode 02: Pigeon Travel & Tramp Communication

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 13:00:00 GMT

Catch the pigeon? Not likely. These pigeons are in jumbo jets! Plus, Joe's met a tramp who's better off than he is, and we revive a favourite segment from days gone by.

TAP Series 4 Episode 01: Sleazy & Sneezy

Fri, 30 Jan 2009 12:55:00 GMT

Four months after Series 3 drew to a close, TAP is finally back in the saddle with a kick-off show that's more fun than a pool party with rabid monkeys where you're the towel boy. Enjoy! Oh, and you can now follow us on Twitter: http://twitter.com/absolutepeach

TAP Series 3 Highlight Shows: 4 of 4

Wed, 17 Dec 2008 01:15:00 GMT

The fourth, and final instalment of The Absolute Peach highlight shows has finally arrived, and brings with it a special announcement...

TAP Series 3 Highlight Shows: 3 of 4

Mon, 01 Dec 2008 00:11:00 GMT

Ben hosts another collection of the best clips from Series 3. This week: episodes 11 to 15.

TAP Series 3 Highlight Shows: 2 of 4

Mon, 10 Nov 2008 12:20:00 GMT

The second episode in our magical adventures through Series 3 of The Absolute Peach. Not so much magical as 'nostalgical'. And probably more tours than adventures. Yeah, let's go with that. This week: episodes 6 to 10.

TAP Series 3 Highlight Shows: 1 of 4

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 18:15:00 GMT

Ben hosts this 4-part mini-series, bringing you some of the best bits from Series 3. This week: episodes 1 to 5.

TAP Series 3 Episode 20 - Floor Kings & Endings

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 22:30:00 GMT

Some folk think all that's needed in order to be successful is a talking animal. Perhaps that's what we're missing on The Absolute Peach. Should we dress up a mangy dog in kingly robes and a crown? Is that what the world wants? Let's ask Beatrix Potter. That doesn't make much sense at all, but this is the end of the series, and if it was boring and sensible you'd never forgive us. Thanks for being awesome. We'll see you soon.

TAP Series 3 Episode 19 - PJs & Roller Discos

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 13:30:00 GMT

This week we discover Joe's dark history of 90s music and roller skating, talk about the latest Disney movie, and reveal Ben's shameful eating habits of late. Plus: should a man say the word 'jammies'? Find out right here, folks.

TAP Series 3 Episode 18 - Miracles & Fat

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 14:00:00 GMT

This show kicks off with drama as Ben makes a shocking discovery about a meal he ate last week. Joe tells of how he's been dreaming about how great he is, and we review some of the worst TV adverts of recent times. Hey, hey, I wanna be a rock star.

TAP Series 3 Episode 17 - Handwash & Hog Calling

Fri, 15 Aug 2008 14:30:00 GMT

We do a lot of things here on The Absolute Peach. But there's one subject which has always been close to our hearts. This show, we present to you some of the most idiotic people ever to grace the TAP airwaves. To add to the fun, some guy has been parking outside Ben's garage and he's not happy about it.

TAP Series 3 Episode 16 - Game Freaks & Mystery Meats

Fri, 08 Aug 2008 11:30:00 GMT

This week, we talk about words that men just shouldn't say. Along the way, Ben gets grilled about his past gaming life, we learn what our names say about us, and Joe has a list of meats. Don't ask.

TAP Series 3 Episode 15 - Chubby Chicks & Dark Knights

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 10:00:00 GMT

The new Batman movie's out. Have you seen it? Yeah, it's been out ages. The Joker is amazing. Yeah, I know. But he is though. Yeah. Cool movie. Yep. Chubby chicks in bikinis. What?

TAP Series 3 Episode 14 - Moaning Fans & Ice Cream Vans

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Ooh, I don't like where this is going! I'm mildly scared that this is the end! The Peach has crossed a line! Has it? Or did we just decide to do a short show last week? A word to the Worrying Winnies: Stop it. TAP isn't going anywhere. So smile, dear listeners, and enjoy this feature-length show.

TAP Series 3 Episode 13 - Short & Sweet

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Have you ever heard the saying, "It's not quantity but quality that counts"? Well, this week's episode of The Peach has neither quantity nor quality. Ok, that's not 100% true. Let's just say it does exactly what it says on the tin. And by tin we mean title.

TAP Series 3 Episode 12 - Reviews & Racism

Fri, 11 Jul 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Ever noticed how racism is just like a bad movie? No, neither have we. The main topics covered in this week's show could hardly be more different. Yet TAP weaves them into one show so expertly, you'll barely notice the seams. Plus: you love intro songs, and this week we've got not one, but two just for you. We're awesome.

TAP Series 3 Episode 11 - Sleepless Nights & Fashion Faux Pas

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 13:00:00 GMT

We're back from an unannounced week off and Joe gets the blame. We pay tribute to our American cousins and Ben tells of his most stressful and hideously awkward moments of recent times.

TAP Series 3 Episode 10 - Emails & Mediocrity

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 21:00:00 GMT

As shows go, this one's awesome. And by awesome we mean awful. And by that we mean it's fairly average. You decide. And it's late. Maybe TAP got lazy? Lazy, lazy TAP. Enjoy the show.

TAP Series 3 Episode 09 - Geeks & Emos

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Have you ever seen a man who was so white and thin that you thought he was a ghost of some sort? Ben has...but it wasn't a ghost, it was an emo buying his lunch. Our thoughts on this strange man and some geeks too. Brilliant.

TAP Series 3 Episode 08 - Apples & Apologies

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Sometimes you just have to be a man. Sometimes you have to swallow your pride, look somebody right in the eye, and say 'I'm sorry'. Ben's a real man, and this show he proves it. Joe meanwhile, is more interested in the rate at which his fruit decomposes.

TAP Series 3 Episode 07 - Songs & Sickness

Fri, 30 May 2008 15:00:00 GMT

Ben and Joe have been ill all week and are still feeling rough. Luckily, a surprise arrives to cheer them up. We also talk about daytime TV, words that don't get used anymore, and it's a bumper week for Chav Watch and Map of Shame.

TAP Series 3 Episode 06 - Accents & Aeroplanes

Fri, 23 May 2008 15:00:00 GMT

What's the first rule of Intro Club? What's up with pilots these days? And why are all Joe's stories about Bulls recently? We also discuss the wonderful diversity of accents used in our fine country, and Ben tells of how he was accosted by a 12-year-old.

TAP Series 3 Episode 05 - Gladiators & Cheese

Fri, 16 May 2008 15:00:00 GMT

Do you feel the power of the Gladiators? No? Neither do we. Gladiators these days are too soft, with their lycra and padded pugils. We discuss an idea for a new twist on the Gladiators formula, and also get into some cheese talk. Between Gladiators and cheese, this show has something for everyone.

TAP Series 3 Episode 04 - Cheques & Contestants

Fri, 02 May 2008 13:00:00 GMT

There's nothing quite like blind optimism, and there's plenty in this week's show. We cover the latest poor fools whose bad ideas landed them in international humiliation. Plus, no episode would be complete without Joe trying something and Ben sabotaging it.

TAP Series 3 Episode 03 - JailBulls & Arrogance

Fri, 25 Apr 2008 15:30:00 GMT

This show we talk about Mexico's dubious legal practices, shooting each other, and how you can get prosecuted for staring. There's also your emails and a story about an arrogant pilot.

TAP Series 3 Episode 02 - Scraps & Surgery

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 14:00:00 GMT

We've all met them. Those people who just want to sniff around the tables of others, hoping that some scraps will fall onto their heads, metaphorically speaking. As it turns out, Joe used to know someone who did literally that, literally speaking. Plus we talk about an exciting new form of surgery.

TAP Series 3 Episode 01 - Sport Pies & Croissants

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 14:00:00 GMT

We're back! Series 3 promises to be the biggest series yet for The Absolute Peach and we're kicking things off with a cracker, I mean pie, err, croissant... just listen to the show. Enjoy!