Irina Shayk attended the premiere of All Is Lost at Cannes on Wednesday wearing a kick-ass dress. Mostly because half of it was missing. It’s like some pervert went into her dressing room and went to town on her dress with a pair of scissors. Hey, why are you looking at me?

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I’m not sure why one of Vin Diesel’s fingernails is black. Theories?

• Jennifer Love Hewitt covers Women’s Running: ‘It helps the badonk-a-donk!’ [Celebitchy]
• Lea Michele is fashionable [Celebslam]
• Eva Longoria Bikini Envy [CityRag]
• Isabeli Fontana hot for Vogue Paris (Site NSFW) [Drunken Stepfather]
• Sharon Stone wore this dress to Cannes[IDLYITW]
• X Factor Is Counting Coins So It Can Keep the Lights On [AmyGrindhouse]
• Maria Menounos vs Lucy Hale. Who ya got? [MoeJackson]
• Tornado survivor finds missing dog during interview [Hollywood Rag]
• Paulina Gretzky bikini of the week [Busted Coverage]
• Kim Kardashian Selfish For Taking Baby On Kanye West Tour, Slams Kourtney Kardashian [CDL]
• President Obama’s 1979 Prom Pic Hits Interwebs [Popcrunch]
• The New York Times tries to give January Jones a personality [Lainey]
• Frances Bean Cobain slammed Kendall Jenner [Popbytes]
• Big Ang Dishes On Marriage, Renee Graziano, And Season Two Of Her Spin-Off Which Premieres In September! [Realitytea]
• 5 ‘American Gladiators’ Events That Delivered Pain [VIDEO] [GuyCodeBlog]
• “Fast & Furious 6? Movie Review [GossipOnThis]
• A chat with Katie Aselton and Lake Bell (“Black Rock”)  [Bullz-Eye]
• Benedict Cumberbatch’s Shirtless Deleted ‘Star Trek Into Darkness’ Shower Scene [SocialiteLife]

The post The Rest of the Web, Thursday, 05.23.13 appeared first on The Blemish.

In Touch posted EXCLUSIVE pictures of Amanda Bynes’ NYC apartment during one of her parties. The photographers at the party say she just smokes weed all day. As if that’s some revelation. Have you seen her Twitter?

“She probably gets so high that sometimes she won’t even leave her house,” claims photographer Giovanni Arnold, who was also at Amanda’s apartment that night along with “Joe.” “One minute she’s cool and down-to-earth. The next, she’s totally di fferent — indecisive, and she can’t hold a conversation,” he tells In Touch. “Mentally, she’s all over the place.”

The two photogs, Joe and Giovanni, said there was weed all over the apartment.

“Weed was everywhere,” says Giovanni. “On the bed, all over the floor.” Giovanni also alleges she did cocaine when they were at her place, although Amanda denies it, telling In Touch, “They’re the ones into drugs, so they bring drugs, but I don’t do them.”

They also talk about Amanda’s living situation which can be described as sparse. Except for all that weed of course.

“Her living room is basically empty,” describes “Joe.” Blinds hang on three windows near her bed, while the other windows are spray-painted black.

Well, at least she has blinds. In any case, Amanda has responded to the photos and article saying they’re all lies. Digitally altered lies! Can she tell by the pixels? No, she can tell by the toes.

That’s not my bed! Those aren’t my toes! My toes are pedicured! I just did an exclusive interview with intouch last week, now they bought fake altered photos by that ugly black man in the photo or someone who knows him! They used an old shot of me on the cover with a bad angle of my old nose before I had surgery to reshape my profile and to remove the webbing from my eyes. I have to sue because that’s not my apartment, those aren’t my clothes! They morphed photos of my face onto someone’s body to ruin my life! I have to make a big deal of this and sue because that’s not me! I care about my appearance so I have to defend myself! I look like a different person now that I had surgery! Why did they put an old shot of me on the cover? I don’t look like that anymore! I only want photos of my gorgeous new nose on the cover of tabloids and real magazines! The photos in this issue are fake and mocked up! I don’t care enough to keep talking about it. Just assume that I fucked the boyfriend of the editor of intouch because they fucking hate me!

Guys. You know what you have to do. Drop everything and back away slowly from Amanda Bynes. I’m not saying Amanda is crazy but let’s just say this rubber stamp they’re stamping her paperwork with does not say “picture of sanity.”

This ugly faced woman @jessicafinnnyc is the one who bought fake photos of me & put that picture that looks nothing like me on the cover!

— Amanda Bynes (@AmandaBynes) May 23, 2013

The post Amanda Bynes Suing In Touch for Drug Den Photos, Wants Her Real Nose to be Shown appeared first on The Blemish.

Here’s the red band trailer for We’re The Millers where Jennifer Aniston plays a stripper. Mind you, she’s 44 so either there’s a lot of movie magic involved or she works the 2 pm shift.

Anyway, the film also stars Jason Sudeikis, Emma Roberts and Ed Helms. Sudeikis plays a weed dealer who has to pick up a shipment of weed from Mexico for Ed Helms. Apparently the best way to sneak across the border with metric tons of weed is in a RV pretending everyone on board is one happy family. Aniston plays the wife and Emma Roberts plays the kid.

Surprisingly, Aniston’s stripper character seems fresher and less broken than all the other 40-year-old strippers out there. She must really love her job.

NSFW for language, testicles and of course TLC references.

The post Wanna See Jennifer Aniston Try to be a Stripper? appeared first on The Blemish.

Carmen Electra really needs no introduction. You know her from Baywatch but probably best from that poster you had hanging over your bed in college. Recently, she’s restarted her music career. Here she tells us a little bit about her new track and punching sharks in the nose.

You’ve been in the entertainment industry for a while. How’s it feel to last this long?
Persistence is the key to longevity. If you want something bad enough you will work hard until you get it. Plus I have the best fans ever and it’s their support that helps me keep pushing!

You’ve done TV, movies, modeling and now music. Which has been your favorite?
I can’t choose one over the other. I feel music is your own expression, in movies you’re playing a role and modeling is sort of like painting a picture.

If a child was drowning, could you use your Baywatch knowledge to save them?
I did learn CPR on the show. If anyone was in danger, I would try to help, especially if it was a child. But lets face it – truth is my lifeguard skills aren’t great so I may try to save someones life and end up drowning in the process.

What if they were about to be attacked by a shark? Would you punch it in the nose? The shark, not the child.
As a huge fan of shark week, I have learned that you are supposed to hit them in the nose (the shark, not the child!), but I would probably grab a real lifeguard to do the dirty work!

You’re restarting your music career. How did that come about?
It all started with a handful of people who believed in me and were constantly saying “you love music, this is what you want, just do it!” so I decided to give it a shot in a very low-key home studio. There was no pressure, we were just having fun. It didn’t truly set in until I was booked for my first performances of “I Like It Loud,” in NYC.

What kind of music do you listen to? What’s your favorite genre?
It depends on my mood. Sometimes hiphop, dance music, rock or heavy metal. Different music motivates me in different ways – its whatever I’m feeling at the time.

You have a follow-up song to I Like it Loud called Bigger Dick. Did you do extensive research on this?
HAHAHA!! No. Maybe you have the wrong idea about the song!

What’s the message of the song? I mean, no one likes a braggart.
This has nothing to do with bragging, I am so not that kind of person. Its saying I’m not going to be passive anymore, so if someone is mistreating you, get the courage to do something about it and stand up for yourself.

So when can we expect your album to drop?
Currently in the studio recording!

Out of all the celebrity competition shows (DWTS, Splash, The Apprentice, etc) which would you most rather do and how do you think you’d fare?
I would be more interested in shooting a reality show than being on a competition show. I was entered into dance competitions from the ages of 5 to 17 so it feels more exciting to try something different!

Say you were told you had 24 hours to live, what would be the last thing you’d do and what would be the last thing you’d eat?
I would have a raging party with all my friends and family and I would eat lots of sweets and go out celebrating life! I would definitely go out with a bang!

Any future projects, besides music, coming up?
I just finished shooting 2 movies, “The Book of Fire,” and “Monica,” and I am about to head to Vienna to perform in the Life Ball.

You can keep up with Carmen Electra on Twitter and Instagram. Photo by Jonathan Clay Harris.

The post Carmen Electra Talks New Music, Fending Off Sharks and the Future appeared first on The Blemish.

Those epileptic attacks must have really messed up Lil Wayne’s head because he and Cash Money just signed Paris Hilton to a record contract. Expect a new album in the near future which will reportedly be produced by Afrojack and feature stars like Lil Wayne.

If you still haven’t scrubbed Stars Are Blind from your brain, you’ll be happy to know her new album will focus on house music. Meaning, you probably won’t have to listen to the nails on a chalkboard she calls her voice.

Unless she does end up singing on it. Which would be horrible. Imagine a bat screeching into your ear combined with non-stop “pew pew pew pepeepepew pew pews pews.” It’ll probably replace waterboarding as the government’s preferred interrogation tactic.

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Following her crotch slip at Canne’s, Eva Longoria got her master’s degree in Chicano Studies from California State University Northridge on Wednesday. She’s had a roller coaster week. Eva tweeted, ”Very excited to graduate for my Master’s degree in Chicano Studies! You’re never too old or too busy to continue your education!”

Did anyone even know she was going to school? This isn’t one of those honorary degrees is it? Because that would be kind of racist.

Though by the sound of it, it seems like Eva may have actually worked for it. She told E! a while ago that she was working on her thesis.

The post Eva Longoria Got Her Masters appeared first on The Blemish.

You were probably wondering to yourself the other day how Lindsay Lohan was doing in rehab. Well, not very well. A source tells Radar that the fact Lindsay doesn’t want to be there is not helping with her recovery.

She also looks extremely haggard with a bloated face and unkempt hair. They add that she’s already gained 5 pounds and she can’t stop eating.

Someone just needs to get on the bullhorn like a negotiator talking a guy down from a ledge and shout at her, “Put the fork down, fatty!”

The post Lindsay Lohan Is Bloated and Haggard appeared first on The Blemish.

Morgan Freeman, 75, and Michael Caine, 80, were promoting Now You See Me on KCPQ Seattle yesterday and it was going great until Morgan Freeman started nodding off.

Grandpa over there tried the old “I look like I’m in deep thought, but I’m actually sleeping” move you used in school but the involuntary twitching, the hallmark of dozing off, gave it away.

This is why whenever I interview old people, I always make sure to bring a stick. That way I can poke them to make sure they’re still alive. “Hey, Grandpa! Are you still with us?!,” I’d yell at them while jabbing at their ribs.

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The trailer for Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s Don Jon starring himself, Scarlett Johansson, Tony Danza and Julianne Moore was just released. The film, which premiered at Sundance, is about porn and chick flicks creating unrealistic expectations in relationships. Though I like to think it’s more about seeing Scarlett Johansson in tight clothes. Boingoingoing!

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