The Blemish

Web finds

The Blemish — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 16:17:05 +0000

Did Conan O’Brien just use everyone? [Popeater]
The cast of Jersey Shore can’t drink? [The Superficial]
David Beckham is loosing again. [PopSugar]
Jason Lewis wants to take a shower with you. [Socialite's Life]
Joe Montana’s son tag-teams some chick. [Drunken Stepfather]
Gerard Butler trimmed Jennifer Aniston’s bush. [Huffington Post]
Kendra Wilkinson is smart. [IDLYITW]

Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler are together again

The Blemish — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 01:23:13 +0000

Expect tabloids tomorrow to run these photos next to the headline “Aniston and Butler Back On!” Then two days later run a story about how Butler was hooking up with two blonde chicks at a club. Then they’ll say how devastated Aniston is. Then Aniston will say, “What the hell are you talking about? This never happened.” Then she’ll go home and cry. The end.

[Images: Bauer-Griffin]

Michelle Branch does Inked

The Blemish — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:20:33 +0000

Michelle Branch is in the newest issue of Inked. Some type of tattoo or calligraphy magazine. I haven’t heard from this chick in a while. She looks a little hotter though. Not by much, but the new tattoos really do it for me. One of them anyway. Let this be a note to you chicks. Get the right tattoo and I’ll maybe have sex with you. That’s a promise!

Afternoon time wasters

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 22:04:48 +0000

Richard Belzer will choke a bitch. [Popeater]
Heidi Klum is pimping Project Runway. [Celebitchy]
Kristen Stewart gets leggy. [Popoholic]
Beer bra for the win. [College Candy]

Victoria Beckham is upset over Corey Haim’s death. [Wonderwall]
Lady Gaga is crazy. [Bossip]
Wino is a fashion designer now. [Dlisted]
Gemma Atkinson busts out her lingerie. [Egotastic]

Biel makes the bj face. [IDLYITW]
Rawr. Sexy chick fight. [Celebslam]
Carrie Prejean should never have kids. [LitelySalted]
Kat Von D is a hot mess. [Daily Fix]

Heidi Montag has a new manager

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:31:23 +0000

Spencer Pratt will no longer serve as Heidi Montag’s manager. Pratt, who has mismanaged himself and Heidi for almost five years, has been replaced by someone with far more experience and know-how. A psychic. Heidi replaced Spencer with a psychic. She might as well have bought a magic 8-ball and used that to manage her career.

“After the incredible experiences I have had healing my life and truly connecting to my dreams with healer intuitive Aiden Chase, I have officially asked him to become my manager,” Montag says. “Having an intuitive psychic leading my team gives me an edge no one else has.”
“No longer is my husband the face of my business or managing my career,” she adds. “I am going to have Aiden Chase help manage my new life and career in a very different and positive way with light and love. The time for change is now. Never mix business and pleasure. We are no longer Speidi but Spencer and Heidi.”

That psychic is ripping them off. If he were a real psychic, he would have already told them there’s no way in hell they’d make it in Hollywood and that maybe Heidi should try porn or something.

This is a big deal

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:50:52 +0000

Let me finish your sentence, 12-year-old girl. AieeeeyooooouuuuuuU!

Chris Brown fighting for relevancy

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:58:50 +0000

Through SayNow.com, Chris Brown recorded a message to his fans begging them to “bring me back” (audio via TMZ here). Brown continues, “a lot of radio stations aren’t playing my records. They are not being that supportive and I wouldn’t expect them to.”

Of course, the memory of that asshat punching Rihanna in the face a couple hundred times is still fresh in people’s minds. But Brown says he’s changed and is “a better guy now” and that his music won’t be possible if he’s not relevant. Translation: his money is running out.

Amazing. The needle on my pity meter didn’t even go past 0. Who’s really going to miss his music? The last thing I heard from Chris was a 3 minute song about Double Mint Gum. If I wanted to hear that, I’d just watch tv for the commercials.

[Images: INF]

Corey Feldman gets another 15 minutes

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:17:23 +0000

With the recent passing of Corey Haim, it became the perfect opportunity for Corey Feldman to get on tv and voice his dissatisfaction with Hollywood. Feldman showed up to Larry King yesterday and whined about how child actors, specifically him and Haim, were treated. He also says we should outlaw making fun of people.

“Where were all these people the last 10 years, the last 15 years, of Corey’s life,” Feldman, 38, asked. “Where were all these people to lend a handout, to reach out to him and say, you’re a legend, you’re an amazingly talented wonderful person who’s never really gone out of his way to hurt anyone, other than himself?”
“In this entertainment industry, in Hollywood, we build people up as children, we put them on pedestals, and then, when we decide they’re not marketable anymore, we walk away from them,” he added. “Then we taunt them and we tease them … It’s okay for society as a whole to poke fun at, to point fingers at, us as human beings. Why is it okay to kick somebody when they’re down? I don’t think it should be tolerated anymore.”

Uh oh. Someone call the wahmbulance. What Feldman doesn’t understand is Hollywood isn’t an adoptive parent there to support you until death. Hollywood first and foremost is a business and much like any business, you get dropped when you outlive your usefulness. Just because you get a taste of fortune and fame doesn’t mean you deserve it forever. This is why you don’t see Apple or Microsoft giving handouts to people they’ve fired. Actors are such babies. They live in their own little world where everybody should worship them when they haven’t done anything to deserve it. Oh, excuse me. You were in Lost Boys. Allow me to lay my body across this puddle so you don’t step in it.

Conan is going on tour

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:20:00 +0000

Conan O’Brien just announced his 32 city The Legally Prohibited from Being Funny on Television Tour with Andy Richter which promises to be a night of music, comedy, hugging and the occasional awkward silence. While there’s no guarantee it’ll be any of those things, there is a guarantee that it will be half-assed.

Even if all he does is sit on stage stabbing pins into a Jay Leno voodoo doll and sobbing, it’ll probably be funny because it’s Conan.

Get your tickets here if interested.

Tiger Woods is cheap

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:46:58 +0000

Jamie Jungers, Jaimee Grubbs and Loredana Jolie (former exes of Tiger Woods) competed for $75,000 and a black diamond ring on Howard Stern’s Mistress Pageant. Jamie Jungers eventually took first place while a pissed off Grubbs took second and a $15k consolation prize.

Jungers won with her sob story and her “Tiger is a cheap ass” story. From the NYDN:

Perhaps it was her Oscar-worthy sob story – instead of dishing on the nitty-gritty like the other ladies (“He should envy a 9-iron,” Grubbs laughed), Jungers choked back tears as she said, “I loved him. … I did,” while insisting it “wasn’t about the money.”
In fact, the blond bombshell shared some interesting facts about the golfer and his green: Not only did Woods fly her coach when she was going to visit him, but he also never tipped waitstaff.
“It embarrassed me,” she sighed. “He always expected things to be complimentary.”

I’ve always been confused by people with money not tipping. It’s like the more they have the cheaper they get. If I had Tiger Woods money, I’d be tipping at least 25%. And if the the waitress was hot with big tits and bent over a lot in a low cut top, I’d tip with a diamond ring and a marriage proposal.

[Images: INF]

Whitney Port is bikini relaxing

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:19:38 +0000

What’s sad is that reality stars like Whitney Port who are D-listers on The Hills can still take time out of their busy schedule of doing nothing to relax by a pool in Miami. I wonder if she considers herself an actress like how some people consider themselves football players after a game of flag football. I mean, yea, they technically are, but at the same time, they’re complete idiots.

Web finds

The Blemish — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:04:38 +0000

‘Epidemic’ of Rx drug abuse in Hollywood. Is this news? [Popeater]
Irony: Corey Haim turned down Celebrity Rehab. [The Superficial]
Alexander Skarsgard is his own charismatic blond star. [PopSugar]
Cheryl Cole and her hot tattoo. [Drunken Stepfather]
Tina Fey’s new movie is meh. [Lainey]
Selita Ebanks drops some cleavage. [Hollywood Tuna]
Kirsten Stewart has improved her public speaking. [OK!]

But what does the other Corey have to say?

The Blemish — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 23:05:41 +0000

Since you were dying to know, here’s Corey Feldman on Corey Haim’s death.

I was awakened at 8:30 this morning by my brother and sister knocking on my bedroom door. They informed me of the loss of my brother Corey Haim. My eyes weren’t even open all the way when the tears started streaming down my face. I am so sorry for Corey, his mother Judy, his family, my family, all of our fans, and of course my son who I will have to find a way to explain this to when he gets home from school. This is a tragic loss of a wonderful,beautiful,tormented soul, who will always be my brother,family, and best friend. We must all take this as a lesson in how we treat the people we share this world with while they are still here to make a difference. Please respect our families as we struggle and grieve through this difficult time. I hope the art Corey has left behind will be remembered as the passion of that for which he truly lived. ~ Corey

I wonder if Corey Feldman woke up at 1 AM terrified as if sensing something was wrong. Sort of like how you hear twins do when their other half dies. Because that would be kind of creepy. Having Corey find out I watch him sleep at 1 AM in the morning.

The Blemish

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