New Perspective

Stupid Thoughts that Surface because You're Trying to do Everything But Your Homework

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 13:10:00 +0000

Would you rather be heartbroken or the heart-breaker?

Maybe I'm just being completely idiotic as usual, but I would rather be heartbroken than be responsible for someone else being heartbroken.

I'm also at this point whereby I wouldn't want to be anything more than friends with the guy I like in the (impossible) event that he feels the same way too.

It's weird how I have a whole lot to say about this that just wouldn't translate onto paper.

Peace out.

Just One

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 15:40:00 +0000

My thoughts have been pretty uncanny as of late, and I do apologize if I happen to come across as offensive.

But I couldn't help but wonder:

What if there was only one God in the world who decided to appear in different manifestations to suit our needs?

If in Christianity, the Father, Son and Holy Ghost are one and the same; if in Islam, Allah has 99 names to describe him; if in Hinduism, there are various Gods and Goddesses for specific purposes; if in Buddhism, there was only one Buddha; if in Taoism there are different Gods and Goddesses as well, why can't it be possible that they all happen to be one?

Free time is an invitation to over-think.

I should be studying Calculus and Chemistry, but my brain has other plans. =='

If you were to do cross references of the various religions in the world, you'd find similarities. No religion will tell you to get drunk, have unsafe sex or murder someone. So what happens if God appeared in different forms at different time and places in order to guide a particular community in accordance to what He thinks will help spread the message of goodness to the people?

It also begs the question: what about atheists?

Ultimately, I think it's who you are as a person that defines you rather than your religion.

You can pray more than the average person does, but without sincerity and true kindness, where does that leave you compared to an atheist with morals?

This is getting a bit overwhelming. I shall stop now.

Good night world.

Unanswered

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 13:54:00 +0000

You said not to believe anything anyone tells me, not even if you said it, unless it accords with my own common sense.

But what if my belief tends to the notion in which you do not buttress?

What am I to do about that?

I've been trying to seek answers to the questions I have never bothered to ask until now, when it appears that I can no longer evade them. It's been confusing the hell out of me, because there is no straight answer to each query. It requires deep exploration, and I'm not sure if I am ready to handle the truth.

Hmm.

I should really talk to someone about this. o.0

Cousins

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 12:09:00 +0000

I have no shame in admitting that I am closer to my maternal cousins than paternal ones.

My mom's side of the family is much smaller than my dad's side, but we get along just great. As a matter of fact, the very thing I look forward to every Chinese New Year is the reunion lunch at my aunt's.

With me in Shah Alam, one cousin previously in Petaling Jaya and the other in Sungai Petani, gatherings were definitely fewer than when we were all still in Penang. Back then, my aunt would throw random barbecues just so we could meet up.

Today's lunch was definitely awesome. :)

I feel so much fatter already!

The Place Where Love and Feeling Good Don't Ever Cost a Thing

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 15:21:00 +0000

Don't you wish you like the people who feel the same about you rather than liking the people who don't give a shit about you and like someone else instead?

003

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 15:52:00 +0000

Joy

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 08:21:00 +0000

I have never felt so complete.

Thank you Simple Plan.

Thank you for making my dreams come true.

Last night was one heck of a show. The energy was boundless, and the unity of everyone present was mesmerizing. I have been waiting for last night for so long that everything still feels surreal. Triumphing over the elation and excitement is a feeling of bewilderment. I can't help but ask myself: Did I really see Simple Plan live last night? Or was it just a dream?

Was it real? Was I really there looking at Chuck, David, Jeff, Pierre and Seb?

On nights like the one before, I simply can't help but believe in miracles.

You are and will always be my number one band.

Thank you so much for everything. :)

Resolutions

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 16:40:00 +0000

It was rather wise not to bother too much with resolutions.

My attention span rivals that of a goldfish, and my resolutions hit ground level faster than I can spell the word.

But good luck to Ba who has about twenty. ;)

Tomorrow

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 16:36:00 +0000

Saturday

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 23:37:00 +0000

I have a little desk calendar marking down to Saturday. With each passing day, I get excited as I cross off another day. Saturday is SO SO NEAR! Six - almost SEVEN - years of wait is coming to an end!

See you soon, Chandini and Suha. :)

Between X and O

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 15:26:00 +0000

I remember being asked: Hugs or kisses?

I didn't have an answer back then, but at the moment, I am inclined to go with hugs.

During my short stint in France whereby I had to kiss everyone I met regardless of whether they were old, young, fat, thin, tall, short, I was rather peeved when I exchanged kisses with someone with bad breath. It was just ... whoa.

But hugs are awesome.

Most of the people I know aren't accustomed to hugs, which is sad, because if they were, I'd be hugging them every other day. My most frequently hugged people lately are Hani and Noresh. Lol.

Sigh

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 15:34:00 +0000

You are so, so perfect, at least to me.

I'll be devastated when that rejection letter comes in the mailbox.

But a tiny part of me hopes for a miracle.

Brush

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 15:18:00 +0000

I haven't touched a paintbrush in years.

So when Matthew suggested plaster painting, I was pretty hesitant about going along with it. I did religiously get C's for my Art subject back in secondary school, if you must know.

The end product wasn't so bad I guess. Maybe it's because I didn't have to paint the whole thing on my own. I suppose Wen Hui will post a picture of it real soon. In the meantime, the sculpture (is that what you call it?) is sitting on my desk in Akasia. We're gonna take turns keeping it.

Later on we met up with Noresh and Daryl before heading for dinner.

In short, it was a pretty awesome Saturday.

002

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 15:10:00 +0000

Merci

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 20:14:00 +0000

Thank you for being there.

001

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:58:00 +0000

A Circle, A Center and Twelve Markings

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 14:43:00 +0000

2012 makes me feel old.

A good friend of mine once said, "You seem to have aged after applications."

In retrospect, I am inclined to believe that I can't even begin to put together the minuscule puzzle pieces that make me feel as though 2011 was a few light years away despite the truth that it has only been four days.

The one thing the past year has taught me would be to appreciate the people around you, especially those who care about you.

Time has its idiosyncratic manner of showing you who will actually stay and who is just there for the moment. Now that I'm miles away from home and everyone I used to see on a daily basis, it became apparent to me who were the ones I would love nothing more than to keep with me by my side. I may want to make new friends, but I do not want to be on a constant search for true friends. To the ones I have back home (and one who very far away from me at the moment), thank you.

On the flip side, I have come to form new bonds with very wonderful people who are just like family. :) Then again, there is also the discovery that you simply cannot get along with several people, but that's not my aim in life to begin with.

I still remember that one time when Hani and I were happily chatting in McDonald's, blissfully oblivious to how our phones were on silent mode. I had 17 missed calls from several friends who scared themselves into thinking that I was missing/kidnapped/in trouble. Upon realization of the duress I put them through, I couldn't see the humor behind the situation. But thank you. I truly appreciate that.

At the end of the day, I think I'm just glad to have met people who are beyond amazing.

So stay. :)

Le Soleil

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 13:14:00 +0000

Back at INTEC. There's one thing about this place I can never like: THE HEAT.

You can't help but feel that there's a hole in the ozone right where this place is. Even air-conditioning doesn't do much.

Thank you Hani for walking with me back and forth and back and forth today. :D

I think I've grown ten shades darker from all the walking.

._.

January

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:21:00 +0000

I thought of some resolutions. But I have yet to put them down on paper.

Am hoping they make it past January.

Oh, Carmen.

Contradiction

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:16:00 +0000

The more I think about it, the more it hurts.

But hey, I did tell myself that it's a new year, and that I'm gonna keep myself happy.

:)

Situations

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 05:15:00 +0000

I'm almost always around when someone says:

"They're together? What does she see in him?"

"What does he see in her?"

I guess the answer is this:

People ask me what I see in you and that's perfectly fine with me because I wouldn't want them to.

Bon Nouvel An

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 16:00:00 +0000

Teehee

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 16:03:00 +0000

If you think I'm rubbing it in your face, then I'm really sorry.

Butbutbut guess what?!

SUBMITTED. PAID. DONE. BROKE.

Columbia U was the last school I submitted. Right after that, I checked to make sure I did submit every fucking thing, then I started dancing around the living room.

Scratch that.

I didn't dance.

I went ... hysterical.

In between dancing and going hysterical.

Think about it. I'm on semester break (which is ending!) but I devoted the entire break to writing essays and getting depressed.

Now that it's done, I'm so elated I don't even want to think about how it might just rain rejection letters next year.

To those of you still in the midst of applications, all the very best! :)

I can finally sleep (in peace). Le blissful sigh.

People

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 06:00:00 +0000

It takes time to get to know people.

The sad truth lies with the inevitable reality of how the people with whom you initially thought you had chemistry turn out otherwise.

When you suddenly discover after getting to know them better that you two have clashing personalities, you realize that distance is the only thing that will refrain you from losing your head with them.

It is not my intention to be mean, but I know better how quick-tempered I am, and the best way for me to be able to bite my tongue would be to minimize contact with you. Unfortunately, I can't always have things my way. I can, however, keep my fingers crossed that our time together will be shorter than it has to be. I'm sorry to say this, but I can't picture myself missing you.

I know I have my faults, and I'm sorry to say this, but yours irk me.

How is it possibly sweet that you treat someone with what I observe to be an infinitesimal ounce of respect? I reckon you are accustomed to having things go your way. Well, so was I, until I saw the monstrosity the privilege made me.

Nevertheless, my obduracy remains; I simply won't tolerate someone who refuses to tolerate others even at least once. If others are going to give in, then that is their disposition. I'm the bitch who fights back.

You can go screw yourself if you think everyone worships the very ground upon which you amble.

Irony

noreply@blogger.com (thecarmenata) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 04:59:00 +0000

The only thing you're avoiding ends up being shoved in your face. You know what I call this? Lyfe, yo.