Angela Merkel

When pointing out the prominent and highly respected women in our government, I have to applaud Hilary Clinton. Love her or hate her, you have to admire her guts, fortitude, and just plain DARE-ing!  Although she leads the most “packed-full” life, with grave issues her constant companion, I love that she can state firmly and proudly, “My daughter is getting married, and it is the most important thing in my life right now.”

Of course, there is Michelle Obama.  Whether you agree with her husband’s ability and/or performance is neither here nor there. This woman is impressive, in her healthful lifestyle and her tackling of childhood obesity.

And I have to take my hat off to Angela Merkel. Sometimes nicknamed “Iron Lady,” a compliment if you appreciate the UK’s Margaret Thatcher, Merkel has been at the top of the Forbes Magazine list of “The World’s 100 Most Powerful Women” for the last five consecutive years.

Let’s just stop talking about their clothes! These DARE-ing over-40 women are influential, powerful, and honorable women leaders, not models or celebrities. Who cares what they are wearing?

Maria Bartiromo

Often we hear that if an accomplished woman over 40 is not the “top in her field” or “one in a million” or (the most overused cliché) “unique” then she’s not worth noting or celebrating.  We have a different point of VIEW.   Women over 40 distinguish themselves in fields that are on VIEW every day, and many of them are not traveling around with posses of assistants, hairdressers and wardrobe stylists.  Even if they are, they’re so credible and accomplished at their jobs, that we don’t even notice the battalion of help they get.

Over the next month we’re saluting DARE-ING women over 40 on VIEW in journalism, critical government positions, valuable nonprofits and the corporate world.

On TV, here are the women over 40 whose points of VIEW we admire.

While luminaries such as Diane Sawyer, Meredith Viera and Katie Couric get a lot of deserved positive news coverage even when they’re not actually on the air doing their jobs, I DARE say it’s time to notice other equally accomplished women over 40 who write, produce and report the news in these three areas:  politics; environmentalism; and finance.

NBC’s Chief Foreign Affairs Correspondent, Andrea Mitchell, who is also an MSNBC anchor of her own news show, really impresses me.  This elegant woman presents a refreshing and calm VIEW of current events, totally lacking in ballast and hyperbole, let alone the rudeness of some of her male counterparts.  Mitchell focuses on the issues, not on herself, or her PR.  Considering that she’s married to the former Chairman of the Federal Reserve, Alan Greenspan, and that United States Senators make time to talk to her in the middle of their day, it’s even more astonishing that she keeps the focus on the news, and not on the glitz, glamour and glory of being on television.

Anne Thompson, Chief Environmental Correspondent for NBC’S Nightly News, is another example of a reporter whose #1 job is to do her job well.   Poised, elegant, and calm, like Mitchell, when Anne Thompson is updating you about the Gulf oil spill, it’s like your big sister letting you down gently, without being patronizing or condescending.  Her handling of the Gulf issue has been empathetic without being maudlin, and has remained at all times objective, matter-of-fact and gracious.

Another television journalist we love is Maria Bartiromo, anchor of CNBC’s “Closing Bell with Maria Bartiromo” and “The Wall Street Journal Report with Maria Bartiromo.” Bartiromo had to endure a few years of gossip and the moniker of “Money Honey” (which I even hate to bring up) a few years back, but there’s no one at CNBC who can command the attention, respect and deference that Wall Street titans give to Bartiromo.  Smart CEOs know that they have to do Bartiromo’s show, and she doesn’t shy away from the tough questions.   In December 2009, Bartiromo was featured in the Financial Times as one of the “50 Who Shaped the Decade.”   Take some time to VIEW Bartiromo when she’s doing “The Closing Bell” and you’ll see how her less-seasoned colleagues (male and female) defer to and take their cues from her.  God forbid they DARE to do otherwise, because I would flip the channel in a heartbeat.

Take time out of your own day to VIEW accomplished women in your own life who are also understated, competent and confident.  VIEW such accomplished women as the role models our daughters should emulate.    Not every accomplished woman over 40 (or any age!) has to constantly shout (implicitly or explicitly), “Look at me!  Look at me!” They DARE to let their accomplishments do the talking.

In previous blogs I have talked about going back to school (it was truly one of the best things I ever did, to go back and get my MBA from NYU!) With the continuing weakened economy, and global demand for higher levels of skills and education, adults are re-enrolling in college campuses across the nation and online. The stats are convincing:[1] studies are showing that 75% of future jobs will most likely need some type of certification or licensure, and those professions that demand a BS or BA will grow 50% faster than the national average. So a college degree looks more and more a necessity and a good investment.

You think, go back to school- not at my age! But by going back, you’d be one of huge numbers: recent statistics from the U.S. Department of Education[2] are revealing that adult students are now the fastest growing demographic in the educational arena, with those numbers increasing steadily.

Baby Boomers know they will be living longer, and demand more from their lives. They want fulfillment, not just a job. More DARE-ing women aged 55 to 79 are deciding what they want to do in their next years. A report from The American Council on Education, entitled, Framing New Terrain: Older Adults & Higher Education, shows more that with older adults returning to college in record numbers, they are DARE-ing to pursue new career ideas, found new businesses, and create their lifelong dreams.

DARE MUSCLE: go back to school with your learning MUSCLE!

Have a look at the following stats. When asked what outcomes they achieved from coaching, clients most often say:[i]

• A higher level of self-awareness: 67.6%
• Smarter goal-setting: 62.4%
• A more balanced life: 60.5%
• Lower stress levels: 57.1%
• Self-discovery: 52.9%
• More self-confidence: 52.4%
• Improvement in quality of life: 43.3%
• Enhanced communication skills: 39.5%
• Project completion: 35.7%
• Health or fitness improvement: 33.8%
• Better relationships with boss or co-workers: 33.3%
• Better family relationships: 33.3%
• Increased energy: 31.9%
• More fun: 31.9%
• More income: 25.7%
• Stopped a bad habit: 25.7%
• Change in career: 24.3%
• More free time: 22.9%
• Increased profitability of business: 17.1%
• Started new business: 12.9%
• Empowered employees: 11.0%

Consider giving it a try. If you are thinking of personal or career coaching, remember to seek out professionals who have graduate degrees in respected disciplines, such as:  business (MBA); counseling (M.S. Psychology or Masters in Social Work and related areas); educational psychology (M. Ed. Psych.) or similar bona fide expertise taught at respected accredited universities (online or on campus).  For more information on these professionals, and other certified counselors or business consultants, contact Liz DiMarco Weinmann, MBA, Founder and CEO of The DARE-Force, liz@thedareforce.com

So, DARE MUSCLE with a business or life coach!

A Global Coaching Survey conducted by the International Coaching Federation found that the coaching industry is on a rapid rise, with 12,300 business coaches in the USA alone.

“On-boarding” – which is a form of business coaching that used to be reserved for executives, is now becoming available to employees at every level. Companies that are hiring are eager to accelerate the learning curve of new hires, so on-boarding has replaced what used to be called “orientation.” Books on the topic abound:  From titles like “The First 90 Days” by Michael Watkins, to “The New Leader’s 100-Day Action Plan” by George Bradt, both of which are very helpful and written in a non-jargon style.

Hay House Publishing, the most successful self-help publishing company in the world, recently announced that it has seen an unprecedented increase in self-help manuscripts. Because Hay selects only 100 books to publish from the thousands of unsolicited self-help manuscripts it receives each year, Hay just launched an alliance with a self-publishing book firm.  More help is on the way, literally!

To a large extent, women over 40 are driving this trend, seeing that taking charge through self-help books or employing personal development services empowers them; they take the DARE to become healthier, smarter, more highly skilled, more confident, and more energetic.  Americans are still worried about the economy, and more women over 40 are working full-time longer than they ever thought they would.  Many of them are the sole breadwinners in their families, meaning they have myriad responsibilities that include financing their children’s college education, taking care of elderly parents, and dealing with their own health concerns.  While few people can afford to get sick at all, let alone take what used to be called a “mental health” day, most women over 40 can’t even make time for a mental health hour, even once a week.

In a weakened economy, it may be even more important to DARE develop new self-improvement MUSCLES, to amp up your health regimen with more fruits, whole grains and vegetables, and commit to some form of exercise, even if it’s just walking more.  Most important, make time to rest your MUSCLES - sleep deprivation helps no one, especially not yourself!

But what does “personal development” mean to someone who is working 70+ hours a week, inside and outside the home, barely has time to shop for healthful food, and is battling major stressors in her life, including juggling her children’s education bills with taking care of elderly parents?

Recently, I heard from a woman who said that she is suffering from cancer, works because she needs to, and that not all role models for DARE-ING women should be celebrities.  At The DARE-Force, we reference celebrities because they’re some of the best-known and omni-present examples of what it’s possible for women over 40 to achieve and keep achieving.

However, we also reference women over 40 who arguably are contributing far more to society than any Hollywood actress or TV star could:  they’re running Fortune 500 corporations or major national nonprofits.  They’re running community action campaigns to improve our children’s education, or to increase safety in our neighborhoods.  Many women over 40 are accomplishing these feats while also fighting chronic illnesses, systemic disabilities, and life-threatening diseases.

These women are using their MUSCLE in a completely different way than celebrities or Fortune 500 powerhouse CEOs, or even the directors of major nonprofits.  Women who are juggling multiple stressors or illness, such as the woman who wrote to me, are the ones for whom we all need a different kind of MUSCLE.  For those women, we should all exercise the most important MUSCLE of all:  our HEARTS.

It takes a lot of MUSCLE during a down economy for even the healthiest women to juggle multiple responsibilities.   If there’s a woman in your life who’s juggling more than the strongest MUSCLES could handle, flex a different kind of MUSCLE just for her.  Reach out to her with a kind but not patronizing offer of help, or just an acknowledgment that she matters.  You would be strengthening your most important MUSCLE of all.

Look for pleasurable ways to take a break – be a “pleasure activist” (not the same as a hedonist!) Actually, the term “pleasure activist” is from Fred Plotkin, a master at a lot of intellectual strengths.  A writer, speaker, seeker, and a fascinating (and fascinated) individual, he is best known for his musical analytical talents, and these two books, Opera 101 and Classical Music 101.

Fred Plotkin urges us, when using the senses, “to not analyze what is being perceived while we are doing the perceiving.”  Women over 40, and indeed most people, tend to crash through their lives – constantly rushing, and not hearing the sounds around them, eating but not tasting, smelling but not really savoring, seeing but not perceiving.

So, here is the DARE. Today, try to take pleasure in something that crosses your path – perhaps that flute player in the subway. Stop for a minute and listen to the exquisite note he lets ring. Or perhaps that bit of dark chocolate from Switzerland that you popped in your mouth as you ran for the taxi. Can you sit in the cab and let the velvety taste fill every sense? Close your eyes and enjoy that sweet moment with all of your awareness. That is pleasure activism, and let me tell you, it feels very good! Use your imagination. When you slide into the swimming pool this weekend, feel, really feel, the water over your skin, the sense of weightlessness, the cool relief after the heat of our summer sun.

Let that complete change of brain activity recharge you.

DARE exercise a different kind of muscle!

There are many connotations to those two words, DARE muscle: body building, using brute force, or DARE-ING to eye down a bully. But I have been thinking about DARE muscle in a different way. To me it is about discovering, developing, and expanding the body and the “mind-as-muscle.”

This can be done in fun ways, in unusual ways, perhaps by utilizing Dr. Howard Gardner’s  Multiple Intelligences Theory.[i] Dr. Gardner, professor of education at Harvard University, developed and published his theory in 1983. He stated that the usual idea of intelligence, based on the testing of I.Q., has limitations. He suggested that there are different forms of intelligence to explain the broad range of human potential.

• Linguistic intelligence (smart with words)
• Logical-mathematical intelligence (ability with numbers)
• Spatial intelligence (shapes and pictures)
• Bodily-Kinesthetic intelligence (physical body)
• Musical intelligence (musical ability)
• Interpersonal intelligence (people skills)
• Intrapersonal intelligence (ability to understand oneself)
• Naturalist intelligence (sensitivity to the things of nature)
• Existential (Sensitivity/capacity to tackle deep questions about human existence)

This is very interesting stuff. Check out: http://www.thomasarmstrong.com/multiple_intelligences.php

But the nutshell is this: pick one of these intelligence areas and stretch yourself. Learning the piano is an expanding experience, and is refreshing if it is out of your normal focus area. For example, if you work in a field where your intelligence focus is interpersonal, such as Human Resources, musical intelligence will be a complete change! As our English friends across the water like to say, “A change is as good as a rest.”

If you, as an over-40 woman, crank your brain for most of the year in heavy intellectual work, then the beach-reads (trashy novels and such) are a good way to give the brain a rest. Stretch your awareness to other art-forms (go to different museums, etc.), vary your CD listening (rock vs. opera, or the other way around), or take up belly dancing!

The long hot summer, now underway, can be a chance to let up on the heavy muscle stuff, and a time to learn tennis, join a volleyball game, or learn a new language – something out of your normal world! And have fun as you DARE work a different muscle!

“This is freedom. It is a stage of life that is free of many encumbrances and full of wonderful possibilities. We are still young enough to live life to its fullest and enjoy all the good things nature has provided us. During this period a lot of women experience a renewed zest for life, rejuvenated sexual desire, and look for exhilarating new adventures or new beginnings. It is like starting life all over with a better set of rules.”

Yes! She says it so well.  That’s because BLOOM, our theme for June, really is all about the freedom to EXPRESS your experience in the second half of your life.

In my new book, Get DARE From Here™, due out in a few weeks, I encourage women over 40 to be who you are, and furthermore, to not be afraid to show people who you are. I suggest ways to brand and exhibit yourself to the best advantage in both your career and your community.  EMBRACE yourself! Take care and “love” who you’ve become! Then you can focus on EXCHANGE, where you can give back- donate, mentor, teach, etc.

And  I ask you,  who better to do that- to start BLOOM-ing, than a mature woman in her prime?

Super-BLOOMING Woman: Paula Deen

Late BLOOMERS are all the rage. How about the over-40 women you see on the screen: Meryl Streep, Diane Keaton, Helen Mirren, Sharon Stone─these empowered, confident women are great models of success, tenacity, and re-invention. Modeling agencies report that there is more demand for beautiful women over 40, and over 50, to help marketers sell to us boomers.  Everyone from cosmetics companies to car makers is courting us.  Some of the most popular women on TV are over 50, and certainly many of them are late BLOOMERS.

One of the most popular is Paula Deen. This well-known Southern cook suffered so badly from agoraphobia in her 20s that she wouldn’t even leave her house.  Today, no one would believe that about this brassy, loud, fun and totally BLOOMING broad!  She’s written 5 books, owns a restaurant in Savannah, has her own line of signature pies at Wal-Mart (but, of course, “Y’ALL!”), and hosts several shows on the Food Network. Her brazen, butter-everywhere, innuendo-infused (“Now, beat your meat, Y’ALL!”) commentary may not be for everyone, but her fans adore her. As a businesswoman who recognizes a shrewd mogul when I see one, I love that she has parlayed that platinum-poufed, gutsy-guffawing persona all the way to a big bruiser bank.  More power to her!  She  demonstrates that it takes determination, sweat, and some serious tilling of the soil for us to enjoy new BLOOMS (not to mention BLOOMING profits) well into our 40s, 50s and beyond.

So, to paraphrase Paula Deen, what about “Y’ALL”???? What’s in BLOOM for you this month?