The DL

Good to See the Penguins Are Still Alive

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 08:09:00 +0000

Which, unfortunately, is more than I can say for my pattern of posting to this blog. It's not that I haven't had anything interesting to write about--it's just that I've been negligent. I was even called out on my negligence over Thanksgiving (thanks, Elliot), and still I failed to post anything (sorry, Elliot).

Also, for those of you who are disappointed that I didn't write my annual thrashing of that consumer-bastardized disaster known as Valentine's day, well, I spent it staffing JV practice.

Of course, now that I am sitting down to write, it's midnight, and I run the risk of falling asleep mid-post. Since I'm coaching full time (and dealing with pitchers, no less...pitchers!), I'm usually sitting at the computer at this time updating charts or searching for a quote of the day for the next day's practice. Alas, here I am...fresh out of ideas. So, here's a haiku.

Much to be written
But lacking motivation
So bedtime instead

It's hell getting old...now get off my lawn. Goodnight.

Need a Blog? The Answer is Penguins!

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 01:56:00 +0000

Like so

Live Video streaming by Ustream

Baseball People Everywhere Owe J.P. Arencibia

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 18:18:00 +0000

As baseball fans everywhere rejoice that the absolute joke that is the NBA can be pushed to the back burner now that everyone has reported for the spring, we can turn our attention to our other passion that is tangential to the field--hating on the mind-numbing commentary that comes from ESPN. If you've ever muted your TV the minute you saw Tim Kurkjian on it (and who hasn't?!), then J.P. Arencibia is your hero. Aside from being a big league catcher and Twitter superstar which already make him a certified badass, he absolutely blew Kurkjian up on national TV.

Take a look:

Bravo, J.P. Bravo. And as I stated on Facebook and Twitter, if he has, in fact, ruined Kurkjian's TV career, Arencibia should go into Cooperstown immediately.

Song of the Day - "Damn it Feels Good to be a Gangsta"

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 00:40:00 +0000

Plain and simple, this song is forever associated with the scene in Office Space when they're beating the hell out of the printer. PC Load Letter...bitches.

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
A real gangsta-ass nigga plays his cards right
A real gangsta-ass nigga never runs his fuckin mouth
'cause real gangsta-ass niggas don't start fights
And niggas always gotta high cap
Showin' all his boys how he shot em
But real gangsta-ass niggas don't flex nuts
'cause real gangsta-ass niggas know they got em
And everythings cool in the mind of a gangsta
'cause gangsta-ass niggas think deep
Up three-sixty-five a year 24/7
'cause real gangsta ass niggas don't sleep

And all I gotta say to you
Wannabe, gonnabe, cocksuckin', pussy-eatin' prankstas
'cause when the fry dies down what the fuck you gonna do
Damn it feels good to be a gangsta

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
Feedin' the poor and hepin out wit they bills
Although I was born in jamaica
Now I'm in the us makin' deals
Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
I mean one that you don't really know
Ridin' around town in a drop-top benz
Hittin' switches in my black six-fo'
Now gangsta-ass niggas come in all shapes and colors
Some got killed in the past
But this gangtsa here is a smart one
Started living for the lord and I'll last

Now all I gotta say to you
Wannabe, gonnabe, pussy-eatin' cocksuckin' prankstas
When the shit jumps off what the fuck you gonna do
Damn it feels good to be a gangsta

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
A real gangta-ass nigga knows the play
Real gangsta-ass niggas get the flyest of the bitches
Ask that gangsta-ass nigga little jake
Now bitches look at gangsta-ass niggas like a stop sign
And play the role of little miss sweet
But catch the bitch all alone get the digit take her out
And then dump-hittin' the ass with the meat
'cause gangsta-ass niggas be the gang playas
And everythings quiet in the clique
A gangsta-ass nigga pulls the trigger
And his partners in the posse ain't tellin' off shit
Real gangsta-ass niggas don't talk much
All ya hear is the black from the gun blast
And real gangsta-ass niggas don't run for shit
'cause real gangsta-ass niggas can't run fast
Now when you in the free world talkin' shit do the shit
Hit the pen and let the mothafuckas shank ya
But niggas like myself kick back and peep game
'cause damn it feels good to be a gangsta

And now, a word from the president!
Damn it feels good to be a gangsta
Gettin voted into the white house
Everything lookin good to the people of the world
But the mafia family is my boss
So every now and then I owe a favor gettin' down
Like lettin' a big drug shipment through
And send 'em to the poor community
So we can bust you know who
So voters of the world keep supportin' me
And I promise to take you very far
Other leaders better not upset me
Or I'll send a million troops to die at war
To all you republicans, that helped me win
I sincerely like to thank you
'cause now I got the world swingin' from my nuts
And damn it feels good to be a gangsta

Annual Valentine's Day Rant

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 06:50:00 +0000

I hate Valentine's Day. I think it's stupid, pointless and outright exploitative. And it highlights a fundamental flaw of human nature--expectations. I forget where I heard/read this, but "Expectations are resentments under construction." Oh my Lord is this ever true on this day. Valentine's Day sucks.

If you're single, the issue is self-explanatory. But guess what? Even if you're with/seeing someone, it still sucks. God help the poor suckers who date high maintenance girls who expect (there's that word again) to be treated like princesses because it's February 14. And if you just started seeing someone? Good luck deciphering context and body language cues to figure out "where you are" and therefore "what's appropriate." It doesn't matter what you do. You will be wrong.

Any relationship (or lack of a relationship) has numerous outside influences on it. Some can be controlled, and others can't. The fact that there is one day a year that these outside influences are all packaged (by flower/chocolate/greeting card companies) as something that can and should be controlled on anyone's relationship situation is ludicrous. Yet, that's really what's happened. So not only are expectations omnipresent, they're at an all-time high and completely unreasonable. February is a time that we're bombarded with images of what love "really" is and what gift is a "true" indication of how much another person cares about or values us. This is really what it's come to.

Ugh.

With all this going on in the background, my ~~favorite~~ ~~only~~ favorite guest blogger gave her undergraduate students the assignment to analyze a TV commercial or print advertisement, note appeal made by the ad and then spoof it. At least someone's trying to use this to get smarter, right? Apparently not, but that's a different tirade for a different day. I don't know about the rest of my readers, but had I been given this assignment in an undergraduate class the week after the Super Bowl, I would have been pumped because it's easy. These guys? Not so much, apparently.

So, children, while you're otherwise occupied, I will do your homework.

The appeal of this commercial is pretty obvious. Her name is Adriana Lima. She wants men to buy flowers and implies that doing so will get them laid by the women in their lives. Simple. Clear. Transactional. According to this commercial, that's what Valentine's Day is supposed to be. Gents, that's as far as this commercial thinks you're capable of looking.

But guess what, ladies! Before you snicker and start gloating, note the undertone. You will put out if your man mindlessly gives you flowers because a super model on a Super Bowl commercial told us all that's how it works. A simple transaction resulting in sex. That's called prostitution. Adriana Lima may be subtly calling men idiots, but she's even more subtly calling women hookers.

Now if all that doesn't make you want to buy flowers, clearly you don't understand Valentine's Day, and therefore, you don't understand/can't experience love.

As for the second part of the assignment, if I was actually doing this for a grade, I could easily mock the entire video, but this is just a blog. So here's my answer.

Love is something amazing that is shared by people around the world every day--not something that shows up once a year in some empty grandiose gesture. It pisses me off that people allow a few industries to bastardize its meaning for the sake of sales.

I read an article that stated that those celebrating Valentine's Day will spend an average of $126.03. I'm not sure of the methodology of the survey, but as sad as it is, I absolutely believe that number. There are a bunch of other ~~interesting~~ nausea-inducing facts in that article. If you've eaten something that isn't sitting well and want to throw it up, read the whole article.

I'm sure once upon a time Valentine's Day was a valid celebration of real love, but like most things, we've completely screwed the whole deal up now, and now we're left with this.

Again, Ugh.

Song of the Day - "Walk"

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 06:22:00 +0000

I don't want to write, but I'm overdue for a post. This video is an accurate description of how I feel. (But don't tase me, bro.)

A million miles away
Your signal in the distance
To whom it may concern
I think I lost my way
Getting good at starting over
Every time that I return

I'm learning to walk again
I believe I've waited long enough
Where do I begin?
I'm learning to talk again
Can't you see I've waited long enough
Where do I begin?

Do you remember the days
We built these paper mountains
And sat and watched them burn
I think I found my place
Can't you feel it growing stronger
Little conquerors

I'm learning to walk again
I believe I've waited long enough
Where do I begin?
I'm learning to talk again
I believe I've waited long enough
Where do I begin?

Now
For the very first time
Don't you pay no mind
Set me free again
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsty.com/foo-fighters-walk-lyrics.html ]
To keep alive a moment at a time
But still inside a whisper to a riot
To sacrifice but knowing to survive
The first to climb another state of mind
I'm on my knees, I'm praying for a sign
Forever, whenever
I never wanna die
I never wanna die
I never wanna die
I'm on my knees
I never wanna die
I'm dancing on my grave
I'm running through the fire
Forever, whenever
I never wanna die
I never wanna leave
I never say goodbye
Forever, whenever, forever, whenever

I'm learning to walk again
I believe I've waited long enough
Where do I begin?
I'm learning to talk again
Can't you see I've waited long enough
Where do I begin?

I'm learning to walk again
I believe I've waited long enough
I'm learning to talk again
Can't you see I've waited long enough

Attention Bay Area Sports Fans

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 06:36:00 +0000

Shut up. Get a grip. Seriously. That's a killer loss, and I understand that. Any one of us who has ever been a fan of anyone or anything knows that feeling. It sucks. I get it. However, there is no excuse for ever issuing a death threat or wishing someone or someone's family physical harm over the outcome of a sporting event. Seriously, someone (@javpasquel) tweeted "I hope you, youre wife, kids and family die, you deserve it."

No, sir. You deserve to be taken to task and to have every media outlet from here to Siberia post your Twitter handle, so reasonable human beings can tee off on you and make it crystal clear to you what a piece of shit you actually are. (And what do you know? Looks like it happened, since you no longer have an active Twitter account.) Do us all a favor, and don't come back to social media until you grow up. Also, mix in some research because Kyle Williams is single and has no kids. He might even know the difference between "your" and "you're." Though, to be fair, you used neither. You made one up. Combine that with the impressive comma splice and the aforementioned factual inaccuracy, and you have done an unprecedented job of branding yourself an ignorant fuck. Nicely done!

Kyle Williams is the son of White Sox GM Kenny Williams. Kyle's older brother Kenny Jr. played for the Duluth Huskies, and from what I understand, the fact that he couldn't catch up to Northwoods League fastballs didn't deter him from being a total douche. Good to see he's lighting it up in double-A for daddy's organization. I would be lying if I said I wasn't rooting for the Giants and shouting "Kenny Williams' brother" whenever Kyle showed up on screen. Put those two things together, and it was kind of funny at the how his mistakes had such a central role in the outcome of the game. Call it a guilty pleasure.

But clearly my sense of perspective is all wrong! How dare he rob those poor, suffering SF sports fans of a trip to the Super Bowl that they so richly deserve for doing...oh wait...absolutely nothing! I never played at the professional level, and I don't claim to have a particularly good idea of what professional athletes do in the way of training and work, but I was close enough to big time NCAA athletics to realize that athletes aren't circus animals. We're very well aware of the stakes during games, and have always had (and WILL always have) more invested in the outcome. Period. So, "dear" Bay Area sports fans, save the histrionics because, to quote the immortal Bull Durham, "You don't know shit, meat."

Disclaimer: I have facetiously mused in private conversations to a couple of my friends and family members who are 49ers fans that I hoped Jim Harbaugh got hit by a Muni train. It was a joke. Everyone knows a Muni train would simply break down and never hurt anyone anyway. He didn't know what I said. He wouldn't care anyway. And anyone who knows me, knows that I don't wish death on anyone--even someone as douchey as Jim Harbaugh.

Furthermore, as much as I can't stand him, Harbaugh does deserve a ton of credit for his ability to coach and get his team to buy into the true team concept and culture--no small feat with a bunch of guys getting paid millions of dollars. The way Williams' teammates jumped to his defense and picked him up in the face of it all says way more than all the tears currently filling up the bay. But I guess it's easy to keep perspective when you're not the victim.

US Government is Dropping the SOPA

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 02:24:00 +0000

Stories have flown in from all over the Interwebz, and as you would expect with that particular medium, most of it universally positive about how the evil SOPA is no more, and the Internet triumphs over evil corporate agenda-driven Hollywood. That's all well and good, and I do believe that on the aggregate, this is a huge win for numerous reasons. Here are a couple links to stories about it:

Mashable: SOPA Is Dead: Smith Pulls Bill
Techcrunch: SOPA Scorecard: Internet 1, Lobbyists 0

However, (and there is always a however), one of the better articles I read in response to the whole ordeal came from one of the trade pubs I work with for my job, Digiday. Here are a few highlights from the article:

"In reality, the only thing worse than the potential damage that SOPA might inflict is the wave of misplaced earnestness and hypocrisy displayed by much of the tech industry of late."

"In fact, however misguided some of the safeguards built into SOPA and PIPA are, it’s fundamentally about catching bad guys, not destroying free speech. And you should care about that more than you do.

"It’s striking still to this day how naive some in Silicon Valley can be when it comes to the media industry. Many in the business still parrot the libertarian thinking from the Napster era — information yearns to be free, you can’t cut off ideas, the Internet is a utopia, etc.

"Aren’t those days over? Google and Facebook are billion-dollar companies. This is about business, not philosophy or sociology. It’s time for some folks to ditch the bottle and start drinking from a big-kid cup."

I would encourage you to read the whole article to get it all in context, but the point about the Internet being a huge business is spot on. Just because we use it and don't pay a monetary fee to Google doesn't mean that it's not a business that is looking at ways to make money. The difference is that we don't understand how it works, so it's not "real" to us. We understand the transactional nature of paying for a movie. That's our money. We grasp that concept.

Yes, the Internet is a whole new world that plays by different rules, and yes, SOPA and PIPA amounted to Hollywood lobbying Congress to swing at a piñata. But Hollywood wasn't wrong to want to protect its investment any more than Internet companies are wrong wanting to protect theirs.

The fact that the MPAA has the balls to come out and say that SOPA protests are "a gimmick" and that they turn people into "corporate pawns" is patently ridiculous. Do you know of any person or group of people more ridiculous and myopic than movie/entertainment fanboys? Oh wait, maybe ~~tech~~ Apple fanboys....nevermind...

The overriding point is this: whichever side of this debate you fall on, you need to have a good reason for it, and "not having Wikipedia for a day pissed me off" is not any more valid than any argument the MPAA, RIAA or whomever hell else has made. Read articles. Form your own opinion. Educate yourself, so you're not part of the faceless masses who bitched and squawked because you didn't have Wikipedia for a day.

SOPA and PIPA are dead for the time being, but that, in and of itself, is not cause for celebration. As great as the response was across the country and as inspiring as it is that people found a voice, the reality of the situation is that it's like the rest of life--not a black and white issue in which one side is right and one side is wrong. Read up kids. This is just the beginning.

Fighting Back by Going Black

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 08:10:00 +0000

So as anyone who hasn't lived under a rock the last month knows, there are a couple pieces of legislation circulating in Congress that are aimed at targeting ~~pirates~~ rogue sites that infringe on copyright. They are called the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA) and the Protect IP Act (PIPA). Across the Internet publishers and companies protested this in various ways--the most extreme of which were blacking out their sites for the day. It has become so hotly contested between Silicon Valley and Hollywood that it is (rightfully) being framed as an incredibly divisive issue, but I have a different take on the entire situation. This SOPA madness is exactly what this country needs.

Let's start with where we all agree. Pirating is bad. For our own selfish reasons, at times we like pirated copies of things because it's a benefit to us, but we also recognize that this has a negative impact on those who produce and copyright the work that is pirated--namely movies and songs (which is why Hollywood is understandably pissed). Clearly, the fundamental problem with the whole SOPA deal is not the idea behind it. That's fairly sound, and there really isn't much debate around that.

The true root of the issue is that the rogues who are collectively wiping their ass with the whole concept of intellectual property are outside the US. How, then, is Congress going to change any of that by enforcing laws on US companies? Furthermore, how qualified is Congress to even discuss the Internet, let alone regulate it? Anyone who has paid attention to any portion of the Net Neutrality debate knows that the answer is "not a lot."

To their credit, though, some members of Congress seem to be treating this differently. Assuming motivations are pure (which they never are in politics) and not financially-driven (which they always are in politics), it's admirable that they want to do something to protect the copyrighted work of artists in this country. We want to foster that type of creativity and innovation within our own borders. It's part of what makes this country great.

But SOPA isn't just a shot into the dark. It's a firestorm, and the collateral damage could be catastrophic.

Remember the part about fostering innovation and promoting creativity? There's this thing called the Internet that has led to a lot of that, and it's the innocent bystander that gets slaughtered if this legislation passes. How is a search engine supposed to continue to drive innovation when the government is telling it to waste its time picking through its index for something that may link to something from a rogue? How is a blog supposed to purge all images/references to brands because it hasn't gotten the "expressed written consent" of the people in charge of it? Am I getting shut down and arrested for using this image? What about this one?

The Internet age has completely obliterated the old model and restructured way people receive information. That's a good thing. Since when are options for alternative viewpoints bad? Yes, I realize print journalism is "dying," but aggregated media is a huge opportunity, and the pubs that are smart enough to innovate can capitalize on the new distribution--and monetization--models that are emerging.

There are plenty of phenomenal resources that discuss the bits and bytes and the legal arguments for why this whole thing is a complete mess. I won't rehash all that, and if you really want to talk about the viability of endpoint security solutions and packet flow evaluation, I would be happy to discuss (before informing you that you need serious help). But I would encourage all ~~three~~ ~~five~~ seven of my readers to read every last one of them. Here are a couple links to get you started: Ars Technica, Google, and the New York Times. (There's a reason Ars is first. If you read no others, read that one.)

We all have that one "friend" who is just sure that he/she is always right and will argue and argue until everyone else gives up, which of course will only continue to feed that person's self delusion that he/she was, in fact, right. Everyone silently hates that guy/girl and just brushes the whole deal off, knowing that nothing will really change and, for the most part, arguing is futile. That's usually how Congress works. But this SOPA thing is a whole different animal, and the results have been astounding.

Creative: To further drive its point, Google locked this image. Had to take a screenshot of a screenshot to get this image.

Some members of Congress are realizing they're way out over their skis and are backing off their stances, accordingly. The most vicious competitors in Silicon Valley and beyond are on the same side of an issue, are pissed and rallying supporters to let the government know about it. Household brand names all went dark for a day purely to protest. We got fun things like this. And this. And, of course, this.

Some of it was done in silly ways, but the fact of the matter is that it's all serious. The reaction from a generally complacent demographic in a generally complacent nation has been strong, unified and heard at the highest level. To me, that's the most impressive thing of all. I love this SOPA deal.

UPDATE: Looks like I'm not the only person who feels this way. PC World does too. Take a look.

Random Stuff

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 01:31:00 +0000

Knowing full well that it's been too long since I posted and needing inspiration, I sought the advice of a friend, who said she had no inspiration for me...and then proceeded to give me inspiration. "There's nothing going on...nothing to read about other than Golden Globes coverage. Also Madonna looks terrible." Win. Thanks, Nicole!

Let's start with Golden Globes coverage. I don't even know what the Golden Globes actually are. Seriously. I grew up in LA, and I have no clue. As far as I'm concerned it's just another of the anonymous Hollywood awards shows, which are generally full of the toolish douchebaggery that viewers fawn over. I know what the Emmy's and the Oscar's are, and I know what the Grammy's are. (I know what the CMA's are because their name is self-explanatory. Other awards shows should look into this naming convention.) Here are two headlines from the LA Times that jumped out at me.

"Golden Globes Irrelevant? Maybe. But not the speeches"

"Censors have no problem with penis jokes"

Seriously. This is what the ~~only~~ largest newspaper in this massive media market has to say about this awards show. Good to know that I'm on par with the rest of the population, and I'm not missing anything relevant. Frightening to know that, as a former Crespi student, I am qualified to be a censor for said awards show that I know ~~dick~~ nothing about. Print news may be dying, but I wish there was a way to see the pass along rate because I can pretty much guarantee people ate those stories up.

(Nicole is now telling me how Meryl Streep said "shit" because she forgot her glasses and couldn't read her speech. Clearly, that is frowned upon, but you can decide if it's frowned upon because you're not supposed to say that or because any moment of authenticity is verboten in the context of an entertainment event.)

So what I'm surmising is that this is one of the many screen-focused awards shows. But then there is this Madonna thing that I was informed about. And now we're back to being confused.

However, my confusion surrounding the awards show pales in comparison to my confusion about the Super Bowl halftime show. (I'm not making money off this blog. Fewer than 10 people will read it. It is not the "Big Game." It is the Super Bowl.) Who in their right mind thought that Madonna would be a good idea for that? Seriously, after Justin Timberlake-Janet Jackson Nipplegate, the whole concept of the halftime show has floundered and just been a directionless mess (kind of like my blog but MUCH more expensive and MUCH more visible).

Though I'm not a Springsteen guy, he makes sense. Prince didn't really make all that much sense to me, but I thought it was good. But then there are the Stones (who are awesome but what the hell are we doing putting a British band on stage at the freakin' Super Bowl?) and the Black Eyed Peas and whoever the hell else has been on there. It's all over the map and seems to be more miss than hit. Yes, Madonna is a legend. I get that. But does anyone really want to hear "Like a Virgin" or "Vogue" at halftime of the Super Bowl? If you do, I refuse to watch the game with you.

I may refuse to watch the game altogether if it's going to be ~~LSU and Alabama Part 3~~ the 49ers and the Ravens. Unless Ray Lewis tackles Jim Harbaugh. That I would watch. But since that's unlikely, please, for the love of ~~God~~ ~~offense~~ something watchable, we need a Giants-Patriots rematch.

So there you go. Huge thanks to Nicole (whose bosses are apparently racist and whose former coworkers think I'm racist), who had to work today and hit me on gchat when I logged in to check mail. Goes to show...you never know who you might inspire (or "inspire").

National "Championship" Game Tomorrow Night

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 07:34:00 +0000

Who's pumped up and ready to watch what will, undoubtedly, be an absolute shootout?! Yeah...me neither. And at the end of it, one team will hoist a crystal football and celebrate an NCAA title...except that there is no NCAA title in ~~Division IA~~ the Bowl Subdivision. Just take a look at how many of these were awarded by the NCAA. Yet, at the most critical juncture of the season, it delegates the "championship" of its prized product to multiple third parties. Clearly I'm no expert, but to me, that is the very definition of a lack of institutional control.

New Year, New Geography, New Resolve

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 05:17:00 +0000

Ah, a new year. A time to reflect on the previous year and to look forward to what lies ahead. This time, it's 2012. I need to say this because, it was damn near 2010 the last time I posted anything on this blog, so I need to remind my ~~legions~~ handful of readers that we have, in fact, skipped 2011. Seriously. DL blog years are like anti-dog years. They're not uniform, and they're often comparable to 2x one calendar year...or the time it takes a page to load on Internet Explorer. I hereby resolve to reverse that trend in 2012...keeping in mind that resolutions are always a work in progress.

Speaking of New Year's resolutions, I ran across this great article, which was posted by one of the folks I follow on the intense time suck known as Twitter. I pass along to you 20 New Year's Resolutions For 20-Somethings. I'll leave it to you to read, but it basically is supposed to give you a positive outlook and, right off the top, warn you not to post things to social media platforms unless you absolutely have to share them. Well, I absolutely had to share this article. I, along with 17 thousand other people have shared this on my Facebook page already, but I've shared zero commentary about it. Until now.

Some of these are no-brainers. Some of these are borderline revolutionary. Some are easy. Some are difficult. They're all worthwhile. It's a good blend of reminders and suggestions--all written in a witty, conversational tone that speaks directly to the audience. Great read. And it made me think of my own resolutions.

Clearly, one of them is to get back on the horse with this blogging thing. There are days when I come home from staring at a computer screen at work, and the last thing I want to do is to stare at a computer screen at home and write. This is obviously not one of those days. In evaluating why I fell off the blogging horse to begin with, I came to the conclusion that I had spread myself too thin in a lot of ways, and the personal writing is what I sacrificed. It's a matter of prioritizing differently, and my goal is to update more regularly. Stay tuned. (You'll know in a month if you can change the channel.)

Another thing I have been working on but need to continue to push myself to keep working on is reducing my reaction to negativity. Things happen. Sometimes those things suck. Sometimes they suck a LOT. A lot of the time, we can't do a thing about it. Most of the time, though, they go away and we realize that they weren't all that big of a deal in the first place.

That said, how stupid is it to fight it? We drive ourselves crazy trying to control things that we can't control and lose control of the things we can, thereby driving everyone else around us crazy. To some extent, we are all guilty of this. I firmly believe that it's impossible to completely eliminate this because it's partially human nature. But there's always room for improvement. I resolve to help others and myself trend in that direction.

Speaking of room for improvement, I got my first piece of mail since I've lived here! Yay! I've been here two months. I don't know what the eff the US Postal Service has been doing with my mail, other than returning it to people who put the correct name and address on it. It's an annoyance when it's Christmas cards. (Sorry Grandma, Uncle Greg and Aunt Linda, Dave and Erin and Mr. and Mrs. Caton...don't know what to tell you, but Merry Christmas anyway!)

However, when I set up my utilities for this apartment, I wanted to set things up to manage them online. Save paper, not deal with the lag time of snail mail, etc. I was told that to do so, I would need the account number that would be at the top of my first statement. They obviously have my address and my name right. There is power in my apartment, but for how long? At some point, they're going to get pissed that I haven't paid my bill.

So I spent my evening filling out yet another change of address request online before I was assaulted by ads for magazine subscriptions and coupons for that racist home "improvement" wasteland Lowe's. I'm really glad that the postal service can't figure out my address, but they can strike a number of ad deals and use them to piss off the very people they're supposed to serve! America! No wonder they're going broke. So anyway, I did what any reasonable person would do. I filled out their survey and blistered them. I'm pretty sure no one will ever read that (kind of like my blog). Then I sat down to write this blog and talked about how I'm working toward eliminating negativity. Whoops. I guess this resolution thing really is a work in progress.

I got a car

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 11 Apr 2011 03:40:00 +0000

Here is a picture of it. I really want my license plates to come in the mail, so I can get rid of the stupid dealer ones.

No, it's Not a Late April Fool's Joke

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 04:49:00 +0000

It really is me...I'm blogging...kind of. Just to catch you up on things, my NCAA basketball bracket went down in flames. Kentucky getting to the Final Four probably saved me from finishing in last place at my office. Oh well. Other than that, work is pretty solid.

The Pilots have finally shown some signs of life and are sitting at 6-3 going into the second round of league games that we might actually get to play because it seems to have stopped raining finally. Seriously. It's stupid up here. No way should there be water falling out of the sky for as prolonged a period of time as has been the case here.

Oh yeah. My car got totaled. Here are the pictures:

Yes...that is a fire hydrant laying in the ground, and yes, it is laying on the ground because my motor vehicle struck it.

Weather

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 19 Mar 2011 06:34:00 +0000

In short, it sucks up here. Seriously, if this keeps up, I may be on my way to the Sheen Zone. I went to the grocery store tonight (because, you know...all the cool kids go grocery shopping and blog on their Friday nights), and I got peppered by hailstones on my way back to the car. Forecast calls for rain for the next week straight. I hate this place. And I gave up alcohol for Lent again. Not gonna lie...I might not make it this time.

Now Entering: The Sheen Zone

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 02:18:00 +0000

I want to coin this term so that it applies to any and all people who have just gone so absolutely batshit crazy that there are no words to describe them.

But don't take my word for it. Take Charlie's.

Hey! Remember me?!

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 27 Feb 2011 06:38:00 +0000

It's ok if you don't...I totally understand. Half the time, I don't even remember me at this point, but the quick and dirty of what has been going on in DL land is that work is taking me behind the woodshed, and I'm trying to get out and coach as much as I can, but the shitty nocal weather is not cooperating.

However, since blogging and computer activities are best performed indoors, I have put together a site for the SJND baseball program. The roster pages will get a little more elaborate as I have more content, and once I have someone to take pictures, we will have some of those too.

Join the party. Subscribe to the blog. Follow the Twitter. Go Pilots!

(Also, for those of you who are into the reasons behind everything ever, I changed the color scheme on this blog when Pilots baseball activities started.)

Arizona...the many levels of FAIL

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Wed, 19 Jan 2011 20:11:00 +0000

So other than watching high school girls' basketball, drinking ridiculous amounts and eating horrifically, I got to experience the "great" state of Arizona. Here are the ~~low~~highlights:

Arizona State undergrads: This is a special breed, here. It's widely known how much for Arizona State kids are, (after all, we did only get the "temptations of the flesh" speech twice when traveling for baseball--both trips down here), but until you have sat in a freshman writing class and heard the questions asked and the obnoxious tone in which it is asked...you really haven't experienced it. Also, Mill Ave. is soul crushing. Not unexpected on any count, but FAIL.
Immigration policy enacted: The greater Phoenix area has a great light rail system, which we rode to campus for class the first Tuesday of the semester. It was packed. The train operator was angry. Students didn't care. That was the good half of the journey...but then came the ride back to the car. Like many light rail systems, they have a security guard checking tickets. Fine. Officer Banuelos came and checked my ticket. Then she checked the ticket of the gentleman across the aisle. Then she asked to see his ID. Then she asked to see his green card. I shit you not. He handed them over like it was no big deal while I'm sitting there with my jaw on the floor at the blatant racial profiling by a Mexican. Hey, Banuelos...let me see your green card. Unbelievable. I hate the state of Arizona. EPIC FAIL.
Fender: Corporate offices for Fender musical instruments (guitars) are located in Scottsdale...which would be cool, but there is no store associated with them. So the address we found was simply a large office suite with a ridiculous amount of parking. Seriously. If I was their neighbor in the complex, I would be pissed. Mild FAIL.
Friday/Next Friday: Apparently no one has ever heard of these movies here. Regulation FAIL, but when considering that they hate minorities here, I'm going to chalk it up to that and rebrand it a strong FAIL.

While this particular post followed the formula of most of what I write, this vacation was actually awesome. After being sick the whole time I was home, it was great to hang out with Sarah (who is due for another guest post on the DL), hit a hockey game in which America's hero, Ilya Bryzgalov was between the pipes and to just check out for a while. That being said, I still got a little bit of work done to keep things moving, so I don't have to start from scratch when I get back tomorrow. Call it a win.

Brand Overhaul

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 06:37:00 +0000

Happy new year, readers!

If you read this, you know me. And if you know me, you know that 2010 was a year of major, life-altering changes. I left the comfort of a sizable office at DJA and the familiarity of coaching at Crespi to move north and become a cube monkey at EPR and join the staff of a new (to me) program at SJND. And just for shits and giggles, I decided that I would join the 7 p.m. Sunday mass choir at St. Joseph's just because when I went to mass, it appeared that they were lacking a guitarist.

As much as I squawk about how much I dislike NorCal (which I still do...let's not get carried away with this optimism stuff), half a year removed from this decision, I can look back and know 100 percent that it was the right call. That's right kids. If I had it to do over again, I would do exactly the same thing. In fact, I would have circulated my resume sooner. It's a moderately frightening thought, actually.

The weather up here still sucks. People still don't know how to drive. My apartment is still ghetto. I'm just getting to a point where none of that matters.

I'm operating under great people--at the office, on the field* and at the basilica. That alone makes it all worth it.

I came up here with friends few and far between but have been able to grow the numbers exponentially. My colleagues have been great, and both of the junior staffers I work with on accounts have been promoted (deservedly) from intern to AC in the time I've been here. The Pilots are a great group of kids with a solid amount of talent...cannot wait until March, because it's going to be game on. St. Joseph Spirit Ensemble is just flat out legit any way you slice it. Onus falls on me to do my part with all of them.

2011 is already trending in the right direction...time to be better manager, better coach, better musician and a better individual. With support from my growing network and renewed drive, I have everything I need to take it head on.

*Please note: Despite being the least tenured coach on staff, I consider only one coach my superior--the head guy. The JV coaches are cool...we collaborate, but we're kind of like church and state on game day. Same deal with the pitching coach. My qualifications are not questionable. The rest of the staff knows that.

Shortest (but Best) Update Ever

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Fri, 24 Dec 2010 05:43:00 +0000

SoCal!

Short Update

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Thu, 23 Dec 2010 06:37:00 +0000

Nation is done. One day of work left. SoCal tomorrow night. Foursquare check-in from Cowschwitz coming tomorrow night.

FF Playoff Update - Round 2

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 02:56:00 +0000

And we continue in the semis. And since I know you guys love it, here's some more Jim Mora.

1. Hoya Paranoia

5. Bitzy's Bashers

2. CotonHeadedNinyMugin

3. Probation Nation

QB:

Brady (vs. Packers)

WR:

Johnson (@ Titans)

Fitzgerald (@ Panthers)

Branch (vs. Packers)

RB:

Rice (vs. Saints)

McCoy (@ Giants)

Moreno (@ Raiders)

TE:

Pettigrew (@ Bucs)

Bryant (@ Seahawks)

Def:

Pittsburgh (vs. Jets)

Game Notes:

Coincidentally neither team has any starter playing on a day other than Sunday. Thursday and Monday night games will have no impact on the outcome this week.
The NinyMugins lost out on more than 55 points, as Philip Rivers and Vincent Jackson absolutely torched the 49ers Thursday night, combining for three TD passes.
Pittsburgh's defense will be without its best player (and former Trojan), Troy Polamalu--a fact that will be mitigated only by the fact that it's opponent is (former Trojan), Mark Sanchez, who has developed a bad habit of throwing the ball to the wrong team over the last couple weeks.
Upon further review, NinyMugin receiver DeSean Jackson is still a huge douche.
Speaking of douches, Titans CB Cortland Finnegan may get his ass kicked (again) by Nation receiver Andre Johnson resulting in both players getting ejected (again). Just get your numbers first, Dre.
This is the second round of the playoffs. You kiddin me?!

Interesting - Testing a new Feature

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 00:10:00 +0000

Or it's mean, it's fantastic and it's the entire basis of this blog...

Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T <--fancy

Fantasy Football Update - Playoffs

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 07:48:00 +0000

It's playoff time for the Engage PR fantasy football season, and as of this writing, Probation Nation is down by 27.26 to the Meanie Mathenys, courtesy of Peyton Manning and the fact that the Tennessee Titans are a dumpster fire. The Nation entered the playoffs as the #3 seed, narrowly missing out to the first week bye. Coincidentally, three of the newest Engage employees are leading the standings. The fourth...well...like a good captain, she went down with her 1-12 ship.

Seedings are as follows:

FIRST ROUND BYE

1. Hoya Paranoia - Molly Reynolds

2. CotonHeadedNinyMugin - ~~Courtney Pecora~~ Courtney Pecora's boyfriend

MATCHUPS

3. Probation Nation - me

6. Meanie Mathenys - Neila Matheny

4. Shake'n'Bake - Suzanne Panoplos

5. Bitzy's Bashers - Jeannette Bitz

So, here you go. In the quarterfinals of the EPR playoffs up against a tough team, with which the Nation split this year, the lineup is:

Brady (vs. Bears)

Johnson (vs. Ravens)

Fitzgerald (vs. Broncos)

Driver (vs. Lions)

Rice (vs. Texans)

McCoy (vs. Cowboys)

Moreno (vs. Cardinals)

Pettigrew (vs. Packers)

Bryant (vs. Panthers)

Def

Pittsburgh (vs. Bengals)

PLAYOFFS!

Article of the Day - About a man of the decades

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Sat, 04 Dec 2010 02:12:00 +0000

It's been a while since I've sat down and written here on the DL, and to all two or three of my readers, I apologize profusely. But something happened today that has prompted me to sit down and hit the keyboard.

Los Angeles is a giant city, full of ~~douchebags~~ giant egos that are euphemistically known as "big personalities," but unfortunately, it often seems that behind the personality there is little character.

That could not be further removed from what we're talking about here.

(When you're on the masthead of the LA Times homepage, and it links to a post about how you were pretty much universally revered, you're a legit big deal.)

Joe Cerrell will be remembered by the world for his contributions to politics, PR, the city of Los Angeles, the state of California, etc. His accomplishments are well-documented, as is the fact that he was one of the most genuine and likable people you could ever hope to meet.

He will be remembered by me as the man who not only gave me my start in PR but was a shining example of what all young professionals should aspire to be.

While I'm sure the facts that he was a huge baseball fan and the most loyal of Trojans didn't hurt, in the spring of 2005, he took a chance on a young and rudderless undergraduate PR major/student athlete, who was desperate for an internship to finish out his final semester.

Oh yeah, it was also baseball season. Judging by the fact that I had an awful time finding an internship that spring, not too many employers were willing to take on a candidate with the extremely restrictive schedule that I was facing. He had no such qualms.

When it became clear over the course of my internship that public affairs was not what I was going to end up doing with my PR degree and, therefore, I was not a prospect for a full time position, he counseled me on building my network and navigating the job market.

When my internship was long over, and I was firmly entrenched ~~in misery~~ at my job at Crespi, he wrote me a persona, hand-written note and invited me to the Cerrell Associates holiday party, where he greeted me as though I was still one of his own.

I could go on all night, but that's just how this man was, and I'm sure he never even gave it a second thought. He was a shining example of how to be a well rounded individual: an outstanding professional, an outstanding family man and an outstanding mentor and friend.

No, we definitely didn't lose a big personality today. We lost a true giant. Rest in peace, Joe. Everything I am as a professional, I owe to you. My thoughts and prayers are with your family.

Joe Cerrell, political consultant to the likes of John F. Kennedy and Jerry Brown, dies at 75

Joe Cerrell, a legendary political consultant and consummate schmoozer whose unrelenting but principled style won respect from allies and opponents, died Friday of complications related to pneumonia at St. John's Pleasant Valley Hospital in Camarillo. He was 75.

Cerrell’s list of clients and friendships read like a who’s who of politics from the 1950s forward — John F. Kennedy, Hubert Humphrey, Al Gore, Dianne Feinstein, Willie Brown, Jesse Unruh and both Pat Brown and his son, Gov.-elect Jerry Brown. Instrumental to the careers of numerous politicians, he counted their triumphs among his greatest pleasures and their setbacks among his greatest disappointments.

"Joe Cerrell was a great personal friend and one of the pioneering political consultants in California and the U.S.,” Gore said. “Throughout his life, he was also a great champion of progressive political causes. He advised presidents, candidates for many offices at the national, state and local level, and used his skills and knowledge to help average Americans through times of triumph and trouble.”

In a recent video tribute to Cerrell, Jerry Brown said Cerrell “was around before even the term political consultant was invented.” He added: “When I first thought of running for office for the junior college board of Los Angeles at the end of 1968, he was the first person I spoke with.” With Cerrell’s help, recalled Brown, he finished "first among 124 candidates" for the community college board. (more)