The Film Fiend

REVIEW: The Spider Labyrinth

2011-03-16T14:30:00.009-04:00

The Spider Labyrinth (1988)
Director: Gianfranco Giagni
Writers: Riccardo Aragno, Tonino Cervi
Cast: Roland Wybenga, Paola Rinaldi, Margareta von Krauss
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: After traveling to Budapest, a young scientist discovers that a bizarre cult is guarding the secrets to an ancient mystery.

Thoughts: This loopy little supernatural shocker from Italy is about what you'd expect from the genre: lots of gory murders, a few moments of gratuitous nudity, and an abundance of illogical plotting. To be fair, the picture has plenty of atmosphere to spare, and the sequences of blood-soaked murder are somewhat effective despite the obvious budgetary limitations. The final ten minutes veer off into rampant surrealism, culminating in a baby/spider birth sequence that almost destroyed my brain. The overall tone of the flick is vaguely Lovecraftian, though I can't recall any of the aforementioned author's stories involving bushy Italian crotches and murderous hags who ensnare people with their demonic spit. And people wonder why I spend so much time wallowing in cinematic obscura. Wonky, but totally enjoyable.

Recipe For Success: One Helpful Old Homeless Hermit + Lots of Creepy Eccentrics + One Grisly Old Woman with Serious Dental Hygiene Issues

REVIEW: Hercules Against Karate

2011-03-08T02:42:00.000-05:00

Hercules Against Karate (1974)
Director: Antonio Margheriti
Writers: Sergio Donati, Luciano Vincenzoni
Cast: Alberto Terracina, Fernando Bilbao, and Jolina Mitchell-Collins
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: An obnoxious pretty boy and his dimwitted, musclebound sidekick travel to Hong Kong in order to steal a child from his gangster-loving mom.

Thoughts: I watched this turkey on Netflix in the middle of the night, so you'll excuse me if this particular motion picture doesn't seem entirely real. I can vaguely recall watching a hairy Italian giant and his wiry little buddy lock horns with a bevy of paper-thin villains, but I'll be damned if I can't remember how it was all connected. There might have been some cheap pratfalls, a few crude jokes, and a couple of misguided romantic trysts, but to be perfectly honest, I can't say for sure. The fact that the film remains in my RECENTLY WATCHED queue indicates that it exists on some level, but I'm almost afraid to re-watch the damned thing for fear that my recollection isn't nearly as entertaining as the feature itself. I do believe that I giggled and broke wind at some point, but that may have been involuntary. Make of this what you will.

Recipe For Success: Hairy Italian Man Falling Down + Lots of Terribly Racist Jokes + Tiny Asian Men Falling Down

REVIEW: Deathstalker

2011-01-21T14:38:00.007-05:00

Deathstalker (1983)
Director: James Sbardellati
Writer: Howard R. Cohen
Cast: Rick Hill, Barbi Benton, Richard Brooker
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A muscular warrior embarks on a dangerous quest to stop a villainous wizard by competing in the magic-user's violent tournament.

Thoughts: There's a scene about halfway through this unremarkable sword and sorcery yarn that features a heroic sexual assault on a toady little henchman who has been magically transformed into a woman. It's easily one of the most bizarro moments in the entire film, save for the near rape of a female slave by a foul, disgusting creature that's half human and half pig. In fact, there's probably more rape and perversity sprinkled throughout Deathstalker than actual swordplay, a fact that actually causes this picture to lose a little footing with me. Gratuitous nudity is fine and dandy, but random, pointless misogyny doesn't qualify as entertainment in my neck of the woods. Still, the rubbery monsters and the multiple beheadings are great fun, and help ease the pain of the film's more questionable moments. A moderately amusing mess.

Recipe for Mediocrity: Lots of Big, Bare 80's Ass + Not Nearly Enough Hideous Monsters + One Too Many Sexual Assaults

REVIEW: Hanger

2011-01-01T14:29:00.003-05:00

Hanger (2009)
Director: Ryan Nicholson
Writers: Ryan Nicholson, Patrick Coble
Cast: Debbie Rochon, Dan Ellis, Nathan Dashwood
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: The product of a botched abortion teams up with his biological father to track down the sadistic pimp who murdered his mother.

Thoughts: The words "freakishly horrifying" frequently popped into my head while viewing director Ryan Nicholson's latest self-proclaimed abortion, a sinister and viscerally disturbing flick specifically designed to shock your senses. Not only is the viewer treated to a racially insensitive Chinese stereotype who collects soiled, odorous tampons, audiences will also come face-to-face with an up close and extremely personal colostomy rape, which has to rank as one of the most visually disgusting scenes this jaded film fiend has ever encountered. As foul and ultimately pointless as this whole sordid affair might sound, I thoroughly enjoyed my stay in Nicholson's severely warped universe. And, yes, I know how impossibly sick and perverted that sounds.

Recipe For Success: One Seriously Deformed Anti-Hero + One Cup of Bloody Tampon Tea + Dick Tracy Inspired Character Design

REVIEW: Catfish

2010-10-31T12:10:00.002-04:00

Catfish (2010)
Director: Henry Joost, Ariel Schulman
Writer: N/A
Cast: Yaniv Schulman, Ariel Schulman, Megan Faccio
MPAA Rating: PG-13

Synopsis: An obnoxious group of New York filmmakers discover that their buddy's internet girlfriend isn't exactly who she claims to be.

Thoughts: Although the film has been marketed as a Paranormal Activity-style horror flick, Catfish is actually a documentary about a startling discovery one naive twenty-something makes during an extended and frequently steamy online relationship. The heart of the picture arrives once the filmmakers embark on an ill-fated road trip, one that seems to have a deep and profound effect on everyone involved. Unfortunately, the film may never find its audience, as those who would enjoy it most will no doubt be turned off by its shamelessly misleading marketing campaign. What a pity.

Recipe For Success: An Unexpected Amount of Heart + Watching Hipsters Squirm + People on Facebook Are Crazy. All of Them.

REVIEW: Born to Raise Hell

2010-10-30T02:07:00.009-04:00

Born to Raise Hell (2010)
Director: Lauro Chartrand
Writer: Steven Seagal
Cast: Steven Seagal, Darren Shahlavi, Dan Badarau
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: An American law enforcement agent must pursue a sadistic homicidal maniac through the seedy underbelly of the international drug trade.

Thoughts: Written by Seagal and frequently overdubbed by a shoddy, second-rate impersonator, this generic direct-to-video effort finds the aging action hero returning to the familiar world of international intrigue. Chartrand's admittedly muddled direction, combined with some embarrassingly awful music video-style editing, make the film look cheap and woefully amateur. However, despite the weak story and the overall lack of polish, the action sequences are frequent, intense, and suitably brutal. Born to Raise Hell might be all sorts of entertaining, but it's definitely a step backwards for Seagal.

Recipe For Mediocrity: Meth-Infected Editing + One Horrifying Seagal-Oriented Sex Scene + Eastern European Drug Mules Look Like Supermodels

REVIEW: The Granny

2010-10-29T11:43:00.012-04:00

The Granny (1995)
Director: Luca Bercovici
Writers: Sam Bernard, Luca Bercovici
Cast: Stella Stevens, Shannon Whirry, Luca Bercovici
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: An extremely moody matriarch returns from the grave to exact revenge against her murderous, self-centered offspring.

Thoughts: As a devoted follower of Shannon Whirry's erotic output during the 90's, I'd always hoped she'd make the jump to the mainstream. Instead, we get The Granny, a wacky 90-minute excursion into slapstick horror. Like Troll 2 and Birdemic, this gory direct-to-video offering works on a "so bad it's good" level, though not nearly as well as its contemporaries. Still, it's fun to watch Whirry attempt to play a homely girl, especially one that doesn't shy away from taking her top off. If that doesn't seal the deal for you, stick around for granny's bizarre wrestling match. Now that's entertainment!

Recipe For Success: Shannon Whirry's Attempt at Legitimate Acting + A Slew of Wacky Kills + Castration with a Pair of Scissors

REVIEW: City Under Siege

2010-10-28T14:21:00.007-04:00

City Under Siege (2010)
Director: Benny Chan
Writer: Benny Chan
Cast: Aaron Kwok, Collin Chou, Qi Shu
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: After attempting to loot an abandoned military facility, a group of circus performers find themselves endowed with miraculous powers.

Thoughts: Simply put, City Under Siege is a terrible movie. That having been said, it's actually quite entertaining, though certainly not in the way director Benny Chan had intended. The film careens wildly between slapstick comedy and over-the-top sci-fi action, and while it does sport a handful of nifty fight sequences, it never truly knows what it wants to be. The picture manages to coast by on sheer absurdity alone, but those looking for a serious superhero outing with only be met with weak special effects, lukewarm comedy, and one seriously dopey protagonist. Approach with caution.

Recipe For Mediocrity: Pointless Romance and Hackneyed Melodrama + One Particularly Cheesy Montage + Qi Shu Doing Her Best Liv Tyler Impersonation

TRAILER: Jalmari Helander's Rare Exports

2010-10-27T11:59:00.005-04:00

Source: Beyond Hollywood

I've been waiting for this freaking movie for what seems like ages now. Sadly, I haven't seen a wide North American release date as of this writing, which means I'll have to make due with the new trailer that's been making the rounds as of late. The story revolves around the discovery of Santa Claus, who, apparently, is none too thrilled with being unearthed. Endless chaos and horrific tomfoolery ensues. If that sounds like something you'd like to put your eyeballs on, click the image above to watch the new trailer. It's the bee's knees, particularly if you love Christmas-themed horror flicks.

TRAILER: Le Thanh Son's Clash

2010-10-26T12:07:00.007-04:00

Source: 24 Frames Per Second

Who knew that attempting to retrieve a stolen laptop that's "worth millions on the black market" would be so intense and action-packed? The Vietnamese martial arts extravaganza Clash has been acquired by Indomina Releasing, which means it should, in theory, be heading to North American DVD players sometime very soon. If you haven't watched the trailer yet, by all means, click the image above and sit back as your senses are thoroughly dazzled. Even if the plot is somewhat convoluted, you can't deny has sweetly swift the action sequences appear to be. Consider me impressed.

REVIEW: Reign of Assassins

2010-10-25T17:22:00.009-04:00

Reign of Assassins (2010)
Director: Chao-Bin Su, John Woo
Writer: Chao-Bin Su
Cast: Michelle Yeoh, Woo-sung Jung, Shawn Yue
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: A former assassin disappears with an ancient corpse that promises to restore health and vitality to all who master its secrets.

Thoughts: I love me some Michelle Yeoh, so it's easy to see why John Woo and Chao-Bin Su's martial arts fantasy Reign of Assassins is something I would be hopelessly drawn to. The directors deftly blend tender romance, light comedy, and mind-boggling martial arts into a swift and easily digestible 117 minute visual delight that never really slows down. It's also incredibly fun to watch a movie where evil eunuchs display remarkable kung fu prowess while longing for the days when they had a penis. It's not a classic by any stretch of the imagination, but it's certainly worthy of intense investigation.

Recipe For Success: Michelle Yeoh Kicking Ass + Several Engaging Fight Sequences + Naughty Eunuchs Need Love Too

REVIEW: Robogeisha

2010-10-24T23:15:00.002-04:00

RoboGeisha (2009)
Director: Noboru Iguchi
Writer: Noboru Iguchi
Cast: Naoto Takenaka, Takumi Saito, Suzuki Matsuo
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: A mild-mannered geisha is lured into the clutches of a villainous steel manufacturer who routinely transforms girls into deadly assassins.

Thoughts: Noboru Iguchi's absurdly amusing 2009 actioner RoboGeisha is exactly what fans have come to expect from this ridiculously entertaining genre: loads of over-the-top theatrics, a metric ton of violence, and several adorable Japanese girls dressed in skimpy clothing. Problem is, there's really nothing new here, and despite my overwhelming desire to see things differently, I honestly can't say that I wasn't disappointed with this endeavor. Maybe it will grow on me after repeat viewings, but at the present time, it's really nothing that special. Insert heavy frown here.

Recipe For Success: Acidic Breast Milk + An Array of Silly, Over-the-Top Action Sequences + Did I Mention Acidic Breast Milk?

SPOTLIGHT: Lack of Updates

2010-10-20T13:48:00.008-04:00

In case you were wondering -- and I'm almost positive you weren't -- The Film Fiend isn't dead or defunct. Yours truly has been busy putting the final touches on his upcoming short story collection entitled Twelve (Stories Concerning Love and Death), which should hit retail shelves within the next few weeks. Additionally, writing duties at Beyond Hollywood have thoroughly consumed my free time, so be sure to stop by to see what's up. Finally, my first book Found is currently being adapted into a motion picture by talented indie filmmaker Scott Schirmer. The Film Fiend shall return, though it might be a while before that happens. Keep your eyes peeled for the future, dear readers! The end is nowhere in sight.

REVIEW: MacGruber

2010-09-04T15:25:00.005-04:00

MacGruber (2010)
Director: Jorma Taccone
Writers: Jorma Taccone, John Solomon, Will Forte
Cast: Will Forte, Ryan Phillippe, Kristen Wiig
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: When a madman steals a nuclear missle, former demolitions expert MacGruber is called out of retirement to track him down.

Thoughts: I don't expect anyone to love this movie as much as I do, and that's perfectly okay. The picture's sense of humor is understandably dumb; if watching a naked man dance around with a piece of celery stuffed up his ass isn't your idea of comedy, then you'd be wise to stay far, far away from this particular endeavor. However, Forte and crew are so weirdly charming that even the film's weaker moments are still undeniably enjoyable. However, the easily offended need not apply, as foul language, graphic violence, and bargain basement potty humor are definitely in abundance.

Recipe For Success: Will Forte and his Mullet + Val Kilmer Subtly Chewing Scenery + The Last Five Minutes Are Beyond Wonderful

REVIEW: The Other Guys

2010-09-02T15:59:00.010-04:00

The Other Guys (2010)
Director: Adam McKay
Writers: Adam McKay, Chris Henchy
Cast: Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg, Steve Coogan
MPAA Rating: PG-13

Synopsis: After disaster strikes the department, a pair of bumbling New York City cops try their best to become heroes.

Thoughts: Will Ferrell's shtick is growing old very, very quickly. It's not that he's a terrible comedian, mind you, but his sense of humor is decidedly one note. His latest effort certainly starts out strong -- Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson's respective roles are easily the finest of the entire picture -- but around the halfway point, everything starts to fall apart. If McKay and Ferrell knew how to edit themselves during the scripting phase, perhaps their work wouldn't feel so terminally overlong and grossly uneven. Still, it's fun to see Wahlberg attempt comedy, even if he is a little wooden.

Recipe For Disaster: Gags and Jokes That Run Too Long + Not Enough Steve Coogan + TLC Lyrics as Humor Doesn't Work At All

REVIEW: The Expendables

2010-08-31T11:12:00.007-04:00

The Expendables (2010)
Director: Sylvester Stallone
Writers: Sylvester Stallone, Dave Callaham
Cast: Sylvester Stallone, Dolph Lundgren, Jason Statham
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: Several gnarled, unruly, and extremely badass mercenaries are hired to assassinate a ruthless South American dictator.

Thoughts: Nu Image and Millennium Films have been cranking out this sort of violent, hollow-brained low-budget nonsense for years, but it took genre veteran Sylvester Stallone to figure out how to market this stuff to the masses. Everyone performs as expected, and things blow up very nicely on a fairly consistent basis. In short, it's everything an American action movie should be, and I strongly suspect that many male movie-goers will leave these darkened theaters with overwhelmingly painful erections and soiled, sticky underwear. Don't laugh, tough guy -- you know it's true.

Recipe For Success: Lots of Explosions + Jet Li Complaining About His Size + An Abundance of Fantastic Action Sequences

REVIEW: Life During Wartime

2010-08-28T10:54:00.003-04:00

Life During Wartime (2009)
Director: Todd Solondz
Writer: Todd Solondz
Cast: Shirley Henderson, Allison Janney, Paul Reubens
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: A sequel to Todd Solondz's Happiness, which finds this grossly dysfunctional family picking up the pieces of their shattered lives.

Thoughts: I had high hopes for Solondz's latest cinematic effort, though I believe these lofty expectations have ultimately worked against it. Try as he might, the talented filmmaker can't seem to recapture the demented magic that made Happiness so memorable. Sure, the awkward dialogue, uncomfortable situations, and bizarre sexual hang-ups are all present and accounted for, but it just feels as if Solondz is going through the motions. Had he devoted more time to his characters and their plight, the film may have been a bit stronger. Something's missing, and I'm not quite sure what it is.

Recipe For Mediocrity: Recasting the Family Was a Mistake + Not Enough Paul Reubens + Weirdness Will Only Take You So Far

REVIEW: A Serbian Film

2010-08-26T04:38:00.007-04:00

A Serbian Film (2010)
Director: Srdjan Spasojevic
Writers: Srdjan Spasojevic, Aleksandar Radivojevic
Cast: Srdjan Todorovic, Sergej Trifunovic, Jelena Gavrilovic
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: A former adult film star is lured out of retirement by a mysterious director with a hard-on for extreme pornography.

Thoughts: No joke, dear readers -- this nasty little number almost broke my brain. Not only is this film equipped with an abundance of unsettling sexual imagery and a harrowing performance from Srdjan Todorovic, it also contains something called "newborn porn", which is honestly one of the most horrifyingly unforgettable sequences I've ever encountered. Reaching the end credits feels like a right of passage, one that requires an extended visit to a gifted psychologist upon completion. This is a bold, provocative, and exhilarating experience that is definitely not for the weak of heart.

Recipe For Success: Loads of Horrifying Imagery + Srdjan Todorovic + I've Never Seen Anyone Murdered with An Erection Before

REVIEW: The Defender

2010-08-22T02:17:00.004-04:00

The Defender (2004)
Director: Dolph Lundgren
Writer: Douglas W. Miller
Cast: Dolph Lundgren, Jerry Springer, Shakara Ledard
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A former Gulf War POW-turned-national security agent finds himself in the midst of political intrigue deep within the bowels of Romania.

Thoughts: Dolph Lundgren's directorial debut is a little clunky, to be sure, but it's definitely a cut above the other like-minded direct-to-video action/thrillers you're likely to finding languishing at the bottom of your local Netflix distribution center. Granted, it feels more like a dejected low-budget pilot for a program on the USA Network than an actual motion picture, but Dolph's willingness to assault your senses with a plethora of gore-soaked action sequences helps ease the pain of the weak script and the shoddy acting. The twist might be lame, but the finale is outstanding.

Recipe For Success: Lots of Bloody Shoot-Outs + Jerry Spring as The President + Dolph Lundgren Doing His Thang

REVIEW: Road Kill

2010-08-18T14:40:00.003-04:00

Road Kill (2010)
Director: Dean Francis
Writer: Clive Hopkins
Cast: Bob Morley, Xavier Samuel, Sophie Low
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: Brain dead mouth-breathers on a vacation in the Australian Outback are tormented by a driverless truck called a "road train".

Thoughts: Take four of the most obnoxious paper thin characters you can imagine, given them an mysterious truck to whine about, and watch in absolute horror as nothing remotely interesting ever transpires. Sure, these hideously lame protagonists have a trigger happy stranger to contend with, and there's always the origins of the titular vehicle to ponder, but overall there's really not a whole lot to wrap your head around. Instead of giving us a simple straightforward thriller, Francis opts for something a bit more surreal, resulting in a nearly unwatchable cinematic mess. The only joy in the entire picture is watching these people die slowly, and that's assuming you can sit through the whole movie without succumbing to the urge to drink your own urine. Strike one for the Fangoria Frightfest, though this isn't entirely surprising.

Recipe For Disaster: Impossibly Slow Pacing + One Terrible Collection of Actors + The Defensive Power of Unexpected Piss

SPOTLIGHT: Smile

2010-08-14T14:02:00.006-04:00

Source: The Film Reel

These days, it would seem that freakishly ambitious short films I find scattered throughout the YouTube universe are 95% scarier than the stuff that passes for horror currently playing at your local neighborhood cineplex. Smile, a wicked combination of CGI and live action, is a perfect example of my theory in motion. Take a few minutes out of your life to stick your feeble little mind all over this one, won't you?

REVIEW: Killer Weekend

2010-08-13T02:31:00.000-04:00

Killer Weekend (2007)
Director: Rob Walker
Writers: Edward Rubio, John Daly
Cast: Eric Roberts, Frida Farrell, Cherie Johnson
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: A group of attractive twenty-somethings are terrorized by a violent psychopath during a weekend party at the madman's mansion.

Thoughts: Director Rob Walker's 2007 straight-to-video slasher Killer Weekend is a hideous motion picture, plain and simple. It's visually defunct, poorly directed, awkwardly scripted -- in short, it's the sort of movie you're likely to find languishing in the wee hours of the night on some podunk basic cable channel in the middle of nowhere. That having been said, the movie is an absolute riot, powered by a fearless performance by none other than Eric Roberts, an actor who is literally down for anything. Want him to screw a corpse while its severed head looks on in agony? He's your man. Watching him dispatch this annoying group of youngsters is beyond entertaining, especially when he decides to brandish his trusty samurai sword. Killer Weekend is unmistakably awful, though bad movie aficionados should adore it with every icky fiber of their being.

Recipe For Success: Eric Roberts in Top Form + Absolutely No Logic Whatsoever + Somebody Please Finish Off The Groundskeeper

REVIEW: Bar Legend

2010-07-29T11:24:00.010-04:00

Bar Legend (2006)
Director: Beom-gu Cho
Writers: Beom-gu Cho, Jeong-su Park, Su-jin Park
Cast: Keon-hyeong Park, Cheon-hee Lee, MC Mong
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: Three lifelong friends reunite to take down a vicious gang that's slowly moving in on their old turf.

Thoughts: In the grand scheme of things, Beom-gu Cho's dramatic gangster outing Bar Legend (aka Three Fellas) seems more like a Korean version of Stand By Me than a full-on, no-holds-barred action extravaganza. The film focuses its narrative strength on the estranged relationship between three aimless twenty-somethings, which, in turn, causes the action to take a back seat to the plot. However, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. Of course, those who signed on for yet another whiz-bang South Korean actioner loaded with a metric ton of well-choreographed fisticuffs will no doubt be disappointed with the end result, as the director lenses these confrontations in a very subdued, realistic manner. Personally, I feel this frequently brutal and occasionally introspective endeavor rests easily in the same league as Shin Han Sol's infinitely underrated coming-of-age saga The Art of Fighting. It might not be what you were expecting, but it's fantastic nonetheless.

Recipe For Success: Three Charismatic Leads + Plenty of Kinetic Fights + You Don't Mess With the No Touch Gang

REVIEW: Operation Endgame

2010-07-25T03:27:00.006-04:00

Operation Endgame (2010)
Director: Fouad Mikati
Writers: Sam Levinson, Brian Watanabe
Cast: Rob Corddry, Ellen Barkin, Maggie Q
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A top secret team of highly-trained assassins wage hyper-violent war amongst themselves after their leader is murdered.

Thoughts: It may be loud, crude, and needlessly violent, but up-and-coming director Fouad Mikati's feature-length debut Operation Endgame is an ungodly amount of fun. The script is extremely witty, the action is surprisingly brutal, and the cast is simply top-notch. And while Ellen Barkin, Jeffrey Tambor, Ving Rhames, Bob Odenkirk, and Zach Galifianakis are in full force, the film pretty much belongs to Rob Corddry. His shtick is essentially one note -- deliver expletive-laden dialogue laced with obscene imagery -- but it certainly keeps the film afloat during its slower moments. Operation Endgame, much to this unapologetic action nerd's giddy delight, is thoroughly enjoyable, a near-perfect blend of unflinching action and mean-spirited humor. Quite the accomplishment for a filmmaker's first time out of the proverbial gate.

Recipe For Success: Rob Corddry's Foul Mouth + Some Surprisingly Brutal Fights + One Nose in a Paper Shredder

REVIEW: Date Night

2010-07-06T01:48:00.008-04:00

Date Night (2010)
Director: Shawn Levy
Writer: Josh Klausner
Cast: Steve Carell, Tina Fey, Mark Wahlberg
MPAA Rating: PG-13

Synopsis: After stealing a reservation a swanky New York City restaurant, a bored New Jersey unexpectedly find themselves hunted by the mob and the police.

Thoughts: Regardless of the picture's extremely impressive star power, director Shawn Levy's madcap comedy Date Night is a B-movie from top to bottom. The film begins with an unexpectedly heartfelt examination of a decaying suburban marriage, though Levy and crew quickly ditch this theme for a series of increasingly goofy set pieces that culminate in one of the silliest car chase sequences in recent memory. Oddly, Date Night excels when it takes time out of its zany schedule to ponder the quieter moments of the story, which are delivered with near-perfection by Carell and Fey. However, the funniest moments come not from the stars but from Mila Kunis and James Franco, whose unbalanced relationship could fuel its own motion picture. This is, essentially, Adventures in Babysitting for unhappy middle-aged breeders. Good, but not great.

Recipe For Mediocrity: One Grossly Uneven Script + Ugly Digital Cinematography + Not Enough Kunis and Franco