The Film Fiend

REVIEW: Bar Legend

2010-07-29T11:24:00.010-04:00

Bar Legend (2006)
Director: Beom-gu Cho
Writers: Beom-gu Cho, Jeong-su Park, Su-jin Park
Cast: Keon-hyeong Park, Cheon-hee Lee, MC Mong
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: Three lifelong friends reunite to take down a vicious gang that's slowly moving in on their old turf.

Thoughts: In the grand scheme of things, Beom-gu Cho's dramatic gangster outing Bar Legend (aka Three Fellas) seems more like a Korean version of Stand By Me than a full-on, no-holds-barred action extravaganza. The film focuses its narrative strength on the estranged relationship between three aimless twenty-somethings, which, in turn, causes the action to take a back seat to the plot. However, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. Of course, those who signed on for yet another whiz-bang South Korean actioner loaded with a metric ton of well-choreographed fisticuffs will no doubt be disappointed with the end result, as the director lenses these confrontations in a very subdued, realistic manner. Personally, I feel this frequently brutal and occasionally introspective endeavor rests easily in the same league as Shin Han Sol's infinitely underrated coming-of-age saga The Art of Fighting. It might not be what you were expecting, but it's fantastic nonetheless.

Recipe For Success: Three Charismatic Leads + Plenty of Kinetic Fights + You Don't Mess With the No Touch Gang

REVIEW: Operation Endgame

2010-07-25T03:27:00.006-04:00

Operation Endgame (2010)
Director: Fouad Mikati
Writers: Sam Levinson, Brian Watanabe
Cast: Rob Corddry, Ellen Barkin, Maggie Q
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A top secret team of highly-trained assassins wage hyper-violent war amongst themselves after their leader is murdered.

Thoughts: It may be loud, crude, and needlessly violent, but up-and-coming director Fouad Mikati's feature-length debut Operation Endgame is an ungodly amount of fun. The script is extremely witty, the action is surprisingly brutal, and the cast is simply top-notch. And while Ellen Barkin, Jeffrey Tambor, Ving Rhames, Bob Odenkirk, and Zach Galifianakis are in full force, the film pretty much belongs to Rob Corddry. His shtick is essentially one note -- deliver expletive-laden dialogue laced with obscene imagery -- but it certainly keeps the film afloat during its slower moments. Operation Endgame, much to this unapologetic action nerd's giddy delight, is thoroughly enjoyable, a near-perfect blend of unflinching action and mean-spirited humor. Quite the accomplishment for a filmmaker's first time out of the proverbial gate.

Recipe For Success: Rob Corddry's Foul Mouth + Some Surprisingly Brutal Fights + One Nose in a Paper Shredder

REVIEW: Date Night

2010-07-06T01:48:00.008-04:00

Date Night (2010)
Director: Shawn Levy
Writer: Josh Klausner
Cast: Steve Carell, Tina Fey, Mark Wahlberg
MPAA Rating: PG-13

Synopsis: After stealing a reservation a swanky New York City restaurant, a bored New Jersey unexpectedly find themselves hunted by the mob and the police.

Thoughts: Regardless of the picture's extremely impressive star power, director Shawn Levy's madcap comedy Date Night is a B-movie from top to bottom. The film begins with an unexpectedly heartfelt examination of a decaying suburban marriage, though Levy and crew quickly ditch this theme for a series of increasingly goofy set pieces that culminate in one of the silliest car chase sequences in recent memory. Oddly, Date Night excels when it takes time out of its zany schedule to ponder the quieter moments of the story, which are delivered with near-perfection by Carell and Fey. However, the funniest moments come not from the stars but from Mila Kunis and James Franco, whose unbalanced relationship could fuel its own motion picture. This is, essentially, Adventures in Babysitting for unhappy middle-aged breeders. Good, but not great.

Recipe For Mediocrity: One Grossly Uneven Script + Ugly Digital Cinematography + Not Enough Kunis and Franco

REVIEW: The Dark Backward

2010-07-03T02:50:00.009-04:00

The Dark Backward (1991)
Director: Adam Rifkin
Writer: Adam Rifkin
Cast: Judd Nelson, Bill Paxton, Wayne Newton
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A geeky garbage man with dreams of becoming a stand-up comedian discovers a third arm growing out of his back.

Thoughts: Writer/director Adam Rifkin's highly misunderstood 1991 cult favorite The Dark Backward is one of my all-time favorite movies. That being said, how this bizarre picture ever managed to see the light of day is truly anyone's guess. Although Rifkin's script provides the fuel, the film is powered by none other than Judd Nelson, an actor I once thought incapable of delivering such a bold, unorthodox performance. Cinematic goofball Bill Paxton is the demented Ying to Nelson's straight-laced Yang, which allows for copious amounts of over-the-top scene chewing and a plethora of memorable moments. Rifkin's garbage-choked universe is the perfect setting for these highly unusual characters; nothing ever seems forced or out-of-place, adding a sense of realism to even the most outlandish of sequences. I'll never tire of watching it.

Recipe For Success: One Truly Unique Script + A Striking and Unusual Visual Style + Judd "John Bender" Nelson

REVIEW: 8mm

2010-07-02T12:26:00.007-04:00

8mm (1999)
Director: Joel Schumacher
Writer: Andrew Kevin Walker
Cast: Nicolas Cage, Joaquin Phoenix, Peter Stormare
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A private investigator is hired by a grieving widow to investigate the authenticity of a suspected snuff film.

Thoughts: When I saw director Joel Schumacher's nasty 1999 shocker 8mm in theaters eleven years ago, I was absolutely floored. Not only had Schumacher delivered a solid, seriously warped motion picture about an extremely controversial subject matter, he presented the material without turning the whole affair into a cheap exploitation flick. Even in this vile and explicitly violent day and age, this strong and emotionally devastating little thriller holds up surprisingly well. The cast -- including Peter Stormare as a pretentious porn director -- is a major reason for the film's success, though Andrew Kevin Walker's whip-smart script also deserves some of the credit. And while many tend to believe that 8mm is the poor man's Seven, labeling it a wannabe only serves to sell it short. Modern mainstream thrillers are rarely this edgy.

Recipe For Success: An Intelligent Take on a Touchy Subject + Joaquin Phoenix + When Tom Wells Calls Mary's Mom, I Cry

SPOTLIGHT: We Watch Stuff

2010-07-01T15:54:00.006-04:00

Website: We Watch Stuff

Perpetrated by two extremely witty ladies, We Watch Stuff features the cinematic musings of bad movie aficionados Ashley Thomas Cooper and Danielle Gabbard as they chronicle their misadventures through the wonky world of "classic" film. Intelligent, well-written, and frequently hilarious. Besides, it's hard to hate a blog penned by someone who thoroughly enjoys Thankskilling, Hard Rock Zombies, and Syfy original movies. Bookmark immediately? If you don't, I may kill you. Figuratively speaking.

REVIEW: The Promotion

2010-06-30T10:14:00.009-04:00

The Promotion (2008)
Director: Steve Conrad
Writer: Steve Conrad
Cast: Sean William Scott, John C. Reilly, Jenna Fischer
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: Two dysfunctional assistant managers at a growing grocery retailer compete for the same promotion.

Thoughts: Written by the same guy responsible for penning the grossly underrated Nicolas Cage outing The Weather Man, Steve Conrad's emotional and realistic comedic drama The Promotion is the sort of movie that tends to polarize most viewers. On the surface, the feature appears to be nothing more than your average, run-of-the-mill at-work comedy peppered with familiar faces and obscene dialogue. However, beneath the goofiness beats a warm, heartfelt story of two men who want nothing more than to better themselves for the sake of their loved ones. There's no clear hero or villain -- the promotion ends up going to the most qualified candidate, regardless of how they played the game. For those who have slaved away in the trenches of retail, The Promotion has particular resonance. A fantastically understated masterpiece.

Recipe For Success: Sean William Scott in Top Form + John C. Reilly + Gil Bellows Discussing the Jacking of Dicks

REVIEW: Omega Cop

2010-06-25T12:25:00.001-04:00

Omega Cop (1990)
Director: Paul Kyriazi
Writers: Denny Grayson, Salli McQuaid, Joe Meyer, Paul Kyriazi
Cast: Ron Marchini, Adam West, Meg Thayer
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: In the not-do-distant future, the only thing that stands between you and the unscrupulous slave trade is John Travis.

Thoughts: Director Paul Kyriazi's zany 1990 post-apocalyptic wake-up call Omega Cop thoughtfully explores what, precisely, a one-man army would do if he or she were forced to contend with ruffians and scoundrels in a savage world where water is a commodity. The picture, while entertaining, is the sort of zero-grade, third-tier malarkey that often finds its way onto local television channels in the wee hours of the night, complete with scantily clad women, sloppy martial arts choreography, Adam West, and plenty of memorable lines of horrendous dialogue. In other words, it borders on cinematic genius. Icing on the cake: I bought it used for fifty cents. Do keep your eyes peeled for the sequel, Karate Cop, as it makes for a swell companion piece.

Recipe For Success: Ron Marchini's Hat + That Fat Guy + Enough Martial Arts Action to Last You All Freaking Week

REVIEW: The A-Team

2010-06-21T23:41:00.007-04:00

The A-Team (2010)
Director: Joe Carnahan
Writers: Joe Carnahan, Brian Bloom, Skip Woods
Cast: Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Jessica Biel
MPAA Rating: PG-13

Synopsis: A squadron of badass military types are framed for a crime they didn't commit, leaving them no choice but to clear their name.

Thoughts: Rumor has it that it took no less than 11 highly-paid Hollywood writers and several million dollars in production costs to bring the script for Joe Carnahan's excessively enjoyable summer blockbuster The A-Team into the green light. For the life of me, I can't seem to figure out why. After all, it's not like we're dealing with an intellectual juggernaut built upon intricate plotting and elaborate character motivations. All that's required is for Neeson and Cooper to chew scenery while things blow up in the background. Thankfully, each and every action sequence is suitably empty-headed and completely over-the-top, which is precisely what made the television series so entertaining. The A-Team might be stupid, but damn if it isn't sweet.

Recipe For Success: Lots and Lots of Summertime Explosions + Bradley Cooper's Comic Timing + Please, Please Let There Be Sequels

REVIEW: The Book of Eli

2010-06-14T23:49:00.008-04:00

The Book of Eli (2010)
Director: The Hughes Brothers
Writer: Gary Whitta
Cast: Denzel Washington, Gary Oldman, Mila Kunis
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: In a twisted post-apocalyptic world, a mysterious stranger must protect a mystical book from a deranged, power-hungry tyrant.

Thoughts: The Hughes Brothers are amazing directors, but their latest cinematic adventure, 2010's The Book of Eli, is probably their weakest effort thus far. It also proves without a shadow of a doubt that not every thriller produced under the jaded Hollywood umbrella needs a twist ending. Are there clues scattered throughout to support this last-minute revelation? Perhaps. However, it adds nothing whatsoever to the story, except, of course, to reinforce the picture's wonky religious undertones. I can accept divine guidance as a plot device as long as it's not structured around a third reel gimmick that ultimately diminishes the film's overall impact. As an action flick, it's amazing. As a meditation on blind faith, it lacks substance.

Recipe for Mediocrity: Denzel Washington's Lackluster Performance + One Bored Mila Kunis + The Twist is Weak Sauce in a Breakable Bottle

REVIEW: Youth in Revolt

2010-06-12T01:05:00.010-04:00

Youth in Revolt (2009)
Director: Miguel Arteta
Writer: Gustin Nash
Cast: Michael Cera, Portia Doubleday, Jean Smart
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: Perpetual loser Nick Twisp attempts to woo the girl of his dreams with the help of his chain smoking, hell raising alter ego Francois.

Thoughts: If you're tired of seeing Michael Cera play a hapless, sexually frustrated dweeb, then director Miguel Arteta's Youth in Revolt is definitely a film you should consider avoiding. Although the film covers a lot of material in the span of 89 minutes, the story ultimately feels limp, lifeless, as if someone let the air out of everyone on-screen and propped their deflated corpses in front of a camera. Unfortunately, Michael Cera simply cannot portray anyone other than Michael Cera, and while his alter ego is a bit of fresh air, his role in the story is nominal, and often feels like a total afterthought. The few fleeting moments of hilarity aren't worth the time and effort it takes to finish this meandering cinematic disappointment.

Recipe for Disaster: Michael Cera playing Michael Cera + A Great Cast with Nothing to Do + Girls are Evil, Manipulating Masterminds. Get Over It.

NEWS: Four Minutes from Showgirls 2

2010-06-07T03:01:00.006-04:00

Source: Twitch

I honestly don't know what to say. Watching the footage from German director Marc Vorlander's unofficial follow-up to Paul Verhoeven's cult classic Showgirls is downright painful. The fact that this thing even exists boggles the civilized mind, especially considering this unnecessary monstrosity cost $20 million to make. Where the budget went is anybody's guess. If you think you can withstand the agony, click the picture positioned above this warning. I'm not kidding, folks -- it's uncomfortable to look at.

Not surprisingly, I can't wait to see it.

REVIEW: Con Air

2010-06-06T16:03:00.013-04:00

Con Air (1997)
Director: Simon West
Writer: Scott Rosenberg
Cast: Nicolas Cage, John Cusack, John Malkovich
MPAA Rating:R

Synopsis: A military-trained redneck felon must stop a large group of violent criminals who have taken over a prisoner transport plane.

Thoughts: The Jerry Bruckheimer-produced actioner Con Air was one of the loudest, dumbest, and most deliriously enjoyable genre flicks to run screaming like a battered Detroit hooker out of the suburban American cineplex during the summer of 1997. The film is shamelessly, unapologetically stupid, and requires the audience to accept all sorts of nonsensical plot devices over the course of the film's bloated 115 minute journey through gun fights, explosions, and an assortment of head-scratchingly awful one-liners. Still, it's hard not to like a movie that features Cage as a mullet-sporting ex-con who murders a hardened criminal for not putting a stuffed rabbit back in its box. The ending might be clunky and ugly, but it's damn fine entertainment.

Recipe For Success: Nicolas Cage and His Mullet + John Malkovich Chewing Scenery + John Cusack's Bid For Action Hero Status

REVIEW: The Collector

2010-06-04T09:14:00.010-04:00

The Collector (2009)
Director: Marcus Dunstan
Writers: Patrick Melton, Marcus Dunstan
Cast: Josh Stewart, Juan Fernandez, Andrea Roth
MPAA Rating:R

Synopsis: A would-be burglar must battle a bizarre killer who has turned an isolated farmhouse into one enormous booby trap.

Thoughts: Considering I'd rather wipe my ass with a dead kitten than watch any of the recent entries in the Saw franchise, my reluctance to thoroughly investigate "Feast" scribe Marcus Dunstan's The Collector was understandable. Surprisingly, the writer-turned-director's feature-length debut is a remarkably well-executed albeit entirely implausible excursion into gore-soaked suspense. Fortunately for us, the story moves at such a frantic, breakneck pace that you'll soon forget all about the illogical nature of the film's insanely goofy premise. Josh Stewart's sympathetic turn as the film's amoral home invader, meanwhile, helps keep the shenanigans from becoming completely nonsensical and convoluted. Theatrical American horror is rarely this ballsy or exciting.

Recipe For Success: One Seriously Freaky Score + Juan Fernandez + Shotguns are Good for Blowing Dogs in Half

TRAILER: The Destroyed Man

2010-06-03T01:41:00.006-04:00

Source: Film Smash

REVIEW: Adventures of Power

2010-05-14T02:15:00.007-04:00

Adventures of Power (2008)
Director: Ari Gold
Writer: Ari Gold
Cast: Ari Gold, Shoshannah Stern, Adrian Grenier
MPAA Rating: PG-13

Synopsis: A misunderstood small-town nobody with a very unusual talent embarks on a journey to Newark to compete in an air drumming competition.

Thoughts: Writer/director Ari Gold's insanely hilarious and oddly touching 2008 comedy Adventures of Power opens with a montage set to "Kyrie" by Mister Mister, a sequence which skillfully sets the tone for the outlandish story that follows. Gold -- whose lanky appearance recalls Jon Heder's unforgettable turn in Jared Hess' classic Napoleon Dynamite -- is easily the film's centerpiece; this outlandish take on the proverbial "hero's journey" wouldn't have worked without his awkward charm, not to mention his skillful direction and his strangely affecting script. Fans of off-beat cinema, as well as devoted followers Entourage star Adrian Grenier, will spend days trading quotes and rocking out to Phil Collins when no one is looking. Trust me on this one.

Recipe for Success: Ari Gold's Phenomenal Performance + The Last 30 Thirty Minutes + Chi Ling Chiu, I Kid You Not

REVIEW: Lollilove

2010-05-10T22:12:00.009-04:00

Lollilove (2004)
Director: Jenna Fischer
Writers: Jenna Fischer, Peter Alton
Cast: Jenna Fischer, James Gunn, Peter Alton
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: Overwhelmed by their financial success, James and Jenna Gunn set out on a mission to deliver inspirational lollipops to the homeless.

Thoughts: Before there was NBC's version of The Office, there was writer/director Jenna Fischer's mean-spirited mockumentary Lollilove. This surprisingly sardonic comedy is very similar in style and execute to Fischer's current primetime day job, and suggests that the talented actress contributes more to the hit show than cutesy camera mugs. Gunn is frequently funny, particularly when the hot-tempered couple find themselves at odds over the creation of their somewhat misguided charitable efforts. However, the ultimate demise of couple's real-life relationship, combined with the feature's numerous martial squabbles, often make for a uncomfortable viewing experience. Still, Lollilove is damn-near brilliant, even if Fischer's execution is a little rough around the edges.

Recipe For Success: Jenna Fischer and Peter Alton's Script + James Gunn Chewing Scenery + Homeless Guys Love Stabbing Gash

REVIEW: Birdemic - Shock and Terror

2010-05-04T13:20:00.009-04:00

Birdemic: Shock and Terror (2008)
Director: James Nguyen
Writer: James Nguyen
Cast: Alan Bagh, Whitney Moore, Colton Osborne
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: In the wake of their budding romance, a young couple must contend with a swarm of deadly, blood-thirsty eagles.

Thoughts: In the world of woefully bad movies, James Nguyen's truly unforgettable 2008 "romantic thriller" Birdemic is in a league of its own. That being said, this unintentionally hilarious endeavor is quite possibly one of the most enjoyable viewing experiences I've had so far this year. The film is overloaded with wretched acting, weird editing, and some of the worst audio you're likely to find outside of a community college course on cinematic sound design. Nguyen's bizarre abomination is no doubt powered by the same wonky engine that has made Tommy Wiseau's The Room an internet sensation. Not surprisingly, Birdemic is one of the best worst horror flicks about killer birds, fashion models, and software salesmen you're likely to find in theaters. Do not pass this one by.

Recipe For Success: Loads of Stilted Acting + One Remarkably Uneven Script + The Worst CGI Effects Known to Man

TRAILER: Jonah Hex

2010-05-04T12:22:00.003-04:00

Jonah Hex (2010)
Director: Jimmy Hayward
Writers: Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor
Cast: Josh Brolin, John Malkovich, Megan Fox
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: The US government hires mysterious gunslinger Jonah Hex to track down and eliminate a ruthless terrorist.

Why I'm Excited: Josh Brolin Kicking Ass + Otherworldly Revenge Plot + Another Reason Not To Hate Megan Fox

IMAGE: The Human Centipede

2010-05-03T12:19:00.000-04:00

"Feed her!"

REVIEW: Fatal Contact

2010-05-01T16:05:00.003-04:00

Fatal Contact (2006)
Director: Dennis Law
Writer: Dennis Law
Cast: Jacky Wu, Ronald Cheng, Miki Yeung
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: Persuaded by his shady, opportunistic lady friend, a kung fu champion participates in a series of increasingly violent underground fights.

Thoughts: Like most kung fu movies these days, veteran action director Dennis Law's 2006 fight fest Fatal Contact (aka Underground Fist) is packaged with a rather disappointing storyline that often dips its toes into the murky waters of needless melodrama. If you can ignore the dodgy plotting -- especially the film's hackneyed prostitution subplot -- and the incredibly downbeat finale, Fatal Contact will reward you with a handful of genuinely stunning fight sequences. Jacky Wu makes these well-choreographed moments look ridiculously easy, a testament to his skills as an actor and a martial artist. A tense albeit depressing good time.

Recipe For Success: Jacky Wu + Several Impressive Fight Sequences + Never Trust Cute Chinese Girls Who Love Kung Fu

REVIEW: Kick-Ass

2010-04-29T12:23:00.004-04:00

Kick-Ass (2010)
Director: Matthew Vaughn
Writers: Jane Goldman, Matthew Vaughn
Cast: Aaron Johnson, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Chloe Moretz
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: A nerdy high school student dons a scuba outfit and becomes Kick-Ass, a lackluster superhero who takes on the city's toughest criminals.

Thoughts: Although certain individuals have taken issue with the film's over-the-top approach to comic book violence, Matthew Vaughn's mean-spirited superhero epic Kick-Ass is truly one of the freshest, most captivating superhero films to come out of Hollywood in ages. The controversy surrounding the Chloe Moretz's performance is understandable, though the film's depiction of child-oriented vigilantism is ultimately too silly to be taken as anything other than farcical comedy. The pacing is brisk, the plethora of action sequences are kinetic, and Nicolas Cage is suitably restrained. Kick-Ass might be cruel and hyper violent, but it's nothing short of entertaining.

Recipe For Success: Chloe Moretz & Aaron Johnson + Tons of Crazy Action + Nicolas Cage's Adam West Impersonation is Spot-On

REVIEW: Metropia

2010-04-28T15:34:00.005-04:00

Metropia (2009)
Director: Tarik Saleh
Writer: Fredrik Edin
Cast: Vincent Gallo, Juliette Lewis, Udo Kier
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: In a dystopian, Kafka-esque future, a man investigates the mysterious origins of the voice living inside his head.

Thoughts: Tarik Saleh's visually stimulating science fiction nightmare Metropia is equal parts Metropolis, 1984, and Brazil. Using a peculiar animation style to tell his story, Saleh and screenwriter Fredrik Edin explore the dangers of mind control and the price one man must pay to unravel the truth. As extraordinary as the art direction may be, the story itself is somewhat stale, especially in the payoff department. Fans of this sort of narrative will figure out where the plot is headed a good sixty minutes before the finale arrives. However, the unusual imagery, combined with some strong voice work, help ease the pain and discomfort of the familiar storyline.

Recipe For Success: Vincent Gallo & Juliette Lewis + Mind Control Via Dandruff Shampoo + An Array of Intriguing Visuals

TRAILER: MacGruber

2010-04-28T11:43:00.004-04:00

MacGruber (2010)
Director: Jorma Taccone
Writers: Will Forte, John Solomon, Jorma Taccone
Cast: Will Forte, Kristen Wiig, Ryan Phillippe
MPAA Rating: R

Synopsis: Decorated soldier MacGruber leaps into action when his nemesis Dieter Von Cunth acquires a nuclear warhead.

Why I'm Excited: Will Forte + Lots of Action-Oriented Comedy + Val "Direct-to-Video" Kilmer's Back on the Big Screen

REVIEW: Kung Fu Flid

2010-02-02T01:04:00.010-05:00

Kung Fu Flid (2009)
Director: Xavier Leret
Writer: Xavier Leret
Cast: Mat Fraser, Frank Harper, Terry Stone
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Synopsis: A skinny martial artist with tiny arms valiantly attempts to locate the men who shot his wife and kidnapped his daughter.

Thoughts: While the insanely colorful DVD artwork for Xavier Leret's Kung Fu Flid (aka Unarmed But Dangerous) suggests wacky martial arts mayhem, the movie itself is kind of boring. Sure, wannabe action star Mat Fraser uses his deformed limbs and crazy legs to take down a handful of nasty villains, but these moments are in extremely short order. Most of the entertainment derived from this wonky exploitation piece is completely unintentional, as there are very few moments when writer/director Leret actually gets things right. The bordello showdown, however, is classic.

Recipe For Mediocrity: Needlessly Plodding Script + Mat Fraser's Overwrought Acting + Not Enough Martial Arts