I drew this myself, because there weren’t pictures of moms with pitchforks on the internet, AND I’m a pretty damn good artist.

I don’t know about you, but it seems to me, whenever a holiday comes around there are plenty of bloggers out there who pick up their torches and pitchforks to go after the current “Hallmark Holiday”. Quite frankly, I’m kinda tired of it all.

Sure, Hallmark was founded in 1910 and Mother’s Day became an official U.S. Holiday in 1914. But if you do any research, you’ll find that celebrating mothers was happening way before people found out that the world is round and stumbled their way to America. This means Hallmark didn’t invent Mother’s Day, so stop giving credit where credit isn’t due.

Celebrating mothers is okay and if your family’s way of celebrating Mother’s Day is buying gifts or getting a sappy/funny card as a token of their love, maybe don’t be a bitch about it.

HAVEN’T ANY OF YOU READ THE 5 LOVE LANGUAGES?!?!?!?

Some people’s way of showing affection and love IS through giving/receiving gifts.

What if your husband and/or child is a gift giver? What if that’s how they show you they love you and they WANT to give you a gift for Mother’s Day? What if getting you something nice feels good, to them?

What am I supposed to do when my 12 year old hands me $5 of his own money in a homemade card and says, “Happy Mother’s Day.” Am I supposed to belittle him and tell him that giving people all your money isn’t how you show love? Do I tell him that he can’t give me his money? Do I go on and on about how the gift he chose to give me isn’t good or appropriate and that I don’t want his gift?

How about when my husband sneaks away from work (He works at home, it’s a little hard for him to sneak out.) to get me a “Hallmark” card from the grocery store and a beautiful pink rose from the local florist? What should I do? Should I stomp around the house with my pitchfork and scream about the insanities of my family showing me extra love and appreciation on one fucking afternoon? Should I throw the flower and the card in the trash because “HOW DARE HE BUY INTO ANOTHER HALLMARK HOLIDAY AND SPEND A LITTLE EXTRA ENERGY AND MONEY ON ME, ON THE SECOND SUNDAY IN MAY!”?

Or when my step-daughter makes me a bracelet that has the word “MOM” on it? Shall I remind her that I’m not her “real” mother and in this house we do NOT celebrate anything extra or special. Every fucking day should be special and her tiny effort on this one day doesn’t make up for all the bullshit I go through trying to raise her?

Let’s not forget those children I have lost. Should I not weep a few tears of sadness for the daughter who never even got a chance to wish me a “Happy Mother’s Day”? Should my heart not break for my grown son, whom I can no longer hold in my arms because our paths have gone separate ways?

Mother’s Day is what you make of it and if you let yourself get wrapped up in a bunch of media bullshit than too bad for you. Maybe stop watching commercials like the rest of us who own DVRs?

And if you spend your weekend being nasty to your family because it’s Mother’s Day, instead of enjoying yourself, that’s your own deal. Just maybe…don’t be such a bitch about it.

Happy Mother’s Day,

Something interesting about Christine’s life is that Mister is retired, so this means the two of them spend almost every waking moment together. This might drive some couples batty, but they thrive on it. (I get where they’re coming from. Nathan works at home and I homeschool. We’re together all-the-time and I wouldn’t have it any other way.) Christine and Mister are BFFs and love to do all sorts of stuff together, like ride their bikes. Um…no…not the pedal kind that I ride. I’m talking about freakin’ MOTORCYCLES!

Occasionally Christine will blog over at The Dash Between. Only occasionally because she’s busy living life to the fullest with Mister. I hope you enjoy her T.M.I. Tuesday story and keep an eye on her blog.

~The MFP

*****

I went to the Urgent Care last week because I thought I was going to die. Or, at the very least, hack up a lung. Actually, I had been having a severe case of allergies since Mid-March and the week before I went to the Urgent Care my symptoms had become asthmatic.

I should note that I’ve never had asthma in my life. My son was diagnosed with Reactive Airway Disease when he was one and a half. Which is a really super-duper nice way for him to be diagnosed with asthma without actually being diagnosed with asthma and having that become an excluded medical condition with insurance in the future. So, having seen my son deal with his symptoms and subsequent care for it, I knew I was right with my self-diagnosis.

I ended up using his inhaler and nebulizer until the night before my Urgent Care visit. The meds were no longer working, and I could not breathe without coughing (which leads to more not-breathing). After a miserable night I told the Mister, “[wheeze-cough] We musssst [cough-wheeze] goooooo to [wheeze-wheeze-wheeze] the Urgent Caaaaaaaaaaaaaare [struggle-wheeze-wheeze-cough] right away [sighhhhh-wheeze]. You know when you can’t breathe really well so all your words end up getting drawn out? Sort of like if you might struggling to move something really heavy and big and you just groan out some weird sound? Yeah, that’s how I sounded to Mister.

So he rushes me to Urgent Care and as I walk in he tells me there are face-mask thingies at the counter. Sigh.  I don’t want to look like I’m contagious with some horrible disease, but I put it on because I can’t stop my wheezy-cough thing I got going on. I grab the paperwork to fill out, and while I’m doing that two dudes walk in to be seen as well. I didn’t pay much attention to them until I had a coughing fit while doing the paperwork. The kind of coughing fit that is so hard on you that you actually cough-fart. Yeah, that happened. But I felt so much like crap I didn’t care WHO heard me fart, as long as somebody could help me to breathe. And ass-breathing didn’t count.  Knowwhatimean?

The nurse calls me back, and I get back to the room. I had thought Mister was following me, because I could barely speak without going into some wheezy-cough spasm. By the time I got to the room, I noticed he stayed in the waiting area. Ugh. So, I wheeze-cough-groan-talked to her about what was going on and she got the doctor for me.  While she did that, I went out to the waiting area and told the Mister I needed his speaking services ASAP. The doctor came in and asked me what was going on. Didn’t I just freakin’ tell the nurse who told you?! I start in and Mister, thankfully, stops me and takes over. Conservation of oxygen, you know?! You’d think the doctor would consider that too! He listens, does the usual eyes/mouth/ear inspection and tells me I’m gonna get an xray, steroid shot, and another breathing treatment. So off he goes, and back comes the nurse.

And we FINALLY get to the TMI part. Although the cough-fart was TMI too, because I’d normally NEVER admit that. The nurse comes in with this big ol’ shot and tells me she has to stick me in the butt with it. I get off the table, unzip my shorts, and pull down the left side so she has access to my somewhat voluminous ass. All right, it’s huge, okay? And here’s the ensuing conversation:

Nurse: I need you to move your hand for me.
Me: Oops, sorry!
Nurse: No problem, I just need to find a little corner here.
Brad: I don’t think it’s possible to find a “little” corner there.
Me: [gasp/laugh/wheeze/hack/groan/laugh] You booger!
Nurse: Don’t worry, I’ll smack him for ya!

Then, to make matters worse I tell her, “I remember getting a shot from a male Physician’s Assistant when I was 13. He slapped my ass and gave me the shot and then asked me which hurt worse.  My mother about slapped him across the room.”

Silent pause. The nurse replies, “Well THAT was highly inappropriate.”  Yeah. It totally was. Why did I just tell her that? I blame the oxygen deprivation.

Anyway, all is well now after the lovely meds they gave me. Also, the Mister shared the conversation at the dinner table. My son laughed so hard he fell out of his chair. My two daughters had tears streaming down their faces. I sorta made matters worse when I said, “The nurse said the needle would pinch, but the liquid would burn. Funny thing is, must’ve been my big ass cushion that kept me from feeling the needle.” And, everyone at the table lost it. Again.

Looks like the joke is on me. Literally.

~Christine

*****

Do you have a fun story for T.M.I. Tuesday? Send it to me: princess@themfp.com and you might be featured here next time!

I LOVE dancing and as part of my Team Beachbody Coach training, I started watching the Hip Hop Abs workout program featuring Shaun T. I can’t wait until I can get up off my feet and jam out with Shaun! Until then, I get to live vicariously through YOU!

That’s right, I’m looking for 6-8 people who are sick and tired of being sick and tired. These people want to get fit and HAVE FUN! These people also want personal attention via Facebook, text, and phone calls from a coach, who can help them stay motivated and on track – I GET TO BE YOUR COACH! These people want to be in a support group of other like minded individuals that have similar goals. These people have 30 days to invest in their health and fitness.

Are YOU one of these 6-8 people? Are you ready to commit to health, fitness, and fun? Send me an email letting me know you’re committed to yourself and I’ll get you an application to the 30 Day Dance Challenge Group¹!

~The MFP

¹You must be willing to:

• Participate, DAILY, in a private Facebook group, let by me.
• Respond to text messages send by me.
• Check in with a weekly phone call with me.
• Sign up for your FREE Team Beachbody Account and select me as your coach – Screen Name: InizioFitness or Email Address: princess@themfp.com
• Purchase a “Dance” Challenge Pack by Monday, April 15th. (Dance Challenge packs include: Hip Hop Abs (My top recommendation!), Turbo Jam, Brazil Butt Lift, Body Gospel, or Hip Hop Abs with Rockin’ Body.
• Be ready to start the challenge on Monday, April 29th!
• Drink Shakeology everyday (Unless you have dietary restrictions that don’t allow you to consume Shakeology at this time.)
• Take Before and After photos.
• Fill out an end of Challenge Survey

Don’t wait! Email me for YOUR application TODAY! princess@themfp.com

*Team Beachbody offers a 30 day return policy. There is absolutely no risk for you.

I wasn’t new at this whole being a mother thing, and I think I handled my many roles just fine. I knew that even though my new baby (and the other two kids) needed me to take care of them, it was important to take care of myself too. 

I’d always been pretty good about trimming my Lady Garden into a nice, neat topiary. (I didn’t want to be one of those women at the pool with her Bush busting out of her swimsuit.) So, it was a pretty easy transition for me to go from trimming my Lady Garden’s topiary, to mowing the whole damn Garden down. Eventually I even ‘pulled my Lady Garden out by the roots.’ (I warned you, today is T.M.I. Tuesday, right?)

Here I was, happily married, raising three kids (two 1st graders and a baby), losing my baby weight, keeping my Lady Garden smooth, and feeling just fine.

Until I got the postcard in the mail, reminding me that it was time for my yearly check up with my ObGyn. All of a sudden I wasn’t this self-assured mom of three who proudly, but privately, ‘pulled her Lady Garden out by the roots.’

NOW? I was the freaking-out mom of three, who didn’t want the doctor (that delivered a baby out of her vagina) to see her smooth, weed free, Lady Garden. Really, I was in quite the panic. It’s not like I could just dump some Miracle Grow on my Lady Garden, and in a couple weeks pretend I never ‘pulled it out by the roots’. I’d have to see my doctor without a Lady Garden.

The day of the appointment, I had completely worked myself up. The nurse called my name and I went to the bathroom to give them a sample and re-clean my lady parts. (You all clean multiple times too, right?!?!)

When I got into my room, the nurse let me know that I could fully undress this time. I took my clothes off and carefully hid my panties and my bra inside my t-shirt, which I folded neatly and placed on top of my jeans. I mean, I wouldn’t want my doctor to see my panties and my bra. It’s not like she’s going to see me WITH MY LADY GARDEN COMPLETELY RIPPED OUT, AND MY FEET UP IN STIRRUPS, AS SHE LOOKS STRAIGHT INTO MY PRIVATE PARTS, RIGHT?!?!?

*le sigh*

I waited patiently for my doctor and continued to remind myself that “she’s seen it all” and that my smooth Lady Parts weren’t that big of a deal to her. I even reminded myself of the story of the woman who accidentally ‘glitterfied’ her privates before an ObGyn appointment. At least I didn’t do that.

My doctor came in. I laid down. She removed my paper gown and said, “Nice.”

OMG…My doctor just looked at my ripped out Lady Garden and said, “Nice.” What kind of doctor is she? I mean, I do a good job keeping it fresh down there, but come on! What the hell?!?!? I continued to work myself up in a panic and I couldn’t breath. OMG….I’m just as bad as the woman that glitterfied herself!

And then she said, “Your c-section scar healed up very nicely.”

Oh, she wasn’t talking about how I chose to style my Lady Garden at all.

She was talking about how my c-section scar was looking.

She was talking about something totally doctorly.

I finally exhaled, then sighed with a bit of relief. Happily, I threw my feet in those cold stirrups and we finished the rest of the appointment.

~The MFP

Do YOU have a T.M.I. story that will make us laugh? Email it to me and YOUR story might be featured on T.M.I. Tuesday! princess@themfp.com

I don’t know about you, but when I get sick my brain doesn’t really work.

All my thoughts and ideas just swirl around and around at an incredibly fast pace – they make no sense either. I mean, like they swirl around even faster than usual and make less sense than normal.

So, I think I’ll spend the rest of the day on Pineterst, pinning things to my favorite boards: Hair I Love, Favorite Places and Spaces, I Should Wear This, and YUM.

Oh wait. I have an idea and I think I can actually get it to stick long enough to type it out!

I have a board with not much pinned to it yet¹. It’s called “Blog Posts I Love“. How about if some of you Bloggers out there post a link in the comments with one or two of your favorite posts? If I really like them, I’ll pin a picture from the post to that board.

This sounds like a perfect sick day…

~The MFP

¹It’s not that I don’t have a ton of Bloggers (and certain posts they’ve written) as my faves. It’s just that I haven’t put much effort into that Pinterest board. And I have a cold, so I’m feeling lazy.

*****

Hello BFF’s!

I am so excited to be co-hosting with The Mother Freakin’ Princess! Not only do I get to work with The MFP, I get to share my new favorite book, too! You can even enter to win our giveaway for a SIGNED COPY of Dark Star, by Bethany Frenette.

I recently read Dark Star, and fell in love. I’m a huge fan of fantasy fiction…vampires, shape-shifters, dragons, magic, the supernatural stuff… But I’ve been looking for something new and fun, and an easy read. When my friend’s mom lent me a copy of Dark Star, I was giddy to discover that I may have just found my new favorite author.

Purchase Dark Star on Amazon!

Dark Star is labeled as a Young Adult book, but unlike other books and series I’ve read from that genre, I found that it held my interest without being too full of teeny-bopper angst. I found myself actually laughing out loud at some of the dialogue. I’m a pretty big smart aleck, so Audrey’s wit just killed me.

Part of what I thought was cool about this book was the fact that it takes place in Minneapolis. As a lifelong Minnesota resident, it was fun to read about the characters being in places I’ve heard of and been to. The author grew up in Minnesota, so I think that’s why she chose the Twin Cities (Minneapolis and St. Paul) as the setting.

To be honest, my favorite character was NOT the main character (although I loved Audrey). I adored Gideon, Audrey’s best friend and confidante. Their easy banter and open acceptance of one another reminds me of MY best friend and me.

Here’s a look into the story…

Audrey Whitticomb has nothing to fear. Her mother is the superhero Morning Star, the most deadly crime-fighter in the Twin Cities, so it’s hard for Audrey not to feel safe. That is, until she’s lured into the sweet night air by something human and not human—something with talons and teeth, and a wide, scarlet smile.

Now Audrey knows the truth: her mom doesn’t fight crime at night. She fights Harrowers—livid, merciless beings who were trapped Beneath eons ago. Yet some have managed to escape. And they want Audrey dead, just because of who she is: one of the Kin.

To survive, Audrey will need to sharpen the powers she has always had. When she gets close to someone, dark corners of the person’s memories become her own, and she sometimes even glimpses the future. If Audrey could only get close to Patrick Tigue, a powerful Harrower masquerading as human, she could use her Knowing to discover the Harrowers’ next move. But Leon, her mother’s bossy, infuriatingly attractive sidekick, has other ideas. Lately, he won’t let Audrey out of his sight.

When an unthinkable betrayal puts Minneapolis in terrible danger, Audrey discovers a wild, untamed power within herself. It may be the key to saving her herself, her family, and her city. Or it may be the force that destroys everything—and everyone—she loves.

—

Author Bethany Frenette

I had a chance to do a short Q & A with the author for this post, and this is what she had to say:

I understand that you started writing at a very young age. What was your first piece?

Bethany:  I’ve been writing as long as I can remember — my mom still has this tiny “book” I made when I was about four, called The Cat Book — and I spent most of my childhood making up stories, usually about animals.  The first project of any length that I finished, however, was a fantasy novel I wrote when I was thirteen.  It was fabulously titled “Novel.”  I still have a copy of it on my computer.  It’s 96,000 words, which is kind of scary, now that I think about it.

Audrey’s relationship with her mother seems to be an integral part of this story. How did your own family influence your writing, and the creation of these characters?

Bethany:  I’m very close with my own mother, so I’m certain that had some effect on the novel — I think it was just natural for me to write a close mother/daughter relationship.  Audrey is an only child, however, which is very different from my own family.  Sometimes I feel sorry for her, since she doesn’t have sisters like I do!  (I think Gideon’s family is actually much closer to my own — some of his stories were inspired by my own childhood.)

Most importantly, if you woke up with a superpower of your own, what would you want it to be?

Bethany:  I usually answer “flying” to this question — but as we are currently in the middle of another freezing Minnesota winter, I think at the moment I’d have to go with teleportation.  I’d really love to be able to get around the Cities and visit my family without -20F windchills!

—

If you want to read an excerpt from the book, you can find it on her site: www.bethanyfrenette.com. You can also find Bethany on Twitter and here’s a link to Bethany’s Facebook Fan Club

Social Media Consultant;
Kim Eastin

Kim is a Social Media Consultant and child care provider. When she’s not chasing little ones, procrastinating laundry, or trying to find time to pee by herself, she writes as The Not So Perfect Mom. She is also a chronic Facebooker and is a delinquent Tweeter.

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I had expectations of being able to start working out by now. If you remember, I wanted to do a ‘modified’ P90X Challenge. I tried the workouts a few times and I found out that I’m just not far enough along in my recovery for it yet.

<I was going to insert a small clip of me trying one of the P90X routines here, but no one really wants to see a fat girl workout. Plus, I totally broke down and cried while I was taping my workout. YUCK!>

I had to scale way back and that doesn’t make me happy. Being one of those people who go big or do nothing, I’m not used to “get on the stationary bike for ten minutes” a day.

I don’t want to struggle to get my shoes on, crutch over to the bike, heave myself onto the bike, and set up a timer for *just* ten minutes. If I’m going to go through all that trouble, I’d like to make it count. Go big or go home, right? And are those ten, little, minutes really going to make a difference? Sometimes I don’t feel like it will.

Today, BFF, Ursula, posted this amazing video of two brothers who are competing together. Connor races with his brother, Cayden, who has cerebral palsy.

Now all I can think of is, “Sure, it’s a pain in the ass for me to get up on that bike and ride for ten minutes, but at least I can pedal. I might not be able to walk yet, and I sure as hell can’t ride an actual bike, but I CAN USE THE TOOLS AVAILABLE TO ME TO HELP ME MOVE.”

I can do that.

For myself and for other people out there like Cayden. I can get up, put my shoes on, use my crutches to get to my bike, heave myself on that fucking bike, and pedal.

I can pedal. I can pedal for ten¹ minutes.

How about you? Can YOU move for 10 minutes today? I’m asking you to take a 10 minute walk (or even a jog/run) for me. I can’t do it, yet. Will you do it ‘for’ me?

~The MFP

¹Well, today I actually pedaled for fifteen minutes. I’m such an over-achiever.

I felt the way that I would need to modify the workouts wouldn’t get me to where I want to be. I’m sure there are people out there who get P90X to work for them when they’re recovering from injuries, or surgery, like myself, but it just wasn’t happening for me.

I felt like a loser. I mean all my friends and internet BFFs are wondering how it’s going. Um…it’s not.

I am not *currently* doing P90X.

There, I said it out loud.

I feel better now. I can take a deep breath and move on.

That’s right, I’m moving on. If you know much about me, you know that I’m not a quitter. I keep on trying. They say I can’t run, guess what? I kept trying and eventually I ran. Well, I’m not quitting my weight loss journey either.

I’m back at it. I’ve been eating whole foods – mostly from Tier 1 & 2 of Michi’s Ladder¹ and I’ve looked over the Slim in 6 workout DVDs. Guess what? THAT is a workout system that I can modify with where I’m at RIGHT NOW.

So wish me good luck, because Slim in 6² starts tomorrow!

~The MFP

¹This is one of the things that I really like about Team Beachbody. They don’t hide their formula to lose weight. You can get it for FREE. Guess what? Would you like a FREE coach to help you with your goals? I DO THAT!!!! Just sign up for your free Team Beachbody account and list me as your coach. You can find me by: Screen name: InizioFitness or Email: princess@themfp.com

²I’m even Co-Coaching a Shakeology Challenge group that starts April 1st. Send me an email if you’re interested in learning more: princess@themfp.com

I tried to remember where the Apple store was by memory, but I hardly go to M.O.A. I ended up on the West side, third floor. I located a directory and looked up the Apple store. *sigh* The Apple store is E300. It’s on the EAST side of the Mall of America and I’m on the West side.

Damn it. I parked on the wrong side.

I took an elevator down to the first floor so I could hobble my way through Nickelodeon Universe, taking a “shortcut” to the East side. When I finally got to the East side, I took an elevator to the third floor. I scanned around, looking for the Apple store. I couldn’t see it, so I hobbled to another directory.

Um…

The store E300 isn’t the Apple store. It’s the AT&T store. OMGosh…I walked all the way across the Mall for nothing. The Apple store is actually S132. I wanted to cry, but instead I took an elevator down to level one and hobbled over to where the Apple store is actually located.

I never really know what to do when I go to the Apple store, so I just kinda wondered around until I caught one of the employee’s eye. I let them know that I had a phone that was broken and he sent me to some guy that was “checking people in” on an iPad.

iPad Guy: Hello. Do you have an appointment?

Me: Um. No? [I need an appointment? What the hell?¹]

iPad Guy: Okay, what seems to be the problem?

Me: Well, my iPhone isn’t taking a charge.

iPad Guy: Our service team is in a meeting right now. You said that you don’t have an appointment?

Me: Right. My iPhone isn’t working.

iPad Guy: We recommend calling ahead and getting an appointment.

Me: Um. Okay, but my iPhone isn’t working.

iPad Guy: OH, YOU’RE THE MOTHER FREAKIN’ PRINCESS?!?!? WE CAN GET YOU IN A.S.A.P.! I’M SO SORRY ABOUT THE WAIT. WOULD YOU LIKE A GLASS OF WINE OR A FREE iPAD WHILE YOU WAIT? It’s almost 3:30 and it looks like we can get you in around 4:00. Did you want that appointment? 

ME: Sure.

iPad Guy: Okay, you can just go ahead and shop until your appointment.

Wine. And FREE iPads. That’s what this place needs.

Me: Um. No. I’ll just sit right here. [I pulled myself up to the Genius Bar. They're not offering wine or free iPads. ]

I waited for what felt like forever and since I didn’t have my iPhone to keep me occupied, I had to people watch. The gal on the left of me was getting ready for a big presentation. She had it all ready and was getting help, from one of the Geniuses, on the final touches. She ended up buying a remote for her Mac. I sat there and daydreamed about doing a presentation with *my* Mac – including using a remote. How cool would that be?!?!

Another Genius was helping the guy to the right of me install a new hard drive. It was taking them for-ev-er, but at least while it was installing I got to look over and take a peek at his computer screen. He was telling the Genius that someone in the store “knew” him. That made me even more interested in spying on Mr. Celebrity’s computer – not for passwords or anything, I’m not criminal! A bit later Mr. Celebrity asked me if I’d watch his stuff for him.

Me: SURE, I’D LOVE TO CHECK OUT YOUR FACEBOOK ACCOUNT AND HASHTAG YOU ON TWITTER! Oh, sure. That’s fine.

When Mr. Celebrity was in the bathroom, and I was diligently watching his stuff, a mom and two daughters came up to the Genius Bar. There weren’t enough stools open for them, so I moved Mr. Celebrity’s jacket and bag off a stool and slid his computer over closer to me. The mom and daughters were very thankful.

Mr. Celebrity came out of the bathroom and I awkwardly told him why I moved his stuff. He mumbled something like, “It’s closer to you.” I ignored him and waited patiently for my Genius to get out of his meeting.

My Genius finally came out and started to help me. *whew* It was getting weird sitting there without my iPhone or anything else to keep me connected to other people.

As my Genius was getting a new phone ready for me, I happened to glance at Mr. Celebrity’s computer screen and saw his Facebook page: BFFs, go check him out and say, “HOLLA from The MFP!” (Also, maybe let him know I’m not really a creepy stalker, but just a fun princess who loves glitter, unicorns, wine, vodka, YOU, and my husband.)

Oh, and here’s his Twitter account if you Tweet: Orny Adams

There’s a lesson here….

I’m not exactly sure what it is.

~The MFP

¹At this point of my blog, my sissy’s probably laughing at me, or rolling her eyes, or thinking something like, “What the hell? This is 2013. You need an appointment for EVERYTHING!” Um…right. I know that.

I had the whole “Mirror, Mirror on the Wall” post where I came to grips with the fact that *I* love having pink hair, not because it makes me different, but because it makes me happy.

Then I posted about how, I feel like, I’m pretty much a selfish asshole, because it’s hard for me to put myself, and my family, before others.

Well, the other week we got one of those ‘on top of the counter utensil caddies’ because apparently I have an weird crazy insane OCD pretty much normal obsession with kitchen utensils and I don’t have enough drawers in my tiny kitchen to keep them all in.

The kids figured this new caddy was a dumping ground for every utensil I own.

Um…no. I don’t have enough drawer space for my utensils, you certainly can’t fit them all in a tiny ‘on the countertop caddy’, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?!?!?!

I had to teach the kids which untensils would go in the caddy and which one would go in the drawer:

#1. If the utensil is so small that it will not “peek” over the edge of the caddy, it automatically goes in the drawer.

#2. If we hardly ever use it, keep it in the drawer. Example; potato masher

#3. Don’t put the UGLY utensils in the “on top of the counter utensil caddy”, because if we have company, our guest wouldn’t want to look at those ugly utensils.

WAIT, WHAT?!?!?

Um….that isn’t really true.

It’s not that my guests won’t want to see semi-ugly utensils in my “on top the counter utensil caddy”, it’s that I DON’T WANT TO SEE MY UGLY UTENSILS.

ME!

Wow….

I guess it’s not all about ‘guests’ and ‘other people’, it’s about me.

My life is about me.

Okay…

~The MFP

Last week, I stumbled upon the book Madly in Love with Me. I’ve only read a couple pages, but have you ever felt like a book (or something else) crossed your path, at just the most *perfect* time? Yeah…I’ll be starting a book club and this book is the first on the list. Want to be in my book club? Email me: princess@themfp.com