Reflections of a Nerdy Momma

Sensitive Me

2011-08-26T12:30:00.000-05:00

There is something that I need to get off my chest, and its huge! Most of my closest friends probably know this about me, but they probably don't understand it very well...

So, my huge confession is that I am a highly sensitive person. I am introverted, deep, and emotional! I worry a lot and often over-analyze everything. I keep to myself most of the time, and when I am out and about, I am overwhelmed by large crowds, chaos, and tons of noise. I won't act crazy...ever, and even as a child, I was never one to have gobs of energy! Oh, and probably the hardest thing for me, is that I am easily hurt. When I was younger, I would cry too much...it was awful!

I have hated this part of myself for most of my life, until recently. I have really started to appreciate the beauty of my sensitivity. I can feel a depth of emotion that most people probably can't fathom, and I can have a massive burden for things because God has placed something on my heart! For instance, right now, I have a burden for orphans and the hurting. I am not sure how to act on it, but it has been festering in my heart for a few years now!

It has been difficult growing up this way. It still is tough, because when I am hurt, I am not completely sure how to let it go. God is teaching me, slowly, to give over my hurts to Him. He is also teaching me the intense beauty that I possess (something that I have always struggled with is my sense of self-worth).

I want to teach the world about people like me...that way maybe we can be fully appreciated for who we are. Like a delicate flower, hidden in a garden, truly beautiful but often overlooked.

There will be more to come, as I can get my thoughts written out. So, stick with me, and maybe you will understand me a bit better!

How I am Surviving this Summer...

2011-08-03T21:59:00.000-05:00

The temps here in OKC have been awful. We have had over 40 straight days of weather in the 100's! It's been a long, hot summer already, with more to come...

To top it all off, I am sporting a pregnant belly and chasing after a 19-month-old! She's a really good baby, but still, she's a toddler who likes to get into stuff!

So, here is how I am surviving the hottest summer I have ever experienced:
*I go out only in the mornings, when it is cooler.
*Fans! We bought an oscillating fan for our living room, and it really helps when the house only cools down to 80!
*Lots of liquids. Drinking lots of water helps (I also drink soda too...oops).
*Shorts and dresses only. There is no way you are going to find me wearing jeans...

So, now, tell me. How are you staying cool?

Snowmageddon 2011

2011-06-23T20:43:00.000-05:00

So, at the end of January, OKC had one of the worst snow storms in years. It was awful, in that it shut down the city for almost a week! It snowed on Monday night, and I don't even remember how much we got, but it was bad. The worst part about the storm is that in Oklahoma, they do not clear off the roads...at all! The state has hardly any snow plows, so the best hope to get out is to pray for the snow to melt and to drive in the tracks of other drivers who paved the way before you.

Jim Beckel/newsok.com

Mike became sick that week, so I had to care for a sickling and run to the store a couple days after the snowstorm to get him some soup and crackers. It was a small adventure!

Why mention the snowstorm several months after it happened? Well, since it has been a while since I posted anything, I thought I would say the one ironic result! The night the storm hit, I jokingly mentioned on facebook how many snowstorm babies there were going to be, and that we might have one of them. About a week later, I started feeling sick and wondering if I was pregnant. The next day, I took a pregnancy test and behold, it was positive! At the 8-week ultrasound, this baby measured exactly as though it were conceived during that very snowstorm! So, the irony is that while we weren't trying or anything, but this little one is a snowstorm baby indeed! Maybe we should give her a snowy name! Ha! Yeah right!

Its Been a While...

2011-06-21T22:45:00.001-05:00

Well, its now the later half of June, and it has been four months since I have posted anything! Time definitely flies! My baby girl is now 18 months. She's walking, trying to figure things out, dancing, running away from mommy, and being insanely cute! She carries her lovey, Pinkie, everywhere, and in the pic below, she put the shoe on by herself! I'm impressed, as its amazing to see her growing and learning everyday!

As for me, I am currently 22 weeks pregnant with my second baby GIRL! Her nickname is currently Daleberta (after my dear dad...it was his idea), and she is due October 24th. We currently have a name picked out (for now), but we're not saying what it is just yet.

We are so thrilled to have two girls in less than two years apart. I seriously wonder what this baby will look like and what her personality will be. I'm just trying to remember that she will be completely different from her big sister.

I can't be more thrilled!

Serving...its Hard Work!

2011-02-08T14:38:00.000-06:00

Right now as I type this blog entry, I am siting in a language lab while my little girl plays on the floor with her blocks. It takes a twenty minute drive to get down here and I have to pack what feels like the entire house so that I can take good care of Lily while here. Once I get to the language lab, I can sigh a huge sigh of relief since I made it! Hopefully, Lily will cooperate and play well, or else it makes the two hour block very tiring!

My story of how I got here is a good one:
It all began when I heard about an organization called The Spero Project. They have four different divisions, and one of them is working with the International Refugee Community here in OKC. Some people from our church did a local mission day last April, and we did some various projects around the apartment complex where this community lives. Basically, I had a friend watch Lily and I helped to paint the laundry room. When they were discussing what the Spero Project does, something in my heart stirred. "This is what I want to do!" I told myself.

A couple of months later, I found myself mentoring this family that had just moved here, attempting to teach them English. The mentorship was difficul,t but rewarding, but that family has now since moved to another area of Oklahoma. Now, I work in the language lab and help the kiddos with their homework. I volunteer down here on Monday and Tuesday afternoons for a couple hours. Yesterday afternoon was amazing, and I am only looking forward to what happens today!

Serving is so tough! I have to figure out ways to make it easier on Lily so that I can serve here, and when she is fussy, it drains me emotionally! There is no bathroom in the lab, so I have to ask one of the kind ladies who live here if I can use the restroom in their apartment (this is a bit ackward). There are so many things about this volunteer job that make it difficult... but I am building relationships with some of the refugees that live here and am just so blessed!

I could stay at home all day and watch The Doctors or Oprah, or I could come down here! I choose to come down here and serve...even in this small capacity!

My Fanny is Smaller!

2010-11-21T00:43:00.000-06:00

My fanny went from being parked in a size 16 to a now size 8! Its tight, but I can make it!

Huey Yoong/flickr

I'm not done. I'm still going on my weight loss journey. The best part is that I am smaller than I have been in years! I'm now down about 30 pounds since I started in late March. I'm now around 158, whereas I was around 160 when I got married and the smallest I have been is 164 since then. The smallest clothing-wise that I have been is about a size 12.

It feels great to have all that weight off. Its also hard to realize that I have taken so much off! I was 188-9 when I started, which includes baby weight and all. Now, I'm just trying to lose some of the belly fat, because I still have a ton! Even after thirty lbs of fat, I still have plenty to spare.

How have I done it? Weight watchers! I am breastfeeding, so that helps a little, but not as much as you might think. Its about eating less and exercising more. Eating much, much less (although I still eat plenty of sugar - just a smaller amount). And I feel amazing! I hope to post some recipes to help others along their journey.

Now, I have discovered myfitnesspal.com, and it is so cool! I am hoping that it is a really useful tool, as well! I would like to ditch Weight Watchers and start using this website.

The most important thing for myself to remember is that weight loss is a marathon, not a spring. It will take a long time, but that is the way to keep the weight off!

Why I Value my Husband

2010-11-18T13:36:00.000-06:00

I'm pretty angry right now. Its because there are people in this world who actually dare to talk rudely to my husband. They are people who are close, or at least think they are close, yet they think that they have the right to actually talk rudely to him. They pretty much treat him like crap. And I don't understand why.

My husband never says a harsh word to anyone and never does anything to hurt someone intentionally. There are times when, yes, he has hurt my feelings, but he is human. If I talk to him rationally, he will do whatever it takes to make it right. He hates to see someone hurt. Especially because of what he has done. And he hardly ever hurts me, the person closest to him.

As a father, he is amazing! He is awesome with Lily. Just the best daddy that I could ask for, for my daughter.

Loren King Photography

Michael is kind and generous. He is shy, but when you get to know him, he will surprise you at how much he can open up. He is hilarious and even goofy - at least to Lily, myself, and his mom - the people who know his best. Mike is insanely smart. Furthermore, he does get angry, but he rarely acts upon it. Mike is controlled and driven. He is passionate. He is loving and absolutely devoted to those he loves. Michael is faithful to God. Lastly, he is very hot! But I can only say that since he is my man!

I know from personal experience how much of a treasure he is, and it upsets me greatly when people treat him badly. I just want to scream, "Don't you know what you've got here? Why do you treat him this way? He has done nothing to deserve this!"

And even more so, it makes me appreciate and love my husband even more. I know what I have, and I want to respect him even greater because he is such an amazing person.

So, Mike, I value you greatly! I love you so much, and I hope you realize how much you mean to me and Lily. Where would we be without you? Lost! You are amazing, and I thank you for being such a great Christ follower, husband, daddy, lover, engineer, and so many other things!

Book Review, Captivated by Grace

2010-11-14T22:55:00.000-06:00

I recently finished Captivated by Grace, by Dr. David Jeremiah, which was given to me by the publisher to review. Great book! When first seeing the cover, it looks less than appealing (or at least to me). But it turns out to be exactly what I needed for my current faith walk, as it was in fact, very interesting.

This book takes you through the journey of John Newton and explains in detail the meaning behind the lyrics of his incredible song, Amazing Grace. John Newton was a slave trader, yet in spite of his terrible sin, he experienced the "captivating grace of God". We walk through John Newton's life and understand what he went through to inspire him write those amazing lyrics.

Through this book, I have learned what grace truly means. It means that I am forgiven, no matter how horrible my sins have been. It means that I am always forgiven and how I can live my life in the future, free of any guilt. While reading these pages, I have been reminded for the umpteenth time that I am precious to God. Everyone is precious to God. Because of that, I can give grace and love to anyone and everyone.

Growing up in the church, I have always been familiar with the hymn. Now, after reading this book and understanding where they song came from, I have a new appreciation for the popular hymn. I understand the man behind the song, and the God behind the concept of grace.

I highly recommend this book. I am going to pass it to my stepmom next, as she saw it and already claimed dibs on it.

Cultivating a Thankful Heart

2010-10-18T14:42:00.000-05:00

Because of the book that I am currently reading, I feel as though I should start cultivating an attitude of thankfulness. So here goes!

I am thankful for many things, including:

-A husband who treats me like a queen
-A beautiful baby girl who is healthy
-A family who cares so much
-Family that comes to visit quite often
-An amazing church
-A church home from Arkansas, who we miss very badly
-A pastor from that church, Mike McDaniel, who has vision and passion, that I admire
-A beautiful home
-A great small group
-Great friends
-I am privileged to stay home with my baby

And most importantly, I am blessed to have a relationship with Jesus Christ. I am so thankful for all the blessings that He has given me, especially Himself!

What are you thankful for?

God's Beauty...Found in Us!

2010-10-13T16:13:00.000-05:00

Some encouragement for those of you who struggle like I do:

"For You formed my inward parts;
You wove me in my mother's womb.
I will give thanks to You, for I am
fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;
Your eyes have seen my unformed substance;
And in Your book were all written
The days that were ordained for me,
When as yet there was not one of them."
Psalm 129:13-16

panienka/flickr

Out of all God's creation, we are each inherently beautiful. We are all equally valuable and loved by God! From the moment of conception, God has delighted in us.

Take that with you today.

Blogging..what is that?

2010-09-24T11:48:00.000-05:00

I was asked by a friend earlier this week if I have blogged in a while. The answer was "No, I haven't." Its funny how a few months ago I got so excited about blogging, with ideas flowing constantly and was so excited to network and find other blogger's blogs. Then, slowly, the words came slower and slower. I might have an idea and start writing it, but then, I just couldn't get it out. Maybe once or twice a week. Now, here it is on September 24th, and I haven't blogged this entire month. I hardly visit other people's blogs anymore.

I had a realization that I need to be more productive around the house. I am not great at cleaning, but I need to get better at taking care of my home. I am, first and foremost a mom and wife, then a homemaker. Then, we ended up buying a house, so I'm trying to get my home together and just enjoy it. So, productivity means that I have to constantly battle the desire to get on the internet and play on facebook or twitter. Its still a struggle, but I will get there one of these days, bygolly!

I also realized that I need a social life. I'm trying to get together with people more often. Last night, we had some friends over for dinner, and I tried to have another friend over for lunch earlier this week, but they were sick, so they ended up having Lily and me over the following day.

Tanti Ruwani/flickr

Back in June, I started volunteering with a family, who just moved here from Burma, to teach them English. I only go down there once a week, but they are becoming quite good friends - even though we don't speak each other's language. Its been an excruciatingly slow process, but one of these days, I might actually be able to converse with them. I can dream, right...

I've learned so much about myself this summer. My self-worth is founded in God alone. I need to base myself upon who God says I am, not what others say or do. I'm also learning that some people I don't click with as much as others, and that it's okay to not hang out with them as often.

Maybe what I'll do is turn this blog into a more contemplative soundboard. Record some of my thoughts and what is going on in our lives. I am really good at being analytical (hence, the nerd part in "The Momma Nerd"), so that will be a great way to write. That is more of who I am than trying to be some professional blogger. That was my dream in the beginning of this journey, but its just kind of died.

Blogging is a fun hobby, and maybe it will be something more. But, for now, I have so much to do and a life to enjoy outside of the computer. Even facebook has lost most of its appeal to me. And I could spend hours on facebook a day!

And if you have given me a blogging award, please forgive me. I really do appreciate it. I've just lost my oomph that I had in the spring. Maybe I'll get it again someday, but for now, I have a vast life to live. And record on this blog.

Now, I need to workout and get some things done before Lily wakes up. Have a great weekend!

Twenty Eight Years!

2010-08-31T13:40:00.000-05:00

Today, I turn 28. Its kind of crazy to think that I am so old. I'm not really old, but I have seen a few years anyway. Its even weirder to think that I will be 30 in two years (which feels like I will really be an adult then).

So far, its been a little rough. I started out not being able to sleep and then holding a crying, sick baby as she fell asleep on me at midnight. I have to take her to the doctor today, since I think she has an ear infection. Its so hard to watch her not feel well (she's pretty happy for the most part, but yesterday, she was really fussy). I had a good time at my Tuesday morning women's life group, and then I went to grab some lunch at Chick-fil-A. It took forever to make it through traffic! So frustrating!

And I think that is one of two things that I can take away so far from my birthday. First of all, it is just an ordinary day, just more revolving a little more around myself! I got a beautiful bouquet of flowers from Mike and Season Five of Everybody Loves Raymond from Lily. Tonight, we are going out on a date. I realized as I was driving that I struggle much with entitlement, thinking that the world owes me something. I am sure we all struggle with this to some extent. Why can't they just clear out the roads for me on this day, after all - it is my birthday! I'm just kidding! But seriously, I will be the first to say that I struggle with self-centeredness. Its an epidemic, and I'm going to fight it in my own heart!

Second thing to take away: I am REALLY loved. So many people have wished me happy birthday! My husband treats me like a queen and I know that my baby just loves me like crazy, even though she can't say it in words. Most importantly, God saw fit to bring me into this world. Why me? He could have brought anybody, but He chose to bring me, so I know that He loves me more than I can imagine! Now, I just need to remember this truth!

God is truly good. My birthday has new meaning, since I know what it takes to give birth. I know how hard it is to carry and give life

Mom, thanks for giving birth to me! I really appreciate it!

And here's to many more birthdays to come!

Feeling Left Out

2010-08-28T22:55:00.000-05:00

I am a very sensitive person. All it takes is someone saying that they got together with fellow friends to make me doubt myself. I wasn't invited! Its silly and self-centered, I know, but I'm not a very secure person. Never really have been.

Tommy Wong/Tom@HK/Flickr

I am blessed with tons of friends, and God has shown me how amazing that each of them are. I get together with a friend at least once a week for lunch or to hang out, and Mike and I are trying to be more social by having people over to our house more often. The only problem is that so far, we only have people to our house only about once a month on average. We are just so busy and content with our little family that we don't think to invite others over. I'm sure that others are exactly the same way. And most of our friends have 2-3 kids and are just plain busy! I just can't seem to get that! Even though my mind understands it, my soul just doesn't get it. I've always struggled in this way...

Often, not being included forces me back to the truth found in Psalm 139: 13-15:
"For you formed my inward parts;
You wove me in my mother's womb;
I will give thanks to You,
for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth."

I am God's beautiful creation! It has nothing to do with what people think or say or do. Whether I am invited to dinner, ever! This truth is something that I need to repeat to myself over and over until I get it into the deepest part of my soul. Its so difficult, this struggle that I have, but I know that I am not alone.

I truly do struggle with my self-worth. I know it needs to be based upon the solid truth of God's handywork, but its so hard. Back and forth I wrestle with myself, but I know that He is truly my Father, my Daddy. I can run to him for comfort.

I just need to learn to trust that comfort and stay there, permanently.

Do you ever feel hurt when left out?

The Day I Met my Man

2010-08-20T17:15:00.009-05:00

So, ten years ago, my life forever changed. I was reminded by the man who wrote about it in a blog entry. I exclusively started dating him nine years ago. I became his wife six years ago, and I just had his baby eight months and five days ago.

I was seventeen, about to turn eighteen, and I was at a male-dominated college. I was surrounded by boys, and having been boy-deprived in high school, I was still in shock over it. I loved the attention I was getting. Mike introduced himself to me, and I really didn't think much about him for another three or four months. I was too busy looking at all the other boys.

Still, he did eventually get my attention, and the rest is history! What a decade it has been...

The House!

2010-08-14T14:19:00.000-05:00

Let me introduce you to our new house! We close on September 9, if all goes according to plan. Sorry the pictures are a little dark.

Our new house is 1715 sq. ft. and has a ton of windows. It is such a beautiful home, and I am so grateful for it! God is so good! We are absolutely blessed. Once we are moved in, we plan on entertaining quite often.

I took the Plunge! I joined Weight Watchers!

2010-08-09T09:51:00.000-05:00

I did it! I am fed up with attempting to lose weight and not actually doing it. I am fed up with my sugar addiction and not being able to control myself. So, I decided to sign up for Weight Watchers online. I paid for three months worth, and so for an early birthday gift to myself, I am going to give myself the gift of weight loss. I know that this plan works if you follow it, so that is exactly what I am going to do.

Day one was yesterday, which was tough. I must admit that I was really hungry throughout the afternoon, but then, I ate pretty badly in the morning and I was anticipating cake at Life Group in the evening, so I was trying to save some points for that. That meant that I ate a sandwich and a ton of veggies for lunch... not very filling. Nonetheless, I stayed within my points range and didn't go into flex points. It makes me feel so good to know that I did eat well for a day. I didn't eat too much, and I still enjoyed a bagel in the morning and the cake in the evening.

This morning, I had a bowl of Raisin Bran with milk, which amounted to only about 15% of my points, and I felt nice and full afterwards. I think the key is to eat a ton of fiber and less calories. I used to eat Toaster Strudels in the morning, which are way too bad for me, so this was a much healthier way to start the day.

I'm gonna get there, and I will be healthy. I am going to make the lifestyle change, and I know that my family will follow suit. Poor Mike has to eat what I eat, so he automatically will follow in my footsteps. The thing that I am excited about is that there are a ton of recipes at my disposal now, I am hoping to make healthier dishes that are tastier than what I was doing before. Maybe it will make me a better cook, too!

As Dave Ramsey always says, I am going to change my family tree!

What changes are you going to make to reach your goals?

Our Landlord Gave us the Boot, so What Next?

2010-08-05T14:15:00.000-05:00

It all started when Mike got the call about a job interview last July in a city called Oklahoma City. I was not excited. We had just put down beautiful flooring in our home and I was six months pregnant. We had a great church and I did not want to leave Northwest Arkansas.

Little by little, things fell into place and we felt God leading us to move. I started to get excited about moving and the new adventures that we would have in OKC. I found a new OB right away, and I knew that things would be okay.

We listed the house and it sold right away. We packed up and moved into a rental house, expecting to buy in a couple of years. Little did we know that interest rates were going to stay so low and that we would save for a house much quicker than we thought.

So, here we are, and we decided that it is time to buy a house, or to at least look. So, we talked to our friend who is a realtor and got preapproved for a mortgage. We started looking online and even had our list of homes that we wanted to look at. We even set up an appointment with our realtor to start looking.

Tony the Misfit/flickr

Well, then I got a call from the landlord last Friday, wanting to renew our lease for another year. He didn't want to do month-to-month, so he asked us to leave at the end of our lease (in September). I was hoping to have more time, but in reality, we only have the next 2-3 months before we have to move out.

So, here we are, and we are down to three homes to pick from. Which one will we choose? Stay tuned...

Fellow Moms, I'm Watching You

2010-07-24T23:41:00.000-05:00

This is to all those moms who struggle and have no idea what we are doing. I am a brand new mom of an infant, and I have never dealt with screaming toddlers or a super fussy baby, for that matter. I haven't even dealt with a teething baby.

Anyways...

Play group was the other morning. There were like a million kids there. Or so it seemed. Lily is so quiet that I am not used to so many kids. (One thing I learned last week when we had play group at my house is that I am not cut out for play group with eight kids if I am not equipped with toys or am ready to entertain them. Kids don't entertain themselves, and parents don't bring things for their kids to play with.) Nevertheless, play group this week was fun- even with so many midgets running around!

I must say that I learned a very valuable lesson that morning. I watched as a young mother struggled with her willful toddler. This little girl screamed nonstop, resisting her mom's corrections. I watched as her mother was struggling and to the point of tears. Not that she was doing anything wrong - she just was frustrated. Some fellow moms were giving her advice, and all I could do was sympathize. I will be there too soon enough with my own little one.

mdanys/flickr

I learned that there are multiple ways to deal with our children. They are all different, and not everything works all the time on the same kiddo. Every mom is learning and really, no one has any idea what to do! I think that I might want to be strict on discipline, but that doesn't mean that I actually will be strict. In fact, I have no idea what I will do. And I will be learning from other moms as my little Lily gets older. I will someday have the screaming child, and I, too, will be at my wits end, not sure where to turn.

And my friend's will be there to guide me and help me out. Fellow moms will be great role models. I hope that they will give me sound, Biblical wisdom that comes from their own experience. And I am sure that I will soak in every word of advice that they have for me. At the same time, I will watch every thing that my friends do with their kids and ask them, just to learn from them.

And watch them, I will! Because I am a first time mom, and I have a lot to learn...

The Selfishness of Staying Home

2010-07-22T08:00:00.002-05:00

Something new to chew on. Not many people have thought this about stay-at-home moms.

Some of us stay home with our little ones because we are very selfish! I want my husband to work and earn all the money while I stay home and look at my baby all day. Really, that is the reason why I stay home! I can't let somebody else watch her while I work a job that I don't like and commute an insane distance just to gain a little bit of extra income a month. I just can't give her up like that. I have to spend every minute with her that I can.

Its horrible, I know! Miss Lily is so adorable, and I'm not bragging (this awesome photo was taken by my cousin at Susie Desha Photography - great pic!)

So, I HAVE to stay home with this little one. When you have these big blue eyes starring at you everyday, you wouldn't want to leave her either!

Makin' my Own Baby Food!

2010-07-20T14:41:00.002-05:00

In the spirit of frugality and housewifery, I have recently started making my kiddo's baby food. It's quite a bit of fun and much cheaper than the store-bought stuff.

I first started out with store bought baby food, so that I could get her used to baby food in the first place. Gerber's First Foods is very liquidy, with no texture whatsoever. It was slow going at first, as she didn't really know what I was stuffing in her mouth. Eventually, she did get the hang of it, but it took forever to go through the same jar of sweet potatoes. It took me a while to learn how to feed her properly, this being my first baby and all.

So far, I've made carrots, sweet potatoes, and apples. I baked the carrots in the oven in oil until tender and then pureed them with water in my food processor (it was part of a blender than my stepmom gave me for my birthday a couple years ago). I boiled the apples in a couple inches of water until tender and then liquefied them in the same way. With the sweet potatoes, I baked one potato in the oven until it was done (it was a huge potato that took a couple hours to bake). Then, I mixed it with an electric mixer, similar to making mashed potatoes (except with no milk or butter). I use lots and lots of water. I'm not sure how much is yielded but even a few carrots can yield a ton of baby food. Lily only eats baby food about once a day, and she eats a couple ounces at a time, depending upon her mood, so I put some into plastic containers in the fridge for Miss Lily to eat and some I freeze in ice cube trays. Once frozen, I take them out and place them in freezer bags, ready for the time when baby is ready to eat them.

A good resource is wholesomebabyfood.com. They have so much information that helped me to get started!

I will end the post by showing what the Cuteness looks like when she is done eating:

Ouch! Self and World, I am Sorry!

2010-07-15T22:54:00.000-05:00

With my last post, I was rather harsh. To myself, mainly. I reread it and went, ouch!

So, let me apologize and regroup a bit. First of all, God created every single person as an amazing creation! He handmade each one of us and signed us with His autograph. We are each different and beautiful! And that includes myself.

Second, I just get so frustrated when I don't understand why people, both young and old, are so difficult and sometimes rude or obnoxious! We all know of someone who is like this. When I encounter a difficult person, I instantly don't understand them. In turn, I often look down on them, thinking, "Why can't you do things this way or that way?" In other words, my way.

I guess you can say that I am a control freak. That is where the humility pep talk comes in. Being a control freak is not a good quality to have. I just need to stop worrying about other people and focus on myself. Its very difficult, so I am praying for help continually as I battle these struggles...

Here's some great inspiration:
"You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Ephesians 4: 22-24

Talk to Myself Thursday

2010-07-15T13:24:00.000-05:00

I have some things that I have to get off my chest! I have been struggling so much with control issues and not understanding people, that I need to talk to the world, but mainly to myself (and warning, you may get offended):

I am not God's gift to this world. My opinion and my way of doing things are not that important. As much as I like to adhere to them, nobody really cares. My baby, as cute as I think she is, will soon be bratty like so many other children that I encounter. Just because she is my child, it doesn't mean that she won't be a complete demon someday! She may be an angel, but there are no guarantees! I need to learn to shut up, trust God, and focus on Him, instead of judging people so often that I do.

Some people are reading this, and thinking, yes, you do need to shut up! And you are right! This next part will be offensive, so please forgive me!

To the world:
You are not God's gift to this planet, and neither is your child. Your child is irritating sometimes, and I can't stand it. I don't always want your opinion, and sometimes, you get on my nervestoo .

Now, to myself again:
Jennifer, you are not God's gift to this planet and neither is Lily. She can be irritating sometimes and when she becomes a toddler, will definitely get on people's nerves. Try to understand this when people are less than heartwarming toward your child. Not everyone wants your opinion, and you probably do get on people's nerves!

Final thoughts:
Everyone in this world is a special creation from God. The only true gift to humanity was Jesus Christ, who came to the planet to save us from our sins and bring us into a right relationship with Him.

We just need some humility in our lives...starting with myself first!

Yes, I Put My Sleeping Baby on the Table

2010-07-12T18:51:00.000-05:00

What do you do when your kid falls asleep while out running errands? You leave them right where they are so that they can nap! And in this picture, she is in her carrier on our kitchen table.

Our wiener dog loves to lick her like crazy, so if I put her at floor level, he'd wake her up. So, what else is there to do but put her on the table?!

What weird things do you do with your babies?

Some Surprising Facts about Parenthood...

2010-07-09T21:54:00.000-05:00

In the course of the last six months, I have learned a few things about Miss Lily that I never expected:

Don't drink coffee while nursing your baby. Your little one may kick your coffee cup and cause it to spill all over the place. This has actually happened more than once in the last week. You would think that I would learn from the first spill!

Don't take off your baby's diaper when you are about to give her a bath until the very last minute. She may pee all over the place! Little boys are known for spraying you, but I promise that little girls can get the right velocity down as well and get you wet everywhere! Just ask Mike!

Baby clothes are an expensive necessity that they always blow through! Outfits only last for a couple of months at most, and that is only if your little one is a slow grower like mine. But then, sometimes these babies surprise you - Miss Lily is almost seven months old and wore a six month sleeper to bed tonight! She usually wears 3 month or 3-6 month sleepers.

Babies love you unconditionally in the same way that you love them. I can tell by the way that Lily looks and smiles at me. We share a strong bond that I never expected.

And I love every minute of it.

Wal-Mart Musings

2010-07-08T00:01:00.000-05:00

Tonight I got out of the house to go on a late-night Wal-Mart shopping trip. We are short on a few necessities, so I did what all night owls do and went to the store at 10:30 at night. This took place after the baby was put to bed, and the husband was closer to heading there as well.

I have some thoughts for all fellow Wal-Mart shoppers to ponder:

-To Dixie paper plates, thank you for changing the look of your plates. They are now white with pretty blue flowers. Very simple and nice. I appreciate this subtle difference, as it just makes my day a little brighter! Your old design was kinda ugly, but I still bought your paper plates anyway.

-To all make-up manufacturers, how am I going to buy from you if I have no idea what is what? I have no clue what colors to get in eye shadow. I was just perusing the make-up aisle in hopes of getting some new colors soon, and I am lost! What looks good with blue eyes and brown hair? What is good quality and what isn't? Being nerdy, I am terrible with make-up!! To my friend from Arkansas who sells Mary-Kay that used to help me out with eye colors, I miss your expertise!

-To all baby clothing manufacturers, you don't have very good clothing options. I refuse to buy clothing from you, as most of your stuff is just not my style. And I will not pay $4 for a dress for my baby girl that I don't care for!

Alas, I still love you Wal-Mart! You have everything under one roof and you have good prices.

I still miss my Wal-Marts from Northwest Arkansas. The one here in Edmond just isn't as nice as the one off of I-540 in Rogers! I miss you, South Rogers Wal-Mart!

So, these are my late night shopping thoughts! What do you love or hate about Wal-Mart?