5 Random The Office Quotes

Season 5 - Two Weeks

Michael Scott: I'm going to start my own paper company.
Jim Halpert: You're starting your own paper company!
Michael Scott: Yeah!
Jim Halpert: Why?
Michael Scott: Can you believe it? 'Cause I know paper. I know everything there is to know about paper.
Jim Halpert: Do you know that the industry is in decline?
Michael Scott: Yeah! Oh God I practically invented decline, right?

Season 2 - The Secret

Jim Halpert: Nothing much, what's up with you?
Pam Beesly: I cannot believe I fell for that. [laughs]
Michael Scott: [walks in] What? Where's the funny? Give it to me.
Jim Halpert: Um, is it just me, or does it smell like up-dog in here?
Michael Scott: What's up-dog?
Jim Halpert: Nothing much, what's up with you?
Michael Scott: Oh, oh, wow! I walked right into that. Oh, that's brilliant!

Season 6 - Whistleblower

Nick: Mind if I get in there for a second?
Dwight Shrute: Oh, sure thing, go ahead.
[Dwight grabs Nick as he reaches for Dwight's computer]
Nick: Ah! Dwight what the hell!
Dwight Shrute: Apache persuasion hold, that's the hell! What are you doing to my computer?

Season 7 - China

Dwight Schrute: They say the best vampires don't bleed their victims dry, but give them the strength so that they can bounce back only to be fed on again. I spared Pam, and I may feast off of her profits for years to come. I let Pam win. Haha, oh. I was not motivated by compassion. I have no compassion. Make sure you got that. Not motivated by compassion.

Season 2 - The Carpet

Pam Beesly: Hey, what's that word we made up when you have a thing stuck in your shoe? Anyway, I have a thing stuck in my shoe.