Spirit of Adoption

We have been matched!!!

2011-12-09T08:27:00.000-08:00

I have waited so long to be able to write that heading!!

I know I have been terrible about updating this blog, but to be honest, after the initial months of paperwork and getting approved by our agency, all that was left to do was to wait. Not really much to talk about when all you are doing is waiting! We spent almost a year and half without hearing nothing, NADA, peep, from our agency.

After a year, it was time to renew our home study and although we were a bit discouraged about the fact that a whole year had passed without so much as a possibility thrown our way, our case worker encouraged us by saying that most adoptions like ours, if not finalized within the first year, are usually completed before the second. She also put us in contact with an adoption facilitator that has been absolutely amazing! Within weeks of being approved with her office, we began getting calls about possible opportunities for us. All of these ended up falling through, but at least something was happening, right?

In October of this year we were contacted about a possible case for us. We immediately began praying about it. It ended up taking several weeks before we were able to get enough information on the case to be able to make a decision. Then once the we decided to go forward, we found out that another family was being considered as well for this particular adoption. So, we continued to pray that the Lord's will would be done. After all, we only wanted the baby that the Lord had for us. Even if it meant waiting longer.

On November 21, we were standing in a very long line at the Atlanta airport, surrounded by all of our luggage, when we finally received THE call. Jeff and Aaron were standing several feet away from me guarding some additional luggage when I answered the phone. "The birth mother picked you guys!" is what the voice on the other end said. It was an amazing moment. Surreal, unbelievable. It took several moments for it to actually sink in. If you knew all of the circumstances of what goes behind the scenes of an adoption and you knew the thoughts that go through your mind, the decisions that have to be made, the emotions that you go through, you begin to better understand what THE call feels like. God is good. This didn't happen when we wanted it to. It actually seems like the worse timing ever! I mean, we were headed back to Spain after months of being on furlough and now we get the call?! And yet, God's timing is always right. And we continue to rest on the fact that HIs ways are not our ways and His thought are not our thoughts and He knows what is best.

We found out yesterday that our baby is scheduled to be born via C-section on January 6th!! And it's a girl! Another secret desire of my heart that we left completely up to God.

We are excited and a big overwhelmed, trying to decide on a name, making lists of things we need. I mean, we have nothing right now for a baby, nothing! With adoption, it's very difficult to plan ahead. We didn't know if it was going to be a boy or a girl, if it would be a newborn or a 1 year old, what time of year he/she would be born and how long it would be before we were matched! And then you get a call and find out that you have a little over a month to get things ready. But it's all good. Believe me. No complaining here!!

Please, please pray for us. There are still so many variables with adoption. Anything could happen. And yet, we trust God with each new day that He gives us and hope in Him.

I will try to keep things a little more updated as we are able to share more details. Thank you to everyone who has been praying for us over the last several years. When we shared with close friends and family that we had been matched, the response from everyone was amazing. We realized how many people had really been praying for us and were genuinely excited with us. What a blessing to have such a amazing friends and family.

Adoption Update

2011-04-15T14:52:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking for a while that it's probably about time to update our adoption blog and after looking at how long it's been since my last post, yikes!! Yeah, it's been a while. haha

So, where are we on our adoption process? Waiting, waiting, waiting.

In November we received an e-mail from our caseworker that said we should contact a lawyer in California about a potential opportunity for us. We read the information she sent and immediately called the lawyer, only to find out that the e-mail was a week old and the baby had already been matched with another family. It was a bit disappointing, but honestly, we have said from the beginning that we only want the baby that God has for us and we believe that He will work all the details out when it's our turn. So, we knew for sure that this was not our baby!

Then in December we received another e-mail from our adoption agency. This time, it was a general e-mail for all the families waiting to adopt, that are with our agency. They told us that this past year they had seen adoption rates decline significantly. Currently, there are 17 families waiting to adopt with our agency and at that time, they were only dealing with 4 mothers who were only "considering" putting their babies up for adoption. Now THAT was discouraging news.

The saddest part for us was finding out that the reason for the adoption rates dropping was not because more mother's were choosing to keep their babies, but rather, more and more mother's had chosen abortion. This is absolutely heartbreaking news, period. I think that it's that much harder to grasp for the couple that is praying for God to bless them with a child of their own and then you hear of these babies being killed. But honestly, it's hard for anyone to swallow.

That said, we KNOW that God is still in control of our lives and He will do His will in His perfect timing; not our own. I really wouldn't want it any other way. My heart aches to hold a baby in my arms again, but this waiting journey has made me ask where my joy is. Am I only content when God answers my prayers? Or am I content IN Him? In HIM and HIM alone; choosing to trust His will over my own. I am already SO blessed. He does not need to do one more thing for me. What amazes me is that He still chooses to bless me. When I begin to realize how great He is and how small I am, all I can do is thank Him everyday for His mercy towards me. And honestly, He does give peace and joy and strength each time I waver. He is absolutely AMAZING!

So, where are we right now? Waiting, waiting, waiting.

It's been one year since we were approved to adopt and we really don't know how much longer it will be. But we are grateful for so many people who are praying for us and who are kind enough to ask how we are doing. We are so thankful for what God is doing in our lives at this moment. We are busy in the ministry that He has allowed us to be a part of here in Spain and amazed to see what God is doing in the lives of the people who have put their trust in Him. We are blessed to have our family close by. We are blessed to be the parents of an amazing 8 year old boy who I seriously wish would quit growing so quickly.

Holding that baby, someday, whenever and if ever God chooses to bless us that way, will simply be an amazing gift.

Grateful, So Grateful!!!

2010-05-04T15:28:00.000-07:00

Hi there!! Yes, we are still alive and still working on our adoption, but things have been busy around here since we got back to Spain and I just haven't found the time to update our blog. But, I do have exciting news!!

Our home study has been officially approved!! YAY!! Yipee!! Hooray!! Praise the Lord!

And...

as of yesterday,

our agency will now begin to show our family profile to potential birth mothers!!

We have completed one big hurdle and now begins the waiting game. We could get a call any day, like it could take a year to receive the call. Believe it or not, having to wait is not really bothering us at all. Just knowing that we are where we are in this adoption process is exciting enough. We have 'waited' for 5 years for the Lord to give us another baby and He has given us grace!! So I know He will provide us with the grace for this next phase of waiting. We are sooo excited and a little nervous, because it just seems more real now!!

Thanks to everyone who has been praying with us about this adoption. We get e-mails and calls from friends that say they are praying and that is so overwhelming to us. The Lord has given us so many wonderful friends around the world and such a supportive family. We are grateful, so grateful!!

Homestudy Update

2010-03-20T18:03:00.001-07:00

Wow! I so meant to keep everyone more up to date on what we have been doing over the last few weeks, but things have been hectic, crazy and oh, ...we have had a blast! I have not spent very much time on the computer at all, which has actually been nice!

So, where are we on our adoption process?

After lots of paperwork and some running around...Our Homestudy has been completed!

Several people have asked us what a homestudy is exactly. Basically, it consists of 3 visits with your social worker. For our first visit she interviewed Jeff and I together. Second time we were interviewed separately and for the third visit she came to our home here in GA to make sure that it was child proof! We had a wonderful social worker who made our homestudy experience painless instead of invasive like we thought it may be. She has felt like a cheerleader to us, wanting us to adopt a baby as much as we do and cheering us along the way!

What next?

We are still waiting for a few more documents to arrive and when they do, our social worker can complete her end of the homestudy and we will officially be an approved, adoptive family!! Looks like this could all be completed within a month.

So, in the next few days we will be heading back to Spain to begin our wait. We have sent a profile book, which is like a scrapbook of our lives, to our adoption agency and when our homestudy has been approved by our social worker, our agency will begin showing our profile to prospective birth mothers.

The Lord knows who and when someone will choose us to be the parents for her baby and in the meantime, we are happy to have completed this first step and are looking forward to getting back to Spain!!

I have more to update on, but I need to go play with my son, so....till next time!!

Name Your Price Photography Sessions!!! Limited offer!!

2010-02-22T14:17:00.001-08:00

As many of you know, we are in the States right now working on all the paperwork required to complete our home study. Part of the process of adoption is raising the funds needed to complete the adoption. We have been saving for sometime now and are doing our best to be diligent with what the Lord gives us and manage it wisely. The Lord has been good to us and daily supplies for our needs and I believe that He blesses the efforts of those who do their part!

That said, we are trying to think of creative ways of raising extra money for our adoption and one of the ways that we have thought of is through offering photography sessions. I have been trying to think of what to charge and how to make it special for this occasion and finally decided that at least for the time that we are here, which is only 5 weeks, that I will just let people decide what they would like to pay! How does that sound!?

I know...a little crazy, but I want to offer people the opportunity of having some pictures taken and have the option of it being within their price range, whatever that may be and also to know that all money that I make will go directly into our adoption fund. This is a worthy cause and a win/win situation for everyone!!!

This is a limited offer, so act quickly!! We will be in the Atlanta area until the 5th of March and then in Florida from the 6th till the 14th of March. Then back in Atlanta from the 15th till the 23rd of March. I am willing to travel up to an hour within the Atlanta radius. Please tell your friends and family about this offer and book quickly!!

Here is a picture from my most recent photo shoot. Can you believe I get to be this little girl's aunt! I know it's not just me either when I say...she is BEAUTIFUL!!

To see more of my photos click here

Made it to Georgia!!

2010-02-12T13:00:00.000-08:00

We made it safely to Georgia! We have only been here for two days and have already been running all over the place getting a bunch of paperwork done in preparation for our home study.
Have you ever seen that criminal investigation show called The First 48 hrs.? Well, here is a rundown of our first 48 hrs.....

.....quick trip to the post office
.....sheriff's office
.....holding my beautiful niece
....digitally scanned fingerprints
....ink fingerprints
....quick trip to Atlanta
....visit to the dr. that involved needles and blood being draw. ouch!!
....police department
....giving kisses to my niece and nephew
....another quick trip to the post office
....two trips to the grocery store
....stopping to grab a bite to eat
....looking for some gluten free food to snack on between meals!
....finding out that Moe's has gluten free food!!
....girls trip to Kohls in the middle of a snow blizzard! But hey, a girls gotta shop!!

Phew! All this, and we are still trying to get over jet lag! But it's really fun to finally be able to get some of this done now that we are stateside and see the process of adoption moving another step further.

We got back from running around Atlanta this afternoon and my sister-in-law had some yummy steaks waiting for us. Here is a picture of my brother, sister in law, Favi and husband, grilling the steaks in the snow.

We are also trying to think of some ways of raising money for the adoption and I have something in the works that I will be posting about really soon. If you live within an hour radius of the Atlanta area, be looking out for my post, because it may be something you can take advantage of!!

We have our plane tickets!!

2010-02-02T07:05:00.000-08:00

Yep! We bought them this morning! We are leaving next week and will be in the States for a few weeks till we complete our home study. We are sooo excited!!!

Why? Well...

1. We are onto our next phase of our adoption!
2. This is a big step and I can't believe how quickly the Lord has orchestrated for all this to come together!
3. As an extra bonus.....I GET TO SEE MY NEW NIECE, HAYDEN!!!!

I leave you with a picture of my beautiful niece. Isn't she adorable!! See why this aunt is proud? haha

So what's next?

2010-02-01T07:54:00.000-08:00

What's next you might ask? Lots and lots of homework in the form of PAPERWORK!! Fun, fun!! Ok, maybe not so much fun, BUT it is exciting! = ) We have actually almost used an entire packet of printer paper to print out all the forms we need to fill-out and mail in. That doesn't include all the forms we get to fill out that can be done online and e-mailed. YAY!! YIPEE!! haha

But, I have to say, a domestic adoption does require a whole lot LESS paperwork than an international adoption does. So that is something to be thankful for!!

Also, Jeff and I have already had to do so much in the paperwork department while working on our visas to get into Spain, that honestly, this seems like a breeze compared to all that we had to do for that. I told Jeff the other day, that now it seems like a blessing that we had so much hassle with our visas, because now I feel better prepared to work on our adoption paperwork!

Also next on the agenda, looking for plane tickets! Yep, we are flying to the States for a few weeks to do our home study in Georgia. We have found a Christian home study agency that has been more than willing to work with us and we look forward to this next phase of our adoption.

So, I guess I need to get off this blog and back to my huge pile of paperwork.....

BTW, Aaron asked if he could help, but I'm thinking he may be about to change his mind!.....hahaha

We've Been Approved!!

2010-01-30T04:24:00.002-08:00

Yes!! How exciting!! We have finally heard back from our adoption agency and have been officially approved for adoption. We have also had some changes since we first started and can only describe them as the Lord directing our path in ways that we did not think possible.

I mentioned before that we had some very important decisions to make and they were concerning the choice between a baby from China or an infant in the States. Our original heart's desire was to adopt an infant, but after many calls to different adoption agencies, none of them offered us much hope in that area, because of us living oversees. It seemed like it was too complex of a situation and we couldn't find anyone willing to work with us.

So, we began looking into International Adoption and were eventually led to China. It was amazing what the Lord began to do in our hearts and how open we had become to even special needs children. That is something that I never thought I would be open to! But we began to move forward and were very, very excited about welcoming a Chinese baby girl into our family. We found an amazing agency that was more than willing to help us with all aspects of having to work on the process from Spain. So, we moved forward and then we began to hit some obstacles. With each one, we prayed and felt like we would be willing to move forward, but then we realized that we had never even asked our agency about domestic adoption! I had already asked so many others, that I knew what they would say, plus, hadn't the Lord led us away from that option?

So I asked. They're answer? Yes!! Yes it was possible!! We told them that was our first choice and they presented us with options that we simply did not know that we had available to us! Now we were faced with a very important decision and a hard one, because now the Lord had opened our hearts to so much!! We prayed. Really prayed and sought the Lord and after talking some more with our agency and having them answer every question and concern we had, we knew what decision we needed to make.

We chose a domestic adoption. And can I say...we have peace; much peace! After 11 moves in 8 years of marriage and going from making plans to be missionaries to one country, only to see the Lord lead us to another, I have learned that God works in mysterious ways! He many times leads us down some very, windey paths. Many times I have panicked when I have seen Him change our direction, but the few times I have chosen to just trust, I have found such peace! I can truly say that this process so far has been amazing. This has been one of those peaceFUL times. We just know that the Lord has a baby for us. Who, where, when? That is all up to Him. I am just sooo excited about seeing how He is going to do it all!!

Our hearts have forever been impacted with the possibility of adopting a baby from China and who knows....the Lord may eventually lead us down that road at some other time. For now, we are content in His leading.

Facts about U.S. Teen Pregnancies

2010-01-23T14:38:00.000-08:00

Thanks everyone for praying. The Lord has helped us in the last few days as we made some important decisions and hopefully I will be able to share them with you soon. Right now we are waiting on a call from the agency we are working with to see if we have been approved to go through them. Hopefully we will know something this next week. I think that once we get accepted by an agency, this adoption will seem more real! Every step gets us closer!

I thought I would share a few facts I found online about U.S. teen pregnancies. Pretty shocking numbers!!....

....More than one million U.S. teens get pregnant each year. More than 31,000 are teens younger than 15. The Alan Guttmacher Institute

....3,000 American teenagers become pregnant each day (that's 1 in 10 women under age 20). If patterns do not change, 4 in 10 women will get pregnant at least once while still a teenager. The Alan Guttmacher Institute

....Of the more than one million pregnant teens each year, 500,000 will choose to parent their babies, 450,000 will abort and fewer than 100,000 will place their babies for adoption. U.S. Census Bureau

....There are approximately one million infertile U.S. couples waiting to adopt. This number does NOT reflect the large number of single parents and fertile couples also waiting to adopt. National Committee for Adoption

....Approximately 50,000 U.S. children are adopted each year. One half (roughly 25,000) are infants. Another 10,000 foreign-born children are adopted by American couples. National Committee for Adoption

....Young women who make adoption plans for their children are more likely to delay marriage, be employed and have a higher income than single parents. National Committee for Adoption

Easy ways to follow our blog

2010-01-20T11:58:00.000-08:00

There are several ways that you can follow our blog.

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The road takes a bend..

2010-01-19T03:16:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I knew that this journey was going to be one of many twists and turns, but I didn't expect one to come so soon! So, after all the excitement of the initial application step, we woke up on Monday to what would seem like a major setback. And then one thing led to another and then another thing piled over that....It's true what they say..."When it rains it pours!!"

When we finally caught our breath at the end of the day, we realized two things...
1. God's timing and plan is not always our own
2. After many times of learning this, you would think we would have that one figured out by now!!

After spending much time in prayer last night, we woke up this morning and began to slowly realize that what may seem like a setback, may indeed just be God directing us on His path, which may involve more waiting on our part, but His path is where we desperately want to be!

If you are wondering, yes, we are still adopting! It just may take a little longer than we might want. We have to make some choices soon, that may be the difference between waiting 1 year or 2. We were hoping to get things done this year, but it may run into next year and that is a bit rough to think about, but still worth the wait!!

I wanted to thank those of you who have written to us saying that you would be praying along with us during this process. That means so much to us!! There are few things in life as amazing as knowing that others are praying for you! So, if you are praying, here are our first two requests:

1. Pray that the Lord would lead us to make the right decision that we need to make at this time. One that would lead us to the baby that He has for us!
2. Pray that the Lord will provide the money that we need for this adoption. We will do our part to be stewards of what He gives us and want to trust Him to bring it all in!

I read this last night and it was just what I needed and I thought I would share, as it may be encouraging to someone else as well......

Click on the picture for a better view.

And So It Begins....

2010-01-16T04:13:00.000-08:00

This is it. Step one. The first step of many more to come. But every step gets us that much closer! We have officially begun our adoption process. Yes! It's true! We sent our application papers out on Friday to a wonderful Christian adoption agency in North Carolina. I will share how the Lord led us to that particular agency at some point, but today, I just wanted to say that we have started. This process has been in the making for some time now, but we had to wait for God's timing. If it had been up to me, this would have happened a long time ago, but that would have been a mistake and He knows best! We are just excited that it's finally here!

We sent out our prayer letter a few days ago, with our news about adopting, and have received some wonderful responses from friends and from others who we have never met, but that have promised to parter with us in prayer. How encouraging! I wanted to share one e-mail that was a particular blessing to me. This is from a lady that attends one of our supporting churches in Sartell, Minnesota:

Dear Jeff and Deanna,

Thank you so much for the update. I just have to tell you the amazingness of this update. Just yesterday the Lord laid your family on my heart, and it was specifically about more children for you. I prayed for you !! thanks for sharing, now I will pray more fervently!! God gave us 5- and that was after we were told we would never have any!! Our God is great, and HE has a plan for you both!!! Have a wonderful day serving HIM !!

Brenda O'Brien

I hope to post the details of our journey to serve as a way of keeping a journal for us as a family to be able to look back on and see how the Lord led us through.

I also hope that this blog would serve as an encouragement to others who have also embarked on this journey. I would love to meet any of you who are also in the adoption process so that we can pray together for one another until the Lord brings each of our children home!

So there it is....and so it begins!!!