How many of us have excused anger, contempt, blame and other negative emotions by pointing to the behavior of another person? I certainly have.

While this is natural, it only hurts us all. When we are children, we are exposed to a lot of negativity: parents fighting with each other, mothers or fathers imposing ego-based discipline on us (as opposed to discipline that is truly for our highest good), violence in our families, mocking and cruelty from other children, a world at war and the weak being dominated by the strong. In the face of so much pain and abuse, we have adopted stances and behaviors that feel self-protective. We develop sarcasm, a quick tongue, judgmental attitudes, a loud voice, powerful positions or other dominating ways. We make alliances, join teams and gangs, bond with one another to protect ourselves by violence of thought, word or action. We distrust one another, manipulate and remain hyper-vigilant. In other words, we do, think and say whatever it takes to overpower the darkness that seems as though it will overpower us.

And all the while we explain that it’s because “he,” “she,” or “they” have or might do “this” or “that” to us or others. And all the while, we are giving others an excuse to use negative emotions and behaviors against us.

I don’t trust women, so I keep my distance, which gives my girlfriend the excuse to withdraw from me or try to manipulate me into committing to her. I fear your cheating me, so I try to trick you into acceding to my wishes, which gives you the excuse to condemn or even sue me. I fear him, so I plan a surprise attack, which gives him an excuse to double his own arsenal.

Using the dark side to fight the dark side: it’s where we use negative emotions, thoughts and behaviors in order to ward off being hurt by the negative emotions, thoughts and behaviors of others; or where we use negative emotions, thoughts or behaviors after being hurt to gain revenge, regain the upper hand or at the very least give our egos some satisfaction making ourselves feel superior in front of ourselves or others.

We all use the dark side to fight the dark side, but we do it in more or less subtle ways. Some of us are obvious bullies. Some of us are quiet smirkers or judges. Some of us cloak our dark side behavior behind the mask of caring for others, fighting injustice or being a stand for nation or God. Others of us try to hide our dark side behind the collective darkness, doing what is socially acceptable, such as rooting for our own team and hoping others will lose in a context where everybody else is doing the same thing.

Using the dark side to fight the dark side: do we have a choice? We always have a choice. The question is are we willing to take the risk or pay the price for making the other choice?

If we drop the “protection” of the dark side, we can feel overwhelmed by our fear, the fear that motivated us to call on the dark side to start with. If I do not fight, defend, dominate, I will be hurt. Yet as we begin to examine our behaviors, we realize that using the dark to fight the dark has a price, too. At the very least, we are uncomfortable on the inside, because we always feel the pain we inflict on others. And once we feel the pain we inflict on another, we are further compelled to justify our behavior, which causes us to engage in more and more vociferous condemnation of the other, while simultaneously rationalizing our own behavior. Now we are lost in the whirlwind of negative feelings that we are spewing forth about the “other,” and we become even sicker. We feel negative, and we lose our way. If we have been manipulative or deceitful, for example, we now have more to cover up or defend through further deceit or manipulation. If we have been contemptuous of another, we have to make him or her seem even more contemptible. If we have been untrusting, we have to keep proving the other’s untrustworthiness.

What world do we live in? The world that exists between our ears, in our hearts and in our minds. The price we pay for using the dark side against the dark side is that we live in our own inner darkness. Is it worth it?

When we take a stand for consciousness, we may risk being hurt, exploited or cheated, but we always carry within us the strength that comes from self-respect and the good feeling that comes from feeling clean, clear and aligned with The Source. People who have come together to fight injustice with nonviolence have found this strength and have offered an alternative for other people to choose as well. They have eroded the heart of darkness through their stand for something better, and they have shaken our world by creating peace within themselves.

What about you? Perhaps you hang on to the right to use the dark side to protect you. Perhaps you have been giving up this right piece by piece but are hanging on in certain areas that seem more important or sensitive, areas which you still justify or can’t even see.

There is a choice. Who do you want to be? Do you want to pay the price of choosing the dark side, or are you willing to take a chance on consciousness?

Here’s my invitation: The next time you feel yourself in a negative space, such as feeling angry, judgmental, contemptuous, manipulative, untrusting or vindictive, ask yourself if you are trying to use the dark side to fight the dark side. Ask yourself what price you are paying for doing so. Ask yourself what price the other is paying, what the relationship is losing. And then ask yourself if it’s worth it. If it’s not, let’s relinquish the right to use the dark side at all. The more of us do it, the safer our world will be.

Now we are putting our energy behind bringing the words of our founder into these same arenas in the form of blogs that infuse higher consciousness into everyday living. These blogs invite each of us to become a co-conspirator in unraveling the human consciousness that has governed us for so long. You can find the blogs at Beth’s Place (www.bethsplace.org) and we’ll be sharing them with you through the Spiritual Activist Movement newsletter.

The latest blog is “Gay Teens Committing Suicide. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. How Religion Has Tried to Silence God!” Beth expresses her concern regarding the use of God against gays. You can read it by clicking here.

A previous blog helped us to understand when to persevere and when to surrender our agendas. Called “Living in the Mystery; Pushing the Boulder Uphill,” you can find it by clicking here.

Please help spread the word, support and consciousness by telling your friends about Beth’s Place, passing on the videos and blogs and returning to the site yourself! We hope you return often to gather and give the support and inspiration we need to continue our journey toward oneness.

Them’s fightin’ words!  We were in a couple’s counseling session, and the question posed was, “What do you need to fight for in your lives right now?”

I am a 73-year-old woman, and I realized that I need to fight to be in reality about my physical and mental capacities, as well as my need for support.

As we talked about my partner’s challenge to “fight for” our marriage by being more actively engaged in our relationship, he said, challengingly, “Is that an ‘or else’?!”  My first reaction was to be safe and to reassure him that my intention was not to threaten him.  But my new attraction to reality made me think again: “Of course it is!”  All of life is an “or else”!  I have to eat right and exercise “or else” I’ll become weak, depressed, debilitated and die.  I have to manage my finances “or else” we’ll lose the house.   I have to go to work, or apply for unemployment, “or else” we’ll starve.  All of life is a big “or else”!  Why do I think otherwise?  Why does it seem like a threat?

We need to look reality in the face and accept our inadequacies, have compassion and reach out to one another (who also have their inadequacies) “or else” we’ll be forever ranting about how unfair life is.  Accepting  the “or else”-ness of life rather than being threatened by it is a great step toward embracing who we are and fulfilling our potential.

As a member of the Spiritual Activist Movement (SAM), I am dedicated to oneness, accountability and acting from what is for the highest good of all.

But when an opportunity came up to attend World Fest in Woodland Hills, California to spread the word about the Spiritual Activist Movement, the first thought I had was, “How much time will it take to get there?” and “Haven’t I done enough, supporting Earth Day in San Diego and Santa Monica?”

A friend suggested maybe I’d find a way to get inspired about WorldFest. That’s when it dawned on me: I don’t need more inspiration.  I just need to follow what the Source would have me do.  I needed to give up the addiction to being inspired and follow the spiritual practice of asking the Source, what is for the highest good of all?  And then act on that regardless of how I feel.

When I asked whether it would support the highest good of all for me to pitch in at World Fest, the answer was yes. So, I went. Being there gave me the opportunity to meet others who are also breaking the human habit of thinking about ourselves first.  I met many people who resonate with the Spiritual Activist Movement commitments and who are practicing them.  Some people asked for more information to support their practice and I shared The Stream’s teachings through workshops, LifeForce workouts, books, music and mutual support meetings. It felt so right to be there, doing my part to help unite our world.

We are extremely excited about this alliance and opportunity, felt a great deal of synergy and chi in speaking with one of the organization’s leaders on Monday and look forward to our collaboration.

WorldShift 2012 is a global movement dedicated to co-creating the foundations of a peaceful, just and sustainable world by the end of 2012.  It draws attention to the global state of social, economic and environmental emergencies we now face, and proposes a series of actions and solutions to help humanity deal with the problems we may encounter.  WorldShift 2012 seeks to unite and engage everyone in this process by signing the WorldShift Declaration and to collectively and consciously commit to the process of transformational change required.  For more on the Worldshift Movement and Worldshift 2012, click here .

We will share more details about our collaboration as we proceed. Below is our initial letter to the WorldShift organization. It’s a great summary of what we are offering to other partners in the spirit of cooperation, co-creation and mutual support.

RE: Request to become a WorldShift 2012 Partner

Dear WorldShift Management (Gareth, Dana and Dominic),

We are so excited to have found you. We too feel that a shift in consciousness is happening in our world. We have felt it in ourselves, and we have seen it in one other. And we believe, as you do, that all our problems boil down to one problem, which is the current state of human consciousness – the fact that we are so often dominated by the ego: by immature, short-term, me-based thinking. We too are dedicated to supporting the shift in consciousness that is essential to creating a sustainable, peaceful and mutually supportive world – a world based on the reality that we are one.

We are writing today to request to be a partner of the WorldShift 2012 alliance. We’d like to give you a brief history of our organization and let you know what we feel we can bring to WorldShift and its partners.

The Spiritual Activist Movement History
The Spiritual Activist Movement (SAM) is a project of The Stream , a nonprofit educational corporation which is at the same time a spiritual community and a teaching organization based in San Diego, California. SAM is an initiative to unite our world in transcending the domination of the human ego and bringing higher consciousness into everyday life; it is a commitment to live timeless principles of Oneness, accountability and mutual support in everything we do, everywhere and under all circumstances.

We re-launched the movement in March 2010 (it was originally launched in 1993), and since then we have embarked on a journey to find all individuals and organizations, both nonprofit and corporate, who resonate with this call and want to integrate it into their daily practices at home, at work, and in all areas of their life. Here is the statement of commitment which is at the core of this movement:

1. Acknowledge that we are one.
There is no “they.” Despite our apparent differences, we are all one. The damage I do to another, I do to myself. The love I give another, I give to myself. Whether I admire, fear or despise another, I commit to recognizing our Oneness. Whoever you are, “I am that.”

2. Become accountable for our impact, individually and collectively.
We are accountable for the impact of everything we say, do, feel or think. We commit to become more aware of the impact of our actions and attitudes on ourselves and each other and to get the support we need to overcome the personal and collective behaviors that destroy us, those around us and our planet.

3. Build a mutually supportive world by choosing the highest good of all.
Sometimes our instinct is to choose our personal short-term interests over the good of the whole, but we realize that no one thrives in a world dominated by narrow self-interest. We commit to letting our hearts and actions be guided by the question: What is for the highest good of all, including me? And we commit to transcend our fears and instincts and do what we know is best for ourselves, others and our planet.

Since our launch, we have been reaching out to like minded people and organizations to unify our efforts, as well as to help to unify the larger movement of building a sustainable world. We have been doing this through:

- Media relations and social media
- Outreach at conferences, trade shows and fairs
- “Publishing” articles and other materials
- Word of mouth

With our outreach efforts, we are delighted to have discovered that so many similar organizations exist, including WorldShift 2012, Four Years.Go. and many others. We are committed to be a part of this growing movement.

What we have to offer

• An Educational Platform
  Many people seem to get the idea of Oneness, but how do we live it on a daily basis? How do we support people to live Oneness consciousness in the halls of government, with our children, with people that we don’t really like?For 30 years, Beth Green, founder of The Stream and the Spiritual Activist Movement , has been researching in a practical way the question of how to help people embrace oneness as a foundation for behavior and has developed an educational platform which includes a free book (Living with Reality: Bringing Higher Consciousness into Everyday Life), a series of workshops and free mutual support telephone meetings.

The book, which is available as a free download on the internet, offers a road map for bringing higher consciousness into everyday life. The book and program include tools and practices that help those who use them to live oneness on a daily basis.

A key aspect of this program is to ask, “What is for the highest good of all, including myself?” every time that we have a decision to make. This act – asking what is for the highest good – cultivates the beliefs and values that are necessary for the fundamental shift in consciousness. The question works because it cultivates oneness. As we continue to ask the question, it becomes automatic instead of the ego response being automatic. And, it reminds us, every time we ask the question, every time a decision is made, that we are one.

• Energy, consciousness and a commitment to a thorough process of self-reflection and self-correction (through mutual support) to be the change we want to see in the world.
• Desire and passion for co-creating the evolution of consciousness with others and strengthening our ability to increase our collective impact by partnering with others.
• A daily commitment to bringing spiritual principles and practices into our everyday lives. We use the Living with Reality principles and practices in our families and in our businesses – ranging from science to management consulting to therapy to public education – and in every other aspect of our lives.

In asking to be a partner of the WorldShift 2012 Alliance, we accept the values and partner commitments stated on the WorldShift 2012 Alliance page of your website.

If you have any questions as you review our request, please feel free to contact me.  Please refer to our websites for more information and to get a fuller sense of what we are all about. We look forward to hearing your response.

United in oneness,

Todd Benton
Project Leader, The Spiritual Activist Movement
Executive Director, The Stream