But those were still just the breakthroughs of one person.

What I wanted is to see if there’s a pattern of defining moments and learnings people made in their lifetime, that had the power to take them to the next level.

If we understand which breakthroughs have the biggest impact to create a successful life, maybe we can accelerate reaching them.

So I thought: Why not ask people I know are the most successful people in their field about their breakthroughs in life?

So I did a little case-study and talked to people who are thought leaders in their field. May it be personal development, online marketing or even relationship experts.

Here are 4 of the results to asking:

What was your critical personal breakthrough on your path to where you are today?

1. “Everything is Learnable”

Brian Tracy, who had also a decisive impact on my life, is extraordinarily successful in personal and business development for decades now. Brian Tracy has consulted for more than 1,000 companies and addressed more than 5,000,000 people in 5,000 talks and seminars. He is the top selling author of over 45 books and has written and produced more than 300 audio and video learning programs.

He told me:

“Myrko,

It was when I learned that all business, personal and success skills are learnable through hard work and diligent application, over and over.

Good luck!
Brian”

Learning is the key to changing yourself. You can basically learn everything you want. And you can also relearn and change what you don’t want (for instance bad habits, limiting beliefs).

The message is this: Dream about what you want to become, believe that it’s possible… and then just learn the skills that will get you there.

2. “Start Now, Even If You Don’t Know”

Chris Brogan, who successfully blends business strategy with powerful personal development, is a sought-after keynote speaker who has addressed crowds of thousands and has consulted with companies like Disney, Microsoft, Coke, Google. He is the New York Times Bestselling author of seven books.

He said to me:

“Hello Myrko,

I worked. I simply accepted that I didn’t know what I was doing, but just started in somewhere and built from there.

If you’re not afraid of not knowing, you can accomplish a lot more than other people.

That plus being helpful are the only formula I’ve ever needed.

–Chris”

Too many are afraid of feeling incompetent and exploring the unknown. But what do you really have to lose?

The key for you is to get started and take one baby step forward. You’ll be amazed by what you can accomplish by diving into what you don’t know (yet) and consistently going small steps forward.

3. “Seize Your Opportunities”

Neil Strauss, is a multiple best selling author of books as writes also for Rolling Stone and The New York Times. He is famously known as the pick-up artist ‘Style’. After going undercover in a secret society of pickup artists, he finally started leaving the house, then wrote a book about it called The Game that became a New York Times bestseller.

Neil said:

“Myrko,

my biggest breakthrough came when I realized that I should just say “yes” to all opportunities.

It has made all the difference.”

It’s not so often that real opportunities present themselves, but if they do, you got to seize them.

When you’re facing a crossroads in your life, say “Yes!” and choose walking down the path that lets you grow the most.

4. “I Am Responsible”

Steve Pavlina, is one of the first and most recognized personal development bloggers, who has written the powerful book Personal Development for Smart People.

His response:

“Hi Myrko…

I realized, finally, that I was the one who put myself in that cell — that no one else had done it to me. Not the security guard who caught me. Not the officer who arrested me. Not society at large. I wasn’t even a victim of my own bad habits. I did it to myself.

And that sense of responsibility finally came crashing down on me. No one was coming to save me. If anything in my life was going to change, the impetus for that change would have to come from me.”

You’re the creator of your world. But to use this power you have to claim it.

By accepting full responsibility for yourself, you’ll be empowered and take control of your life.

What’s Your Breakthrough?

These were the 4 most critical breakthrough moments successful people experienced in their lifetime.

1. I Am Responsible
2. Everything Is Learnable
3. Seize Your Opportunities
4. Start Now, Even If You Don’t Know

So I’m very curious. What about your defining moments?

Please share what shaped you in the comments.

Or,

let me know about your current goals. Where would you like to break through to?

The post 4 Breakthroughs of Highly Successful People (Q&A with Brian Tracy, Chris Brogan, Neil Strauss, Steve Pavlina) appeared first on Myrko Thum.

It’s because we want to improve ourselves. We want to be the best we can be and live fully, right?

But that’s not the real reason.

Why would you want to improve yourself if there wouldn’t be a greater promise connected to it?

The real reason is because we all want to get somewhere. We want to reach an outcome.

We want to experience a great state or feeling, by growing inside and reaching our highest goals.

Those goals may be to be financially free, having a great relationship, a great business or job, or a strong mind and body. In short: We want to live an abundant lifestyle, the best life we can create.

The Outcome of Your Personal Development: Your Personal Breakthrough

So what is the end-result you have in mind when you engage in personal development? What is the outcome I can help you to achieve with my work?

I thought about that question for a long time now, especially because I want to focus on creating real results for you here.

Those can be internal or external results. In fact, any great external outcome is preceded by an internal one.

It’s in fact a universal law:

As within, so without.

The outcome of your personal development is to reach your personal breakthrough, which is when you become the person who is naturally able to reach your desired goals.

And your personal development is defining your unique path to get there. And your breakthrough will happen naturally when you hit a threshold.

And when we’re walking down this “breakthrough path” we will meet several challenges and experience several breakthrough moments that take us forward.

It’s like opening a door and having the opportunity to stepping through it into a new and better reality.

Or if you don’t accept that challenge (yet), to close that door and maybe open it later again. That’s why we have to face problems again and again until we break through and solve them once and for all, mostly inside of ourselves.

3 Short Stories About The Breakthrough Moments In My Life

I personally experienced several breakthrough moments on my path (so far). These were those moments where I opened an inner door by breaking through to a bigger reality.

The following 3 breakthrough insights were also incredible emotional moments for me. They shaped my life and defined who I am today.

1.
“I’m In Charge Here.”

Coming from a labor family in Eastern Germany, I was crying tears of joy as the wall came down and Germany reunited.

Still a teenager and full of hopes and dreams I started my studies and a new life. Finally I was leaving this old world of lack and limitation behind me.

Little did I know of the journey ahead of me…

It was a hot July afternoon when while playing a tennis match I suddenly felt weird and lost my sight and the ability to speak. The words where still coming to my mind, but I wasn’t able to articulate them anymore.

I was in panic! Is this the end already? (Read the full story here.)

While I recovered partly, this weird incident scared the hell out of me.

I was eager to get an explanation and help from my doctors, my parents and society in general — someone surely would help a 19 year old in that kind of trouble, right?

But they didn’t. And I was lost.

It took me several years to fully recover. And it would have taken forever, if I hadn’t had the following breakthrough moment:

Standing at a crossroads in my life to either giving up and die or finding hope and a way out again, I stumbled upon a quote in The 7 Habits by the legendary Stephen Covey which read:

“It’s not what happens to us, but our response to it.”

That quote hit me like a ton of bricks.

The second I read it, I woke up to the fact that was beginning to dawn on me already: Nobody else but me is fully responsible to create the life I want.

Look closely at the word responsibility. There are really two words:

Response – Ability.

You are able to choose your response. That’s where you have control.

What an empowering shift in thinking. So I chose my response. And took control of my own inner power to change my life. And I did it. That was the big “Aha!” moment, my first breakthrough that started everything.

You’ve got to be your own hero in your world. You have to take control of your life and accept this responsibility with all you’ve got. And then use this power proactively to build a remarkable life. The life you always dreamed of.

You can do this. Take control of your life now.

2.
“I Can Learn and Become Anything I Want.”

At the age of 25 I made a big decision in my life.

Right after my studies of computer science and psychology I moved to a new city to do one thing: Follow my passion.

It took a lot of courage.

I could have stayed on that well-worn path and looked for a job in the corporate world. But my heart was telling me something else.

There was a new opportunity in front of me and I knew it was the right thing to do. So I listened to my intuition, packed my stuff and jumped right into the next phase in my life.

I co-founded a company. It was a fun and exciting, but also extremely tough time.

Everything was new.

My past studies were almost of no use for the new challenges. I had to learn management, marketing and how to lead a company. Almost every aspect of my personality had to grow to meet the demands we set on ourselves.

It was one of those crossroads again.

Either I was going to go down right there or find a way to become the person who is able to meet those challenges and live up to my own vision of my life.

I was forced to grow.

That was the moment where I dived into personal development and learned the inner personal skills to avoid going down. And it worked out for me.

It was one of the most intense time of my working life. The market-situation didn’t allow the company  to grow and become a big success.

But I got something better. I was able to grow myself.

I realized that I can learn, grow and change myself to anything I want. That was a breakthrough moment and it lead to the critical groundwork and the foundation of the life I can call my own today.

Don’t settle for a life that is not making you happy. Don’t give up if you have to face tough times.

Whatever you need, you can learn it. You can change yourself and what we call “reality”. Nothing is set in stone. And reality is nothing but a concept in our heads.

You can learn and change everything, especially your own programming, which is determining how you see yourself and the world you’re in.

You can also acquire the necessary skills that get you want you want. You’re the king and creator of your world. Realize and use this power today.

3.
“Finding What I Love Is The Only Way”

2009 I left my company.

I was basically jobless. Again, a crossroads in my life.

I was facing being broke and giving up my dreams or finding a way to reboot my professional life within the next 3 or so months.

All that scared the hell out of me. But it also gave me a “kick in the butt” and drove me to take lots of focused action.

That was July 2009. I had 5k Euros in savings—that was it—and I had my mind…with the experience of running a 50-people company for over 9 years.

And I had something called the Internet, that I knew pretty well. It was another breakthrough moment when I realized that I have this huge platform at my fingertips, all I really needed to do was to find the people who wanted what I had to offer.

So I took that 5k, made a plan and invested it. In a training, and in advertising. By the end of the year, I multiplied my 5k times 20.

But it wasn’t quite the thing I wanted. I was still selling other peoples products for a commission. It was lucrative, but I was getting empty inside. Despite the way I was selling it, I had no passion for the particular products.

It became clear that I had to develop my own products, my own business again. Something that I deeply cared about and I loved to do.

So in 2012 I had another breakthrough moment and I decided to start creating my own training courses.

It was a decision that felt just right. Because I had found what I loved.

You have to keep going until you’ve found what you love. You know it in your gut, once you arrived. So keep looking.

Your Breakthrough Moments?

So, if you reflect back…

What were your breakthrough moments in life so far? What were key turning points, where you broke through inner or outer barriers and changed your life for the better?

Let me know in the comments below!

The post The 3 Breakthrough Moments Of My Lifetime appeared first on Myrko Thum.

This is where you can send me your questions and every Thursday I will pick one that I think is interesting for most people and answer it.

I already got hundreds from you (from those of you who signed up on my newsletter and typed in their question afterwards).

So here is the first one, and its an interesting one:

How Can I Stick to My Goals?

“I create goals in my mind every night. And every day I try to live them but I end up doing the exact opposite of what I want to do, and I don’t understand why. How can I stick to the personal goals I set for myself?”

“I end up doing the exact opposite of what I want to do…”

Interesting.

First of all, make sure that these goals are actually goals you really, REALLY want. Something with high long-term value. Only those are real goals.

Everything else is just something that would be nice to have today (and may be forgotten tomorrow).

Make it a few but important goals. If you have 20 goals, you basically have no goal. Because you just can’t keep your focus on that many goals.

You can find those goals by going through a proper goal-setting exercise.

If those are real goals you have, and you still have a hard time moving towards them…

I can tell you exactly why this happens.

One word: Fear.

You most likely fear the consequences of what happens when you reach your goals.

The fear of failure goes:

“What happens if I fail? What happens when my big dream won’t come true? What if I just don’t have what it takes? How disappointed and worthless will I feel?”

And the other side, the fear of success goes:

“What happens if I succeed? How will my life change? Am I really ready for that? What new challenges will come to me? Do I really want all that?”

The problem with fear is that it’s coming from the unconscious “reptilian” brain. And that might be in conflict with our conscious goal-setting.

The moment you get aware of your fear, you have a chance to overcome it.

Another word: Beliefs.

If you set goals that are in contrast to your beliefs and your values, you will get inner resistance.

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t set those goals.

On the contrary.

After all, compelling goals have the power to pull you towards a better life. That’s the power of goals: they work best if you really want to make a change.

Run a Check on Your Beliefs

What you can do is to get awareness about your beliefs.

For instance complete the following sentences:

“I want to reach my goal, but _________.”
“I haven’t reached my goal, because _________.”

Fill in the blanks and you will find some interesting limiting beliefs.

This is pretty powerful stuff. So do it!

And then you can even change your beliefs, so that they don’t limit you, but support you in your goal achievement. What a concept!

The third word: Habits.

When you set new goals that pull you out of your comfort zone and need you to form new habits, or give up old habits, you will feel resistance.

That’s something we call habit gravity.

The moment you start to form a new habit, your old habits that are in contrast to your new habits will pull you back down.

For instance when your goal is to start running every morning, you might do it the first 2 days. Then your old habit of sleeping longer will show his ugly face and resist the creation of your new habit.

So you have to escape this habit gravity. And that’s done by…

The last word: Focus.

You can radically improve your goal achievement if you learn how to focus your mind on your goals.

If you’ve set a powerful goal, a goal that is representing what you deeply desire inside, then your mental focus is your tool to make this goal your reality.

“The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.” ~ Stephen Covey [Tweet this!]

People think focus means to decide what to focus on. But in reality, this is not the main thing.

The main thing is to say no to all the things you could do, but which would distract you from your goal. To stay focus you need to learn to say no.

So learn stay focused on your goals and you’ve gone the next step.

The post How to Stick to Your Goals and Actually Reach Them appeared first on Myrko Thum.

Like the life you have worked so hard to create is not actually what you thought it was? You’ve worked really hard to achieve that place called success but now you are there it all feels rather empty and meaningless?

You’re not alone.

There has never been so many people in the world who have so much and yet it means so little.

I shall never forget the moment 25 years ago when I drove my brand new car (dream number one) up above the idyllic village where I lived (dream number two) and looked down on my thatched cottage with the rose over the door (dream number three) and thought about all the stuff I had (dream number four) and the amazing three holidays I took a year (dream number five) and realised just how empty it was (nightmare!).

I was furious!

I had worked so hard for so many years acquiring the life that I had been told would make me happy (get this, get that, do this, do that, and you’ll have made it) and I was miserable.

So many people I have worked with over the years tell a similar tale. However this moment of desperation was actually a great moment because it was in that specific moment that my life changed for the better. And this is true of anyone waking up and realising that there must be another way. There must be another way to be happy, feel like life has a meaning, contribute to the world.

And there is.

And, because I have been there done that and got the t-shirt I want to let you know about 4 mistakes that you can avoid to make your journey easier.

1. You don’t have to dump all the stuff

For some reason when people have this ah-ha moment that they can live life differently many people think that they have to get rid of all the stuff. They make the mistake of thinking that it is the ‘stuffs’ fault they are miserable.

Now the stuff I am talking about it all the material things we collect along the way. There might be big stuff like houses and cars and small stuff like gadgets and the next best updated whatsit.

The truth is it is actually ok to have this stuff in your life as long as you don’t tie in your self-esteem to it.

If you think that owning all this stuff is who you are then think again. You are far more than the external things you currently give value to.

Close your eyes for a moment and breath. Simply breath and notice your breath. Do this ten times.

In those few breaths your focus was not on anything external – it was on the inner you, the unchanging part of you. The part of you that existed before you were born and will exist after you die. This part of you needs no stuff to feel good – and neither do you.

However the cool thing is that once you understand this – practise this, reconnect with your heart and soul – then if you still want the stuff you can have it. When you no longer need it to feel good in your life then it has no hold on you and you can play with whatever you want.

2. Thinking that you have to change everything

You don’t.

I have worked over the years with many people who have come to me thinking they need to change their job to be happy. Over 50% of them never change their job.

Same with people who feel they need to change their relationship or lifestyle – or all three.

In truth the only change you can make that will make any difference is to change how you relate to yourself. [Tweet this!]

I have lived in the south of Spain for 13 years and seen many people moving down here in the hope that to come to a warm climate away from all the problems back home will make them happy. And for the first 6 months they are. Problem is that when they moved to the sun they brought themselves and all their problems with them.

Making a huge outer life change without a corresponding inner change will change nothing. [Tweet this!]

You need to understand what makes you tick, what makes your heart sing, what your true passions are – and learn to live by them.

For some of you it may be a whole life change, for others your outer life might not change at all but for both the inner connection is the key.

3. Getting stuck in the doing

Our western culture is very goal driven, we have to ‘do’ lots to achieve what we want. That has probably got you to where you stand today and the ability to ‘do’ is important. However it is not the be all and end all of life.

As you move through your life change you also need to learn to be. [Tweet this!]

A state of ‘being’ comes about when you are present to whatever is happening. Rather than letting your mind go crazy and plan the next three weeks you need to simply notice what is happening right here, right now.

My biggest tip would be this – learn to meditate, learn mindfulness. Meditation, contrary to popular opinion, is not about stopping thinking. You cannot stop thinking – to think about stopping thinking is thinking.

Rather it is about being watchful of your thoughts. It is about watching your thoughts but not getting caught up in them. The more your practise – and you can start with just 10 mins a day, the more you will move out of the energy of doing and into the energy of being.

The goal here is to do with the energy of being. [Tweet this!]

Contemplate that for a while.

4. Caring what others think

And lastly – when you start making changes in your life some people are going to think you’ve lost it.

They are going to point out the mistake you are making and try to get you to stop. They will be challenged by your new direction and do all in their power to get you to put the brakes on.

Learn this and learn it quickly – stop caring about what others think!

You cannot make heartfelt decisions based on what others think. [Tweet this!]

And, learn who you can share this journey with.

Find your cheer leaders – these are maybe two or three people on your life who will stand on the sidelines with the pompoms and cheer you on no matter what they think. They will support you if you flag and remind you why you wanted this in the first place. They are 100% on your side.

As for the others do not let them stop you, it is your life and you are a unique being with a unique life journey ahead of you. You had your wake-up moment, some part of you deep inside knows that this is the right way forward, it knows that all the outer stuff is no who you are, and if you learn to listen it will guide you through this whole amazing life changing journey.

You can change your mind and by definition change your life. [Tweet this!]

The post The 4 Biggest Mistakes People Make Changing Their Life appeared first on Myrko Thum.

In early 2013 I decided that I’m not going to waste my life as a walking dead banker. I’ve had enough.

I knew from day one that I don’t fit the banking environment. But it took me some time until I was ready to cut the crap.

I needed to figure out first how to get a business running while working in my 9 to 5 job.

Here’s what I’ve learnt!

Start Out Today

When I started my first “business” in 2012, I did everything wrong. I founded a corporation with a co-founder before we had a single paying customer. I programmed a fancy website before we had validated our idea. And when my partner chickened out, I didn’t have the balls to do it alone.

It was painful, but I learnt an invaluable lesson for my second business: You don’t need to found a corporation. You don’t need a fancy website. And for sure you don’t need a logo or business cards.

Start out and add value to someone’s life. That’s it. Work around all the unnecessary crap.

• You want to be an artist? Create remarkable art and offer it on eBay.
• You want to be a published author? Write a kick-ass book and self-publish it on Amazon.
• You want to be a consultant? Reach out to people and offer free consulting.
• You want to be a lifestyle entrepreneur? Start a legit blog and create a digital product.

You don’t need any fancy stuff. You can start creating value today. You might be a bloody nobody in your industry. But nobody can stop you from producing value and finding customer. Be ballsy and get your name out there!

Failure is Part of the Game

Are you scared that you might produce failures? You don’t need to be scared! Failures are part of the game.

I fail every other day with things that are new for me. Every entrepreneur I know fails at least once in a while with new tasks.

It’s aggressive trial and error. Or better: aggressive trial and optimization.

You make failures. You learn from it. You do it better the next time.

Accept that you will produce failure after failure as a beginner. It’s better to produce these failures while 9-5 is covering your ass.

Nothing bad can happen to you. You don’t believe me? Think about the worst case. What is the worst that can happen if you stay away from unnecessary crap and focus on adding value?

Let me help you: nobody wants your shit and you need to step up your game until it’s good enough.

Walk the Walk Before You Talk

While developing my exit plan, I made a huge mistake. I talked with everybody about my desire to leave banking. As a reward I received discouragement and doubts.

Talking about your plans is a dangerous play. Neither your colleagues, nor your friends will understand your plans.

Keep the door closed for negative and discouraging feedback. Walk the walk before you talk.

Start creating value today. Find your first customer. Earn some money. And then you can talk about your achievements.

If you can’t execute your plan without external advice, talk with an expert. An expert is a person who has already walked the walk; a person who is busy living the life of your dreams.

Prevent Breaking Along The Line

Leaving 9-5 behind will kick you in the face at least once in a while. It will be tough and stressful. It’s your duty to protect yourself from going bananas.

A daily morning routine will keep you healthy and vital. It won’t take you longer than 60 minutes. The benefits will be overpaying.

Take A Cold Shower: Taking cold showers will wake you up and blow your brain fog away. No matter how long you train cold showers, it will never become a pleasure. Doing it anyway will boost your discipline and willpower. It´s the perfect start into a new day.

Meditate for 20 minutes: Mediation is the single best tool to control your thoughts and emotions. It will train your brain to be present in the moment. It will calm your mind. And it will make you unreactive to whatever happens during the day.

Vegetable Shake: Shit in, shit out. Your diet has a major impact on your mental and physical well-being. A vegetable smoothie is an easy way to cover essential nutrients. Use different dark green vegetables, and some fruits for a better taste. I use Brussels sprouts, broccoli and some mango.

Read for 20 minutes: Read books from people who have already walked the walk in your industry. You will learn invaluable knowledge. You will gain the right mindset. And you’ll realize that your plans are not out of this world.

Stretching / Body weight exercises: Do some stretching and body weight exercises to end your routine. It will set a great rhythm for the day. And it will energize your body.

While working 9-5, I was performing this routine first thing in the morning before I went to work. It was a brilliant start to a new day. Today my daily routine includes about 15 activities.

Don’t Waste Valuable Time

Be aware: The following advice will not qualify you as employee of the year. But if you’re planning to quit anyway…

Use every free minute during your workday to research your industry. Reach out to people in your industry (use the web portal of your email provider, not your company account). Write and edit documents in Google docs. Be creative and do what it takes.

You don’t need to feel bad about it. As long as you still produce results, nobody gets hurt. All of your colleagues are wasting time surfing and reading the news. You’re just using your free time differently.

If you have the opportunity to work from your home office: go for it. Finish your daily tasks asap. Produce decent results to fly under the radar. Work the rest of the day on your own plans.

The Right Time to Quit

I quit before I had earned a single dime from my second business. I never cared about failing or taking risks. But that’s me.

You have three options:

1. Quit tomorrow

You’ll figure shit out. Your mind will produce. You will do what it takes to survive.

2. Quit after you’ve earned your first $

Start producing value, find your first customer, sell something, quit and scale. If you can find one customer, you can find ten. If you can find ten customers…

3. Quit after you can live from it

Produce value, find your first customer, sell something, scale it to a decent income and quit. It’s the slow but safe path.

It’s up to you!

You are the only one who knows how much pressure and risk you can take.

Summary

Working 9-5 is a tremendous opportunity for you. Use 9-5 to make your exit happen. Start creating value today, get your name out there, find your first customer, make failures and learn from it. The day when you’re ready to quit will come soon.

The post How to Quit Your 9 to 5 Job to Start Your Lifestyle Business appeared first on Myrko Thum.

For instance, my top 10 highest business values are:

1. Purpose
2. Integrity
3. Success
4. Helping/Inspire Change
5. Passion
6. Creativity
7. Focus
8. Clarity/Simplicity
9. Openness
10. Cooperation

So to do work that expresses these personal values is very important for me. Likewise it will be for you, so make sure you really know your personal values in the first place.

After all, your personal values are a defining part of your identity. At a core level they express what matters most to you—what you value most.

On the other hand you’ll notice it immediately when your work-environment is out of sync with your personal values. Have you ever felt this irritating mismatch when working for a certain company or client?

I certainly did.

That was the reason why I was switching what I did in the last 4 years over to what I do now. The values of the whole industry just felt wrong to me. So over time, I got frustrated more and more. On the surface it looked good. Money was good. And I was my own boss. But my emotions went south the longer I did it.

So in 2012 I made a couragous switch and decided to make my passion my business. Such a move needs a certain kind of risk-taking, but if you trust yourself and your inner voice that tells you what’s right for you, I believe not following that voice is the much higher risk. So by building up a new passion-business, I was able to totally align what I do with my personal values and what brings me the greatest job-satisfaction.

How to Express Your Core Values in Your Work?

If you are—like me—your own boss, this is the ideal situation. Because then you are free to inspire your business with your values. Of course you don’t want to get overboard with it by going against what your market and eventually your customer values. But if you’re doing it smoothly, you can match both.

If you’re working in a big company or a similar institution, you still have options. You can infuse your personal values into your own working environment, while still stay in alignment with the corporate values.

So in that case check the corporate values or simply ask. It can be very enlightening if you compare those with your personal values. If you find a good match, you probably find confirmation of what you already felt when working for this company. If you find a lot of mismatches, meaning the company values are something that you don’t value, then this shows you what you probably also already felt inside.

Aligning Your Work and Your Values

For me personally, this week I took the opportunity to change how this website looks like quite dramatically. If you are visiting me frequently you probably have noticed.

The value-based redesign of the site incorporates the following values:

1. Focus / Clarity / Simplicity

I tried to remove as much distraction as possible and focused the site on the core of why you are visiting it as well as my personal goals. I made each post the star of the page (after all that’s why you’re coming here), removed the sidebar (which isn’t showing on the growing number of mobile visitors anyway) and cleared everything up as much as it makes sense.

There is basically one call to action left and that is (as of this writing) me asking you to stay connected by joining my email list.

2. Helping / Inspire Change / Openness

Keeping your focus on the most important thing, the current topic of the post, should make providing inspiration to positive transformation and giving helpful advice more effective.

3. Success / Cooperation / Integrity

This year I also finally decided exactly what kind of services and products I want to create. So part of that is to offer only what I think is the best service I can provide on a larger level.

I don’t do advertising because that is a distraction for you and me and just ineffective to make a living from your passion. I do and offer my own stuff. If I would recommend other peoples work, I will make sure I keep integrity and I can stand behind those 100%.

Also I base my business and my business-relationships on integrity which means honesty, synergy and exchanging real value.

4. Purpose / Passion

Which brings me to my number one business value: purpose. Purpose is asking and answering why. Why are you doing what you do?

If you have found a strong enough reason for your existence and the vision and goals that flow from that reason, you are on the right track.

You will basically get an unlimited stream of energy, tap into your passion and feel this great feeling of fulfillment with what you do.

My purpose is to successfully help and inspire other people to transform with my personal strengths and creativity while growing myself and enjoying the process.

Maybe I can inspire you to define your purpose and then align it with what you do.

Conclusion: How to Do it?

So to infuse your work with what you value most,

1. Find out your own value hierarchy by creating your top 10 values here.
2. Think about how you can express your highest values in what you do.
3. Start making one change at your work to let your own values shine through.

This will increase your work-satisfaction and your fulfillment-level.

So, what are your personal values that you want to see come through in your work? Please let your thoughts flow freely in the comments below.

The post How to Let Your Personal Values Shine through in What You Do appeared first on Myrko Thum.

It’s just not happening…

But why?

And how can you fix this and get your motivation up when you need it? Like… right now?

Where the Heck is My Motivation?

Do a little exercise before you read on and ask yourself:

Why am I not motivated?

Asking the right questions in itself is a little self-reflection that can clear things up for you. If you like, write your answer in the comments below. Do it, it’s worth it.

We will come back to this question…

What is Motivation?

When you are motivated, you have a motive. In other words: a goal that drives you to take action.

Motivation is your inner driving force to close the gap between your goal and reality. [Tweet this!]

So motivation happens if you have a strong goal. But there is even more about motivation…

Your motivation is answering one single question. The most important question: Why? [Tweet this!]

If you have a strong enough reason—a big, BIG WHY—you will have all the motivation you’ll ever need. Your BIG WHY is this Driving Force.

So to answer the former question, let’s take a look at the core reason why we loose motivation:

The Core Reasons for No Motivation

What might come to your mind may be distraction. But distraction is no reason—it’s already a result. It’s the result of:

Reason 1: Lack of Clarity. If you are not clear on what you want it’s difficult to get motivated. Lack of clarity means you have no clear aim, no specific and compelling goal of where you want to go.

More precisely you are not connected emotionally to the great outcome that this goal can produce in your life. And the result is you’re not very motivated to take any kind of action.

Reason 2: Overwhelm. If you have too much “clutter” on the table you are overwhelmed and your focus gets fuzzy. This is no good environment for effective action. Instead it drowns your motivation. You need to simplify your life and learn to say no to things that are not truly  important to you.

Reason 3: Fear gets in your way. If you know clearly what you’re after—your goal—and you’re not overwhelmed anymore, there might still be something getting in your way: Fear.

Fear of failure, or even fear of success. You have to feel the fear and do it anyway, and develop ways to face your fears productively.

Reason 4: Negative Results. Let’s face it: If you tried very hard but come up short anyway, it can drag you down. Everybody feeds on little successes. We need positive reinforcement to build up positive momentum.

The 3 “Quick Fixes”

If you’re looking for an instant push in motivation, here are three powerful quick tricks:

1. Re-Connect Your Big Why

This is for re-igniting drive and putting new meaning into what you do:

1. Ask yourself Why: Why are you really doing this?
2. Uncover all the powerful reasons that got you started on your task in the first place. Then what else is a ultimate reason that will drive you to action?
3. Write all reasons down.

Notice how this clears the fog off your mind and gives you a strong sense of meaning.

2. The Vision Blast

This is something for the “dream big” type of person:

1. What is the most compelling, ideal outcome of your goal?
2. Got it? Good. Now close your eyes.
3. Visualize this outcome vividly in your minds eye. Make it big. Make it huge and colourful. See yourself achieving it. Feel how great it feels on all senses.

Do you feel a rush of motivation?
Great. Take action towards this outcome now!

3. The Check-Off

This is something for the “short-term gratification” type of person:

1. What one task—no big deal—a little thing that takes you towards your goal can you complete today?
2. Got it? Awesome. Now focus on this one little thing and get it done—no matter what.
3. Do just this little baby step and check it off your to-do list.

If you’ve done it, feel the sense of accomplishment and the starting build up in positive momentum.

You have a first success!

Now build on top of it from here.

4 Ways to Build Up Lasting Motivation

To really make a shift and experience long-term, ongoing motivation—like a constant undercurrent—in your life, you want to do some things more seriously:

1. Clarify Your Purpose. Motivation is not only dependent on compelling goals. If we digg deeper we’ll find out that the most motivated people are the ones who connect what they do with a deeper inner meaning.

Purpose is nothing else than your own ultimate reason of existence. You are exactly as motivated as you have a strong enough reason to be. So what’s your purpose? It’s not so much something you discover but rather something you define.

2. Do a Goal-Setting Workshop. If you’ve never done a goal-setting session in your life, start right now. Taken seriously and done right, it’s a really life-changing experience that can open up a new world for you.

I’ve written about goals a lot: especially here and here.

3.  Push through with Self-Discipline. Motivation and Discipline are opposites in the way that both help you to take action, but: If you are motivated you have a strong positive reason to do something. And you’re feeling it right now—in the moment. You are motivated. You’re rocking it. Life is great.

The definition of self-discipline to act whether you feel like it or not. [Tweet this!]
In other words, you take action even when you’re not feeling motivated.

So if you want to close the gap and use self-discipline to get going again, I’ve written about it in my tiny guide to self-discipline as well as here and here.

4.  Do One Step. Motivation often comes when we do something. Not the other way around. So use this to start building some small positive momentum.

Develop the habit of going baby-steps: One tiny little step at a time, like a little baby does when it learns to walk.

As I said we all need little successes. It gives us this positive feeling of accomplishment. So if you can develop the habit to just “Do One Step”, you’re starting to make progress. First slow, then faster.

Success is the succession of small steps into the right direction. [Tweet this!]

Small successes over time build a huge success. Start now!

The post The Small Guide to Get Motivated w/ 3 “Quick Fixes” to Use Right Now appeared first on Myrko Thum.

But not having this skill can seriously sabotage your best efforts to get things done and to move towards your goals in life.

The skill I’m talking about is to say no — primarily in your mind — to everything that is not what you really want.

Sure there are a gazillion opportunities out there waiting for you to jump on them. There is so much information and advice waiting to devour your attention. And of course, there are dozens of things on your to-do list waiting to get checked off.

But what is the one thing that is all about you?

What one thing is expressing your core dream?

Absolute Clarity

Saying no in your mind doesn’t mean becoming ignorant. Instead saying no helps to purify of your mind. It clears the fog and makes space for what is more important.

Saying no means clarity. [Tweet this!]

Clarity.

This is just a word, but have you ever experienced how this really feels?

When you a 100% certain that this is it. This is the thing you want to do — nothing else. It’s a beautiful situation to be in.

It’s that kind of clarity that empowers you in every action you take.

Because you just know. You don’t have to think and ponder and search for new ways. You just know your way, and you just go it.

Of course, this presupposes that you also really know what you want. Otherwise, there would be confusion. Because there would just be a big question mark in that space where your BIG YES should be ;-)

What is Your Big Yes?

When we take a look at time management there are two fundamental questions for every single task:

1. Is this urgent now?
2. And is this really important to me? (as in your #1 priority)

Regardless of how you answer the first question, eventually you only want to spend your time on to-dos where you answer the second question with yes.

Time management often seems complicated. But at it’s core, it all comes down to this one single thing:

You only want to spend your time on what is really important to you. [Tweet this!]

This is the essence of clarity.

And it sounds easy, but in reality it’s not. Because in reality it can be difficult to distinguish between urgent and important.

Separate the Urgent from the Important

For instance we have everything that you say is important, but it’s not. That means there is a tendency in all of us to rationalize things to be important, when in reality they are either one of two things:

1) an escape (its really neither important, nor urgent)
2) an illusion (of importance, because it is urgent)

So when it comes to being productive in your working time (not necessarily in your spare time), you want to eliminate these two.

CURE 1)

The first is what we call procrastination.

We know that we’re escaping, but we still do it somehow.

And the solution to this is to have a strong enough why. A strong reason, a goal that drives us forward — even through fear — because it’s so compelling.

CURE 2)

And when you’re faced with a lot of tasks that are not important, but seem pressing, urgent… then it’s finally time for you to say no to them.

Imagine… if you could eliminate half of the tasks you have on your to-do list right now, by finally realising that these are actually not important to you.

So ask yourself these critical question:

1. Is what I do right now having a long-term impact for reaching my goal?
2. If yes, is this my #1 priority right now?

The post Say No — to Say Yes to What Matters appeared first on Myrko Thum.

We create a plan, work really hard to achieve it, and in the end sometimes find ourselves with nothing left to show but sweat and maybe a few tears.

This is fine.

In fact, this is a wonderful process that we can learn from.

However, I’m going to be realistic and just say that failure does not feel like a wonderful process by any means. It is often painful and can damage our egos. But it gives us something to learn from.

In this article I’m going to explain my mindset on failure and how you can start feeling great even when you fail.

Understand Deeply That Failure is Necessary

One of the first beliefs to internalize is that failure is absolutely necessary.

It is impossible to succeed without making mistakes. Success is not the opposite of failure. Success is simply on the opposite side of the coin from failure. Remember that success results from many failures. Rarely do many successes come from one failure.

Let me illustrate this point.

Do you remember what it was like to learn to ride a bike as a kid? I seriously doubt many people got it their first time. On the other hand, I am fairly certain that there were a lot of scraped knees and bruises along the way. Only after repeatedly trying did we finally learn to ride the bicycle without hurting ourselves. Success was a result of repeated failure.

Of course, this is an easy thing to do as a kid. Our egos are not quite so developed by that point.

Failure is merely a result that did not go as intended. [Tweet this!]

It is not a blow to who we are as successful people. So one characteristic of children is that they fail spectacularly. Notice that they are also spectacular learners. They grow and change more in a few years than most adults do their entire lives. This is no coincidence.

Understanding that failure is necessary is only the first part of the formula. The second involves the real work, and is something that can’t simply be learned – it must be practiced.

Maintain Your Vision in the Sight of Failure

This is what separates the weak from the tough.

It is easy to intellectually understand that failure is an important aspect of growth. This is not new by any means. But to hold on to that understanding while your world is crashing around you takes true guts. And that’s what I want to convey in this section.

As with all things in life, try to smart small.

Try to maintain your internal vision the next time you fail on a small level.

An example of this might be a dinner date you were supposed to keep. Suppose you had plans with someone and really, truly intended to be there. And then something came up. And you did your best but could not make it. You might feel a little guilty for breaking plans with your friend. You might feel like, even though you did your best, you still failed on some level. This is good.

This is when you practice maintaining your vision.

You had a goal: to go to dinner with your friends. Something came up, but you did your best to deal with it. So it was not your fault that the plans fell through. Sometimes, life happens. Next time you’ll be more prepared for unforeseen circumstances. You have learned from the event. Rejoice!

Practice the Process

Now let’s take this process and try it with something larger.

Suppose that your intent was to find a suitable long term partner. And suppose that, in the end, it just didn’t work out. You made some mistakes and they made some mistakes. Ultimately you found out that you and your would-be partner were simply not compatible. If this were a years-long relationship then you might feel a profound sense of failure. Perhaps even more so if you were married and had children. Now, let’s apply the process.

What was your goal?

To find a long term partner.

Did you do your absolute best to make it work?

Chances are that you did. You may not have always acted your best – who does? – but if you really wanted it then I am sure that you put quite a lot of effort into the goal.

Here comes the distinction in how a normal person might view the event and how a mature, effective person would view the event. Ask yourself,

“Can I do anything right now that will change what has happened?”

If you are at the end of a relationship then the answer is almost always a strong no. Secondly, ask yourself,

“What can I learn from the events leading up to my failure?”

The first question is a very popular one. The second question is often very rare.

If you are an astute observer you will find that you can learn a lot from almost any failure. That’s the magic of it. If you failed, then you did not do something right. Now it is time to try something new.

On the other hand, success teaches you very little. You simply did something that worked. You can continue to do what works but you won’t necessarily grow from it. Instead, choose to challenge yourself and learn.

Yes, it will hurt a little up front, but you’ll be much richer in the long run because of it. Learn to love to fail.

The post Why I Love to Fail appeared first on Myrko Thum.

“Often when one is asleep, there is something in consciousness which declares that what then presents itself is but a dream” ~ Aristotle

Have you ever been immersed within a dream, when you realise that you’re dreaming? Have you ever felt able to control your actions or the events within a dream? Many people will have experienced this on the odd occasion at random, but it is also possible to learn to do this on a regular basis.

Why Lucid Dreaming?

The phenomenon of being aware that you are dreaming whilst having a dream is referred to as lucid dreaming.

A lucid dream will allow you to explore your own mind and gain insight into your psyche. Additionally, the ability to control a dream will open up a new world of possibilities, allowing you to achieve the impossible in your dreams; flying being a good example.

Below is a list of the benefits individuals have reported from experimenting with lucid dreaming:

1. Face your fears

Most of us will have experienced a nightmare or two, often revolving around our deepest fears. Unaware that we are dreaming, these nightmares can be absolutely terrifying, leaving a lasting and unwelcome impact.

Unlike a nightmare, within a lucid dream you are aware that you are dreaming. This allows you to recognize that you are completely safe, and are therefore able to face your fears in a controlled environment.

Whether you’re afraid of public speaking, spiders, flying or heights, you can explore this fear within a lucid dream, which may help you to ultimately overcome it.

2. Unlock your creativity

Have you ever awoken from a dream and thought, “where on earth did that come from?”

A lucid dream allows you to explore the inner workings of your subconscious, unlocking ideas that you might never have known were in there. James Cameron, the director of Avatar, has stated that much of his inspiration for the movie came from lucid dreams. Additionally, many inventors, such as Nikola Tesla, have cited lucid dreams as influencing their creative mind.

3. Realise your dreams

Many of us have dreams that may never be realized, such as flying or visiting outer space.

Personally, I’ve always been fascinated by space, and have dreamt of visiting the Sun and the Stars. I’m aware that this isn’t going to happen in my lifetime, but it’s something that I can experience in my lucid dreams.

If you’re lucky, then lucid dreams will allow you to act out your dreams and fantasies. 

My Experiences with Lucid Dreaming

I came across the topic of lucid dreaming a few years ago, whilst searching for coping techniques for anxiety.

The techniques that I found to be the most beneficial to me were deep relaxation and meditation, both of which are closely linked to lucid dreaming. Intrigued by the information I had discovered, I began following some ‘How to Lucid Dream’ strategies.

To be honest, nothing happened for me at first, but I persevered and within a few months I experienced my first lucid dream. From the dream, I remember the ability to take in my surroundings – I was able to consciously analyze the dream whilst it was happening!

Since then I have had a couple more and they are gradually becoming clearer. So far, I have found lucid dreaming to be a fun adventure, and one that has given me an insight into my own mind. I don’t feel that it has had any particular impact on my anxiety as yet, but it’s definitely been an eye-opening and worthwhile experience.

3 Lucid Dreaming Techniques

Below I have explained some simple and effective lucid dreaming techniques.

Technique 1. Reality Checks

This may seem like a very simple method, but it is something very few of us will do on a regular basis.

Firstly ask yourself “Am I dreaming?”

Don’t just say it, think about it. Look around yourself and notice everything about your environment. Feel the objects around you, such as the chair you are sitting on.

You will then come to the conclusion “I am awake!”

However, by practicing this whilst awake you are more likely to perform it during sleep. Often people dream about things that regularly happen in real life and if you practice reality checks regularly throughout the day then you will eventually experience them during sleep. When you perform this in a dream, you will realize that you are dreaming and you’re dream will become lucid.

Here’s an example of somebody who found reality checks to work wonders:

“It was all down to the effort, and I suppose the excitement too. I very badly wanted to Lucid Dream, so the fact it was constantly on my mind helped a lot.

It was a short time of lucidity, but it was amazing. I was in my room, I realized it was a dream after looking at my light switch and remembering that there was a Reality Check related to a light switch.

Anyways, I just jumped around the room a bit (jumping in a way that verges on flying), then I went to climb out my window, and the excitement just woke me up.” (Source)

Technique 2. Memory/Recall

Did you have a lucid dream last night, or the night before?

You may say no…but how do you know for sure?

The problem is we often don’t remember our dreams and they become harder to remember as the day draws on. Remembering your dreams more clearly can be learnt if practiced regularly.

The first thing that can be done is to keep a dream journal. Write in it every morning (immediately upon waking), even if you can only remember a feeling or a place. As you practice this regularly you will start to remember your dreams in greater detail.

Technique 3. Immersion

It is likely that you will dream about the experiences you have had during the day. Your dreams will be influenced by the movies you watch, books you read and the conversations you have!

If you are thinking about lucid dreaming, reading about it and talking about it, then it is much more likely that it will transfer into your dreams.

By practicing these techniques regularly, you should find that having lucid dreams becomes a common fixture in your life.

The post The 3 Most Effective Techniques to Experience Lucid Dreaming appeared first on Myrko Thum.

In a time when most people in Scotland were willing to settle, Wallace wanted more for himself and for his people. Getting there was something that probably seemed impossible, to win freedom from a ruthless king probably seemed insurmountable.

There has been some debate about the accuracy of the movie but one line in the movie really caught my attention. At one point in the movie the nobles ask Wallace what he’ll do next, he tells them he’ll invade England.

They laugh and tell him it’s impossible, he then says:

“Why? Why is that impossible? You’re so concerned with squabbling for the scraps from Longshank’s table that you’ve missed your God given right to something better.”

Wow!

This may just be a line from movie but the sad thing is that this is how most people live their lives, they’re content with the scraps and completely ignore their right to a better life.

Whether it’s working at a job you hate, living in a place that makes you miserable or looking at yourself in the mirror and not recognizing yourself.

Whether it’s a life of regret and unfulfilled dreams or too many times you’ve listened to all those doubts and fears. The bottom line is we settle instead of soaring.

This is Who I was…

For 12 years of my life, this was how I lived. I believed all my doubts and fears, I made every excuse in the book. I believed all those people that told me it wasn’t possible, I believed the ones that told me I didn’t have enough education.

I was content to just pretend instead of listening to what I knew my heart was screaming at me:

Don’t settle!

Once I woke up like William Wallace and could finally “see it”, a major shift happened in my mind that lead to where I’m at today.

I went from delivering bread at midnight for 12 years to self-publishing two ebooks that sold over 80,000 copies, the second ebook got picked up by a publisher and hit book stores this past May. I started speaking and in the last two years spoke at conferences in 12 states and 10 countries.

I’m now completely supported by a location independent, freedom based online business and on April 8th of this year, our family is following a life-long dream and moving to Hawaii!

I don’t know where you’re at in your life right now but I’m guessing seeing it and believing it is something that you might be dealing with right now.

Don’t settle

Life is far to short to settle.

We’re not guaranteed anything and time is something we’ll never get back, so why waste it on regret? Why waste it doing things that we don’t really want to do, living a life someone else thinks we should live?

Go after all those dreams and passions! Don’t hold them inside anymore!

No matter where you’re at, no matter what’s going on, you can make your dream life your real life.

You Deserve So Much More

We are all destined for amazing things, we just never fully realize it or believe it.

I know many that read this blog want to add value, want to help people get through difficult situations, have a passion to make this a better world.

You can do it!

You deserve to be happy, you deserve an incredible life but it’s up to you to claim it and make it a reality.

Take Action, Claim the Life You Truly Deserve

At the end of the day you have to take action on your passion, you have to chase those dreams before they can become a reality. Everywhere you look, you’re seeing stories about how New Years Resolutions don’t work.

Yes, most people do give up but you don’t have to be most people.

This is my development last year.

I set five main resolutions last year and in the end I lost 133 pounds, ran 658 miles, travelled to 6 countries to speak, became completely supported by my online business, and our family got one-way tickets for our Hawaii move.

Was I going hard all year to hit these goals? NO!
Did I quit, make excuses, fail? YES!

The key is I got back up and kept pushing forward. So, if you set some resolutions/goals and fall down, get back up.

Don’t listen to what others tell you what is right for you, don’t give them that power. Determine what YOU want to accomplish this year and go after it with everything you’ve got. If you fall down or get frustrated, lick your wounds, get back up and keep pushing forward. This is YOUR year!

What are some big, hairy goals you’re setting this year?

The post Don’t Settle for Less than You Truly Deserve. Ever. appeared first on Myrko Thum.

Is it something in your professional life like a new job, starting your own business, raise your income-level or improve something in your health?

Or is it something personal like a being a more positive- or result-oriented person? Or a improvement in your relationship? A new relationship?

Every end is also always the beginning of something new. And to make the most out of it, start out by reflecting back on your last year first.

What are you thankful for?
What were your personal the milestones and breakthroughs last year?

And then decide consciously where you want to go. 

Bring up the courage to step out of your comfort zone for challenge yourself to grow this year!

My Personal 2013

In 2013 I personally reached a lot of very defining milestones.

Among the most important ones were the birth of my 2 daughters, my marriage and also the launch of my coaching course The System.

I also wrote a lot about personal growth, productivity and this year also about money here on this blog.

So without further ado, here are…

My Very Best Posts of 2013:

Feel free to be inspired and to use these insights to make your 2014 the best you can…

To be more productive:

• Start with #1 — my best productivity habit
• Stuck? Just Move on with Your Next Best — here is how to get unstuck and move forward
• No Time? My Best 10 Hacks to Have More Time for You — to improve how you invest your time
• The TOP 5 Productivity Killers – And How to Bust Them — Understand time-management by seeing how it works in day in and day out

To be more financially aware:

• Why Personal Development is the Best Investment You’ll Ever Make — investing in yourself first always pays off
• The Big Picture Guide to Get Control Over Your Money — the money mindset (without it you will fail financially)
• The 10 Most Limiting Beliefs About Money (& How to Remove Them) — remove your mental financial blockers

To master difficult times:

• What to Do When Life Sucks — get out of any rut
• You Are Enough. — nothing can shake your own self-worth
• The Little Guide to Face Your Fears — face your fears to defeat your fears
• How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others and Overcome Jealousy — free yourself to be yourself

To grow personally:

• What is the Purpose of Your Life? — why are you here on this earth?
• Do You Know Your Personal Values? — the core part of your personality
• What Are Your Personal Strengths and Weaknesses? — what makes you strong? (and what not)
• The 3 Ways to Find Your Voice — what are you uniquely qualified to do?

Happy New Year to You!

The post Start Your New Year with my Best Posts from 2013 appeared first on Myrko Thum.

“From out of all the many particulars comes oneness, and out of oneness comes all the many particulars.” -Heraclitus

Life is like a spider-web, everything is connected in some way or another. When you step away from a job or a career into a completely new chapter of life, it is easy to feel like you have wasted the last how-ever-many years of your life.

There is no doubt that what Richard Branson learned when he just started off selling budgies as a business transferred over to his other mega successes. Likewise what Gordon Ramsey learned in his early career as a soccer player was able to be applied in the kitchen — as unlikely as that may seem.

If you have recently quit a career or a thinking about quitting in order to pursue your dream — remember that there is always a baby in the bathwater, there is always something to take away from each experience. They may not apply specifically toward your new career, but they most certainly will teach you something about life. In my careers as a professional chef, athlete, teacher, and speaker, here are the biggest lessons I have learned in life.

Lesson 1: Under-Promise and Over-Deliver

In cooking, menus would always take longer to prepare than planned.

Research has also showed us that as humans, we are terrible with overestimating and over-planning our tasks and abilities in relation to time. In order to provide myself a safety net when working, I would never provide the guests with the completed menu- I would still provide a very elegant menu, just left off any extra sides that I really wanted to make but was afraid of not making the set time for lunch.

The principle is this: it is always a huge let-down if you do not deliver on a commitment, it is far better to not make a commitment, and then surprise them with whatever you end up delivering.

In short, It is always better to under-promise and over-deliver, than to over-promise and under-deliver! [Tweet this!]

Lesson 2: Losing is not Failure, But a Stepping Stone

In 4 years of Muay Thai, and 2 years of boxing, the greatest lesson I learned is that nothing drives you like defeat.

I can clearly recall the times where I was getting stitched up and sticking tissues up my newly broken nose. Talk about being in despair.

Funny enough, those times of sitting there in pain were perhaps the most powerful; to reflect on all the hard work that I went through to even get me to the fight, to remind myself that I had left my comfort zone of living in Australia and moved to Thailand to live the dream.

It reminded me that life was not only about the destination, but also about the journey. [Tweet this!]

Losing was not a failure, rather a stepping stone. More often than not, you learn more from a loss than a win.

Lesson 3: Your Belief Will Move Mountains

From the ring to the classroom, I had never challenged my mind and intellect in the context of academics before.

Having always wanting to get a Bachelors degree, unfortunately, I was told a lot growing up that I was just not a brainy kid — words are powerful, and they stuck with me for a long time.

Thankfully, I had come to a place in life of really embracing “faith.” Believing. Surrendering myself over to something much greater than myself and opening myself up to the possibility that anything was possible.

It is hard to put into words the power of belief, the mindset shift that happens with the conscious decision to believe that anything is possible turns life from black and white in 3D color.
(see related: Change Your Mindset by Changing Your Limiting Beliefs)

Regardless of what it is in life that you desire to accomplish, an unwavering faith and belief will move mountains! [Tweet this!]

What are some of the life lessons you have taken away from different careers?
Go ahead and share with the readers!

The post Skool of Hard Knocks: 3 Life Lessons from Cooking, Kickboxing & College appeared first on Myrko Thum.

“We become what we repeatedly do.” –  Sean Covey

I will exercise regularly.
I will wake up early.
I will lose that weight.
I will eat more healthy.
…

How many times have you started something like this only to realise that you never finish doing it? How many times have you tried to eat more greens only to fall back to having none at all? Or perhaps start exercising more only to stop three weeks into the program?

I would have to admit, I’m guilty of them and being a person in the fitness industry, I see it every single day how habits are formed and ultimately wasted.

It’s not anyone’s fault though, and to simply say that one is not motivated enough that’s why it fails is not enough. Through my years of coaching and training, I have gathered some reasons to why we fail to finish off what we started.

Making yourself known to these reasons can play a huge part in your success in making a good new habit stick.

Why Habits Don’t Stick

Starting a habit is easy. It’s not difficult to start eating well or exercising more. But finishing off what you started requires more than just the initial motivation and pump. As much as it is important to just go and do it, sticking to your habits requires serious willpower.

When I was trying to lose weight for the first time, I failed badly. Not only did I fail to stick to my plan, I ended up putting more weight than I lost. I came to a realisation that things didn’t work to my advantage for three simple reasons.

1. I was doing a lot of things at once. Having the will to lose weight is hard enough, and yet I chose to juggle that with exercising six times a week, eating better and going to college. I underestimated the fact that it was going to take more time if I were to do so many things at once.

2. I was doing something that required a lot of love and attention. Losing weight takes time and of course effort. I had the drive to achieve all my goals but I wasn’t focused enough in achieving them, so I took it for granted.

3. I had no strategy. I just simply want to lose weight and I was ready to take in any information from any source without even thinking if it will work for me.

If this example sounds familiar to you then it’s okay, I’ve been there. And today we are going to change that.

Your Willpower — Use It on Purpose

The one very important thing to remember about willpower is that we only have a limited amount of it. If we keep using it every single day without any plan, direction or purpose, or if we do too many things at one go, we will end up losing it. What this simply means is that, the more difficult the task is, the more willpower we have to use and the lesser willpower we’ll have for other things.

Which was what happened to me the first time I was trying to lose weight.

How to Build a New Habit that Sticks

1. Do something according to your ability.

If you’ve never stepped out for a run in the longest time and wake up one morning wanting to run a half-marathon in 3 months, you’re not doing yourself any good. Identify the level you’re at right now and work at building up your momentum.

If you want to start exercising more, start by doing simple bodyweight exercises for ten minutes a day. Even trying to go out and run for thirty minutes could kill your willpower. If you want to try and sleep better, start by going to bed five minutes earlier than your usual timing for a week and build it up from there. Momentum is king.

2. Pick one habit at a time and do it repeatedly.

It’s much easier to tackle one big bad guy than 10 of them. That said, it’s easier to change one habit and channel all the energy you’ve got to that change rather than splitting your willpower to five different habits. It may take you a year to give up a bad habit but every step counts. If you’re having 10 cups of coffee every day now, drop it down to 9 tomorrow. By the end of the year, you’ll probably only need 1 cup of coffee every Friday.

3. Don’t do it alone.

I personally believe that surrounding yourself with people who are going through the same thing as you is far more valuable than going through a change alone. Go to chat groups or message boards. Find a buddy who is willing to see you through difficult times. Make known to people who has done it before you – they’re usually inspiring and motivating.

4. Have a strategy.

You wouldn’t walk into an important meeting without proper planning, would you? This is is especially important if you’re trying to tackle something you have never done before, for example, exercising. Have a plan and stick to it. I also find that the things that requires the most willpower is better done earlier in the day. If you don’t know what time is best to exercise, do it first thing before life gets in the way. That way you can’t come up with excuses not to do it.

Although it is a matter of personal preference, small things like this do count in ensuring your success to build habits that stick.

Here’s to You…

Picking up a new habit is great no matter what they are. There will be times when it seems tougher than other days and that’s completely normal. Try to understand these three things and you’ll be alright.

1. Understand that you are in control. If you decide to do something which doesn’t take you to your new habits, you have to understand that it was your conscious decision, not because you had to do it.

2. Understand that it takes time and it is challenging. Nothing worth having comes easy and Rome wasn’t built in the day. Stick to your action plans, practice self-discipline and soon enough you will achieve your new habit.

3. Understand that what you want out of the new habit (e.g. feel healthier, happier etc.) cannot happen if you keep settling on what you want right now (e.g. smoking).

Get rid of all your negative thoughts, conquer your fears and believe that you can make a change. Habits takes months and sometimes years to reverse but it can be done. Think again on why you started and repeatedly tell yourself that if you feel powerless. Just know that you can make a change that does not only stick for now, but for the rest of your life.

Your Turn…

What are you doing today to change a habit and stick to it?

Are you going to start something only to give it up soon after?

Remember that habit takes time, it is what we repeatedly too. Don’t give up too easily and your willpower will strengthen over time because you know it will. And we all deserve that personal growth in us.

Now tell me: Have you adopted a new habit recently and what strategies do you use to ensure your success?

Share your thoughts with the community in the comment box below. I would love to hear them.

The post How to Make a New Habit Stick — And Finish Off What You’ve Started appeared first on Myrko Thum.

I personally develop the tendency to ignore things in order to keep at least a little control over what is my primary focus. But ignorance is always a poor master.

Don’t Give Up!

I urge you not to give up on your highest expectations!

Don’t lower your standards and accept a life that is not truly satisfying you. Don’t accept bad compromises. Don’t accept mediocrity.

That’s not the way. And it’s not working, neither.

Remember this: You can never cheat on yourself! [Tweet this!]

…and talk yourself into accepting a life that is “OK.” expecting to be happy. It’s the path to dullness — a path to an uninspired, uncreative life.

Keep up the inner fight. And fight for the win.

The Reward is Worth It

Because the reward is not only a life truly worth living, but first and foremost it is that inner emotional reward that’s worth the fight.

When you feel proud of yourself. When you feel alive again. When your life flows full of energy.

Then you have the right ideas, take the right actions.

The only reason you are here is to shine! Everything else is secondary. [Tweet this!]

That means to be at your best. To give, to love, to grow, to contribute, to inspire and to enjoy.

But that only comes when you don’t settle. When you don’t give in to the pressure of mediocrity. When you keep up and actually live by your own high standards. When you demand more from yourself than anybody else is asking from you.

How to Stay on Top of Your Life

I personally just went through a stage where I was overwhelmed. There where a lot of events going on (just to name my marriage, the birth of our twins and the creation and launch of The System) that demanded more from me.

What what I learned again was that I just must not accept the wrong compromise. I must not mitigate. I must not accept a feeling of being out of control, of not having the inner space to stay calm, of being overwhelmed, of not being on top of my life.

What I have to do instead is to grow and find the way to get back into consciously directing my life and keeping my highest standards up.

What especially worked well for me was adjusting some of my beliefs, especially about comfort and self-discipline.

Self-Discipline Gives You Freedom

When you understand that self-discipline will give you the freedom you’re so desperately longing for, you start to see what you will get from it, instead of what is costs you.

Self-discipline is the kind of quality that helps you everywhere. Then you can be sure that you will actually follow through with what you say to yourself. This is true power — and a reason to feel good about yourself.

And —as I said in the Tiny Guide already— the best thing is to keep the emotional win of the end-result in mind.

So understand self-discipline as a part of yourself, of your core values, and not as something you always have to fight with. That’s the real switch.

Comfort is Not Quality of Life

On the other hand, I experienced again that comfort is not a quality of my life. And especially no quality that makes my life easier. 

Living a comfortable life can lead very easily to staying in your comfort zone.

You need to accept and raise to the demands your life is giving you.

Demands are there for a reason. And the reason is for you to grow. [Tweet this!]

The post How to Go from Comfort to Self-Discipline and Never Settle for a Life of Mediocrity appeared first on Myrko Thum.