Some sex experts say that your most potent—and most underutilized—sex tool is your voice. Asking each other these Best Questions, along with your own personal questions, will get you started on rekindling sexual desire. You’ll learn how your partner feels, what he or she wants, and how to make each other happy.

1. How can we best communicate with each other about our needs for sex and intimacy?
Women tend to romanticize sex and intimacy, while men are more likely to have a body-centered or recreational approach to sexual encounters. These natural differences between men and women explain why talking about sex and intimacy can be tricky. In their book Intimacy after Cancer: A Woman’s Guide, Sally Kydd and Dana Rowett comment, “Men don’t ask for directions and don’t read instructions… even for sex. Just show us the parts, and we’ll put it together.”

Your best communications on sex might be using no words at all. Perhaps having some signals or a couple of phrases can serve as “code” for when one of you is feeling amorous. Working out your personal preferences and communication styles in advance can help smooth out misunderstandings and clarify expectations.

2. Are you comfortable being intimate again?
It’s possible that nothing can prepare either of you for the shock of what your chest looks like after surgery. Examine and touch the scars together to help you both adjust to the physical changes. Scars will heal over time and become less red and raw looking. If you engage in sex, the partner may fear hurting the patient during lovemaking. Talk with the patient about the sexual positions that are the most comfortable for her. The partner should also ask the patient about possible pain caused by vaginal dryness after chemotherapy or hormonal changes.

3. How can we redefine and restart our intimacy and sexual pleasure again?
Let’s face it. A cancer journey is a long, hard haul for both of you. Chemotherapy is a drag, and so are radiation therapy and hormonal therapy. The patient is tired, stressed out, and may be suffering from side effects like nausea, pain, or lymphedema.

Even though the partner understands this at one level, it’s also quite common for the partner to still feel rejected, resentful, and drained from his or her caregiving demands. Here are some suggestions for things to try from experts in cancer and sexuality:

—Enjoy a romantic candlelit dinner.
—Offer a long sensual massage.
—Watch an erotic video together.
—Try new sexual positions.
—Book a romantic vacation or quick get-away trip.

4. For the partner to ask: What do you want to tell me about the physical changes in your body?
This is a very direct question about a topic many couples avoid discussing. Women may hesitate to share their pain or feelings about their new appearance, fearing they will alienate their partners. Male partners may be reluctant to discuss the woman’s physical changes because it’s a constant reminder of how powerless they have been to “fix the cancer,” a nearly universal male reaction.

5. What can I do to please you?
Become dedicated to recapturing mutual pleasure for you and your partner. Sex is fun and pleasure is good medicine for the patient—and for your relationship.

6. What’s the craziest or funniest thing we could do to show our love for each other?
Rediscover your passion by having fun together. Go from boring or scared to blissful in the bedroom. Be creative with your passion and direct it toward your partner with a renewed fire. Nurture it. Enjoy and revel in it. You are alive.

7. Is there anything off-limits now that was okay before?
If you don’t ask each other this question, your unspoken assumptions about what’s acceptable and what isn’t can lead to major misunderstandings. Be clear about your limits and nonjudgmental about your partner’s desires. Talk this question out without criticism or bringing up your past sexual or marital problems.

8. We agree we both have a low interest in sex right now. What can we do to get back on track?
This Best Question is for circumstances when you both have a low sex drive and agree that this is a shared situation. You may end up agreeing that neither of you wants to resume sexual relations for a while. This might be your new definition of “back on track,” but at least you’ve made sure you both agree with it.

9. We can’t agree about having sexual relations or being intimate. How can we work it out?
Keep in mind that even if your sexual desire is reduced or absent it’s still possible to be a good lover. During this time, you still can be physically intimate without sexual intercourse through kissing, touching, stroking, cuddling, hugging, massaging, or sharing loving words.

10. Do we need professional help?
Sexual problems create emotional problems and vice versa. You may want to talk to a professional therapist or counselor, ideally as a couple. There are many professionally trained specialists who deal with intimacy and sexuality issues for cancer patients and their partners. Ask an oncology social worker or a nurse navigator for a referral. Some large cancer care centers have specialists connected to their facility.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

I started playing a little game with myself to see how a baby would fit into our lives. Throughout the day I asked myself, “If we had a baby right now, what would we be doing?” Could I still go swimming? Could we take her to brunch? When I woke up to use the bathroom at 5 a.m., I thought, “If I had to get up right now and couldn’t go back to bed, would I mind?” On Sunday nights when Paul was working at his computer and I had finished watching Big Love, I wished I could help a child get ready for bed: chasing her down the hall after a bath, reading her stories or negotiating which stuffed animals she could have in her crib. I imagined Paul and me sneaking in to check on her while she slept, swelling with pride that we had made such a beautiful child together. The child-free books promised a life of order, but I was starting to choke on all our peace and quiet. I craved noise.

I didn’t want to miss out on everything for fear of sacrificing my freedom or enduring a few sleepless nights. I wanted it all: sullen teenagers, tantrum-throwing toddlers, social studies homework, messy schedules, and babies crushing Cheerios on the floor. I’d been on enough trips. I’d sat through enough long dinners. I’d slept in enough weekends. I knew that even with kids, I’d still be able to do those things sometimes. I knew the years would fly by, and I would have decades left for more child-free living full of convenience, condos, and cheese plates.

Sometimes I felt hurt that Paul couldn’t tolerate the inconvenience of one little baby, even if it meant losing me—that he would rather have none of me than share me with a child. But I realized it had nothing to do with me. Even though Paul would be an amazing father, he didn’t want to be one. Just as I couldn’t argue myself out of a need, I couldn’t convince him of a desire. And I had run out of years to try.

Sometimes I wondered whether I was choosing a baby who did not exist over an actual man who was here now and made me deliriously happy. It felt as if I were choosing which limb to cut off. If I thought about losing Paul, it hurt. If I thought about losing Claire, it hurt. But I knew I didn’t really have a choice. If I stayed with Paul and didn’t honor my desire to have a child, I would grow to resent him. No experience with him could win in that kind of contest, and no requited love could survive unrequited baby hunger; in the end, I’d have neither husband nor child.

And just like that, I made a decision: I wanted a husband and a family. The baby panic rushed back, but this time it wasn’t the old hyperventilating variety. It was the helpful, encouraging kind that said, “If you want this, girlfriend, then you better go get it.”

And so one Sunday evening I told Paul what I had been avoiding for more than three magical years: I needed to go after what I wanted.

Because he loved me, he let me go.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

First of all, thank you for your book. If I hadn’t picked it up at work, I wouldn’t have been able to start taking charge of some major health issues I was not aware of. Your quizzes are very helpful. Why are so many of us in the dark about our diet and the importance of a “healthy gut”?

Dr. Susan Blum: Because we are in the midst of an obesity epidemic, and also a self-image crisis, everyone is very focused on being thin and counting calories. This is just the wrong way to look at food. One of my favorite sayings is that “all calories are not created equal”. A 100 calorie apple and a 100 calorie snack bag of pretzels causes a completely different series of reactions in the body. The apple results in less inflammation and the pretzels are the opposite. We need to shift our thinking away from calories to the idea that food has function, and we need to choose our food based on the information it brings into the body. This is a new field called Functional Nutrition and when practiced by a doctor is called Nutritional Medicine. Eating this way has the power to prevent and treat disease, and this is the approach I use in my medical practice. Many registered dieticians are still behind the times, and so many people don’t understand this yet. But the word is definitely getting out.

The importance of a healthy gut has become news in the last decade. While those of us in functional medicine have known this for longer, recent studies have shown the medical community conclusive evidence that the health of the gut has the power to drive inflammation throughout the body—certainly for autoimmune diseases, but also for other inflammatory conditions like osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia. These conditions are on the rise, in epidemic numbers. One of the reasons is that we have been very cavalier about doing things that harm our intestinal flora: taking lots of antibiotics, and antacids for example. Not to mention all the medication like Advil and other NSAIDS, alcohol and stress. As a nation, our guts are a mess, and we are just now seeing conclusive evidence of the fall out.

But at the end of the day, one of the main reasons that people are in the dark about the role of food and gut health is that most physicians aren’t trained to understand this connection, or taught skills to teach nutrition or treat the gut in this way. Medical schools still don’t teach nutrition, and conventionally trained rheumatologists don’t know anything about the gut connection to arthritis, for example. If people don’t hear it from their doctor, where will they learn about this and believe it is true? While the Internet is very helpful, when your doctor doesn’t believe or know about this, a lot of people don’t get on board either.

Autoimmune disease is on the rise. What is the biggest challenge to overcome when you’re diagnosed with an autoimmune disease?

The biggest challenge to overcome when you are first diagnosed is the attitude of the conventional medical community. You are usually told there is nothing you can do, that there is no hope of cure, and the best you are offered is medication to try to control the symptoms. People become passive and give up and feel hopeless and depressed. This is not the road to healing! People need hope, they need to know that there IS something they can do to find the cause of their illness, and cure the cause, and then they will feel better and improve without medication. They need to feel empowered.

Is the popularity of a gluten-free diet helpful or harmful?

I would say the popularity of a gluten-free diet is both helpful and harmful. It is helpful because in most areas (except in rural areas, perhaps) there are so many gluten-free products available in the supermarket or health food stores that you can adopt a gluten-free diet relatively easily. And there isn’t much stigma associated with eating this way.

I suppose one way it can be harmful is that some people dismiss it as a fad just to sell expensive food. But I think there are so many people who obviously feel better on a gluten-free diet that this is irrelevant.

There is so much evidence in the research that gluten causes inflammation and autoimmunity in the body, that it is hard to dismiss this as a fad. So, I would support the positive side and say it’s good that it’s popular.

Many of us have had amalgam fillings all of our lives. Dr. Oz recently did a show on the dangers of mercury in our mouths, and my own (integrative) M.D. strongly recommended I remove all of my amalgam fillings ASAP. My dentist scoffed during my first appointment, but I am proceeding all the same. Why is there so much controversy over the safety of mercury fillings?

I think that most people agree that mercury from fillings can leach into the body and cause problems. There is also mercury “vapor” that can be released and inhaled. The controversy seems be that after having the same fillings in your mouth for many years, most dentists believe there isn’t much mercury vapor being released any more and that removing the fillings are therefore unnecessary. The problem is, this attitude isn’t really based in fact because it is hard to know which fillings are a health hazard and which ones aren’t. There have been studies that have looked at silver fillings and autoimmune thyroid disease, with a drop in mercury levels and an improvement in antibodies when the fillings were removed.

I am a believer that they should be removed, especially in people with thyroid disease because the mouth sits right next to the neck, where the thyroid is located.

What is self-care, and why is it essential to our overall health?

Self-care means that you are fully engaged in activities that are good for you, and making time for yourself to do these activities. Examples of self-care are eating healthy, meditating or practicing other relaxation techniques, and exercise. These kinds of activities are essential to your overall health because stress, eating poorly, and too little exercise contribute to 80 percent of all our chronic disease in this country. In order to treat and reverse illness, lifestyle change is crucial, and this isn’t something that a doctor can just give you a pill for.

And this is the other part of the definition of self-care: You are a partner with your health care provider. You need to do your part. It turns out that people who are fully engaged in helping themselves in this way heal faster and do better then people who take a passive role and expect to be “fixed” by someone else.

How much are all the plastic products we’re using every day affecting our health? I realize that in the course of a day—despite my best efforts—I drink from plastic, eat from plastic, throw away receipts made of plastic, use a phone made from plastic, work on a plastic computer with a plastic mouse and write with a plastic pen, and carry a ton of plastic in my purse. Then I get home and try to remove plastic from my household and my pets’ food. It’s exhausting.

I like to use the concept of total toxic load to think about environmental exposures. These things are cumulative. Your liver is in charge of removing toxins from your body, and it needs lots of nutrients, like greens, antioxidants, protein, and cruciferous veggies to do its job effectively. Plastics have toxins that leak out into the food, and for some people it might not be as big of a deal if they don’t have a lot of other environmental exposures like pesticides, heavy metals, or air pollution, to name a few. The liver has to deal with all of it. If you have a high exposure to many things, adding plastics to the list can just be too much. Some symptoms of having an overload of toxins are fatigue, brain fog, weight gain, feeling puffy and swollen.

The best strategy is to go to a website like ewg.org and try to reduce the toxins in your world. Couple that with eating lots of veggies to support your liver detox processes, and you can increase your protection from all those things you can’t see.

Can you please explain what the rotational diet is, and why it is being recommended more frequently by medical professionals such as yourself?

Rotation diets are used to treat food sensitivities. Here is the definition of a food sensitivity: You feel worse when you eat it and better when you don’t. There is more and more understanding now that eating the same foods day after day can increase the possibility that your body will become sensitized to that food. By doing a rotation diet, you can reduce the immune reaction to a particular food by not eating it every day.

I found it interesting that you said “going more than four hours without eating activates your stress system.” When is it best to eat our main meals, and how often should we be eating? Do you recommend small meals over three main meals?

Cortisol, the stress hormone helps regulate your blood sugar. So when you haven’t eaten for more than 4 hours, your blood sugar can drop, triggering a release of cortisol to bring it back up. If you are trying to restore balance to your stress system, for example when treating adrenal fatigue, you don’t want to add this stressor. Therefore, I recommend eating breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, with some form of protein (veggie included) at each meal. I think every 4 hours is a good rhythm, so if you eat an early breakfast you might also need a snack mid-morning.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

“Skinny jeans” may look sexy, but according to New Orleans neurologist Dr. John England, the increasing number of women who have taken to wearing them are running the risk of suffering from a nerve condition called meralgia paresthetica, or, as it’s more popularly known, “tingling thigh syndrome.” The condition occurs when constant pressure—in the case of skinny jeans it’s rendered by the skintight denim—cuts off your lateral femoral cutaneous nerve, causing a numb, tingling, or burning sensation along the thigh. Sometimes, merely swearing off restrictive clothing is all it takes to remedy “tingling thigh syndrome,” the Johns Hopkins Hospital advises. But, unfortunately, an injection of a corticosteroid may occasionally also be needed to reduce swelling. And in truly stubborn cases, the hospital warns, a procedure known as “sensory nerve surgery” may be required to relieve the compression surrounding the nerve.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

This recipe is a staple meal in the teaching kitchen at Blum Center for Health and is enjoyed by students and teachers alike for its nutrition, color, texture, and taste. The “Buddha” comes from the sublime feeling you have after eating this bowl full of colorful vegetables and protein-rich quinoa topped with creamy dressing. For even more protein, add beans, chicken, or tofu. Also, you can change the vegetables according to the season.

Makes 4–6 servings

1 cup short-grain brown rice, rinsed
2 cups water or vegetable stock
Sea salt
4 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil
Freshly ground pepper
2 cups peeled, cubed butternut or kabocha squash
1 medium yellow onion, thinly sliced
6 cups kale, washed, ribs discarded, and leaves chopped
1/4 cup tahini
Juice of 1 lemon
1 tsp grated ginger
1 1/2 tsp honey
1 1/2 tsp sea salt
3/4 cup hot water
1/2 cup toasted walnuts or pumpkin seeds
1 avocado, peeled and cubed

1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.

2. Put the rice, water, and 1/2 tsp salt in a small pot and bring to a boil. Cover the pot, reduce the heat, and simmer for 40 minutes or until the water is absorbed.

3. Take off the heat, fluff with a fork, cover, and let sit for another 5 minutes.

4. Mix the squash with 2 tbsp oil and add salt and pepper to taste.

5. Spread on a baking tray and roast for 20–25 minutes or until browned and fork tender.

6. Heat a large sauté pan and add 2 tbsp oil. Add the onions and spread them out evenly in the pan. Do not move the onions until they start to brown. Then stir and reduce the heat to low.

7. Continue to let the onions caramelize for 15 minutes, or until they are soft and brown. Remove from the pan and set aside.

8. Add the kale with a pinch of salt into the sauté pan that had the onions and cook until the kale begins to turn bright green and soften slightly. If the kale begins to stick to the pan, add a little water and cover the pan, allowing kale to steam for 1 minute.

9. To make the sauce, mix the tahini, lemon, ginger, honey, and 1/2 tsp salt. Add the water until you reach a smooth and pourable consistency.

10. Serve in individual bowls with 1/2 cup brown rice on the bottom topped with caramelized onions, squash, and kale. Put a few cubes of avocado and toasted nuts on top. Drizzle the tahini sauce over the prepared bowls.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

Fruit: As the labs of the world continue in their quest for new antiobesity marvels, the latest to emerge is the humble tangerine. Citrus fruits in general, and tangerines in particular, contain high concentrations of nobiletin, a compound that “protects from obesity and atherosclerosis”—in lab mice at least. If you like tangerines, eat them, perhaps spending time meditatively peeling away the pith. The same group of researchers previously found that grapefruit, rich in a compound called naringenin, encourages the liver to burn fat rather than store it. Grapefruit also contains compounds such as liminoids and lycopene (thought to have anticancer properties), and clocks in at only 39 calories per half, making it a good fast-day food. (You should, however, be aware that grapefruit interacts with a number of common medicines, so if you are taking medication such as statins, consult your doctor.) Alternatively, you could always throw in a watermelon slice (30 calories per 100 grams, about 3.5 ounces) or an apple (around 50 calories per 100 grams) for flavor, crunch, and pectin, a soluble fiber that can’t be absorbed by the body but is useful in fat digestion. Apples are the ultimate convenience food, though they are quite high in calories; eat the whole thing, skin, seeds, and core—you’ll probably want to if it’s one of your fast-day treats. Tomatoes also contain lycopene, which may help guard against cancer and stroke. A handful of cherry tomatoes or strawberries (low GI, low GL) could be your best bet to get you through a tummy rumble unscathed. Check for calorie traps before you eat.

Hear an excerpt from The FastDiet audiobook read by author Michael Mosley

Berries: Blueberries are high in antioxidant polyphenols and phytonutrients. New research has found that these bold little berries may also be able to break down fat cells in the body and prevent new ones from forming. Pretty impressive, eh? Even if you don’t buy the science, blueberries remain a handy source of vitamin C. Once you’re berry savvy, you may want to cruise your local health food store for other super foods: goji, acai, aloe, hemp seeds, chia seeds, and spirulina (a nutrient-rich blue-green algae). All curious, all good.

Vegetables: Again, aim for a wide variety of vegetation—different colors, textures, tastes, shapes. Steamed broccoli contains a whole world of nutrients (including vitamin K). Green beans love a little lemon and garlic. Fennel is great if shaved (invest in a mandoline), perhaps teamed with orange segments and a squeeze of the juice. Edamame is a good source of low-fat protein and omega-3 fatty acids. Starchy veggies, of course, tend to have a higher GL and calorific value, though they are satiating. Proceed with caution and don’t add butter.

Leaves: It goes without saying that green leafy veggies are your fast-day friends. Spinach, kale, chard, mustard greens, salad leaves… a veritable vitamin fest, and agreeably low in calories. Pep things up with chili flakes, ginger, cumin, pepper, lemon juice, garlic. Garlic, by the way, contains allicin, the active ingredient that lends it pungency and is also thought to protect cells and reduce fatty deposits, so be liberal and carry (sugarless) mints.

Herbs and spices: Lo‑cal, high-impact, no brainer. Pickles may work for you too—cornichons, jalapenos, onions (watch the GI values)—or mustard; anything, really, that brings a bolt of fire or flavor to your plate.

Nuts: We’ve established that nuts are a fast-day favorite: filling and low GI. Almonds, though calorific, are high in protein and fiber, which makes them brilliantly satiating; pistachios, too (better yet, they take ages to crack and eat). Cashews and coconut flakes will help animate a salad. But count wisely; nut calories soon add up.

Seeds: Sunflower seeds contain good fats, together with iron, zinc, potassium, vitamins E and B1, magnesium, and selenium—all that goodness in a tiny little packet.

Soup: Scientists at Penn State University have found that soup is a great appetite suppressant. Go for a light broth or a miso soup; choose carrot and coriander over a creamy chowder.

Cereals: Oats are a standby low-GL staple, but mix it up; you could experiment with bulgur, couscous, or quinoa—they’re high in protein and fiber, easy to cook, and a good source of iron.

Dairy: Milk products, though full of protein and calcium, can also be high in fat. Opt for low-fat alternatives—and save the cheese board for tomorrow. Fat-free yogurt will bring protein, potassium, and—if you want them—probiotics along to the party, and like nuts, will help you feel fuller longer.

Whatever you eat on a fast day (or any day), the most important thing is to relish it. Go slow.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

Have you seen When Harry Met Sally? I’m the first to admit that I’m so Sally when I order food at a restaurant. And you will be, too, only to the degree that we must become quite comfortable with modifying our ordering from the menu when dining out. I’ve put together some guidelines for menu ordering even when there don’t seem to be any Paleo options! First, call ahead and explain your food requests to the host. I’ve found very often that when asked in advance, the chef is happy to prepare alternatives that are Paleo-friendly.

• When you arrive, read the menu thoroughly to determine if there are, or are not, any outright Paleo options. Things to look for are poached, baked, grilled, or roasted proteins, vegetable dishes, and salads. These tend to be the easiest to modify, if need be, simply by asking for no cheese, no sauce, or no croutons. Always be sure, though, to confirm that there are no hidden ingredients that might cause harm. Gluten and soy, two very common hidden ingredients in sauces, stews, soups, marinades, and even roast veggies, are probably the best examples. Explain that you have food allergies to soy, gluten, and dairy and ask the server to please double-check with the chef that he or she will be able to prep your food to your specifications.

• If nothing is screaming “Eat This” at you, start getting creative. Now it’s time to get down and dirty. Scan for mere mentions of Paleo food in the menu. Do you see spinach listed as part of their veggie omelet or arugula in the warm bleu cheese–laden salad? That means they have leaves! Perhaps you spot grilled chicken as an offering to top their Caesar salad; aha—protein!

• Keep in mind that even in the most seemingly dire of situations, you can almost always find something. While crewing for one of my husband’s 100-mile running races, I stopped off at none other than a Denny’s restaurant and came up with an omelet with vegetables, a side of green salad, and another of fresh fruit. Don’t mistake me; I’m not pretending that Denny’s is a great place to eat and you should go out of your way to get there. The bottom line is that there is always a choice; not having access to the lovely, fresh organic salad at Whole Foods does not have to mean a deep-fried, battered chicken and biscuits free-for-all!

It’s all about the delivery! No need to be rude or condescending, of course; rather, when you position yourself in a friendly manner, nine times out of ten you can rest assured that your server will try to oblige your special dietary requests. Not only will you be able to dine at your favorite restaurants; the server will also stand to receive a higher gratuity.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

Most women with excess androgens have PCOS. It sounds like a scary syndrome, and it is. The most common hormone condition in women of reproductive age, PCOS affects 20 percent of women and can interfere with fertility by blocking regular monthly ovulation. If you are trying to conceive, I recommend asking—no, demanding—that your doctor do a blood test to check your fasting insulin, glucose, progesterone on Day 21, and leptin. This will clarify whether or not you have insulin resistance. Before you go the ubermedical route, you may be able to improve your fertility with a few small lifestyle and food changes specifically targeted to women who want to get pregnant.

Women with PCOS typically develop many small cysts on their ovaries—often between ten and one hundred small cysts. We believe the cysts are a result of disturbed hormones and ovulation, so that eggs don’t go through the normal maturation sequence of (1) a cyst forming around a ripening egg (the corpus luteum); (2) the release of luteinizing hormone (LH) from the brain to trigger the ripe egg to pop out of the cyst and head toward the fallopian tube for possible fertilization; and (3) the now-empty cyst getting reabsorbed into the ovary. Short version: the maturation sequence of the eggs is disturbed so that there is a breakdown and ovulation doesn’t happen. And if you’re not ovulating, you won’t be getting pregnant.

The cysts in PCOS are not dangerous. It’s more that the multiple cysts, along the periphery of the ovaries like a string of pearls, are along for the ride—they are a sign that ovulation is not happening. Over time, the cysts do not grow. They are not the type of cysts that require surgical removal and, unlike some other cysts, are not associated with an increased risk of ovarian cancer. Women are often treated for PCOS with a birth control pill, which suppresses LH and thereby lowers production of ovarian androgens. Not the sort of treatment you want if you’re trying to get pregnant.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

• Is it in working condition? Is it expired? Keeping something that you had good intentions of repairing does not save it from the landfill, it only postpones its imminent demise. Repair it now, sell/donate it for parts, or discard it once and for all (compost expired food).

• Do I use it regularly? Have I used this item this past month? If you’re not sure, stick a date on it and stash it away. If you do not reach for it within a month, donate it. But don’t cheat yourself: using the fondue pot tonight just to prove me wrong does not count. Donate your fondue set and other kitchen items collecting dust.

• Is it a duplicate? Only one set of hands can reach into the oven at once. Pick your favorite pair of oven mitts. When dealing with duplicates, you might find it helpful to set a maximum number or devise space limitations for stuff, and combine foods.

• Does it put my family’s health in danger? For example, Teflon (nonstick), aluminum, and plastics have proved to be health hazards. These should be discarded. This question proves particularly helpful in weeding out toxic items among duplicates (e.g., stirring spoons: recycle the plastic ones, keep the wooden or stainless ones). Eliminating these from your everyday use will put your mind at ease and keep your family happy and healthy.

• Do I keep it out of guilt? If you are afraid of letting go a hostess gift, remember that your guests do not mean to burden you or instill guilt; they just want to offer a polite gesture. It’s okay to let go of something that you never intended to purchase and don’t really want. And when guests ask about the whereabouts of their gift, it is totally acceptable to express gratitude and then to let them know that you are simplifying your life. Be the king or queen of your castle.

• Do I keep it because “everyone has one”? Is it too specialized? Does it truly save time, as promised? We store and maybe even use many kitchen gadgets simply because of persuasive marketing. Evaluate the true need for egg slicers, grapefruit knives, a salad spinner, or a rolling pin. Could another item achieve the same task? A kitchen towel can act as a salad spinner, a bottle as a rolling pin. Often your fingers will do.

• Is it worth my precious time cleaning? Everything in your kitchen is to be considered, even the small items, even those hung on the walls or stored above your cabinets. Think of the decorative items that you have collected over the years: they serve no purpose yet they create visual clutter and require dusting. Are they worth it? The food processor is another high-maintenance item. By the time you have pulled it out of your cupboard and fiddled with and cleaned its bulky parts, you could easily have hand chopped twice as many onions. Is it worth keeping?

• Could I use this space for something else? If you view kitchen storage as real estate, then your junk drawer, for example, takes up some valuable space for just containing junk! If it is really “junk” that you are storing, then why keep it? If it is not, then the contents should go where they really belong, and the free space used to create breathing room between worthy items.

• Is it reusable? If not, can someone else make use of it?

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!

Adopting it is as simple as following these easy guidelines, in order of importance:

1. Fight junk mail. When we recycle junk mail without taking action against it, we perpetuate the wasteful practice and silently ask for more to crowd our mailbox. Junk mail is not only a waste of resources; it’s a waste of our time and tax dollars! Don’t throw it in the recycling without acting against it first. Register to receive less through dmachoice.org, optoutprescreen.com, catalogchoice.org and yellowpagesoptout.org, adopt paperless statements, write “refused- take me off your mailing list” on First Class mail, and open Third Class mail to find a contact number and request that your name be taken off their mailing lists (and your information not be shared).

2. Turn down freebies and single-use plastics. In our consumerist society we’re pounded with free goods. But every time we take a swag bag from a conference, a party favor from a birthday celebration, or a free pen from a fair, we create a demand to make more. When we accept that free plastic pen, more oil will be rigged to make a replacement. Once brought into our homes, these items clutter our space and at the end of their useful life, our landfills. Think twice before accepting a freebie. Don’t you have enough pens already? Stop clutter and waste from coming in by graciously saying no on the spot: “Thanks, but I don’t need one” or “Thanks, but I am trying to simplify my life.”

3. Declutter your home. It seems natural to want to hold on to past purchases so as to “not waste them.” But decluttering is actually a more environmentally sound thing to do. When we let go, we put precious resources back on the market and make them available to others, therefore boosting the secondhand market and decreasing the depletion of natural resources. It’s a win-win: Living with less makes housecleaning a breeze and opens time to do the things that matters most to us too. Question everything in your home. Do you use it? Is it a duplicate? Can something else serve the same purpose?

4. Reduce your shopping trips and keep a shopping list. Running errands separately and without a list is a waste of gas, time and money. Running all your errands on the same day is more efficient. And as simple as it seems, keeping a shopping list is a great way to control consumption and impulse purchases. If you write those things that you wish to purchase on an errands list and run errands on a given day, by the time you’re ready to go shopping, there is a good chance that you’ll have eliminated that want. The less you bring home, the less waste you’ll have to deal with later!

5. Swap disposables for reusables. Disposables are not only a waste of resources, they’re a waste of your time and money shopping for them. Keep your money out of the landfill and invest in reusables instead. You’ll be amazed how much you’ll save over time. Replace plastic bottles with a reusable stainless steel one, disposable razors with a straight or double-edge model, tissues with handkerchiefs, paper towels with rags, paper napkins with cloth ones, and watch your savings grow!

6. Avoid grocery shopping waste. Eliminating food packaging doesn’t just make obvious environmental sense, but financial sense, too. Did you know that when you purchase a packaged good, 15 percent of the price covers the packaging? Reducing your exposure to plastic leaching into your food is better for your health, too. Put together a shopping kit: a few reusable totes, a handful of cloth bags (for dry goods), some jars (for wet items) and head to the fresh counters (meat, cheese, deli, baked goods), and the bulk and produce aisles of the grocery store. You can also refill your egg carton at the farmer’s market, wine bottles at local wineries, and growlers at breweries.

7. Know your city’s recycling policies and locations. Once you’ve refused, reduced, and reused, you’ll be left with little to recycle. But your city might be able to recycle those items that fall through the cracks. Know the materials that are accepted through your curbside recycling or your local recycling center (and those that are not). Also look for or inquire about drop-offs for hard-to-recycle-items in your area and allocate containers for each location. For example, Goodwill accepts worn-out clothing (labeled as scraps), participating Nike-Reuse-A-shoe locations take worn-out sneakers, and BestBuy accepts cords and cables.

8. Choose glass, metal, or cardboard when you must buy new. These materials can be recycled over and over and locally. Plastics, on the other hand, rarely get recycled. And when they do, they get shipped across the world and come back to us in the form of products designed for the landfill. Shopping is voting. Vote for long-lasting and easily recyclable materials, and stay away from plastics.

9. Find a compost system that works for your home. Composting is no longer reserved for farms and gardens. There is a system out there to meet your specific living conditions (whether you are an urban, suburban, or rural dweller) and your diet (whether you produce meat or veggies scraps). Our family uses both city compost (for meat and fish scraps) and vermicomposting (for veggie scraps). I found the worm bin to be a great way to witness the cycle of nature and a convenient way to dispense “worm tea,” a soil amendment that has been most beneficial to our garden. Get to know what your compost system will digest (dryer lint, hair, and nails are all compostable).

10. Turn your home kitchen trash can into one large compost receptacle. No need to buy a small countertop receptacle as those advertised. For composting to be successful, make sure your receptacle is aesthetically pleasing, within easy reach and large enough. The bigger the compost receptacle, the more likely you’ll be to use it freely. We found that an under counter trash can meet all those needs perfectly. We only need to empty it once a week and it does not smell (we freeze bones and fish until pickup).

For hundreds more tips and how-to’s, check out my book, Zero Waste Home. And remember: You’re not alone! There is a whole community of like-minded individuals on my blog waiting to hear about your experience and share theirs.

Get fit. Find nutrition facts. Live a healthy lifestyle. Sign up for our newsletter!