I thought Herman might be dying tonight. Past tense. I think he’ll survive another day, maybe a few hundred more days if we’re lucky. But his laryngeal paralysis is really taking a toll on him. A quick search of the blog seems to indicate that I haven’t written about this at all, which surprises me. Not going to explain it now; that’s what the hyperlink is for. I’ve been thinking of finally doing the tieback surgery, figuring it will be worth the enormous expense if Herman could get 1-2 good years where he could breathe easily, since he hasn’t breathed easily for years.

Anyway, tonight his ongoing panting and wheezing seemed…well, not worse than usual, because the usual has been pretty severe of late. But tonight I had this sense that even the preliminary lung x-ray he is scheduled to get on Wednesday might be too little, too late…or, rather, just irrelevant. Herman has always looked like he’s at death’s door when he’s out of it, but tonight he truly seemed like he could go at any time.

He had his head next to my arm while I sat on the couch to watch Mad Men, and his breathing was labored. Many nights before, I’ve wondered if that night would be the night I’d be taking him to the emergency vet, and he’d have to be intubated or put to sleep. Tonight, I wondered if he would just as well decide to skip that part. Actually, initially, I did just think he was having a bad night, but it was unusual in that he had had no exertion during the day and little reason to get excited about anything. With the rain coming down hard, he didn’t even get a second walk. I got him a double dose of pain meds in Pill Pockets, hoping that would at least ease some of the burden on his old body. He did get off the couch to follow me to eat the treats.

And then he lied down on the living room rug. He fails to jump back onto the couch only when he is especially exhausted. I had a compulsion to lie down next to him, something he typically doesn’t allow. Or, at least, he usually turns away from me. But he seemed to want me there, and he rested his paws on my arms and seemed to keep eye contact with me with his hazy squinting eyes…

And I’d go on and try to describe this in more poetic detail, and it did go on for about an hour, but, in the end, there’s not much of a story. He’s still here. It was just a dress rehearsal. “You’re not going to die tonight, are you? Well, good, I have things to do,” I said to him before I got up to do the nightly routine.

We’re back on the couch now. He’s an inch from my elbow. He’s taking deep, wheezy breaths. He’ll get his chest x-ray on Wednesday. My vet thinks it’s best to make sure he doesn’t have something else going on before referring me onto the surgeon who does the tieback procedure.

So what was the point of my writing this? Not quite sure.

Despite feeling as if these songs had defined me for decades, over the last year, and especially over the last few months, I’ve found myself listening to none of this music. Spotify and Pandora have broken down some walls. I’d honestly have to pull up one of those Pandora “why we included this song” music genome analyses to describe what I listen to these days. That’s for another post I probably won’t be writing anytime soon.

Anyway, I did see Bryan Adams in concert a couple of months ago, and I’m seeing Barry Manilow later this month, so some things don’t change.

Ok, I’ve got to catch up on my Top 379 recaps on Toastiest…

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And, in the days before the internet and DVRs, growing up, I did dig through the TV Guide as my local stations would shuffle At The Movies around on the schedule, because it was one of my must-see programs each week. Siskel & Ebert were the best.

There are thousands of wonderful writings that Roger Ebert has left. There is so much great stuff being posted around the internet today. This 2012 blog post about his wife Chaz makes me smile.

But then I decided I’d cut the cord again. I took a hiatus. Then I reactivated with a more stripped-down plan. Then I took another hiatus. Then I quit. Initially, I was trying to save money. Later, I decided that all of the TV options were too much of a distraction, and quite a bit too much money. However, I would’ve been receptive to the right deal had the cancellation rep offered it.

So I’d been one of those people who was too cool for cable or satellite TV for about a year-and-a-half. But lately I’ve been wondering why I deprive myself. I’m not happier watching good shows nine months after they’ve aired. I’m not happier only having the option of watching The Daily Show on my laptop…I don’t like watching it on my laptop. I WANT to watch breaking news on the TV when it happens. I LIKE to watch live sports. I don’t like 95% of what’s on, but I can afford the $70/month right now, so, damn it, I’m not going to deprive myself anymore.

I wanted to go back to DIRECTV a couple of weeks ago, but the rep I spoke with would not give me the new customer deal since I had not been an ex-customer for at least two years. Thus, I had another flirtation with Time Warner Cable, whom, as I recently posted, failed to win me over. Today, I visited the vendor selling DIRECTV for Costco. He told me that I should be able to get the new customer deal as long as I didn’t mention the whole being-a-recent-customer thing. In fact, the DIRECTV rep who confirmed my order via phone simply asked if I was currently a DIRECTV customer.

It will be re-installed on Wednesday. 3 free months of HBO and Showtime. (And Cinemax, but, WTF is on Cinemax?) I can watch Mad Men with the rest of the country. I can watch Game of Thrones even if I don’t know what the hell is going on. I can catch up on HBOGO…or I can just read some summaries on the internet. I actually did watch a fair amount of Season One during my last engagement with DIRECTV.

So I’ve missed essentially two entire Duke basketball seasons now. On one level, I haven’t cared at all. Truly. Being a fan just hasn’t been that important. Yet…on another level, I miss being a fan. Being a fan is a lot of fun, and it does take you out of your decrepit life for a couple of hours here and there. (I don’t mean your decrepit life; I mean mine. And I don’t mean my life is decrepit. It’s just the random adjective that popped out).

On that note, I’ve gotten a subscription to MLB Extra Innings for what amounts to something like $5/month. I truly did love major league baseball when I was a kid. I haven’t loved it in at least 20 years, but I feel like giving it a try.

The moral of the story is…let yourself be entertained for Pete’s sake.

Today, I received a call from a gentleman asking about my Time Warner Cable experience. He wanted to be my “personal representative” and said I could reach him anytime via his cell phone. Sounded fishy. Then he offered me a price that was even higher than what I was going to be paying. I called bullshit on him and told him he had just made it more likely that I’ll never get TV from Time Warner Cable.

If and when I decide I want real TV again, I’ll go back to DirecTV.

I used my blog instead of Facebook for this communication, just because…not necessarily an indication of a return to blogging

142
Chicago
King Of Might Have Been

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Here’s four out of the five of them feeding (or trying to feed; some apparently try to nurse on random body parts):

Here’s the runt, not up for the competition:

146
Meat Loaf & Patti Russo
Is Nothing Sacred

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