Photo courtesy of http://www.sxc.hu/

Our family has recently completed a journey to adopt and immigrate our son from South Africa. This process took over four years and included custody, name changes, countless documents, and finally culminated in him receiving his US citizenship and passport.

I’ve been reflecting on this journey recently. My son’s identity has changed. He has a new name, a new country, and a new family heritage.

This does not change his story. Where he came from will always be a part of his life, but how he is known is completely different.

It is this way with all of us. Our past is a part of who we are, but we have a new identity through Christ.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Cor. 5:17

This is so clear through the example of Abraham. Look at these two verses side by side and notice the difference.

Genesis 17:17 – “Then Abraham fell on his face and laughed and said to himself, Shall a child be born to a man who is a hundred years old? Shall Sarah, who is ninety years old, bear a child?”

Romans 4:19 – “He did not weaken in faith when he considered his own body, which was as good as dead (since he was about a hundred years old), or when he considered the barrenness of Sarah’s womb.”

The Genesis account is the facts. Abraham indeed fell on his face and laughed. He knew his body was as good as dead. His past is a part of his story.

The Romans account is the same story through the eyes of a new identity. Abraham is now seen through the eyes of being counted as righteous (Romans 4:5). It is as if the laughter never happened. Paul can truly say Abraham never weakened in his faith when he considered his own body. That’s how serious God takes his new identity.

Amazing.

Read it again, it really says that.

My son will always have where he came from as a part of his unique story. Those are the facts. His past does and will shape him.

But his identity is changed. His past is not a prison, but merely a chapter in the story.

He has a new name, a new family heritage, and a new citizenship.

As is ours. We always remember the facts of our story and the ways it has shaped us. Yet these memories are not our identity.

• Paul calls the Corinthians “sanctified and saints“, even when their lives don’t look so saintly.(1 Cor. 1:2)
• He tells the Ephesians they are in Christ. (Eph. 1:3)
• Revelation says believers are clothed in white. (Rev. 5:5, 22:14)
• Our citizenship is in heaven (Philippians 3:20), but our story comes from Earth.

Perhaps we would be better served to focus on our identity, not merely our story.

What part of your identity do you need to be reminded of today?

###

Chris Lautsbaugh is married to Lindsey with two boys, Garett and Thabo. He has served in missions for the last 20 years, currently in South Africa. He blogs at www.nosuperheroes.com and has written “Death of the Modern SuperHero: How Grace Breaks our Rules“. Chris is a recovering superhero, daily in need of the grace of God. You can follow him on Facebook or Twitter.

My parents divorced when I was very young and a few years later, my mom was remarried to a military man. Next thing you know, we were flying half way across the world to Okinawa, Japan. Uprooted from the prevalent Hispanic culture in Spanish Harlem, New York, I started to lose sight of where I came from.

Puerto Ricans typically have big, tight-knit families. Since we were travelling the world and living isolated in military housing, that scope of family dwindled to our household. That is, my parents and my two sisters. I never experienced the big family get togethers or what it was like to grow up with cousins that felt like brothers and sisters.

My parents didn’t speak a lot of Spanish in our house. They are both fluent but it seemed that they were more comfortable speaking the language of their surroundings. The times when we did get around other Hispanics, I was teased because I was too shy to speak Spanish. I felt humiliation when someone spoke to me in Spanish and I gave that squinty eyed look of confusion that indicated, “I have no idea what you just said.”

My surroundings and my reaction to those surroundings assaulted my identity as a Puerto Rican. The playful teasing made it worse. Even when I tried to hang a Puerto Rican flag from my rear view mirror to show the world my identity, it didn’t always ring true to me.

Birth Determines Identity

What I failed to realize in the moment was that my actions don’t determine my identity. I can “act” like a Puerto Rican or I can “act” like all my white or black friends. The fact of the matter is that, through and through, I am a Puerto Rican.

When I realized that nothing can change the fact that I am Puerto Rican, I took that burden off my shoulders. I stopped trying to act like a Puerto Rican and I decided to just be a Puerto Rican.

Made Righteous Through Rebirth

In the same way, I’ve struggled with my identity in Christ for the majority of my life as a Christian. Sure, I prayed the “sinner’s prayer” and accepted Jesus into my life as my Lord and Savior. That was cool and all but I was still learning what that all meant.

As I immersed myself in Christian culture, I looked at other Christians and tried to mimic their behavior. I tried to figured out what a Christian “acts” like and do my best to look the part. The problem was that I fell short way too often. I didn’t always feel holy and pure.

It was always easier to consider myself “a sinner saved by grace” rather than take a hold of the radical message that I am righteous by His grace (Romans 5:19). How could I consider myself righteous when I kept on sinning and not acting like a good Christian?

The Reckoning

No amount of striving makes me any more of a Puerto Rican. Both of my parents are Puerto Rican. I am full-blooded, through and through. I can act like a Puerto Rican by speaking Spanish, eating arroz con gandules y mofongo, being an awesome salsa dancer and going to the Puerto Rican Day parade in New York City. But even if I never do any of that, I’m still a Puerto Rican.

When I consider that my actions don’t determine my identity, I find it absolutely freeing. It takes away all my efforts in trying to be something. It takes the guilt away when I feel like I’m not doing it well.

Romans 6:11 talks about this “reckoning” of who we are in Christ. That word means to count, consider, esteem or regard. Paul is saying consider yourself dead to sin. Not by effort but by birth. This is the new life that is available to us weather we realize it fully yet or not.

In other words, he’s saying consider yourself dead to your actions. You are no longer a “sinner saved by grace,” you are now “righteous by birth”.

In the same way I had to consider the fact that nothing was going to change the fact that I’m a Puerto Rican, I have to consider the fact that nothing will change the fact that I’m righteous through Christ.

Comfortable In Your Skin

It took me awhile to be at peace with the fact that I’m not fluent in Spanish, I don’t dance salsa and I’ve never roasted a pig (pernil). But I’m getting more comfortable with that fact. In fact, that freedom makes me want to actually want to be more of who I am.

I’ve talked about taking salsa lessons with my wife. That would be fun, not to prove to anyone that I’m a Puerto Rican but to appreciate my heritage. I may not completely look like what some people might think a Puerto Rican looks like in my first lesson but soon enough I’ll become comfortable in my skin.

That’s how I feel about my identity in Christ. When I stop trying so hard to be what I already am, I’ll find the freedom to be comfortable in my skin. From that freedom is where I’ll find rest in exactly who I am.

So I leave you with this question:

Do you believe that you are righteous?

Commiseration was a key point of solidarity. Over warmed up Hot Pockets, I discovered that the degree to which you hated your job was equivalent to the number of years in the same department.

In my 5 years on the job, I did find some solace in commiseration. At first it was a way to realize that I wasn’t alone. I needed to know that I wasn’t the only one frustrated with how the company did business in certain areas. But then it just became a way to blow off steam.

After an especially heated conversation with a customer or employee in another department, complaining was a cathartic exercise. It was a temporary release of frustration to completely berate the object of my vexation without actually having to confront the issue.

Five years later when I had another job opportunity, I handed in my letter of resignation faster than the drip coffee could percolate.

Changing Your Mind

I see a parallel of my work situation in the church. I realize that there are a lot of problems in the church. It’s easy to complain about them. There’s a temptation to commiserate with others in the blog world as we feast on DiGiorno’s and disappointment.

At first it feels comforting. We need to feel like we’re not alone with what we’re feeling. We need to know that we’re not crazy. We need to know that maybe someone else is feeling frustrated too.

But we can’t stay there either. Because just like my fellow workers, the longer you stay in that job, the more you’re going to resent it. Eventually you’ll find something else and repeat the cycle.

But until we change our mind about the situation, the dissatisfaction is always going to catch up with us. One of my favorite quotes from Bill Johnson says:

The grass is always greener where you water it.

I know there are a lot of problems in the church. But I want to be part of the solution. I don’t want to be stuck in the break room of life, complaining about how much it sucks. I want to find creative ways to speak life into what I love.

If I sow a lifestyle of cynicism, disappointment and doubt, I can’t expect to reap hope, healing and resolve.

I realize that my commitment to God and His church is so much more important than any job I’ve ever had. So when I find a problem, I’m committed to seeking the truth and finding how to make it better. Because complaining about where I am or running away to somewhere else will never change anything. And I don’t plan on staying anywhere that isn’t changing and progressing.

How do you address the problems in the church?
Do you think it’s important to criticize, find solutions or both? 

Self-Esteem Isn’t Enough

Self-esteem is a a term in psychology to reflect a person’s overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth. In other words, the more you like yourself, the higher your self esteem.

The problem is that our self-perception is filtered through our experience. If we write well, we feel good about being a writer. If we sing well, we feel good about being a singer. But if we fail, we feel terrible about being successful. If we fall short, we feel terrible about finishing.

If we use our accomplishments as a measuring stick for our self-worth, it will lead to pride. With the idea of high self-esteem as a catalyst, we should feel good about ourselves when we do well. The more we do right, the better we feel about ourselves. This ultimately leads to pride and self-sufficiency.

Conversely, this mindset enables our failures to lead to low self-esteem. We begin to dislike ourselves and spiral into disappointment and depression.

When self-perception is based on experience, it’s no wonder there is such a huge disparity on how each person values themself.

The Alternative To Self-Esteem

We don’t need to increase or decrease our self-esteem. We need to get rid of it all together. Self-esteem is too fickle a concept to convey the worth and value of each individual.

The only way we can truly love ourselves is by first being loved by another. 1 John 4:19 says that “we love because He first loved us.” We can’t pretend to love ourselves, much less anyone else until we first learn to receive love.

Our self-worth will not truly increase by thinking positively or mastering techniques. We can only rightly see our value from the One who created us.

He calls us loved (1 John 3:16). He calls us His children (John 1:12). He calls us righteous (Romans 3:22). He calls us complete (Colossians 2:10).

There’s nothing wrong with feeling good about your accomplishments or feeling bad about failures. But your self worth is not determined by what you do or don’t do. Our value has nothing to do with what we think of ourselves. Our thoughts and feelings are fickle but His thoughts toward us are what give us value.

What were you taught about the idea of self-esteem?
How else is the performance-based mentality detrimental to our self-worth?

Faith & Belief

The word “faith” and “believe” in the Bible are almost the same word in the original language. In Hebrews 11, it says that without faith it is impossible to please God. In Genesis 15, Abraham has his belief counted to him as righteousness. Faith and belief are critical to how we relate to God and to the world.

I believe that God values our faith not just because He wants us to trust Him, but because He knows that what we believe determines how we live.

In the same way that we can live righteously in faith, we can live sinfully in faith.

The Power of Agreement

What we believe is a powerful force in directing our lives. This is amplified when our belief is based on agreement. We can come into agreement with either truth or lies. Either way, the result is life-changing.

When someone speaks the truth of God over our life, as soon as we agree it becomes true. As soon as it becomes a conviction, it becomes a reality. When the truth of love is spoken over our life and we agree, we live as we are loved and valued.

The opposite is equally true. Someone can say evil things about you. If you know they are not true, they will not affect you very much. But as soon as you begin to believe they are true, you begin to live like they are. When you are constantly called a failure, you begin to agree with that thought and subsequently you become a failure.

As soon as we agree in faith, we live in faith.

3 Steps To Forming Beliefs

Both our faith and belief go through a progression in our life. There are 3 steps in that progression that frame, shape and solidify our beliefs.

1. Information

It is said that knowledge is power. I would say that knowledge is responsibility. Knowledge has no power if you do nothing with it.

Information frames our belief. It is the first step to creating our foundation of faith. Truth alone won’t shape or transform our belief system. Information does not create conviction.

2. Revelation

Revelation is supernatural insight. It is an uncovering of truth or seeing a deeper dimension to an established truth.

Revelation shapes our beliefs. If information frames our belief, revelation puts skin on it. Revelation may be deeper insight to our own life. Other times we get revelation by seeing truth experienced in the life of others.

One thing to keep in mind: seeing is not always believing.

3. Transformation

Transformation comes through personal experience. It is the culmination of acquired truth, revealed truth and experiential truth.

Transformation solidifies our belief. Once experienced, truth becomes conviction. Transformation is the substance of things hoped for. Once transformation occurs, it is very difficult to be swayed.

Once we have information, revelation and a newly transformed mind, the question becomes, how do we sustain it?

Taking Thoughts Captive

Our thought life is so important because it is the gateway to our beliefs. In 2 Corinithains 10, Paul tells us to take every thought captive and bring it into obedience. Our unchecked thoughts can lead us to deconstruct truth and build a false foundations of lies.

Not every thought we think is our own. We tend to think of every single thought that comes into our mind as something that is within us. That is decidedly false. If Christ is in us, He wouldn’t be producing lies in our mind.

We don’t live based on what we know, we live based on what we believe. That’s why we are susceptible to lies, even if we have knowledge of the truth.

We need just as much faith to sin as we do to be righteous. If we believe we are saints, we will live as saints. If we believe we are sinners, we will live as sinners.

Do we still sin? Of course, but that’s not our identity. As soon as we come into agreement with being a sinner, then we live as sinners and not as we are righteous.

Our faith pleases God because it is gives us the ability to live the life that He paid for. When we have conviction of what is unseen, it becomes reality. Even in our imperfection, we can be the righteousness of Christ.

Learn it. See it. Live it. Only then will we be convinced of it. This is belief. This is faith.

###

Did you have to progress through your belief? Do you struggle with the idea of taking thoughts captive? 

Walking in our identity is not just a matter of acquiring information, it is a matter of changing our core beliefs. More information is not the answer. If it was, this generation would be thriving like no other. It’s not enough to know truth. We must believe it.

Our beliefs are shaped by our experiences. Because we live in a fallen world, all of us have had experiences that skewed our view of God. There are two types of experiences that influence our perception. There are experiences in which we actively participate and those which we passively participate.

When we are exposed to sin, we become either captives or prisoners based on our participation. This is a key element of understanding how to rightly deal with the core lies we come to believe.

Captives & Prisoners

Captives were passive participants in sin. They had wrongs perpetrated on them against their will or in ignorance. They are collateral damage in the destructive decisions and actions of others. Because of this damage inflicted upon them, they may act out in sinful behavior but it is always a reaction to wounding.

Prisoners on the other hand have actively chosen to sin. They become imprisoned until they have paid for their offense. Prisoners continue to live as inmates even after they are told that the offense has been paid. They create self-made prisons in their mind that keep them confined.

There are two core lies that we come to believe by becoming either captives or prisoners.

Core Lie #1: Victimization

Captives are victims and in turn form a victim mentality. The fruit of a victimized mentality are: powerlessness, fear, feeling tainted, hopelessness and confusion. Victims struggle to understand why things have happened to them. They live in fear and feel that they have been tainted and are no longer valuable. Their victimization becomes their identity. Ironically, victims tend to perpetuate to others the very hurt they have experienced.

Core Lie #2: Rejection

Prisoners experience rejection as they fall from grace and in turn form a mentality of rejection. The fruit of a rejected mentality are: shame, disaffirmation and abandonment. Prisoners take on an identity of rejection and shame. They become stuck in a lifestyle of feeling punished and unworthy.

Prisoners have a difficult time seeing themselves as forgiven and many times put themselves in a position to sabotage relationships that believe the best in them. They will seek those that affirm their self-perception of worthlessness.

Finding Freedom

Until these core lies are dealt with, we become predisposed to make wrong choices due to the foundations that have been laid. But there is hope!

Jesus makes this prophetic declaration in Isaiah 61:1:

“The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, because the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the afflicted; He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to captives and freedom to prisoners.”

Did you see that at the end? Jesus knew that there would be both captives and prisoners in need of rescue. Jesus was sent to bring us freedom!

But knowledge is not enough. Our lives do not change by simply reading a passage. In fact, this is a point of frustration for many Christians because they read this good news but never experience it. So where do we start?

Releasing Forgiveness

The best place to begin exposing the lies we believe is by extending forgiveness to the foundational relationships in our life. When we release those that perpetrated sin upon us, we also release ourselves from the bondage that enslaves us. When we release ourselves, we release the grace of God to set us free. But true forgiveness isn’t just excusing our sins or the sins of others. Forgiveness is simply removing the blame. Honest and effective forgiveness can only come by the power of Holy Spirit.

Forgiveness brings us one step closer to exposing the lies we have constructed in our minds. Only then can we uncover the truth.

The truth that we are sons and daughters. The truth that we are righteous in His sight. The truth that we are loved, just as we are, just as we were, while we were still sinners. The truth that we are no longer sinners, but saints.

When we expose the lies, our false foundations crumble. It’s a scary place at first but we rebuild on a solid foundation. It is then that we discover the truth of our identity in Him. It is then that we discover the freedom that we all long for.

###

To study this topic more in depth, I highly recommend the book Freedom Tools by Andy Reese.

It occurs to me that there may never have been a generation before ours with such an ingrained sense of entitlement. Rather than bumper stickers touting the fact that your student made the honor roll, I see ones that say “My child won the monthly attendance award”. Well, color me impressed.

I’m not an advocate of making anyone feel entitled but we have a tendency to over-correct. The reason the idea of participation trophies even came about was to correct our society’s glorification of winners. The mentality is that if you win, you’re valuable but if you lose, you’re a loser. Yet another label I despise.

Maybe they got something right with the concept of a participation trophy and it was just executed poorly.

Our Need For Validation

We all long for validation. We all long to be seen. We can never be satisfied by hiding our efforts. We long for recognition. It’s built into our nature and it’s perfectly normal.

Validation gives us confidence and encourages our direction. It’s an acknowledgement that you’re doing the right thing. Especially when we’re on a new mission, adventure or path. It nudges us out of insecurity.

But not everyone is an all-star. Not everyone will be valedictorian. Not everyone will be a world-reknowned for their talents. So where does that leave the rest of us?

Jesus Received Validation

We know that Jesus lived a perfect life. But up to the point where He began His ministry, not much is said about what He was doing. He was likely an average boy doing average boy things (you went to church and schooled the elders about theology, didn’t you?). Seriously though, what most people refer to are the miracles He did after He was baptized.

The thing is that before Jesus ever did one miracle, He received validation:

“You are my beloved son, with you I am well pleased.” Mark 1:11

Even Jesus needed validation. What’s different in His case was that He got His recognition before He really did anything substantial. He essentially got His participation trophy, not for His merits but for the fact that He was loved.

The most life-changing validation is love, not accolades.

Earning Your Blessings

I’m not saying that your effort is obsolete. Just because we can all receive love without lifting a finger, it doesn’t mean that it ends there. There are definitely blessings attached to accomplishments.

When blessings are talked about in the Bible, they aren’t always given to everyone. Many times there are stipulations attached. Not everyone can just mosey up the hill of the Lord. Only the one with clean hands and a pure heart can do that. Only they will receive that blessing from the Lord (Psalm 24:3-5).

Pleasure Precedes Merit

When we are affirmed before we make an effort, it gives us the confidence to succeed but also the confidence to fail. We are validated regardless of our performance so we don’t base our worth on our effort. If Jesus was a complete failure, He knew that God was already pleased. Not just pleased, well pleased.

With the understanding that He was loved unconditionally, Jesus was able to begin His ministry with confidence. He was validated before He began. Failure wasn’t something He needed to fear.

God does not glorify a meritocracy in His kingdom. He made it clear that we couldn’t live up to His standard. Once we understand that, it makes our striving mentality look foolish.

So maybe there is something to receiving a participation award. Not so we can feel entitled, but validated. The best validation comes from love. Sure we can earn other trophies by what we do in faith but in His kingdom, there are no losers.

Have you ever created something that you loved and then felt like you hated it?

I’ve actually apologized for my creativity. I’ve done it before anyone could make a comment just so that I can protect my heart from criticism.

There are some people to whom I will freely admit that I consider myself a writer. I have no problem accepting compliments and feeling proud of my accomplishments.

Then there are people I consider “real” writers. I don’t go around calling myself a writer in front of them. I talk about how much improvement I need. I talk about how I don’t write enough. I find every criticism I can think of. I do it many times without even being aware of it.

Criticism Is Not Failure

I find that I criticize myself in front of those I respect so that they understand that I don’t think that I have arrived. It’s my way of promising that I’ll get better. I feel that if I criticise myself first, it will lessen the blow of any criticism they may have.

I believed that criticism from someone I respect is a failure. But criticism is not failure. Criticism is either validation for what you intended or an invitation to improve.

Regardless of what kind of criticism it is, be it constructive or destructive, I have the choice to determine my perspective on it.

When I focus unnecessarily on criticism, it instills a fear of failure. It causes me to be safe with my choices. It causes me to devalue myself to protect my heart.

But with a healthy perspective on criticism, I can use to propel me forward rather than tear me down.

How do you handle criticism?
Have you ever criticised yourself in front of those you respect?

I don’t have any background on the video but I have a feeling that this boy had been at it for a long time. Why else would he be so excited? His perseverance finally paid off and he was a success. His dad was excited as well and was the one encouraging him to share with others. I’m sure he was there the whole time while his son continued to fall off the bike and he helped him get back on it.

Watching the result of his victory made me ask myself a question.

Does God want us to fail?

It might sound sadistic but I believe He does. Because when we fail, we have a Father that will pick us up and encourage us the whole way. His encouragement will remove the crippling power of fear in our lives.

Failure with God’s encouragement leads to perseverance, which leads to character, which leads to hope. And Romans 5:5 tells us that hope does not put us to shame.

It’s an intentional progression. The passage in Romans doesn’t say that suffering (failure) leads to hope. It leads to perseverance. You can’t jump to the end because you’ll find yourself trying to hope. And we all know, “there is no try“.

We don’t have to fear failure because it is not our identity. It is simply a step in a progression of hope. The progression comes full circle when after you have received hope, you are compelled to use it to encourage others.

Watch the video of the little boy and be inspired.

Then go do something that seems impossible.

A good friend of mine named Carla just started blogging. She inspired me to something I’ve never had the courage to face with the right perspective:

Failure

More importantly, failing well. It’s easy to talk about, it’s quite another thing to live it. It requires living bravely, communicating bravely and doing so without apology. I’m not talking about trampling over people for your own mission. I’m talking about jumping without a net and not apologizing when you break your leg.

Like anyone else, I have a long list of things I want to accomplish. I want to write more. I want to publish something of value not directly related to my blog. I want to succeed at my new job. I want to eat better. I want to get healthy. Most importantly, I want to succeed at being a great husband in my first year of marriage.

But for the first time, I’m coming into this year expecting to fail. I expect to fail because I refuse to live safe and reserved like in years past.

I want to fail and fail well. Then get back on my feet and try something even more impossible. I want to do this all without apologizing.

I’m confident that every meaningful failure will lead to more growth than a safe victory ever could. I’m confident that every significant failure will lead me to a meaningful success because it is only when I am no longer afraid to fail that I will achieve the impossible.

The biggest failure for me this year will be if I never failed at something of significance.

So here’s to New Years and new beginnings, new failures and new successes!