"Muscle Boy"
Chase straining with all his little might & picking up Mommy's 1000 lb. pocket book
Chase @ 1 year, 6 months, 2 weeks, & 4 days old
"Muscle Boy"
Chase straining with all his little might & picking up Mommy's 1000 lb. pocket book
Chase @ 1 year, 6 months, 2 weeks, & 4 days old
Hi everyone!
Thanks for the lovely comments on my last blog post. All of your words really helped validate my feelings and reminded me that I'm not an ogre after all! I appreciate that more than you know...
Funny, I'm always reluctant to open up on this blog and get deeply personal, but when I do throw caution to the wind and blog with my heart on my sleeve I'm always glad that I did. Blogging can be so cathartic... when you allow it to be. I feel like just being able to express the feelings in that post freed me of much of the angst I was experiencing. And having spoken aloud about the pink elephant in our house, I feel like I've been a calmer and more patient person. (Plus, we had an extra set of hands helping out this past week, which was incredible).
You know, I've never been one who was much good at suppressing emotions... I find that when you do that they always spill out somehow, and usually not in the right way. So again, many thanks for that outpouring of support!
In Other News:
♥ If you follow me on Facebook (my personal profile) don't be alarmed that my wall is missing. I had a few folks email me about it. I didn't de-friend anybody or make any special "lists" to isolate you. :-) I disabled it. *shrug* The truth is I haven't been enthusiastic about it in a while and at this time time really need to focus my energies into the blog and accompanying Fan Page. I have a few personal goals to reach, with regards to this blog, and not a lot of time to work on them.... so I wanted to pour my little bit of spare time into those goals versus maintaining a personal FB presence. Meanwhile, The Prissy Mommy Life Page is still active, so I'd love it if you'd join us over there! :-)
♥ Health Stuff: I realized I never updated you with regards to Chase's vision. Well we did inquire about it at his 18-month checkup. His doctor was great and gave me the referral to a child's eye doctor. I made an appointment for the next week and he checked Chase out thoroughly.... dilated the poor babe's eyes and then ran all sorts of tests. Turns out his vision is fine, and he suggested I come back when he is 3 years old for another appointment, since poor eyesight does run in both our families. Hmmmm, okay. *scratching head* I am glad to know Chase doesn't need eye glasses for now. But I'm still not convinced that the eye rolling/crossing is "nothing" and, once "life" settles down for me I plan to do some follow-up (either another eye doctor or neurologist). Sorry doc, it's not personal, just the type of mom I am!
♥ And lastly, because I didn't intend for this to be that long (funny how that always happens!) I decided to put Chase's transition to his toddler bed on hold - again. If you recall, I first began the transition back in April, when Chase was 15 1/2 months. That was way too early. He wasn't emotionally mature enough for the switch, and kept getting out of bed, playing in his room, coming into the hallway, etc. So I gave it some time and we started back again at 18 months. I found that he was able to nap in his bed, but his naps would be shorter. He'd wake up after half an hour and come out in the hall, and then that was it. After speaking to a couple of girlfriends, I decided to try the transition at night instead of during the day. So I started putting him in the toddler bed at bedtime and just turned a night light on in the room (so he didn't wake up frightened in the middle of the night).
This proved way more effective than the day time naps. He has clearly matured and understands that it isn't okay to get out of bed anymore (or at least knows better than to leave his room and flaunt his presence to mommy and daddy, lol). He now accepts that this is his "big boy bed" and, like the crib, he is to remain in bed til morning. So the first couple of times it went so well - we were excited!!!! Then one day, after I'd laid him down, I heard him start screaming/crying after an hour. I ran to his bedroom and didn't see Chase anywhere. Turns out he had fallen in this small nook between the floor and the window! Omg, it was scary. He was okay though... crying and still asleep at the same time. I put him in the crib, and we then put some stuff in that nook to prevent him from falling again. But last night he fell out of bed again, at 3 am. I heard a thump and then he started wailing. I raced into the room and picked him up. He was a little dazed but otherwise okay. I had lined the floor with stuffed animals in the event that this happened, so he was startled more than anything. Anyway, this made me realize that, until I can get some real guard rails, he isn't quite ready for this toddler bed. He doesn't yet sleep with that "unconscious but conscious" awareness that there aren't the constraints of crib bars, and I think that's something that will have to come with time.
I'm okay with that now. Like, seriously. When the new baby is ready to transition from co-sleeping in his bassinet to the nursery with Chase.... if Chase isn't yet transitioned over, we'll just get a second crib. It's really all good. The toddler bed can be stored until somebody is ready to sleep in it. I realize now that transitioning from crib to "big boy bed" is a huge step, and it's really unfair to rush Chase simply for the convenience of using the crib for his little brother. I want him to transition into it naturally, as he would have were there no baby on the way. So I'm going to let some more time pass and then allow things to organically unfold as they should. I'm quite sure he'll let us know when he's truly ready to make that move!
Hope ya'all have a great week!!!!
38 Weeks Today!
We spend our Saturday mornings at "Daddy & Me" tumbling class at The Little Gym.
Chase @ 1 Year, 6 Months, & 2 Weeks
I've always prided myself on my patience and tolerance, as a friend, as a wife, as a mom, as a psychologist, as a person. So it's hard when you can feel that patience ebbing away, and as the third trimester of my pregnancy has progressed I've felt this way. I've become increasingly short with Chase and I know that I yell at him more than ever before. Little things that toddlers do, such as darting off at every opportunity when outside, throwing their food off the high chair tray and onto the floor, kicking and resisting diaper changes, and tantrumming in the street to be picked up when my arms are filled with groceries just make me so frustrated. After I've yelled loudly at him I feel so sad and ashamed... because I know my reaction is way more intense than required by the situation. I mean, he should certainly be reprimanded for some of those things, especially when he's put himself in harm's way... but my tone is way harsher than I'd like. It's hard when you feel powerless to control your mood and hormones. I don't recall feeling this way with the first pregnancy, but then I didn't have anything as trying as keeping up with a spirited and sometimes willful toddler, while also balancing work and home.
This has been exacerbated by the fact that I've been feeling unsupported and alone lately. I do the bulk of the house-keeping and also most of the caring for Chase. Derek has been struggling with some heavy, personal family stuff, along with a stressful, high profile case at his firm, that has kept him emotionally and physically not as present, which has worn on me. Our communication isn't as good as it once was and I miss as well as resent him for that... even while the more rational side of me knows that he is struggling too. We had a good talk about it tonight, in which I was able to express the frustration I've been feeling and what I need from him. Ultimately, I said to him, I don't want Chase to be the one who suffers because of a pregnant, impatient, mean mom. And we agreed that, despite what he's going through, he needs to step up a bit more and be there for me too... for the betterment of our family system.
I felt a lot better after having this discussion. I'm feeling like my husband and I are back on the same page again, where somewhere in the last few weeks we had fallen off. I think we're both looking forward to the pregnancy being over and meeting Chase's brother. I'm not under the delusion that the work load is going to get any easier... in fact, it will double and we're both aware of that. Only I won't be laden with the emotional instability pregnancy can sometimes bring, causing me to fuss at Chase so much more than he deserves. I feel like I'll be better able to give him what he needs, which is the consistently gentle, patient, and sweet mom I used to be.
Hi Folks,
So I haven't updated here in a while, and it's mainly because I've been trying to tie up loose ends over on the PR side. I'm running a few contests and giving away some awesome prizes over there, so if you haven't already be sure to stop by and enter! I decided to end all contests by 7/19, just because I have no idea when Baby Etheridge #2 is going to make his grand debut... and I don't want to have any outstanding deadlines.
Speaking of the baby... I'm really glad to tell you that intense pelvic pain I experienced a couple weeks ago has completely left! Thank GAWD for that! I just woke up one day.... and was able to get out of bed and move around without hobbling. Now when I sit for a while then stand It's just the normal, 3rd trimester little twinges here and there. But the excruciating pain is no longer. I think it lasted maybe a total of six days? I wouldn't wish that on anyone (lol). Well now I can just enjoy the short remainder of this pregnancy without being bothered with that.
So... I can't say I'm prepared for the baby's arrival just yet. We're still finalizing name choices, for one. Transitioning Chase to his toddler bed... is not going well at all. *smh* It's interesting, I'm so much more disorganized now than I was when carrying Chase. By 36 weeks with Chase I had my hospital bag packed... all his clothes were washed and folded in the drawers, diaper stacker was overflowing with newborn diapers, and I even had wipes in the warmer (which proved to be foolish, because that dang thing dried them out - hence why I stopped using it). But now.... I haven't packed my bag (that's on my To Do list for next weekend). And I also haven't gotten the baby's clothes together. Derek actually picked up the boxes of Chase's infant clothes from where we had them stored.... so he brought that home today. So next weekend is washing/putting away clothes. Hopefully it'll be a productive weekend. I thought this weekend would be but... it really wasn't. I just felt completely lacking energy today... all I wanted to do was lay back on the couch and let the air blow on me. So much for that 3rd trimester "nesting" period I enjoyed last pregnancy. I can't believe I didn't even get my hair done this weekend.... I really wanted to do at least that.
I have my next OB appointment this Thursday. I'm hoping we schedule the date of my cesarean at that time. Chase arrived by (unplanned) c-section at 41 weeks, so with this pregnancy I've elected for a c-section as well, primarily for medical reasons. Right now I'm conflicted about what day to choose - Sunday, August 1 or Monday, August 2? I really want to do what's least disruptive for Chase, since c-sections are major surgery and require hospitalization for up to four days. Bummer. I get sad just thinking about leaving Chase. I know he won't understand.
Anyhoo, hope everyone had a wonderful weekend! I hope it was more productive than mine, lol.
"Vaseline Mischief"
aka
This is what happens when you leave your toddler unattended... and he goes quiet in his bedroom for longer than 5 minutes, so you go in search of him to see what he's up to.
Chase @ 17 Months & 3 Weeks
So annoying and cliche' when people had warned me of this but so true. That reality is only now beginning to hit home for me.
My first pregnancy was pretty symptom free. Very little fatigue, no headaches, no Braxton-Hicks or pre-eclampsia, and blah blah blah. I was glowing and felt gorgeous throughout most of the pregnancy. It was like I wasn't even pregnant. This pregnancy started off the same way and, in fact, had been identical up until just a few days ago. Thanks to my vigilance I've even gained weight at a slower rate so, as far as I was concerned, this pregnancy was even better. But these days I feel so tired all the time... like my body's been taken over by an old lady. No energy or stamina whatsoever, aches and pains where there weren't any before. I'm sure having a toddler to keep up with, run after (yes, literally), and carry around when he gets "in that mood," has played a role. But that's not all.
Since Tuesday I've been experiencing extreme pelvic pressure/pain. Everyone assures me this is normal and that for a lot of women it eases after a week or two - I've heard its the pelvic bones spreading as baby's head travels further down in preparation for child birth. I have to tell you though, it's been very painful, especially when I first stand up. It catches you off guard when you try to take a few steps and discover that you're paralyzed with pain. I feel sharp, stabbing pains if I don't give myself a minute before attempting to move - so strong that I sometimes have to hold on to something lest I fall. Then I slowly limp to wherever I need to go, holding on to things.
I hate that people watch me with that sad look on their face like they wish they could help. I just feel so silly! See, I'm a private, stoic kind of lady, believe it or not, and I loathe that kind of attention. I'm the type who won't ever take medication for pain (unless I have to) and who you'll never hear complain of feeling pain/discomfort, because I hate feeling/looking weak, especially when I know I can handle it.
This morning I was feeling particularly helpless and sad that I don't have the energy to run and play with Chase like he deserves. Derek reminded me that I shouldn't feel guilty about that. We're a team, he said, and wherever I'm weak it's his place to fill in and be my strength. That made me feel so good and I was reminded that, according to the Book of Genesis, I'm his rib. Just feel me on this for a moment, please. Have you ever played sports and fractured a rib? The pain is intense and relentless. As my husband's rib, whenever I feel pain - physical or emotional - he feels it that much worst... because I was taken out of his body. He'll thus make it his personal mission to free us of that pain. He took Chase out this morning to visit his grandmother and run some errands, and I had a chance to rest and just take it easy. When they came back Chase took a good nap, and when he woke up I felt a lot better and we ended up walking across the street to the park where a music festival was going on. Today was a much better day for me... and I hope for the remainder of the pregnancy I continue to have days like this.
Anyhoo... I wonder if the fact that the baby is starting to drop means I'm going into labor naturally this time? As ya'all know, Chase went a week past his due date and I had to be induced. I have a feeling, just from the signs my body is giving me now, that things will go differently this time around! This boy seems eager to come out and join his brother! I saw my OB Thursday for a regular check-up and she said things looked fine. Blood pressure was normal. I go back in three weeks and then those (annoying) weekly appointments will begin shortly thereafter.
Enjoy the weekend!!!
33 Weeks & 6 Days Pregnant
My sister Sibo celebrates the life of music legend, Michael Jackson, through a dance tribute she did with her dance team back in college. Get it Sibo!!!!
R.I.P. MJ!!! We love you!!!
Chase's 18-month check up is just a week away and, as always, I have my list of questions/concerns compiled that I want to discuss with his pediatrician. Along with questions about when Chase should begin seeing the dentist, when we should start thinking about potty training, and whether or not it's okay that he isn't so good at eating with a spoon/fork just yet, my primary concern is his vision.