However, there are some experts like Dr. Fran Walfish who make it clear they whole-heartedly disagree. In a conversation with FlexJobs,  Dr. Walfish begs the question of whether working moms are conditioning their children to simply seek out the "crumbs" in future relationships in adulthood versus the a whole "slice of pie" they deserve.

What they do agree on?  Flexible work arrangements for both parents are a great way to manage time dedicated to work and raising a family.

In our family, as of a month ago, both my husband and I now have flexible work arrangements because my husband's team at work now operate within a compressed work week.  Each member of his team works four days a week with longer days while rotating the days one gets off every week.  My schedule is flexible is well because I telecommute.  I am on the computer before 8:00am most weekdays and work until late afternoon when I pick up my son from camp, then it's back to work after dinner time.

Would this work for every family?  Maybe not.  Does every family have the ability to arrange a flexible work schedule with their employers?  No.  But I think we're moving in that direction.  Just because parents work doesn't mean our children are getting crumbs...it just means we work a little bit harder and smarter to make those slices of pie focused and present.

Here's more about the report's findings from The Telegraph

The latest report, funded by the Economic and Social Research Council, suggested that parents who are struggling to combine paid work with family life need not fear that they are undermining their children’s emotional wellbeing.

Dr Anne McMunn, the lead researcher in the study, said mothers who worked full time were least likely to have children with emotional or behavioural problems, such as hyperactivity, aggression, tantrums or becoming worried or “clingy”.

“Some studies have suggested that whether or not mothers work in the first year of a child's life can be particularly important for later outcomes,” Dr McMunn said.

“In this study we did not see any evidence for a longer-term detrimental influence on child behaviour of mothers working during the child's first year of life.

“Children whose mothers were not working at all had the most behaviour difficulties, followed by children whose mothers were in part-time work,” she said.

The academics analysed results from the Millennium Cohort Study, which tracks the development of almost 19,000 children born in 2000 and 2001, to find the links between parents’ working patterns and children’s social wellbeing.

What about you?  How do you divide up your pie slices of work and life?

The great thing about being at Evo was reconnecting with old friends.  In particular, two of my long-time friends (you know who you are). Our friendship goes way back and without rehashing everything, it's definitely been a rocky road. In fact, it's not unlike the offline long-time friendships many people share: misunderstandings, things getting lost in translation, letting our snarky side get the best of us, and pride getting in the way of saying sorry.  But with that rocky road comes goofy inside jokes that never get old, the ability to ricochet wit and love off one another in a banter that warms the heart and nourishes the soul. 

I had let a lot of the past hurt go, but had not yet translated that into truly moving forward with them.  This weekend did that for me.  I openly laughed and shared and confided in these old friends.

At one point when someone asked how long we'd known each other, I guessed three years, but we were able to go back even further, reminding ourselves just how long the fabric of our friendship has been woven.  I realize that almost four years will not seem long to some but in the blogosphere it's a long time.

During the night, as the sun had finally set on Park City, I jokingly said that our friendship was one that was like Cinderella and the evil stepsisters.  There was a pause as we each pondered which role we'd be cast in...and then, before we could point fingers, I said that at that at different times we'd all been the Cinderella and evil stepsisters.  Then we all giggled because, I'm guessing, we could all remember a time when had, indeed, played those roles.

It's true.  And oftentimes, we don't realize that we were being the evil stepsister until later.  While it's cliche to say that hindsight is always 20/20, it's true.  Sometimes, when we're standing up for a friend or we're doing something in the name of "doing the right thing" there's always someone who is being put on the defense or someone who is made to feel like they've done something wrong.  The number of times this is done because of a misinterpretation of the situation?  Too many to count.  And I'll be accountable right now...I've been the evil stepsister in some situations...and in others I've been Cinderella.  I think though, that when this happens in our friendships with other women, that the root always starts because someone has a good intention.  But good intentions can spiral into lines in the sand, pride not being swallowed, and a retreat from a relationship - not such good things.

So what can we do to mend fences when this happens?  Sometimes?  It is a matter of everyone involved being ready.  And those who are ready being patient for those who are not.  This weekend, the three of us were ready and it opened the door for nostalgia, laughter, and supporting each other in our endeavors the way we used to.

The lesson I learned is to remember that even when I know deep down in side that I'm Cinderella, to heed those times I may have been the Evil Stepsister...for perspective because life isn't a fairy tale but it can have lots of happy endings if you'll let it.

When deciding whether or not to friend your boss on Facebook, some people don't think twice.  While others, it's a cause of major stress.  First of all, you should probably let your boss take the lead on friending you first.  However, if you notice that you share lots of mutual friends, it's ok to friend them first.

Let's weigh the pros and cons...

There are lots of good reasons to friend your boss on Facebook, including:

• They've been a friend before hiring you...chances are you're already friends with them.  No brainer.
• You tend to lead your life like an open book...you're one to share your plans for the weekend at the water cooler and your personal life and professional life merge...a lot.
• You genuinely have a friendly relationship with your boss and like them a lot.

There are probably more reasons NOT to friend your boss on Facebook:

• You have no mutual friends and you can't find them in a general search.  They may want to keep their personal and professional life separate.  It's nothing against you, but save yourself both an awkward situation and don't go out of your way to find them...there's a reason they don't show up in search, right?
• If you have any hobbies outside of work that are controversial or provocative...or the pictures that are posted as a result of said hobbies are controversial or provocative...you probably don't want to friend your boss...that is, unless, you're both into the same extra curricular activities.
• If you can't stand your boss and you like to say as much when you vent to your friends...yeah, you probably don't need me to tell you that you shouldn't friend your boss.

One important thing to keep in mind...if you're not sure how the dynamic between you and your boss is going to play out, you might want to wait to send that friend request.  The only thing more awkward than having your boss ignore your request and not friend you is having your boss discover you "unfriended" them later.  They won't get a notification, but if you have mutual friends it's only a matter of time before they find out.

Now, working full-time, I blog my about my personal experiences worklife balance (or rather, lack thereof) and my blog is my way of sharing what I discuss with a lot of people in email or on the phone as I give advice.  I also have my commitment to LifetimeMoms.com with a post a week...so this blog?  Is pretty low on the totem pole.

So recently, I've been thinking of ways I can get a better handle on my posts here and provide some consistency not only for you, my readers, but for my own sanity as well.

I've toyed with the idea of scheduling them into my calendar and blocking off time, but the fact of the matter is that if a meeting comes up with my team or one of my clients, they're going to take precedent. 

I've also thought about getting up an hour earlier a few days a week and getting my blogging done then, but to be honest, I feel like I don't get enough sleep as it is.  This leads to me catching up by sleeping in on the weekends.

On the flip side, I could stay up an hour later.  However, this would inevitably lead to me checking my email and getting work done an hour later too because let's face it...I'm one of those people who almost always has at least 30 tabs, probably closer to 50 on average, open on my Firefox browser.

Whatever the solution, I need to figure it out...fast... and make it a habit. 

I take pride in the fact that many people reach out to me for career and worklife advice but this time the tables are turned. I know many of my readers manage power jobs and side projects at the same time, so I'm hoping that the real value of this post will be in the comments.

When you think about it though, when it comes to your career, it's just as important to have a personal advisory board.  I have a lot of friends who come to me with career advice, but I'm not so good at giving myself advice.  Often, when it comes to making career decisions, it's hard to to see the forest from the trees and when you have trusted advisors to give you perspective, help weigh your options, and make tough decisions?  You can do so with confidence and certainty.

Without naming any names, I'm going to share with you my personal advisory board and how each one contributes to my success.  Two caveats before I start though:  I make myself available to these people when they need the same kind of advice from me AND they have all proven that they are trustworthy and genuinely have my best interest in mind when I seek advice from them.  The same must be true when you are looking at your own advisory board.

First, is my husband.  He's great at listening and being my sounding board.  He is also really good at taking what can seem like a complicated matter and simplify through pointed questions.  My husband is always my first go-to.

Next, I have a few friends who are in the same industry, they work in online and digital as well.  They're a great litmus test for determining whether or not I should ride something out or take immediate action to make positive changes.

A close friend of mine's husband is great at looking at the big picture and developing a strategy to move forward.  He's been the founder of a start-up and is a true entreprenuer...he's seen just about everything and shares what he's learned freely.  At the same time, he doesn't mince words and isn't afraid to be blunt.  (That's probably an understatement.)  While a lot of friends will put a positive spin on things...he tells it like it is.  Sometimes what he says isn't what I want to hear, but 99% of the time, that's a good thing.

I also have a friend who I have known since the beginning of my career.  He's great at asking questions that are future-thinking but grounded in the present.  He's someone where we constantly share what we're trying to accomplish and then we tap into our vast networks to realize those visions.  He's someone that helps me stay on the path of being stronger, better, and limitless as each year goes by.

I have learned so much from a lot of the women leaders I've encountered in my life, but I have found that including a few key men in my inner circle adds a layer of perspective that is extremely valuable.

As my personal advisory board reads this and recognizes themselves in the post, they may not have realized that I've seen them as so important to my career and my success.  Having a personal advisory board is not a formal process, there are no agreements signed and no real strings attached.  It's more about cultivating reciprocal relationships that are mutually beneficial.

What about you?  Do you have a personal advisory board?

But it's so not true.  It's really important to flex our creativity muscles in other mediums, otherwise our brain will go, for lack of a better word, stagnant.

Whenever I start to feel stuck or restless I'm almost positive it's because I've started to get tunnel vision with what I do on a daily basis.

So now that I realize I need to identify a creative outlet, I've started to create a list of resources available online for this.  However, I'm willing to bet that learning and doing something creative completely offline is probably the best bet.  At this point, though, I'm willing to take what I can get.

THE BALLET BAG

After seeing Black Swan this year I was haunted by the movie (in a good way) and fascinated by the ballet performances in the movie.  I haven't worn a pair of ballet shoes since I was a kid taking a class in the 80's and it's unlikely I will now.  However, ballet is truly a fine art and one that, if given some time investment, could inspire a true appreciation for it. 

I met the founders of The Ballet Bag, Emilia and Linda, through an introduction and we shared a Skype conversation where we discussed our passions and how they could potentially influence one another, mine being digital, theirs being ballet.  What I love about their website is that while their passion for ballet is clear, their passion for sharing the appreciation for ballet runs just as deep.  And for those people like me who have not a clue (although I can still remember what 3rd position means), they make it accessible, inspiring, and unpretentious.  Best place to start?  Their page dedicated to ballet newbies.

CREATE38 Online Watercolor Classes

Every once in a while I get a craving to create something with my hands.  It's no wonder, because while I create daily, it's almost 100% digital and so the only thing my hands are doing is typing and moving the mouse.  I haven't signed up for a class here yet, but if there are a few readers that want to enroll with me, that would be the motivation I'd need to sign up.  What I do love is the instructor, Vinita's, voice and authenticity.  You can tell that not only are you going to learn something but that you're going to genuinely like the teacher.

When looking at the gallery of works her students have completed...I'm not going to lie.  I'm very impressed but it feels a little daunting at the same time.  Daunting can be good though.  It means going outside of my own comfort zone is more likely to happen and that's really the purpose of all this anyway, right?  At $27 per month for lessons, it's a better deal than anything I've seen for an instructor and her community-based approach is geek-friendly.

I HEART FACES for both aspiring photographers and pros

I met one of the co-founders Amy Locurto a couple of years ago at a blogging conference.  Last year for my birthday I asked for a bridge camera...meaning one that was a little bit more advanced than a point and shoot but not as advanced as a DSLR.  I think I've maybe taken a handful of pictures on the camera, deferring to my iPhone when out and about.  My birthday comes again in exactly one month and I'm thinking that perhaps for my birthday, the perfect gift to myself will be to actually use it. 

I recommend I HEART FACES for people in the same boat because there's a photo challenge every week and it's probably one of the strongest photography communities out there.  For me, the challenges would be a lot less about winning but more about connecting and learning from others. 

WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR GETTING CREATIVE?

I covered dance, painting, and photography here today.  There's also music appreciation, cooking and baking, and landscape design...perhaps those will be another post.  What do you do to keep your creative juices flowing?

Don't believe me? 

NextSpace, a co-working and alternative workspace with locations in California just received another round of funding...to the tune of $625k.

I can see why.  With more people telecommuting, working flexibly, and going the independent contractor route these co-working spaces are filling the gap that naturally happens when we work virtually...isolation.

I'm not going to lie.  I go a little batty working from my home office every day.  I don't mind going to the nearest Starbucks and Panera although sometimes you never know how loud or crowded it will be.

And while there are co-working spaces in the DC area, there aren't any that wouldn't require me to sit in some kind of traffic.

But I discovered something absolutely fantastic recently.  The country club near my house has wi-fi.  And a conference room.  And a fitness center.  And a swimming pool.

They also have great golf and tennis but I don't play either.  But as country clubs' members start to age and less people are picking up golf as their leisure sport of choice, the country club near my house (along with others) are now offering "social only" memberships for people like me.

My family signed up.  And while you may think that this would be a more expensive route than a co-working space, think again.  I actually compared prices of reserving a desk for everyday use at some co-working spaces to the cost of the social membership at the country club.  The country club was the better deal.

Now, not only do I have a nice quiet space to work when I my home office is giving me cabin fever, but our family has a great place to go to socialize and enjoy dinner prepared by an amazing chef, my son has a great swim team, and we have a means of making new friends as well.

Plus, because other members of the club are starting to work from the club during the day, they are upgrading the DSL for us. 

And having that fitness center in the same building is a great way to motivate me to exercise more.

What about you?  If you telecommute or work remotely have you checked out the options for a social membership at your club?

Working in the conference room at Norbeck Country Club

The view from my family's cottage on the Chesapeake Bay.

Is it me or does it seem like the warmer it gets, the crazier our schedules become?  I've had more meetings, more deadlines, and more commitments in the past few weeks and there's no end in sight.

Shouldn't the workday feel a little shorter since our days are longer?  With extra daylight at the end of the day we should be enjoying bike rides and barbecues, even on weekdays, right?

Not in this little corner of the world.

I've come to the conclusion that the sun going down is the subliminal message from Mother Nature that my workday is coming to close.  Only, the sun doesn't set until pretty close to eight o'clock at night and, well, that's pretty darn close to my bedtime!

Yet, I do realize that I need to take time to smell the roses...erm...sip the lemonade...you know what I mean.  So, I've been thinking of ways that I can really enjoy the warm weather and goodness that is summer time, even if my hectic work schedule says otherwise.  Here are some that I'm going to try and I encourage those who feel like summer will pass them by to do the same:

• Instead of taking a coffee break in the morning, take a lemonade break in the afternoon.  Preferably fresh-squeezed.
• If you don't have time to take a full hour lunch break and often eat at your desk, try taking your laptop out in the shade and work outside for a half hour.  Avoid doing this when you've got a conference call scheduled..you never know when an ambulance or a yappy dog will go by.
• Bring the outside in.  When you go on your summer vacation, collect artifacts: shells and sand from the beach, rocks and pine cones from the lake.  Put these in a basket or deocrative box on your desk.
• Create a station on Pandora.com dedicated to your favorite beach music.  My favorite is Jack Johnson.
• Instead of watching "How I Met Your Mother", set the DVR and reminisce with your loved one with your own "How I Met..." story.  If you watch the show, you know that it won't take nearly as long to find out exactly "how".
• If you can get away with it, wear flip flops to work.
• Try self-tanner.  Don't forget to wash your hands after!

What about you?  How do you ensure you're not missing out on summer even with a hectic workday?

Re-entering the workforce does not mean you've slipped and fallen.

In more than one conversation during the last month, whether it was by Facebook message, email, or phone call, one recurring question has come up. 

Does returning to the corporate world mean I've failed as an entrepreneur or freelancer?

My answer?

Only if you think so.

There are many reasons for returning to corporate world: the benefits, timing of an offer we just can't refuse, a change in family situation, or because we want to leverage what we've built for the benefit of something larger than ourselves.

Now before I get into this post too far, I must provide one caveat.  The reason my friends asked me for advice is because I've been there.   In 2009, I returned to the corporate world after being an entrepreneur myself.  So am I biased?  Perhaps.  Fair enough.  But I'm also happier with my career and more successful than ever.

Let's first define success.  For me, success means adding optimal value while being able to continuously build on the college degree and work experience I've honed over the years and remaining challenged.  That's always been the definition of success for me. 

Two years ago I was definitely receiving more public acknowledgement for my expertise, I was included on a lot more "most influential" lists, and the traffic on my then blog JessicaKnows.com (the url of which now redirects here) had a lot more traffic than this one.  I was also regularly quoted in major press outlets.  As an entrepreneur, my business was enhanced greatly by my personal brand.  But it was my expertise and credibility that won me clients.

Fast forward to re-entering the corporate workforce.  Guess what...my business? Is now the company I work for.  If there are any lists to be on, it's my goal to get my company's name on it.  Press coverage?  I'm pitching my company's CEO as the source and subject matter expert. 

This is what entrepreneurs and freelancers do when they return to the corporate world.  They leverage their expertise, their networks, and their influence for the company they work for.

It's hard.  Because when you are an entrepreneur or freelancer you live and breath your mission statement because you wrote it.  But when you're working for someone else, you live and breath it because you believe in it.

Which brings me to the advice I gave my friends.  Make sure that where ever you do take a job...that you do everything you can to gain insight into that mission statement.  And the corporate culture.  And the way that company does business.  I've been lucky in my career to have worked for companies where I believed in leadership and the culture 110%...but there are a few times I haven't.  Each and every time I had a gut feeling that something just wasn't right, but there were always a few factors that excited me so much that it quieted that gut feeling.

Once you've built your own successful business, it's a harder pill to swallow when your values don't align with the company you work for.  Don't compromise.  If you've got the skills and leadership, there's no reason you should be taking a job that doesn't align with the strong brand you've built.  You've got to think of it as a marriage...or at least a really serious relationship.

Just because you're considering returning to the corporate world after being an entrepreneur does not mean you're doing it because you failed.  There are lots of reasons for doing it.  For me, I enjoy being part of something bigger than myself.  I like having access to resources that I might not otherwise have.  I get a thrill from collaborating with a team.  And, you know what?  I hate bookkeeping, I can't stand chasing down invoices, and when I knew I had grown my business to the point where I needed to hire people...I can honestly say I wasn't ready for that.

If you're a freelancer or entrepreneur considering returning to the more traditional workforce, look at any job opportunity as a merger and acquisition...not a liquidation of assets.

Image credit: JonTinTinJordan on Flickr

I read for pleasure, for professional development, and for inspiration.  Sometimes my reading enhances my day job and other times it allows me to escape it. 

With that said, I've decided to sponsor my own giveaway and put together a bundle of books that I feel provide some well-rounded selections for my readers, who I like to call Awesome Allies.  Why Awesome Allies?  Because we support each other in our career decisions whatever they may be and bring each other up rather than tear each other down as we strive to have it all...work, career, life...knowing that there are trade offs.

I call quite a few authors of these books my friends, but I have personally ordered or pre-ordered all of the following books and one lucky reader will receive them.

• Drive by Daniel H. Pink
• Good Enough Is... by Becky Beaupre...
• Plan to Party by Elizabeth Mascali...