(Yeah, I didn’t know they had planes in the Ukraine either.)

EEK!

Now, we all know I am cheap, and will often cut corners to save a few bucks. But, I can promise you I will never fly Aeroshit airlines again. Here’s why.

1. There are no movies.

Yup, you read that right. NO movies. On a 10-hour flight. Just screaming babies and snoring babushkas.

We are back in the 1960s, sans the glamorous flight attendants and ability to chain smoke cigarettes. That is a clear violation of human rights, and you probably don’t even need to read the rest of the reasons to know why you should count this airline out.

2. They don’t serve wine.

This needs no explanation. Oh, but their paper cups of concentrated juice (that, um, don’t come with the can – what??) must be an acceptable substitute, right? WRONG.

3. The food is awful.

The food is bad, even for airline food. Unfortunately, food quality is not the only problem. For one, they serve the “drinks” (the aforementioned cups of juice) a good 30 minutes before the meal. Are we supposed to sit, stare at, and not drink our kiddie cups for the half hour before our food comes?

Secondly, we received the EXACT same meal twice. I really wish I were joking. To be fair, I was randomly signed up for the Kosher meal, and maybe they didn’t have a wide selection of Jewstastic options.

Butttt, my friend with a non-Kosher meal received almost the exact same food as before, only that the fish had been swapped for chicken and noodles for rice. But everything else was identical - same sauce, same sides… same shit. 

This is not Dina's happy face.

4. The flight attendants are mean.

But I probably would be if I worked on the world’s worst airline, too. Anyways, though, I don’t really know why you’re still reading.

Because shitty (and free) wine and movies are the only things that make long-haul flights bearable, and I already established their absence in numbers 1 and 2.

5. The planes seem alarmingly out of control.

This is probably because they are from the 1960s. We definitely had a few unpleasant swerves and up-downs (that’s the technical term, I’m sure) on my flights. I think that on all four of our flights, the passengers clapped upon landing.

Though clapping on planes is always unacceptable (humanity’s self-worth dies just a little bit every time it happens), its being a common occurrence on an airline is def not a good sign. There were also ashtrays on one of our planes — which means it had to be old.

Random belt I found in my seat. Why do I get the feeling this is supposed to be connected to something?

Did I mention there aren’t any movies? 

Any airlines that you’ve vowed never to fly again? What about airlines that you’ve really loved?

Five Reasons To Never Fly Aerosvit Airlines is a post from: Travel Junkette

This photo is part of my Meatless Monday series, in which I feature a new photo each week. Because who likes to read on Mondays?  Like me on Facebook and never miss another one! 

PHOTO: Beach & Mountains – Corsica, France is a post from: Travel Junkette

In honor of Mother’s Day, I wanted to share this photo of a beautiful sculpture in Oslo’s Vigeland Park. Moms rock!

This photo is part of my Meatless Monday series, in which I feature a new photo each week. Because who likes to read on Mondays? Sign up for my RSS feed and never miss another one! 

PHOTO: Family Sculpture – Vigeland Park, Norway is a post from: Travel Junkette

I like to think of myself as neither boring nor old, so take a guess what my reason was.

One of my best friends, Claire, and I recently had a “reunion to rock the ages” in Jordan. (And, yes, we really did use that term. We are cool.) We only had five days, as Claire has a big kid job, and had a few things on our “must-do” list. Visiting Petra was one of them.

Petra is the ancient capital of the Nabatean people, founded sometime in the 5th century BC. It’s famous for appearing in “Indiana Jones: The Last Crusade.” Oh, and its amazing stone cut architecture, water ducts, and beautiful rose red color.

It is really hard to describe. Essentially, it’s an ancient city with a lot of really old temples and other things carved into sandstone. Not only does it look awesome, but it feels awesome to just be somewhere SO FREAKING OLD.

Since we had to leave that afternoon for a stay in the Wadi Rum desert, Claire and I wanted to get to Petra as early as possible, so that we wouldn’t run out of time.

Enter the five o’clock watch beeping.

I’m not going to lie – I was none too happy when my alarm went off. Especially being that we had found the only decent gin and tonics in the entire town (country?) the night before at the Cave Bar.

But, arise we did, and ate a quick breakfast at the Saba’a Hotel. The Saba’a was a really nice place – clean, good location, with a beautiful rooftop balcony – but the male owner was a bit annoying slash creepy. So, single ladies, maybe look elsewhere. To find hostels in Jordan (and everywhere else in the world!), check out HostelWorld.

We got to the entrance gate right as Petra was opening (6 am) and handed over a painfully large wad of cash (50 Jordanian dinars, $70 US). Now normally, friends, I would never advise you to wake up at 5 am. Trust me. But this, this is worth it.

The Siq is a narrow canyon that leads into the city of Petra, and walking down it in the early morning was our favorite part.

It is winding, mysterious, and in the morning light and silence, truly breathtaking. Using our (some would say over-) active imaginations, we pictured caravans and spices, genies and Aladdins. Who knows if Nabateans were even into genies, but we sure were.

There were a few other travelers on our path, but not many. Occasionally, a horse cart would clip-clop down the path, the sounds of its hooves echoing throughout the canyon. Can we say PERFECT?

Even when we arrived at the Treasury, the most famed site of Petra (better bust out Indiana Jones on VHS again if you don’t remember it — btw, remember when Burger King gave away Indiana Jones VHS tapes? those were the days), we were able to take photos in peace.

Just us, the camels, and the coolest 18 year old Japanese-Norwegian kid EVER — for proof, look no further than the pix of him dressed up as Indiana Jones, whip and all.

We then hiked up to the Monastery, which was tiring but rewarding, and ate our lunch up there with great views of the surrounding valleys.

Neither Claire nor I are big “let’s stay and look at every single nook and cranny” people, and after almost five hours in the park, we decided we were good.

We started to make our exit around 11 am. The difference was astounding. People and vendors were milling about everywhere, and it would’ve been impossible to get a photo in front of the Treasury without Johnny Hiker and his five cousins in the background.

The Treasury in the afternoon - a bit hectic!

Not to mention, the sun was high overhead and the heat was beginning to stifle. I would not have wanted to climb to the Monastery in that!

The walk out of the Siq, though, was really what cemented it for me.

The best time to visit Petra is in the early morning.

Gone were the images of camel caravans and jolly Nabateans that we had in our heads. In its place were big groups of German and French tourists bustling around in faux-safari clothes and hiking poles.

Quite smugly, Claire and I turned to each other and high-fived. (That’s what happens when you’re friends since you’re five years old.)

Of course, one of the five pictures I took of myself is with a donkey.

We dominated Petra by visiting it in the morning, and you should, too. You can thank me later.

This is a postcard from Jordan. Like it? Then, like me on Facebook! 

The Best Time To Visit Petra Is… is a post from: Travel Junkette

It is SO humpworthy, and I can’t wait to share more stories and photos with you.

We saw a brown bear, a black bear, a mountain goat, seals, eagles, Dall’s Porpoises, and even a wolf paw print! YES!

I am getting nicely settled into life here in Ketchikan, and I will be writing more once I get the internet at my house. In the meanwhile, get your butt to Alaska. It is amazing!

Humpworthy Hump Day is a weekly feature where I share something that is, in figurative terms, worthy of a hump. Sweet, right? 

The Misty Fjords Are Humpworthy is a post from: Travel Junkette