Here’s a Greasemonkey/Tampermonkey script that would make The Grinch proud:

// ==UserScript==
// @name         Fresh Humbug
// @namespace    https://triggerhappy.me/2020/01/fresh-humbug/
// @downloadURL  https://triggerhappy.me/downloads/freshhumbug/freshhumbug.user.js
// @version      0.3
// @description  Get rid of the buggy Christmas theme that Freshservice forces on everyone
// @author       Eric Murphy
// @match        https://yourfreshserviceurl.example.com/*
// @grant        GM_addStyle
// @require     http://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/2.1.0/jquery.min.js

// ==/UserScript==

(function() {
    'use strict';
    $( document ).ready(function() {
        $(".snow_container").hide()
        $(".header").removeClass("christmas_theme_applied");
    });
})();

I probably could have done it without JQuery, but I only dabble in web programming these days, so that’s what I’m most familiar with.

Anyway, you’re welcome. Download it here!

I probably shouldn’t be so hard on myself. It was technically Auto Hotkey, but I only blame myself because I always try to find the most clever solution to every problem, and this was no exception. I set up an Auto Hotkey script to monitor and adjust the volume on my new mic, just like I had in the past with my Blue Snowball. The problem was, the script was doing something very strange with the volume. Instead of just adjusting the volume, it was also adjusting the balance of the mic. Yes, so every time I turned the volume up, it would also shift my recording to the right channel, and when turning the volume down, it would shift to the left channel. Absolutely bizarre!

To make matters worse, there is no way to see or change the balance settings for a mic in WIndows 10. To be honest, this was not surprising at all to me. That’s where Power Mixer comes into play.

Power Mixer

Power Mixer from Actual Solutions is a software volume mixer for Windows that gives you way more control over your sound devices. You can easily see the volume and balance of every device and application that is hooked into the OS. With one click, you can also enable or disable devices, which is much handier than attempting the same task in Windows.

Beyond simply giving you control over every aspect of your system’s audio, Power Mixer also allows you to monitor the sound going over each channel with VU and PPM meters. This is really handy if you need to be able to mix multiple channels and you want to keep an eye on your levels.

You can also assign hotkeys in Power Mixer to adjust volume, balance, and mute devices or other channels. Unfortunately, it only adjusts by increments of 20 though, so you’ll still need to pull up the mixer itself to do fine tuning. However, this fixed the problem I created when I was using Auto Hotkey to adjust my recording volume. No more balance shift when I touch my volume hotkeys!

Probably my favorite feature is the ability to define presets. You can set up presets for specific tasks, like gaming, working, streaming, etc. and switch between them. There doesn’t seem to be a way to quickly save a preset though, so you’ll have to pull up the preset screen to adjust any settings you’ve changed in the preset in order to make them permanent. That’s a little awkward, but once you set things up how you like them, you probably won’t be messing with that much anyway.

VolumeLock

Actual Software also has a solution for another audio pet peeve of mine. Don’t you hate it when Skype or some other voice chat software thinks it’s being smart by adjusting the input volume of your mic? When using a quality mic, it’s capable of picking up a lot of background noise if you’re not careful, and Skype and the like are notorious for thinking background noise, like a TV or children talking in the background, are important sound bits. As a result, they crank the input volume way up to pick up that background chatter, and then the next time you actually talk, you’re loud enough to blow out your friends’ speakers and eardrums. And even if you tell the offending program to not adjust the input volume, something inevitably does. So why not just prevent it entirely?

VolumeLock does just that. You set your levels where you want them, lock them independently, then forget it. For example, you can lock your input balance but leave your volume unlocked so that nothing will mess with your balance, but you can still adjust your volume from other programs. It has presets, just like Power Mixer, and hotkeys to jump to your different presets. All very good… in theory.

My issues with VolumeLock are a bit frustrating. It works great if all you want to do is lock your levels and set up presets. The problem is that it actually works against Power Mixer. You’d think these two applications should be combined or at least make them work together. Maybe set an exception for Power Mixer so that any other programs are prevented from adjusting your levels except for Power Mixer. Alas, that is not an option, so if you lock something in VolumeLock, it is the end-all be-all. You’re stuck going into VolumeLock to adjust and re-lock your levels.

The Verdict

While these applications have some glaring issues, I can definitely recommend Power Mixer at least. It’s very powerful and it is the best low-cost mixer I’ve been able to find. VolumeLock has great potential, but without better integration with Power Mixer, it really works against the best features of Power Mixer. This is unfortunate since they’re clearly developed by the same small developer, and even have some of the same features and appearance.

Disclaimer: I have written this review based on a 14-day trial of both applications with the assumption that I can acquire a 50% discount on the full license.

Requirements were clear:

• Stationary parallax scrolling (image stays stationary while other elements scroll over it)
• Images must be added/edited in the Squarespace online design tools (no hard-coding images here)
• Height of the “window” must be editable in the Squarespace online design tools as well
• Must be able to embed text over the images

After walking through a few examples online, I figured it shouldn’t be too hard to accomplish with some CSS and jQuery. I added several “poster” and “text” blocks to a page and plugged the following code into the page header. You could put this in code injection if you wanted this effect on every page.

<script src="//ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/1/jquery.min.js"></script>

<style>
html {
	overflow-x: hidden;
}
.image-inset {	
	background-attachment: fixed;
	background-position: center;
	background-repeat: no-repeat;
	background-size: cover;
	padding: 0px;
	border: 0px;
	width: 100vw;
	position: relative;
	left: 50%;
	right: 50%;
	margin-left: -50vw;
	margin-right: -50vw;
	overflow: hidden;
}
.sqs-block-image .image-block-outer-wrapper.image-block-v2 .intrinsic img {
	display: none;
}
.sqs-block-image .image-block-outer-wrapper.image-block-v2 .image-overlay {
	display: none;
}
</style>

<script>
$(document).ready(function(){
	$('.image-inset').each(function(i,e) {
		$(e).css('background-image', 'url("'+$(e).children('img')[0].src+'")');
	});
});
</script>

To get this to work on other templates, you might need to tweak the CSS a bit, but it should be doable.

The Problem

This morning, my girls wanted to play Kinect Party together, so I fired up the Xbox and tried to sign in under Emma’s account. It acted like I’d never signed in as her before and prompted for credentials. In the past, it had always accepted my account credentials for logging them in. Well that must have changed and I didn’t know her credentials. I skipped logging in and let them play. Then I went to my office and tried the same thing on my Xbox. I ended up resetting her password and that worked just fine.

If you’re having this problem with a child account, and don’t want to read all my ranting (I wouldn’t blame you), skip down to “The Solution” and save yourself some time.

THEN things got really interesting. Xbox said I had to add proofs. I’ve done this on my account and my wife’s, so whatever, punched in my digits, got a text message with the code, entered the code, done… right?

Nope, now I need to verify that proof by checking my email and clicking the link. *Groan* alright, whatever *click*.

Now I need to log in as Emma again. Alright, I’m in.

Now Emma needs her parents’ permission. She can either have an email sent or have her parent come to the PC. I’m already here, let’s do this.

Parent, log in. FOR FUCK’S SAKE. Ok, I’m in.

[paraphrase]Hey Eric, we know you’ve been an Xbox Live subscriber for 9 years, have a credit card on file, you’ve used that credit card dozens of times on our service, we’ve verified your identity and age numerous times, but we’re going to charge you 50 cents (don’t worry PART of it is going to charity… we won’t tell you WHICH charity) just to verify your age…[/paraphrase]

…

WHAT IN THE MOTHERFUCKING HELL?

At this point I’m on the verge of losing my shit, but I figured I can either contact support and give them an earful, or just deal with the 50 cent charge and get it over with. It’s only 50 cents, not that big of a deal, but still, it’s utter nonsense and I shouldn’t have to jump through all these hoops.

*Deep breath* ok, here’s my credit card number. Oh look, you’ve already filled in my address and phone number. Gosh, I guess you guys really do know me, so WHY AM I STILL DOING THIS? (And no, it wasn’t my browser filling it in)

*Submit*

We’re unable to complete your request
Microsoft account is experiencing technical problems. Please try again later.

Shit has been lost, folks.

They don’t even apologize for being incompetent. If it had said “We’re sorry…” I might not have been quite so mad. Ok, that’s a lie.

The Support Call

Ok, contact support time. They conveniently provided a link under the error, so I followed the link and filled in a support request. Here’s what I said:

When I attempt to verify my age using a credit card, it says “We’re unable to complete your request
Microsoft account is experiencing technical problems. Please try again later.

All I’m trying to do is log in to my two daughters’ Xbox Live accounts on our Xbox (their profiles are already on this Xbox). It’s telling me to add proofs, so I add my phone number, I get a text message with a code, enter it on the Xbox, then it tells me I have to verify that by checking my email. So I click the link you sent to my email, it tells me to log in to my kid’s account. Then it tells me (well, my kid) that she needs her parents permission. So I have to log back into the site with my credentials and for some reason I need to verify my age even though I’ve been an Xbox Live subscriber for 9 years and I’ve used credit cards on Xbox Live (and other Microsoft sites) many times before.

FOR SOME STUPID REASON YOUR SITE STILL REQUIRES THAT IT CHARGES ME 50 CENTS TO VERIFY MY AGE?!?!? You know who I am, you’ve verified my identity and age before. Why do I need to do it again in order to add proofs to my daughters’ accounts? Why is this process so much of a pain in the ass? Why doesn’t your credit card processing system work? Why do I need to pay 50 cents to do this?

This is why people complain about your service, don’t trust you, and leave you in favor of competitors. You make everything so god damned complicated and impossible. Like I said, I’ve been a subscriber for 9 years, and I’ve had to deal with a lot of ridiculous issues like this. I’m a very tech-savvy person, so these issues usually aren’t a big problem for me, but I can only wonder what the average user must go through, and how many of them GIVE UP because they get so frustrated with your policies and other nonsense (like me, right now).

Anyway, if you could help with the credit card issue, I’d appreciate it.

I’m so tired of big companies doing this BS. I appreciate that they take security seriously and encourage you to use two factor security and all that, but this is ridiculous. Microsoft has the ability to make this process as streamlined as possible, yet it requires all sorts of logging in/out, checking email, clicking links, verifying a dozen things we’ve already verified. It’s too much. The average user will not put up with this much nonsense. They’re going to give up, tell their kid they can’t use their profile anymore, or create a new profile. Both options heavily degrade the user’s experience to the point that they’ll start looking elsewhere for entertainment. Microsoft, and other companies (they’re not the only offenders), need to get their heads out of their asses and fix this.

Oh, it gets better. While typing this post, I got a response from support:

Dear Eric Murphy,

Thank you for contacting Windows Live Hotmail Plus Billing Support. [Wow, is that who I contacted? That’s quite the name. -EM]

We sincerely apologize for the inconvenience you encountered in trying to complete the age verification process. To further assist you in getting an accurate resolution to this issue, We need to direct you to www.answers.microsoft.com where you will be given a step by step direction by a Moderator. You can also use our xbox chat support at http://support.xbox.com/en-US/contact-us?xr=footnav.

You can also try the following links:
1. http://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/Search/Search?SearchTerm=live+age+verification&CurrentScope.ForumName=&CurrentScope.Filter=&askingquestion=False
2. http://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/windowslive/forum/liveid-signin/how-do-i-change-the-dob-for-a-child-account/9e202b21-8b9a-4ed2-92d4-2014a2dbe0ea

To further explain why Microsoft charge you when creating an account for a child in compliance to Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA), please visit our website at http://windows.microsoft.com/en-US/windows-live/family-safety-why-does.

Windows Live Hotmail Plus Billing Support do not have any fix for Windows Live Age verification. Rest assured that we value your feedback and whatever issues our customers encounter online will be fixed.

Sincerely,

Wianne
Windows Live Hotmail Plus Billing Support

The two links given are amusing. The first one is a huge list of posts on their answers forums from people experiencing the same issues with the credit card system. The second explains why this step is needed and provides alternate methods for verifying your age. They are… wait for it… FAX, or MAIL. That’s snail mail, not email. As in put your sensitive info (photocopy of your driver’s license) in an envelope, write the address on it, slap a stamp on it, drop it in a mailbox and wait a couple weeks for it to be delivered and processed. Granted, this is probably due to COPPA, but it’s still a load of crap. Microsoft, how about you fix your damn credit card processing so I don’t need to deal with this?

At this point, I think it’s ridiculous that customer service is sending me to a different division of support to handle this, and they’re not even passing the torch. They’re just saying “not our problem, ask these guys” and sending me on my way. No, Microsoft, no. This is not service, this is lazy.

Since I’ve never liked answers.microsoft.com for dealing with this type of thing, I started an Xbox chat support session. I was connected to Francis and he was very helpful. I had to explain the issues twice to him but I think part of it was me not quite understanding that I shouldn’t have had to go through any of this nonsense to begin with. He said child accounts don’t need to set up proofs since you log in with the parent’s account credentials (see, I knew that didn’t seem right).

The Solution

The solution Francis provided seemed absurd at first. He told me to delete MY profile (the parent of the child accounts), download the parent profile again, and then the child accounts should log in without the prompts to add proofs.

Well dagnabbit, it worked. Emma’s profile logged in instantly using my credentials. Then I downloaded Payton’s profile and it logged in instantly. Cool. Then I tried the same thing on my other Xbox. I didn’t have as much luck there. I deleted/re-downloaded my account, but still had the same problem with the child accounts. I deleted and re-downloaded the child accounts, same problem. Then I deleted and re-downloaded my account AGAIN, and suddenly stuff started working again. I still had a weird problem with Payton’s account, but turning off/on the Xbox solved that. Might have been a fluke connection problem or something.

Closing

Anyway, after all is said and done, both accounts are able to log in to the Xbox, but if they ever need to do anything on a different Microsoft website, I imagine I’ll still need to verify my age and give them access. I can’t believe it’s 2013 and the internet/technology is STILL such a clusterfuck when it comes to credentials, parental controls, and credit card transaction processing. I can’t believe I wasted four hours on a Saturday to get my girls signed in to Xbox Live. I’m just glad I opted to contact Xbox support and that Francis knows his shit. I guess Xbox caused the problem to begin with, but at least they were able to identify the issue and correct it without too much hassle. This has been one incredibly frustrating experience.

Here it is! mx610hack-0.3.tar

Disclaimer: I had this working in an old version of Ubuntu but haven’t even tested it with anything more recent yet. It did compile so that’s a start!

I should also mention that I did not write this code. I’m just sharing it because it seems to be hard to find these days. The original source seems to be here: http://blogs.kde.org/node/2029

Happy Birthday Emma!

Last week Erika dug up a bunch of older photos and re-edited them so there were a lot of photos to choose from. There are some good older photos but I picked a new one instead. This photo of Emma is so cute. She’s always making silly faces but capturing those moments is always difficult. I think this photo turned out great.

See Silly Girl at Flickr.

See Untitled at Flickr.

See Untitled at Flickr.