Trouble Doubled

So long, and thanks for all the fish

2014-06-28T22:40:00.001+01:00

The time has come to delete this blog.

For personal reasons, I am shutting it down within the next week.

I started it on a whim back in January 2011 just a few weeks before the twins were born. They are now three years old and at pre-school two days a week.

I love blogging. I've met some brilliant people, both online and off. I've chatted to some in the middle of the night during a four-person tummy bug bout. I've laughed and laughed over stupid things on Twitter, and I've made some wonderful friends.

My posts have been varied, from employing a nanny, general rants, product reviews, and things I've learnt about being a parent along the way. To be honest, I'm going to miss this space. I've not achieved any awards, or blogging plaudits for it, but I know I've helped one or two other parents going through similar things, and needing reassurance that they are normal. You are normal. Each and every one of you.

Thank you to anyone whose subscribed, read a post, left a comment, and kept me going through sleepless nights with jokes about snot and pictures of lollipops shaped like willies. I appreciate each and every one of you taking the time to connect with me, and try to understand my overlong rantings.

I apologise for the broken links that some people are going to now find on their blogs. Sorry. In three years I've left a trail, and made many connections with bloggers new and established. I hope it's not too much effort to delete the links that were kindly thrown my way.

I'll still have email, and I might keep the Twitter account going for a while. I dropped Facebook ages ago as you may have noticed.

To explain......me and The Dad are going through a very bumpy patch. Three years of parenting four feisty and energetic girls is taking its toll. We've said things that can't be unsaid. I don't know where we're going from here. I do know that I'm very nervous about anyone finding this blog. I can't afford anything to be used against me in the future, especially anything that might affect the girls.

We may work things out, we may not. But whatever happens, I've enjoyed having this space to connect with others and to have the requisite cathartic rants. For those that know me well, you know where to find me. I thank all of those that have got to know me on a more personal level for never having the inclination to blow my identity and use anything against me. I am sad that I can't have that same faith in others in the outside world looking to cause trouble. So, I have to go.

So long, and thanks for all the belly laughs, virtual cake, and very real hugs when we have finally met.

This message, and blog, will self-destruct in five days.

What parenting twins has taught me.....

2014-05-26T20:39:00.000+01:00

Having twins. Sometimes it's a lot of fun, sometimes less so.

It is, however, a learning curve of the steeper kind. I, the parent, am here to teach the children, but often it feels like they are teaching me. You can't buy this sort of education. I get it for free, lucky me!

Lessons for life

1 - You can't please all of the people all of the time.

Whether it's a disagreement of what we should watch on the TV right now, or where to go for food, there's always one that will get what they want, and one which will be disappointed (and probably have a tantrum). That's life. Shit happens. They have to deal with it, and so do I. And I am taught that the age old proverb about not being able to please everyone is absolutely correct.

2 - Personalities are inbuilt.

My two little almost-identical people are different characters. They've been brought up the exact same way, in almost every little detail, yet they don't react the same way to the same thing. It has taught me that personality is pre-programmed into everyone, and there's no point trying to change someone to suit you. You have to adapt your actions to the little person you are dealing with. Same with big people too.

3 - Humanity is endlessly generous yet dumb as shit all at the same time.

Having twins has prompted many people to come forward to assist me at various points. Friends have turned up with hand-me-down clothes, offers of taking older children to school and school events, offers to help with housework. Strangers help me when out and about; opening doors, passing things from the shelves in the supermarkets when I can't get anywhere near, having kind words to say to the frazzled woman who looks like shit (i.e. me).

Having twins also makes you realise just how stupid other people are, and just how many people are not afraid to engage their brain (if they can) before speaking. I've had everything from people telling me that twins would be their worst nightmare, to people asking why, if they are girl/girl, have I dressed them differently. I honestly have no answers for some people.

4 - Children develop at their own pace

Whether it's toilet training, or learning to feed themselves, they'll do what they want when they are ready. Generally, what they will do is a mix of in-built programming, and a little of encouragement, but I've found there's no point pushing for something when they're not ready, and that some children are ready before others. That's just the way it is.

5 - Parenting is hard. Parenting twins is even more so.

Parenting is hard enough. Parenting children close together in age has its challenges, as does parenting children with special needs - parenting twins is challenging too. Yes, it's also rewarding, but for too many days the downs massively outnumber the ups. Parenting twins is driving me to breaking point. They are at an age where exploration and pushing the boundaries is what they do best. But they regularly do it separately - while I'm trying to stop one flushing the entire toilet roll away, the other is emptying the Coco Pops over the dining room table. I'm getting very frustrated with the constant fire-fighting technique I'm having to adopt just to get through the day with the house not burnt down/flooded/adorned like a priceless Jackson Pollock. It's tiring and it's putting a huge strain on our relationship. I don't want to become another statistic. Twin parents have a significantly (in a statistical sense) higher divorce rate than other parents. I can see why. Parenting twins is testing my patience to the limits. But we're hanging on in there. We know it gets easier.

So there you are - five lessons that parenting twins has taught me. We're still smiling. Just about.

Blog Your Heart Out

2014-04-15T18:56:00.000+01:00

Thank you to Donna of Little Lily Pad for the tag!

I now have to answer some questions about me and blogging. So here goes.....

Who or what encouraged you to start blogging?

My inner voice, who thought it was a brilliant idea. Up until starting this blog I had no idea that parent blogs existed, or that there was a wonderful community to be part of. I knew of Blogger through another project that I had been involved with, and I just thought it was a good (free) platform to enable me to share my thoughts and experiences with new parents. It grew from there really.

How did you choose what to blog about?

At first, it was easy - I was about to have twins to add to two other children. For me it was about how twin parenting is different from singleton parenting, and how to cope with a family that was to be unintentionally larger than the average.

What is something most people don't know about you?

After three and a half years of blogging, I don't think there's much left that readers don't know about me really. Even regular readers who have become friends know my real name and whereabouts I live. Being anonymous means there's some things I've never been able to share, and some things I can overshare. What I can share, I have.

OK, let's dig something up...........On the Meyers-Briggs personality test, I am INTJ, which is the rarest of personality groups, especially for females. In the female population, I am 1-in-100. Others think I can be a bit of an oddbod, but I am just me. And there are thousands of others out there just like me (officially) so I can't be that bad. Hopefully.

If you want to find out your personality type, then this is a good site.

What three words describe your style?

Blogging wise I assume? Infrequent, lazy, rambling

What do you love to do when you are not blogging?

Blogging I love to do when I'm not doing everything else. Blogging is the hobby for me. I fit it in around the children, parent governor-ing, running a playgroup, doing my freelance work, and generally trying (and sometimes failing) to keep a lid on everything.

Who wants to be tagged?

I tag......

Johnsons Babies

Lost on The Cloud

You're not from round here

And anyone else who wants to join in!

A poem

2014-04-01T13:29:00.001+01:00

A little poetic interlude for you

Review: Great Gismos 4M Green Science Dynamo Torch

2014-03-30T21:09:00.000+01:00

This term, Trouble One has been learning about electricity at school so we thought it would be a good opportunity to try out this dynamo torch kit from Green Science.

I left Trouble One (who is now nine) to do it on her own, and she needed my help in understanding how to read instructions, but could do the assembly bit on her own. The product is not recommended for children under 3 due to small parts, but is probably best for children aged 8 and over.

I will hand you over to T1 and she can tell you all about it herself

"When my mum was sent a Dynamo Eco-Friendly Torch I was eager to get on and make some light! It was fun to assemble but I sometimes needed help from Mum.

The screwing was quite easy, once I lined everything up properly. A screwdriver is not included so you will need one handy.

TIP: the screws are rather small and fiddly, so you really do need a screwdriver!

When you are assembling the cogs they have to be precisely in the correct place, so that they don’t slip and stop the light from lighting.

I give this kit a four-and-a-half out of five!"

Basically, there is everything in the kit you need to make a dynamo torch apart from the screwdriver - you will need a thin phillips one. The instructions are fairly straightforward and is explained with text and a diagram.

T1 really enjoyed doing this kit. There's not much to it but it really helped her understand the relationship between cogs, motors, and bulbs.

Here's the dynamo torch in action....

Disclosure - we were sent the kit free of charge to be able to do this review. The links below are affiliate.

Amazon.co.uk Widgets

Sisterly love.

2014-03-26T22:46:00.001Z

Just recently the older two girls have been getting on amazingly well. To be honest, I've been a bit worried.

Like, I think they're up to something kind of worried.

The older two girls, aged 9 and 6, have rarely had a period in the last six years where they haven't been at loggerheads. Even from T2 being a baby, they were at war. Every playtime would sooner or later morph into an opportunity for T2 to wallop T1 over the head with something, or for T1 to verbally bash T2 into some ear-wrenching session which only comes to an end when something collides inexplicably with T1's head.

Last year, after a period of turmoil caused through extension building and the arrival of the twins, we got so sick of the arguing that we turned our tiny fourth bedroom into T2's new bedroom. She loves her new bedroom. We got her a high sleeper with wardrobe and drawers underneath, and apart from a narrow bookshelf is pretty much all that can fit in there. We decorated the room with Hello Kitty wall transfers, and Hello Kitty curtains, and Hello Kitty posters. I lost an office and general storage/dumping ground in the process, but she was happy. The arguments didn't stop completely, but they at least stopped at bedtime, which was a step in the right direction.

They spend every waking minute finding a way of falling out, and of getting each other into trouble with me, or whoever will listen. They kick each other slyly when passing. They glare at each other across the dining table until one of them snaps and gets themselves into my bad books. Then the other sniggers victoriously. They sprag the other one up even before the other one has had chance to do the misdemeanor they are being spragged up for.

Last week, we noticed we hadn't seen or heard any falling out for a few days. We couldn't honestly remember the last time we had had to separate the girls. Then T2 moved back into the shared bedroom and took to sleeping on the bottom bunk again. We felt a bit weird.

I noticed a kind of peace descend over our house. They were playing nicely together, helping each other out on the computer, T2 sitting while T1 brushed her hair, and passing each other with a polite excuse me rather than a sharp kick in the shins. They are definitely up to something.

Today I found out what. T1 wants an xbox, and we have said no. She is saving up for one on her own but knows it won't be enough. So she's convinced T2 that she wants the xbox too. They are working together and clubbing all their money up to buy one themselves. It's admirable. It'll take them a while. I think so far they have saved about £7.50 but I won't discourage it.

They ask to do housework for money. It's ace! So far this week, they've brought in two loads of washing, put their laundry in the washing machine, unloaded the dishwasher a couple of times, and have worked together to set the table for tea. It's cost me about £2 and it was worth every penny.

Here's to lasting peace. I think I should get them to sign a treaty while they're out of the war zone.

The dreaded pox.

2014-03-12T13:39:00.001Z

We've all been a bit ill recently. We've all had varying effects of some virus or other. Twin two has been hit especially hard, as always, but T1 and T2 have also each had a day off school. Even The Dad has developed a bit of man flu.

We were at the docs on Friday with the twins. Mainly because twin 2 had broken out in a rash and her temperature was all over the place. The doc was happy it was a viral rash and advised calpol until she felt better again.

Then yesterday (Tuesday) we noticed a few blistery spots, worse on twin 2, naturally, who was also developing a sore and sticky eye. With no improvement the following morning, we rang the doctors again and he fit us straight in to his morning surgery.

The news on the eye was what we were expecting - conjunctivitis. But the rash surprised us, me especially. He said it was most definitely chicken pox, and I was amazed. Yes the spots look blistery but they don't have very many of them and they've come on so gradually. I remember when T1 was two years old and I'd dropped her off at nursery at 8am only for them to call at lunchtime to ask me to go collect her, by which time she had the pox on every single part of her body. Yep, every part.

And I'd never seen a child so covered in spots than when T2 was three years old. There were spots on spots, and she still has the scars now. It was horrid.

This time round, the twins seem to have got away with it on the spots front. Twin two, who is the worst, has no more than about 30 spots on her whole body, which is nothing. She has a nasty one on her head which will probably scar, but nothing much of concern. They're also both up and about playing and eating as normal.

We have watched a lot of telly this morning - including the new episode of Topsy and Tim where they get chicken pox. We've watched that at least twice already. We are preparing for quarantine for a few days. Luckily, I haven't got much on this week so we should be ok for a lot of slob time.

So please stay away. We have painted a black cross on our door so you know not to come close. Unless you want to come to our chicken pox/stir-crazy party, in which case, come in, welcome to the crazy!

What my kids could do in an empty room.

2014-03-12T13:15:00.001Z

The theoretical empty room. Nothing in it. Nada. Zilch. Here's what my kids would still be able to do.

Find something to argue over.

Find something to fiddle with so that another of them can dob them in to me.

Find something to inexplicably fall over.

Find somewhere convenient to lose yet more bobbles/hair grips/socks.

Find something to complain to me about.

Find something to use as a weapon against one of their sisters.

Catch bloody chicken pox.

Lose their PE kit/favourite toy/reading book.

Find a pen. And a sofa. Again.

Find an entire bottle of nail varnish and paint their hands completely, front and back.

Spill something.

Find something else to argue over.

Kids. Gotta love 'em.

Pigs by Kids - update

2014-02-13T21:00:00.000Z

Do you remember the Pigs by Kids campaign by Natwest which wanted children to design the new official Natwest piggy bank?

We entered it (twice over) and this week, as a thank you for our creativity, we were sent two very special gifts. They are soft toy replicas of our crafted prototype pigs.

It is amazing how much they look like our designs, and the girls absolutely adore them. They are taking them in to show in assembly this week.

Our original designs are here....

What do you think of them?

You can follow news about the new Natwest pig Pigby using the hashtag #PigbyandFriends

The final nail.

2014-02-12T20:35:00.000Z

This week I put the final nail in my coffin for following my ambition to get a PhD and start on a career in academia - I withdrew my last pending paper from my university's journal - and it feels good!

It shouldn't feel good. But it does. I think.

Basically, in my final weeks at university as a mature student back in 2006, my supervisor casually mentioned that if I didn't feel I was done, they were taking applications for students to do a 1+3 studentship (which is basically a recognised masters degree, followed by a three-year PhD programme, all fully funded). To be honest, I wasn't done with studying. I'd gone back to university as a 26-year old, sought-after print professional to do something completely random and I'd loved it. When I graduated I was an almost 30-year old mother of a toddler with a first-class honours degree, being only one of two students to get a first on my degree programme. Studying suited me. It didn't suit my bank balance, but as a woman with a young child, and a husband in a full-time job, studying was challenging with enough flexibility to make things work.

I made some casual enquiries with a post-grad student I knew to talk to, and she, as a fellow mother herself, convinced me that it was a good move. With full funding and a tax-free stipend equivalent to a full-time job, it was a no-brainer, even if I didn't know what I wanted to do afterwards. I gave up studying for finals, and started pulling together a research proposal. I got my supervisor to sign it, convinced a lecturer who knew my face to second it, and sent it off.

With finals done, and results in, I got down to the last three for the department's studentship, and completely bombed the interview. Again. I hate interviews. By the time the preferred student hadn't shown up, and they gave me a second chance to bid for the position, I was pregnant with T2. I turned them down. I didn't have time for this now.

In the meantime, I'd applied for studentships at two other Yorkshire universities and came close on both occasions - one rang to tell me I was the panel's second choice on a 3-2 split! I had looked into selling our house and moving us all lock, stock, and barrel to a city 70 miles away. I was so convinced I was going.

After the birth of T2, I got a job with the local authority but I continued to look into studentships. None seemed to suit, especially now I had two children to worry about and pay childcare for. I needed something close to home, and that meant looking at opportunities at my local university only. I knew it would be tough and competitive but I was determined. Had I the option of being able to uproot at a week's notice and take a position at the other end of the country, or abroad even, then who knows? Bit I didn't, so its, well, academic.

Then I spotted an interesting project with funding for one year, leading to a masters degree at Durham University, which is at least a two hour drive away. But Durham! As a child from a very working class background where any university wasn't an option, here I was suddenly eligible to go to one considered third only to Oxford and Cambridge. I applied. I got it. I quit my stable job and embarked on an academic path once more.

Working mainly from home, and commuting to Durham for supervisory visits, I carried out the research, and my new supervisors helped me look into extending the 1 into a 1 + 3. Nothing seemed to work out, but my supervisors and I kept a look out for any opportunities. At the end of the twelve months, and pregnant with the twins, I handed in my thesis and waited for graduation. Then nothing. I had nothing to go to. No job. No academic position. I was now a stay-at-home mum to my family which had now doubled in size.

But I kept in touch with my supervisors. I spoke at a postgraduate conference at Durham University on my specialist subject. I started writing a paper for the journal that would be produced from the conference. This was in 2011, the year the twins were born.

I also started co-authoring a paper with my supervisors. They were a brilliant support and with their weight behind it, it had a good chance of getting published. We finished it after weeks of to-ing and fro-ing by email, and submitted it to my supervisors' first choice journal. It took weeks, months even. It got rejected because the topic wasn't suitable for the journal. We chose a more suitable journal, edited the paper, sent it for approval. It got a lot of criticism. Criticism that we couldn't address because my research didn't fit their questions. I knew I was right on my findings but because the subject is new and specialist, the journal had too many questions and we weren't giving what it considered to be the right answers. Sounds like excuses now, but they aren't. I stand by everything that I did. I know I'm not wrong, but I'm not in the business of trying to convince those who think they know better. That's their problem, and with four children to care for and a house to run, I certainly didn't have time to waste doing it.

We submitted the paper to a journal of my suggestion. It took months to come back, and only after we chased them. This is now 2013, three years after I did the initial research. To say things drag on in academia is an understatement. The main criticism of my research was that it was out of date. Go figure! We withdrew the paper. The last email I sent to my supervisor was me saying I haven't got time for any more re-writes, as well she hasn't. We're in touch but not much.

Before Christmas, I received an email from the university journal with some questions about the paper I submitted after the 2011 conference. Two years later. I answered them as best I could and resubmitted. They sent it back with more questions. I returned saying I couldn't answer them as my research showed what it showed, and I couldn't re-do it or re-visit it to make my research fit what they wanted it to say.

They gave me some 'friendly' advice which was basically a nice way of saying that if I wanted to succeed in academia, I had to toe the line. And that was it. I knew there and then what I think I had known all along - I didn't want to succeed in academia. So I did what I do when something in my life is proving problematic. I got rid.

I had pursued it because the practical side of me knew it could be a good lifestyle choice at the time, and I felt I had something to prove. I now know that I don't have to prove anything to anyone, and certainly not to people who only like to hear what fits their thinking.

I know I don't have the personality to last very long in an academic world. I am too much of a lone-ranger, and quickly lose respect for those who eke stupid. I have little respect for authority, preferring to judge others on their actions rather than an arbitrary title. Academia is as full of stupids as it is of intellects. While I may crave the approval of the proven eggheads, I haven't got the patience to work through the stupids to get there. In any case, I may turn out to be one of the stupids I detest so much. I will end up throat-punching someone before the end of the first semester. I lasted less than a year at the council. I don't see why an academic institution would fare much better.

And at almost 40 years old, do I really want to be starting my new career as a junior researcher? I'll only have 20 or so years left in me after that. A lot of academics take this long even to get to junior lecturer level. I should have taken the decision long ago - a PhD is not a good investment for me, mentally, or as a career booster. The degrees were, in a lot of respects, a waste of time. As a development tool, they were amazing and I'd do it all over again. As a career tool, I should have stayed in printing. I haven't earned as much as I did when I was 25 years old, childfree and without any letters after my name whatsoever.

Career-wise, I have all the professional flexibility I need right now. I have taken up freelancing and can turn down work as much as I need to. I can concentrate on my family while having something to challenge me mentally at times when I am ready for those challenges. I have my clients - happy clients who pay.

Most of all, I have my girls. While a big part of me wanted to succeed to show them that women can do just as well as men in academia, I can't justify bringing us all down to prove a point.

I'm a bit sad about it all. I'm happy too. The word I think I'm looking for is relief. It is, yes. Relief.

How to bulk make and freeze mince pies.

2013-12-19T22:08:00.000Z

It's that time of year again when everyone turns to Christmas shopping, and I turn to mince pies.

If truth be told, I started buying and eating them a couple of weeks ago at least. I do love a good mince pie.

Anyway, last year I decided that I ate so many of them, that I should make them in bulk and freeze them. It worked out really well so I thought I'd share it with you in time for this Christmas.

This is what you do.....

You will need.

32 ounces of Self-raising flour

8 ounces of lard/fat

8 ounces of margarine or butter

4 ounces of caster sugar

cold water

This will make approximately 48 mince pies, for which you will also need 1200g of mincemeat.

You also need bun trays, and plastic storage containers or freezer bags.

First mix the sugar and flour together, and then rub in the lard and margarine with your fingers. You may want to split the mixture and prepare it in two lots, unless you've got a huge mixing bowl and arms like Popeye.

Then roll out the mixture and cut bottoms for the pies with a round cutter and pop them in the tray. To get 48 pies out of the mixture, you need to roll it quite thin. The pastry will rise during cooking so you can get away with very thin dough.

'scuse the battered trays - they have been used A LOT!

Fill each bottom with a teaspoon of mincemeat.

Then cut some tops either with a slightly smaller cutter, or a shaped one, like a star or bell.

Put the tops on. DO NOT GLAZE!

THIS IS THE POINT AT WHICH YOU FREEZE THEM!

Put the whole tray into the freezer and leave overnight to freeze. Once the pies are solid, pop them out of the tray and store them in the freezer in the plastic containers or freezer bags. You only need the bun trays for this stage so borrow them if you can. 48 pies is four trays so you'll have to do them in shifts if you can't get hold of four.

When you want to eat the mince pies, fill a tray with frozen pies, let them defrost for a couple of hours at room temperature, glaze with an egg, and then bake in the oven as normal at 200 degrees for 20 minutes.

And there you have it - freshly baked mince pies any time you want them for the least effort.

Enjoy!

This is the cost breakdown if you're interested...........

Mincemeat sells at Tesco for approx £1 per 400 g (so 1200g = £3)

Flour is approx 30p

Margarine/Butter = £1
Sugar is approx 30p

so £4.60 for 48 mince pies, which is less than 10p each (plus the cost of the oven).

Review: Woolly and Tig - the App for iPad

2013-12-19T21:39:00.000Z

This week, we have been testing a new app - Woolly and Tig - on the iPad.

It is based on the TV show of the same name. The app involves a very toddler-friendly spider called Woolly, who asks you to tickle him, and help him roll over. The game needs audio to work as all Woolly's instructions are verbal.

There are six activities to play which are to get Woolly dressed, brush his teeth, wash his muddy face (which is the twins' favourite), fun in the rain, fun in the sun, and fun in the snow.

Each game is very simple and is easy for toddlers to handle. The twins (almost three years old) became experts in every activity after a couple of turns each. Woolly is a little slow to react - but only a little - and it does not detract from the play value. There's not much that Woolly can do each time, which is great for toddlers who tend to have fat finger issues and start jabbing the screen all over the place.

The graphics are bright and fun, and the twins really love playing with Woolly. Trouble Two (six years old) likes playing it too.

The app costs £2.99 which is ok. The twins have had a few hours play each on it so far and they really enjoy it. They can do it without supervision too as there's not much they can fiddle with, which is good for if I need to nip out to the loo or put dinner on.

There is a parents area where you can set times to help your child learn routine - you can set the teeth brushing time for example, and co-ordinate brushing Woolly's teeth with your child's. As far as I can see, it sends a notification to your device to remind you when the time comes, but that's about it.

The app uses up a lot of power and crashed a few times when we first downloaded it but it seems to have settled down now.

Overall, the twins really like their new 'spider game' and I would recommend it for fans of Woolly and Tig the TV show.

Disclosure - We were sent a small payment to cover the cost of the app and a Woolly and Tig goody bag to enjoy.

I am sick of bloody breakfast

2013-11-18T14:08:00.000Z

Breakfast. I hate it. I've never got in with it really. It's too early in the morning for a start off. I can't do cereals, and toast just gets boring. The only food i really like at breakfast is cooked - fried egg, beans, hash browns - but I just don't have the time or the energy at that time to do anything other than shove cereal in a bowl.

It's starting to cause a real stress at our house, especially on a school morning. The twins have got to the stage where they want to pour their own cereal out, which results in a right mess. Then they decide they don't really want it anyway, and start throwing it at each other and on the floor. Then they want to climb out of their high chairs and sit on the big chairs at the table. I give in, hoping it will get them to eat the what cereal is still in their bowl. It does, but not for long, after they've poked it around a bit, they decide to up and run round the kitchen, which is fine if they're not coming in the school run with me, but if they are, it's a race against the clock to get them back in their chairs and eating.

All the while, poor T2 is trying to finish her breakfast (she's the most painfully slow eater in the world), and I'm clearing up after T1 who despite her 9 years on this planet, still cannot eat cereal without getting milk all over the table.

This is of course, after they've decided what they're going to be eating. their favourite cereal seems to change with the wind. the Dad has also got a real bee in his bonnet about the cereal cupboard. They're not allowed to have more than 2 or 3 boxes on the go at once for fear of overspill. And of course, they don't agree on which 2 or 3 they should be eating right now, so that causes no end of arguments.

They don't want toast. There's no time to cook and eat anything other than a few beans. And leaving the twins to feed themselves results in so much mess we end up being late for school because I have to spend some time at least giving them a wipe down.

What I should do is go to bed early, get up early and prepare them a wholesome fruit salad, or cook some nice sausages. Or something. I've read about people who do this sort of thing.

Or someone could invent something that is yummy, suits everyone's tastes, is quick to make, and is not one bit messy. There's definitely a gap in the market, and It would make millions, I tell you!

What's breakfast like at your house?

Nine to five....what a way to make a living!

2013-11-01T21:34:00.001Z

Sorry if I've not been around much recently. If you weren't aware, I've been working. I know!

Me. The professional. Not really.

Since spring, I have been working from home as a freelancer. I do social media for others, and have recently picked up some online content writing work. Last week I built my very first website for a local entrepreneur, and I have been helping an old work colleague doing some data analysis for her new company. It's all very exciting.

It started off as a few hours a week for one client, and it's slowly built up. Some days I don't know if I'm coming or going. I'm doing it all without paid childcare and, I'll be honest, it's bloody hard work.

Working from home has its pros and cons. It is very different from going to work, having your own office, and being left in peace to do what you need to do for eight hours solid, five days a week.

Specifically it means......

No commuting! No travel expenses. No lost time.

Not having to wear clean work clothes. If I get yoghurt/toddler snot/chocolate/toothpaste on my clothes, I wipe it off, say 'meh' and carry on.

I can be here to be occasionally interrupted by visitors. OK, it means I can take in the parcels and things to save trips back out to the sorting office later, but also means I get asked for favours and borrows, or are just here as a chatting service for the neighbours.

I have to wait until The Dad is out of bed before I can start work. Or wait until all the children are in bed. Or until my in-laws turn up to take the twins out for the afternoon.

It means I can be here to do the school run in an afternoon, and to do parents evenings, or assemblies, or for whatever else school seems to need my attendance.

It means I can drop everything mid-task to drive to the motorbike garage to pick up The Dad after he's dropped it off for its MOT. It also means I can drop him back off at the same garage later to pick it up again.

It means I have to do my own invoicing at the end of every month, and a tax return after each financial year.

It means I can keep up with my commitments of being a school governor, and running the local playgroup.

It means I can spend time with the children, and have the flexibility to reduce my working time during the school holidays (even if it doesn't actually work out that way).

It means I am in a constant relationship with the fridge.

It means I'm staying up until silly o'clock to get things finished off.

It means I don't get paid if I don't do the work set, and that's including if my internet goes down and I have to spend forty minutes on the phone to the broadband provider to sort it out.

It means I can stop for the odd game of Candy Crush, or a quick flick through Pinterest.

It means I can stop work, prepare lunch or tea, and then carry on working for another half-hour while it cooks.

It means I can put another load of washing on, hang the last lot out, and then load/unload the dishwasher.

It means that, in a six-hour period between the two school runs, I get about two hours worth of billable work completed. On a good day.

And after all that, it means that it's actually worth working. If I was to work full-time and pay for childcare, I'd be worse off than running round like a mad woman to earn a few quid a day. In all of this, I work for between ten and fourteen hours a week, at best, which makes me more of a 'profit' than if I went back out and worked in my former profession.

It's the crazy madness that is my life at the moment, and I wouldn't change a thing.

Ooh, and I have just won a bid to do some more work for a new client next week.......awesome sauce!

If appliances could talk........

2013-10-23T13:14:00.000+01:00

Do you think very much about your appliances when you buy your washing machine from the store, or when you buy your fridge-freezer online? Did you think about how it will fit in with your family?

Our appliances are such a central part of our lives, it’s almost like sometimes they ARE family. I think all appliances should have little smiley faces on them like the vacuum. Mind you, one thing I am grateful for is that they can’t talk!

For a start, what would my oven say to me? Would it ask me why I am having a constant affair with the microwave? Does it inwardly question my menu choices, or critique my cooking ability? Would it ask why I was doing frozen pies again, or beg me to clean its wire trays more often?

My fridge-freezer may rue that its handle is broken – the result of Trouble Two tugging on it too hard - though it also might express gratitude that we rescued it from neglect when its previous owners moved house and didn’t have room for it in their new place. I wonder if it likes having little things stuck all over its front – school newsletters, photos from day trips, supermarket coupons, and other items that signify its status as a family fridge-freezer. I wonder if it hankers after the life of its counterparts in single-person households, or quite enjoys being stuffed with jars of jam, chocolate bars, and cartons of fruit juice perfect for packed lunches.

My washing machine would probably shout at me. It’s very busy, as you can imagine. It would get angry and demand a holiday, or freedom from slavery. It would, if it ever got chance. Its mouth is always full. Instead it whirrs angrily at me. Usually during the spin cycle.

My steamer would demand an apology. I got cross with Trouble Two at tea-time yesterday and dropped one of the baskets, which is now broken. Oops. I would be in BIG trouble with that one.

The toaster – ahh, the toaster. Being a Red Dwarf fan, I am glad our toaster cannot talk. If you don’t know the reference on this then be gone with you! Crumpet?

The tumble dryer, I imagine, is quite a happy fellow. He does his thing in the winter and then pretty much gets all summer off. He has to put up with the occasional spillage from the diners at the table, but otherwise he’s cool with it all. He’s probably got a hipster voice, and only speaks when spoken to. I don’t know why I think the tumble dryer should be a he, but he is.

The slow cooker has an old lady voice. She spends most of her days at the back of the darkest kitchen cupboard and is wheeled out whenever I get a busy day and she reliably does her thing without grumbling. She’s also very old, being a hand-me-down from the mother-in-law. Her lid went missing some time ago so we got her a new one that fits but is not very co-ordinated. It’s nice and shiny, and it looks a bit out of place. Would she whine about it? Probably. The whinging old bag.

The dishwasher would be a chatty sort, I imagine. It’d complain a lot about me putting egg covered bowls in, and not washing the food entirely off the plates before loading them, but it does get the best dishwashing tablets we can buy (on a buy-one-get-one-free!). Mainly though, it’d shout at the twins for fiddling with its buttons and dial. They are obsessed with it. To be honest, I think most of my appliances would have something to say about the twins.

If the appliances ever had a group discussion, do you think they’d be complimentary about my domestic talents? Do they even like me? Do they think I need to get out of the house a bit more often?

What do you think? If your appliances could talk, what would they say?

Disclosure – this is a sponsored post

How to make soft spiders for Halloween

2013-10-09T11:28:00.000+01:00

This is a craft thing we started for Halloween last year and didn't finish. But now we have. Don't judge. I never promised you I was the best crafter in the world. I think all you craft bloggers are safe on your thrones for now.

We have been making soft body spiders.

You need:

felt (black for the body, and white or whatever for the features)

8 pipe cleaners (for legs)

toy stuffing

needle and thread

fabric scissors

First cut two spider body shapes out of black felt, and some spidery features out of the other colour. We used white but you can use whatever colour you want.

First sew the features in place on one piece of felt using a needle and thread. Make sure you do them all because once you've sewn the spider together, it's more difficult to add things on.

Then take the pipe cleaners and bend the end of each one back on itself a little (about 2cm is fine). This is so that when you sew them in they don't fall out. Place each leg in position (four on each side, naturally!) and sew on to the second body part nice and tight. Put the thread through and around the bended-back parts of the pipe cleaners so they are secured inside the spider.

Then put the front and back pieces together, and sew around the edges. Leave a hole so that you can put the stuffing in later.

Then stuff with toy stuffing, and sew up the hole, and you're done.

Don't know what they're good for, but they are very cute*.

*evil, demented, sinister, or beautiful. Choose your own adjective.

ALDI - cheap prices or just plain cheap?

2013-10-04T12:21:00.001+01:00

This week, an ALDI store opened up just the road from us. We live just outside a very pretty, historical market town, where supermarkets are a relatively new concept. The town has been resisting planning applications from McDonalds for years. The town is lovely, but known for its snobbish air.

The ALDI has been under construction for weeks. As much as I'd like to say it's a bad fit for our self-confessed highbrow town, I know more people who have been excitedly waiting the opening than are of the new Debenhams. It opened this week to queues around the block.

Yesterday, I dared to venture out. It was ace. Loads of free parking, spanking new trollies (including twin ones), and a peaceful atmosphere.

I did one of our usual twice weekly shops and, overall, the total was quite a bit lower than it would have been at our usual Morrisons. I am thus far impressed.

I wasn't sure about the practice of scanning the items at top speed and having to pack them on my own at the packing bench, especially with two fractious toddlers grabbing everything, but we managed. It was ok. I'll get used to it, as well as remembering to bring more bags, as ALDI don't give you them for free.

Anyway, my biggest concern was around food quality. I don't want to be saving money if the food we will be eating is going to be minging. So, we set ourselves a bit of a taste challenge.

First up, we had fromage frais. ALDI sell their own brand 6 pack for 69p. The equivalent at Tesco or Morrisons is usually £1, unless they are on special offer. The twins liked these. I don't know if they were much different from our usual brand but the twins ate them and asked for more. So, they've passed!

Next up, we got some own brand soft cheese. 200g for 53p. Tesco's own brand equivalent is 49p, but we compared it to our usual Philadelphia brand (usually £1.85). Well, I didn't try it as I hate the stuff but The Dad did, as did our nanny who is a soft cheese connoisseur. They liked it and said it was very little different to Philadelphia. It's a pass!

Golden Puffs - ALDI's own brand is 99p for 375g. They have gone down a treat this morning at breakfast. Sugar Puffs are £2.29 for 320g at Tesco. That's twice the price for less volume. This one's a no-brainer.

Apple juice 1 litre is 72p per carton at ALDI. I tasted this myself and liked it. It was just the same as our usual Morrisons apple juice. Tesco sell their own brand at £1. A nice saving, especially as we drink about three litres a week.

Titan chocolate bars - now I'm a chocolate fan, though I'm just as happy with cheap chocolate in volume as I am with nice chocolates, if you see what I mean. Titan are the same as Mars Bars in that they are nougat, caramel, and chocolate. They are in packs of 6 (38g each) for 69p. Tesco's own brand 'Crazy Caramel' are £1.14 for 8. ALDI = 11.5p per bar, Tesco = 14.25p per bar. I liked em. They are not Mars Bars but I enjoyed them anyway and would eat them again. Naturally!

The big test for us was ALDI's cola brand. Our buying point for either Coca-cola or Pepsi is 25p per can. Once the price gets somewhere near this, we buy in bulk. ALDI's coke works out at 21.5p per can. As cola snobs, this was the one product I was keen to compare. Actually, it was pretty good. Pure brand experts would be able to tell it wasn't proper Pepsi or Coca-Cola, but it's the nearest thing I've found to it in an own brand. Given the choice between ALDI full-fat and branded Diet Coke, I'd take the ALDI any day of the week. It was a pass. Great product for the money. Not sure it's enough of a saving to draw me away from the real thing, but great as a back-up when the special offers are not forthcoming.

So, there we have it. We got lots of other stuff too. Their fruit and veg was a bit cheaper than Morrisons and is good quality, but I can't tell you if it lasts longer yet. Been ok so far. Trying the meat out later, and am hoping it's good because the prices are much lower than Tesco or Morrisons.

I think ALDI could become a regular part of our lives. Depending on what we think of the meat, we may well start using it a bit more rather than our usual shopping centre butchers.

And apologies for the rare post about domestic trivia. Normal service will be resumed shortly.

Review: Minnie's Polka Dot Jet

2013-09-25T22:38:00.000+01:00

Another item we've been trying out this week is Minnie's Polka Dot Jet.

This is already a firm favourite with the twins. It is basically an airplane with seats and two figures - a Minnie Mouse and a Daisy Duck. They love it.

The seats can come in and out. There's a wheely bag each for Daisy and Minnie.

The steps fold down out of the wing so Daisy and Minnie can get in and out.

There is a platform up top so they can sit in the special chair and have their hairs done!

It has wheels so it can whizz along the ground, or it can be lifted up and flown around the playroom - such fun!

It is pretty sturdy and easy to handle for little hands. The twins have had a lot of fun with it, each taking turns to be Daisy or Minnie, and flying it around. Recommended from two years upwards. Probably about right, I reckon. My two-year olds love it.

It retails at around £35 and is available through Smyths and Amazon.

This is good value and well recommended (especially as I have just noticed it's actually on Amazon for £23!).

Disclosure - We were sent the toy free for the purposes of this review. This post contains an affiliate link.

Review: Cheerin' Minnie from Fisher-Price

2013-09-25T14:48:00.001+01:00

This week, we have been playing with a couple of new things.

The first is this.....Cheerin' Minnie. She is a Minnie Mouse electronic toy that does cheerleading.

It is in a similar vein to the Master Moves Mickey I reviewed some time ago, but not as complex. She is very pink, and completely Minnie. She has a few different cheers, and her moves are very simple - her arms wave about and her legs wiggle. She's a lot less interesting than Master Moves Mickey but has a LOT less to go wrong and isn't a huge battery drainer.

Her cheers include a little homage to Mickey with the song 'Hey Mickey'. You can see this in the video.

Apart from cheering and wiggling, she doesn't do a great deal. She's pretty sturdy and has withstood a bit of punishment from the twins. Yesterday, she stopped working because the twins were a bit rough with her and I feared they had killed her, but she started up again when we tried her a bit later. Phew!

She's easy to use. The two-year old twins worked out you had to press the little button on her shoe before I did.

We really like her and have played with her a fair bit this week. I feel £50 is probably too high a price though, but for Minnie fans, she'll be worth it!

You can buy her from Smyths or Amazon.

Disclosure - We were sent a Minnie toy free for the purposes of this review. This post contains an affiliate link.

Review: Walkers Mighty Lights

2013-08-25T22:04:00.000+01:00

This week we were sent some Walkers Mighty Lights to review. Ace. We love crisps. We eat a lot of crisps, and have tried many, many different kinds.

Walkers Mighty Lights are available in three flavours – lightly salted, cheese & onion, and roast chicken.

This is what Walkers have to say about them....

"With 30% less fat than standard crisps, Mighty Lights are perfect for kids' lunchboxes. They are tasty, ridged crisps that come in three flavours - roast chicken, cheese and onion and lightly salted. All the flavours are suitable for vegetarians, and are available in shops nationwide. They're made from real potatoes with no artificial colours of preservatives- and they're a source of fibre."

So what did we think…..?

I really liked them. My favourite flavour is the lightly salted and they really are! Not too salty, and very tasty. I like the ridge texture and the thickness which is a little bit more than regular Walkers. They are crunchy and very moreish.

The children liked all of them to be honest. They asked to try some as soon as our packets arrived, and really enjoyed them. They asked for the ‘new crisps’ when we were putting together a picnic for the park. They weren’t even bothered which flavour they had. For once they didn’t argue and just ate whichever flavour they got. Highly unusual.

The Dad likes them too. Don’t underestimate how much of a recommendation this is. He’s hard to please in the crisp department. He had a bag and I did my serious research bit by asking him if he liked them. He said “yes, they were nice”. The girls and I looked at him suspiciously as if he’d been swapped in the middle of the night for his more generous and affable doppelganger, but no, it was still him. I asked him if he was sure. He said he was. Huzzah! If only he was this easy to please with my housework efforts (or lack of). His favourite flavour is roast chicken, which do actually taste like roast chicken, which can only be a good thing, surely?

We eat a lot of crisps in our house. They are our snack of choice by a mile. Crisps are one of those things that never run out because we keep an eye on the supply box to make sure we never start to run low. That and milk. And maybe wine. Just to be sociable though, you understand.

We have tried low-fat versions of crisps before and never really liked them enough to buy them (The Dad especially is a fussy personage). We like these. The fact that they have 30% less fat than regular crisps is a welcome step in the right direction for us. We’re never going to give up crisps so if we can eat some which have that little bit less fat in them, then this is good news. With a bit of luck Officer Lunchbox at the school will approve too!

To find out more about Walkers Might Lights, you can visit their website at www.walkersmightylights.co.uk

Disclosure – we were sent the crisps to try and paid to write this review. All opinion is our own.

My Ultimate Summer Driving Playlist

2013-08-19T16:22:00.000+01:00

I have been tagged by the superlicious Mum of Three World to tell you my Ultimate Summer Driving Playlist.

Driving. We do a lot of it. We get out and about as much as possible.

What do we listen to in the car? Well at the moment we have a free CD we got from the Early Learning Centre which is an hour of little tunes on an animal theme. Songs like Five Little Speckled Frogs and things like that. Ace.

Not really. Yes, we listen to a lot of kids stuff like the Disney Princess album, and mindless pap like Kelly Clarkson (The Dad is a huge fan), but when I get to choose the music, we listen to things a little less child-friendly.

So what would my choices be?

First up, it's The Levellers. I'm not allowed to choose One Way because that would be copying off Mum of Three World and I am my own person dammit! So I'll skip a few forward and go for The Riverflow instead.

"I met you in 82, over a crate of beer and not a few

I cracked a can and so did you, we're going to change the world (huzzah!)"

Then another folksy choice (sorry, most of my music taste lies in hippy punk or northern folk) is The Proclaimers. It's a toss-up between Letter From America and I'm Gonna Be (500 miles), erm.......ummmm.......or maybe I'm On My Way.

Ok, it's Letter From America

"When you go will you send back

A letter from America?

Take a look up the railtrack

From Miami to Canada"

And if you're not completely convinced that my musical taste lies firmly back in the 20th century, I give you James and Come Home.

"And I can't believe you're all I'll ever need

And I need to feel that you're not holding me

And the way I feel just makes me want to scream

Come home, come home, come home"

And now I'm tagging these lovely people....

Mummy Barrow
Keynko
Red Rose Mummy

Come on, tell me your driving songs!

Review: Fisher Price Little People Fun Sounds Farm and Little People Happy Sounds Home

2013-07-12T12:31:00.000+01:00

Fisher-Price have sent us some new things to play with and we are really excited. They are.....

Fisher-Price Little People Fun Sounds Farm
Fisher-Price Little People Happy Sounds Home

The Fisher-Price Little People….Big Discoveries campaign celebrates those special things that little ones discover and experience every day that spark little stories and big imaginations!

From visiting a farm for the first time, to drawing their first picture, there are endless opportunities for little ones explore, discover, and play! Finding magic in those precious moments as they learn new things is amazing for mums and dads to watch and experience with their little ones.

First of all, we tried out the Happy Sounds Home. There is a little bit of assembly required by the parent (I needed a small screwdriver and a bit of elbow grease). It needs batteries which are included and inserted ready to rock and roll.

The Happy Sounds Home is a two-storey play house with a Mum, a Dad, and a baby included. The Happy Sounds are hidden in items around the home - such as the bottom step, and the telephone - a little song plays for each activity depending on the time of day the house is set to. The dial inside the house can be turned to either daytime or night.

The recently potty-trained twins think that putting the baby on the toilet and listening to the toilet song is the most hilarious thing in the world ever. So they do that a lot. They also like putting the car in and out of the car port.

The Fun Sounds Farm is a barn with animals and a farmer.

There is a dial on this one to set it to daytime or night. The sounds are hidden in the little barn doors and various points in the barn. You can put the animals in the chute and tip them up. They love it, they do.

As per the usual Fisher-Price quality, the animals are super-cute. The items are also very sturdy and perfect for little hands (and tussles) as demonstrated admirably by the twins.

Listen carefully for the sounds in the video clips. As you'll hear, the tunes are not at all over-bearing, which is fine with me! The songs are nice - there is one that says 'night-night' to the cow. They are getting a bit catchy.

The sets have interested my older children too. I caught my nine-year old playing with the Happy Sounds Home yesterday. Alas, no video!

Overall, we love our new toys. They are bright, sturdy, super-cute, and will provide hours of play time for my two-year olds.

For more information on Fisher Price products please visit their website at http://www.fisher-price.com

To see what other family bloggers thought about the Fisher Price Little People....Big Discoveries products, please join in the Twitter party on Friday 2^ndAugust between 11am-12noon. #FPLittlePeople

Disclosure - I am a member of the Netmums Blogging Network, a unique community of parent bloggers from around the UK who have been handpicked by the Netmums team to review products and brands on their behalf. I have been paid expenses and supplied with a product sample for this review but retain all editorial control. All my Netmums Reviews will display the Netmums logo within the post

This is a Netmum's sponsored review.To find out more click the button:

Review: Shamballa Fire Jewellery set

2013-06-30T20:54:00.002+01:00

We have been sent a Shamballa Fire Jewellery set to review. We have used several jewellery kits in the past (Trouble two is a massive DIY and jewellery fan), but this one is aimed at older girls (aged 8 years +).

The set contains enough parts to create five pieces of jewellery, which from the instructions is a shamballa bracelet, shamballa earrings, a bling bracelet,a sparkly pearl bracelet, and a shamballa necklace.

The first thing that struck us about the set was how disappointly small it is. The set comprises a jewellery box, and all the bits you need, but it is not a lot considering the size of the outer packaging. To me, it just seems a bit of a waste of cardboard.

Anyway, we got to work, and first of all we made this. I say 'we'. I set Trouble One off with them, and she was able to work out from the instructions what parts were needed in what order, but she needed a bit of help manipulating the wire. This is what we produced........which is actually a proper pair of earrings. Not toy ones, but ones you can actually use in pierced ears. They will go away until we give Trouble One (who turned nine this week) permission to get her ears done. Gutted! Mwahahahaha.

Spurred on by her little acheivement, we started the necklace. There were some problems with the bits that were supplied, like we couldn't get the cord through the hole in the clasp. We used the alternative ones in the pack instead, which worked, but means we now don't have them for one of the bracelets.

Anyway, we made this and it looks pretty good. Trouble One did most of it on her own, though she needed help with making the knots as they needed to be close to the beads, and she's only just learnt to tie her shoelaces properly.

But she liked it enough to try it on straight away.

We have yet to make the other pieces. We shall save them for a rainy day.

Overall, Trouble One wasn't as keen on jewellery making than Trouble Two is. In fact, T2 (who is 5) has got her beady eyes on the remaining pieces. I don't think T1's lack of enthusiasm for jewellery making was improved by the set though. Some of it was too fiddly for her - I struggled with some of it.

It's definitely for older girls but makes some very pretty pieces. The kit has some very nice beads which are a bit more grown up.

Disclosure - we were sent the set for free to be able to do this review. The link below is affiliate

How to create the perfect cup of coffee

2013-06-19T11:11:00.000+01:00

There are very few things in life quite as wonderful as a good cup of coffee. Smooth, aromatic and stimulating, a great brew can get your morning off on the right foot and help you to cope with anything that the day has in store.

Conversely, there are few things worse than a coffee that is bitter, stale and lukewarm. So here are some tips that you can follow if you want to ensure that your morning cup is fantastic every day.

Buy the best quality beans that you can

As with most things, the finished results will be a lot better if the ingredients are of the best quality.

When it comes to coffee, there’s a huge range of products out there varying enormously in taste, aroma and price. So if you haven’t discovered your perfect mix yet, it’s time to do some experimenting to find the coffee that’s right for you.

If you’ve got a Tassimo coffee machine, they’ll have done a lot of the hard work for you and selected good quality beans to put in their handy discs.

Use good, clean water

The quality of the water that you use can make a huge difference to the taste of the finished beverage, so try to use clean, filtered water if you can.

Avoid reusing any water that was left over from your last brew and if you live in an area with especially hard water, you could consider using bottled water for a great result.

Keep it clean

Whether you use a coffee machine, a cafetiere or an espresso maker, it’s really important to make sure that you clean it thoroughly after every use.

Residue can easily build up if you’re not careful, resulting in a stale taste that detracts from your coffee experience.

Remember to give all of your equipment a good rinse once you’re done so that no traces of soap or washing up liquid find their way into your morning cup.

Heat your milk

This may seem like a lot of extra effort first thing in the morning, but heating your milk makes a huge difference to the final taste of your coffee.

Be careful not to overheat the milk – it starts to burn at around 70˚C – as this will change the flavour completely.

Making the perfect cup of coffee is a lot easier than it seems, just start with good ingredients, have a little patience and practice every day and you’ll be producing world class brews before you know it.

Disclosure - This is a sponsored post for which the content has been provided.

Review: Frankie & Benny's specials menu

2013-06-12T21:24:00.005+01:00

We were invited to try out the new specials menu at Frankie & Benny's, so it would have been rude not to, right?

The specials menu is available every day except Saturdays. As Saturday is generally the only day we can get a baby-sitter, we decided to visit during the week instead, and went today at lunchtime. We decided to grace Hull Kingswood with our rowdy custom.

It was a nice change actually, going when it is quieter. With Trouble One and Trouble Two at school, it was just me, The Dad, and the twins. And a few other worried-looking diners who thought they'd gone out for a civilised, peaceful lunch.

Inspecting the activity book

We got on with ordering before the curious two-year-olds had chance to escape. We decided to try out all three courses of the specials menu (Two courses are £10.95, and you can add the third course for +£2.25). Well, you know, research and everything. Never accuse me of not doing a thorough job!

I started with the BBQ Pulled Pork Potato Skins. Gorgeous. Very porky and potatoey.

The Dad had Cajun Blue Cheese Mushroom Crostini with garlic bread. Well, he had the Crostini. The Twins stole most of the bread.

The twins main meals came out very soon after our starters as suggested by the waitress, so they left our food alone. A bit. They had the children's Chicken Pasta in cheesy sauce and juice for £3.95.

Then for mains, The Dad had the 6oz Ranch Burger with fries......

....and I had the Chicken and Bacon Ranch Salad.

For dessert (natch), I had the Mint Choc Waffle which is a light cinnamon waffle with mint ice-cream, and chocolate honeycomb pieces covered in chocolate sauce. I shared this. Not that I would have had a lot of choice in the matter. But, you know, I'm a generous soul.

The Dad had Banoffee Brownie

The food was the good quality that it always is. It was brought out quickly, and our waitress was very efficient. We would definitely go for lunch again. Even the twins were (mostly) well behaved. It must have been the cheesy pasta and ice-cream. They don't behave that well for MY cooking.

You can view the specials menu here.

Disclosure - We were sent £30 towards our meal, which came to £42 in total including the drinks and the children's meals.