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White River BSD/ Norfork River

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Thu, 22 Mar 2012 15:53:00 +0000

The White has been fishing very consistently as of late with a few curve balls thrown in. Flows have varied from 2,000 cfs to 7,000 cfs during the day. Fish are eating nymph rigs extremely well all over the river. The hatch has come off, but only certain stretches this early will have fish up on that easy pickin' rising rhythm.

Norfork is doing really well. Not as much algae to deal with, so it fishes better ont the varied flow rates. Fish seem to eat a little bit better on the higher flows, but should get back into the game on the lower flows this week. Caddis are showing up there as well. This week should fish great with some lower flows on top. Not as many recircs and foam lines on higher flows as the White, so only a select few spots will push dries this coming week on the higher flow times.

tight lines,

Forrest Smith

Trout and Timber Outfitters

www.troutandtimber.com

THE INTERNET AS IT PERTAINS TO HUNTING, FISHING, AND EGO'S. THE BIRTH AND DEATH OF THE OUTDOORS

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Thu, 12 May 2011 02:04:00 +0000

In my opinion, one of the greatest and worst invention in fishing and hunting is the "interweb". Every guide, fishing/hunting organization has a web page, forum, or blog. Info travels fast. Fishing reports, stream data, gear reviews, and peoples opinions on how they correlate to your fishing experience can readily be accessed by smart phones streamside now. However, "every action, has an equal and opposite reaction."

It all started when Al Gore invented the internet (...........). "Information" became cheap. This said "information" quickly replaced hard earned diplomas from "University of Duck" and "Trout Tech". Information is no longer passed from father to son, but from DRTROUT579 to RIPPNLIPS_PLAYA.

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY

THE GOOD

The internet can be an awesome tool. Stream flows can be found on USGS.GOV, and the fishing and hunting reports are more numerous than the fish that swim in the river. Its nice to be able to look up fly recipes, and duck decoy jerk cord riggings. Google earth really changed the game (especially hunting) when gallons of "scouting trip gas" can be conserved by just scrolling over and zooming in on the desired terrain an outdoorsman might think about chasing his/her quarry. Trust me, I've used and continue to use the tools mentioned above. Checking flow charts have saved my rear on many a day trying to stay ahead of a mud bubble blowing down a swelling river, and google earth has found me many a new honey hole to work out the retrieving skills of my lab.

The internet has also spawned many a social network and there are more people participating than not. Even my grandma has a profile on facebook. Social networks are great for finding new fishing/hunting buddies, and share your newest fish porn. Fishing/hunting forums can double in this fashion as well.

As a guide, I use the internet as a marketing tool. I (not that successfully) reach the masses with my stellar fishing reports, fish tales, pictures, and just let the world know "how big of a deal" my outfitting company is.

What's the internet without the fishing reports?!?! I check them every time I go fishing out of state, or try to find my next new destination. As a fishing guide with a very secretive and competitive nature, I like to check the local stuff to see if the "other guys" have figured out my sneaky little plays on the river or use it as a pressure check to see where everybody IS fishing to avoid it when my playbook says I need to find fresh water and unmolested fish for my game plan to work.

The Bad

Information flies as fast on the internet as a Used Car Salesman's mouth trying to sell you a "mint condition" 1990 Jeep with 300.000 miles and "beauty marks". As an outdoorsman, sometimes its hard to wade through 95% of the BS to find 5% of the gems. I have clientel repeatedly calling me saying they heard this or that and the fishing was horrible. I simply ask them the source. 99% of the time they got the info from RAINBOW_WARRIOR1967 on whiteriverguru.com. Turns out this mythological warrior who did not fight any rainbow trout that weekend was from out of state and very new to the sport. chances are he was probably online fantasizing about fishing he's never been able to catch, but he won't let you know that he's sitting on the couch watching Oprah and eating cheeto's instead. His 5,000 posts would never elude you to that fact. Sometimes searching for a credible fishing or hunting report is like following Jennifer Aniston's love life via The Enquirer. You never know what to believe....and you'll never see Rainbow Warrior's experience level

As I have said previously, that I have used tools like Google Earth, they have also come back to bite me in the rear. Many a hunter have inherited mental GPS coordinates to some hunting honeyhole passed on from their Dad who inherited it from his Dad. No one knew about that tiny cut that opened up into a big timber hole with the prettiest, and lowest lying timber in the county. Greenheads would instintively flock to the hole like the swallows of Capistrano year after year. Well that changed when some pimple faced 17 year old used Google Earth and saw from space that the little bitty cut opened up into something magical. Consequently that Pimple faced hunter....lets call him DUCKSLAYER666 beat you to your magical place in the morning, brought all his pimple faced computer literate buddies, and hunted every day of the week scaring every duck off the hole until the next big push of northern birds come down. It gets worse when his buddy SHOOTDUX12 from duckslayers.com decides that he's to lazy to go burn time and find some birds and does some "internet scouting." DUCKSLAYER666 wants to let everyone know how great of a hunter he is so he shows his glory shots and pretty much gives out the gps coordinates to your hole. Now you're not just racing the pimple faced death squad to the duck hole in the morning, but half the state.

As a fishing guide, marketing applications are also a double edged sword. Websites need constant updates. Mastering google rankings to reach the masses is a constant battle. I spend my "days off" not just tying flies, and writing corresponding booking emails to clientel. Instead, I'm writing this article, trying to keep my website updated and relevant. I could be scratching the dog, watching Everybody Loves Raymond reruns, or earning brownie points with the little lady by cleaning something....shoot maybe even fishing or hunting. But I can't....I've got tweeting, facebooking, and blogging on the menu for the next couple hours.

The facebooking part is a monster of its own. Its pretty simple. Just create your profile, throw a bunch of grip and grins in the galleries, and update your status atleast every couple days with something like "fishing is off the hizooook!"....I dunno thats how everyone writes on Facebook. The part that gets me is when someone I have no idea who they are in real life (happens multiple times a week) asks me to take them on some pro bono fishing trip. Apparently I should be so lucky to fish with them. In reality, I rarely get time to go out and fun fish (see paragraph above pertaining to taming the google monster), let alone with my real life friends (real life means you interact with them outside of the virtual internet sphere). I really only get to fish with my Dad, they guy that changed my diapers and taught me to catch fish and live life, probably only one or two days a year. So don't take it personal virtual buddies, when I use the line"until Unicef gets in the biz, I'm the guy to call, and WILL have to charge you for my time." Guiding is my job, not my hobby. I like writing, but lets be honest. I'm not doing this blog for the theraputic qualities. I'm hoping someone thinks "This guys is fricken hilarious, I would love to book a trip with him and hear some funny stories."

The Ugly

I've always thought there was no room in fly fishing for ego's. On the river, chances are no one is in earshot to hear you proclaim your superiority...and quite frankly the trout and ducks don't care. The internet, however, has given many the perfect stage to show off everything they know and don't know but claim they are the authority on...in fly fishing or duck hunting. The most common place for these "sexual intelectuals" to dwell in are online forums. The more a person types, the more they must know.

Client- I want to cancel my trip. RAINBOW_WARRIOR1967 said it was terrible

Forrest- Fishing is great. Who the heck is rainbow warrior??

Client- I dunno, but he has 1,299 posts on whiteriverguru.com and every post is as long as a novel.

Forrest- You've fished with me for 4 years. When I say its good....its typically good. Right? Trust me...we're crushing them on dries. Yes its flowing big, but the big boys are munching.

Client- But rainbow warr...

Forrest- has many leather bound books and his house smells of rich mahogany.....shoot i bet he's the best fishermen he knows....trust me its going to be good.

Client- be there tomorrow

post trip......50 million fish later.

Client- can't trust anything on the internet these days.

Forrest- lucky fish don't read fishing forums or they may not have decided to eat today.

I used to contribute to these said forums. Occassionally I will reappear to squash some new fangled theory that threatens to scare every fisherman thinking about booking guides in the area code. When you see that or an errant article on the web, you've got to put up a valid defense quickly to save possible bookings. An outdoorsman's forum can sometimes be like a hallway filled with middle school girls. but I still read them quite frequently. Not for the information, but for the comedy. When attitudes go south in those suckers, they make the Battle at Gettysburg look like a civil backyard get-together. Everyone's always defending or trying to show off their proverbial manhood. Portrayals of sarcastic and witty comments are lost in a forum. Even emoticons (those smiley face things that make different mood emotions) can't portray the joke in the light you could with your real fishing buddies in the boat. Consequently, you've just hurt RAINBOW_WARRIOR1967's feelings and he's going to sick his internet posse on you. Chances are that posse will never find you if you hide on the river.

The good news is trout aren't thin skinned, they don't care how many posts you have, how many virtual likes you have on your facebook, or how many twitter followers you have. All they care about is you putting the fly in the magic shoe box, and not dragging it out.....they way they used to be, and always will be. God forbid they start following me on twitter to figure out my plan of attack. Maybe I should have titled the article " the life and death of the OUTDOORSMAN" and not "OUTDOORS".

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Mon, 02 May 2011 15:24:00 +0000

Suck it up, and FIIISH!

Angler- "I really like fish out west. The rivers have more current. My palsa indicator wtih a midge has only moved 10 feet down river in the last minute."

Angler- "Wow look at that huge brown trout we just spooked in this low water. It sure would be nice to be able to put a fly in front of one without having to wear a guilly suit and make 90 foot casts into a dixie cup."

Most heard Angler quote- "When is the best time to hook a big brown?"

I hear some sort of these statements quite often during low water periods. Anglers like: 1. current, 2. legitmate shots at large fish with more forgiving circumstances, and 3. sharing a river with less anglers per river mile.

The time is now. Just like 2008, we should have larger than average flows all the way until September. Many anglers believe that the only way to catch a trout on the White River is with a palsa strike indicator and a midge, but the higher flows lend towards many different and more interesting ways of skinning a cat in a single fishing day.

DRIES

One of the biggest misconceptions with bigger flows is that it will put down any hatch work that might have happened. FALSE!!!! Large flows will delay hatches as the temps will lower causing the hatch to take off 2-4 weeks later than on a normal year. The spots, and how fish will eat dries also changes. Fish will not rise river wide, yet certain bug funnels will concentrate fish and bugs into certain areas making for the best "head shooting" in the US.

Big bugs opportunities (terrestrials) peak during these conditions as well. When the flows reach up to the grassy and bushy banks where these land based morsels live make them even more succeptible to the fish that key in on them.

When we've got a 1 in 13 year Cicada hatch to condition or fish to look up early this summer, there is no doubt that the foam and rubber leg fury will be less this year (if not more) than on any other great hopper year.

STREAMERS

Big flows= success with big flies. My favorite time to throw streamers is in the 16,oo0- 24,000 cfs range. During the summer, light values will still play an important role. But it is a lot easier for the stars to align when big flows happen EVERY DAY. Instead of once every few weeks. Spring will be more prime than summer as we should have more over cast days than in July.

NYMPHING

Nymphing is always prevelant on the tailwater systems. We'll have a huge surge of worms for the first few weeks, but will steady out to scuds, sowbugs, and even midges for droppers. Big flows equal a clean river bottom, great growth rates and huge trout. Bobbern' big browns is easy livin' all summer long for those wanting to catch five million trout....and quite a few hogs.

PEOPLE WHO LIKE TO WADE

There are plenty of places to wade fish all the way up to peak 8 units (+24,000 cfs), you just need a boat to get to them. In fact, I catch more big fish wading at these flows as all the motor boats will push some leviathon fish onto some really skinny flats where they can't go. There's literally no excuse for any angler not to fish during this year on the White system.

Myth: MOTOR BOATS OUT PRODUCE DRIFT BOATS ON HIGH WATER YEARS

HORSE $@!#!!!!!

I've got both types of boats but always prefer fishing from a drift boat. Drift boats are stealthy, more efficient at "crack and crevice" fishing, and easier to handle on foam lines and streamer banks without putting fish "down". Both boats are great during high water, but one is not better than the other. Motor boats are great for repeating bobber runs with 5 million rainbows on them, whereas drift boats are better at covering the "off water" efficiently and effectively.

In a nutshell what I'm trying to say is "The fishing is going to be absolutely epic this summer, just suck it up and pack the 4 weights and size 22's away."

A guide for those who hire fishing guides.

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 19:40:00 +0000

Many anglers I have taken out over the years have never used a fishing/hunting guide before or have not been advised on appropriate etiquette, and banter used on a fishing trip. I have devised a set of rules and real life parables that I have lived to serve as an outline for those who might decide to use the "insightfulness" of a guide in the near future.

Commandment Numero Uno

An Angler shalt not lie about his fishing ability.

Being a very experienced fisherman and more importantly guiding, I don't care how great or green you are to the sport. Be straight up about your abilities. Don't tell your guide that you are very experienced fly fisherman when you've only fished once. We can better serve you and set up game plans to make your day much more enjoyable if you tell us how good you really are. Don't be embarassed! Not everyone is born an olympian, and not everyone can double haul a 9" fly 60 feet into a hula-hoop sized target.

Inserting real to life commentary of a phone conversation before booking a trip.

Fisherman- Hello my name is Joe Angler and I'm from Such and Such, Such and Such. I saw your website with the pictures of al those nice fish and I would like to book a trip with you and wonder how we'll be fishing for them

Guide- Hey Joe, Good to hear from you. We have several different ways we catch these fish depending upon an anglers skill level. Have you fly fished much (please don't bs me).

Fisherman- Well I've been fly fishing for twenty years ( One time I fly fished twenty years ago and haven't gotten around to it since). I'm a relatively great caster (if my memory serves me well from 20 years ago), and I love (the idea) of streamer fishing. It says you specialize in that this time of year.

Guide- Okay good (sounds to good to be true). That's one good way to key in on some bigger fish (I'll be packing a bobber rod just in case). What kind of rods do you have?

I believe it is a 5/6 weight Fenwick which I've done pretty good with in the past (i swung an olive wooly bugger in a riffle twenty years ago and I caught a fish).

Guide- Okay (i knew it). Typically we throw a lot larger flies that need bigger rods. I've got some just in case (we actually streamer fish, because you're probably going to need casting lessons before I can even get you to flop a bobber and some nymphs 1o feet off the side of the boat) you need a little extra back bone to throw my flies.

How the conversation should go if an angler follows commandment numero uno.

Fisherman- Hello my name is Joe Angler, I'm from such and such, such and such. I saw all those pictures of nice fish on your website, and you seem to be a very reputable guide. I would like to book a trip with you, and would like to know how you pursue the nicer fish.

Guide- Hey Joe, good to hear from you. I have been in the business for a while and do happen upon some nice fish pretty frequently with all different types of methods depending upon time of year and an angler's skill level. What experience do you have (please don't BS me).

Fisherman- Well I've been fly fishing once, but that was twenty years ago. I'd like to try my hand at it again. I probably have a lot of brushing up to do on my casting. I saw that you are big into streamer fishing. That seems like a fun way to catch a trout.

Guide- (he didn't bs me! i like this guy already) Yes sir, streamer fishing is a lot of fun. It takes a bit more know how than some other methods to catch fish. But I'd probably like to start you out with some more simple methods of fishing to instill some confidence and get some fish under your belt, and from there we can progress and get fancy with methods and style points (i'll pack a streamer rod just in case you progress nicely for later in the day).

Fisherman- Sounds good (this guide didn't string me along promising me everything under the sun, seems like a straight shooter. I like this guy) Lets book these dates, and hopefully I'll get to pitch that streamer rod around a little bit by the end.

That's how it should go. Anglers shouldn't be embarassed about their skill levels. A guides going to know your skill level once you wrap your hands around the cork anyways.

Commandment Numero Dos

Anglers should think before they speak.......less they become the butt of a joke a guide shall tell on another fishing trip. It's best that I give you some real life examples to learn from.

Fisherman: How deep is it here? (while standing in ankle deep water)

Guide: It comes up to a duck's ass.

Fisherman: Which way is down river? (while standing on the banks of a rapid)

Guide: I sure hope it was the way we've been floating. I thought gravity pulled everything DOWN thus the way the water would be flowing would be down river. I sure hope so. The lodge owner told me to float you guys down river to the lodge. I don't have that much food in the boat for dinner and its probably going to rain tonight.

Fisherman: Look, that cow has spots.........and its running....isn't that weird?

Guide: I don't understand the question. Is it A. a cow has spots? B. The cow is running or C. both A and B a spotted cow is running.

Fisherman: What time will the tide come in? (sitting about 2000 ft. above sea level)

Guide: Oh no, I never thought of that. I hope it doesn't ruin our day.

Fisherman: If all the rivers are high and they're flowing into the ocean, than why isn't the ocean rising (a doctor speaking about rivers during early season during run off in alaska)?

Guide: I guess they didn't cover evaporation and geographical statistics in med school. They did however cover that phenomenon in my seventh grade public school class. Let me explain

Fisherman: Where do salmon come from? (looking upon the masses of red sockeyes spawning in a river)

Guide: from the ocean

Fisherman: I know that! But where do they really come from?

Guide: well.....i thought your mom and dad should have covered this...but when a mommy and daddy salmon love each other very much.........

I could go on and on. I don't mind the questions really. They fill my guide days with a lot of comical banter.

Finally........

Commandment Numero Tres

This one goes for both duck hunters and fly fishers.

While using the restroom in the woods, make sure waders and corresponding straps are tucked forward out of the firing line, nets worn on the back tucked over the front of the shoulder. For the guys......corresponding manly gear should also be tucked away from any clothing articles. Makes for an uncomfortable rest of the day.

White River (below Bull Shoals

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 16:01:00 +0000

Big Bug bite Brown

6/22/10

The last few outings have been very amusing. I'm observing guides with bobbers strapped to beadhead rigs tucking tale and running to the dam...all the while the bugs are massing in the trees waiting for the magical hour to burst onto the scene in the spots down river that the said guides just left. There must be something at the dam I don't know about right now, but with the dry fly fishing as good as it is....ignorance is bliss.

Randy and a brown on a Sulphur....life's tough

Fished the State Park to Wildcat. Flows started at about 12,000 cfs and bumped to 16,000 in the afternoon. Same deal different day. Hatch progression started in the afternoon, so we started out with some nymphing and then moved to the dry game after lunch.

Brown on a Caddis.....they'll be here all summer folks.

I have never seen hatches this thick anywhere I've ever been. That's saying something as i just left the dry fly mecca of Missoula, and spent three winters in Chile. Sulphurs are coming off in the mid afternoons with the caddis coming off really late. The big bug bite is still going and will continue to get better on through the summer.

Several nice browns were landed all on dries. Saw pods of easily 500 fish all up on rhythm. Henry's Fork, eat your heart out. There is no other river in the US right now that has better dry fly fishing than the White....hands down.

Forrest Smith

Trout and Timber Outfitters

first time

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Sat, 29 May 2010 02:31:00 +0000

Growing up in the Ozarks, there aren't too many trickles of water that I don't know better than the back of my hand, just some of have to "refamiliarize". On days off, I'm constantly checking out different ditches I think might have fish at water levels that I haven't fished. Sometimes I strike gold, and sometimes I strike out. If a guide claims he knows everything and still has nothing to learn.....he's flat out lying through his teeth. The day I stop learning is the day I become a complacent guide, and will thus retire from the field.

In past years, I've sometimes guided in up to three different geographical regions in a single season. Some of them have been brand new. Sometimes I've worked, and been handed a map drawn on a napkin with the put in and a takeout (not in Arkansas thank God)....accompanied by a reassuring pat on the back and a "you'll figure it out." Those trips can get western a hurry.

Enter Montana

I had the pleasure of working in Missoula, MT for the 2009 summer season. Images of pods up on rhythm, and big browns crashing salmon flies danced in my head the whole spring before the pilgrimage north. It was every bit as good as I had ever imagined, but again, I was a new guy with a ton of brand new water to learn.

Everything went smooth through the beginning of the season. I started out learning the bunny slopes with a couple guide buddies. Then I started expanding to the sneaky floats, but with hundreds of miles to learn, there were still going to be those days where the professional bull shitter had to clock in and tell the clients about the 30 times I had been down that stretch and the really nice fish I had caught in that tail out outside seam three days ago. Typically it was no big deal. I caught plenty of fish. The saying goes, "Fish are fish, and water is water."

I did have one day when I looked like a true fanewguy(f***ing new guy). I had actually picked up a couple days from a secondary outfitter. I had a couple plans in my head. On that day plan A, B, and C wouldn't pan out. The clients had already fished A and B with another guide that week, and shuttle reports said C was going to have 6 boats on it. I called the outfitter, and he reccomended a stretch of river I had never fished.

No problem. I did remember asking a guide buddy about that stretch and they mentioned a diversion dam named Sleeping Child. No problem normally, but I already had my hard boat trailored and 20 minutes out of town. I talk to the outfitter, and he said, "Yeah no problem you Southern Sally. Just get the clients out, walk them around, walk back up, and shoot the far left side."

So I get to the river, rig up, tell the clients about all the big fish I've caught in the stretch that I've actually never seen before. I was still very confident, but I did notice a funny look from a guide sporting a raft at the boat ramp. I think to myself, "Screw em', I'll show him the new guy's got a couple tricks up his sleeve." It was golden stone time on the Bitterroot. If a guide

can't catch fish at that time, he might as well apply at McDonalds as a fry cook.

Fishing took off better than I had predicted. First good run....three fish. Second good run....7 fish. Multiple doubles. I called (bull shitted) a couple eats from a couple bigger fish in a couple spots. Life was gravy.

We have lunch, and I tell them about the upcoming diversion dam. We keep fishing, whacking fish after fish. I'm the guide of the year at this point. We make a bend and I see another nice and greasy run.....but it disappears on the horizon. Butt cheeks start to clench. Enter Sleeping Child.

I row over, and notice three different boats at the top, all of them rafts. Great. I've got my hard boat, and a low nosed skiff at that. I get the clients out and walk them down all the while inspecting the diversion dam. It looks like no big deal. The outfitter called it just perfect. The clean chute was far left, but it had a big wave train at the bottom. No problem, no recirc waves, just rip on the oars at the bottom and slow it down not to plow the train. I line the boat up and pass the three rafts anchored. They are all on the bank ready to watch the show. I give them all a nod and say "this is pushing it with the skiff huh?" I just get blank looks.

Tough crowd I guess. I keep my boat lined up. I hit the lip, and give it a push. I miss every rock, pivot at the bottom, to hit the wave train. I'm the man.....Montana whimps and their rafts. How'd these dang guys Creme of Wheat Eatin sons a b****** the Civil War again? I hit the bottom and dig on the oars. POW!!! My oar busts. I get a little goofy in the waves, but I manage to some how hit the train straight on. I can't slow down with one oar, and the waves are a couple feet bigger than I had guessed from the bank. Here it comes. I'm taking water on the chin. Going down in flames. Look over, and my clients eyes are as big as saucer plates as they imagine their guide going down in flames. At this point in time, I've got 12 inches of standing water in the boat, one functioning oar with the spare tucked well behind my gear, and thinking to myself "guess those Yanks came to the big show prepared." I stand up and canoe paddle my boat over to the bank about 200 yards below the clients. I pull the boat way up on the slope bank so all five hundred gallons of water will go to the back and start bailing.

Client: "What happened Forrest?"

Forrest: "My oar broke, guess I don't know my own strength" nervously chuckling.

Client: " I was wondering why you canoe paddled the boat to the bank. I noticed all the other guys were rowing rafts. Did you not know the diversion would be this bad?"

Forrest: "Well it changed quite a bit since the last time I floated it"

Client: "I thought you said you floated it three days ago. You were talking about all those nice ones you whacked in here."

Forrest: Yeah, changed quick, speaking of big ones......there's a really nice brown a bend down on the tail out....let's do a fly switch up drakes are coming off, and the fish really go on this cripple in this stretch."

The other guide boats come through, pick up their clients, and make the voyage past me while I'm bailing out my boat. I see the clients pointing, and the guides chuckling.

Client: "I told you, all those guys are running rafts."

Forrest: "That's because these Montana Sally's don't know how to canoe paddle a hard boat."

Wiley Critters

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Thu, 06 May 2010 05:54:00 +0000

For the majority of my guiding career, 95% percent of my trips have been trout trips. There are multiple reasons for this, but mainly due to the fact that most of the places I have guided are exclusively trout fisheries like Montana and Chile. In Alaska I guided all five species of salmon and trout. Arkansas is a different story.

I've grown up in this area. I cut my teeth on t

iny warm water creeks, rivers, and lakes. As I progressed as a fisherman, the challenge of trout drew me to the cold tailwaters of the White River Basin. I've guided them for sometime. I really enjoy it. My clients also enjoy it. Who wouldn't? The White River boasts a bajillion fish a mile, and the chance for that monster kicker fish. But I still found myself fishing the warm water species on my days off.

Sound logic kicked in a few years ago. If I enjoy this I'm sure my clients will be tap dancing at the end of the day as well. Thus the warm water portfolio began to develop.........

The season starts off at the end of March with the white bass run. This is a no brainer. Constant action, the occassional striper. More importantly, its a way to keep my sanity after keying on one species (trout) all winter long. They're not picky.....consequently my rusty bass flies from the prior year get used up. Its like fly fishing's version of spring cleaning. Can'

t be too rusty, because I don't want that rogue 20 lb. striper chomping the thing in half.......

Funny I should have mentioned the striper, because its next on the calendar. This one can be tough. I've got a group of clients that are all gung ho on these things. Tough part is

, the stars have to align to get these critters to come shallower then 20 ft. deep. When the conditions are right. I start making despereate phone calls.

Forrest: "Joe Angler.....its on....get here in three days?"

Joe Angler: "ehh...how good is it? taxes are due this week"

Forrest: "Well, we put a dozen in the boat, and three came on top....biggest being a quarter of a century, but we lost a bigger one"

Joe Angler: "Filing an extension, game on."

Unless an angler's very flexible, it is extremely hard to hit as they can come into the shallows in a days time, and leave just as quickly. And everyonce in a blue moon, Joe Angle

r comes, and the fish have gone back down to 15 feet........out comes the lead. It's always a roll of the dice. But just like Vegas, when you hit it, you hit it big.

By the time the stripers dwindle, Ozark's native son (Smallmouth Bass) has finally come out to play. This is my favorite time of year. Early can be tough. Finesse is the game,

but the big ones are dumb, and very eager to eat anything that looks edible coming out of their winter slumber. But its topwater takes that really draws me to the species. Fly Fishermen, travel the world over to see a turd brown slurp a salmon fly. I believe thats due to the fact that the majority of this "mass" hasn't seen a smallmouth come screaming halfway across a river to smash a popper. That's okay with me. There's no shuttle traffic reports, and I can take my time at the boat ramp.

In the previous post, I mentioned that I felt like a "6 month old Jack Russell chasing its tail in circles at mach 12." There's a lot to stay on top of. Its worth it. The trout game is great. Its what pays the bills. But if an angler wants to see what the Ozarks are all about,

then they need to put away the 5 weight and their midge box, and start beating some brush. To chase a lot of these species is like putting one's self in a time warp. Finding that water that hasn't been altered by dams and trout docks. Its not really the bent rod itself, but the journey to find the bend.

firing on all cylinders!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Tue, 20 Apr 2010 00:14:00 +0000

Things get hectic in a fishing season, especially Arkansas in the spring. Right now I'm chasing water temps on the smallie rivers, white bass runs, pinning hatches down, and chasing down virgin streamer runs.

Other times of the year, one or two of these things may happen at any given time, allowing a fishing guide to concentrate on a given product and give it a nudge. Right now, I'm a 6 month old jack russell terrier chasing my tail at mach 12.

How do I decide what to do? Its pretty simple really. I just ask "Joe Fisherman" what he wants to do.

JA "Forrest, I've never really hit the mother's day hatch before."

Forrest "No problem Joe Angler, the hatch is popping on about 18 miles of river"

JA "Forrest, how's the smallie fishing? Is there a particular river you would reccomend"

Forrest "there is no particular river right now, pick one out of a hat, it'll fish great, if you want bigger ones, lets concentrate on some green water."

JA "So i hear you like to pitch the secret chicken, are they on?"

Forrest "Is the Pope Catholic? Crawdads are popping, and the sculpins are in the mood right now so its easy pickin."

JA "How's the nymph fishing?"

Forrest "Why? I guess we could catch 80 fish on that today, but what's the point, let me explain what's going on right now...."

In short, we are in the middle of a "happening." The stars have aligned. At the same time, I'm running all over Northern Arkansas putting boats up dirty, switching for the other dirty boat the next day, scrounging through fly boxes that look like a mortar round went off inside. I've got time to do the three S's in the morning (scratch that, two) and thats about it. A good nights sleep is a faint memory. I've got a day off tomorrow so everything's okay. Wait, I just heard a gobble out back and there's a few days of turkey season left. Guess I can sleep when I'm dead.......or June.....I hope.

so you want to be a fishing guide?

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 01:08:00 +0000

I've found myself to be socially handicapped. If you ask my good friends, or even the sports I take out in my boat they would scream blasphemy. I never run out of stories or jokes in these circumstances. But when i take the lovely lady to the local watering hole or meet new people, its tough to get a word in. It's also not that I'm timid with new people. I always get stuck on one simple introductory question, "So what do you do (for a living)?"

I'm a fishing guide, a fly fishing guide at that. I'm not embarrassed. I absolutely love my job. The office views are great, and the gossip doesn't revolve around a broken copy machine but where the next caddis push is going to explode. The only screaming a guide will ever hear is from a Hardy fly reel, not an unrelenting superior. But its still a job.

When I lived in Missoula, MT the profession was very common. The morning commute was predominantly pick up trucks and drift boats. If a person wasn't a fishing guide, they were related or at least knew one. They knew the gig, its splendors and its spoils. Arkansas is a different case.

In my hometown of Fayetteville, guides are harder to find then putting a bead down on a late night snipe hunt. In Mountain Home, guides are prevalent, but more of the weekend warrior variety. If you throw the word "fly fishing" in the mix there's no telling what the civilian you are conversing with will say. I've had the follow up questions vary from "so how do you catch your flies" to "what does a fishing airplane look like".

Now this doesn't bother me so much. It's the follow ups like:

"So what's your real job?"

"People pay you to fish with them? That's awesome! I think I want to be a fishing guide."

So you want to be a fishing guide huh?

Here's the gig:

Hours:

Up at 4:00 am, prepping boats, checking flows, and putting together a couple game plans (always a plan B and C)

Pick the clients up at 7:30, and on the river by 8:00-8:30

Fish till 5:00 pm (seems like a normal blue collar gig so far)

Trailer the boat, drop the clients off at 6:00 pm

Wash the boat, fill the truck up and arrive at home 7:00 pm

Give the lovely lady a peck on the cheek, tell her you still remember what she looks like, shovel down the food the said saint has made for you 7:30

make the phone calls to all your clients for the next day about pick up times, food likes and dislikes, and of course "how's the fishing been?" always comes up. so if a guide has got a couple boats out the next day.....expect 8:30 (still not done)

Crank out a couple dozen flies. In Montana this isn't a big problem. Most fly companies gear a majority of their bug patterns to western hatches and rivers. But that is not the case in Arkansas. If you want to catch fish, you tie your own flies. we also fish a lot of 5 and 6x so at least a dozen or two to replace the break offs. 10:00 pm

Finally done!!! 18 hours later.....

Now its private time....talk to the Misses, make sure she still doesn't want to divorce you. Ask about her day, the bit every average Joe does.

This is the average day in the life of a fishing guide. This does not include the days that you stall out on your float to wait for a late hatch, or an evening streamer bite. If that happens add a couple hours to the day.

Still want to be a fishing guide? Its long hours but the job is still a cake walk right?

......wrong.

I love my job, but its no cake walk. I don't push papers, but I get hit with errant casts. I don't have to meet deadlines, but sometimes the fish are being stubborn. I don't have to work on excel, but I do untangle things more complex than an algorithm from a NASA Scientist.

Still want to be a fishing guide?

A guide not only catches fish, but is a jack of all trades. In any given day, a person in the trade can: pack a faulty trailer bearing, get a blind man to set the hook on a pod sipping #24 midges, repair Jack and Jill's marriage (when fishing with a dis functional couple), hold a piss bucket while an 82 year old fisherman relieves himself, act somewhat interested in a man's stamp collection for 9 hours, and somehow manage to catch a few fish.

That's my job, its tough, its gritty, and I love the ever living snot out of it. I love the comradery with the clients, I love the challenge of the new fisherman. Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment. There is one thing I don't enjoy, and that's having to explain what it is that I actually "do".

Speaking the lingo

noreply@blogger.com (Trout and Timber Outfitters) — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 17:56:00 +0000

Fly fishermen in general are definitely a different breed, and fishing guides, who rarely make it out from behind the sticks, have evolved into something that separates them from the civilian population within the same ecosystem. Depending on the person asked they could be placed on either side of the human spectrum, super or sub human.

I have always thought that guides, especially fly guides fell right in the middle with the ordinary Joe, yet the misconception lies within the different vocabulary and dialects we use. I can see as to how many might think of us as being an evolved and intelligent humanoid when

"ovapositing trichoptera" rolls off the tongue. And yet the indecipherable grunts and groans of a bloan cast or a large streamer to the back of the head lead many people to believe that a chimpanzee's communication skills are closer to that of a Rhodes scholar in the evolutionary chain.

For those civilians that frequent the same rivers and streams as a guide or those of you who might decide to follow my frequent ramblings, I have created a translation to help cross the linguistic barrier.

Dirt Snake- a san juan worm

Wet Chicken- any streamer over 6"

Baby Chicken- any streamer under 6"

Turd- a girdle bug/ Pat's stone

Poaching Water- a blatant low hole (someone pulls in and fishes down stream) or any whoring of your water by another angler.

Double Bagging- wearing two rain coats due to a down pour

Devil's Rig- a dirt snake with a dirt snake dropper

Shooting heads- contrary to belief this is not a game violation. it is casting to a rising fish.

San Francisco Trout- a rainbow trout hooked in the anus.

toofah: two trout landed on one rig with a dropper, pronounced twoferrr' in Arkansas

White River two step: also known as the san juan shuffle. kicking one's feet on the bottom to create a feeding frenzy. this is a no no

Walter Jr. a brown trout under 24"

fish !+@*: a picture of nice fish...usually in the grip n grin pose

grip n grin: grip a trout and grin for the camera

old man river: blue hair fishing guide....someone that was a fishing guide/ fisherman before dirt was invented.

attitude adjustment: a can of Copenhagen

crossing some one's eyes: hitting them in the back of the head with a large split shot or heavy fly due to an errant cast

biorhythm: also associated with "holding your mouth right" has to do with being able to catch fish or not catch fish on many days. hangovers are also directly correlated to biorhythms.

angel dust: a special something that you put into a dubbing blend to push your pattern over the edge. give it that fishy twinkle. also known as pixie dust.

steak and eggs: flesh fly and egg pattern fished simultaneously

oar wh*re: a fishing guide that rows a drift boat. there are also many other titles for this wily character that are not suitable for this site. Very rare in Arkansas, but are being seen more and more.

billy bob back troll: people seen back trolling on the White River while smoking a cigarette and drinking a beer simultaneously. The consumption of alcohol and operation of a boat is illegal and not condoned by the author of this translator.

Duel carburetor- a hardy fly reel

Blue striped tiger with a wench- a war eagle fly rod with a flueger automatic reel

Whistling Gopher- usually frequents fishing shows. they ask "how much does one of them fishing trips go fer'?" when hit with the amount they begin to whistle.

fly shop talk 20- a 16 inch fish.

Seventh ring of hell- a y2k with a san juan dropper

s#xual intellectual: an f%^&%$ know it all

trout park brigade: people that feel that you are standing over the only fish in the river. so they fish on your hip pocket while there is 2 miles of open water to be had. This mentality is usually brought about from being reared in a "trout park" north of the Arkansas border. the standard line "if i knew you were going to fish this close to me I would have brought another sandwich" is appropriate during these encounters. the problem is easily diffused when you give the fellow angler a couple hot flies, a bead on another good spot. other aliases for this character include "roaring river renegades" or the "Missouri Mafia". in the duck hunting world this would be known as the "South Carolina Swat Team". Side note- this term does not include most and is not limited to people indigenous to the states of South Carolina and Missouri. All fisherman from any region that act in this way are deemed a member of the TPB. The author has always enjoyed the company and been appalled by the actions of persons of all regions of the US and multiple continents. May not be deemed politically correct by many, but "I ain't your politician, I'm your fishing guide."

Sagesocrat- a person with a deep wallet, and limited fishing talent. the method behind the madness is they think "fishyness" can be purchased through a goofy hat, an expensive rod, and a $500 pair of waders.

I think that will cover the basic needs. I won't go in to deep on the scientific names of the bugs or other technicalities. I'd rather watch paint dry. Now onto the inaudible grunts and groans.

hawlysheetahh- an angler is dropping his cast and hitting everyone in the boat

susususususset- your fly just got eaten. set the hook

giviteer- usually happens on a slow day. the fishing guide is mentally beat and wants to change your flies. usually followed by a more audible. "if it doesn't work, it doesn't ride for free".

hoooolyfufufufufdidjayaseet- The biggest fish in the area code just ate your fly or possibly took a swat at it.

Hopefully this crash course will help the masses understand the more elusive and somewhat secretive critter we like to call a fishing guide. Now if someone could streamline the female dialects and the true meanings of their groans......