“So, this guy wanders over to my table as I’m eating dinner and tells me to pick a card, any card. So, I pick one. Remember this, it’s the five of diamonds. Then, the guy says put it back in the deck. So, I do. He shuffles the cards and get this, he throws them all over the room. There are cards everywhere. In the potted plants, in the coq au vin, in Cindy’s cleavage, believe me, everywhere. Then, he walks over to the portrait of Sir Edmund Hillary hanging on the freaking wall, pulls it toward him and a card falls into his left hand. It’s the five of diamonds. I mean, are you kidding me?”

This epiphany came to me while I thought about Isla Fisher’s next movie, “Now You See Me” which premiers next week. I like magic. I like going to see it live. I’ve gone to see Ricky Jay perform, I’ve gone to the Magic Castle, I’ve watched those Fox magician specials narrated by Mitch Pileggi and I’ve enjoyed each and every one of those. But, I’ll be damned if I could explain it to you and have you share the joy that I felt at watching Ricky Jay deal himself four aces, but I know it has more to do with the magician than the magic itself. I think I’ll do much better at describing what makes Isla’s top five movies, because those moments are captured forever in the same way for all of us.

5. Hot Rod

I think daredevils are not far removed from magicians, except that stories get a lot better when falling, fire and explosions are involved. This movie might not be great, but it has “Deadwood” alum Ian McShane along with Andy Samberg, Will Arnett, Bill Hader, Danny McBride and Isla.

4. Burke and Hare

Not only does this movie have Simon Pegg and Andy Serkis in the title roles, it adds Jessica Hynes (Pegg’s “Spaced” co-star), Tom Wilkinson and Tim Curry to go along with Isla. I would try to compare grave robbing to daredevilry and magic, but I think I’ve blasted this forced theme into a flight of doves.

3. I Heart Huckabees

I don’t think I’d ever seen a movie like this one when I stepped into the theater that fateful day in 2004. I don’t think I’ve seen a movie like it since. I have no clue if that’s a good or bad thing to this day.

2. The Lookout

Did you know that “Now You See Me” is also about bank heists just like this movie? Now you do and I don’t have to labor to try to connect bank robbery to magic.

1. Wedding Crashers

A very funny movie and that marked the first pairing of Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson. We’ll see if they still have that same “magic” the week after next with “The Internship.”

Agree? Disagree? Which movies would make your Isla Fisher top five?

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The last line about coasting is really at the heart of the struggle. I’ve been in a couple relationships that were good, but not great…say a 7 out of 10. Honestly, it was hard for me to find anything wrong with the relationship, except for this deep knowledge in my lizard brain that something wasn’t quite right. It would take me a long time to cut the cord. Sometimes over a year. Every guy I know has been in this situation.

Before I proceed, lemme say this. Girlfriends have accused me of not putting in the effort to make a relationship work…basically, they’d say I’d bail too soon. Chicks sometimes call this being a commitment-phobe. I don’t think that’s accurate. I’ve known plenty of relationships that worked initially, and worked for a long time (several years), but eventually fell apart because of deep capability issues that surfaced. I’ve got a handful of close friends whose marriages followed that template. I’ve also had a couple of relationships where I put in a tremendous amount of work, and had nothing to show for it. So I know how it works.

What’s worse? Getting out early when you know it’s not right or hang on for 5 years then bail? For me, it’s an easy decision. You get out early when you know it’s not right. You’re doing both parties a favor when you make that decision.

The Key Factor

I’ve been in two really awesome relationships. Those relationships exploded for whatever reason down the road, but the thing they both had in common was that the chicks inspired me. What that means is I felt inspired to be a better overall human; I was more generous, more loving, more truthful, and experienced more growth as a person while in the relationship. The conversation was always good and the sex was even better. I sought to improve myself in every way because I wanted to be the guy she admired.

So my key favor is INSPIRATION. If I’m inspired by my partner, I know I’m in the right place. The relationship is working and it’s worth it to move forward. If there is no inspiration, then the relationship is really just a fancy companionship or a partnership. Those aren’t real relationships…they’re just a way to pass the time.

If I don’t feel the inspiration, then I’ll break it off as soon as possible.

One warning, don’t confuse inspiration for lust. Lust is great, and it makes you do some cool stuff for your girl, but it’s not what you build a relationship on. Inspiration is more about becoming a better person, improving your inner game, and personal growth.

Morgan was born to former slaves in Paris, Kentucky, a town whose name has to be a cruel joke at the expense of everyone who lives there. It must have been rough, because Morgan moved to Cincinnati when he was fourteen to find work.

That’s worth pausing to think about for a second. When I was fourteen, I was playing Evander Holyfield’s Real Deal Boxing and worrying about zits. When Garrett Morgan was fourteen, the Sega Genesis wasn’t even a distant dream, he probably still had to worry about zits, and he had to find a man’s job in Cincinnati, of all places.

Morgan found work as a handyman for a rich guy and hired a tutor out of his own pocket so he could continue his studies. From there, he moved to Cleveland and got a job as a sewing machine repairman, and word got out that he was really good at fixing things.

He was also good at inventing them, as it turned out. After hearing about the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire that killed 146 people, he invented a safety hood and smoke protector system to protect firefighters (and their lungs) from excess smoke inhalation. He was able to sell his gas mask, which is ultimately what his system became, around the country, but often had to hire white actors to pose as its inventor. It always breaks my heart a little to read that sort of thing.

Morgan couldn’t even demonstrate how his invention worked without a disguise, and often pretended to be an Indian from the Walpole Island First Nation in Canada when the time came to show audiences how it worked.

And it did work. In fact, it made national headlines when Garrett and three other people used the mask to save workers after a tunnel explosion under Lake Erie in 1916. In yet another indictment of the times,Cleveland’s newspapers and city officials ignored Morgan’s role in the rescue, and the poor guy went unrecognized for years.

Luckily, he wasn’t unsuccessful. Morgan ended up owning several businesses, including a hair refining company that sold another one of his inventions, a hair straightening cream. His contributions to the city of Cleveland were eventually recognized within his lifetime, and his legacy is that of an intelligent, prominent, and heroic man in his own time. As it should be.

Here’s a fun video about him in case you feel like researching further.

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STAR Trek, that is. See what we did there? Oh, well. In any case. Listen: There’s a new Star Trek movie out. And it looks mighty fine and well worth the $14 or so that we’ll be spending at the theater. But part of the big reason why that is is because of the inclusion of the lovely Zoe Saldana who is, quite honestly, one of the most attractive women working today. So in honor of her gracing the silver screen once again in her role in the space franchise, we have decided to devote today’s Hot Lady Of The Week passage to her lovely looks. Enjoy!

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All of the following techniques are quite old, yet men still try to use them only to get caught out. If you’re going to produce a textbook approach to picking up, be aware that many women know about the most famous tools for picking up.

Negging

Deliberately making a woman feel bad- for example, telling her that she’s got lipstick all over her teeth or that her hands are big for her height- is not a technique she will take kindly to unless she’s already under your spell. I suspect negging was invented by someone who wanted to sabotage the competition by setting other guys up to fail. More importantly, it’s also a very well-known technique. This is the one that most women know. It’s the example that’s always given when women are talking about the pick-up scene. It’s not that they haven’t heard of any others, but they remember this one because it’s shocking the first time you hear it.

“What are your thoughts on [random unexpected topic]?”

Asking weird questions can work if you are extremely charismatic. Otherwise, you will either come off as weird in a bad way, or it will be obvious that you have planned ahead. This sentence structure is particularly well known to women, because it is used for far too many canned lines. Anyone that has watched a TV show or a read an editorial about the PUA industry will recognise this trick, even if you try to package it in a slightly different way. By all means try to have a memorable conversation, but it should flow naturally as part of the conversation. She will be particularly critical at the start of your interaction, so using a “what are your thoughts on…” line as an opener is guaranteed to fail if she’s heard it before.

Cold reading

You need a very gullible woman to firstly, believe that you can tell things about her personality from looking at her palms/horoscope/bowel movements, and secondly, not have heard of cold reading before. Women know that guys attempt to play the mystic to get in their pants. Unfortunately, this technique has been around for way too long for most women to fall for it anymore. It’s one thing to make a seemingly insightful observation about her, but quite another to claim that you can read her aura. A sceptical woman will never fall for it, and will most likely know that you got the idea from reading an e-book.

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This is kind of the same thing as starting up our own business. And while we certainly have many tips that we could offer you, we are not yet comfortable saying that we’re “experts” in any way. So today we’re heading to AskMen.com where they have a list of ways to get your business off the ground. Among their tips:

Consider your motivations

I suppose there’s no bad reason to catch the entrepreneurial bug, but some are better than others. If you simply had a bad week at work or have a boss you dislike in a career you otherwise enjoy, that’s probably not enough to motivate you to really throw yourself into creating something on your own. Do you do something so well that you could leave the confines of corporate America and still make money? Have you thought of something that doesn’t yet exist? Do you want to change the world? Do you see few other viable options? For my part, while my job search is still ongoing, I figured if no one else would, I should at least be able to hire myself.

So head on over to the link for the rest of the tips and get that business started, tell your current boss where to stick it, and then start working for yourself. Nothing is better.

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Untucked shirt

Tucking in your shirt to your jeans makes you look much neater and sharper than letting it hang loose. Tucking it in doesn’t mean you don’t need to look like a school teacher. It is still a fairly laidback look to wear jeans belted low on your hips with a dress shirt tucked in. An untucked shirt shows that you know better than to wear a collarless tee shirt, but you don’t care about the finishing touches. It is even worse to wear a tie with an untucked shirt. Unless you’re going somewhere particularly swanky, you probably shouldn’t be wearing a tie. If you’re going to wear a tie anyway, at least tuck in your shirt and button it up properly.

Black sneakers

Black shoes are a good start, but runners in disguise fool nobody. Wearing black runners means that you will find yourself rejected from many a club. If you manage to find a venue where the person on the door is near-sighted enough to miss your horrible shoes, you will find yourself being judged on your shoes by other patrons. You’ll be that guy sitting in the corner crying into his drink because his shoes are too ugly for anyone to talk to him.

Hoodie

Nothing says “I just came from the gym and I haven’t had time to hit the showers” like a fleecy sweater in a nightclub. It tends to be fairly toasty inside nightclubs, so you don’t need to wear a hoodie. You may want to wear something to keep you warm for the trip there, but ditch it in the cloakroom. Also, you shouldn’t be wearing anything made from fleece when you go out. A leather jacket is much more stylish.

Shorts

Shorts look good on very few men. Unfortunately they’re inevitable in hot weather, but completely avoidable when you go out. Before you leave for a night out, look in the mirror and ask yourself if your pants are pants. If they are, you’re off to a good start. If not, they are quite possibly shorts which should not be worn out to a club. Nobody wants to feel your hairy, sweaty leg brush past them on the dancefloor.

A cap

Hats can make for great accessories- when you’re outdoors. Wearing a cap inside is rude and makes no sense because it’s not about to start raining indoors. At a nightclub, it’s also bound to get stolen by someone who thinks it’s hilarious to grab it. If you’re lucky, a flirt will pluck your hat off your head and put it on, but she’ll probably disappear with it. The next thing you know, you see your hat participating in a sweaty make-out session in the corner without you, and it would just be awkward to retrieve it.

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It’s probably no secret that self-proclaimed “nice guys” aren’t as other-oriented as their behavior may seem. Most guys who are nice on the outside are really just using their “niceness” as a manipulation strategy to get what they want: the girl whose ass they’re kissing.

However, this doesn’t mean a guy needs to become a raging douche bag to avoid “niceness.” There’s nothing wrong with being a “good guy” who simply displays characteristics of an attractive guy.

For years, I struggled to unravel this seemingly paradoxical mindset. How can I be a strong, attractive man while simultaneously not compromising who I was at my core? I eventually found my answer when learning how to cold approach women…

For the first two decades of my life, I never dreamed of “approaching” a girl who didn’t seem to “like” me, and I certainly not a girl I didn’t know. Yet, let’s be honest here: the only way the majority of guys are ever going to improve the quality and quantity of their dating life is by learning to approach women.

And I was no different. To date the girls I really wanted, to become the man I was afraid to become. That meant I had to change my mindset so that approaching women was just a part of who I was. After years of approaching women myself, as well as teaching other guys to approach women, I arrived at the attitude I believe ever guys needs to adopt to maximize his dating life.

Face It: You’re a Narcissist

The first thing you need to realize is that by NOT approaching women, you’re being a narcissist. Be honest: the only thing stopping you from approaching attractive women is your fear of rejection. The reason you fear rejection is because you want to control other people’s opinion of you.

I’ve coached hundreds of guys personally, and I know what stops them from approaching hot women is the fear that their family, friends, bystanders, or the girl herself will “judge” them. Essentially these guys value someone else’s opinion of them over what they know they really want to do. Hence why guys turn to booze to help them get over their anxiety. All getting drunk does is help silence our inner narcissist.

It’s my job to get guys in that state without alcohol. To do that, you have to acknowledge your “nice” side, not ignore it. If you truly consider yourself a “good” guy, then you have to concede that you care about the happiness and well being of the girl you want to approach.

As such, if you know that you’re a good guy and yet you’re not approaching women, then you’re letting her down. You’re letting some other loser, who probably isn’t as good of guy as you are, approach and attract her. Because of your narcissism, you’re forcing a beautiful woman to settle for less. Proud of yourself? You shouldn’t be…

Face Your Fear, Narcissist

If this line of thinking doesn’t motivate you, you’re still a narcissist—it’s just that you don’t care about the wellbeing of women that much. If that’s the case, then realize this: no one gives a fuck about you. Go out to a nightclub and see if you can pick out the guys who have gotten “rejected” by women. You can’t. Want to know why? Because you don’t care about a bunch of strangers in a nightclub.

And to everyone whose opinion you value so dear, to them, you’re just a stranger in a nightclub. You’re not some celebrity who has the paparazzi trailing your every move. You’re not some big shot, where people will think you’re less cool if you get rejected. They don’t think you’re cool or uncool…THEY JUST DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU.

Take Control

So why are you giving a fuck about them. In fact, you’re giving such a fuck, you big narcissist you, that you’re putting YOUR life on hold over what a STRANGER thinks about you! Even if it’s your friends—or even family—who opinion you’re trying to “preserve” just always remind yourself of that: you’re not doing something that you want to do—living your life how you want to be living it—because of what someone else MAY think of you.

I always find it hilarious ironic that most guys disregard most of what their friends and family tell them, but when it comes to girls, suddenly their “reputation” is so damn important. Guess what? That’s just a cop-out for being lazy and a coward. If you’re not approaching women, it’s because you’re afraid. Nothing else.

Now that you’ve read those words, you can’t unread them. How many more girls are you going to lose, how many more opportunities are you going to blow, and how many more times are you going to bang your head up against the wall, until you finally just put one foot in front of the other and approach that girl? Man up. Get over yourself. Get girls.

>>>To Learn More From Rob, Check Out “The 4 Elements of Game” where he breaks down game into four simple adjustments.

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So today we’re heading over to Men’s Fitness where they have a list of ways to boost your energy. And it’s not just coffee. For example:

Eat Your Magnesium

“Research shows that when the body doesn’t have enough magnesium, a mineral that is found in our bones, tissues, and organs, it has an increased need for oxygen during exercise—in other words, you wear out more easily,” explains Rachel Meltzer Warren, MS, RD, a New York-based nutritionist. “Magnesium is found in foods like spinach, almonds, cashews, and soybeans.” Keep a plethora of nuts on hand for quick energy boosts. Experts have also found that increased magnesium levels help assist chronic sleep problems—another fast track to more energy! For maximum absorption be sure to eat your magnesium-rich foods with a serving of calcium, or take a 500 mg supplement of it.

So get on over there and start purchasing some of these other ways to boost that energy of yours. And then get rid of that groggy feeling and start getting into that energized lifestyle!

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Common Dating and Pickup Questions Answered

In this collection of articles from the TSB Archives we answer some of the most common questions that we’ve gotten from our readers over the years.

Phone Game Basics (for when you can’t take):  Rob gives a real good breakdown of how you should handle phone calls for the situations in which texting is not appropriate.

Texting a Girl: A Guide to Text Message Game:  Since we just covered phone game in the above article, lets look back at an article from four years ago on text game.

How to Pickup a Bartender:  This is an article I wrote detailing exactly what you need to do if you want to pick up a bartender.

What to Say to Girls (explained):  The ability to talk is the surest way you’ll get into a girls pants.  This articles highlights what sort of things you need to be saying to her to increase the likelihood she becomes attracted to you.

3 Ways to Kill Any Attraction a Girl Feels Toward You: This article I outline 3 of the ways you can quickly kill any attraction that a girl feels toward you.

How to Pickup a Stripper and other advice:  Darren provides some excellent advice on what it takes to pull a stripper and get her out on a date with you. He also answers a few more questions about same night lays and students struggling to improve.

3 Questions about “Dance Floor Game”:  I had a chance to interview my friend Ryan who teaches “dance floor game.”  For those of you looking to score girls in clubs, this is a must read article.

How to Write Your Online Dating Profile:  Dave M. tackles one of the biggest questions guys have about creating an online dating profile.. what the hell do I write?

Outgoing with Friend? Shy on Dates?:  Here’s a question I answered from a guy who faced a similiar problem that I used to face.  He is normal and fun with his friends, but turns into a boring dork on a date.

How to Handle “Whisky Dick”:  Here’s another question I get a lot.

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