Long Summary:
I never really got to blog about the True Love Waits Retreat 2010, that was collaborated between SJBCI and OHIC.  The two youth groups were present, with a total of 40 registrants, and about 10 teachers/helpers. 

We prayed for this retreat, really asking God to speak to these young people, and He didn’t just speak to them, there was a time at that retreat when you could honestly feel the Holy Spirit convicting everyone in the room, even myself.  I remember going in the middle of the room taking pictures, and while I was listening to a simple song being sung by just two people on one guitar, I felt the need to get on the floor, stop taking pictures, and just sit down, in awe.  I looked up, looked around and realized that I wasn’t the only one.  Tears started coming down for these youth.  Tears started coming down for Marchesa 12 years ago, and the realization of the person God has raised since then.  I honestly struggled within those few minutes, walking to the back so no one would notice.  I finally got the strength to pick up my lens and start shooting pictures again, knowing they would be blessed by what I was witnessing.

I believe with my whole heart that all those youth were being broken.  I went to the front of the room because I was one of the people to pray over them.  As I waited for them to come up one by one, I heard Pstr. Jus give the altar call, and to my surprise, they didn’t come up trickling slowly, but as a herd.  They came up, quickly, without hesitance, most ardently!  I was in amazement and overwhelmed, wishing there were more leaders who could pray over every individual with a personal prayer.  I saw Rogie having to pray for more than one person at a time.  I had to try to give time to each person close to me, people who were bawling, crying, uncontrollably weeping, and I felt almost helpless.  But I was overjoyed with what God was doing in their lives at that moment, knowing it wasn’t a result, but a pivotal point in their purpose.  As I prayed one by one, I felt myself empathizing for them, for each one who had their head bowed down, just weeping.  I heard other people praying, Pstr.Justin speaking, and stifled cries.

I closed the altar call in prayer, and was blessed… After everyone dispersed, I hugged a lot of my youth, and felt like a proud mom. We had the bonfire that night, and so many of them really opened up, even the “shy” ones.  

I’m really thankful for such a blessed retreat.  I could have prayed, planned, and hoped, but God was the only one to bless, convict, change, and deliver.  Thank you Lord.

I also need to say thanks to all the leaders and teachers. Their preparation and dedication to follow through to the end was such an encouragement, knowing that the retreat wasn’t just a convenience, but a priority.  Ken, Sarah, Genny, Rogie, and Pastor Jus, God bless you for your service and passion for these youth.

Her first day wasn’t as bad, for her! hahah.  When asked how her day went, she excitedly recounted fun stories.  When asked if she cried, she nonchalantly responded, no.

This was not the response the night before her 1st day, when she cried before going to bed, asking why moms weren’t allowed to come with their sweethearts.  After a tiresome spur of the moment trip to Great Adventure that day, to celebrate her last day of scholastic freedom, I used a very simple metaphor to ease her feelings of emotional attachment.

I explained that going to school is like going on a big ride in Great Adventure.  I’d be there to bring her to the line, prepare her for the ride, put her seatbelt on, and make sure she’s safely secure.  Then I’d wait for her outside of the gates, as she would enjoy the thrill of the ride, by herself. And afterward, at the end of the ride, I would be waiting, smile on my face, pride in my heart, for her.  School is that exciting ride for her.  And after I explained it to her, she quieted down, I guess because she could still remember the excitement, as well as the assurance, that she felt during that day.

So that morning, we quickly prepared her.  Perze took the day off to see his eldest daughter to school, AND to be there for me when I couldn’t take the reality of time.  I really love him so much for giving me what I need the most…So at the bus stop, being the first ones there, I had to stop internalizing what that day really meant, in fear that I would cry, and then creating a snowball effect that would then make Emma fear leaving.

She boarded the bus with such ease, with a huge smile looking through her tinted window.  After I said goodbye, at the house, I didn’t really feel like doing anything, crying just a few tears, I went about my day, and even slept from the fatigue and excitement of the day before.  I just kept wondering if she was sad, or if she missed me, or if she was scared.  I just wanted to protect her.

But as we walked back to the bus stop, waiting for her to come back, Perze received a phone call.  His face beamed with such pure joy; you should have seen it.  Emma had called him to tell him she was on the bus.  He was so proud of her, with this huge smile on his face, in amazement of how much of a big girl she was.  Unfortunately, she missed her stop and Perze had to turn into super dad, sprinting quickly to the next bus stop to retrieve Emma.

She told us so many stories, about being teased, about being protected, about a pretty teacher, about a sleeping boy, about the bus ride, about her teacher reading the card we inserted into her lunch bag, etc.  In a nutshell, she loved school.

In a nutshell, I also owe Perze a Red Lobster dinner for losing our bet.  I thought she’d cry in school, but to my surprise, she definitely has a strong heart.  I don’t really credit it to all the preparation.  I know deep down, it was because we prayed so much for Emma as she attended her first day.  I know people in church and in our family prayed for her as well.  That morning, the first thing I did to prepare was to be on my knees.  And the last thing Perze did before she left the house was to pray for her. Thank you Lord for going before her.  Deut.31:8

“The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

We opted to get a digital for now so the volume can be controlled.  Kids learning piano tend to pound on the keys (experience talking).  So they’ll be able to play it day or night.  Also, it’s easier for me to control the volume when the girls are sleeping.  It also has touch sensitivity and the keys are weighted, which is important for any piano player, to building finger strength. 

The sound is pretty good for what you pay for, but I’m so accustomed to the real sound of piano hammers hitting the strings.  But, this is a great practice piano for now.  Maybe when we have a bigger place and the kids are better at playing, we can invest in an acoustic instrument.  Only pain is having to get it tuned all the time…I always hated that, growing up with the upright piano at home.  But the sound is so authentic.  I love the piano we have at my mom’s. 

So here it is…our first piano!  Thank You Lord for your many blessings.  Now, hopefully, I can practice, instead of relying on sight reading so much. 

1. tatay
2. mama
3. Ate
4. wow
5. baby
6. apple
7. woof
8. ewe
9. uh-oh
10. bop!
11. uh-uh (to convey ‘no’..while shaking her head)
12. up
13. hi
14. bye
15. dede (filipino word to convey she wants to nurse)
16. beep-beep
17. yay
18. milk (mih)
19. there it is (tey-eh-ye)
20. tito
21. huh?
22. shhh!
23. cheese

She also has a picture/word book given to her from tita cherms and she can use her pointer finger to show me where objects are if I ask her.  For example, if I ask her where the fish is, she’ll point to its corresponding picture.

She responds so well and can understand when I make requests.  I can even ask her, “where’s my iPhone, Zi?” and she’ll grab it from the end of the room and give it to me.  Promise, I never consciously taught her it was an iPhone.

it’s good seeing my brother again. it’s nice seeing all the kids circle around him.  they really love their tito and how he involves himself with them.  Last week, emma’ cried after seeing a picture of them together.  She thought his absence was too long.

Zi, however, is still very hesitant to play with him.

“path of meditation”

black & white. 2010

this is why i woud LOVE to be a fashion designer.