Purple thoughts,Violet images

The Ballad of Bomberman - Act 2

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sun, 21 Nov 2010 12:40:00 +0000

Act 2: Timing is Everything

11:30 am, November 16,2010

Location- Dept. of Fuel and Mineral Engg.

After the heroics displayed by me on Monday(Act 1- The printing press), I was elated and elevated. Although what I did was not by societal standards a good deed, I still wanted to believe that I had in some way broken out of a cage.My firm belief that exams, or for that matter vivas,could not be cleared without decent preparation,had been shattered to bits. The fear before Material Handling exam had been replaced with a sense of pride and freedom. But I had decided that that was the first and the last time. No more of such irresponsible behaviour from now onwards. Hah! What a joke!

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5 pm Monday evening, I was done with my first prac. The week had 3 more vivas on the menu. And the next one-Physical Separation, was going to be served with breakfast on Tuesday morning at 10 o'clock. While all the guys were discussing how 'Mandrake'(Phy. Separation prof.) would rape each and every student of Vth MLE, I was already on my way out of the campus. I needed some air. I mean all this panicky behaviour just turns me off.

And 'Mandrake'? Come on! He is nothing! Well, his actual name is N.R Mandre. I christened him 'Mandrake' after the famous cartoon character. That is because our beloved professor has the very special quality of magically removing smiles from the faces of his students and replace them with creases of tension. He once caught me in class while I was busy examining a hair that had come off my scalp while I was removing my cap. I have been an eternal back bencher in his class.I didn't pay much attention to his scolding, because he's an a** anyway! But I do remember his comparing me to a donkey and moron and officially declaring that I would never be a good mineral engineer! Like I ever wanted to be one!

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9:30 pm Monday night

I had just come back to my room and as usual it had more occupants than the two beds in it could support. I gave the tress passers an I-want-to-sleep-get-the-f***-out-of-my room look and after 15 minutes I was in my dream world. It was something about me and my girlfriend and some regular college stuff thrown in.

7:30 am Tuesday morning

I woke up with my girlfriend's good morning SMS. The morning was already doomed. I had Mandrake waiting to rape me, and I didn't even cared to buy some 'protection'! I hurriedly completed my unfinished practical notebook. That took about an hour. Brushing, bathing and breakfast took another half an hour. I spent the remaining 1 hour playing PacMan and Poker on my Manish's laptop. I had decided I would just ask questions from the guys going in before me. The easy way out, as always!

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Before I tell you how I fared in my viva, let me describe the scene and position of all the characters and elements in the room. On the other side of a huge antique table- Kalicharan, Mandrake, and their sidekick LK-our three nemesis. On this side of the table- Me,Baul the stupid,Nanga the alcoholic,Reja the topper ,Purwar the overconfident a** and Manish the laptop guy!

6 on 3...sounds good,right? Well, me and Reja were the best prepared guys in the group, so now you can see the odds were not really in our favour.

Mandrake fired the first shot. He inquired from LK about our attendances in lab throughout the semester and Baul and Purwar came out to be defaulters. First blood!

Mandrake ordered us all to write down one practical each that we had performed in the lab.Nanga was the first one to finish. But hardly did he realize what a blunder he had just made. As soon as his pen stopped, Mandrake and Kalicharan directed their guns towards him. The started questioning him alternately and soon we bid farewell to Nanga. Three men down in the first 5 minutes!

Seeing Nange's fate, me,Reja and Manish slowed down our pens. We were buying time, because each group was being held captive for around 20 minutes. I had been thrown a relatively easy practical at me, one which I knew about. My finishing coincided with Kalicharan leaving the room on account of some urgent work. Great!3 on 2 now!

Mandrake asked me the basic principle of the experiment I had written down. Piece of cake. But before I could open my mouth, his cellphone interrupted(with the worst ringtone I have ever heard in my life)! Reja had engaged LK in a duel,Manish was still writing and I had a few minutes to spare.I was so excited at my good luck that I quietly took out my cellphone and messaged my girlfriend-"Viva going on.I am doing good!". She replied with a string of question marks. I decided not to reply. And it was a good decision because just as I slipped the phone back in my pocket, Mandrake returned.

I answered his question and after that he asked a tricky question related to diamagnetism and paramagnetism. Now this was his trump card- Divide and destroy! All six of us looked at each other, not sure what to do. Purwar,Baul and Manish stuck to one theory, Nanga kept quiet, Reja gave one of his own and I decided to stick to mine. And luckily for me, I turned out to be the correct one! That impressed Mandre,or maybe my wearing a shirt impressed him. Whatever, the impression did not last long, as he scolded us all for being the worst batch in the history of Mineral Engineering. It was a ritual every incoming group had to undergo before going out. But I knew I had done well!

PS- I still wonder,"What if I had decided to reply to my girlfriend and Mandrake would have caught me with a cellphone in my hand in the middle of a viva?"

The Ballad of Bomberman - Act 1

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sat, 20 Nov 2010 19:19:00 +0000

Act 1: The Printing Press
4:30 pm,November 15,2010

Location: Dept. of Mechanical Engg.

"Abey jaldi chhap! Aankh band karke chhap!"- Vikas, my room mate, and currently my saviour, was prompting me with hushes.

"Abey tu bas likhta jaa, maine yahan printing press khol di hai!" - Me,a topper of my times, currently at the mercy of others, was boasting shamelessly!

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I was blindly copying whatever Vikas was writing down in his answer sheet. His writing would have been barely legibly in normal circumstances, but this was examination time!

Desperate situations call for desperate measures!

My head was tilted 60 degree away from Vikas's copy, my left hand was covering my roving eyes, and my eyelids had been strictly instructed not to bat. In all, I was 'in the zone'! It's a term usually applied to sports persons when they are giving a performance of their lifetime. Well, I considered myself not less than Sachin Tendulkar en route to a 200 there!

I had completed the practical file in the morning itself. So,being ready for the written exam was a deed I could think of performing in the next life only. I had just skimmed through the practicals and had half heartedly listened to another one of those 'enlightening GD sessions' of the 'genius' guys of the branch.Moreover, my room mate had prepared a day in advance, so by engineering college standards, I had prepared well for the exam!

The professor and his side kick research scholar were pieces of cake to get through while cheating. But my inquisitive a** was the only enemy in the field! I mean, I was prepared like shit, I had no F-ing idea what the answers were, and here I was, pointing out errors in Vikas's answer sheet. The guts!

We were literally having a discussion in the middle of an exam there. And Vikas had to convince me that his answers were right and I could copy them safely,without the fear of failing(like if I refused to copy them, the professor would pass me on account of my honesty and perseverance to copy only the 100% correct answer!) Finally, the honest cheater inside me gave in and I started 'Xeroxing' his answer sheet.

'WE' breezed through the 50 minute 60 marker. Actually it was Vikas who breezed through,I just hung on to him with tightly! In the end, it didn't matter that much, because rumour had it that the professor was not going to check the copies anyway and would give an 8 pointer to everyone,at the least!

So much for being an adamant a** in the middle of an exam!

PS- There are two ways to excelling in an exam. Studying well. Or copying well!

Coming up Act 2...

To be or not to be

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Wed, 17 Nov 2010 06:59:00 +0000

My very close friend is going through a tough time. I can't name him for obvious reasons, but since he is as good a friend as it gets, it gives me shivers to look at his pathetic condition. And guess what can be the reason of his sad state? Well, it's a girl. But don't get it wrong. It's not those stereotypical 'one sided love affair' or 'rejected and dejected' or even 'loved and lost' affairs. It's hard to be 'adjectivated' or 'typified'. So here's what it is....as he told me...

He likes her.She likes him.

He doesn't know if he loves her. But he is sure it's the closest to love he has been in his life. She loves him.

He wants to be with her. She wants to be with him.

He is with her.She is with him.For now.

His mom might agree to her. Her parents might also agree to him.

He would probably tell his mom about her. She would definitely never tell her parents about him.

So he can't be with her.She can't be with him. Forever.

He can't leave her right now because she needs him. He wants to be there for her...with her.

But, when the time is right and she is okay with him leaving her, what if he needs her then?

And what if that time never arrives?What if she always needs him? He is sure he can never say 'no' to her for anything. What will he do then?

Now I don't know what to tell him that will make him feel good. I am afraid of the fact that they are going to lose each other. The pinching part is,as he says, their feelings will never be lost. I hope he gets out of this. And gets out without a broken heart.

PS- Since skeptics would anyway think it's me writing in the disguise of my friend, I won't make a clarification. I just want to say, if it was me, I wouldn't be writing it down. I would be doing something about it!

Evanescent Happiness

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sun, 07 Nov 2010 06:33:00 +0000

"The only thing more beautiful than a relationship without a name is a relationship that needs none!"

I've experienced both....I enjoyed both...and then reality struck me with a fatal blow! Fatal enough to bring me back to life. To the harsh, cold realities of life.

If a dream is worse than reality, we always have the choice of waking up. But what if the dream is better than reality? Can we sleep forever? Can I sleep forever?

PS- My earlier post, as misinterpreted by some, was not about my ex-girlfriend(s)...the 'he' in that post was intentional. There's not just one kind of relationship whose loss can be mourned,is it?

That won't bring me back to you

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sat, 06 Nov 2010 12:18:00 +0000

"Wish you a very happy and prosperous 'DEWALI'. Take care of ur health & study beacuse only these 2 things r important in life & future.kabhi dil kare to bat kar lena tab shayad mujhe samajh pao. i m waiting.ok take care."

The sender of this SMS was close to me once. Then the sender made a mistake that ruined everything. I tried to stop the sender from choosing the wrong path. But the sender was adamant. The sender had become selfish, so he couldn't see what he wanted to do was ruining not only our relationship, but was tearing away several other relationships that were dear to both of us. Now, it's too late to mend those mistakes. The wounds might heel with time, but the scars will be there forever.

I don't remember for how long we haven't talked.

If you can read this, then you should know that sending greetings on festivals and birthdays won't undo what you did to me and my family.

You yearn to talk to me? You want to hear my voice? You ache to listen to my words?

Your punishment is not my words and my anger, your punishment is my silence and my indifference!

Micropost #001

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Mon, 01 Nov 2010 13:41:00 +0000

Whoa! Third year is really turning up the heat now!! Never thought I would find myself so busy in this otherwise laid-back place. Suddenly, a 24 hour day has started appearing unfair. And I am faced with one of those situations that make my face go pale and my hair turn gray.(Talking of hair, I recently had a haircut; that, when I promised myself for the zillionth time that I would grow my hair long! Making false promises to myself, that's damn pathetic!)
I have to prioritize. I hate prioritizing. It is so unfair. Why can't I do all the things all the time?Or maybe things I like at times I like? No sir, it has to done by the clock. It's like:"Work now, you can enjoy later".Now,this 'later' is a dangerous word. The event of occurrence of 'later' has probability tending to zero. I have been waiting for 'later' since 11th grade. It hasn't arrived yet.
Anyway, since time for me these days is an asset, I'll wrap this up in short: I am busy, I am confused, I am cornered and I have to make some life changing decisions.Now.

PS- Finally, my dream of owning a net book looks like becoming a reality. The bad thing is, Mom has not said yes still. The good thing is, she hasn't said 'no' either!(All previous attempts were met with an outright rejection). So, I am in the maybe zone. Living on hopes, that is.

Their Days, Our Nights

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Wed, 06 Oct 2010 19:08:00 +0000

At sunrise the lifeless boys rise,

Ready for the labourous day ahead.

It comes to one as a big surprise,

How these future engineers are 'practically' dead.

Lectures are just a way to fill pages,

Consuming more ink than mind.

Concepts, theories and discussions are absent,

Bundles of notes are what one may find.

Practicals are just a time fill,

Neatly prepared reports are all THEY desire.

Examinations are a test of mugging power,

Reproduction of notes is what THEY require.

As the sun sets, the lifeless boys change.

The life that was squeezed out now returning.

All the grind of the day now forgotten,

And the fire of youth starts burning.

Desires are fulfilled, dreams are chased,

Life is lived under the moonlight.

Like nocturnal creatures they come out of a hole,

To make merry-revelry throughout the night.

Thus the lifeless boys live day after day,

With tradition and logic engaged in a fight.

They will not lose their passion come what may,

For THEY may have the days, but WE have the nights.

(Dedicated to life at ISM, originally written on December 3, 2008)

PS- "Engineer banne aaya tha, gadha ban gaya"...

'Horror' scope!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sat, 02 Oct 2010 06:53:00 +0000

Good morning Varun Tyagi! It's Saturday the 2nd of Oct, 1130 hours IST and here's a look into your near future:-

Education/ Career

You have your mid semester exams from Monday. Seeing your preparation and your inclination to do everything other than studying, it can be safely predicted that you are going to screw up again!

Also your attendances are at an all-time low, so if you were thinking of staying back at home for Diwali at least this year, you might as well throw that thought outta window!

Travel

You forgot to book tickets for your return journey after Dusshera vacations. The magic ball (aka the crappy site of IRCTC) shows that now you can do anything from pulling your hair off your head or sell your soul to Satan but you won't be coming back to college on a confirmed reservation!

You even forgot to book tickets for that Dehradun-Mussoorie trip your beloved mom so eagerly planned out. In the next few hours you're gonna face her fury over the phone when you tell her how your lazy ass has almost jeopardized the entire trip.

Financial Matters

Congratulations! You are neck deep in debts, thanks to some whole hearted spendings lately! You don't even remember how much you spent and where! It is suggested that you better cover up these transactions( with special aid from Sister Charity) before Reserve Bank of Home gets a hint of your insolvency and declares you bankrupt!

Health

Your sleep cycle is facing disturbances of the same scale as being observed in the rain cycles of North India! Exercising is slowly sliding into backseat, not a good sign for someone who has been working out for a coveted 6-pack!

Romance

You seem to be confused! The cards dealt to you are a tricky lot. Play with caution.

PS- Piggy Chops has made me crazy with her look in Anjaana Anjaani. Too hot to handle! I love you ( drooling all over the place)!!!

Writing is in the genes

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 19:06:00 +0000

Okay now I was wondering how I got this literary bug in me? I mean I write well. Well enough to be complimented for that. So where exactly it comes from? My dad cannot write for nuts.He is a government employee. Indian government employees are not in the habit of writing. They can be Olympic champions at debating and criticizing their government, but writing is not their cup of coffee( tea, for Indians). My sister is a boring CA. The only writing she did was when she was en-route to topping one hard ass exam after another. Now she types, balance sheets and stuff. But no writing. That zeroed in all my suspicions on Mom. But I haven't seen her writing.Still that was circumstantial evidence towards her innocence.
But now she has been caught in the act. Of late, she has been living alone. Don't worry it's not a family trouble. It's just that dad's gotta transfer, didi got married in January this year and so Mom had no choice left. And this sudden loneliness has caused her to slip into depression. It is understandable, given her age and all. Okay, back to the point. So, I was talking to her on the phone yesterday when she dropped the bomb. She told me she had written a short story. What? When? How? She casually told me that she has always been into writing. She used to write in college too. And now when she has all the time in the world, why not return to writing? Aaaahh....so my suspicions were correct after all. Like all the other good things in me, this one's from mom too. Love you mom!

Free is not always a good thing!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 18:17:00 +0000

Yes, believe me it isn't. Free messages for instance. I know what you are going to say. I am always cribbing about this kinda stuff. Yes, I am. Any normal human being with a desire to live peacefully would do the same. Yes, I hate miscalls.(See 'The Misscall Generation') But, free messages? Come on, that's hitting under the belt! I mean, it's like suddenly I see I-have-free-sms-to-annoy-you-24*7 people all around me. Everyday, I get ~~dozens~~ ~~hundreds~~ thousands of smses.The so stereotypical and out of fashion Santa-Banta jokes( come on dude, hasn't anyone heard of Little Johnny?), the sentimental craps, relationshits, the 'morals and wisdom ones', the utterly useless 'send me backs', the spooky chain smses, the know ur lover/future/fucker types...my life has become an Inbox, if nothing else.

I know friends, you have my number. I gave it to you myself. On the belief that you will use it when you need me. Please don't misuse my trust. I know you love me and care for me (although lately I have seriously started doubting that).

You wake me up in the morning with CID PJ's. Isn't that cruel?

You vibrate my balls(literally) in the middle of 'an already too much of a torture' lecture. Because of you I have stopped keeping my cellphone in my jeans pocket and have to reach for my bag every time the phone buzzes. Do you realize how inconvenient that is?

Do you have any idea how many hours in a day I have to spend deleting tons of sms from my Inbox?

Do you realize each one of you sends me the exact same joke,sometimes twice and thrice? How funny would that be?

Do you know that 9 times out of 10, you wish me 'Gn/gnyt/gudnyt' in the middle of the day and wish for my good day at 11:30 pm? How very caring of you!

Do you realize that the WMD you brought for 20 bucks is available in my locality too? That I could also retaliate with gazzilions of free sms if I wanted to?

Did you actually intend to send me that 'exclusive' sms or was I just a name in a long list?

I might come across as unsocial, anti-social or even someone who has shunned sociality in any form. Someone who's all gloomy-doomy. I might look like someone who doesn't care for those who care so much for him. But, reality couldn't be farther than that. I like to laugh. I can make you laugh. For that you have to meet me. I don't need Santa/Banta's help. I am social too. But, FREE SMS IS NOT MY IDEA OF SOCIALIZING! Neither do I intend to show my care and love through constant pestering. And I sincerely expect the same from anyone who remotely wishes for my sanity, whatever is left of it that is. So if you can read this, given your busy schedule(with all that sms sending and receiving) please, in the name of GOD(whichever form you believe in) stop it. It ain't cool!

PS- Airtel, Idea, Vodafone, Uninor and all you others. Damn you all to the darkest caverns of hell! With a cellphone with only incoming facility. Free sms,huh? I'll send you free sms then!

Theory of unrelativity

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Fri, 10 Sep 2010 07:30:00 +0000

Relativity- A state of dependence in which the existence or significance of one entity is solely dependent on that of another.

So by traditional English standards (if there are any, since English is the most abused language ever invented) 'unrelativity' should refer to 'A state of dependence in which the existence or significance of one entity is solely dependent on the lack of that of another.'

Now, it might sound simple and utterly useful. But, ladies and gentleman, unrelativity is a part and parcel of our day to day lives. It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that unrelativity is the root cause of all our happiness. You don't believe me? I thought so. That's why I came prepared. Being an engineer (in the making,that is) I believe strongly in exemplifying as a method of understanding. So here's some picks from our daily lives:-

1. Your interest in your GF, your appreciation of her beauty, intelligence blah blah blah...in short the existence of your feelings and the significance of your relationship is solely dependent on the lack of a better girl in your life. The moment you see one, you are tempted to change the bus. Works the same way for girls too,

Unrelativity, you see.

2. The significance of your grades and the existence of the happiness so generated is solely dependent on the lack of better grades in class. Don't tell me you feel happy to be informed that you scored a decent B+ only to be like 49 out of 50 in class! A B+ in itself would have been nice, the chink in the armour was???.....being the second last nerdo in class!

Buddy,that's unrelativity.

3.This one's for the health conscious ones. The existence of your self confidence and the significance of your health standard in your own mind is solely dependent on the lack of the nearby presence of a supermodel or a Greek god. Guys, we all know, we don't give a rat's ass about those gigantic beer bellies, UNTIL someone we know rips off his shirt to show that envious 6-pack. I have observed this in gym too. Weaklings pose before mirror like an eight-time Mr.Olympia. Enter that buff guy, and the weakling starts feeling week again!

Unrelativity at work again.

4. The significance of your academic talent and the existence of some respect for you in your parent's eyes is solely dependent on the lack of the presence of that dreaded same-age neighbour who always notches a mark higher than you.Even his parents are not happy.Because someone else did to their son what their son did to my parent's son! Why do parents always have to compare their kids? I wonder how our dads would feel when we'll start comparing them to Gates, Jobs, Ambani and Tata?

5.The existence of taste in the food in your mess is solely dependent on the lack of quality food in nearby mess. Being an engineering undergrad, I know how that delicious paneer suddenly turns tasteless when that friend from the other mess proudly shows off his rabri jalebi and sadistically winks at me!

I could give you a gazillion more examples to prove my point. Your college, your neighbourhood,your job, your home, your country, forget every other damn thing, your entire life! The significance of everything is solely dependent on the lack of presence of a better one.

But, in my experiments, I came across some anomalies too.(I told you I am an honest guy!). Two most frequently observed and most puzzling were:-

1.Your professor/boss will never be happy with you. Regardless of the lack of a better student/employee , these people will always make you feel like you are the scum of the world.

2.Any Venusian will never be happy with her figure, the lack of a better counterpart simply does not count.

So you see, unrelativity is the omnipresent phenomenon! The reason for all happiness and sanity. Hey, you white haired womanizer there, yes you Einstein, you listening to me,huh?

PS- A friend asked me to find out the difference between 'allegation' and 'elegation'.I am elated he preferred me over Google.I could even mention that in my CV,right? Anyway,here's the deal

Allegation- An unproved statement or assertion, specially in case of an accusation

Elegation- Problem solving, decision making and interpretation of data.

Of Kurt, Axl and the faltering Prof.Jha!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 08:00:00 +0000

We all listen to music. Everyone of us( except the deaf, of course!) We all have our tastes( good and bad,in some cases extremely bad!!). Of late, I have come across so much music that I have started associating each one of the songs I hear with a unique feeling it evokes in me.

Nirvana- I instantly start seeing stockpiles of Cocaine, Marijuana, LSD, syringes, spoons etc. The entire room is filled with smoke and I start drifting in air. Kurt Cobain pulls off the seemingly impossible trick of transferring his dope content to me via his songs! Nice!

Guns and Roses- Undoubtedly, my favourite band. Axl on the MIC and Slash on the guitar is something only God could've imagined! Varied feelings. Each song casts a different spell on me. On the whole they are very very enjoyable. Associated visions are those of leather jackets, boots, long hair, a dozen chicks in both arms( and a lot more running behind), which is very much responsible for GNR's top placing!

ACDC- Gawds! Seriously! Instant foot tapping! Came across "Highway to Hell' only last year and since then I think I've completed the entire discography thrice! They're completely insane (much like me) and I can't help breaking into a jig whenever Brian is on the roll!

Himesh Reshamiya- Okay, now we all have heard him some time or the other. Admit it! And insanely enough, most of us were Himess bhai's fans too! His name's spelling has seen more changes than his voice and compositions! Well, for the feeling part, I start feeling like a complete FOSLA member, who is the world record holder of the most number of rejections and heart breaks! Songs are good for those who have just had a break-up or are sure to have one soon! You are not alone guys, Himess bhai is there too!

Linkin Park- It's a loose cross between Nirvana and Himess bhai. Although the illusion is a lot more chaotic. Scary visions of world destruction, fallout, wars, Armageddon are common. Also it's a good medicine for those who believe that motivation can be achieved through listening to songs. (Believe me, it can't) LP fans are mostly global rejects, asylum inhabitants( not insane, that's different, way different!), down and out losers seeking redemption and those who believe that being a loner is a style statement.

90's Bollywood songs- Umm...err...well I don't listen to them now. I did when I was a kid. If you are feeling bored, then they can be good entertainers. You will roll off the couch laughing at the lyrics, and the videos...I can't even think about those clothes and dance steps! Thank God it's over!!

Justin Timberlake, Eminem- ATTITUDE! KICK ASS ATTITUDE! I relate to both of them highly.That's because like me, these two can make fun of anyone. JB's usual targets are his ex-GF's( whose aren't??!!) and for Eminem, everyone's a target. Hats off to both of you!

Lady Gaga, Pussycat Dolls, Shakira, Rihanna, Britney Spears, JLo- Moderated pornography! Length of dresses one-tenth of the length of songs. Never paid attention to lyrics. Was busy watching the pelvic moves and cleavage shows!

SOAD- Bang your head, break everything around you. Beat everyone around you! Take off your clothes! Act like a money!( Caution- Never, and I mean never ever listen to SOAD at home...there will be no doubt left in your parents' minds that you need a shrink!)

Korn, Marilyn Manson- Rebellion! Insane! I-don't care-what-you-think-about-me attitude! \m/

Coldplay- Soooooooothing.........................................

Deff Leppard- If you are in a relationship that's going strong, Deff Leppards for you. Even though I've never fulfilled that condition, still I've always enjoyed Deff!

MJ- Perfect songs for gym! Keeps the tempo up! And every once in a while you can catch someone trying to do 'the moonwalk'! In gym vests and shorts! *uncontrollable laughter*

Mozart and Beethoven symphonies- Introduced in our room by my room mate. Make me feel like a rich old loner, who has everything except people to talk to, and is passing his last few miserable days sitting in a rocking chair in a huge hall, listening to symphonies and remembering the good ol' days!

PS- Prof. Jha announced my name in class together with a 'Your attendance is short' remark. That, when I've only missed 5 classes out of like 20+ classes. And a guy whose only presence in the class is his name on the attendance sheet with an unbroken string of Absents, was not bestowed with the same gift as me! Great! Even a bad luck would've been better than this!

Wake me up when Sunday ends...

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 10:59:00 +0000

~~Sunday afternoon~~. ~~Boring~~ ~~Depressing~~ ~~Nostalgic~~ Confused Sunday afternoon. The Sunday which seemed so lucrative in my childhood days. The Sunday which has now become nothing but a buffer between Saturday and Monday.

Mom, dad and didi's wake up calls have been replaced by mobile alarm. Chitrahaar, Jungle Book and Shaktimaan have been replaced by Facebook, Blogger and Youtube. Early morning cricket has given way to early morning CAT coaching. Samose-jalebi in bed is now but a distant memory.

Still, I wait for Sunday with the same impatience and zeal as a decade ago.(I believe every human being is hard-wired to do that). It's just that when Sunday finally arrives, I don't know what to do. On the rare ocassions when I realize what I want to do, it's already Sunday evening!

Photography, reading and blogging are good. They keep me sane. But, I want more. I need more. I don't know what I am missing out on. But I do realize it's a huge miss. Beacuse I feel restless.

Family is 1200 kilometers and 17 long hours away. College friends, well, to say the least are preoccupied(with booze, late night gaming, worthless rantings-in short,everything I don't approve of as 'entertainment'). I don't have a girlfriend. And I thank God for that. Because even when I had one, my weekends were nothing but a marathon phone call...usually ending up in a quarrel over some trivial issue. So, I guess present situation is still better than that mayhem. School friends, I guess took the meaning too seriously. Their friendship ended(almost) no sooner than school did. Most of them have found new lives,new friends, new circles. A little FB chat every now and then is all I can claim out of their busy schedules. But I don't blame them. I can't. I shouldn't. One of my best friends from school( or so I thought) ended one such conversation on the excuse of going for lunch. After two minutes, I could see her application popups on my wall. Several of them, one after another! Hah! Could've told me to buzz off straightaway. Why this pretense?

But I don't want to single her out. She is a part of a larger group of people who occupied my life and my memories. And now they all seem to be in a rush to get out of that life and those memories. Strange!

Anyway, I think it's just that phase of life that people talk about. When you realize who your real friends are and all that stuff. And waise bhi all this emotional atyachaar is not my cup of coffee. I feel bad, but I know that I'll get over it as soon as I spew it out here on my blog! That's the good thing about me. I have an emotion-control button in my system! (How else do you think I survived 2 rejections and 2 breakups?!!)

PS- One thing I like about my room is that I get a cool breeze on my bed 24X7....I guess I'll rather sleep out this Sunday afternoon than ponder over useless thoughts about useless people!

The 'misscall' generation!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sat, 04 Sep 2010 11:32:00 +0000

Saturday morning is not just any morning.It is a very special morning.You don't have to worry about getting up late. You know that tomorrow is Sunday. And this knowledge is a heavenly experience. Even if you are getting up early (like me) you know that you have the whole day all by yourself.

So in lieu of this realization, I was quite happy and relaxed this morning. Until my eyes fell on my phone. 2 missed calls. One of them from a batch-mate who lives 2 rooms down the wing. The other from an unknown number(the usual suspect was the melody-queen sales representative from Airtel).

I hate missed calls. There is something about them that annoys me to the extent of paranoia. Just think about it. 2 rooms down the hall! The guy must have woken up, searched for his phone (because engineering students have their rooms REALLY messed up), searched for my number(until and unless he had me on speed dial,which I highly doubt) and then wait for me to pick up. Couldn't he just get up from the bed, come out and knock on my door? No sir, he wouldn't. Why not? It is because he belongs to the 'misscall' generation.

(You must be wondering what about that AIRTEL nightingale. Well, we can forget her for a while, even though she is guilty of another serious offence.Right now, let's focus on these guys and girls who at the first hint would give you a 'misscall').

For the Generation 'M', a misscall is a modern day 'Brahmastra'. For these people, misscall is a boon. Misscall is a lifesaver. For me, misscall is everything it wasn't supposed to be. Have you noticed how numbers are exchanged these days? The archaic tradition of 'You give me yours,I'll give you mine' has been silently replaced by 'You take mine and give me a misscall'! I would rather smash my phone on your head than do that, you lazy moron!

The most commonly heard phrases these days- "Hey, give me a misscall when you reach destination X", "Hey,give me a misscall if the professor comes in the class", "Hey, give me a misscall if you see Miss. X at the library", "Hey,going to the mess? Give me a misscall if the food is shit!".... Hello! What's the f*** is going on? Don't you get it? It is supposed to be a 'missed call'. One that is missed out on. Not a deliberate act emerging out of lowly money-saving thinking and lazy asses!

And then there is a species whose entire existence depends on these misscalls. You guessed it right. I am talking about 'The GF's'. Boy oh boy! Any CEO could take a tip or two from these lasses on how to cut down on costs without affecting 'customer' relations!

All they have to do is make a 'sweet' buzz on their honey-bunny's cellphone. And the rest will be taken care of. Why lady? Why don't you make a full-fledged call? Ever??? And poor chaps, they have to be constantly watchful. Why? Because if they actually miss that misscall, then hell hath no fury..... Believe me, it hurts me a lot when I see guys calling back their GF's instantly, mostly to hear their cribbing or worse, their scoldings. Phew! If only God gave us guys the same tacts as our Venusian counterparts...

But, the reason of my hatred is more to do with the doer than the deed itself. A misscall (not the actually missed call) raises many questions about the callers character. Is he a miser? Is he too lazy to actually make the call? Is he an illiterate who doesn't know how to execute the entire procedure of cellphone conversation? Or is he a miscreant who couldn't find a better use of his time? In any of the above cases, the caller doesn't deserve a call back. So to hell with you, Mr./Ms. Misscaller!

This trend would have been understandable a decade ago, when one cellphone call would cost a fortune. But today? I mean come on, calls are cheaper than matchboxes and chewing gums. So what's the excuse, huh? There is none. So, next time you pick up the phone, please go ahead and 'make the call'!

PS- Why do people keep saying "Misscall maar dena?", "Misscall maari thi?" etc. It is annoying like hell. Shoot me with a bullet, but please 'misscall mat maaro'!!!!

Of names and nicknames...

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 07:16:00 +0000

"Chunnu"- my mom called out in the middle of a busy street. I looked around, everyone was looking at Chunnu. And Chunnu wished that he would just vanish in thin air. I looked at my mom. Her innocent face wiped away most of my anger and irritation. Still, I walked up to her...

"Mom how many times have I told you that I don't like to be addressed by that name", I said with a frown.
"Why? What's wrong with that name?", mom asked.
("It sucks BIGTIME!",I thought)
"Everything", I said.

It reminds me of those nursery ryhmes wherein our protagonist would either be fighting with his more pathetically named brother, Munnu, over a silly rasgulla, or he would be doing some other stupid thing. STUPID CHUNNU! I don't want to be stupid!

Anyway, don't think mom stopped calling me by that dreaded name since then. She can't. She has been doing it for the last 21 years. Old habits die hard. This one would surely attend my funeral. Relatives would be crying and saying, "Oh dear Chunnu! Why did you leave us?"

One of the worst nightmares of my life is that I am rich and successful.(That's not the nightmare, that's the dream). I am getting some big honour and my mom is sitting in the front row and clapping.(That is also a part of the dream). Then suddenly she stands up and shouts-"Well done Chunnu!". The whole auditorium is silenced. Then everyone burst into laughter and the whole world comes to know about my disastrous nickname. Can you imagine my life after that? THAT IS THE NIGHTMARE!

And what if anyone from the family calls out my nickname at my wedding? The bride would surely run away. Whoever would like to get married to Chunnu?
I remember how I saw this hot young girl at my cousin's wedding. But before I could make a move, my dear mummy called out- "Chunnu, mere liye 1 plate dahivade le aana"!
I am sure that girl must've thought I am the family servant, who has been dressed well for the occasion. The last I saw of her, she was looking at me disgustingly and I felt like I was the most miserable thing on the planet.

Why Chunnu? Why not any other name? Varun is a pretty small name itself. And it also perfectly cancels out all possibilities of public embarrassment.( Until and unless, someone pronounces it as Barun. My school rickshaw wallah used to do that and most of my relatives from rural areas still make that costly error...)

"It is a sign of affection"- says grandma.
"It is a sign of the worst form of mental harassment that could be inflicted on a human being"- I cry out.(Figuratively, that is)

I believe the biggest insult to someone is to pronounce their name wrongly. And you can totally demolish them to the point of no return if you have given them a nickname as stupid as mine!

Whatever I do, my family and relatives are not going to change this habit.Not that they don't want to, but they can't.
I have to carry this curse my entire life...maybe in my afterlife as well!

PS- All you Golus, Bittus, Babloos,Chintus,Chinkus....amongst many others...I understand your pain!
But Shanky, I can't even imagine what you go through! (I mean, come on man, people give their dogs a better name!!)

Jottings in the book

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 18:26:00 +0000

I have decided that I am gonna discontinue the Blast from the Past series.I thought writing about those incidents would help me overcome them. But, now I think not writing will do the trick(hopefully)!

Also, I have decided to blog about one contemporary issue every week. I think there are a lot of issues I should/want to/need to speak about, besides my own life.

And, then I've also decided to write a satirical/sarcastic blog on Sundays.Nothing fancy, just an elongated quip on a random topic.

And I am thinking of starting a new fiction series....still in it's nascent stage though....will keep you all posted about that.

PS- Finally it's raining in Dhanbad! *ear to ear grin*

Uploading pics on FB? Be ready to lose a friend!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sun, 22 Aug 2010 07:21:00 +0000

The culprit image(or should we say the 'victim image')

The comments that followed...

Friend 1-mafia...!!!!...

Me- bad boy!

Friend 2- he he he !! timepass !!

(Ex)Friend- chamaar...(cobbler/Dalit sub-caste…a common slang in India)

Friend 3- luchha......(cheapstake)

Me-‎@(Ex)friend -ya ryt luk who's saying that? jealous hmm?? :)

(Ex)Friend- photu khichane shock hame nahi hai....(It isn’t me who’s interested in getting snaps clicked)

Me- ya probably coz u knw ur face ain't worth a pic! :P

(Ex)Friend - atleast i know it..u don't even know... :P and dare to question on my blog(The blog being talked about)....f u..i told abt it earlier(thesaurus)

Me- ohh so this is the reason of ur frustration! I see....u knw u shud accept it too...u ain't worth a pic or a blogpost either! :P

(Ex)Friend- mofu....i didn't see that comment when i made the comment....shakal hi teri kuch aisi hai..kya batau..(your face is like that only,what can I do?)

Me- hahaha....seeing u this much frustrated makes Melaugh even louder...poor little thing! go hoMeto mommy and cry out kiddo! ole ole koochi koochi!

(Ex)Friend- m nt frustrated..... chamaar....

Me- oh yeah...gt no other insult in ur bag huh?abey maine suna aaj friend 4 ne tujhe pel diya! (I heard friend 4 beat you up today!) :P

Me-‎(LOL)

(Ex)Friend- friend 4 mujhe kyon pelega be(why wud he do so?)....and i don't lyk to strip anybody on a social networking site... :P :P

(He doesn't like to strip anyone on social networking sites...Ironical,isn't it??!)

Me- oh yeah...u ain't gt the freaking balls to do tht geeko! And I heard ur blog was being banned for plagiarism!!! is it true?

(Ex)Friend- never..

Me- wht never? u ain't getting balls ever?

(Ex)Friend- do u have balls to face any difficult situation..the one u told me durin lunch..u fucking moron..u quietly pulled back....never know ur capabilities

Me- ooh....cheap shots...cuhmon (ex)friend u can do better than that!

(Ex)Friend- no i can't..happy with these words...u r nw evading frm the topic....nthg's cheap..u have a price to pay for evrything..see its my modesty to not write wat the incident was all about...

Me- go on write it...u knw u r acting so kiddish...goes on to show u can insult others but can't take it on yourself! ever heard the word 'hypocrite'??

(Ex)Friend- of course why should i take an insult.... and what for??

Me- leave it yaar...u r really sound so stupid ryt nw....seems like u r taking out ur frustration frm sum other incident here....

(Ex)Friend- yes...happy...this is what u want to here..and this is my last comment

Me- Thank God for tht! coz I was sick n tired of making fun of you anyway!! :P

My roomie- kya bc hai?bachhey ko chhor bhi do yaar (WTF? Leave the poor kid alone)

End of discussion!

PS 1- I had put up this pic(among others) with immense pleasure! I know they were kidding(were they really?)..but still it hurt bigtime!

PPS- After this the (ex)friend went on to remove me from his FB friend list…wow! Thanks man, because when you did that you just proved it you were never worth my friendship!

'Litti' in the rain

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Sat, 14 Aug 2010 17:30:00 +0000

Have you been out in the rain lately? Oh, I am sorry...I asked the wrong question. Considering it's India we all are living in, I should first ask, has it rained at all where you live? If yes(miraculously!!) then have you drenched yourself in it?

I did. After a long time. For a long time!

Saturday Afternoon. I had returned from a 4 hour marathon IMS class. The food as usual looked inedible.
Then suddenly something inside me( most probably my stomach) said I should go out and eat Litti-Chokha( a traditional Bihari dish...one of the few good things I have discovered during my stay in Dhanbad). I oblidged. It was around 2 and the chances of getting the prize were slim(usually the natives go crazy for LC's and devour like 2-dozens per head at one go!). Anyway, off I went( I usually go out alone...not a spooky loner kinda way...but things just fall into place that way).

The first drop fell...on the forehead. Second closely followed and touched the tip of the nose. Soon enough it was all over me. Rain!
From that moment onwards whatever happened on that day is way to much for words...so I'll go for it in this fashion...

Running in the rain, avoiding some puddles, landing in others!

Raindrop splashes on the face while sitting in auto...reminiscent of the ride back from school during monsoons!
Fare- Rs. 4        Feeling- Priceless!

Hurled abuses at a car driver(alongwith the auto-wallah) who drenched me and him in muddy water...
Expenditure- Zero       Experience- Most enjoyable!

Hot Litti-chokha in a cool breeze...
Cost-Rs. 36        Taste- Unforgettable!

Smell of ghee and wet soil intermixing in my nose...that nostalgic feeling of home!
Price- Included above!           Payback- Enticing!

Being completely indulged in food, licking fingers, forgetting about onlookers!

Being single...not missing someone...and actually enjoying every moment of it!
Money- Nothing              Meaning- Everything!

Coming back all drenched...warm bath...drinking coffee and writing this blog... Priceless! :)

PS- Make sure to wash your hair after playing in the rains, they curl up and become a mess really! :)

Children of Confusion

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 07:15:00 +0000

How many times have you felt that you don't belong? How many times have you had absolutely no sense of what's going around you? How many times do you feel you are wasting time living the way you are, but cant figure out how to change it?How many times in a day do you think of your future(or past or present) and get confused?

If the answer to all or some of these questions is 'many', 'most of the time' or 'all the time' then let me tell you what you are....You are a child of confusion!
Right from your birth, confusion has been there! In all probability, your parents were confused about your timing, your need, your gender and your utility!!!
When you were 3(after your parents were satisfied with you), they were confused about which school to put you in.
When you were 12,they were confused how to talk to you about the birds and bees(Poor chaps,if only they knew you were already quite familiar with them)!
When you were 18, they were confused about your college.At 21, about your career. At 25,about your marriage.

At 28,they will retire.And you will take over.The cycle repeats.Seemingly endless and clearly meaningless!

As a child of confusion, you are a rightful heir to its property. You are confused, and rightfully so! You were confused(by others).Again and again, until the point where you started getting confused automatically.And you never bothered. Because everyone around you was just like you...confused!

I look around and what do I see? I see confused people. Confused about everything.Which clothes to wear?What hairstyle to keep?What career to choose?Where to work?Whom to talk to? Whom to fall in love with?Whom to marry?Which car to drive? Where to settle?Where to invest?How to live?
Like I said,confused about everything!

But how did you end up so confused?Or were you always like this?

I look around again and what do I see now? I see gigantic posters of the rich and the famous,telling you which underwear to buy,which jeans to match it up with, which car to own, which laptop to work on,which apartment to live in, how to f*** your lover, which 'protection' to use while doing it, where to invest all your life's savings...in short,they tell you how to live.
Not only that.Once you start taking their advice,they influence you.After some time, they decide for you. That's when the 'you' in you dies.That is when a child of confusion is born!

In all probability, you are confused about the validity of my theory. I can't blame you, it is your birthright to be confused!
And since you are so good at taking advices and following everyone who says he can lead you, take one from me too-"Stop being a reflection! You are confused because only because you choose to be so. If you want to know what you want, ask YOURSELF.Make your own rules because it's your f***ing life!"

PS- I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure that you realize what you heard is not what I meant- Robert McCloskey

Kappa

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 12:08:00 +0000

I ‘met’ a dog today.

The reason why I say ‘I met a dog’ and not ‘I saw a dog’ is that the dog I met was no ordinary dog. He was a special canine.Very special. He could talk!
Actually, I was on my way to attend the day’s lecture when he stopped me from behind to ask what time it was.I was startled at first.But then he appeared so casual, it made me feel like a dog talking to a human was as natural a phenomenon as, say, old men belching loudly after meals.
“I must rush. Actually, I am late for my lectures”, he said in a hurried tone. Lectures? WTF?Which dog attends lectures? He appeared to be more confusing than any professor I had come across in my life.
He comprehended the look on my face easily.“Don’t be surprised! You think only you guys have brains? We dogs are also very civilized.(Yeah right, that’s why you don’t have toilets and shit on the streets!) My name is Kappa”!(Okay, now I started to believe the ‘civilized’ thing!).”Listen, I am getting late so I guess we’ll catch up later”, he said and was about to run away when I called out to him loudly. “Hey Kappa, come on man. We seem to be mixing up well. Let’s have a cup of coffee and some biscuit leftovers!” He seemed to be offended by the leftover remark, but he agreed anyway. “The human behaviour classes are so boring anyway. What is there to learn about them? “, he smirked.It was my turn to be offended.
During the chat I came to know a lot about him. He was the smallest in his family. He had been good at studies since childhood. After school finished, Kappa’s parents made him give the CIT-JEE (Canine Institute of Technology…..). Kappa came out with flying colours, got into CIT, along with other ‘cream canines’ to embark on a journey to become what every canine parent dreams of for their puppy- a Caningeneer. But CIT was no ordinary place; Kappa had to face extreme competition. At times, he said, it was too much to cope up with. “Only last year, one of my seniors committed suicide by allowing a truck to run over him”! Plus the other devil was expectation. ”My parents are always asking about my CGPA(Canine Grade Point Average).They want me to be the best. So does everyone else’s parents. Someone’s expectations will be shattered. Nobody wants their parents to be that someone”, he said in a low tone, reflective of his dismal performance in the exams of late.
But he had managed to live with it. ”It isn’t total gloomy doomy after all. We guys are good at seeing the upside in everything. We make fun of professors, bunk classes, eat out at the best garbage joints, check out nice bitches (no pun intended) and make the most out of this time of our lives. Although, the fine line between fun and foible is crossed easily. Cigarettes, beer, drugs…you know what I am talking about”. (Hah of course I know, we invented these things you dog!).
He continued…
“You know, placement is not a problem. These days the market is booming. Domestic sector is always an option. Security and Investigation agencies go for the best in the batch, but for a mediocre like me, there are other options like join CIT coaching institute. And these days, many of us also go for the CAT (no pun intended, again) - Canine Admission Test for CIM (Canine Institute of Management). Many others go for CPSC (Canine Public Service commission).And the worst of the lot become professors! (Seriously no pun intended, this one’s a direct remark!)”
“Okay now I’ve already missed one lecture, I can’t afford to miss this one or I’ll fall short of attendance!” he said and ran away.
I was busy pondering over his story and drawing comparisons….

2 weeks in Hell!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 05:48:00 +0000

14 days...336 hours!
It seemed like an eternity.Rewind 2 weeks: Everything normal. And then suddenly, he went away.Nobody knew what happened to him. Even I was unable to find out what made him go away. And his unexpected departure had left me in a shock...and pain.
I couldn't sleep at night.All through the day, I kept looking at his image in my mind. I had been really close to him.He had been like a guardian to me. Always there to comfort me in my times of distress. We had spent a lot of time together. But amazingly, we didn't talk that much. He was always in my room. The three of us(me, Vikas and him) were almost inseparable.
On that unfortunate day, Vikas returned to the room late at night. He switched on the lights and found him motionless. He tried to wake him up but he was already gone. I was on my way, returning to college after summer vacations when all this happened.
I was the last one to know about it.
Friends came in my room and consoled me. Some told me to move on, some gave the usual 'adjustment crap'. The warden too was worried about my condition. He called me up and told me he would do his best to find out what had actually happened.
I was lying on my bed, thinking about him and the time we had spent together.Sudennly, Vikas entered and shouted...

" Abey electrician aaya hai, bol raha hai yeh fan short ho gaya tha. Abhi theek kar dega woh!!"

I was already jumping around.And why not?
'He' had returned from the dead!

"You should........

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 07:24:00 +0000

...concentrate on your studies. Yeh ladki wadki ke chakkar chhod de,kuch nahi milta in sab se!"- Mom
...concentrate on me more.You don't give me enough time."- Girlfriend

...pass the ball more often. Self mat khela kar."- A soccer teammate
...keep possession. Thoda dribble toh kiya kar."- Another soccer teammate

...call your mom everyday."- Dad
...call your dad everyday."- Mom
...call your sister everyday."- both Mom and Dad
...call me as many times as you can."- Girlfriend

...grow long hair.Aajkal toh lambe baal ka fashion hai bhaiyya!"- Barber
...keep short hair. Lafange ladke baal lambe karte hain!"- Grandmother

...crack CAT and go to the IIM's. Aajkal MBA mein bahut paisa hai!"- Family
...crack UPSC and become IAS. Shaan ki naukri hai. Aur uppar ki kamai bhi hai!"- Relatives
...crack GRE and go to the 'US of A'.Yahan India mein kya rakha hai?"- Family and Relatives

...lose your virginity."- An experienced friend
...not talk about 'it' with me.It's bad."- Girlfriend

...go for arrange marriage.It will make your parents happy."- A friend who is herself committed for 6 years and plans to introduce her boyfriend to her family soon
...go for love marriage. Parents sab maan jaate hain."- A self proclaimed loveguru

..................And I thought this was my life,huh!!!

Blast from the past-Part 2: Enter the dragon!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 10:23:00 +0000

Continued from Blast from the past-Part 1: The Warning Signs ....

'INDIAN SCHOOL OF MINES DHANBAD' read the entrance gate.It was night and the light was low, but I could make out that a few letters were missing."Strange",I thought.I looked around as we entered the campus but couldn't make much in the dark."There aren't no street lamps?", I looked towards Papa with questioning eyes. Papa was talking to the father of another fresher like me. That fresher was sitting next to a senior in the back of the auto,and his situation reminded me of a lamb surrounded by wolves.

__________________________________________________________________________________

We were around 12 people in that auto-Four freshers(me, the 'lamb', a tall skinny fellow and a short skinny fellow), four fathers and four seniors.Soon after, we arrived at EDC(short for Executive Development Center) where we were supposed to stay until registration and other formalities made us students at ISM.

An 18 hour train journey can make you doze right away.But the excitement, anxiety and fear(of course) had changed the situation.I was turning sides the whole night. And for the 2-3 hours I think I slept, I had the strangest dream ever.

In my dream I was on an island, all alone.There were huge structures all around, and they were probably made of books. The roads were zigzag paths and after walking for a few hours I realized they all returned to the same point. Suddenly, there was a huge noise behind me and as I turned around, I saw a huge eight-faced dragon! The dragon had shiny green eyes and he looked at me and thundered-"Don't let them get the better of you..."

__________________________________________________________________________________

"Okay so this is your room,106" my father looked at me as we started to enter the room.By 'we', I mean me,papa, my roommate Prashant Shukla(Mining Engg.) his father and his brother. Strangely though, we soon found out it was quite difficult for 5 people to be simultaneously be present in there.The problem solved soon enough as me and Papa got out to buy some items I would be needing.The city was nothing like Ghaziabad, it was worse, in every sense.I mean no malls, no multiplexes,no hang-outs,no girls!!! I really wanted to know if that's what our government thought would be an environment conducive to studying.
After the regular shopping and all, Papa stayed for 1 more day.Then he left on Sunday and from Monday we had our classes.I got to know there were 418 more freshers like me and 41 of them were in my wing only. That very evening I got to know a few of them and it seemed like we would get along nicely. All of us together survived the most dangerous meals of our lives that night and after some casual group discussions,moved to our 'rat holes'. Prashant seemed to be kind of an introvert and I(a chatterbox) was also not in a mood to beat about the bush. The thought of being in this place, away from everything I had ever known, was too hot to handle.
And we went to sleep at 10.It seemed like ages the last time I went to sleep so early.
And then the same dream.
"It is coming.They are coming. They want to take you away. Don't let them get the better of you!!"...

(Oxy)morons!

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 06:53:00 +0000

Wikipedia defines Oxymoron as "a figure of speech that combines normally contradictory words". Hmm...a lot of examples instantly flashed before my eyes:-
An honest politician!
What is with these guys?? I mean, why do they have to always keep stuffing everything up their...you know where!!! Bloody black holes for money! Stupid people getting all that power because of more stupid people like you and me.
The Delhi rain!
For those cynics who don't believe in global warming, I suggest you please come to my home...it's like the Thar desert minus the sand! Where is all the water gone man??!! It wasn't long back when I used to return from school all drenched in water. I get drenched now too, in sweat that is! And thanks to those black holes, electricity is as much a scarcity as the rains. Only God knows where we are headed(he has given a hint though-a four letter word that starts with 'H' and ends with 'L'...keep guessing!!)
Cheap petrol!
At Rs.57 a litre, it is already half of the pocket money I get per month! :P
Everybody's buying a car, but how many can actually afford it? I did some math(not that I am very good at it!!)...We have a Maruti Alto at home,a 2.75 lac decent family car. It notches almost 50 kilometres a day.And in the crawling traffic of the city,it gives around 12kmpl.So,(50/12)*365*57=Rs.87000!One-third of what we invested in the car!Per year...every year...
I have started saving money for a bicycle already... :)
True love!
Okay okay, I know it's a cliche, but seriously, where is true love?Or love for that matter? I am single nowadays(thankfully!!),but even when I was committed, I didn't feel anything I read about love in those rosy-cosy novels! One of the girls preferred a same-profession guy...as if that's got to do anything with loving her? The other was daring enough to cheat and stupid enough to get caught! And yet there was one who just wouldn't trust, and yes the one who was only interested in jumping into the sack... hello? What's going on?? Where is the L-O-V-E honey?
Uncomplicated life!
Naah...don't have to explain this one,do I? The ups and downs, the twist and turns, the friends and the foes,success-failure...all mixed up to make one helluva show!Enjoy!

PS-A kind professor, peace in Kashmir,India@FIFA World Cup,US troops backing out of Middle east,Lindsay out of rehab/jail, Indian TV sans saas-bahu serials....the list is long!!! : /

Back on the track

get.varun.tyagi@gmail.com (VT) — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 05:49:00 +0000

Hi there!
The past 3 months have been one heck of a roller coaster ride(as if my entire life is any different!!)...I almost got cut off from the cyber world,thanks to semesters, training, soccer, gals and blah blah blah....you know,the usual stuff...forgot totally I have a blog that fortunately enough,has some followers. And since I don't want that to change, I realized it's high time I returned to the scene.
So here I am again...with lots of things to share...the next few days will see me writing about my (mis)adventures in Vizag, the vuvuzelas, and the continuation of 'Blast from the Past' series...keep reading...

PS-The word 'Professor' has been derived from the French word 'preufesseur' which literally translates to "one who has a connection with the devil"!!!
(Ok now don't go Googling about it,it was a joke you silly) ;)