Here’s the deal: marriage is a word with two meanings. On the one hand, it is a legally binding contract between you, a partner, and the State. On the other, it is a holy covenant between you, a partner, and God. But see, here’s the thing: your minister understands that there’s a difference between the two. In fact, he proclaims the difference every time he presides over a wedding. “By the power vested in me by God and <insert state here>. . .” That said, I do not intend to comment on the second, religious meaning of the word. To say they are inseparable is to admit that your government has control over your beliefs, and I think that’s a pretty contradictory statement from you conservatives out there.

In any event. Gay marriage. this handy chart outlining how each state defines marriage, which ones abide it, which ones ban it, and which ones have no legal stance on the matter. For those who don’t want to click and read, it breaks down this way:

37 states have defined marriage as being between one man and one woman. 32 of them have passed statutes to that effect, 5 have made “Defense of Marriage” amendments to their constitutions. **Note: their numbers say 33 and 4, but they haven’t updated with the new North Carolina amendment.**

So, you might say, 37 states have said “No Way!” That’s clearly more than the majority of states, and while that seems like pretty strong evidence that maybe they’re on to something, let’s not get caught up in the argumentum ad populum (shout out to Annie Olson. Fallacies, what what!) red herring. In fact, Jim Crow laws, which are (now) almost universally agreed upon as unethical and supremely misguided were enacted in a whopping 35 states.

These laws were enacted shortly after that little war we had in this country in the mid 1800s in response to the new-found freedoms of the African American population. Such laws prevented rights and privileges based on race and/or social class, requiring land, money, education, etc in order to vote, hold office, etc. They were enacted to prohibit African-Americans from becoming effective citizens, with full rights and privileges. But of course, even then they bothered to hawk them as “separate but equal.”

I don’t know anyone who really thinks the Jim Crow laws were a good idea. I mean, I do live in Texas, and I have no doubts that there are a good many people who /DO/ wish they’d come back, but they’re the same ones who would likely not pass muster on the literacy portions anyhow, so we’ll just assume they don’t count. But, fortunately, as part of the resolutions from the war, the Amendment XIV was passed, allowing (among other things) equal protection under the law, stating:

All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

But here we are, in 2012, passing laws that are directly counter to this statement. But wait, you say! Marriage isn’t a right! It isn’t a law! Well, the “right to get married” doesn’t exist, BUT there are certain legal amenities it provides. While these are many and widely varied, I’m going to focus on one that I haven’t seen discussed before, but should anyone know where it has, I’d love to know.

The Federal Rules of Evidence provide, as a matter of course, privilege between spouses to not have “adverse testimony” against each other. This allows a spouse to refuse to be called as a witness by the state against an accused spouse in order to preserve “marital harmony.” This is considered a “privilege,” and protected under FRE Rule 501 (See Notes of Committee on the Judiciary, Senate Report No. 93–1277). In fact, Texas offers the privilege as well.

It’s important to note the term privilege used in both of these documents. Amendment XIV expressly forbids making a law which “shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States” (emphasis mine). So, I’m going to go ahead and assume that no one assumes that homosexuals born here or naturalized are NOT citizens of this country, so I fail to see how any statute or amendment is lawful with regard to the United States Constitution, which cannot be contradicted by any law of the many states.

But wait, you may say again: the spousal privilege is only for spouses! If they can’t be married, it doesn’t ever apply! Well, you’re correct there. And here’s the problem with that. The privilege does NOT extend to boyfriends/girlfriends, engaged couples, long-time friends, etc. So by default, a homosexual couple is precluded from this privilege. But there’s a fundamental, and important difference between those allowed the privilege and those who aren’t, even among the heterosexual population: the choice to become married.

Boyfriends/girlfriends, long-time friends (of any permutation of sex), etc have all CHOSEN NOT TO BE MARRIED. Should they wish to be married, they’re allowed, but only so long as they happen to be sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex. And really, that last part seems entirely irrelevant. If a homosexual couple chooses to be married, then why can they not receive the privileges and benefits (and pitfalls!) commensurate with the legal bond of marriage? In this case, the homosexual couple wishes to abide by the laws and regulations of the State and form a contract with all its rights and privileges, but are denied on arbitrary grounds. If a homosexual couple doesn’t wish to get married? Sure, fine, deny them spousal privilege, just like you do heterosexual couples who choose not to get married. But to deny a privilege allowed by our state legislation and our federal judiciary system based solely on whether or not the two people have the same set of genitals? That just seems kind of absurd, doesn’t it?

What legal bearing does a set of genitals give? Certainly none in differentiating between the two since other legislation was passed barring the discrimination based on such genital difference. So why then, do genitals suddenly matter when it comes to a legal contract between two consenting adults? There isn’t an answer beyond a great many people presuming that unlikeness equates to moral turpitude.

But therein lies the problem. It seems a great many of the American people have conflated the legal and religious meanings of marriage, and assume they should be the same thing. If you’re going to do that, why not ban any marriages performed by a mullah or imam? By a satanist? By a Catholic or a Baptist or a guru? Their set of marital standards may be considerably different, but all that seems to matter are the ones you can see: whether it’s two people of the same sex or not.

Any way you slice it, the rule is exceedingly arbitrary. I don’t grudge anyone who, because of his or her religious beliefs, will not marry someone of his or her same sex. If that’s what your belief system says is the moral thing, great. But how can you have the audacity to say that your religious beliefs trump a legal contract between some other people and the State? Baptists don’t think drinking is moral, but there aren’t nation-wide campaigns saying we should bring prohibition back because beer is violating the sanctity of our grocery stores. It may not be moral to be gluttonous, but all-you-can-eat buffets still exist without provocation.

Let’s get it together, and use our brains a little bit, and realize that at the end of the day, that gay couple next door who can’t bind themselves together legally are still going to have sex tonight. They’re still going to make their mortgage payment, and they’re not going to eat your children, burn your bibles, or shoot your dog. Step back and ask yourself: In the real grand scheme of things, what difference does this make? And you can even extend that as far as you want. Does a gay married couple affect your relationship with God, your view of heaven? Hell? Life? Love? If it does, you are weak-willed and unsure of either yourself or that in which you believe. If it doesn’t, then why not just love and let love?

It’s that last one that really bugs me. I like to think that I’m strongly independent. That I can survive solely on my quick wit and boyish good looks, but really, I’m constantly thinking about what someone else thinks or perceives about me, and that’s where a good deal of the fear comes from. Not that I think I can’t do it, but it’s almost like there’s some invisible expert on <insert topic here> standing over my shoulder, measuring me up. It’s ridiculously paralyzing.

Well, I’ve decided to take a stand against my own cowardice, and while that does not mean I’m going to throw caution to the wind, I am going to make a more concerted effort to do things that scare me. I started this journey yesterday.

I bought that, a Piaggio MP3 500. It’s a scooter, not a motorcycle exactly, but close enough, and they’re tons of fun to ride. I’ve been wanting one for years, but I’ve always been too scared to actually do it. What if I crash? What if people make fun of me? What if . . . For years I’ve been playing that game, but it’s over now.

So, I’ll be getting my motorcycle license soon, and then it’ll just be me and the road. Me and the road and a million people driving multi-ton death machines trying to run me over. I mean. Me and the road. Definitely just me and the road. I’m a responsible individual, and I know I don’t need to worry about myself going out and trying to do anything stupid, or driving too fast, or whatever. I am also aware that there are irresponsible people out there on the road, and I must pay attention to them.

The fear lies not in me, but in what people are going to think as I’m learning to ride better. Will I accidentally corner too wide, and look dumb? Will I have to slow down a little too much before a turn? Will I be a little over-cautious and look silly driving a little under the speed limit?

It sounds stupid when you write it down, but that’s what’s really been stopping me FOR YEARS. Is how silly I’ll look, even though I don’t really imagine there’ll be any problems. It’s just irrational, but it’s similar to how I approach almost everything I do.

So this is step one of a long and difficult journey out of fear and reticence to try anything new. Who’s with me?

In any event, there’s a fix for that solidly planted in the future. But at least we’re a little closer today. The geniuses over at MIT have made some pretty significant strides in creating what I like to callSmart Sand, but they call it “self-sculpting” sand.

The idea is pretty simple: tiny individual grains can be given a command to switch their magnets on or off to combine together to make –on demand– nearly anything. A hammer, a perfectly sized wrench, socket, screwdriver. A jack, a lug wrench, a – well, you get the idea.

Combine this with the glasses technology from my last post, and you’ve got a virtual bottomless toolbox anywhere you need it. The glasses can transmit information to the toolbox about the task at hand, automatically measuring bolts and screws, so you can reach in and pull out the right tool every time, easier than “Accio Screwdriver.”

Imagine having one in your car. You never have to worry about whether you’ve got a jack, or the tools to change your tires. Have them for astronauts so they can always have the tool or the part they need without the need for large and heavy sets of tools.

This is just another step forward, and while the researchers at MIT are a long ways from having small enough component pieces to actually form many useful objects, the fact remains that they’ve made great strides, and it’s just a matter of time before the technology gets small enough to make their dream a reality.

I’ve always been one to look forward to the future, often to a fault, but it’s exciting what’s out there. What we can do. What we have already done to reach such feats of technical and scientific skill and prowess. Often people look to nature to find the beautiful and the wondrous, and I don’t mean to say that we are wrong, but it is not arrogant, it is not prideful to also look at the works of man and stand in awe of our ingenuity, our creativity, and our penchant for solving problems. The natural world has its many marvels, and I revel in those as well, but from time to time, I feel we ought to pat ourselves on the back. We’ve come a long way in an exceedingly short amount of time, whether you want to count time on an evolutionary or creationist scale.

Over the course of a few thousand years, we’ve gone from caves, to farms, to written tablets, to bronze, to iron, and so on to today, the silicon age. It’s mighty satisfying to know we beat continent-wide epidemic, 2 world-wars, the thread of nuclear annihilation, and we’re still going strong inventing, dreaming, and making those dreams reality. Helps me feel good on days when I feel like I’m just spinning my wheels anyhow. How about you?

If you’re too lazy for that, maybe watch this video:

Now, please don’t misunderstand me. I fully realize the video is a dramatization, and a window into what this technology will one day become (hopefully). That said, I am as giddy as a Panam district citizen at an all-you-can-eat buffet. I’m a technology nut anyway, but augmented reality is probably the most exciting terrestrial development I can think of. It’s the closest I’ll probably ever get to real cybernetics and neural enhancements. An always-present, non-invasive means of instant research and information about whatever you happen to be doing. HUD based turn-by-turn directions, instant stats on $trivia, enhanced “mental notes” with pictures attached. And these are just the trivial things.

Consider medical reference books for similar light-weight non-intrusive tech for surgeons, complete with patient data and history, quick first-person pictures for reference, the ability to teleconference with another surgeon on a particularly delicate or crucial surgery. This tech could be used in similar law-enforcement situations. It could be used be cooks, by salespeople, by attorneys. The possibilities are endless, and this is just the beginning.

Maybe I’m just a sucker, but I’ll be purchasing these despite their inevitable limitations. I want to see where it starts, where it’s going. I mean, who wouldn’t want to watch the world change?

What upcoming tech gets you excited? What can’t you wait for?

That said, when I feel like a company has done something right, and has continued to do things right for the last 7 years I have been a customer, I feel like I ought to let you know. In this case, I’m talking about my hosting company, Dreamhost. They’re not only a very fun, entertaining company to work with (You should see the newsletters they send out. Hilarious every time.), they provide a pretty top-quality service. Granted, they have not been entirely without their issues in the last 7 years I’ve been a customer with them, but the amount of time I have had to deal with problems is negligible at best. They’re pretty great.

Every now and then, when I’m mucking about behind the scenes, I have been known to mess things up, and I have to go to their support staff for help. They have always responded promptly, with well-worded, precise, and real help. I have never gotten a form letter back, it’s always been a real person giving me real advise on how to get back up and running in a timely manner.

Recently, as I’m sure you’re aware, a number of wordpress blogs all over the internet were infected due to a security flaw found in a great many of them. Mine was one such blog, and while I was, yet again, letting mine waste away, I failed to notice. When I did happen to notice, I took the site down, dreading the workload ahead of me to clean it off, and get things back up and running. In fact, I had this exchange with Rachelskirts about my displeasure with the ordeal:

Sure enough, I got a friendly email from Elizabeth L in Dreamhost support, with a wonderfully complete email full of possible vulnerabilities, a list of files they were able to clean and a list of files they removed for me, etc. I was given a full set of instructions and tips on how to avoid such problems again in the future. It took me a little over half an hour to follow the instructions and get everything locked down.

So, that brings us to the part where I tell you to go sign up for them and surreptitiously use a referral link that will net me some money. Well, I could do that. Or, I could just tell you that I believe you should be using Dreamhost so strongly that I’ll give my entire referral bonus (a generous $97) entirely to you, so you can get a yeaar’s worth of hosting for about $22. Go sign up with a new account, and use the promo code “GO97.” If you don’t get the option to, just email support and let them know you’d like to use the GO97 promo code, and you’ll get $97 off your first year.

So, Thanks Dreamhost! I’m glad to have my site back.

In that vein, I’ve decided it’s time to talk about something a great many people don’t understand. Depression is a very real medical and psychological condition, which isn’t solved by “a little more Jesus,” or “Just get over it,” or “He really should just grow up.” I have heard each of these responses to the topic of depression, and how it’s not real, it’s “just in your head,” and if you were stronger it wouldn’t be a problem.

I think a lot of the ignorant comments surrounding this disease comes from, well, ignorance for one, but it’s a very difficult thing to understand when you don’t know how it feels. I will attempt to dispel the fog surrounding how it feels to be depressed. Understand that how /I/ experience depression may be very different than someone else, but generally, many of the hallmarks are universal. This post is one I have tried to write a number of times, but have never quite been able to come up with the words, but after a particularly tough morning, I sent what follows to a friend, and for the first time, I felt like I had a decent glimpse of what it feels like:

Some days everything just goes wrong all at once and it feels like everything you have is just slipping away into nothingness, and you’ll be left standing there staring into the void wondering what you did to deserve this, what you could have done differently to avoid it. But then you realize that it doesn’t matter anyways, because it’s all gone and there’s no getting it back, no recovery, there’s only you and you have two choices: pick up and move on or stay put and let the void consume you, and you wonder if there’s even a difference.

Imagine you’ve gone to a soothsayer, who has a penchant for never being wrong, and she tells you that “Tomorrow, your world will end. You will not go to heaven, you will not go to hell. You will cease to exist, and everything about you will be forgotten forever. You will leave no legacy, you will simply never have existed.” The opportunists in the crowd will take this advice as carte blanche to have a ball. But really think about it. Look around you at everyone you love, everything you’ve done. All the lives you have touched, and all the lives who have touched you. Nothing. NOTHING will remain. Your life and all the hard work you’ve put in amount to nothing. And nothing meant anything. Why did you even bother?

Pretty depressing, huh? Now imagine waking up with that feeling every morning. Imagine taking a shower, brushing your teeth, doing any of the hundreds of mundane little things you have to do just to get ready to, what, go to work? And what for? Does it matter? Will it ever?

It’s those thoughts that fester in the mind, that gnaw and eat their way through any barriers of thought and reason. They form an impenetrable downward spiral, neigh impossible to stop, even when you know it’s happening. Fear leads to doubt, leads to anxiety, leads to self-doubt, leads to loathing, leads to nothing. All roads lead to Nothingness.

These are feelings that I have lived with since I was about 9 years old. It started off with my just not feeling quite right. I remember not really feeling like all the other kids /looked/ like they felt. So I started to fake it. I kept it to myself because I didn’t understand it, and it was easy enough to keep up the act, but when I got to high school, I began to wear thin. I spoke with a mentor about everything, and started seeing a counselor. I didn’t like him, and quit going. I also got on medication, which I took for a while and quit. That song and dance was repeated often. I’ve been through more medications than I can remember, and I’ve seen a handful of counselors, most of whom I ended up quitting, disappointed in their inattention and silly games. I have continued to quit the medications cold-turkey when I get on them.

It has been a long process, and I have not been the best patient, but I will, this coming week, be visiting the doctor to get back on the medication. It’s occurred to me that maybe I need to get this depression in check, because there are too many people who it affects. My ability to keep up the act 24/7 has waned, and I’m beginning to lash out and hurt people around me. So it’s time to swallow my pride, and get the help I need.

But as for depression itself, some people are depressed because of some major life event they can’t get a handle on. Some people are depressed because of neurochemical imbalance. Some people are depressed for, well, the list goes on and on.

There’s good news, though. Our good friend Science has given us a plethora of anti-depressant medications which fiddle with your brain bits and help you feel normal again. There are counselors, and therapists, and pastors, and gurus, and friends, and chocolate. It’s not the same for everyone, but it’s no less insidious, and it can cause some very real life-altering problems.

So let’s talk. Do you know someone who is clinically depressed? Are you? How do they deal with it? How do you? Do you have any questions about depression? If so, please ask, and I’ll do my best to answer them. So let’s talk. Let’s all gain a little understanding.

That said, the Internet lends itself to a great sense of anonymity if you choose. Domains can be registered under any name (for now), you can post to websites under any number of pseudonyms, and you can tell anyone anything you like, because, you don’t have to connect your real life to the internet. This has its positives and negatives, to be sure.

On the positive side, it allows people in oppressive countries to voice their concerns and complaints in a forum everyone can see, and not become a prisoner of the state in the process. On the negative, it allows people to get away with any number of heinous acts of abuse and depravity against people, children, etc. I don’t think anyone can say that it wouldn’t be good if we could do something to stop these acts, particularly those involving children.

Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX), the very same representative who introduced SOPA, has introduced a new bill right on the heels of the suspension of PIPA and SOPA. It’s called H.R. 1981 or the “Protecting Children from Internet Pornographers Act of 2011.” The bill would be more aptly named “H.R. 1984,” but I suppose the PR fallout would be a bit much.

I linked the bill there, but The Atlantic explains it well enough.

In short, the bill would require your ISP to keep records of everything you’ve done on the internet, attached to your IP address and YOUR NAME, along with financial information and any other personal identification. These records would be kept FOR 18 MONTHS. So, now, your ISP has a big database of your personal information tied to everything that’s been done through your internet connection.

There are a number of perfectly legal activities one could engage in online that one would rather not be remembered. While perhaps offensive to the moral sensitivities of some, the fact remains that pornography or adultery or what have you are perfectly legal. These should, in no way, be able to be used by your government against you in any way. But under this new legislation, they could be. Suspicious spouse? File a divorce, and get a subpoena during discovery, and your entire browsing history is suddenly public record.

As it stands, the reasons for which a person’s data could be subpoenas are extremely lax, leading to a government by fear, which in fact, is a tactic the Atlantic points out was used quite effectively by Russia’s communist leadership. But the lax position on subpoenas is really a minor problem. The problem is in the requirement for a database to begin with.

Let’s put aside for a moment the absurdly heavy-handed approach to catching a very small number of criminals, and focus on the track record of companies keeping our data safe: Sony is hacked for months before they notice, Bioware was hacked, exposing EA data, Zappos, Sony again, and . . . well, do you get my point? Intrusions happen. And they are happening a lot. Perhaps they’re just getting more press, but the fact remains: data is NOT secure, no matter how hard they try.

So, when someone hacks your ISP and gains the data in this master database of you, it’s just a matter of contacting you (using all that fun information they have about you), and blackmailing you for whatever they want, really, or they’ll tell the world you have a latex fetish. Or you meet up with people from Craigslist. While maybe not wholesome, these actions are not not illegal, and they’re certainly no one’s business but your own. Certainly not the hacker’s, and certainly not your government’s.

Don’t get me wrong: child pornography is a dastardly, disgusting thing, and it really should be stopped. However, as I said with SOPA, the loss of liberty of an entire country for the capture of a few is NOT justice. It is, in fact, the opposite, and I don’t believe for a second that these congressmen believe this (and any other similar) bill is for the greater good. This bill is hiding behind abused and defiled children, in the interest of increased government surveillance. Shame on Rep. Smith, and shame on our government for trying.

Lamar Smith has shown a clear disregard for the safety and protection of any of his constituents, and it is a symptom of a government who assumes it no longer has bounds, or a commitment to its people. It’s a symptom of a government, of a leadership, so used to getting exactly what they want, they will do what best serves themselves, not the people they represent. It’s a disgusting glut, and as we enter election time again, we must keep that in mind.

SOPA and PIPA may be dead, but the fight for the safety of the internet and privacy from our government is far from over. Stay vigilant, and don’t let up.

So let’s talk about what we can do. About what steps we can take, who must we contact, and where do we go from here?

But, keep in mind there is another evil. The rights-holders who are pushing this legislation and some new ICANN rules (about which you can read more on Adam Curry’s Blog) are really the target of our ire. While our elected officials should certainly not be pushed around by corporate lobbyists, we must also understand that they pay those lobbyists with the dollars we spend on their entertainment. We, as a people, have fought Big Tobacco, Big Oil, Big Medical, and now we need to add Big Entertainment to the fight.

We need tell them that it is NOT okay to push for a decrease in our freedoms. It is NOT okay for them to dictate national and international policy for the internet. What they’re trying to do is NOT okay. And we shouldn’t stand for it. Just keep that in mind as you consider SOPA, PIPA, and any other legislation proposing to do the same.

Sample Letter:

—-
To whom it may concern:

Currently, under your watch, two bills are being considered which will be detrimental to the free Internet as we know it. One in your purview, one in the other half of congress. The bills are SOPA and the Protect IP Act. These bills mean to allow corporate and governmental censorship across the globe, based on the flimsiest of accusations and without judicial review. They must not be passed.

Understand, my objection lies not in the purported reason for the bills. Online theft and piracy have grown to ridiculous proportions, and the rights holders have a right to justice. I do not have a problem with that. However, many acts of atrocity have been leveled against mankind under the name of truth, of justice. And while SOPA and PIPA are no genocide or ethnic cleansing, they do pose a significant threat to the future of innovation, of the Internet, which the UN has declared a basic human right. How can you reasonably assert that the destruction of a global commodity, which enables global communication and cooperation to an extent unheard of before, is a fair and just way of dealing with an effective minority of misfits and misanthropes?

First, for such a law to be reasonable, it must learn from the mistakes of the DMCA. These bills do not. Under their provisions, there still exists no judicial review, the accused still stands guilty and punished before being sentenced, and that goes against our most sacred law: The US Constitution. Secondly, these bills give wide and far-reaching punitive powers to rights-holders, which can affect websites far outside of the (expansive) jurisdiction of the United States. The method outlined in these bills would change the backbone infrastructure of the entire internet: DNS records. These records are what tell your computer where a website is located. They translate that “google.com” into an IP address which is how computers tell other computers where they are. A bit oversimplified, but good enough. By altering these records, you threaten stability and efficiency of a global communications medium, which has enabled people world-wide to protest cruel and oppressive governments. Is endangering that means of communication worth the few dollars in sales you would protect for Warner Brothers?

Further, the method outlined is largely ineffective. While you may block access to a website by its name when you change the DNS records, that website is still entirely functional and reachable by its IP address anyway. So what good have you done, other than to make ever so slightly more difficult, but still entirely possible to navigate to an infringing website? All the while, opening up the internet to gross exploitation of these bills for corporations to shut down (even if temporarily) rivals and competitors. This isn’t justice for anyone; it’s a business strategy for media companies.

This country was founded by a group of people with a radical sense of individualism. Granted, many of the people wanting freedom from British rule had business interests in mind, and we cannot forget that, but they also believed in those rights for everyone else, including their competitors. These two bills, and their sponsors, are a shameful mark on the face of our country’s history, showing blatantly and obviously that we are now willing to kowtow to corporate money and interests, rather than being vigilant to protect the interests of the people. And in this case, the interests of the world itself.

You walk a dangerous precipice. This is a watershed moment for our future: do we uphold freedom and protect the greatest means of global community ever invented, or do we protect private interests and trust funds, the world and the internet be damned? We voted for you. We dislike SOPA and PIPA. We trust you do make the right choice and vote against SOPA and PIPA as they stand.

Thank you for your time.

—-

It’s become apparent to me that this activity is healthy in a way other than for my heart. It’s a salve for the soul, really. A moment of peace in an otherwise hectic day. I know a good number of you already know this. But it’s a new sensation for me. Rather than getting bored with the monotony, I look forward to a chance to de-stress and decompress at the end of the day. A chance to just drown out any other problems or pending issues, and it just gives me some time to relax. And pant a little. But that’s okay too.

It got me to thinking as I walked this evening, how much such a routine could be beneficial for everyone. My wife has recently purchased a rabbit which lives in our guest room. Before bed, she goes to let it out of its hutch, run around a bit, eat some hay and oats, and just generally be cute. Don’t believe me?

See? Told you so.

When she gave that as a reason for purchasing the rabbit, I scoffed a bit, but now I see the value in it. You’ve got to have something to release, to switch-off, at least for a while. It helps you re-focus, re-evaluate your position, and just generally be a little more content than with what you’ve got, and where you are.

It gives you a chance to think, too, if you like. To work out a problem in a non-threatening, non-pressing environment. During that time of meditation, whatever form it may take, lets you take a fresh look at whatever’s been bothering you lately, and often, you can find a solution, or at least figure out something to try. Somehow, not being under pressure allows you to think a little less “in-the-box”, allows you to be a little more creative.

Let’s talk. So how about you? What’s your outlet? Your time of meditation? What do you do so you don’t have any responsibility, and can just relax for a while? If you don’t have that time, I’d challenge you to try it for a week. Even just a few days, and report back with what you’ve found out about yourself. Let’s all just sit back, relax, and enjoy ourselves for a few minutes a day.

The drop in activity level, plus an increase in junk food and increasing amounts of TV led to a pretty major increase in weight, and then came college. OH GOD. College. With the unlimited fried food in the cafeteria, the long nights munching snacks, drinking soda, and let’s face it: beer. My weight ballooned. I went from a pretty solid 250 to 300, then when I finished school, I spent 10 months unemployed, eating too much frozen crap, and I ended up around 330 by August of last year.

I started having chest pains in early May, sometimes pretty severe. And while the symptoms weren’t exactly matching heart attack symptoms, it was pretty scary. Scary enough, in fact, I left work and drove myself to the ER. After a series of blood tests, EKGs, and chest x-rays, they decided to keep me over night to run more cardiac tests the following morning. I was easily the youngest patient on the cardiology floor, and it was, to say the least, embarrassing. Being wheeled around, heart monitors attached, at 24 years old was a wake-up call.

After I got a clean bill of health, I went home with a very real motivation to actually lose some weight. After looking at a number of options, I decided that just plain old calorie counting was probably the best way to go, so I signed up for a site called My Fitness Pal. You can input foods and it will track calories, protein, carbohydrates, etc. It’s pretty great, and they even have apps for the iPhone and Android, which make it even easier to track your calories.

Through calorie restriction and exercise (Walking, a little jogging, recumbent bikes), I lost 40 pounds between May and August. It was decided that my chest pains were a result of a non-functioning gallbladder, and I had surgery to remove it. With the recovery period, some ridiculous situations at work, and some added stress due to some other family health problems, I fell off the wagon. between August and January, I went from the 291 I had dropped to back up to 317. When I discovered how much weight I had gained back, I was pretty discouraged, but my wife and I decided to get back to it.

So here we are again, counting calories, and exercising. I’ve already lost 12 pounds of that, and will soon be under 300 again. I can’t wait. I was looking at a few things on the MyFitness pal site, and I noticed they make progress banners. like this one:

Created by MyFitnessPal – Free Calorie Counter

I’ll be adding this banner to my About page, and I hope you all will help keep me honest. It’s a long road, but eventually, I’ll be hitting that 220 mark at the end of the banner.

This one, I think, deserves discussion more than most things. I know that many of you are in similar positions, though maybe not quite as extreme. So let’s share some ideas, some thoughts, some encouragement, and let’s all get healthy together. Every so often, I’ll post an update, and maybe some particularly good recipes I come across. I hope you’ll do the same.

So let’s talk. How healthy are you? Could you stand to lose a few pounds? Have a story of fantastic weight loss? How’d you do it? What could we all learn from your journey?